Chapter 77: Finally free?
Hope you are all OK if you're under lockdown. I hope this story helps pass your time and entertains you.
I wish I could update more quickly but online work deadlines keep eating up my time!
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Daryl
'No, Merle! NO!' I heard someone screaming.
Then realised it was me.
My body was stiff as a board from all the adrenaline and I felt something else that was just as rigid and urging itself against me. Of course, it was my brother's still hard, unsatisfied fuckin' leaking cock pressing into my backside and partially inside me! I started to panic then in case Merle finally gave into temptation and decided to fuck me anyway. However, he finally drew back a little but by no means completely, with great reluctance. I wondered if it was Dad's near rape attempt that made him act this way, even if he wasn't fully aware of it in his drug-addled mind. Made him want to seize back some sense of power and control? To not feel afraid anymore like I did?
I continued to struggle against him. 'Merle, get the fuck off me. He's flat out cold and we don't have to...' He still he didn't react but at least he wasn't pushing in further though. Just seemed dazed and confused yet his eyes were full of tears and lust at the same time he was moaning low in his throat.
'Merle! I said get the fuck outta me! We got 'im!' I almost yelled.
He didn't seem to hear even that but then he finally spoke like he hadn't heard me.
'Aww, so how about's we go ahead and do it then? Right in front of him?' He crooned, sending little sparks running down my spine despite myself. Just from what he was saying to me. 'Specially as he can't enjoy it now. Wouldn't it be fun, little bro?' And he tried to seduce me again into agreeing to it, caressing me down there! He had been obsessed about giving the bastard what he wanted ever since he found out, but under our own terms, not his.
He nudged a millionth of a bare inch in further and stopped as if asking me for my permission before he casually lowered his head to nibble on one of those sensitive places where he knew I liked it best. We'd only done 'it' once but damn he was gifted and I sighed almost on the verge of giving in to him. Despite being unprepped and the sweet pleasure pain (more pain right then, I had to admit).
'I can make it real good for you…' He boasted right before he did something to me that had me cry out and writhe needily beneath him, 'Ya know I can.' His sheer arrogance almost turned me more than what his actions. I knew I was in for a real treat, that he would take away the pain – all of my fucking pain - if I let him ...
'No…' I moaned almost reluctantly. 'Merle… What if he wakes up?' I started to scrabble against the floor frantically.
He sighed in impatience and half got off me. 'So?'
'What's the point if he can't see or hear nothin'?' I glanced over to where our father lay, bleeding from his head where he fell.
Not that I gave a shit.
'Well, if he's so damn out of it, he ain't gonna wake up for a while yet, right?' He tilted my head up back towards him and tried to kiss my words of protest away. 'So, we can play.'
I tried to heave myself up and shake him off, suddenly wanting him out. 'No, I said 'NO', Merle! GET OFF ME, NOW!' I whimpered. 'Ya hurtin' me!'
That finally got him. You could always count on his big brother protectiveness. He sighed and slid out, looking crestfallen. 'Sorry, about that.' He patted my back. 'Didn't have no choice…asshole jus' wouldn't let it go until I...'
I narrowed my eyes at him. 'Never mind that.' I got up. Then without even knowing myself what I was going to do - I started to kick Dad all over his body, especially between his legs – again and again as hard as I could. I screamed filthy obscenities at him while I did it like I didn't care if he woke. All my pent-up rage and terror was coming out and I would have kept on going until I killed the bastard.
For me, for Merle. Especially for what he'd tried to do to Merle.
For the beatings, the whippings with the belt. The burns from his cigarettes.
His leers, his gropes, his perverted threats.
For everything.
Merle watched me in a daze at fist then sniggered until I started to change the focus on my rage and kicked Dad in the face and the head. He grabbed me and dragged me away from our father's body as I fought him – kicking and screaming.
'Stop it, bro!' He shook me. 'We want him awake when we pay him back for all the things he did. We don't want him dead yet. 'Cos bastard should at least be awake to feel the pain.' He laughed without mirth, sounding like it hurt him.
I scrabbled at his hands around me, furious that I couldn't make him let me go. I fought so hard that I was panting hard out of exhaustion.
'Shh, easy now. We'll get him back for this, don't ya worry.' My brother soothed me.
'Quick – let's tie him up and gag him before he comes round!' I felt the panic rising up.
'Seriously, what shit did ya put in his drink, Darlena?' He asked when we took a break from heaving up Dad off the floor and into a small chair. We were breathing hard and both our faces were hot and sweaty. Even between the two of us (well, I know I was still no match for Merle), it was a struggle.
'I was only gonna put in one of ya roofies but he's got so heavy lately, (he flinched for some reason and I frowned back at him curiously) so I ended up givin' him an extra one. Jus' in case'
'Good job, ya did. Even then the bastard took his sweet time passin' out.' My brother spat hatefully on our father. 'Fuck 'im.'
We both hurriedly moved him to a smaller chair and tied him to it. I shoved a dirty dish cloth into his mouth and we made a gag - just like he used to do to me.
After we got him secured, with his nasty-ass mouth wide-open and snoring like a hog, we both let out a deep sigh of relief at the same time, then looked at each other.
I looked up at my big brother as soon as we were safely back under our roof. 'What we gonna do with 'im, Merle?' I whispered.
He chuckled and chucked me under the chin like it was all one big joke to him. Like I hadn't just drugged our father and we hadn't tied him to a chair.
'Let's think…', he scratched his head. 'We could wait until he wakes up and then screw in front of him…', he let out a dirty laugh and winked me.
'Merle!' I shoved him. 'Will ya stop with fuckin' in front of him all the time! That's what he wanted us to do and I tell ya now, ain't never gonna happen.'
He gave me a funny look. 'Calm down. Why aren't ya happy, Darlena? He ain't ever gonna touch ya ever again.'
'Because we can't leave with him still here, can we?' I sighed and sank to kitchen stool. 'Are we ever gonna be free of him, Merle? I mean …really free?'
He frowned and replied flippantly. 'What ya mean? We can jus' up and leave here. Forget about him and all this shit.'
I knew he was right but I shivered nonetheless. Part of me pictured Dad trailing our footprints like a ghost forever, tormenting Merle and torturing me, no matter how far away we got from there.
After all, he'd said he would never let me go.
'Come here.' Merle pulled me to him with a sudden look of fierce need in his eye that I couldn't ignore and I found myself distrusting him again. And because of the drugs, I wasn't sure if his sense of reality was still stuck in that dream he had babbled on about before. He was really unpredictable in his drug-fuddled state. He'd said he'd dreamt of me – had he dreamt about raping me? Like Dad had wanted him to? Maybe that was one of the reasons it wasn't a complete turn off for him? He sounded sober, wasn't slurring but his whirling eyes and bull's eye pupils told a different story. Was he mixing reality with his dream?
I was pulled back to my own reality when his hands started to squeeze my shoulders and his erection was nudging into me again. I remembered how leaky and urgent it had been against me before. 'Let me fuckin' go, Merle!' I yelled and to be fair to him, he did drop his hands immediately and back off a little.
However, he started to stroke his hard dick absently while staring at me like I was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. He bit down on his lower lip and moaned and I could tell from the sound that he urgently needed his release. I turned away in disgust because just like Dad, I knew all too well that it was me he used for his jerking off-material. 'Stop that shit or go do it somewhere else.' I barked at him.
But he didn't stop.
Now he had a pleading look of need in his eyes. 'Care to take care of me, little brother? Since ya won't let me fuck you?' He sneered, pointing down to it, 'with that talented little mouth and tongue of yours? Come on, won't ever ask ya again. It's just 'm so fuckin' hard it hurts.'
'No. Go and do yaself then clean yaself up, 'cos ya already had that up my ass.'
Merle gave me a dirty sneer at that, before shrugging, 'Fair enough.'
But he didn't move, just waited there and started at me, expectantly. 'I'm clean, what do ya say? Just this once, I promise. I'll go easy on ya, won't hurt ya, promise.'
I'd heard that line before.
However, I was suddenly over there like a shot, surprising even myself. One minute I'd been repulsed, now I wanted to make him feel good. Well, that was part of it but I was also fucking terrified of what he would do if I turned him down now because was sneering and leering at me like Dad. Looking like a younger, blonder version of him while the rest of me wanted to badly trust him, still believe that he wouldn't hurt me like he did.
I didn't think he would do it on purpose, after all he'd always been so considerate of me in the past, always giving me a choice, doing his best to make me as comfortable as possible. But I knew he wasn't in fully control of himself – what with Dad and the drugs.
Then again, we hadn't been together in that way, for very long. I didn't even know how long (if it did past today) it would last.
But I didn't think he would ever really hurt me as he seemed to take so much care not to hurt or threaten me further. However, I knew that he couldn't control himself fully – what with what happened with Dad and the drugs.
Anyway, his erection did actually look very painful.
I sank to my knees in front of him and spread his legs to give me more room while he moaned in excitement. Then, I nervously looked over at dad, suddenly feeling paranoid.
Merle's finger reached under my chin, tilting my face to look up at him. 'Hey, Merle won't hurt ya.' He whispered with an unreadable expression. 'I owe ya, baby bro.' The way he said that made something stir inside me, down there.
'I know ya won't.' I knew he needed to hear that from me just then and my stomach clenched. Why did it have to be all so complicated? Not dwelling on the 'why's' and the 'what if's', I took him deep in my mouth. He growled and stroked my hair while I worked on him.
He sank his fingers deeper into my hair, his nails lightly scraping my scalp, he knew what meth did to you. I couldn't hold back the moan that escaped me with all my senses heightened. Especially when his nails made contact with my skin. I looked up at him, completely embarrassed. He grinned knowingly at me, and winked.
At this point, some part of me wanted to please him. To hear the effect, I had on him. To prove to myself how good at oral I was. Besides, he had been almost gentle with me before. He didn't deliberately do anything to make my eyes fill with tears of panic and hurt. He cared in his own sick twisted way.
I had to remember that.
His hands were at the back of my head now, stroking my hair affectionately as I manipulated my tongue along the underside of his member. Occasionally sliding it over its head but doing it so randomly he never knew when I was going to do it, then increased the suction. He almost hurt me by grabbing my hair while I endured it and tried not to think about Dad who always did that. He cursed at first at his own lack of control before he changed tack.
Merle's hips were bucking up in erratic movements as he praised me breathlessly. Called me 'a good boy', 'a smart boy' and 'baby'. Or promised that he was going to make me come the same way but even better. Whenever I listened to what Merle was saying to me, it made me feel good. Not dirty and disgusting or afraid like Dad always did. This only intensified my need to hear my brother enjoy this.
I took him in deep again, as I cupped his balls in a firm grip. That made him crazy last time.
It did – of course it did, because it was like last time, somehow, I knew instinctively what he wanted, what he needed me to do. Where I should stimulate him and how. My whole life I'd been told that I was a nothing, no good at anything but I'd found something that I was good at.
Sex. Apparently, I didn't even need to try.
Merle brushed away the errant strands of hair that would have otherwise fallen into my eyes. 'I wanna look at ya, baby brother. Save this memory in my own private mental archive, 'cos I know it ain't probably ever gonna happen again, right?'
I ignored his not-so-subtle question but didn't pull back and stop what I was doing to answer, I didn't have the heart to. He was close now.
But my lungs were bursting and try as I might, I finally had to come up for air. He growled in frustration but didn't get angry apart from that. Didn't hurt me or call me a 'useless whore' like Dad was apt to do.
'Look. I know it's messed up…' He started between moans and pants, looking a bit sheepish. 'I didn't mean to make you feel you had no choice… or that other stuff jus' now…'
I leaned back, looking quizzically at him. 'Just beating ya to it, bro, before ya can force me. Or decide that ya can't resist anymore and fuck me anyway.'
'I would never...'
'Look, don't worry. Ya would have done this sooner or later anyway.' I got back to work. Part of me wanted it to be over as quickly as possible even though I enjoyed pleasing him and being praised. He must have sensed that.
He seemed relieved that I did but his moaning was changing somehow. Horrified, I heard something akin to sobs even as he shuddered and moaned as I looked up at him. Yep, big, bad ole Merle had tears in his eyes even as he tilted his head back. I'd never seen my big brother cry, not even when Mama died. Just one more point of no return was passed today. His fingers stroked my hair softly, as he shook his head.
'I don't ever want to hear ya talkin' like that again, baby brother. Not ever...' He managed to pant and half-sob out.
It had hurt him that I thought he would have forced me eventually. Not convinced however, I kept going but I wanted to believe him with all of my heart. But it was easier said than done. He wasn't complaining about me continuing, and the tears were gone just like that, replaced with an expression of raw lust again.
'Keep on doin' that. Not long now.' His hips made a few last jerks and he come into my mouth. 'Told ya it would be fun doin' it in front of him, huh? While he can't move.' He brayed like an ass. He took in my questioning eyes, so used to being told to swallow and get hell for it if I didn't do as told I couldn't help but be confused again. His expression softened and he shook his head as if he'd read my mind in that weird telepathic way we had.
'Ya don't have to swallow. Spit it out somewhere if ya like.'
He didn't need to tell me twice as I grabbed a glass and spat him out into it. He frowned but said nothing.
Then, I guessed he was getting the munchies with his drugs comedown because he turned and went into the kitchen. I heard him rustling something out of the fridge.
I blanched and gagged. How can you eat at a time like this? I thought over to him.
Then, I recalled that sex always made him hungry, the randy asshole. I heard him fix his plate of food and start to go upstairs.
I looked at our comatose Dad and even though he was restrained, I suddenly didn't want to be alone with him.
'Merle? Can ya come back?' I cringed.
He was back in a shot with a plate piled high with hotdogs. 'You OK? Want one?' He motioned the plate to me and my stomach churned.
I shook my head at him in disbelief.
'What? Ya don't want to eat in front of him? He can't do nothin' to ya now.'
'Jus' ain't hungry…'
'What ya gonna do with my cum?' He asked when he saw the glass in my hand. I looked at it in surprise because I didn't even recall picking it up.
'Do ya like to spit or swallow, ya sick fuck?' I mocked my comatose father while Merle rolled about on the floor, spitting out chunks of bun and 'dog all over the floor with his sides splitting in laughter. I felt pretty good about this little bit of revenge. For being able to fight back for once.
'Yeah, that's right little brother. You show him.'
Without looking at him further, I poured my brother's fluid down our Dad's open mouth while Merle stood behind me, gobbling another 'dog and guffawing. With a snap of satisfaction, I pinched his nose then closed his mouth, forcing him to swallow. I even tilted his face up to help him while all the time expecting him to wake up suddenly, grab me even though restrained (a weird thought) and punish me brutally. Still, I felt a little safer with Merle there. Maybe I was hoping that he'd choke on my brother in his sleep as I sneered down at him, my scornful laughter matching Merle's who had stood back up and was gobbling his food like there was no tomorrow.
'I hate you!' I gave my father one final kick for good measure. His head was bleeding again and I looked down in satisfaction at the bruises standing out on his face and all over his lower body and stomach. It felt good giving back a little bit of what he'd always dished out to me since I was so small, I didn't remember.
Merle clapped after I'd finished and offered me a 'dog from his plate again after we both recovered. I shook my head in disgust, unable to believe that he could just stand there and eat while I did that.
'Better move this sack of shit outside so he can't cause trouble when he wakes up.' It was Merle who suggested this after we both got our breath back.
I nodded in agreement and after we heaved him into the toolshed, we locked the door behind us without looking back.
Daryl
I suddenly felt sick and fisted my pant legs, as I felt the blood drain from my face as soon as we got back inside. Merle grasped my arm in concern and looked at me.
'Ya okay?'
I nauseously shook my head, feeling the spit gather in my mouth. He grimaced. 'Don't tell me ya feelin' guilty now…'
'No! 'Course not!'. I shook him off almost angrily. I just had to get out of there.
I ran towards the bathroom, only making it just in time and emptied what was in my stomach in mere seconds over the bowel. When it stopped, I found that I couldn't move. Now I realized that it was delayed shock mixed with happiness at finally being free of him as I trembled with exhaustion, fear, sadness and joy – feeling all of these emotions at once.
Part of my mind couldn't fathom that it was really over or thought that I was dreaming. Or that it was all some cruel trick the bastard was playing on me.
I was finally FREE! Or so I thought. How was I to know that it wouldn't be that easy?
That's how Merle found me about ten minutes later. Hunched over the toilet with my forehead resting against my arms.
'Hey...feeling any better?'
I didn't need to answer him, I guess my trembling gave me away.
Instead of feeling alarmed when he put one hand on my shoulder, I felt safe.
'Hey, come on, let's get ya into that shower, huh? You're burning up. Did ya take some of my stash while you were spikin' that bastard's beers? Not that I blame ya. Come on.'
'Some. Jus' to…' I nodded, tried to get to my feet and was suddenly forced to lean on him as a new wave of nausea and dizziness swept over me. I clung weakly to his arm like my life depended on it. He didn't comment at this, just gently pushed me under the lukewarm spray of water and rubbed the top of my arms. 'Ya jus' gotta breathe, it's jus' a reaction from the drugs and everythin', no worries. You'll be ok.'
'Merle, I…'
'Shh, talk later, little brother. Now ya just need to focus on gettin' ya body back under control. Bet that little heart of yours is thumpin' like a jackhammer in there, huh?' He traced a finger slowly down my chest, stopping reluctantly just short of my navel. 'Ya so hot, baby, - I mean that in both senses of the word.' He whispered in awe.
Ironically, I shivered and he chuckled, swiping his lips over mine.
He held me closer. 'I'm here, little brother, and I promise I ain't ever gonna leave ya again – not to deal with that waste of space all on your own. It's OK.' He brushed some of the hair away from my eyes and added low with obvious pain in his voice, 'I'm gonna make everythin' better. Hell knows a lifetime ain't gonna be enough to make it up to you.'
I shivered because I'd never seen my brother so serious and display such genuine emotion about anyone or anything except maybe me. Then I looked away because I knew exactly what he was getting at. What Dad made us do. And the other stuff just hovering beneath which neither of us were saying.
Still, what he was saying was simply overwhelming not to mention the badass reaction of my body. I could feel my pulse and heart rate working in overdrive. I let out a wail of distress, desperately holding on to him to just feel something familiar. He let the water almost run cold, but with him holding me, I didn't even mind in that moment.
We just stood there, neither of us wanting let go. We both needed this. Uncomplicated brotherly support.
'That's right, I got ya. You should know how many times I've been through this. Takin' too much shit. Doin' all kinds of crazy shit to cool down and make everythin' stop.'
'Like what?' Despite myself, I was curious. Anyway, him telling me would take my mind off my crazy body's reactions.
He smiled at that because it was all so typical. Just like the old days. Me always curious about everything he did and didn't do. Like before all of this. Feeling uncertain about what we would be to each other after all of this despite his promises, I was ready to cling to any word or gesture from him that could still reassure me.
Merle nudged me then, noticing I was in a dark place, 'One time, I stuck my head in the freezer, butt naked. Imagine what that must've looked like, huh?' I felt my body start to relax at the image and I giggled, resting my head against the crook of his neck.
'I know, just crazy, huh? The week after that, I decided to take a late-night swim in the lake not far from here. Ya know the one, with that trampoline and all that shit?' I nodded, becoming calmer by the second from listening to his voice.
'That was in the middle of January, the water was jus' freezin'. I was bouncin' sky-high on that damn trampoline, doing all kinds of tricks in the air before I hit the water. Kept going too, even though I knew that all that it would take for me to drown could be one bad jump and hittin' my head on the bottom.'
I laughed against his chest at that, seeing him doing all of this with no problem at all.
He chuckled at my inability to stop myself from laughing and I heard his chest rumbling close to my ear. 'Ate all kinds of crazy shit when I got the munchies, not from meth though – it takes away ya appetite. That shit is pretty potent if ya want to lose weight. Not that either of us need to go on a diet. Ha, ha.'
'Keep talkin'.' I ordered him.
'Ya know, I'm really enjoying this, just like old times. Me tellin' ya stories about ya crazy big brother, huh?' His tone had changed dramatically and it had an unexpected effect on me.
The voice he used to utter the last sentence, - slightly lower and softer – made me shiver and to my complete horror - my dick jerked. He didn't seem to notice even though he was standing pretty damn close. Or maybe he did, but he pretended he didn't see.
'You always liked it when I told ya stories about the stupid shit I got up to when I was high. Ya know, I'm sorry for not doin' somethin' about…'
'Don't talk about Dad. Anything but that sick fuck. Talk about anything but these last few days.'
'I need to talk about it too, ya know?' I stared at him. 'Talking about it' was not something Dixons did.
'I know, but not now. I need something to smile about. Make me forget for a while.'
He smiled down at me. 'Maybe I can help ya do that.' He winked at me.
'How ya gonna do that?' I smiled up at him with wide, big blue eyes. The innocent little brother.
He grinned. 'Ya know…' He looked down pointedly at my body and I blushed, feeling hot again but for very different reasons. 'Let me pay ya back, prove to ya that I'm a giver and not jus' a taker.'
I nodded eagerly, barely able to contain my excitement. I remembered the last time. He kissed me first and I kissed him back just as greedily – turned out he needed to be close to me as well after everything we'd just gone through. Finally, he pulled away and I got myself ready for him to just use his hand on me. Even that was enough to excite me – I remembered the first time with him in the shower.
But he didn't.
Hell knows why his mouth on me for the first time seemed like such a big deal after everything we'd done.
In time his hands all over me got rougher, resembling Dad's but it didn't scare me like with him and I liked it! Especially as the movements and suction of his expert mouth and the flicks of his tongue got faster and faster. Out of habit I guess, I bit the inside of my cheeks to try and stop a single sound from escaping me.
That made him pause and reach up and lightly slap the side of my head and stop, drawing out a deep groan of disappointment from me. 'Don't hold back,'. He said. 'This is your moment. I wanna hear ya. And I want that sick fuck out there to hear what I'm doin' to ya.'Then, he got back to work on me.
That got me going. Now I let out my moans in full volume. Not worried that it might wake up the bastard outside or maybe, perversely, hoping it would. While I could feel my big brother's enjoyment of my enjoyment and his smug satisfaction each time, he heard me gasp or scream. Somehow, we were more intimate than when I'd let him deep inside me.
I let out moans in full volume that I had been holding back before that. Maybe I even exaggerated a little, who cares? Not worried that it might wake up the bastard in the shed outside or perversely, maybe hoping it would. While Merle's eyes glazed over with his lust and self-satisfaction as he watched me enjoying myself.
He caught me as I screamed out my climax and sagged to the tiles. I was simply unable to move afterwards.
Grinning, he picked me up, wrapped me in a towel and deposited me on his bed.
'That's jus' the beginning of me making it up to you.' He smiled down at me warmly with a glint in his eyes before he started to gently tug my towel off and unwrap me like a Christmas gift. But he still made sure to catch my eye first.
I nodded. 'Yes, Merle. I want to. And I want him to hear us.' I giggled in excitement and drew him on top of me.
'Good boy.' He ruffled my hair, looking happy, melting my heart. I wondered if he had ever looked like this with any of his hundreds of girlfriends.
I didn't think so.
