I don't own South Park, Trey Parker and Matt Stone do.
Note: Spoilers for Persona 5 Royal
Wendy ran though the wreckage of the town. The city was deserted. There was fire everywhere and most of the buildings were in ruins.
"Hello!" she cried. "Is anyone there?"
She then stopped in the middle of the street where she saw a familiar face standing there amidst the flames.
"Stan!" she cried. "What is going on?"
She raced towards him only for him to turn around abruptly. The look on his face purely emotionless, his face stained in blood in one hand he was holding a knife...the other he held a Tegridy Farms T-Shirt all ripped up and stained in blood.
"Stan?"
He dropped both items in his hands and walked to her, his arms outstretched not for her arms but for her THROAT!
"You must...die" he said in a distorted voice.
He slowly placed his hands on her neck and began to squeeze weakly.
As much as It didn't strangle Wendy, it still hurt a little.
"Stan, what are you doing, it's me!" she cried.
"You must die...you...must...dieee" He groaned weakly, his voice still corrupted.
She looked closely into his left eye and gasped in shock.
The shape of his pupil. It was a flower!
It seemed to be glowing as he moved, moving him, controlling him deciding his every movement.
She remembered his song from Drakengard 3 the other day and remembered the curse of the flower and how it took over the minds of the Intoners. Could this be happening to him, his catatonic depression being taken advantage of like it did with Two's?
The shape of the flower in his eye grew and grew, until it took over the image of him and her view.
Wendy woke up with a gasp.
She looked around and saw she was in her room.
She then looked back on her dream and was starting to get nervous.
"Stan..." she breathed worriedly
Morgana: All right folks, today's the day we send out the calling cards!
Ryuji: Oh fuck yeah time to get ready!
Yusuke: I can hardly contain myself.
Kyle: Wait don't you guys need a few days to plan the perfect route to the treasure?
Ann: Oh that isn't necessary anymore. With some upgraded tech and these "Palace Maps" lent to us by these "Hollywood Elites" we've been able to calculate the perfect destination to your father's treasure, Kyle.
Makoto: Yeah, no need to worry about time limits or anything where you are.
Haru: We'll be able to go in and out in no time!
Ren: Once Kyle is able to deliver the calling card, we will infiltrate Mr. Broflovski palace and change his heart.
Heidi: Wait what about Eric. Will we do his after?
Morgana: Oh, well we can't really change two hearts at once. Plus we all need to focus on Gerald for the time being.
Heidi: Aw.
Morgana: BUT we decided to send some our other allies to do that task, Heidi.
Heidi: Who?
Ren: Our old friends, Sumire Yoshizawa, Zenkichi Hasegawa, and Sophia Ichinose.
Heidi: Ok cool, so they'll help me change Eric's heart.
Yusuke: Precisely. While we will go with Kyle to change his rotten, vile fiend of a Father.
Kyle: Hey don't call my Dad that, Inari!
Ryuji: Hey don't call him Inari you fucking Jew!
Makoto: Cut it out you two! This is not the time for bickering. Now, Kyle-Kun, do you and Heidi-Chan have your calling cards?
Heidi: Yep.
Kyle: Yes.
Haru: Good now Heidi, you find Cartman and sneak the card into his bag. Now Oracle, have you managed to pinpoint Broflovski-San's Location?
Futaba: Loud and clear Noir. I've managed to trace it to some small farm out in the country.
Kyle: That's Tegridy Farms!
Ren: Hm?
Kyle: That's where my best Friend Stan used to live until your Pandemic Broadcast spread out.
Ann: Why would he go there?
Heidi: Because nobody would think to look there because Stan left!
Makoto: Now we just have to find a way to get it to Gerald.
Kyle: I think I have an idea. Leave it to me.
Morgana: All right Kyle. Good luck.
Kyle left the group text and put his phone into his pocket.
He was inside the Whole Foods market looking around for Towelie.
He knew if Randy would have come to shop, he would be ostracized by the crowd of people. And he also knew Towelie worked at Tegridy Farms and since nobody really cared much for him, that he would go shopping for Randy.
If he could just find Towelie he could get the card to his father, open up the way to the Palace, change his heart, and get his family back.
He then thought of Heidi's goal in changing Cartman's heart.
He wondered why she would want to do it. Given everything Cartman had done to her, but then again he remembered how nice he used to be to her and realized maybe that was why she wanted to do it. Even if she would be in the hands of someone who would treat her better than he did before, it was still sad to have to let her go.
His thoughts were interrupted when he heard someone say. "Excuse me kid, you gonna move?"
Kyle looked at the person and found it to be Towelie.
"Oh, hey Towelie." Kyle said. "What are you doing?"
"Shopping for Randy." Towelie sighed.
"You're not angry at him for starting the Pandemic?" Kyle asked.
"Oh I am, but I have to work with him to provide for my family." was the Sentient Towel's response. He then looked around and whispered.
"And Kyle, I shouldn't be saying this but your dad is also hiding at Tegridy Farms."
"Oh, really?" Kyle pretended to act surprised. "In that case, you think you can give him this?" Kyle handed Towelie a white envelope.
"Sure." smiled Towelie. "Now can you get out of the way please? I need to go to this isle."
"Oh, OK." Kyle moved aside and he watched Towelie move away.
He smiled.
The card was sent.
"You did what?" Theresa cried at Heidi at school that day. "Heidi that sounds like a stupid idea!"
"Yeah, but what other choice do I have?" Heidi countered.
"You could not go with the plan." Isla suggested.
"Look, I get it that you guys don't want this, but I do! This is the only way to stop Eric's trouble once and for all!"
"It sounds like you just want him as your boyfriend again." Theresa narrowed her eyes.
"Well...yeah that too."
"But why can't you go out with Kyle? Even though He's Skankhunt42 Jr, at least he seemed to treat you better." Isla asked.
"Because..." Heidi groaned. "I don't think Kyle would want me!"
"What?" her friends said.
"After everything I said to him while I was...I don't think he'd even want me. The only person I was ever with was Eric but I can't go back to him either, not after everything he put me through! This is the only way I can finally get the Eric who geniunley loved me back."
She pulled out the calling card from her pocket and showed it to her friends.
"Wow..." Theresa said in awe. "A real life Phantom Thief calling card."
"But wait." said Isla, "You only met them two days ago. Don't you need time to...well you know secure a route to the treasure?"
"The thieves already did that." Heidi smiled. "Now all we need to do is send the Calling cards to Mr. Broflovski and Eric and everything will all be fixed."
"God, Heidi." groaned Theresa. "This has got to be the stupidest thing you've ever done, but then again you've done stupider."
Heidi rolled her eyes, shoved the card back into her pocket and walked down the corridor until she was finally looking at Eric Cartman unpacking his locker.
Heidi took a deep breath and said to herself. ("Oh my god, I cannot believe I'm doing this.)"
She then said in a strangled voice. "He-ey, Eric, what's-up?"
Eric turned around and was a tad surprised that Heidi was talking to him for the first time in a long time.
"Oh, Hey Heidi, what's going on?"
"What're you up to?" she asked
"Nothing, just getting ready for skewl." he said still surprised.
"That's cool, anyways I wanted to talk to you."
"Ok?"
"For a long time since I met you I really liked you. The way you said girls were smart and funny, that was the first time I've ever heard you say such nice things to me..or anyone for that matter." She shuffled around him until his opened backpack inside his locker was in her sight.
"Yeah, but then I realized that not all of them were like that."
"Then after a while, I was being manipulated and I never even noticed it. And I'm not sure you knew it either."
"Yeah, but you mean I was the one being manipulated."
Heidi sighed. "But yet, you never brought yourself to let me go because you only started to like me for the attention I gave you."
"I don't understand what you're saying." Cartman said.
Heidi brought herself close to his chest to distract him while from the corner of her eye, she dropped the calling card into the open pocket of his backpack.
"But it's okay. You can't help it. It's how you were raised, what you were taught from your parents. My father is stern and protective while my mother is doting and nice, so I'm kind and caring but I can also make some rash decisions along the way. And your mother, well she hasn't been the help you've needed for most of your life so you've become a bit unstable, emotionally and mentally, and even though she is becoming better, it hasn't been fixing up the mess she's caused for you." She then turned around and walked away, but then turned and said "I'm sorry, Eric, but everybody's trying to live life the best they can. It's hard enough without you always trying to get ahead." She finally disappeared down the hallway to rejoin her friends.
Cartman stared stunned at what she just said.
"Dude, did she just call me a sociopath?"
He looked as Heidi rejoined her friends, both of whom glared at Cartman as they took her past the corner.
Unbeknowst to him, Heidi was smiling.
The card was sent.
Towelie walked up to the farm and opened the door.
"Hey Randy, I'm home!" he looked around but didn't see Randy.
Gerald was sitting on the half couch on his laptop drinking wine.
"Oh Hey Towelie, Randy's upstairs in his room, he hasn't come out in a while."
"Oh, Gerald!" Towelie exclaimed. "I have something for you." He handed the white envelope over to him before walking over to the kitchen to put away the groceries."
Gerald examined the envelope. There was no address on the front, it didn't say who it was from. But then again, it was probably from one of his fellow trolls. He then opened it.
A small red card fell out and into his lap.
He examined it.
It had the symbol of a top hat wreathed in flames.
He turned it around and read the words.
"Sir Gerald Broflovski, the despicable troll of Pride, Greed and Vanity. You have done very horrible things in the past that you have never answered for. But now that all changes, We have decided to make you atone for all of your crimes. We will take your distorted desires without fail. From The Phantom Thieves.
"The fuck!" Gerald gasped in anger. "The Fucking Phantom Thieves. They can't do that to me!
[Reality around him flashed black for a brief moment]
"What I do is Fucking Funny! And those little bastards aren't going to ruin that for me. One way or the other!"
Cartman walked through the door past his mother.
"Welcome home, sweetie." she smiled.
"Fuck you mom." was his annoyed response as he walked upstairs to his room.
He then opened his backpack and found, on top of his schoolbook a small red card.
He immediately recognized it as a calling card.
He turned it around to read the words.
"Eric Cartman, the fat bastard of all sins. You have made unforgivable choices all your life, and the abuse you put your loved one through is but the latest. We have decided to make you atone for all your crimes. We will take your distorted desires without fail. From, The Phantom Thieves.
"WHAT!?" Cartman screamed. "Phantom Thieves?"
[Reality around him flashed black for a brief moment]
"I won't let them manipulate me! I'm the victim here, not them!
"Mom! The phantom thieves are trying to get me!" Cartman screamed.
"Oh don't worry hon, the Phantom thieves don't exist." Liane assured him from downstairs.
Heidi was outside Cartman's house when she heard his screaming.
"All right he's got it." she said into her phone.
"Perfect." said Morgana, "Now, we'll need Yoshizawa-San, Zenkichi-San and Sophie to change his heart. While the rest of us will go change Gerald's heart."
"But wait," Heidi cried. "What can I do?"
"You've already done your part." Ryuji's voice came through the phone. "We don't need your help anymore."
There was a loud slapping sound followed by Ryuji screaming. "Shut up, Skull!" Ann's voice hissed.
"What he means to say," Haru said assuringly. "Is that you don't need to worry about this anymore, you can just sit back and watch as your boyfriend becomes a better person. Hmm Maybe I should have done the same with Sugimura, change his heart."
"Thank you for your assistance, Heidi." Ren said through the phone. "You can just leave the rest to us."
And with that he hung up.
Heidi rested her back against the house. If anyone was going to help Eric see sense that way, it should be her. She could find out what went wrong with him, why he stopped liking her and maybe she could talk it out with him."
She was about to walk back when she heard her phone go off again.
She saw a symbol on it. The same symbol that she and Kyle saw that allowed them to be transported into the Metaverse.
Heidi then realized she could help Cartman, now she could transport herself into the Metaverse and get her boyfriend back.
Without thinking the pressed the app and a white light shot out of the phone.
Kyle was outside Tegridy Farms with the Phantom Thieves on the phone and Morgana next to him.
Ren then said, "All right, now that Cartman's heart is going to be changed it's up to us to change Gerald's heart."
"OK," said Kyle. "Just go easy on him all right?"
"We will." promised Futaba.
"If you're so worried about him," Makoto replied. "Maybe you should be the one going easy on him."
"What do you mean?" Kyle asked.
"Isn't it obvious?" Yusuke answered. "You're coming with us."
"What!?" Kyle cried in shock.
"Yeah," Ann said. "We figured if you're Gerald's son, maybe you can help him see sense."
"Are you sure I've got what it takes?" Kyle asked.
"Sure!" Morgana laughed. He pulled out the phone and gave it to Kyle.
Kyle looked at the Metaverse app hesitantly but then said.
"Gerald Broflovski is my father, and I will do whatever it takes to get him back." He pressed the app as he and Morgana were transported into the Metaverse.
Kyle opened his eyes and found out that he and the others were not in South Park anymore.
Instead they were in some sort of Mythical area. Kinda like something out of Dungeons and Dragons.
There was a clear water blue sky with snow white clouds with a multicolored rainbow arcing over the whole area.
They were standing in front of a small village where there were some normal looking people dressed in danish clothing all around.
"What the hell is this place?" Kyle and Ryuji both said in Unison.
"This is Mr. Broflovski's Palace." Morganna said in awe. "I know it's weird."
"But why are there so many women?" Kyle asked seeing the cognitive versions of all the women from South Park all clumped together in one area. "Why are they all dressed funny?"
"Probably because that's all he can see them as." sneered Futaba. "Tools, jokes, dolls!"
"His heart is too twisted," Haru lamented. "But all the more reason we must act now."
"We'll show you the way to the treasure, come on." said Yusuke.
And with that all Phantom Thieves (and Kyle) charged through the village until they stopped at the base of a ginormous hill.
At the top rested a giant stone cave with a dark gray cloud hovering overhead.
"That is where the treasure is," said Makoto. "After we sent the broadcast of Mr. Broflovski to the public, we began planning our route to the treasure. We made sure to secure it before we came to get you."
Kyle sighed.
"Whatever it takes."
"This way," Ren gestures towards the back of the hill "Come".
The group then made its way towards the back where there was a tiny hole...an entrance."
"All right dad." Kyle muttered. "It's time to end this."
The next morning the streets were packed with people. They were holding signs that said "We say No to Tegridy." "Weed is Woe." "No need for weed." They were angrily chanting. "Hey-Hey, Ho-ho! Tegridy has got to go!"
The Whites were driving their car towards the streets as they were slowly marching towards the farm.
"A protest against Tegridy!?" snarled Bob. "Well we'll just see about that."
"Quiero Mi mama." Julio Whimpered.
Emily looked through the Book she was holding and said. "Tu mama es alla."
"Ella es no mi mama." Julio sighed.
"Woah, how did you do that?" Bob gasped in shock.
"Well, I felt bad that I could understand little Julio the other day, so I purchased a Spanish Book so I could understand Spanish so I could have some more conversations with him."
"Nice." said Bob nonchalantly.
They stopped when they arrived a few feet away from the marching crowd.
Bob parked the car and the five of them got out.
Bob handed everyone their signs.
"All right family...and girl." he growled. "For Randy!"
"For Randy!" they all said.
They marched towards the crowd with their signs. "We Love Tegridy." "Randy did nothing wrong!" "Weed is Wonder."
"We stand for Tegridy" They all chanted over and over as they marched towards the growing and growing crowd.
Heidi woke up on a stone hard floor.
She looked up and found herself standing in front of a giant golden castle.
The sky above her was a blood red blotting out any traces of sunlight with black clouds.
Surrounding the castle was a giant fence.
On either side of the castle were a row of houses as well as behind her.
Looking back up at the castle she noticed a giant statue of someone all familiar to her.
Eric Cartman.
note: This is a reference to the Shroob Castle from the game Mario and Luigi Partners in Time.
At first it seemed weird to her that a giant castle like this but then again she realized this was probably how Eric saw himself. As above everybody else better than them.
She had no time to waste.
She hurried over across the the street towards the doors.
Heidi looked at them and froze.
Was she really going to do this?
Change Eric's heart all by herself.
She pushed open the doors...
...and at that moment she found herself surrounded by a horde of weird looking guards.
"Intruder!"
"Halt, Infidel!"
"Resistance is shitty, Bitch!"
Heidi rolled her eyes.
"God Damnit."
"Let's take her to the master, shall we?" said the guard facing the back.
At that moment he was shot in the back by a mysterious person who retreated into the shadows with an agile form. The shot guard burst into dark shadowy energy.
Then the two guards on either side were suddenly struck down with two bolts of dark blue energy.
Then a yoyo swooped out from behind her, coiling around the neck of the final guard, squeezing until it burst apart into dust.
Heidi then found herself surrounded by three unknown people.
They were costumed just like the Phantom Thieves.
The girl with red hair in a ponytail wore a black coat similar to Joker but with a leotard underneath. Heidi immediately recognized her as Kasumi-or rather her real name: Sumire-Yoshizawa.
The tall man in the black getup that looked like a cowboy, Heidi saw as Zenkichi Hasegawa.
Finally, the girl in the orange hair and white tube-like clothing was Sophia. An AI that rebelleed against her owner to assist the Phantom Thieves.
"Are you all right?" Sumire asked.
"Y-yeah." Heidi breathed shakily.
"What is a girl like you doing in here anyhow?" asked Zenkichi.
Sophia scanned Heidi said explained. "She is Heidi Turner. The girlfriend of our current target, the one Mona-Chan told us about."
"Nice to meet you Heidi," smiled Sumire. "But how did you get into the palace?"
"Yeah, and what's the deal with you and Cartman anyways?" Zenkichi asked.
Heidi sighed and said
"I might as well go back to the beginning."
(Recommended Soundtrack while reading this. Drakengard 3: Zero's Memories instrumental. Also the piece for most sad scenes here and mainly Heidi's theme.)
It was a while back.
An Internet Troll known as SkankHunt42 was on the internet ridiculing innocent women and girls online.
My mother was one of the unfortunate victims
One day I just couldn't take it anymore and I just threw my phone off the bridge...quitting Twitter.
Of course, everyone thought it was Eric Cartman, this fat, obnoxious boy at our school and logically everyone wanted him to stop.
His friends lured him out to a cabin in the woods where they smashed his phone and computer so he couldn't use them to go online.
By the time they realized it wasn't him it was too late.
We were both cast out by society without social media...
So...
we came together.
We began to understand each other in a way neither of us had ever seen before. Interest, traits...even love.
He was so ambitious, he believed women were smart and funny, and he talked a lot about going to Terraform Mars.
So to fulfill those dreams, and to escape the wrath of our 4th Grade teacher who became president. We went to Space X to colonize Mars.
However there was something there that changed Eric. Made him think less of woman, of...me.
So when our journey to Mars failed, Eric was acting all different around me.
He started rolling his eyes every time I tried to speak to him. He ignored me.
He then broke up with me because he thought I was abusing him in our relationship.
But in truth...it was the other way around.
After he broke up with me, He threatened to kill himself if I didn't take him back. And yet he still didn't pay me much notice.
He didn't seem to love me for my personality anymore, only the attention.
It even got to some points where he tried to get me killed by a witch just because I made him late to a pumpkin patch. Or trick me into eating meat-I'm a vegan-because I wanted him to eat healthier.
It got to the point where I began to start acting like him, because I was tired of the abuse I got from him...from my friends.
Then once I realized what I had done. I finally broke up with him for good.
"However, even after that. There was a small part of me that missed that old Cartman, the one who I fell in love with. And I thought if I joined up with you guys. I might be able to change his heart and return him to the boyfriend I loved." Heidi sighed sadly.
"Oh, Heidi..." Sumire sighed sadly. "Don't feel upset, that's why we're here...to change his heart."
"Yeah," smiled Zenkichi. He bent down and put his arm around Heidi. "Besides, thanks to the maps lent to us by the Hollywood elites and the kids, we know where the treasure is." He pointed up towards the giant statue of Cartman.
"And the perfect route to it has already been secured." smiled Sophia. "I believe advancing now would be highly beneficial."
"Yeah," Heidi smiled. "It's time to go."
They headed into the open doors and retreated into the shadows. Prepared to make their way up to the statue.
Meanwhile Back in South Park.
The Whites and Emily were chanting as they charged further and further towards the crowd of Protestors.
"We stand for Tegridy!" They chanted.
"The hell are ya doin, Bob?!" shouted Skeeter. "Why are you rooting for Tegridy!"
"Because nobody cares about the Whites!" Bob retorted. "We're trying to make a stand. Since our blasted savior couldn't make America great again and protect this Splendor of a farm, It's up to us to do so!"
"President Garrison, did NOT make our world a better place, Bob!" scolded Jimbo. "He just went around scaring children! And my Brother in Law's farm is not splendor for South Park. All its ever done was cause us more problems, And we're idiots for not realizing it sooner!"
"Emily!" cried Tammy Nelson-Emily's best friend-from the opposite side. "What the hell are you doing?"
"Oh, I'm sorry I'm taking a stand for my boyfriend to honor his memory by following the ideals of his family!" Emily shakily retorted.
"Emily, this is not like Jason to do!" Tammy scolded.
"Shut up!" Emily cried, small tears forming in her eyes. "You don't know Jason like I have! I broke up with him because of Mr. Broflovski. We never got the chance to bcome official again before he...He...he's gone forever, and I...I.."
"I know you miss him, Emm." consoled Nichole. "But don't you see...TEGRIDY FARMS WAS THE EXACT SAME THING THAT KILLED HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE!"
"What?" Emily was taken aback.
"The reason Jason was run over by that Police Car was because it was transporting Randy to prison!" Nichole shouted. "BUT YOU WHITE'S IN YOUR IDIOCY WERE SUPPORTING THE SAME PARTY THAT LEFT YOUR SON KILLED AND HIS GIRLFRIEND UTTERLY CONFUSED AND SUSCEPTIBLE TO YOUR FUCKING BULLCRAP!"
"Ohhhhhh" Emily said in shock. "That makes a lot of sense."
Before anything else could happen there was a "THUD!" and a small boy stood on top of a building.
He was a small Mexican 10 year old boy, (Around Jason's age). He wore a red shirt with a gray jacket and jeans. He had a white paper plate over his face with some red marker stained on it. He was looking down at the Whites and sneered.
"Venganza está mío...White Familia."
"Alejandro!" cried Bob. "For Pete's sake Alejandro we haven't seen you in months, you've nearly given your mother a heart attack. Come down here this instant!"
"Yo soy no Obedando tu comande!" Alejandro shrieked.
"BIEN GRACIAS, Y TU!" Bob screamed so loud his voice scratched. "Now come down here before I break your legs!"
Emily started at Bob and said in a puzzled tone. "Mr. White you know what you said in Spanish doesn't make sense."
"What doesn't?" Bob growled.
"What you said to "Alejandro" doesn't make any sense." she said louder. "That's not what you would usually say to someone who refuses to obey your command!".
"Well the people at the ICE detention center said this to the kids so therefore it's OK for us to do so as well to communicate."
"Wait," cried Emily, anger rising. "So you adopted this other kid after Jason died from a Immigration Detention center, raised him to be like you, yet you never took the time to understand his own foreign language like I have, or his own emotional problems!"
"Yes, what about it?" Bob asked.
Emily face palmed.
"Yeesh, no wonder Jason hated you guys."
Meanwhile, back in Eric's Palace. Heidi, Sumire, Zenkichi, and Sophia were still exploring the main hall.
"So how are we going to make it to the main Statue on the top?" Heidi asked.
"The best way is to avoid detection." Sumire explained. "We head towards the top of the palace through the shadows." And with that, and with agile form, she backflipped up the staircase and into the distant shadows up ahead.
Zenkichi and Sophia nodded and they zipped up the wall joining Sumire at the top.
Heidi stared nervously.
She took a deep breath then sprinted up the staircase narrowly getting detected.
She then suddenly slipped on something on the ground. A Kitty...Cartman's kitty!
The kitten let out a yowl of pain before transforming into a giant shadow monster akin to that Monster Garfield with the long legs.
It howled furiously before rounding onto the defenseless girl.
"HEIDI!" screamed Sumire and Sophie.
"NO!" cried Zenkichi.
Heidi flinched and covered her eyes with her hands before she knew the cat was going to eat her.
Suddenly she heard a gunshot...followed by three more. She looked up and saw Monster Kitty wobbling nervously in his paper thin legs.
Bullets were shot through them.
It crumbled to the floor and dissolved before her eyes.
She turned to the other three Phantom Thieves to see if they had saved her. But to her surprise, they weren't armed with their guns.
"Oh come now," came a voice from behind her.
The person walked out holding a silenced pistol. One could make out what appeared to be a grin underneath the black helmet.
"Did you really think I would miss out on the fun?"
