A/N: Sorry it has been so long, life has been crazy. Just a short update.
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Weak in the Presence of Beauty (Alison Moyet)
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Chicago, January 2017
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The cold weather had drawn in and Alicia was wrapped up against the snowfall in a pair of black wool slacks, crimson jumper and matching scarf underneath her winter coat as she walked to meet Angela and Diane. Checking her watch, she noted she was late; she quickened her pace but was cautious not to slip on the sidewalk.
Her thoughts turned to Will and the fact he hated winter, hated the snow. She smiled to herself remembering him shiver against the cold Chicago air and how, when they were dating, he took pleasure in trying to guard her from the cold by enveloping her slim body in his strong arms, pulling her close to him. "Oh," she sighed, thinking about one evening waiting for a cab, when he wrapped his coat around her, linking his hands behind her back as she fell into his arms… she could almost smell his cologne even now, his scent, oh, how she had loved him. Taking her mind away from the icy sidewalk and thinking of Will, she momentarily lost her footing and slipped, only catching herself on a nearby storefront stopped her from falling to the ground. Shaking her head she regained her composure, from both the near-fall and thoughts of her lost love and continued on her way. Even now, Will still could fill her thoughts and affect her conscious.
…..
The three women are sitting in their usual bar, drinking wine and sharing stories.
"I still struggle to comprehend your relationship," Alicia said to Angela, "it seems so unlike Will to have a woman who," she paused, "meant everything to him, but whom he never mentioned."
"Even though Will kept me in the background and didn't want us to meet, he didn't hide me from you," Angela began. Alicia, confused, asked, "What do you mean? I didn't know you existed until Diane introduced us."
"He had pictures of me in his apartment, his cell phone, and in his office, although the latter was kept in a drawer once you started at the firm. Essentially hidden in plain sight."
Alicia wrinkled her brow, thinking about whether she had ever unknowingly seen a picture of Angela, "I don't remember," she said.
"He kept one on his desk, or as you say Angela, in the desk at different times, of his 'two favourite girls' - he was quite open about it. He also had it as a screensaver for a while too," Diane responded.
"Oh, yes, that is true, I loved that picture too. I have it on my phone," Angela said reaching into her purse. She fished out her cell phone and unlocked it. Flicking through her photos, she found the image and handed the phone to Alicia. "His niece and I, when she was about a week old," she explained, "Will had it in a multi-photo frame on the wall in his hallway, some images of his family, him as a young boy, and us."
Alicia stared at the image, it was familiar to her, she sighed, "I have seen it before," she said eventually, "at Will's apartment," she paused, "I always thought it was his sister Sara," she said looking across at Angela and Diane.
Angela smiled, "Yes, a lot of people thought it was his sister and niece. I think that was perhaps why he kept it up, even when you re-entered his life," she said, before adding, "I think I benefitted from resembling Aubrey a little bit, so he also had a picture of Aubrey, me and him up in his apartment and I think passed it off as 'his sisters'."
Diane smiled, "True," she said nodding at Angela's statement. "It was a simple white lie that was never questioned. Those of us who know Angela, or indeed his sisters, knew who the people were, others just thought Angela was Sara."
"I, I, don't know what to say," Alicia added.
"There were other things, smaller things, that at the time you wouldn't have thought about or questioned, but once you know, it is obvious," Angela said.
"Like what?" Alicia questioned.
"For a start, his watch. It's a Panerai - the watchmakers started out making specialist instruments for the Italian navy, which I always thought was kinda cool. I bought it for him, and it is inscribed, although the inscription is inside the back of the case. He always wore it, had a couple of different straps over the years though," she explained.
"Good watch and not as flashy as a Rolex; lots of other lawyers wear them and Will liked to be different," Diane added, "he did always wear it," she nodded at Angela.
"Yeah," Alicia said softly, blinking and pulling her bottom lip in over her teeth, "when we were in New York, things got a bit, excitable," she pondered the term recalling them rolling from the bed into the nightstand, crashing the lamp, phone and Will's watch onto the floor, "and his watch fell to the floor and was nearly trampled, he was quite protective of it, and afterwards picked it up and stowed it elsewhere. I wondered why, so thought it might have sentimental value, perhaps it belonged to his father, but he never said."
"Well, it was sentimental, and the colour of the strap - at least the original one - reflects the baseball team from back home that we both supported," Angela began, "and he did have his Dad's watch, he wore it sometimes, very rarely and never for work, but that was a much older vintage." She smiled thinking about Will and his Dad.
"He also used to disappear from the office," Diane began, "often at the most inconvenient times," she chuckled, "he was often meeting Angela," she clarified.
"Long lunches!" Angela replied, laughing.
"Yes," Diane agreed, "he would go out for lunch and be gone an hour, two hours, whatever, and return with lunch he bought from the café downstairs. How he thought I didn't know what he was up to!"
Angela laughed, "He knew you knew, at least when I was the lunchtime entertainment!" she joked.
Diane threw her head back, "Yes, very true!"
"Sometimes we did get lunch," Angela added, "and sometimes, nothing went on, he just came to take a nap with me before my shift, especially if a case was stressful, he needed the downtime."
"A nap?" Diane raised an eyebrow, querying the idea.
"Yes, although we didn't always sleep, sometimes he just wanted to lay down, talk things over, it helped him to think, and helped me to sleep."
"Hmm," Diane added.
Alicia smiled, unable to really imagine Will having a siesta with a woman he was also sleeping with, on and off, but then she still wasn't wholly sure of the depth of Will and Angela's relationship. "When Will and I were together we used to meet at lunchtimes too," she proffered. Alicia closed her eyes recalling the times she and Will had spent lunchtime sneaking around, visiting local hotels, spending time together. It was exciting, illicit, and fraught with difficulties; she was convinced they would be caught out and indeed they were, thanks to Grace's ringtone. But, it was fun, at least while it lasted.
"I know," Diane replied with a knowing look.
Alicia gave a weak smile, "Sorry," she said to Diane, "I'm sorry if our relationship caused problems," she squeaked almost inaudibly. "I'm sorry, I, I," her voice trailed off, she couldn't bring herself to say she was sorry she loved him, because she wasn't, but she felt she had to apologise for the relationship. She thought back to what she told Will when she left L/G, it wasn't personal, it was business.
"My dear," Diane began, "Do not cry because it's over, smile because it happened. I know you loved him, and he loved you. Your relationship, however it transpired, was inevitable," she leant forward and patted Alicia's hand.
"Don't be sorry you loved him," Angela added, "That is part of you and part of your history, hang on to it."
Alicia smiled, "Thank you," she replied.
"Will was very proud of being a Georgetown grad," Angela said, taking a drink of her wine. "It was where he grew up, where he become a lawyer and where he met you, so he kept mementoes from that time too," she added hoping to appease Alicia a little.
Alicia smiled, "I know he wore a lot of the sportswear, like for his basketball games, but I don't recall much else."
"Huh," Angela responded, "again, I think you had to be looking for it."
