Sakura im having hear burn what so i do

You cant get reflux thats a real world problem

But slaura i swear my throat is all gross and burning

Are you sure you didnt just fucking eat a poisonous frog again

The first time was curiosity the second time was a mistake i swear okay now help me out

No way to help you

Whats that supposed to mean

Youre going to die naruto

What!

If you really have acid reflux right bow then youre going toblow up at exactly 3

What? Am or pm?

Thats not up to me to deside

How the fuck? What?

Have you ever seen a turtle in a turtleneck sweater naruto?

What? Wait wait wait am i really going to die?

Without a doubt. Now answer the question

No?

Thats a shame because then you would have had the cure

Sakura what is going on? My throat is burning even more now?

Its all coming together meme

Sasuke!

What is it dobe

Sakuras lost it!

And?

She said im fucking dying!

If she said it then its probably true

Sasuke you fucking ass ahole! Fucking help me here!

Hn

Dont just say hn do something!

*Slaps naruto*

What was that for?

You told me to do something

Yeah but not to slap me!

I heard that gets rid of heartburn

Slapping people?

You caught me i just wanted an excuse to smack you

Goddamn kt sasuke

But now... Im going tosmack you... Likethis...

Sasuke what are yo- mmmm hmmm? Mmmmm? Mmmm... Mmmmmm... Mmmmm! Mmmm! Mmmmm-

Stop. Hammer time

Musicalinterlude

Can i join in guys?

Shut the fuck up salura im dying and im finally making out with sasuke go die in a ditch

Whoa naruto...

What now?

*Points to shikamaru whos been standing there this whole time and is now crying*

Naruto... How could you... Sarubtobi sama...

Oh god oh god oh no shikamaru im so sorry

No! Its too late! Ive heard enough !

I didnt even see you standing there i- wait asuma didnt die in a ditch hidan did

Oh yeah

Um

Uhhhhh yeah okay so i guess we sont have a problem

Okay? Um? Hey do you know where choji is by any chance?

Naruto... Are you joking?

No...

Of course i know where choji is. Hes buying condoms at the laundromat. Which is located inside my balls

Wut

Choji cmon out here boy

*A pitch black dust devil rolls out of his pants carrying two pennies and a bowed ribbon*

Now choji do what daddy showed you earlier

Um shikamaru...

*The dust devil starts twearking. Violently. The earth quakes in the ground. Shake shake shake senrta dhake your body righ*
Shikamaru how did you know

Ive always known natuto... Ive always known ;)

Oh shikamaru!

What the actual fuck is going on

Oh sasuke i forgot you were there... Here let me introduce you. This is shikamaru

Naruto. We went to school together. I know shikamaru personally.

And yet you didnt know he had a weakness against twearking chojis hmm?

Shikamaru what the fuck

No sasuke YOU what the fuck!

Im leaving the village again i remember why i did it in the first place

Sasuke wait!

Youve got to be kidding me

Sasuke... Dont leave again... I just had my period... What am i supposed to do without you?

Sakura i am literally this close to losing it stop with the tom fuckery and let me go

Ill never let you go john

Im sorry WHAT?

NO! I FIDNT! oh god... Oh god bo ...

What the fuck is going on holy

I guess its only fair boe that you know the truth

What?

Everytime we bangeded together. You know the rollypolly ollie fuck festival downtown meladrama. The bump ugly. The tin roof. We... I was thinking of him the shole time. I was think of him sasuke

I literally havent touched you in like 5 years you are actually insane

If im so insane then explain this!

*A monkry dressed in genin style sasukes closed with his headband drooping over his eyes*
You meam youll just walk away from this!

I must bavenever left itachis genjustu this is

I breast fed him until he was seven sasuke! SEVEN!

SeVeN daid the monkey

This os getting too unwieldy to comprehend lets end the story

I was going ti get ro a part where the monkey and the dust ball thing started twerking on each others butts and then sakura and naruto would cry in proud parent mode and then sasuke would just walk away sick to his stomacj and then shakmaruo would just be standing in the corner t posing thnku happyfathers day every1

6/20/21