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Toby's POV
If there was one word, I could describe what I was feeling for the last 3 days, it was relief. Throughout the constant workouts from weights and running, I have not felt this relieved in possibly years. As I finished my morning routine from running, I felt the soreness of my body take effect. Even though the constant running and weightlifting has tired myself out, it was that effect that made you certain the workouts are working. You don't know progress until you know pain.
Letting the cold water from the gym shower hit my body yet again, I felt more aware. Even though it was still a cold, snowy winter, the combination of my baggy clothes and sweat from running was enough to make me feel sweaty, which all went away as the cold water freshened me up. After 5 minutes, I left the area before any students finds me in the area.
I had taken a look in the mirror to see what 3 days of nonstop weight lifting and running had done to me so far. Unfortunately, not much. I still had a rather chubby face that lacked eyewear. Though I did see a small noticeable change in my muscle mass, in particular, on my arms, most likely from bench pressing daily. Regardless I told myself that not getting distracted from the daily workouts will eventually result in what I'm searching for.
Today had been my 3rd workout in a week, with a 4th workout planned most likely tomorrow. I went to the water fountain to fill up my water bottle, something I've done daily, due to the amount of water I consume every day, due to the workouts and lunch. I washed my face after my water bottle was filled, looking at my slightly pudgy face in the front mirror.
Such an exercise heavy workout still hasn't satisfied me, as I considered what the next workout would consist of. I still hadn't obtained the punching bag I wanted, though I had the hand wraps ready in case I got them. I was convinced to start doing leg presses, but because I would run shortly after, it would severely tire out my legs, while not working out my upper body enough.
As I went into my first class, I took a seat in the back row, in the corner, something I had done ever since I started the workouts. Locked away from the rest, invisible, I pondered on my thoughts on the next workout I would endure this afternoon.
I would spend most of it in the garage, where I had bought my own weights, treadmill and finger wraps. The only thing I was waiting for was a punching bag.
You may wonder how I paid for all of the equipment, well, offering my neighbours to help shovel the driveway, I was able to gain some notable earnings, alongside the workout of pushing snow off driveways. I was still rather cautious on my saving fees, and once I got a punching bag, I would probably still do jobs for them and put the money and earnings in my savings.
Unfortunately, not all of the money was coming in quick enough, and I resorted to some more shady ways to gain money, but I stopped that before it could become an everlasting effect on me. The last thing I wanted was to be in a situation I could not get out of.
In particular, the punching bag I was eyeing up at a store, an Outslayer Heavy Punching Bag. A tall, thin, and composed of hard leather. Perfect for punching and kicking, and while the almost rock life surface may hurt my hands and feet, shoes and hand wraps may help with that.
My mind was so entranced that I failed to notice the teacher calling my name. Not that external and physical matters didn't mean anything to me anymore. I had tried my best to spend as little time in Degrassi as I possibly could, though not to the point where teachers would scold me for being late.
As soon as the bell rang, I would grab my stuff, my work and exercise bag and get out of Degrassi, wait for the bus and return to my home. There I would prepare in the garage for another heavy workout filled with bench press, leg press, treadmill workout, or soon enough, a punching bag would lay in the garage.
In a way, spending as little time as possible in Degrassi helped me stray away from all the negativity within the building. This short time spent in Degrassi also helped me avoid Jay and Spinner, though that may also be due to the fact that I've become invisible to the public, and rarely spent any time in the halls, only going to my locker, rushing to class to get the farthest possible seat, and rushing out to the bus.
"Toby." I heard a voice, much louder. I looked up to see Miss Kwan, giving me the stern look. I sighed, before replying.
"Yes?" She proceeded to hand out a paper, with a red A- on the sheet. It also had a see me underlines as well.
That raised an eyebrow for me. While I usually got straight A's in class, I did recently and occasionally dip to a B, but that still was a 3 GPA, so why was I getting a see me pen?
"So apparently bumping down by like 5% is enough to notice a problem, here," I shook my head. Academic and marks were always a priority, rather than the social and wellbeing of the student. Who cares if the kid's got problems at home, or socially? He's getting 90s and high marks. I laughed silently before shaking my head.
I turned to see some eyes on me, but receded shortly after I noticed. I looked back down, not letting the worry of grades consume me. I was smart enough, and even through all the workouts, I still made enough time to study. So, it wasn't like my grades aren't passing barely, I was still excelling in the class.
I shook my head, and continued to think about my afternoon workout. I probably would just move onto to the next class as soon as the bell rang.
But that didn't happen.
When the bell rang, I got up and was prepared to leave the class alongside the rest, but Miss Kwan called out my name yet again. I groaned; I might not get a back seat in my next class.
"Yes?" I answered out uninterested.
"Did you not see the see my pen?" I held in the need to scoff, but continued.
"No I guess not." She looked at me, challenging me.
"Well I want to talk about your marks and class involvement," She started.
I was about to interrupt her before she continued.
"I know you're worried about your next class, but I'll let them know you here with me,"
I breathed loudly, before letting her continue.
"Toby, your most recent marks have seen you fall 5% recently, you've barely been responding to anyone, including me, and your class communication skills have plummeted immensely, what's happening," She sternly said, putting her glasses on.
"Don't put your glasses on, they're reminding me of-"
I shook my head and told her simply.
"The work's just gotten harder to understand, that's all,"
"Are you sure, your previous grades are filled with high and mid 90s. Now, we're seeing you dip into the high 80s,"
That confirmed what I had thought. Marks on tests will always be a teacher's number one priority over the social wellbeing of a student.
I gave a look of complete disbelief before grabbing my stuff.
"What do you want me to do? I hand in assignments, I complete my tests, answer questions, and listen to your lessons, I don't see anything I can do the improve my marks," I finished boldly. Standing up shortly after, I walked out of the class. I didn't want to go to my second class, so I just hung out at the cafeteria. Waiting patiently for the bell to ring, my mind again shifted to what had happened.
If was strange to say the least, but also worrisome. Not one was supposed to notice a change, no teacher or student. If any of them had noticed something, it would spread across the school like a virus. The last thing I want is people talking about me. That's partial why I decided to skip my second class entirely, I didn't want to interrupt anything that would garnish unwanted attention.
I looked at my watch at noticed that the bell would ring in about 15 minutes. Lunch would follow. Sighing, I opened my lunch and water bottled and consumed my lunch. Full of protein and carbohydrates, it would be a nice energy source. Maybe I could go to the gym and run some laps.
As I finished the rest of my meal, I quickly refilled my water bottle and went to my locker. By the time I reached my locker, everyone had already reached at theirs. Grabbing my workout bag, I made my way to the gym, which luckily, only had two people preparing to leave. Once they were gone, I went on the tracks and began laps.
I spent around 20 minutes of nonstop laps, before I slowed down and went back in the change room. Looking at myself through the mirror, my legs were showing some muscle mass, alongside my arms, though it would be hard to see under baggy hoodies and sweatpants.
Nonetheless, I was content that I was noticing some physical change. While at first glance it doesn't look like much, up close is a different story. Switching my shorts and white T-shirt for my typical hoodie and sweatpants, I filled my water bottle up in a nearby fountain, looking in the front mirror.
Looking down to see my water bottle filled, I closed it and put it in the bag.
A second later, I felt a sudden push, as if I was shoved right next to the fountain. I managed to turn myself around to see Spinner giving me a dirty stare.
"Get out the way bitch," was all I heard from him, as I looked and saw Jay and Spinner taking a seat in the change room.
I said nothing as I watched them simply stare off, clearly off on some substance. I shook my head in disgrace. Jay seemed to notice my presence still and began to form a crooked smirk. He stood up, and walked towards me.
While I was tempted to run, I wanted to show that I wasn't afraid, so I stood my ground, which only made him widen his crooked smile, which only added to the terror factor.
Quickly however, Jay's smirk turned into a frown, filled with anger and hatred.
"Get out of here, nerd face!" He shouted, before pulling out a glass bottle and throwing it right at my face at point blank range.
...
"Scraaash!"
...
The glass bottle struck me right in my forehead, breaking upon impact, causing me to tumble back. I noticed blood pouring from above me, and I put my hand on my forehead, only to feel a crimson liquid pour down me like the start of a rain shower. I sent a mixed look of shock and anger to Spinner and Jay before I ran out.
Quickly getting some cloth to block the flow of blood, and heading to the washroom to use the big mirror, I realized how bad the cut was. Fresh blood was pouring out still, the surrounding skin took a red coloured look, and the cut itself looked somewhat deep. No doubt that stitches would be required. Concluding that, I made my way out the school and onto the nearest bus I could find. I spent a whopping 20 minutes in the bus before I took off at a bus stop near a clinic, sprinting into the patient room and requested for a stitch up. They quickly noticed my forehead wound and took me in almost immediately.
Once they took me in, I had lost reality within myself, most likely from a painkiller that they put in, as they started cleaning and stitching the wound.
About half an hour later, they finished and cleaned up my wound, and now I was waiting for the painkiller to subside.
All I had heard from them is that the wound shouldn't cause any long term brain injuries, which was a relief, right?
I couldn't remember anything that had happened during that. I probably had said some random crap that may also have consisted of slurs and mumbling. Regardless I got up from my room, with my backpacks, that were right next to the bed, and headed out, thanking the doctors who patched me up.
I looked at the time, and realized that I could get home at a normal time and get my workout in, which made me smile. Despite the obstacle today, it wouldn't stop me. As I boarded the bus, waiting to head home and maybe do more weight-lifts, a certain set of thoughts and words popped up.
I had told myself I wouldn't let myself be pushed by Jay and Spinner again, yet here I am, with a stitched-up wound from the likes of them.
I was done, I was done being a punching bag for those tyrants. With newfound strength, my mind was certain for the purpose it wanted to complete, and it couldn't have been any clearer.
"No More."
Craig's POV
It was becoming more tolerable, maybe even a bit enjoyable. Ellie beside me giving me the support I need to release my thoughts was also helpful. The therapist seemed to be happy with my progress to. While I still had to take my meds to control the imbalance in my brain, I felt much calmer than I have had in quite some time.
While I originally wasn't too fond of being in the same group as Ellie, I eventually changed my opinion. Not only was Ellie enjoyable to be around, but the others were just as enjoyable. Nigel had been fun to hang around as well.
But it wasn't just the fact that they were ell enjoyable, but it was the fact that despite us all knowing about each one of our issues, we didn't let that be all we talked about. We talked about games, work, what we did outside of life, and sports. Ellie and I talked about music and guitars; Nigel was talking about cars, which always made me laugh, as he reminded me of Joey a lot.
Speaking of Joey, he's doing much better, he's healed from his wounds, and despite the broken nose still looking... broken... His jaw and fractures have healed. He's just happy that I'm doing better.
As the therapy session finished up, I was approached by Ellie, who nowadays gave me a smile.
"So, about the drums," she began. I knew immediately what she was mentioning.
"We could go to the music room if you want," I replied.
"Sure!" She shortly after went to the music room. I laughed at her chirpiness lately.
I entered the room to see her holding a guitar case, which she was handing to me, which I accepted.
She began setting up the drums, preparing to create a beat.
I saw as she attempted to play a beat.
It wasn't bad, but there was definitely room for improvement, as I did see a lot of potential in her.
"Here let me show you," I said as she gave me the stick, allowing me to drum a nice quick beat. She gave me a pleased smile, before sitting up. I quickly gave her back the sticks, but she put them down before pointing to the guitar.
"I want to hear you play," she said simply. To which I smiled.
Setting it up, I let my finger lightly skim the strings of the guitar, creating a smooth sound, that I continued as I sang a bit of words. With Ellie, she didn't mind acting as an audience to my notes, songs in the makings. It was nice, not having to have someone bring up your struggles. With a deep breath, I began singing.
"Imbalance in my brain, I'm toxic,"
"Settle our differences because the pain is chronic,"
"Don't you run away from these drugs making me chaotic,"
"I can't take the pity from you anymore it's ironic,"
"Laced up baggage's I'm storing them in my nostrils,"
"It staying with me 'til I reign with the fossils,"
"Bottles full of oxycodone, the pain making me hostile,"
"Fearing me, but loving me when I'm a model,"
"Don't let my pain radia-ay-ate,"
"Keeping up with smoke, there's no deba-ay-ate,"
"Leaving me again, please wa-ay-ait,"
"I can see you as my soul mate,"
"Tipping off my meds, I'm scared to lay,"
"Watching my short life, as my hair turns grey,"
"Remember when all we did was horseplay,"
"Put you in a trance, listening to reggae,"
I stopped when Ellie notified me, I had a guest appear at the front door. It was then I realized the guest was Joey.
"Oh, hey Joey," I welcomed him, hoping he wasn't listening.
"Hey Craig," he started, "I just came to let you know that I've been waiting for 15 minutes now, I thought something was keeping you behind,"
"Oh no, I was just playing some guitar," I replied. However, Joey was more interested in the girl next to me, the girl who was listening to all my songs for the past 3 days. It was then I realized I never introduced them.
"Sorry, Ellie this is Joey, my step-father," I told Ellie. Before I turned to Joey and continued,
"Joey, this is Ellie, my friend. She's in the same therapy group as me. She's also been my top listener to my songs," I told Joey, who only smiled.
"Well, Ellie, it's nice to meet you, I'm here to pick up Craig, do you need a ride home as well? Or do you want to spend more time with Craig at our house?"
I looked from Joey to Ellie, the latter responding.
"Sorry Joey, but my mom wants me home by a specific time, maybe another time,"
"Okay, you set Craig?"
I turned around to Joey.
"Yep! See you Ellie!" I yelled, hearing her faintly reply.
"Good bye."
