AN- Hi! I'm sorry that this chapter has taken such a long time. A lot of not so great things have been happening these past months and it's been a struggle, but I want to thank everyone who comments, no matter what they always make me smile so thank you. Thank you to anyone who has returned to read this chapter too. I think this chapter is messy as I wrote it very slowly in small fragments and I did my best whenever my two brain cells felt up to being creative. You are all wonderful, thank you for being here.

The rest of her meal with Mori gradually became easier, Haruhi found herself listening to him prattle on about things, a shocking amount of things. She really knew so little about him. It was hard not to beat herself up about it a little bit, maybe if she spent more time with him or anyone else she wouldn't be so upset. She felt okay right now, getting lost in simple small talk felt natural with him. It was still a little bizarre to hear him speak more than a few words every once and awhile, but she was grateful that Mori was so willing to try and help her. Some part of her couldn't help but to think he was putting on a show because he pitied her. She'd like to think better of him, the person who jumped off the bridge behind her, the person who said he wanted to be there for her. It was strange to hear those words or even to just recall him saying it. No one had ever spoken to her like that before, maybe her dad, but that's kind of his job.

After their meal Mori suggested that they get groceries or at least a few food supplies. The overall experience of just the two of them trying to buy food for the host club members was not great. They both just seemed to fling things into the cart and after a small realization, thanks to Mori's snooping earlier this morning, they also needed cookware. Two shopping sprees, a small playful argument about getting all of their goods home and taxi ride later they stood in a their fully stocked kitchen.

"I guess we should make dinner, do you know when any of them will be home?" She'd turn to him watching him shrug. "Well is there anything you want?" She'd follow up quickly, moving to the sink to wash her hands.

"A stew sounds nice. " he'd respond softly, Takashi's eyes peering past her to the window being prattled on by the still coming rain. He'd flush a little, it was strange to ask for a meal when most of the time maids would just bring him trays upon trays of delicacies made by five star chefs. The thought of having a home cooked by Haruhi would be the best way this day could end. He felt better about her, about how she was currently feeling and about their own relationship. It was a start, but he felt greedy. He wanted more of this. More days of just the two of them, where he didn't have to compete for her attention. Takashi may have been out of the picture but the twins could be just as distracting.

"Mm.. Yeah it is that kind of day. '' she'd speak softly while drying her hands. "Plus we can make rice and pour it over the stew. '' Haruhi would add, seeming pretty excited, she'd get to work right away. The sound of chopping soon filled the quiet space between them. No words needed to be spoken as ingredients were added to a large pot of warming broth. They would steal glances at each other as secretly as possible. Haruhi wondered if he had cooked before while judging his slow and steady carrot slicing, but maybe her side eying was a little more than backseat cooking. Somewhere in the back of her head she felt as though she needed to make sure he was still there.

Takashi on the other hand was a little more invested in the veggies he was working on. Sure his eyes would sneak over to her, but he wanted to impress her with his non-existent cooking skills. At least try to seem competent in the kitchen, like her. It was a little strange to him, he felt okay in most things and cutting away at something seemed like an easy task, but he still wanted to look good in front of her. Impress her maybe?

"Looks like we had a busy day. '' A voice rang out from behind them, Haruhi, completely lost in her own head couldn't help but to basically jump out of her skin. With a soft gasp her body would flinch away from the unexpected noise and the knife in her hand slipped right through her shocked little fingers. Startled by her own dumb action of dropping a knife she was quick to force her feet back as quickly as possible. The knife clattered to the ground, Kyoya who had just arrived stood motionless a few feet away from the crime scene he had caused. Just as he was about to spring into action to run to her aid, Mori was already there, blanketing her small frame to peak at her fingers and toes.

"Did it cut you?" He'd ask quickly and a little too loudly. Her wide eyes looked up to him while she let out a calming soft breath. To his surprise she'd start to smile a little, her body easily relaxing as she'd give him a gentle pat at his upper chest.

"That was a close one. '' she'd say through a playful scoff, chuckling just a little. "I'm okay.. was really in the zone.." she'd mumble tilting her head to Kyoya who seemed frozen in place, his expression hard and cold. It almost frightened her. "Someone needs to wear a bell" She was doing her best to play off the accident. Plus, really it was a little funny. A good jump scare every once and awhile was harmless.

Biting his tongue, Kyoya couldn't look away from Mori, the way he was looking at her.. jealousy was an ugly emotion, but he was more or less mad at himself. After they arrived at the hotel, he called a meeting while she slept. He told her he wouldn't let her be alone, but he had business here to take care of and after a long conversation about how the twins may have been too brash for her to handle after the bridge incident someone else should probably take care of her for the evening. They all agreed Mori's quiet demeaner would be easier for her to digest today, but he looked like a predator eyeing down his prey right now and she looked back at him so.. so longingly. Why didn't she look at him like that? A half day with her and Mori was already swooping in and he invited him to do so. Stupid. "I'm sorry. I'll make a much more exciting entrance next time. " he'd say in an indifferent tone, trying to keep his cool. His fingers would reach up and adjust his glasses. "Do you need anymore help in the kitchen?" He'd add, his hands moving down to his tie, pulling on the loop to loosen it from his neck while he walked into the kitchen.

"I don't think so Senpai, just gotta let it cook now. " she'd turn to the fully diced ingredients sitting on the cutting boards. Without saying anything Mori would just nod, picking up the board he had been working on and simply dumped it into the boiling pot, moving to the side to allow her to do the same.

"Alright. " he'd mumble, backing away, now fully tie free, he'd start on the upper buttons of his dress shirt, stopping three down to let his neck breath. "How are you feeling?"

Haruhi froze over the pot, watching the last of the meat plop in. She had to hold her breath, not wanting to be asked this again. She was better. It was easier when she didn't think about it all, but now she was again. What was she to say? Did he want a physical check up or something more like Mori? "I'm okay. Sore still. How was your day?" She'd speed through her words, while placing the lid on the pot.

"Long" his response was fast and exasperated. He didn't want to get into his new position with his family business just yet. He was able to keep the company in his family's hands, but he didn't trust them not to screw it up again. He'd take it upon himself to be a part of important matters and no one else had much of a choice as he owned a huge chunk of the company now. He had managed to win his game, he won the company. Managing it would be its own game, but a new challenge was consuming him. It was foolish to think he'd be the only person playing for her, but he wouldn't be surprised if most of them had suppressed their feelings for Tamaki. He'd have to start bringing more tact to the battlefield if he were to contest. Not 'if'. He wanted to, he felt like he needed to. Needed to win.

Haruhi was about to respond, but she could see Hikaru and Karu walk through the door, their hands full of shopping bags. Kyoya would turn to watch them enter and Mori was quick to move in closer, greeting Honey, who was clearly coming down from a sugar high. His small hands rubbed under his eyes in an attempt to fight off the oncoming nap. Mori would sigh just a little, being cut off by Haruhi before he could say anything.

"Looks like everyone had a long day. Let's all relax and get cleaned up and dinner should be done in an hour or two. " she'd give them all a slight smile, but would make her way down the hallway to her room pretty quickly. She needed some space. Some quiet. Today had been nice, but everyone in one room didn't sound very fun right now. She felt like she was under a microscope, Mori being way too nice to her and even Kyoya was eyeing her down like a wounded animal. She'd shudder a little as she had flashbacks of his gaze.

She'd pull out one of the books from her secondary overnight bag and sat herself against the bed frame. Pulling the book up she'd start to read, but couldn't really bring herself to pay attention to the words. After rereading the same opening paragraph multiple times she'd huff and look to the windows. They were still blanketed by the curtains, but she could still hear the rain drumming against the glass. She tried to picture herself splashing around in the puddles like a child, between her parents and her tiny hands being held by both of them. A knock at the door would soon startle her out of her daydream and she had no idea how long she let herself stay in that memory for. Jerking her head to the door, she'd call out "You can come in. ". Kyoya slipped in, a towel wrapped around his shoulders and the suit he had on before was replaced by sweat clothes. They were obviously pajamas, but it felt so strange to see him dressed down so much and she couldn't help but to gawk a little at him.

"Can I sit?" He'd mumble while taking the towel to his hair to rub away moisture. She'd nod, pausing to look at the book for a split second before shutting it just a little too loudly and tossing it to the side of her. Kyoya took a seat on the end of the bed, twisting his body to look at her. She could tell he had something to say from the way he was looking at her. Once the silence between them seemed far too long Haruhi started to speak, but he'd quickly raise his hand to stop her. "I'm sorry. I wanted to talk, but I can't seem to find the words. ``he'd watch her eyebrows furrow as she'd take a moment to look around the room.

"Well.. is this your vacation home?" She'd quickly speak, catching him off guard just a little. This isn't what he wanted to talk about, not even in the same ballpark.

"Are you assuming that because everything around here is black and grey and bland?" He'd respond with a little bit of suspicion hidden in his voice.

"No. " she was quick to answer at first, but she wasn't fully sure how to word what she meant. "It's just.. it's very modern and I feel like you'd enjoy this kind of.. of style?'' Her expression would change to a questioning one, looking to see if her theory was correct.

Kyoya couldn't help but to smile a little, he did enjoy simple and sleek designs with easy to digest colour palettes, but that's not why they were here. In fact his smile was more for her then him, he found it cute that she couldn't remember why they chose this place even though she was the main reason they were here. He couldn't imagine having such a low tolerance to anything, god forbid she even partake in liquor. "Do you not remember why we came here? I'm not surprised you were pretty out of it. You were a little in and out, but at one point up told me you didn't want to be alone. So I asked the others if they wanted a vacation in an attempt to help you. When we were picking where to go you kept insisting on not going somewhere 'sleepy' and or 'quiet'. When I mentioned that wherever we went I'd have to come in a day late due to my business meeting you then insisted we all go to where I'm going. None of us own any real estate in business districts, most of the time we only come here to do, well.. Business. So we avoid staying here for fun and ours or whichever company we are meeting with will pay for a hotel room. So I had to do some last minute arrangement and find a suitable place to rent for all of us. This was the best I could do. " Haruhi would open her mouth, an embarrassed expression painted her face, but Kyoya's hand quickly went up again, motioning for her to stop once more. "I don't want you to feel bad. You didn't do anything, truthfully.." He'd trail off, shifting his body forward on the bed, mostly trying to look away from her. His eyes would settle on the floor while he'd shift his elbows onto his thighs, leaning down to let his head rest in the palm of his hand.

"To be honest, I personally didn't want to be alone either." He'd start speaking again in a lower tone. The first time I met Suho was in this district. Our fathers had some kind of a meeting and we both didn't know he had a son until he insisted that my dad bring me along. His Japanese was broken at best, he had just come from Paris and looked hopeless. Even as I child I knew there was something wrong. He wasn't happy then and we had only spent a few hours at a restaurant's table together. It wasn't until we were much older that we met again, both of us in our early teen years. He acted like we had always been close friends and as a business man I did my best to be appeasing. I thought he was also playing nice, but after just a few days of listening to his endless babble it was clear that he wasn't interested in anything that I was. It was easy to connect with him, we stood in the same world, but were walking a different path. I was jealous of him really, he just wanted to be happy, make other people happy. I wanted to crush my family." He'd pause to let out an airy chuckle, only briefly reflecting on how dark his life goal had really been. Kyoya tilted his head in her direction, he was unaware that she had scooted closer to him, her eyes staring him down. Haruhi was obviously hanging off of every word he was saying. He was grateful, he rarely spoke about these sorts of things and when he did, it was to Tamaki. "I guess I can't stop thinking about him and sure I'm pissed that he left in the manner he did, but I thought we were friends. I thought he'd at least tell me something."

He'd turn his face away from her again, but he could feel the bed shift as she'd sit next to him, her hand moving to rest on his shoulder. "I can't stop thinking about him either." She'd whisper to him, a hint of blush forming across her face. It was the first time she had said it aloud, but it felt good to get it off her chest. It felt good to know someone else was struggling with the same thing. Kyoya deserved much more of Tamaki's attention then she did. She hardly knew him as long as they knew each other. It made her feel small, their relationship was special, but technically gone. Just like hers'. "You can always talk to me like you used to talk to him." She'd add, still whispering.

A soft appreciative smile would turn the corners of his mouth as he'd look back to her. He'd sigh, placing his hand on top of hers, though his palm would lay rather stiffly against her knuckles. He wasn't uncomfortable to touch her, in a way it just felt taboo to have any intimate act with her. To be fair any kind of gesture like this was foreign to him, but she was willing to reach out to him, so he should be able to hold on. Right? "It's good to hear something like that sometimes. " he'd mummer, not fully aware he said it aloud. "I know my future looks a little different without Soho, but I'm glad you're still here and I'm here for you too. "

With a slight nod of appreciation they both soon fell into a silence, both of them lost in the made up futures they had once felt could truly have happened. Kyoya thought his best friend would be here for moments like this, when he was feeling on top of the world and still hungry for more. Someone to stand by him and listen to his business jargon and in return he'd hear tales of a normal life. The simple woes of a man who based his life off of the simplicity of family raising.

Haruhi's thoughts were unfortunately not as gentle, something had finally clicked in her, something she had never fully admitted to herself. The future she had dreamed of, but never fully leaned into. The one where she had finished college, was a hard working lawyer and HE was somehow always next to her. Holding her hand, congratulating her, making her feel special and telling her that HE loved her. It was easy for her to put those kinds of feelings on the back burner, she had the opportunity of a lifetime at Ouran, school would always be her priority. How could she waste her time on boys, when she already put so much time into the host club. Not to mention the housework too. How could she responsibly juggle all of those things and foster a relationship like that. A Pressure started to swell inside of her, it was an intense feeling, the feelings of dread and if she were standing she was sure she'd be on her knees by now. It was so obvious to her, HE had given her so many chances, always there, always trying and all she did was push. Push. Push. No wonder he left. She was awful. Closed off. Only worried about herself and her future. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Her thoughts surged, she could feel them building in so many directions. It wasn't her fault. It was her fault. Everyone should understand her priorities, after all she was a poor commoner. A poor commoner who stupidly ignored the person who made her happy. HE left. Not my fault. I should have done something better. Her voice repeated that phrase in what seemed like an endless loop. It was loud. It was deafening. It was hard to swallow. To hold down.

Kyoya flinched a little, the sound of.. Well he wasn't really sure, perhaps gasping would be the best way to describe it.. Regardless it caught him off guard. He turned his head only to be met with something he wasn't ready for. Haruhi sat stiff as a board, her head down and very obviously balling her eyes out. Coming in here and speaking openly with her was a strategic move of sorts, a show of trust and solidarity. Everything he talked about and his feelings were true, he wouldn't lie to her, but it was a predetermined move. He had hoped this would simply show her that he trusted her and hoped she would open up to him as well, but instead he made her cry? Whatever happened within their silence was not planned for. He had no idea how to properly respond to this situation. He hadn't even thought that this would be a possible outcome for this talk.

He'd cringe a little, acting as though his relationship with her was some kind of alien puzzle that needed extreme strategies. Haruhi was a person, not some business mogul that needed to be danced around and sweet talked until he could play all of his cards to get what he wanted. She was just herself, his friend, someone he cared about more than he'd like to admit and he's trying to play mind games and one up his possible competition. All he did was make her cry. All he wants to do right now is make it stop, how could he not want it to stop? His heart ached for her. He could handle his host club girls just fine, but he has no idea how to handle this one at all. Then again Haru wasn't what he'd consider an average girl. What would be best for her?

Blinking hard, autoPilot seemed to kick in for Kyoya. His body shifted to fully face her, his left hand reached gently for her chin, pulling her gaze to his. His right hand moved across her forehead, pushing back her slightly tear soaked bangs and once he was satisfied with their shared eye contact both of his hands slid around her face, holding her face in his cupped palms. He had never truly realized how small her face was until now. "Why are you crying? " he'd whisper gently. He'd watch as her eyes would grow wide in response, she was shocked. She hadn't registered at all that the storm raging inside of her had spilled out to the outside too.

Her words came out through heavy gasp, there were low and fast. "Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.." she wasn't truly aware of what was being said. Her body went on autopilot too and she was just letting it all happen. She wasn't even sure if she could stop it anymore at this point. Loud, her brain was loud and her body tingled, feeling like the air she had cut through when she had fallen off the bridge. Another sharp gasp came through, her eyes shut tight, she could feel the chill of the water. She was falling. Her body would jerk away from His'. Her breathing hard, she had to leave. She couldn't breath. She was drowning all over again.

Kyoya watched her helplessly as she was now pacing and.. panting around the room. He had never seen anything like this and it was obviously some kind of mental break, right? He was far from qualified to handle this. Should he get help? Should he call for medical help. Either way he clearly needed to do something. Haruhi was crumbling right in front of him. Hiding behind different masks all of his life in an attempt to get what he wanted was easy. He could reject himself from people and their well-being. He had no persona or yes man alter ego that could hustle his way into making her feel better.. Or even just calm her down. It was off-putting for him, a hard pill to swallow, that his normal tactics to get everything he wanted wasn't going to be able to solve everything. At this moment he couldn't help but to feel overwhelmingly guilty as he sat there, useless and selfishly thinking about himself and his shortcomings instead of being useful.

He'd reach for her, in one swift movement their bodies awkwardly tangled together as he'd force her fidgeting body into his. Haru would fold into him, not so comfortably resting in his arms, somewhat sitting in his lap and her head nestled into his chest right under his chin. She could hear his heart beating in one ear and his chin rested lightly against the top of her head, she could hear his voice from the other ear. She had almost forgotten he was there, what they were even talking about. Everything felt fuzzy, wrong and seemingly gone from her recent memory. It was hard, to breathe, to remember where she was, why she was. All she knew is that she didn't want to be in her own skin anymore. Nothing felt right. She tried so hard to keep herself together. She could have powered through, she could have tried harder to at least, but she broke. She broke so fast. Everything felt so heavy. How could she ever exist again?

"Haru, you need to breath for me. " his voice was almost unfamiliar, warmer then she was used to, softer. Strange.

"Falling. " she'd whisper through her trembling lips, her hands now grabbing at him. Maybe a little too roughly. She could feel his head shaking, by the way his chin moved across her head.

"No, your here, with me. Sitting on a bed. Relaxing. '' he'd respond quickly, his jaw clenching slightly. He had no idea if he was helping or not. He had no idea what this experience was like for her, but clearly it affected her in ways she didn't let on. In a way it was frustrating, she could have said something, but obviously she shouldn't have to. Of course she wouldn't be okay after yesterday. He should have known better. Talked to her about it instead of forcing some contrived conversation about something that doesn't matter nearly as much as her.

"Here. With you. "She'd repeat back through heavy breathes as though she was trying to convince herself of the truth. Truth she already knew, but couldn't quite seem to accept.

"Yeah. '' he'd whisper in return. Kyoya Would then take in an exaggerated breath of air. It was loud and he'd force his chest to move with his breathes, watching as Haruhi would soon mimic him. He'd then breath out and she'd follow suit. The two of them would soon fall into a slight silence as they breathed in sync. He felt her body melting into his, going limp as she was calming down.

"I don't think your stupid..'' He'd whisper "I think you're one of the smartest people I know. Someone to admire really.. Hard working and kind. You didn't do anything wrong. Someone else wronged you-me-us.. I mean. Well I mean, you don't have to suffer in silence. I know that's rich coming from me, but I care about you and I know you've been through a lot, but I'll do what I can to help you. '' he'd pause to breathe out, he could feel his face growing warm and his arms bringing her closer to him. He just wanted to somehow squeeze and hold her until it all came flooding out. Every last ounce of pain that was hidden away. It would never be that simple, no matter how much he wished for it. "You just have to let me in Haruhi. I know I'v never been very warm toward you but-" He'd harshly suck in air, he wanted to say so much, but those feelings, those words held tight in his throat, feeling like razor blades lodged in his throat. Maybe, even for him it was too hard to admit it at all. How he just wanted what was best for his dearest friend. How awful would he truly have been if he 'stole' a woman away from a friend. If he was indifferent to her, she could be indifferent to him too. It was easier that way, but it was entirely too hard. She knew him best and could read him like a book. His cold exterior was never enough. So he threw himself into 'work' and it paid off. He technically got what he wanted, but.. It doesn't seem like it was what he wanted anymore.

"I-I would like to be better. A better friend you deserve. " he'd eventually mutter to her. She'd lay still in his arms, her lungs ached and her body felt awfully sore, but mostly just felt absolutely exhausted. She hated her body more than ever, breathing felt like a chore and her own brain felt fried and dead. She felt completely out of control and that in itself was hard to cope with, but now she had to fight off the nightmare that was drowning. She has to try and move on from what she thought was going to be her life, but it all just seems so hard. Too hard. She didn't want to deal with it. Just thinking about it made her tear up again, though she felt calm still, just sad.. There was too much to think about. Too many thoughts to juggle and no where to place them that made any sense. No place that would make her feel better.

"I don't know what to say." She'd whisper back "I just don't feel okay about anything.." Her voice groggy, it would waver just a little, causing Kyoya to place his hand on her cheek. It was a bit of shock, for her, but she was already haphazardly laying in his arms, maybe his lap, it was hard to tell so pressed into him, but it felt safe here. It felt good to just be held by someone, it was hard to deny that, even if it was by someone she thought might have hated her. Maybe he just had a hard time being nice or maybe all this change brought out his softer side. Either way, his hand was warm and she couldn't help but to lean into his palm just a little while closing her eyes.

"I'm sorry it's all so hard. "

"I'm just tired.." She'd add shortly and in one swift and slightly sloppy motion he'd do his best to lay her into the bed and pull the covers over her.

"Then get some rest, I'll be here in the next room over if you need anything. "