I know a lot of people are iffy about the last trial. Trust me, I read you loud and clear. Thing is, chapter 3 of the 2nd game is widely considered to be the worst murder in the entire series. I knew I wasn't getting through here without a couple scrapes. I'm not trying to make excuses, just saying. Ultimately, I'm better at writing emotional stakes than I am at writing mysteries. So, when writing this murder, I made the choice to focus on the emotional impact it would have on the characters, rather than writing some interesting brain-teaser. Maybe it was the right choice, maybe not, but the fact of the matter is, I managed to turn an awful trial into one that's just "disappointing." And while not ideal, that's good enough for me.

At the very least, I can promise that the next chapter's going to be more interesting. While I'm unsure how the trial will handle it, I'm planning a premise that no Danganronpa game has really attempted yet. But that's all I'll say without spoilers.

In any case, I hope you enjoy this chapter.


Chapter 24

Break My Heart

Monokuma nodded as he tallied up the votes. "Now then, though it may be obvious at this point... You got it right once again! That's like three in a row! That's right, the true identity of the horrifying blackened who killed two girls is Mikan Tsumiki!"

"Why...?" Maki asked, staring at the floor. "Why did you do it? Were you planning this all along? I just don't get it..."

"Hah... hahaha!"

"Sh-She's completely delirious." Byakuya said. "We're going nowhere."

"Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha."

"This is nothing like Peko..." Fuyuhiko muttered. "She's actually... gone mental...!"

"There's nothing we can do." Nagito shrugged. "She's no longer the same person. She's... no longer the Mikan Tsumiki we knew."

"...Huh?"

"Based on my predictions... She might've caught it, too. She probably had the Despair Disease, which was the motive for this case..."

"Mikan, too... you say...?" Gundham asked.

"I know because I was looking at Mikan for so long. She was the one taking care of me, after all. My consciousness kept drifting but even so, when I did catch a glimpse of her, her expression was... Full of despair. A despair so devoid of hope that not even a single fragment of it remained."

"Wait... Mikan also had the Despair Disease?" Maki asked. "That doesn't make sense... She should've shown other symptoms... A fever, at least!"

"But... because of that disease, Mikan was...?" Sonia started.

"The symptoms she surely felt must've been deserving of the name, Despair Disease." Nagito said. "Losing all hope... and harbouring despair for all hope... Because of the Despair Disease, she was likely overcome with despair. That's the reason why... she can still laugh in such a hopeless situation."

Everyone turned their attention to the Nurse, who continued to laugh hysterically.

"Which means the Mikan before us is no longer the Ultimate Nurse. She's a completely different person now that she's infected by the Despair Disease... She's a human who deserves to be called the Ultimate Despair!"

The title sent chills down the spines of everyone in the room. Everyone, of course, except Mikan, who continued to laugh.

"That's the reason why... I cannot forgive this. I mean, killing someone for the sake of despair, instead of for the sake of hope... There's no way I can forgive that."

"For the sake of despair...?" Mikan finally said. "Haha, that's completely wrong!"

"...Wrong? Wrong... what's wrong?"

"What I did... was for the sake of my beloved."

Maki looked up from the floor and stared, eyes wide. "...What...?"

"Wh-Who are you talking about...?" Fuyuhiko asked.

"If only they were still alive... They'd be so happy... I know. My beloved... was the only one... That's right, the only one who... never hated me. They forgave my existence. They forgave me and accepted me. They gave me value. They loved me. I loved them with all my heart and they returned it in full. This is... my reciprocation."

"But... B-But..." Maki struggled for the words, before suddenly she snapped. "What about me!?"

"...What about you?"

The response cut deep, and Maki stumbled backward. "What...?"

Mikan spoke, with a surprising amount of lucidity. "Too little, too late. You weren't there to provide me with affection, when I needed it the most. Do you really think I would choose you over my beloved? That you could earn my love so easily, when my heart already belongs to another? I wish I knew what it was like to have that much confidence in myself... But, to me, it looks like that overconfidence was your weakness. Because of it, even someone like me was able to play with your heart, and betray you so easily."

"B-Betray..." Maki couldn't come up with a retort. Everything Mikan said was true. She was overconfident. She was completely tricked by the act. She was too late. And the worst part was, there was no measure she could've taken to prevent herself from growing attached to Mikan. Just as they always had, her emotions made a fool out of her. She sank to her knees, sobbing quietly.

Mikan caught the stares of the other classmates, and added, "I understand that I did something unforgivable. But you know, but you know! To transcend all that is truly... what love is all about!"

"I don't understand... what you're saying." Nagito said.

"You don't understand? Is it because you don't have anyone to love? Is it because you're also someone who isn't accepted by anyone?... What a pity. I feel sorry for you."

Nagito himself was left speechless by the response.

"Even if I say this... I'm sure nobody here would understand but... Love is a wonderful thing. Ahhh, this feeling of freedom where you no longer care about anything! My beloved and I are the only ones within that thin veil, and I'm just looking out through it... That's why... as long as I'm on the inside, no matter how much they tease me, splash me with water, kick me... It's like nothing matters! I could just die, that's how little it matters! Who cares about hope or despair! It's love, only love!"

"Nagito... is this really the Despair Disease you were talking about?" Chiaki wondered.

"It seems that... I was wrong... Not only was she affected by despair..."

"You were half right." Mikan said. "It's right to say that this is all thanks to that disease. Because... thanks to that disease, I was able to remember by beloved."

"Re... member...?" Hajime repeated.

"Apparently that's what my symptom was. Haha... what a wonderful symptom..."

"Which means you had... the Remembering Disease?"

"But if this means she remembered something and ended up like this..." Nagito started. "Are you saying you were like this from the start? Were you like this before you even came to this island?"

"D-Don't get so angry...!" Mikan begged. "Well... first of all... The reason I became like this wasn't my fault. It was all your fault, you know? Because... it's not like I'm entirely responsible for turning out like this... I'm the person I am today because of many human relationships. From the random strangers giving me odd looks, to the harsh bullies like Hiyoko there. So... it's everybody's fault that I turned out like this, you see? Even so... the current me was most strongly influenced by my beloved's existence. And it was also my beloved who created the me that everyone can't forgive. But my beloved still forgives me and still accepts me... That is the key difference between all of you and my beloved. Even you couldn't forgive me, Alice. Only my beloved."

"Stop..." Maki choked.

"Like I said... who the fuck are you talking about!?" Fuyuhiko snapped.

Rather than give them the pleasure of answering the question on all their minds, Mikan simply burst into laughter again.

"Mikan... please answer me... Did you really remember?" Hajime asked. "You ended up like this... all because you remembered? There's no way I can believe that! There's no way... the person you are right now is the real Mikan...!"

"Ohhh... You still doubt me...? Then... to prove I remember, I'll tell you all something nice! It's about that World Ender organization that you all were worrying about."

"You know something? Tell us!" Byakuya demanded.

"Not know... I just remembered, that's all. I knew about it all along. How that horrifying organization known as "World Ender"... Is also the organization known as the Future Foundation."

"...Just what is the Future Foundation?" Nagito asked. "What are they planning?"

"As the name suggests, that organization is the "World Ender." The Future Foundation... is trying to end our world. To put it simply... They're trying to claim the world for themselves. As part of their plan to end the world, the Future Foundation... brought us to this island. Isn't that right, Monomi?"

"...Huh?"

"I-I knew it...!" Fuyuhiko snapped. "Monomi... Monokuma... They're both members of that crazy organization, aren't they?"

"Puhuhu. Monomi and I aren't members." The bear said. "I am Monokuma! My existence is entirely my own! Puhuhuhuhu."

"Puhuhuhuhu." Mikan mimicked.

"Don't laugh." Nagito said. "Hey Mikan... If you really so remember... Then you already know, right? You know the true identity of the traitor hiding among us."

"Ahaha, of course I know that! Let's see... the Future Foundation lackey that's hiding among you all... is... Oh well, nobody really cares about that, don't you think? You'll find out eventually... so there's no need to be impatient. Probably... when that countdown ends."

"You... you even know about that...!?" Hajime asked.

"I don't know anything."

"...Huh?"

"I have a feeling that's what it is, but... who cares about that, you know? I'm drowning in so much love... From the bottom of my heart, I just don't care about anyone or anything."

"M-Mikan...! Is this really you!?" Sonia asked.

"I-I won't believe it...!" Hajime said. "There's no way I can believe... you were like this all along... Because... if that's true...! Then who's the person we've been spending time with up until now!?"

"...The past."

"...P-Past?"

"That person... She didn't exist in the beginning... She's just my past self who lost her school memories... Haha... you guys considered that thing a friend, or even something more." She sighed. "...That doesn't make me happy at all. It just fills me with despair. You guys accepted my past self, but not my present self..."

"Th-That's...!"

"Well... that applies to you all as well. Memories of people... memories of events... Whatever memory it is, losing memories are... like losing your personal identity. Memory is the most important component in building a person... Don't you think? Losing our memories... makes us shadows of the past. Don't you think?"

"I don't know what you're trying to say but... In the end, it always leads back to that story." Nagito said. "That story about our stolen school lives..."

"S-So... it's true? We really did lose our memories?" Hiyoko asked.

"If it wasn't true... we wouldn't be suffering this much...!" Fuyuhiko said.

"Well, why don't you just take your sweet time and remember at your own pace?" Mikan suggested. "Oh Monokuuuuuuuma... Is it alright for you to start now?"

"...Punishment time?" The bear asked.

"No..." Maki suddenly looked up. "I can't... This is too much...!"

"Now then, I have prepared a special punishment for the Ultimate Nurse, Mikan Tsumiki."

"So it's over." The Nurse muttered. "It's really... Now I can go to my beloved who always forgives me...! I can finally see them. Please forgive me, the one who's going to die with the hope of finally seeing you!"

Maki jumped to her feet. "No! Don't leave me, Mikan! Please!"

"Let's give it everything we've got! It's... PUNISHMENT TIIIME!"

Chains flew out from the wall behind Mikan and wrapped themselves around her. With breakneck speed, they pulled her into her execution chamber.

"No! I can't lose you, Mikan! Not again! I can't lose you again!"

Maki attempted to run into the chamber after the Nurse. She didn't make it far before Fuyuhiko tackled her, preventing her from making the same mistake he did. Despite the sudden resistance, she fought him with unnatural strength. Byakuya reacted next, helping Fuyuhiko restrain her. She screamed bloody murder as the monitors in the trial room lit up. Lying on a hospital bed, in a plain hospital room, was Mikan. Monokuma entered the room, dressed in a nurse's uniform, and carrying a massive syringe filled with eerie green liquid.

"Bye-Bye Ouchies!" Monokuma ran at Mikan with the syringe, before jabbing it into the floor just before her bed. As if unlocked with a key, the room promptly opened and unfolded, revealing that they were in the middle of the desert. Suddenly, a massive arm-shaped rocket popped out of the ground, knocking Mikan out of her bed and leaving her straddling it. Monokuma injected the syringe into the arm, emptying its contents into it. During this process, Mikan grew increasingly ecstatic, ultimately letting out an orgasmic moan as the syringe completely emptied.

The arm changed from its skin tone to a bright red, curling its hand into a fist as it began to launch. Monokuma hung on by the syringe, and they rose quickly into the air, accelerating at an extreme pace. About halfway up, the part of the arm below the elbow disconnected, falling to the ground with Monokuma, while the main body continued to blast off. Eventually, the rocket reached space, and Mikan clung on for dear life as it showed no signs of stopping.

The camera cut back to the ground, where Monokuma landed face-first in the sand, like a cartoon character. In the sky, a twinkle was the only sign of where Mikan was. With that, the video feed cut to black.

Maki was no longer fighting. She was laying on the ground, collapsed, and openly crying. Over and over, she muttered one word. "Why?"

The others stood in silence, clearly unsatisfied with this conclusion. Gundham wondered aloud, "Who was that Mikan... from earlier? Was that her true form? Or... is that itself a symptom of the Despair Disease?"

"...It doesn't matter either way." Nagito declared. "If she ended up like that just from "remembering"... Then all along, Mikan was never worth being a Symbol of Hope. Even if her words were influenced by the Despair Disease, if that disease turned her into that... If she lost herself to a simple disease, she was definitely unworthy of being a Symbol of Hope. So... let's just move on. C'mon, let's take all this despair and change it into hope!"

"Th-That is impossible!" Sonia cried. "I mean... I thought we were friends this whole time... but even so..."

"That stupid... trashy... skanky... dumb bitch..." Hiyoko muttered. "To go and do something like this... Just our luck, I bet she's not even the traitor, is she...?"

"Too bad. That isn't the case." Monokuma confirmed. "Mikan was not the traitor. The traitor is still alive. As proof, see how fine Monomi looks right now."

"I-I'm not fine at all..." Monomi said, appearing ill at the execution.

"But if the traitor died, you wouldn't look this calm, right? I mean... you're both pawns of the Future Foundation. So you guys are like two hearts beating as one, right?"

"What does that make you, fiend?" Gundham asked. "You did say that you're different than Monomi..."

"Who cares about who I am!? More important, I'm tired! The drama just kept going and going, I didn't even have time to eat my black bean right eye during the break!"

"You're right eye is made out of black beans!?" Monomi gasped. "...Wait, now's not the time to focus on that. What are you trying to say!?"

"You know, isn't it said that life has its ups and downs? It's fun because downs come after ups, but if life was full of downs, wouldn't it get boring? Sooooo in order to help you guys feel better, I've prepared a special event!"

"...Special event?" Hajime repeated.

"Head over to the 1st island's beach. An old friend will be waiting there."

"Old friend...?"

"Do you mean...? Is it Nekomaru?" Byakuya wondered.

"I knew it..." Fuyuhiko said. "I knew that crazy bastard Nekomaru would come back to us in one piece!"

"Awesome! We're starting to see the light of hope!" Nagito cheered.

"The light of hope...?" Sonia repeated. "Um... I am happy Nekomaru is returning to us, but... but I... Three of our friends just died... So I honestly cannot be happy... However... Even so, I am still happy... If Nekomaru is safe, I am truly happy...!"

"Um... "Safe"... how should I say this... hmm..." Monokuma shuffled awkwardly.

"If you are happy... you should honestly greet him with open arms." Gundham suggested, ignoring the bear. "Perhaps those who have been taken from us would do the same if they still lived..."

Fuyuhiko chuckled. "Hey, Supreme Overlord of Who-Gives-A-Shit... That line doesn't suit you at all."

"Silence. I shall crush you into dust."

"Ibuki, Akane... Mikan. Can you hear us?" Sonia prayed. "If you are unhappy, I apologize... However... please forgive me for right now... I... want to warmly welcome Nekomaru when he returns to us!"

"You don't have to worry, Sonia... I'm sure your feelings are reaching them..." Hajime assured her.

"Then let's all go greet Nekomaru." Chiaki decided. "Let's make it grand, even for those who have died."

"...Yeah. Why not?" Maki agreed. Her voice was hoarse, and she made no attempt to wipe the tears from her face. She slowly stood and joined the others, but didn't look anyone in the eye.

"Well? What are we waiting for?" Hiyoko asked. "Let's go, already!"

"...Yeah, you're right." Hajime agreed.

With that, the remaining students ran to the elevator, and left the trial room once again, leaving Monokuma and Monomi alone.

As the elevator loudly rose, Monokuma looked dejected. "Maaaan... They just ran off without listening to what I had to say... Jeez, they're so impatient! Didn't they learn to stick around until others have finished talking!"

"Wh-What does that mean?" Monomi asked. "You... You're plotting something again, aren't you!?"

"Puhuhu. I'm not plotting anything... I was just trying to properly explain everything to them. Including... Nekomaru's body..."

"...Huh? Nekomaru's body?"

"Puhuhu... It's their fault for not sticking around until I finished talking... So if something happens because of that, I bear no responsibility!"

"Y-You... what did you do to Nekomaru...?"

"What did I do...? I just saved him, that's all. I mean, if I didn't do that... there's no way I could've stopped someone who was that close to death... So it just couldn't be helped. Puhu... puhuhuhu..."


No one dared slow down as they made their way to the beach on the 1st island. As they reached their destination, their heads turned to survey the entire landscape. There was no one else around.

"Where... where in the world is Nekomaru?" Hajime asked.

"We have come to pick you up!" Sonia announced. "Please hurry up and come out of hiding!"

They began splitting up, running up and down the length of the beach, calling his name. But no response came.

Fuyuhiko gripped his side as he slowed down, breathing heavily. "What the fuck...? Where the hell is he?"

"...Did Monokuma lie to us?" Byakuya wondered.

Suddenly, a new voice cut across the beach. "Gaaaah-hahahaha! What happened!? Were you all looking for me!?"

"Th-That voice!" Sonia gasped.

Everyone turned toward the source of the voice, and their jaws dropped. Rising over a dune in the distance was Nekomaru, but something was different.

"...Huh? What the-?" Hajime sputtered.

"Yo! I've kept you waiting!" He called out. He noticed their silence and shocked expressions, and asked, "Hey, what's going on!? Perhaps you don't remember my face since we haven't seen each other in a while!? That's pretty sad, you know! That's too much! Gaaaaah-hahahaha!"

"Um... Nekomaru?" Chiaki asked. "Haven't you... noticed it yourself?"

"What do you mean, "noticed...?" Oh, you mean this body!? Gah-hahaha! This is nothing!"

The robot standing before them flexed his arms, his eyes shining brightly in the dark of the night. "The name's NEKOMARU NIDAI! I've been reborn in the fires of hellllllll! Gah-hahahahaha!"


I walked through the halls of the administration building. I didn't have a destination in mind, but the trial was over, and I needed to stretch my legs and organize my thoughts. I didn't want to fall apart like I did before. I had to stay sharp. Of course, while I've been doing good at getting my sleep, I doubted I'd be able to tonight.

One of the things on my mind was a question Chiaki posed to me, just before I left. If Junko was able to restore the subjects' memories... why didn't she just do that to all of them? I had to admit, I couldn't offer a satisfying answer. I knew her end goal was to override the consciousnesses of all the deceased subjects, so that we'd have a bunch of Junko's running around with their insane intellect and despair-fuelled sadism, essentially creating a second, even worse Tragedy for us to deal with. If she restored their memories and made them go crazy, that would certainly increase the number of deaths, maybe even eliminating all of them, except Izuru. Of course, Junko loves spreading despair... maybe she just wanted to drive them all to despair all over again? I'd feel more confident if I had Miaya to bounce ideas off of, but she was sleeping right now. I'd have to add that to my checklist for later.

The main thing on my mind, however, was Maki Yugami, or rather, Alice Kizuki. Just today alone, I've learned more about her than I had during the entire killing game. With Celeste's and Miaya's help, I might be able to create a more accurate profile, but I'm not sure how well that'd help us at this stage. Her name was fake all along, which doesn't really make any sense. The system lists her as "Maki Yugami," and the system should have access to her deepest thoughts. That's why the Ultimate Imposter is listed as "?," because that's all they know themself as. Hajime is listed as "Hajime Hinata," but that's because his memories of any other name have been erased. But Alice obviously still remembers her real name, she was the one who brought it up.

Another thing was the reason she fell in love with Mikan. She stated that Mikan reminded her of someone from her past, a confidant and lover. This is literally the least vague statement she ever made about her past, but I still have no idea what to do with it. Who is this lover? I need a name, or at least a description more precise than "similar to Mikan." She said her lover died, but how? Was she related at all to the death? Did she cause it? Every new piece of evidence we gain just raises more questions, just confuses us further.

Speaking of confusion, I had considered that maybe nothing Maki- er, Alice was saying was true. She seemed to have some reservations about doing... well, anything in front of the surveillance cameras. She even hung a coat over the one in her cottage. Did she somehow know we were viewing her through those cameras, and decided to try and mislead us by faking that whole story? I considered it, but... I ultimately decided to drop that line of thinking. Aside from it leading down a rabbit hole that Occam's Razor would have a field day with, I have a feeling that, for what it's worth, Alice truly loves Mikan.

I know what it's like to love, and I know what it's like to lose. From the relief she showed when confiding in Mikan, to the distress she showed when accusing her of murder, to the pure anguish she showed when the Nurse was executed... I know Maki has both loved and lost.

No, not Maki. Alice.

"Alice Kizuki..." I muttered aloud. Why would that name come up now, of all times? It didn't matter. I had a lead. One lead. And you can bet your ass I'm gonna follow it all the way.

I turned and walked into the staff room, and paused. I wasn't alone. Kyoko was already here.

"Oh, hello, Al. I was just making some coffee. Care to join me?"

I blinked. I wasn't much of a coffee drinker, I much prefer hot chocolate, but... Well, I was planning on pulling an all-nighter anyway. And even still, this was a rare opportunity. Kyoko was inviting me to sit and share a drink with her. I can't remember the last time the two of us had a chat all by ourselves, if we ever did in the first place. I wasn't gonna pass this up. "Sure. Thanks."

A few moments passed in silence before she asked, "How do you take yours?"

"Huh? Oh, you don't have to... I mean, I can-"

"Just tell me."

"...Double-double."

I made my way over to a sofa in the corner, with a fancy glass coffee-table before it, as Kyoko poured our coffee into two different mugs. She filled mine with cream and sugar, but put only sugar in her own. Then she made her way over, handed me my mug, and sat down next to me.

I sipped my coffee awkwardly. Despite being an introvert myself, I definitely handled more outgoing people like Makoto and Hina better, or even people who were shy yet approachable, like Chihiro. Kyoko, though, was difficult. Mostly because I had to be the one to start the conversation, and I had to make sure nothing I said would make me sound like an idiot, an asshole, or both, but even having meta-knowledge of her only got me so far. Wasn't she the star of a spinoff novel in Japan? Maybe if I read that, it would help here... Wait, that sounds kinda creepy. Holy shit, I must've been sounding really creepy to everyone this whole time.

Kyoko shocked me out of my thoughts by speaking first. "I wanted to ask... Well, I suppose there's no beating around the bush. I was wondering: How are you?"

"I'm... better. I've been getting my sleep." I knew that didn't truly answer her question, I was just dodging.

"You surprised me with that stunt you pulled." She explained. "I always saw you as one of the more grounded members of our class. I wouldn't have guessed you would do something so foolish."

"I do foolish things all the time."

"True, and you always do it with good intentions. Still, you-"

"Not to be rude, but I already got this lecture from basically everyone else on the island. I learned my lesson, trust me."

She shrugged. "Fair enough. I was just trying to say... Well, I'm not sure how much you value the opinions of others, and this may sound off-topic, but I have to admit... I was always sort of afraid of you."

I nearly spat out my coffee. "I-I'm sorry, did I just hear you right...? You're afraid of me?"

"Look at things from my point of view. I wake up in Hope's Peak Academy, with most of my identity erased from my mind. One of the people I meet soon afterwards is a man who stands larger than most of the others, and he's such a smooth liar that even I have trouble determining if anything he's saying is true or not. Then, throughout the killing game, this man displays a level of intellect that, while not fitting of his "talent," is still enough to put him above the averages. On top of that, he shows an aptitude for gaining the trust of others." She paused. "Do you see what I'm getting at?"

"Uh... Kinda?"

"I'm saying, if you wanted to play the killing game, there was a real possibility that you could have won. Your stature would make anyone who didn't have an athletic- or combat-based talent an easy target for you. Even then, you could have gained someone's trust and taken them out when their guard was lowered. Your intelligence is geared toward solving mysteries, which would help you notice any evidence you would leave behind and allow you to clean the crime scene thoroughly. And your lying skills would make it easy for you to get through the trial. Combine all that with your knowledge of the game's events, and you could say the only reason we're still alive is because of your kindness."

I thought about that. "That never even crossed my mind. I totally could've done it, huh?"

She nodded. Then added, "Well, there are a lot of other factors that go into a murder. There's no such thing as the perfect crime."

"Yeah. With my luck, the victim would probably leave behind some decisive clue that I couldn't clean." I thought a little longer, before I asked, "You said you can't tell when I'm lying?"

"Not quite. You do have some tells when you outright lie. It's more like... In everyday conversation, you're just hard to read. You're more stoic than you seem to realize."

"Pot calling kettle black. I guess you're right, though. I'm not super expressive, most of the time. But, why'd you decide to bring that up?"

"Because for someone like me, not being able to read someone can be very worrying. So, when I ask you this next question, I want you to understand that I really do want an honest answer."

"And... what question is that?"

"Are you okay?"

I stared down into my coffee. It was the question she asked at the start of the conversation, just reiterated. Such a simple question, with no simple answer. But I had promised that I would let others help me, and Kyoko was expecting me to be honest. So I answered honestly.

"No. Not really." I set down my coffee cup as I decided to elaborate. "Miaya... she says I have an inferiority complex. On it's own, inferiority is just a human emotion. But for me... it's become compulsive. I see failure in everything I do, always prepare for the worst outcome. Most people with an inferiority complex become depressed, and stop trying because they don't see any point. For me, it's like the opposite. I don't see any point in... being able to live, if I can't even accomplish anything without sacrificing so much in return. If I can't even save one girl..." My voice cracked.

"...But you see it now. And you understand that it's not a healthy way to think."

"I know. I... know that. I'm trying to fix it."

"Why don't you tell Chihiro about it?"

"...Huh?"

"He suffered from feeling inferior for years. He's probably the one who would understand your feelings the most. Plus, he's your best friend, and he's also offered to help you, from what I hear."

Word spreads fast on this island, huh? I stared down at my coffee again. "...I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"I just can't. This... it's not something I can talk about with him."

I paused, waiting for her to ask, "Why not?" again. She stayed quiet instead. I answered anyway. "Chihiro... I said it once before, but he's the one I look up to the most. Even when Monokuma had his deepest secret, he didn't break. He decided that he wanted to improve himself, instead. And that's... scary. Not a lot of people have the courage to look at themselves and ask, "Is this what I want to be? Or am I gonna try to be something better?" And it's not just that. Chihiro looked up to Mondo, he was one of his inspirations for improving himself, and then Mondo... died. I've tried to establish myself as someone else who could inspire Chihiro, but I'm not a fool. I know that we're equals, and I know that's how he sees it, too. I'm already... barely good enough."

"You're comparing yourself to Mondo, and you think if you come to him with this, it could ruin his image of you?"

"...Like I said, I'm not a fool. I know he can see me struggling. All of you can. But it's more complicated than that. If I tell him this, I have to tell him everything, and there's never a good time for that. We can't afford to let him get distracted right not. Maybe once The Tragedy's settled down a bit..."

"Why push it off until later? How do you know there's going to be a "later?" How bad could it be, that you would risk never letting it go?"

"...Because I resent him. I'm... jealous of Chihiro." We both sat in silence for a minute before I elaborated. "All those things I said about him, about his courage, his drive? I can't do that. When it comes to something insignificant, I'm too lazy to care, and when it comes to something important, I feel like I have to press myself against the grindstone, and even then I'm prone to failure. I'd love to bring it up to him, but how would I even start? Imagine your best friend telling you he irrationally hates you because of his own weakness! That wouldn't help me, it'd just spread the problem to someone else. I'm just... stuck."

After a moment, she said, "I agree. It doesn't seem like there's an easy answer. I'm sorry I can't be of more use, but as you know, I'm not really good with this kind of thing. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have pried."

"No, I think... I needed to hear that. From my own lips. It puts some things into perspective..."

"In that case, if you still want my input, I do have something to say. I think... you could stand to be a little more selfish."

"And not in a "oh, Al's biggest flaw is that he's so selfless" kinda way, right?"

"Exactly. What you view as selflessness is making more work for the rest of us."

"I got it. I received this lecture, too, believe it or not."

She rolled her eyes. "Does everything I say really sound like a lecture to you?"

"Kinda. You have a sort of "strict teacher" air about you. With a pair of glasses, you could complete the look." I pushed up my own for emphasize.

"Thanks, but I'll pass."

"Now, as much as I like talking about myself, don't pretend I'm the only one here who shuts people out. What about you? Are you okay?"

"Well, I have the usual traumas everyone else in our class has. Sometimes I wonder what I could have done differently, to save more people. But other than that, I'm fine."

"I can certainly sympathize with that last one." My coffee wasn't as hot anymore, and there was only a bit left, so I chugged it and set down my mug. "In any case, I gotta admit I didn't come down here to discuss pleasantries with you. I'm here to make an official request."

"Regarding?"

"What else? The investigation into Maki Yugami's true identity. I'm not sure if you heard yet, but she said so herself this morning: Her real name is Alice Kizuki."

"...Alice Kizuki? I do recall she also confirmed she was only half-Japanese, right?"

"Yeah, back before Peko's case."

"But how do we know it's her real name? It could just be another pseudonym she's hiding behind."

"I considered that, but think about it. Celeste herself claimed that she showed tells whenever she called herself Maki Yugami, and that name's so unusual that it's obviously fake. Why have an obvious fake name, and one that's more realistic? Plus, given the context, I just don't think she was lying when she said it."

"...Alright. I'll trust you on this. So, her real name is Alice Kizuki. Does this mean anything to you?"

"That all depends on what happens next. Evidence is everything, right? I need more data before I can come to a conclusion.

"What's your request?"

I leaned forward. "I want you to contact your grandfather. Ask him to send us any and all of the Future Foundation's files regarding Toshihide Tomonaga and his research."


We're moving onto chapter 4 territory now! Maki's going to be depressed, Mechamaru's probably going to be depressed because his athlete's dead, and Hiyoko's still alive! Truly, this is the darkest timeline. The good news is, not a lot happens during chapter 4 besides free time, so I'll probably try to focus more on Maki's interactions with the survivors, and just some general character development. Also, it seems Albert has a lead, an idea on who this Alice Kizuki might really be. Hopefully, he can find out quickly and end this nightmare before it claims anymore lives. Not likely, though.

Survivors-10: Maki Yugami, Hajime Hinata, Byakuya Togami, Chiaki Nanami, Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu, Gundham Tanaka, Hiyoko Saionji, Nagito Komaeda, Nekomaru Nidai, Sonia Nevermind

Victims-7: Teruteru Hanamura, Kazuichi Soda, Mahiru Koizumi, Peko Pekoyama, Akane Owari, Ibuki Mioda, Mikan Tsumiki

In the next chapter, the killing game shall continue, and we'll explore the next island.