Disclaimer: I do not own That 70s Show


Chapter six:

ERIC

"Dude how do you manage to feed yourself here?" I heard Hyde's voice from the kitchen as I woke up.

My body is all sore, so I get up and try to stretch, I'm all alone in the living room, and I'm smelling bacon, the guys are probably in the kitchen having breakfast. I barely slept, I'm still jet-lagged and Fez snores. I head in the direction of their voices and I see Hyde on the stove, Kelso and Fez are sitting near the counter waiting patiently for their food.

"Man it's so nice to have people over, especially when they make you breakfast" Kelso grins as Hyde glares at him and places a plate of bacon and another plate of pancakes on the counter.

"I still can't believe that you have your own place, yet you still don't know how to cook your own breakfast" Hyde grabs a plate for himself

"Excuse me" Kelso sounds indignant "For your information, I know how to make my own food, I just don't know how not to set it on fire"

"Poor Kelso, there aren't enough fire extinguishers in the world to fix the damage it would cause if he tries to make his own breakfast every day" Fez sighed

"That's why they invented cereal, man!" Kelso laughs

"Oh crap" Hyde mumbles to himself as he started to eat his own food "I'm surrounded by morons"

"Hey!" I protest "Don't include me in your insult, I haven't even done anything yet!"

"The fact that you added 'yet' to your last sentence saddens me" Fez grins

Oh God, I'm actually going to have to spend the whole day with those 3 before I see Donna? I might as well jump from a window, I just hope Hyde brought enough 'film' to make this day go faster.

After breakfast, we all went back to the living room to hang out. I told the boys some of the stories about Africa, and they filled me in about everything that happened in Point Place while I was gone. Apparently, my parents have seriously considered moving to Florida with Bob, my mom hadn't even mentioned this to me, and honestly, thank God they came to their senses, because just the thought of Red living in a state full of tourists and alligators scared the crap out of me. Fez proudly told me that he's finally getting some, I was about to laugh at him but Hyde confirmed his story, somehow the little pervert managed to find a way of getting into a girl's pants. Other than that (and the girls leaving), Point Place is still pretty much the same.

Kelso confessed that working for the playboy mansion wasn't exactly as exciting as he thought it would be, he actually admitted that he missed being in the police and that if it weren't for Brooke and Betsy, he would've already moved back to Point Place.

Fez loved his job at the salon, according to him, the salon was the best place to pick up chicks, and it was very close to the candy store.

And Hyde… Hyde loved his store. He doesn't say this type of stuff out loud, but meeting his biological father was probably one of the best things he'd done in his life. Now he has a real family, and a job he really likes, thanks to Jackie. I'm pretty sure that if Jackie wasn't nagging him so much he would've never met WB. That's one of the reasons why the poor orphan boy needs his princess, she always pushes him in the right direction, and he knows that. As I was previously informed, Hyde spent most of his day working, when he was done, he drank a huge amount of beer, smoked a lot of film, and went to bed, only to repeat his routine the next day.

The more I think about life in Point Place, the more I remember that Donna never wanted that for herself. We always talked about getting the hell out of that town and creating a life for ourselves somewhere else. In a way, I'm glad Donna left, I really was holding her back, and I was a selfish asshole. She should've left for Madison when she had the chance, I'm pretty sure that we could've made this whole distance relationship work back then. Now I'm so incredibly fucked, I don't even know what the hell am I supposed to do.

Even if I manage to convince Donna to take me back, how exactly are we going to make this work? I start at UW in September, I still have plenty of time before I move to Madison, but I'll need to move eventually. Donna is in one of the best journalism programs in the country, she's not transferring to UW just to be with me, she shouldn't. At this moment I get what Jackie meant, I need to be the one making the sacrifices for a change, if I want to make this work, I'll need to make the sacrifices, I just don't have any idea of what I should do. The distance between Chicago and Madison is nothing compared to the distance between Africa and Wisconsin though, and I still have the cruiser, I'll figure something out, but I'm committed, we will make this work, I will make sure of it.

The rest of the day went pretty smoothly, we had a couple of circles, watched some TV, we took Fez on a walk (he was getting really uneasy at the small apartment), then we all got ready to meet the girls back at their place. Again, my throat feels dry and I'm getting pretty anxious, I don't even know if I'll be able to talk to Donna today, just seeing her was enough to make me feel butterflies in my stomach. Hyde looks pretty antsy as well, but he's hiding it all behind his sunglasses and his 'zen' crap.

We knock at the door and Donna answers, and I don't even know how she does that, but I swear that she manages to look more beautiful every day. She still had blonde hair, the roots were showing a bit of the original red, and she was wearing a blue sweater and a pair of jeans. She gestured to us to come in and we made ourselves comfortable in her living room. I notice that Hyde's eyes are roaming around the place, searching for his tiny brunette.

"Jackie's still at work but she'll be here in a few minutes," Donna said, "There's beer in the fridge" she pointed to the kitchen and took a sip of her own beer, I couldn't help but notice that she was glancing at me when she thought I wasn't looking. Maybe she isn't as over me as I thought. I grin slightly to myself, as I went to the kitchen and picked up 4 beers, one for each one of us. Imagine my surprise when I handed a beer to Mr. Steven Hyde and he shook his head, giving me the unopened can of beer back.

"No thanks man, I'll see if I can get a pop," he said as he went into the kitchen, leaving all of us completely dumbfounded by his behavior. If Hyde was refusing to drink beer, he must be really determined on getting Jackie back. He comes back with a bottle of pop and realizes we're all staring at him, he grimaced. "Shut up," he says and focuses his attention on one of the magazines sitting at the coffee table.

I look at everyone else and apparently they're just as shocked as I am, Kelso was wide-eyed and his mouth was hanging open as he stared at Hyde like he was a completely different person, Fez has pretty much the same expression as Kelso, and Donna was just staring suspiciously at him, but I can see a small grin on her face.

After a while, everyone just shrugged and directed their attention to something else, until we finally heard the noise of someone fiddling some keys and opening the door. Jackie was finally home, the night is about to get pretty interesting.


JACKIE

To say I was purposely arriving late at home would be an understatement. I took my time at work today, I checked the scripts at least five times, I made small talk to some of my colleagues, took the stairs instead of the elevator, I did everything I could to avoid the talk I knew was coming.

As I opened the door to my apartment I saw everyone in the living room, crap, they were actually waiting for me. And now they're all staring at me, including Donna.

"Never thought I would say this but can everyone please stop staring at me? I know I'm gorgeous but I'm starting to get uncomfortable" I say, and I see that Ste… no, Hyde, smiled softly at me and went back into reading one of Donna's magazines. I take off my coat and grab some water, after the hangover I had yesterday, there's no way I'm touching alcohol again. I sit on the arm of the couch and wait for someone to break the silence.

"Well, this is weird" God bless Fez, I chuckled a little "You can cut the sexual tension in here with a spoon" my smile disappeared, way to make this situation more uncomfortable Fez.

"Who the hell cuts stuff with a spoon?" Kelso looked confused at the perverted little foreign guy

"Fez" Donna was holding back a smile "It's a knife, 'you can cut the sexual tension in here with a knife'"

"See, Donna agrees with me!" Fez replied

"Oh God" I mumble, seriously, if things keep going like this, this is going to be the weirdest night of my life.

"You know what's going to make this situation a whole lot easier to deal with?" Ste... Hyde grinned and took a brown paper bag out of his jacket pocket, then he proceeded to remove his jacket, what the hell is wrong with me? He looks stronger, crap, I shouldn't be noticing this.

"Oh my God, I haven't done this since we left Point Place" Donna giggled, and everyone gathered around in a circle. I was still sitting in the arm of the couch, wondering if getting high next to my extremely hot ex is a good idea.

"Jacks?" Speak of the devil. He was looking at me expectantly, and I just sighed and took a seat between Donna and Fez.

Steven quickly rolled up a joint, and then another. And then another. I think it's pretty safe to say that we're all very high right now.

Eric is chuckling for no reason, then he turns to look at St… Hyde "Dude, how much 'film' have you brought? This is like, our fourth circle in 24 hours"

"Hey, I figured we might stay here for a while," He says, smiling to himself "This feels right"

"Why is there no food?" Fez complained, staring at Donna and me "A good host always has food!"

Donna starts to giggle uncontrollably "I forgot how fun this is" she stared at her hands "Wow, my hands are huge! Jackie, look at my hands!" And now she's waving her hands in front of my face, great

I start to laugh nervously, remembering the story Steven told me about Donna's first circle. Apparently, she punched Eric that day. I stare at her hands "If you let me paint your nails more often, it…" I pause, and take Donna's hands in mine, reflecting if a well-done manicure would really make her hands look smaller "Nah, if I painted your nails, your hands would still look huge, but at least they would be nicer to look at" I add with a condescending smile

Michael is smiling dumbly at everyone "See, this is what I was talking about!" He looked at me and Donna "Your presence was very missed at the circle, ladies"

"That's true" Eric confirmed "I've had like, five circles since I arrived in America, and you two were missed in all of them" he is staring at Donna now, who was still staring at her hands and laughing, he chuckled at the sight. He's making googly eyes at her and it's kind of cute.

"Man, that's the good shit, I have to ask Leo for more when we head back," Steven says

"I demand food!" Fez yells, and slapped the coffee table, startling everyone, and Steven glared at him, looking like he was going to hit him, Fez smiled apologetically "Sorry"

"Dude, why do you keep hitting on tables?" Michael asked

Donna's still giggling, she stopped staring at her hands to look at Fez "Jeez Fez, relax. Go grab some of Jackie's special ice cream in the freezer and I'll order us some food"

I freeze "Donna! Now I'll be all out of ice cream! Fez will eat the whole thing in seconds, you know I need my ice cream whenever I get sad!"

"Why do you need ice cream?" Michael asked me, before I could invent an excuse, realization hit him "Oooh, wait, I remember! You only like ice cream when you're depressed! Did you have ice cream when we broke up as well? Because I deserve some depression ice cream!"

I roll my eyes as Fez goes back to his spot with a spoon and a small container of moose tracks ice cream "Yummy" he smiled

"Kelso, I would like to congratulate you," Eric says, patting his friend back "You managed to make a circle uncomfortable, that's why you're the king"

"Hey, that's not completely true! I helped!" Donna says, laughing

"If I had the ability to be mad right now, I would kick some serious ass!" I say, trying to sound angry, but I really can't right now. Everything looks too damn funny, so I chuckled "But I don't, and now I'm dying for some food. Oh! I'll order us some Chinese!" I get up and go to the phone on the other side of the room, but I can still hear everyone

"Oh crap" I hear Steven muttering in a sad tone, and I feel a pang in my chest "Give me that damn ice cream"


A few hours had passed and the night wasn't going half as bad as I expected it would be. After the circle, I've ordered some food and now we are all playing monopoly, and of course, I am winning. St… Hyde looked at me sadly all night, but he hasn't tried to talk to me yet, I don't know if I should be annoyed or relieved. My thoughts are interrupted when I hear a loud thump. Crap, Fez flipped the board again. He always does that when he's losing.

"Seriously, Fez?" I ask

"This game is not fair!" He pouts, and I roll my eyes at him, I should've expected that the minute we started playing. As Donna, Michael and Eric were arguing with Fez, I stood up and headed to the kitchen to grab myself another glass of water. I see Ste… Hyde stood up as well, and I sighed, time for us to have that talk. I look briefly at Donna, who gives me an encouraging smile, and I head to my room, gesturing for Hyde to follow me.

I sit on my bed and he closes the door, I notice that he's glancing around my room, but soon he sits next to me in my bed. He furrowed his brow and took a deep breath, probably trying to figure out what he is going to say next. I feel him scooting closer to me, I stand up and sit in the chair close to my bed.

"Do I seriously disgust you that much?" He removes his sunglasses and looks sadly at me, crap, I can already feel my eyes watering, so I stare at my window.

"Just get it over with, Hyde" I mumbled

"Will you please stop calling me that?" He runs his hands in his face, he tends to do that when he's nervous.

"Fine, just say what you want to say"

He tries to grab my hand, but I pull away. He looked crushed by my gesture, but then he took another deep breath and I prepared myself for whatever he's about to say.

"Jackie, I will never, ever, be able to put into words how much I regret everything that happened in those last 6 months" I direct my gaze at him, but I don't say anything "I would take everything back if I could, believe me. And I know sorry isn't going to cut it this time, but I'm willing to do whatever it takes to have you in my life again"

I honestly don't know what to say. This must be killing him, because Steven never apologizes. The only time he apologized to me was right after he cheated on me. God, just remembering that day makes me want to crumble into a little ball and cry until I dehydrate. I know how hard this must be for him, but after everything that happened, I just can't feel sorry for him. I was the one who was dumped and replaced by a whore, I was the one who was thrown away like garbage. I, Jackie Burkhart, for the first time in my life, felt like I wasn't enough. He managed to destroy my confidence, my self-esteem, and it took me a long time to get those back.

"Is that all?" I ask him coldly "Because if you're done, I have some stuff I would like to say as well"

I take a deep breath and try to keep my composure, I am doing my best not to cry right now "You have no idea of how much you made me suffer. You put me through hell! I was with you for two years, and you only told me you loved me once! When I asked you for commitment, you told me you 'didn't know', and we broke up for a while, but eventually I sucked it up, because I loved you and I was miserable without you, but even after that, you still never told me how you felt about me, every time I asked you about our future you changed the subject and told me to focus on the present, but then, the future came, and I got this amazing job offer, this job was literally my dream coming true, and still, I was willing to give that up for you, and yes, I shouldn't have given you a stupid ultimatum, but honestly, can you blame me? You never told me how you felt about me unless you were cornered, you never trusted me, and honestly, I don't even think you loved me!"

He was about to interrupt me, but I kept talking, he was going to hear everything, and hopefully, he will feel like shit, because that's how he should feel "So yes, I gave you an ultimatum because I needed to know if you actually liked me, I needed to know that I wasn't just a sex toy for you, and I didn't even ask you to propose to me right away, all I wanted to know was if you were going to propose to me one day. And you couldn't even do that, so I decided I would take the damn job offer, because I had nothing to lose at this point. So Michael drove me here. And all I did with Michael was cry. I cried over you, that's literally all I did. And he tried to hit on me because he's Michael, but he was also trying to make me laugh, because I was pretty fucking miserable. Then out of nowhere you showed up, and the minute I saw you at that door I knew that if you saw Michael you would jump to conclusions again and do something stupid, and as always, I was right! You just ran away to Las Vegas and forgot about me. And I was so stupid, I actually quit my job and went back to Point Place to look for you, to try and explain to you that nothing happened, and you went MIA for three fucking weeks! I was so worried about you, I thought you drove into a ditch somewhere. Then you came back and told me you weren't ready to get married yet, and I was still going to take you back again, even if you slept with some skanks in Vegas, because I loved you that much. Then she showed up. When she told us you two were married, a part of me actually died, it was the worst pain I've ever felt in my entire life!"

I want to curse myself for the way my voice breaks, I squeeze my eyes shut and take a deep breath, but it's too late to stop the tears at this point "It was worse than all the times Michael cheated on me, it was worse than when you slept with that nurse, it was worse than when my father went to prison, it was worse than being abandoned by my own mother twice " I take a quick look at him and he was leaning his head in his hands, his head was down and I couldn't see his face

"I never expected that from you. All I wanted was to be with you, to build a life with you, and you weren't able to do that with me. But you were able to do that with a stranger, you married someone you knew for two weeks while we dated for two years and I couldn't even get you to tell me you loved me!"

I was sobbing uncontrollably at this point, so I stood up from the chair and leaned my head against the wall, trying to control myself. I need to say everything, so I started pacing "And you… stayed with her... You stayed with her and talked shit about me, you acted like our relationship was the worst thing that ever happened in your life! So I left with Donna, and it was probably one of the best decisions I've ever made, because I'm pretty sure that if I had stayed in Point Place you would've killed what was left of me, so, yeah, sorry is not going to cut it, Steven" I was practically yelling at this point

The room is silent for seconds, but it felt like hours, then I felt Steven grabbing my hand again. This time, I don't pull away.

When I looked at him, I almost passed out. He's crying, he is actually crying, and he isn't even trying to hide it. He never cries. He's holding my hand for a while now, and I couldn't help but notice how perfectly our hands fit, how good it is to touch him again, to feel him again.

"Jackie" his voice was low and hoarse "I love you. I have always loved you, even when you were with Kelso, I loved you, and I was a fool for not telling you every day. The fact that you actually think I never loved you is fucking killing me" I see a few tears leaving his eyes and my own eyes watered in response "I've never loved anyone like I love you, and I never will. Because you're it for me, doll. I love you and I will spend every day of the rest of my life proving it to you if you let me"

"You don't hurt the ones you love, Steven" I basically whisper, but he heard me, because he let go of my hand and lifted my chin up, making me look directly at his eyes.

His baby blue eyes were reddish and watery, and I could see all the pain and regret in them. Steven's eyes always showed his emotions, that's why he covers them with his stupid sunglasses all the time. As I stared deeply into his beautiful eyes, I noticed that he wasn't lying. He actually loves me, and normally that would make me squeal with joy, but right now all I can think about is how bad we screwed up. I can't forgive him, not now, but I can see that he's truly sorry, and that's a good thing.

"I'm so sorry doll, for everything, you have no idea how much I regret what happened" he whispers to me "But I meant what I said before, I'm not giving up on you, on us. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to have you back into my life"

"What do you want me to say, Steven?" I sighed, defeated

"That you won't give up on me either. That you're going to let me prove to you that I changed, I can be the man you deserve" he tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear

"And how can I do that, if every time I look at you all I can see is her? I know you're sorry, but that doesn't change what happened. How would you feel? Seeing me with someone else, rubbing it in your face?"

His face contorted in pain "I would die. I would literally die" he said, looking dejected "And I know doll, I know how much pain I caused you, and fuck, you have no idea how badly I want to take everything back. But Jackie, I'm willing to wait for you to forgive me. It can take days, weeks, months, I'll be waiting, and I'm ready now baby, I'm ready to give you everything you always wanted" he took my hand in his again and I lowered my head

"It's going to take a while, Steven"

"I don't care" he was drawing circles in my hand with his thumb "Those 6 months without you were the worst months of my life, Jackie. I've got a preview of what my life would be without you in it, and it's a pretty damn miserable life. I love you, I need you"

"Jackie, I don't wanna fight anymore. I'm tired of fighting, of pretending I don't care, I just want to be with you" He cups my face, lifting my head and making me look into his eyes again "I was an asshole, but I want to talk, I want to fix this, let me fix this"

I take a deep breath, wondering what the hell just happened in the last 15 minutes. After everything Steven's done to me, I should hate him, but I can't, I love him so much that it pisses me off sometimes. At least now I know he loves me back, but that's not going to erase all the pain I've been through in those last 6 months, I love him, but I can't trust him. And how am I supposed to know if he trusts me? He never did, even if I never gave him reasons not to. How am I supposed to let him in again if he doesn't trust me?

"Steven…" I start, and he looked at me expectantly "We don't trust each other"

"That's not true. You don't trust me. And I completely understand that, but I trust you with my life. I know I was a jealous asshole, but I've changed. Let me prove it to you, let me regain your trust" he brushes his thumb against my cheek, wiping a few tears, and I hold my breath. Those tiny touches and gestures of his are making my heart swell.

Screw it, I'll probably regret this later, but I'll also never forgive myself if I don't try.

"Fine" I can feel his grip tightening in my hand, and he's smiling "But I need to make something perfectly clear, we are not back together, it's going to take a really long time for that to happen, because I need to learn how to trust you again. Okay?"

"I'll take what I can get, doll" he's still smiling at me, and I couldn't hold back a grin myself

"So, friends?" I ask hesitantly

"Friends, for now" he grins and pulls me in for a hug

And as we're hugging, I feel safe for the first time in a really long time. I know I shouldn't feel like this, but right now all I can think about is how good it feels to be in his arms again, and how I never want to let go.


A/N: Hello again!

So, here's the thing, some people might say that Hyde and Jackie are a bit OOC in this chapter, but I have my reasons to write them this way.

I always believed that Hyde was the sweetest when they were alone, but sometimes he was kind of an ass with her when he was in front of everyone. The writers sometimes made Hyde mistreat Jackie in front of their friends for the "the sake of comedy" and I always fucking hated that. But they had their fair amount of cute moments, and I truly believe that he is a softie at heart.

In this chapter (well, in this story) Hyde lost his fear of showing vulnerability to Jackie. Mostly because he recognized that not being able to tell her how he feels is one of the many reasons why they broke up in the first place.

Being without each other for 6 months helped them grow, so they are more mature.

Jackie still loves Hyde, she recognizes it, and she knows him very well. She knows how hard it is for him to be this open, but she also won't forgive him that easily after everything. They just don't want to fight anymore.

There's no reason to fight if they both love each other and want to fix this. Jackie wants to forgive him and trust him again, and Hyde is willing to do anything in order to get her back, so they are going to work on it. (It's not going to be very fast, they still have a lot to talk about)

I know people tend to love the angst (sometimes I do too) but I don't want to focus the story on that.

I posted 6 chapters on a row today here in , these 6 chapters were already at AO3. I tend to update weekly, but I got a little excited and carried away, so I'll probably post chapter 7 this week.

Anyways, let me know what you're thinking so far, I'm open to criticism, as long as it's not rude.