A/N-
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DISCLAIMER- I OWN NOTHING AT ALL.
'ITALICS'- THOUGHTS
'BOLD'- POWERFUL BEING/JUTSU
'Okay, okay, CALM DOWN!'
Naruto thought to himself while shaking his little head from side to side. He had freaked out the moment Tsunade had walked in and did the only thing he could think of doing; he cried. It had taken Tsunade about 15 minutes to calm him down, but the only difference that made was that Naruto was now silently freaking out. Eventually, he remembered his shinobi training, and seeing that he wasn't in immediate danger, he closed his eyes and started meditating as a way to take stock of his situation. To Tsunade, however, this looked like he was sleeping, so she left him alone.
Reaching into his mindscape, he was relieved to find that he was in his adult form, at the climax of the war. He was expecting the usual sewer and ominous cage of Kurama. But what greeted him, was anything but. He now stood in a pleasant meadow and was looking at a house. It was a two-story house, which belonged to his parents.
'Wait, how did I know that?'
Chalking it up to yet another unknown variable of his current circumstances, he walked towards the house. He saw a couple of rabbits hopping away in the distance, which was strange. He didn't have any particular affinity towards rabbits, so why did he subconsciously think them up? He would have understood foxes, but rabbits? Hmm, a mystery indeed. But it had to be him, didn't it? After all, who else-
Kaguya
'She's here, she's sealed in me, she's hereherehereherehere…'
Naruto panicked as he thought over his next course of action. She was here. The woman responsible for all the suffering of the Ninja world was here. But she was sealed, wasn't she? She must be, Naruto reasoned. The Shinigami had said so, after all.
So, Naruto steeled himself and opened the door to the house. He walked in, slowly, towards the sitting area, where he felt her familiar presence. Naruto gulped. This was quite possibly going to be the most intense meeting in his life. The blonde was expecting a lot of things; Anger, hatred towards him for sealing her again, Despair, threats to annihilate the Shinobi world, and so on. Expecting to be hated, cursed and reviled for his actions, even though he was probably just as clueless as she was.
Preparing for the worst, Naruto turned the corner and went into the living room.
He was expecting a lot of things.
He most certainly was NOT expecting a drunk woman with a bottle of sake in her hand, passed out under the Kotatsu.
The only thing he could see was her face, which was poking out from under the blankets. Her head was tilted to the side, and she was drooling a bit at the mouth, while smiling a dopey grin. If Naruto didn't know this woman already, he would've maybe found her cute. She had her third eye closed as well, and her horns had turned into... Bunny-ears?
The blond blinked. Once. Twice. The blonde rubbed his eyes, to make sure he wasn't seeing things. Was THIS the Mother of all Chakra, the Rabbit goddess Kaguya Ōtsutsuki? Settling into a relaxed but still guarded stance, he approached the sleeping woman, ready for any attack. Crouching near her, Naruto was about to reach out and wake her up, when he heard her muttering something. Leaning closer, he heard-
'Nooooo, not my sake, Kaguya-sama needs her sake, Naruto-kun… hihihihihi'
Shaking his head and schooling his expression, Naruto shook her awake. He decided to get some petty vengeance for all the grief this woman had caused him. At the top of his voice, he shouted.
"OI OLD HAG, WAKE UP TTEBAYO! NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO BE SLEEPING LIKE A SLOTH!"
Kaguya jerked awake, snorting a bit from the shock. She groggily got up, and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. Naruto idly noted that she was wearing the same attire she wore when they fought. She blinked, looked around the room, until her eyes finally settled on Naruto. Her eyes narrowed, then widened, and a host of emotions flickered across her face faster than the blonde could detect them.
She finally settled on happiness and glomped Naruto.
"Na-Kyun!"
'What kind of cutesy name is that, Oi?' Naruto thought in alarm as he fought to get the Goddess away from him. He pushed her away, ignoring her look of surprise and disappointment. He needed answers, now. With his patented HokageFace™(He was going to use it when he made Hokage.) he glared at her and spoke in his most serious voice.
"Explain."
Instantly, Kaguya became serious as well and told him all that she knew.
"Well, we've time travelled to just after Tsunade and the others became Sannin. I know these names because our minds are linked. I'm actually not evil, and Zetsu was controlling me like he tried to do to you, and yes, these are bunny-ears."
Taking in all this information, Naruto did the only reasonable thing that came to mind; he passed out.
He woke up after god knows how long, to find Kaguya sipping her sake under the Kotatsu again. Only this time, he was under the Kotatsu as well. Sighing in relief, he thought,
'Good, she didn't kill me in my sleep, that lends credibility to her whole 'I'm not evil' story.'
Getting up, he addressed the elephant in the room. He walked up to Kaguya and raised his clenched fist towards her. When she looked at him quizzically, he said, "I already went through this with Kurama, so let's not do that dance again." He wanted to use Ninshu to get this over with.
Kaguya looked like she didn't understand, but bumped his fist anyway. And just like that, Naruto's worldview shattered.
'She's telling the truth' He thought in dismay and realization. 'Everything I knew was a lie, the war, her motives, everything.' he sulked. Having more experience with getting god-like entities being sealed into him than is normal, he asked,
"Well, you are telling the truth, how about we work together then? I mean, we are going to be stuck together for eternity after all." he offered with a smile.
Kaguya's eyes lit up "I knew you were smarter than these monkeys, Na-Kyun! And I would love to work together with you! I am just as much of a victim in this as you are, after all. Don't worry about a thing, I will take care of you!" She declared happily while holding her cheeks and swaying from side to side.
All throughout her speech, Naruto had a steady sweatdrop building up at the back of his head. In the flattest voice he could muster, he asked.
"Is this some kind of crappy anime or what? This is honestly too much. We have the drunk Onee-san trope, in addition to you being a bunny-girl, PLUS the whole 'I was being controlled all along' backstory. Are you sure you're not secretly in love with me because 'You saw my life and were inspired by how I would do anything for my precious people?' Because that would make perfect sense." he deadpanned. This was far too convenient in his opinion.
Kaguya looked positively affronted, as if what he'd said was an insult. She glared-pouted at him, and replied "How mean, Na-Kyun! Even I'm not that clichéd. I'm definitely not in love with you. Besides, you're too young for me, pyon."
'You don't say' Naruto thought in deadpan. 'Would've had more of an impact without the 'Pyon' at the end.'
"Anyway, Kaguya, I'm going to go out of my mind now and look around in the real world. If what you say is true, I have a family now, and I would like to enjoy this second chance I've given."
She nodded while still sipping her drink. "Okay Na-Kyun, have fun!" she waved at him "If you need my power, just call on it, though I doubt how much your body can handle at the moment."
Throughout her tirade, Naruto had been steadily backing away in fear, until he simply went out of her mindscape, cutting her out.
He found himself back in his bed, and the clock showed that about 1 minute had passed.
'Good, at least time works the same way it did before.' he thought in relief. While opening a telepathic link, he thought 'Now let's see about communication.'
"Hi baby-Ruto, how are you?"
'Not going down that rabbit(why?)-hole anytime soon.' Naruto thought while cutting off Kaguya.
'Let's see, childhood number two. I still have a chakra entity sealed inside me, born again to someone of Uzumaki descent, still blonde, and I still have my whisker marks . But I don't have Kurama, maybe?' He mused.
'Where is the furball anyway? I'll have to check.' Then Naruto shook his head, returning to the topic. 'But most of all, I have a family now. I'm Naruto Senju!' He thought with pride.
'I wonder if I can steal the Hokage seat from my dad?' He wondered while cackling madly.
The leaf was about to be reintroduced to the most unpredictable Ninja.
A/N- I know its clichéd, that's the point.
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