Chapter 14

"Before I die I want make my parents proud, be happy with myself, embrace my flaws, score straight A's and fall madly in love with someone."

-Unknown

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June 8th, 2022

Dear Dean:

Amazing things have happened since I last wrote you a letter. I went to Jody's place and Gen came with me. I explained our story and announced we were expecting a baby. Jody jumped on me with teary eyes!

Claire, being Claire, told me I was way too old to have a baby, but she was still happy for me. Alex hugged me, and so did Kaia. She told me she was scared of having her own little family in the future, but I explained to her that so did I. I believe she can still have a normal life after everything that has happened to her. I'm the living proof of that.

If I learned something from this past year and a half, is that nothing never really ends. You still move, because your soul forces you to do so. It seeks happiness, or something that makes you feel alive again. I don't know how to explain it, but the world keeps going and it steals a smile from you every now and then, even when the person that was your weak spot is not by your side anymore. The wound I have will not heal, but I am managing to learn how to live with it.

As I mentioned before, everything is starting to make sense. I am feeling things I have not been able to understand ever before in my entire life, and I wish you could see them with me. Miracle is really enjoying the happiness floating in the air as well. It sounds silly, but I bought him a dog friendly cake for his fifth birthday. He is not a puppy anymore, but I can still see the spark of life in his eyes. A life he enjoys because you gave him a second chance. I'm not the only one who is thankful here. In my case, I want to say thank you for saving my life every time you could have gave in and make Chuck happy by following his creepy final scripts for us.

Garth was not home when I called him, but I still told him the news by phone. He was actually surprised in a weird way. I asked him why he reacted like that, and he explained that he didn't expect me to have the life I am living right now. About to get married and becoming a parent. Studying to become a teacher, and things I am dreaming of doing in the near future.

I just realized I called her by her nickname. I call her like that these days.

The baby is as healthy as it can be. Her belly is growing by the day now. It's impressing to see how much you can love a growing tiny human being, even when you don't know him/her in person yet.

I don't want to go all cheesy with all of this silly things, but we moved to a new place, and having a human being who I live with every day of my life feels nice. We are in a new place, so we can create new memories together and leave our bad experiences behind.

She is not you, nor I want her to replace you, but she's fierce and a little bossy when she sees me lost within myself. Sometimes I think I don't deserve what I have, but then, as if she could read my mind, she tells me she loves me and places my hand on her belly. I can feel the baby move, kicking and alive.

We are going to find out the baby's gender next week. I cannot wait to know if it is a girl or a boy. We talked about this with Genevieve, and she told me that if the baby is a boy, I will pick the names on my own.

If it is a girl, she is going to be the one choosing the names.

I didn't tell anyone about the different names I have in mind. One keeps popping up, and it hurts to think about it. I know you are reading this somehow, so I will come clean with you.

If the baby is a boy, his name is gonna be Dean Robert Winchester.

People generally name their kids after their parents, and you were the one that changed my diapers and carried me when I was falling down. You were my dad, mom and big brother. Whenever I say your name, a certain weight comes along with it. Sadness and anger that is justified by how your life ended. I allowed you to go, but my heart is still attached to the guilt of being forced to say those words too soon. I was not ready, yet I looked you in the eyes as you asked me to, and said everything was going to be okay. You needed to hear that, and I needed to make you seem that I could do this without you. It was a lie. I still need you. I always will, no matter how old I get. You still are my big brother, wherever you are with the Impala right now.

I'm sure heaven suits you good. You can be a gentle man when you want to avoid getting in trouble. I know you.

I truly hope you didn't see me after you passed away in that barn. I never felt so broken and hurt until the moment you were truly gone, and the weight of your body against mine made the moment feel real. It was not a nightmare. It was the end. Your end. Our end too, in some weird way.

I want to be able to say your name with joy and happiness again. Maybe it is a little selfish from my part, but I will do it anyways. If I have a son, I'm going to make sure he, as Dean Winchester Junior, has a nice and happy life. He or she will know how to hunt if it is necessary, but I will try to have a safe life for as long as I can sustain it. Erik, Camille and Genevieve think the same way I do.

I want my kid to call me "Dad", and not "Sir", as we called our dad. You would have done the same thing if you were in my shoes. I know it.

I got to go to work, Jerk. I promise I will write again soon.

Love you, big brother.

Sammy.

Author's Note: Hey guys! It's 5 AM and I couldn't sleep. I will try to update this story ASAP, but have patience with me for now. I just started college. Law school to be exact. I am loving it!

Sounds familiar? Lol

Maybe my big sis will pick me up and we will start hunting together. Sorry. It is a bad joke :)

Last but not least, thank you for the loving reviews! I hope I can hear your opinions on this new chapter soon! See you sometime soon

KW.-