"El, can you take Noah to the mall for me?" Olivia appears out of Noah's room shutting the door behind her and shaking her head.
"Yeah sure" he tips the final crumbs from the chips bag into his mouth and flicks the sports channel off the TV. "What's up? What does he need?" he asks her inquisitively.
Throwing her hands in the air she lets out an exasperated gasp "I have no idea, all I'm getting out of him is grunts and barks. His room is upside down. Clothes everywhere, I asked him to pick them up and he shouted something about not having the top he wanted to be washed... so now apparently he has nothing to wear." she looks to Elliot for reassurance but instead is met with a look of I told you so.. "What? She defensively asks
"I did offer to do the laundry the other day but you were in a mood with me remember?" He leans in and places a gentle kiss against her temple. "You said you could manage to clean your own children's clothes."
"Yeah, I did say that" She rolls her eyes remembering her own stubbornness " You Elliot Stabler are flirting with danger bringing that back up again" she purses her lips and goes to playfully jab him in the chest but Elliot catches her hand and holds onto it.
"It's only because I like being dangerous with you Olivia Stabler" he wraps his arms around her and pulls her in for a kiss.
"Daddy…..you're always kissing mommy." Evie runs over and throws her arms around Olivia's leg "She's myyyyyy mommy." Throwing her best frowny face over to Elliot she pouts her lips out.
"You know what Kiwi? you look just like Mommy when you pull that face" Elliot teases as he looks between his two girls who are now most definitely pulling the same expression.
"Well, I like looking like Mommy." Evie confidently confirms placing her hands on her hips.
"And, I love looking like my Evie" Olivia smiles towards her young daughter and holds the palm of her hand up to encourage a high five. "Team girls" Olivia shouts when Evie slaps against her hands
"Yeah, team girls" she giggles, taking position her newly learned favorite Captain Marvel superhero pose.
Noah enters the room slamming his bedroom door behind him "Yeah well I'm team guys" his sullen voice changing the happy tempo in the room "because at least dad wouldn't agree to wash my top and then just not care"
"Oh Noah, I'm sorry. I didn't not care, I just..."
"Was at work" he finishes her sentence "yeah I get it Mom but it was just one top and tonight is a big deal" he huffs, snatching his cap off the rack he checks his pockets for his phone and wallet
"Dad? You good to drive me?"
"Sure kid, let's go" Elliot sympathizes, leaning in to kiss Olivia on the cheek he whispers to her "kids good with the guilt trip huh?"
Closing her eyes and screwing her face up, she whispers back "you're telling me"
"Ok Captain Evie Kiwi. You gotta hug for daddy before I go?" he holds his arms out already expecting her to leap into them; like always.
"I love you, Daddy...Mommy says I'm just like you when I don't tidy my room..so see, I'm like you and mommy" she attempts to compliment him
"Oh does she now?" he quizzes her whilst eyeing his wife who has covered her hands over her face
"Whoops" Olivia laughs "Ok, so you guys get going, I'm sure you'll find something to wear that you'll LOVE Noah"
Her affectionate smile is wasted in this particular moment nevertheless she's offering it anyway.
Three hours and 23 minutes later Elliot and Noah walked through the door and it was three hours and 23 minutes of complete 'mom guilt' over Noah. Olivia knew it was just a top and in the past, she would have told Noah he was being slightly dramatic and to pick something else to wear but given the heartbreak, he endured a couple of months ago when Leah -'We don't say her name out loud' Spencer cancelled on him last minute to date someone else, Olivia felt like his attitude deserved a pass.
When he and Elliot came back, Noah had flown to his room shouting something about rushed timings, a quick apology for snapping earlier and then disappeared entirely for the next 45 minutes.
Eventually resurfacing he stands tall in front of his parents and sister, who are all intensely absorbed in watching some new brightly colored animation movie.
"Well... This look ok?" he asks flailing his arms by his side
"I like it" Elliot offers an approving head nod noticing the maintained new hairstyle pairing well with a plain white tee, plaid red and black shirt, ripped at the knee jeans and those extortionately overpriced white sneakers; that had caused an argument with Olivia at Christmas time. Elliot was forever being reprimanded by Olivia for spoiling the kids.
"You look soooo cool Noah Noo" Evie piped up
"Huh Kiwi- no goofy remark?" he suspiciously scans her reaction
"Nope, nope, nope" she sang while dramatically swinging her head from side to side "you look good"
"Who are you and what have you done with Evie?" Noah replied
Evie walks towards him arms stiffly out front, tight, heavy legs and eyes pinged wide open
"I am an ultra-bot I have taken your sister"
"Ok, out the way ultra-bot" Olivia jokes swooping her hand across Evie's face and playfully pushing her back. "Noah you look very handsome. My sweet boy, I'm so proud of you" She grips him in for a hug.
"Erm- yeah thanks Mom but I better go" he awkwardly shifts his attention to look anywhere other than at his mother right now "Let's hope this one doesn't stand me up as Leah did" he jokes
A pang in her chest exhibits her protective mothering instincts kicking in "You want me to drop you off?" Feeling hopeful to get a spy on this new girl they know nothing about "I don't mind"
"No mom- it's honestly... not cool to get dropped off by the Police Chief- everyone gets all awkward even when they aren't doing anything wrong., it just kinda ruins the buzz abit... Anyway, love you all. Bye," he insists quickly leaving before she can object.
"OOOOOhhh you got burned Mommy" Evie giggles, taking handfuls of popcorn and spilling the excess that she can't hold all over the floor.
"I think I just did, didn't I?" she lightheartedly realizes.
Elliot grins over towards Olivia "Don't worry about it Liv... Do you remember how anxious you were when we finally had our first date?" ……
*Dec 11th 2021
Over 22 years of what if's, dreams, hidden messages tucked away in their voices and warm accidental touches all accumulating to this one night.
When Elliot had left she realized that this person who she knew to be her greatest strength was also her ultimate weakness. The love she had for him hit quickly and instantly running deep. He was married, he had commitments, responsibilities, loyalties and he was honorable to them all. A quality that made Olivia fall for him in the first place simultaneously made her decision early on that they were never to be.
It was a well-known sad truth; so many people in this world are in love and yet, not together and so many people in this world are together but yet, not in love.
So... she loved him from afar and the painful associations of needing to do that are usually because said person is either toxic for you, you're not good for each other or because the other person quite simply, doesn't love you back. Elliot Stabler- he was none of those things and the cruelty of the whole situation was that they both knew they were absolutely, positively, in another life; made for each other.
Then the stars aligned, the wind changed, destiny prevailed- whatever was most applicable to the inexplicable circumstances that reunited them and here she was, stood directly in front of the glistening lights of New York's holiday beacon waiting for her date.
The Rockefeller Christmas Tree was 75ft of dazzling Christmas beauty wrapped top to tail in an abundance of 50,000 sparkling lights. A striking Swarovski crystal held the prime position at the top and a nearby band played out all favorite Christmas music.
Olivia's black shapely fitted dress which perfected all of her curves was covered by a tailored double-breasted, white woollen overcoat. Her black Louboutin shoes matched perfectly with her bag. Her freshly blow-dried hair from the salon fell elegantly around her high cheekbones and the smoky bronzed makeup commanded all attention on her naturally dark eyes.
Looking around she could witness the cool chill in the air being met with cheery enthusiasm, the shops and Christmas markets were filled with happy, appreciative faces but overall, the most important face she really wanted to see was walking straight towards her.
The clichéd first date butterflies hit her as if she hadn't known this man for decades, as if she didn't have 22 years of pent up anticipation and want for this moment. Catching sight of him caused her to unnecessarily panic; what would they talk about? Would they connect like they used to? Had she changed too much from the Olivia he used to know?
Her spiralling mind causing a tightness within her chest, she felt hot and flustered her hand needing to take the stability of the barrier in front of her.
"Liv" the way he says her name is different now, there's a different context and world of opportunity behind her nickname.
"Liv?" he repeats
His calming, caring tone instantly grounds her racing fears "Sorry I was…. distracted, all of this, Its all so wonderful at Christmas isn't it?" she deflects looking at their surroundings.
"It is but Liv, you look amazing... I can't see anything past you" he smiles towards her.
"Smooth, Stabler, Smooth" she laughs instantly falling back into their rhythm from years ago "You look really good El, I love this new look" she draws her eyes over his tailored grey coat, he looks smart, sophisticated and strong. His blue eyes piercing through the evening lights always could forever draw her in.
"Shall we go?" he asks, placing his hand on the small of her back he notices her distraction and worrying something is wrong he tries to get her attention "Liv?"
"Sorry, it's just ...in all the years I've lived in this city. I've not once stopped and looked at this tree. I've passed it, seen it many a time but I've never really looked at it, I've never had this moment. This ermmmm…."
"Movie moment? He asks her.
"Exactly" she smiles "This movie moment"
There was a peaceful, comfortable silence between the two and when he laced his fingers through hers everything around them went out of focus, it was as if every part of themselves entirely focused on the other and the old but unfamiliar intimacy between them.
Drawing his attention away first, Elliot took a small gulp and softly attempted to compose his words
"I Love you Liv and you know why I left Liv? I just-"
Olivia stroked her thumb across his hand before softly interrupting him
"El.. don't. Not now. I feel like we've had this conversation over and over. I don't want it to be the main factor of our relationship..friendship. Whatever this could be."
She turns to look at him, hoping he can understand her request "I don't want it to keep coming back up. I love you with my whole being and we haven't even had this first date yet, You are here now for me. For us. This is hopefully the start of the rest of our lives, let's just enjoy this and be us."
Looping her arms through his she pulls him closer to her "So.. you wouldn't tell me what you had planned for this evening, Do I get to know now?"
"How about a real dinner? A real restaurant, not a sports bar for after-work drinks. Not a swing club" He stops talking when he notices her screw up her face and giggle
"Wow El, you remember that case?" she quizzes him
"Remember that case? Are you kidding me? I'll never forget that dress"
"Oh yes from that erm... What was she called again? Cass...Cassandra?" she shoots him a sideways glance
"Yeah that Cassandra was so Ho" he stops in his tracks, observing her raised eyebrow and pulls her in front of him placing his hands on her hips "I'm joking.. I meant Your dress Olivia" he confirms
"My dress huh? Well... If I recall you played your part very well in that club. You know, by keeping your attentions elsewhere" she moves her body closer into his and the close proximity of their bodies causes her cheeks to flush a dark pink
"Oh Olivia Benson, am I finally getting a bit of jealousy from you?" His words are met by her glancing up to look into his eyes
"Yeah … right" she mocks him, knowing all too well she was, in fact; very jealous of Elliot's interactions with not only Cassandra but also many other women over the years.
"Yeah I should be so lucky" he whispers as he slowly moves his lips down the side of her face, the warm steadying breaths from his mouth induces her to close her eyes and sink herself into his touch. He slowly presses his lips against hers, delicately moving them together she allows a low moan to escape. Momentarily freezing he pulls back "Sorry, Liv. I didn't mean to.. was that ok?"
Taking a deep breath she cups his face into her hands and presses her forehead against his "Kiss me again" she commands, her voice a hoarse whisper.
Moving her hands, he eagerly draws back to her lips increasing the delicate brush into an intimate hungry caress, his hand entwining through the back of her hair as they deepen their embrace only adds to the insatiable need she has for him for now.
Guiding her hands across his shoulders she begins to move down his torso and it is only then that the realization that they are stood in the middle of the street comes into focus and she breaks off their long and complete kiss.
Releasing a bashful chuckle she looks around as Elliot straightens himself up
"Wow" he breathes out
"Wow," she repeats pausing to send him a look of complete adoration "So. I don't know where we're going… but I suppose I'll just follow your lead?"
"Tonight really is a night for firsts" he jests "When have you ever followed my lead?" he continues before placing his hands into the inner pocket of his jacket and pulls out two old fashioned theatre tickets. E-Tickets just didn't have the same feel.
"You once told me you wished you could have seen West Side Story on broadway so I asked Fin, he said hadn't seen it yet…. So I thought it would be nice to see together"
"Aww El, that's so sweet. You are special, you know that." she wraps her hands around his neck and squeezes him in close.
-
Watching the performance Olivia felt the deeply relatable pang in her heart to the song 'Somewhere' Elliot must have felt the same because he leant his arm over and rested it on her knee. Wiping away her tears she gripped onto his hand and squeezed it tightly. The words and the true meaning of the song creating a 'written in the stars' type of feel over their own life story.
A song that defines the power of true love, the belief that two individuals can go up against all forces trying to tear them apart and yet: still believe and know that there is a place for their love.
*Present Day
"I remember exactly how I felt" Olivia answers him, It was everything I ever could have dreamt it to be. It's where we found our song, remember?"
"Our Wedding song" he replies.
