"Oh Helen, I hope you'll forgive the looks of our place. It's such a sight!" Gilbertha told her sister in law. She was at the Bardrick's place for tea, coffee and breakfast cake one morning, after Helen had made breakfast for Eddie and he went to sleep. He was working nights at the White House Biscuit company. Anyway, Eddie let her go over to his sister's place for a visit. "I think I'm nearly ready for our move next week though." Boxes of their things were packed everywhere in the place.

"That's good." Helen smiled. "I hope it hasn't been too hard on you though."

"Oh, I'm fine…." Bert smiled, leaning forward a little, holding her warm cup of tea with both hands on a quite chilly morning. "Paul wants to leave as soon as we can….doesn't want me too far along in this pregnancy to travel…..He helps me with packing things almost every night."

Helen chuckled a little ."Well, you're a only a few months behind me, I'm sure you'll have enough time."

"Yes!" Bert brightened up, her brown eyes shining. "How are you doing? Have you felt any movement yet?" it was so exciting to be pregnant the same time as her sister in law, Bert thought. She was happy she had someone to talk about this phase of life with. It was bittersweet to be leaving, because she would be away from family when her and Paul's little bundle of joy would make their arrival.

Helen laughed a little and blinked her eyes. "I'm not so sure, I don't really know what it feels like! I asked Mama the other day and she tried to explain it…but….oh I don't know….I'm all nerves when anything new happens! Maybe I am….I don't know. "

"I wouldn't worry over it….just enjoy each new thing. I am,….besides the sickness of course!" Bert laughed and so did Helen. "Have you and my little brother picked any names yet?"

Helen smiled yet rolled her chocolate brown eyes. "Not yet….Eddie's been so busy with work lately and he's exhausted when he comes home in the morning, the poor dear."

Bert nodded understandingly. "Paul and I have…..ever since last time…um." She sniffled, trying not to cry. Helen looked sympathetic and concerned for her and rubbed her sister-in-law's arm a little.

"Say no more…."Helen smiled. "Tell me your names you have picked out!"

"If we have a boy, Ivan Paul. Sort of has a ring to it, huh? And Paul's middle name is Ivor, so it's a bit close to that…..I love the name Ivan better though…" Bert smiled widely and dreamily sighed. "If a girl….we both like Charlotte Theresa." She beamed. "Theresa's my middle name, you know."

"Those are some adorable names. Cute as a bug's ear!… I might have to steal them!" Helen teased and the young women both laughed.

"Just use anything but Gilbertha!" Bert said and cracked up laughing, which made them laugh harder. "Or I might have to come back and haunt you..." She joked... "Here, I'll go get my baby name book!" she said, heading into the bedroom. "Paul was so excited he rushed out to buy it first chance he got." She came back with the 1930's book, "What Shall We Name the Baby?" Bert passed the book off to her sister-in-law and went to the door as she heard a knocking. "Oh, Mr. Lay! Hi…" She said as she had answered the front door. "Oh I would've taken her home, I'm driving now….Paul's taught me how. He just bought us a little car too.."

"I didn't know. Good for you! I almost couldn't find your place, I'm not used to this part of town, being a North End-er and all. " Fred smiled. He turned to his nearly 21 year old daughter. "Eddie called. Wanted to make sure you got home, O.K.. You ready?"

"I'll be right there. Just let me grab my coat, Papa. Bert, I'll give you your book back at Mass on Sunday"

"Oh, no you won't! "Bert smiled. "Take all the time you need with it. You can mail it to me!"

"Thanks again!" Helen called over her shoulder, as Bert showed them out the door and to the car. She smiled, waving them goodbye. After she saw the Model T. Ford coast down the street and turned the corner, Bert went inside and started on washing her breakfast dishes.

She didn't feel very good a little while later and so she thought to sit down awhile. Later Bert started to feel worse. She sat there thinking it would pass, trembling a little. Tears came out of her eyes and she sat there with eyes shut tight, hands on her little belly. "Ouch….owwwwugh." she moaned a little and her breathing started getting rougher. "Oooohhhuh…." She lay her head back, sat in the kitchen chair and breathed. "Darn it. Not again….." Bert gasped to breathe and soon discovered her familiar horror. "I'm bleeding!…..I'm bleeding, oh God, not again. I can't go through this again!" she gasped and started to cry and panic was starting to set in from her pain and the bleeding. Pain was in her back and lower stomach and continued down. Her eyes locked to the phone and she went to it and dialed a number. "Paul…Paul, can you come home quick?! Please?" She stood there against the wall, breathing scared breaths and listened to her husband on the other end of the line. "I think it's happening again…." She cried and shut her eyes and gritted her teeth but tears slid down her cheeks. "I don't know. ….No, I haven't called the doctor yet. I wanted to call you first!" her voice raised in tone a touch. "Paul, I'm scared!….." her voice shook and she felt perhaps she was shaking now too. From fear?

"C-can you see if they'll let you off early?...YES." her voice stressed. "Yes!…I'll call the doctor and go lay down. ….just please come home as soon as you can!….I don't want to be all alone if I'm going to lose this baby too…." Bert started to cry again, but Paul tried to calm her over the telephone. "I'm so, sc-scared, Paul!" She soon hung up with him, dialed the doctor's number and went and lay down awhile and waited for them both to get there. "God…..please…." She whispered,, weeping while laying down on the bed, with her hands on her middle. Her tears making a silent prayer to the One Up Above


"Anywhere you need me to take you before you go home?" Fred asked his daughter on the ride to Helen and Eddie's little brick house next to the Antique shop.

"Sure Papa. I need to pick up some meat and other things for supper tonight."

"You got enough cash on you? I can cover it if you need me to. " He softly told her. "You getting enough to eat?" he wondered. "Which reminds me,… your Mama baked an extra loaf of bread and made some grape jelly the other day we want to give you two. Picked some fresh mulberries and pears today too."

"Thank you Papa, but we're doing okay. Really."

"Money's tight and things are getting tougher…." Fred said quietly, a slight frustration in his voice. "You're eating for two…maybe three…." He joked with his daughter about maybe having twins and winked at her. He grinned at her to see her reaction, and his jaw jutted to the side. "Just want to make sure you're well fed these days…."

"I eat just fine, don't you worry." She laughed. "Feels like I'm always hungry and always eating! I don't know how much weight I've gained yet. " she changed the subject. "These tough times brought on us….it's all Hoover's fault! I'm glad I voted for Roosevelt." She said proudly. "He seems to really want to DO something! What do you think?"

Fred sat there driving his Model T, with a furrowed brow and thought a second. "I don't know, dear. Politicians I think are all the same. They all promise good things. Good intentions….but its mighty hard to bring those things into happening. I'm behind President Roosevelt though, he is the President now. Let's just hope he steers this Great Country in the right direction. Something needs to be done! But we can help by each doing our little part and sticking behind the man. I'm glad he's in and not me!" Fred chuckled.

Helen spoke up about the old fashioned large Concord grapes that were on her parents' property. Out back behind the house, near the woods and a little ways over to the left was the little garden plot too. Fred would make his own wine and they would have grape juice, and if it was a really bumper crop, they would have grapes to eat and make grape jelly. Their skin was a dark purple, almost black and the grape was a greenish, squishy, slightly sour fruit depending on when you picked them.

"I haven't made wine since a couple crops ago!" Fred said. "Your mother wanted half of it canned and some left whole and fresh…..we'll make juice the next crop. I agree with her. Very frugal and wise to do….I can spare my wine a little." He smiled and parked outside the little grocery store Helen shopped at. "Here…" Fred insisted. He slipped some cold hard cash into her hand.

"Papa!"

"Sweetheart, go buy a nice cut of meat for you and your husband. A ham for Sunday dinner? Something….please…." Fred would not take no for an answer! That was his little girl….and his unborn grandchild she was carrying within her….and Fred worried about them and wanted to make sure they had a good start.

"Then you and Mama are coming over for supper Sunday!" She stared at him with her daring brown eyes. She was just as stubborn as her father...and her mother. Helen went inside to shop and Fred waited for her till she was done. Fred got out of the car and grabbed her brown paper grocery bags, and opened the car door for her. "And if Eddie says anything,... tell him the truth. I gave you the money. My idea." Fred told his daughter when he dropped her off at her little house. He carried the groceries in for her and also the jars of grape jelly, baskets of mulberries and pears and a large loaf of bread they wanted them to have. "Enjoy your supper….and can't wait for that ham on Sunday!" he grinned with a gleam in his gray eyes. "Take care of yourself and my grandson!" Fred winked. "Hope that little crumb-grabber's born on my birthday!"

Helen chuckled at her father, laying a hand on her belly. "Grandson….or granddaughter…." She corrected. She beamed, looking at him.

"I already have a granddaughter. I want a grandson! Or two." Fred smirked. "Or three." He chuckled.

Helen went over and hugged her daddy. "I guess I'd try my best , to shoot for September 30th, Papa…..but I am due in August...if I could control it, I would!" She laughed and looked up at him. Her gaze glanced to the table with all the jars of grape jelly, fruit and bread that was given to the struggling couple. "You're too good to us,….thank you…." She said, with the tears welling up.

"Your mother and I both agree, we'll give when we can…..I was really worried for you two at first. Eddie not having a job after the crash of '29….I'm glad he got in with the C.C.C and was doing something at least before you married just a few months ago (January 30, 1935)..…..and I'm glad he has that job now too….You're both so young!..." He started to say….

"We're doing as good as we can…..Well, I'll let you go Papa. I should get started on getting these groceries put away and supper ready."

"Need some help?" Fred offered.

"No, I've got it….but thanks. And thanks for the rides here and there ..with Eddie not having a car yet. He's grateful for the rides to work too in this weather." she smiled.

"Will I need to bring in him to work tonight again?" he asked.

"No, but thank you Papa. His dad is taking him tonight" Helen replied. "He so wishes he could get a car!"

"He will someday…" her father told her encouragingly. Fred soon left and went home to his home on Peru Road he built in the 1920's and Helen put the groceries away and started on fixing supper for herself and Eddie. She sliced up some mushrooms to fry, fixed a greens salad with oil and salt and pepper and lemon juice for a simple dressing and lastly she put very thin sliced steaks to fry in a cast iron skillet. She cut up a pear or two and tossed it with some of the mulberries. She thought the fresh fruit would just have to do as a nice little side dish or dessert. Eddie came into the kitchen in the evening. He had been sleeping all day long. He would go to work after they were done with their little supper.

"Good evening, Honeybuns…." Helen smiled at him, setting his humble meal in front of him. "Or should I say good morning to you? It is your morning."

He grunted, nodded and rubbed his face with his hands. "Morning I guess…..what the hell ever!" Eddie groaned. "What's for supper?"

"Thin steaks with gravy, fried mushrooms, salad greens….."

"Helen,…Baby, I can't afford all that all the time! Why are you buying such expensive meat?! Do you even have any money left of what I gave you earlier this week?"

"I do have a little left….Papa gave me some money. He insisted I take it." She started to confess.

"You bought pears too? And are those blackberries?! Babe….this is…."

"They're mulberries and Mama and Papa gave them to us. The pears too….and bread."

"What?!" he snapped at her. He was cranky from working the night before and sleeping all day. He wasn't quite used to the night shift yet. "They think I can't support you on my own?! Dawgone it , I'm trying!"

" I know, honey! They just want to help us out!...besides, your parents bought us a stupid radio!" she raised her voice a little at him.

"That's different! We have to have something to do in our free time, in this place.…. This is about food now! I'm the one who's supposed to bring home the bacon...and another thing, I told you to serve me the smaller portion! You need the food more than I do,…Eat, damn it!" he raised his voice, slamming the plate down with the larger portion, in front of her. Which made her jump.

"Eddie, you're working long hard hours….you need the sustenance….And what's wrong with my parents'…. " She started to say but he cut her off.

"Gosh all fish-hooks, Helen!..."Eddie swore. "They should know I can provide for you…"

"There's nothing wrong with a little help, Bunnie!" Helen raised her voice, in order to be heard,…and she was angry as he was.

"I'm your husband! I'M the one who's supposed to support you!" He yelled. "if you're so accepting of them doing it still ….why don't you just go back home to them?!"

"Oh Eddie…."Her voice choked and she started to cry. "Eddie, you don't mean that!…." And she ran into their bedroom in tears and slammed the door. He put his head down as he heard her sobbing. It was their first fight as a married couple. Eddie stared at his full plate of supper and shoved it away and got up. He walked out the front door for some air. He came back in a few minutes later and sat down in the tiny living room, with his big chair and Helen's little rocking chair by the radio. He could still hear his wife crying in the other room. He saw a letter addressed to him by a Rev. Edwin O. Rossmaessler, an Episcopalian priest friend of his. His eyes skimmed the letter and fell upon the words, "….but I suppose you two lovers care for nothing except that stars fell on Alabama….."

"No, Edwin, we're having our first fight…"Eddie sighed and thought out loud but decided to continue reading.

"Has the happy event taken place yet? Now, one of your sons you must name Edwin, for of course you are going to have about five boys and three girls….."Eddie grinned a little and stuck the letter back into the envelope to show Helen later and put the letter into his pocket. He thought he heard her crying die down so he went to their bedroom door and rapped his knuckles on it softly. "Babe…." He said quietly. He pushed the door open slightly and saw her sitting on the bed with the green wool blanket on it. Hiccupping and sniffling and drying her tear-stained face with a hanky. "I'm all wet (no good)…..the way I treated you…..Babe, I'm sorry. ….I'm such a crumb (loser).

"No you're not….." Helen said softly but her voice shook a bit and she felt tears well up in her eyes again. "I shouldn't have spoken the way I did to you. I'm so sorry, Honeybunches!" she felt his strong arms around her and she lay her head on his broad chest and cried. "I want to be a good little wifey to you!…." Her chest heaved with crying. "There's just so much for us to think about right now, honey! Money, food…..the baby….." Helen started to cry again held him close to her. "I love him already and I don't even know him yet!" she said looking down at her growing bump. She gazed up at her husband with love. "He's a part of me and a part of you….oh Eddie, I….I love you so much!" she sat there a long while crying into his chest. "I don't know why I'm crying" she said at last. "Oh I'm a foolish little twit!" Helen cried, taking deep breaths and trying to talk. "I think I'm beginning to feel him move…..and it's the weirdest, most beautiful thing I think I've ever felt in my whole life!... I love him already!"

Eddie chuckled, "Him…Her….Them…."

"What?" she looked up at him, with tear stained cheeks.

"Could be twins…" He smiled down at her.

"Why is everyone saying that?!...Is it because of how much weight I'm putting on?!…..I'm getting so fleshy!" Helen started to cry again. "You must think I'm disgusting! " she wailed.

"Now don't unleash Niagara Falls on me again, Babe." Eddie chuckled and pulled out a hanky. "Here…..Blow your nose….Wipe all the stress off your pretty little face."

"Admit it..." Helen's voice quivered. "I'm big already and I'm putting on lots of weight on my chest, my belly, my thighs!. I feel fat! …Honey, we haven't had sex in a month! Don't you love me anymore? !" her voice cracked and she whimpered a little.

His heart broke to hear her say those words. "Of course I love you, Babe. I'm sorry….Honey baby, I've been so busy with work. We're not home together at night…." He kissed her. "I wish things were different right now." Eddie whispered." I'll make it up to you tomorrow, Babe…" he flashed that movie star smile of his at her. She thought he was the most handsome fella she ever saw or met before! Even more handsome than Mr. Cary Grant, she thought.

"You didn't tell me I look beautiful….. " She sniffled and then blew her nose with the hanky.

Eddie chuckled. "Oh you…my honey, honey, honey girl!." He smiled and laughed a little as he wrapped his strong arms around her. "You're one sweet, hot mama." (both sweet mama, and hot mama meant an attractive woman in the 1930's.) Eddie gave her a playful kiss on the lips and grinned that infectious grin at her. "Just think, we'll blink our eyes…and you'll be Mama, and I'll be Papa. Crazy! Eh, What?!" Helen's soft yet daring brown eyes gleamed up at him and Helen felt she was falling in love with this handsome, tan, black haired man all over again. Their loving moment went interrupted as a loud hurried knock came from the front door. Eddie softly ran a hand on her back while he got up and went into the little living room.

"Yikes! It's the Old man…." Eddie said. Eddie's father, John Henry Walbrun was here to pick him up for his night shift at the White House Biscuit Company.

"Oh Eddie! Your supper!...You didn't even get to eat…." Helen followed him into the room.

"Neither did you…..Just wrap it up for me….some bread with those little steaks. I'll eat it cold at work." He said, opening the front door and she rushed into their little kitchen and scrambled to get his food all together. "Dear old Dad!" Eddie smiled at his father.

"Ich habe eine halbe Stunde auf dich gewartet! Du wirst zu spät kommen, Junge!" Mr. Walbrun raised his voice a bit angrily at his 23 year old son, in German. John H. Walbrun didn't speak in English well, so he mostly spoke in German. Translation : "I've been waiting for you for half an hour! You're going to be late, boy!"

"Sorry Father…."Eddie said to him, a bit embarrassed at how his father was treating him. Helen came in and gave him the cold thin steak sandwiches, wrapped in wax paper and a little bowl of the fresh fruit. Helen had given him her cold steak too. She wanted to make sure he had enough meat in his diet. She gave him a peck on the lips and insisted she would eat something in a bit. Helen gave him one last kiss and sent him out the door.


Bert sat on her bed with her husband Paul at her side. He got off work as soon as he could and rushed home with one of the doctors in Dubuque.

"Mrs. Bardrick, I think what you experienced is only a threatened miscarriage…."

"Miscarriage?! …" she became really scared at the sound of that horrible, familiar word. Bert buried her face in her husband's neck and felt tears escape.

"Now, now, now…." The doctor told her gently and touched her arm. "You're O.K. just calm yourself…..you can still resume a healthy pregnancy! Just let me know if the bleeding and pain happen again, and if worse…..Eliminate stress. Take it easy. Don't worry too much…. Also, you let me know if you no longer feel pregnant and I will be right over…." Paul paid the doctor with a little money and a bag of coffee they hadn't opened and the doctor denied Paul giving him a ride home, he decided to walk instead. So he began the trek home.

"Oh Paul!" She cried. He held her and tried to soothe his frightened wife as she started to cry again. "You heard what the doctor said…" Paul whispered, smoothing back soft coal black tendrils of her hair away from her tear stricken, pretty face. "I'll finish packing our things from now on….you just take it easy." He told her softly. His voice was as soft and smooth as butter.


Helen ate a little something for supper and decided to sit down in her rocking chair awhile. She turned on the radio but found nothing entertaining so she switched it off and mended one of Eddie's pairs of pants that had a hole in them. She saw the baby book on the end table and decided to skim through it. She look through girls names. …"Avis…..Oh isn't that pretty? Lucille….Oh what about the nickname Lucee?! That would be so precious. And she could be named after my friend Lucille Graff. She would like that. I'll have to share this name with Eddie tomorrow. " Helen thought out loud and ran a hand across her belly. "What do you think, Baby? Are you a Lucee?" she chuckled and then she swore she almost felt a small, queer fluttering within and her eyes went wide. Helen couldn't help but smile. She skimmed through the boys names and found her father's name, Frederick. Helen smiled and decided then and there the baby would have her father's name for his middle name, if he would be a boy that is. She would mentioned it to Eddie. She wanted it whether he liked it or not though. Helen decided that she and Eddie would decide on a boy first name together, so she closed the book and went back to her mending.


It was very late at night that night at the Lay's house and Fred and Frances were in their own little bedrooms connected by the little walk in closet. They both had gone to bed early, after supper.

Dammit, Jiggs!" Fred huffed. The little terrier dog took up the little space at the bottom of Fred's bed, laying right on his feet. "Git!" The dog barked and ran up and down his bed and sat by Fred's head and gave him tons of licks and paced the bed again. "Let me sleep, dog…" Fred chuckled and then rolled over and accidentally kicked Jiggs, the loyal dog off of the bed. Jiggs was certainly loyal! He never left Fred's side, or Frances' side, when Fred was at work. He followed them everywhere. Not liking being kicked, although on accident, he ran for safety into Frances's warm bed. Fred and Frances couldn't stand each other's snoring anymore…..they still very much loved each other….they just couldn't literally sleep in the same bed or room anymore!

"Oh Jiggs…" Frances stirred a little. "Did Fred kick you out of bed again? You poor furry boy." She sleepily told the dog, yawning and scratching the dog's ears and began petting him. "You can sleep with me…in my bed again…." She said with a huge, sleepy yawn. Frances felt the little dog curl up to her but then a little awhile later, she felt him rise up and run back through the little walk in closet and trudged back into Fred's room. His doggie claws clicking on the hardwood flooring.

"JIGGS!" there came a bellow from Fred and he lit a match and put on a lamp. The noise woke up Frances, of course. "Frances!...That darn dog has my slippers again! That's the 5th time this week!" she heard him holler. He soon saw Frances in the doorway of his bedroom, in her 1930's pink nightie. Her short, plump figure stood there half asleep, but when she woke up a bit and saw Fred's little problem, she tried to stifle a laugh and her brown eyes twinkled with laughter. There was Jiggs in Fred's bed, chewing on his slippers! Then the dog picked up the slippers he was chewing on, and made a beeline for between Frances' feet, and slipped into her room to chew the slippers in peace! Frances started to laugh and soon so did Fred….."I guess that's what I get, huh….but Boy! " Fred laughed.

Frances walked over and leaned down and kissed her husband on the forehead.. "Looks like you'll need new slippers, dear. I don't think I can mend them this time!" she laughed. "I'll have to write a story about this!"

"Yeah, "When Jiggs the Loyal Dog Got Away With Being Naughty." Fred joked after Jiggs came trudging back into Fred's room, hopped up on his bed, put his furry little head on Fred's knee and flashed his little doggie eyes up at him as if to say sorry for all his wrongdoings.

Frances laughed at the dog and her husband, "Honey,…you're a genius! I think I will write about it tomorrow…."

"Would the little Author like to make her husband breakfast?…. Hey, we're both up!"

"At 3 in the morning, I don't think so…." She yawned and laughed, "I'm going to try and go back to bed…till 5am."

"Goodnight, sweetheart. " Fred yawned, himself. "'night Jiggs….you little scamp!" He then heard his wife giggle, then he turned off the gas lamp, rolled over,…Jiggs in the bed or no, Jiggs,...and tried to go back to sleep.

Awhile later, Frances lit her gas lamp, and that woke Fred up again.

"What now, Frances?" he asked, leaning in the doorway, dressed in his striped cotton 1930's pajamas. His pajama top was unbuttoned a bit, his chest full of hair was exposed. He was so hairy, she joked with him sometimes that he looked like a bear!

"Sweetheart, your story idea!" Frances looked at her husband. "I just have to write it!" she sat down at her tiny desk with a pad of yellow lined paper and a pencil, writing and erasing and rewriting away.

Fred stood there with a furrowed brow and he was still so tired. He stared at the little clock on Frances' little desk and saw it was just now going on 5am. "I'll go make myself breakfast….." He said trudging through her bedroom and through the sewing room and into their little L shaped kitchen. And guess who followed him. You guessed it! Jiggs the Loyal Dog. There came a laugh from Frances. "Oh, that's gold!" she laughed, writing down her little story.

Fred chuckled, shaking his head at the little dog. "You want some food, now do you?" He questioned Jiggs. Jiggs sat there with his tail wagging and almost seemed to grin at his Master.

Frances bounded into the kitchen sometime after that..

"Honey, we're out of bacon and eggs…." Fred told her.

"Oh, just have some pears and breakfast cake!"

"We had that yesterday…" He stared at her.

"You'll have to just get used to it'" Frances replied saucily. "we''ll have to do without them until you get paid again…Honey, read this!" Her eyes shone with excitement and Frances gave him the pad of yellow lined paper and he started to read the little story she wrote.

"The Diary of a Naughty, yet Loyal Dog"

Well, I pulled one over on these old timers tonight! I climbed into Master's bed and wanted him to play with me but he was such a party pooper! I guess old timers need their sleep though. One cant sleep much next to this guy though, he snores like a freight train! Oh well... He kicked me off and I ran for safety and comfort into the Nice Lady's bed. I forget her name but she's so nice and sweet and smells like lavender. She uses Yardley's English Lavender soap, her favorite. Sometimes I go downstairs to the basement with her and watch her. I never leave her side, aren't I a good loyal doggie? She lugs the old tin tub for a bath and tries to shoo me out but I still watch her,…. one morning, she floundered around so much I thought she was a seal! Kid you not!...Anyways, I cuddled up to her and tried to sleep, but she's gotten so pillow-y lately, I thought I'd suffocate! Just then I had a brilliant idea, I'll show Master not to be such a stick in the mud! I ran into his bedroom and stole his slippers….again!,! He barked at me a little and I barked back. Why not, I thought? Make a little game of it! But that got boring and I thought, 'well this could go on forever' so I ran back into the Nice Lady's comfy bed, slippers and all.' I'll chew these slippers in peace', I thought! I felt bad about it later though and slumped back into Master's bedroom. I'll give him that cute look, I thought, so I did. That should change his mind about me!…Oh, he's going to breakfast now! I should go see what he''ll make. Maybe I can snag some bacon!"

Fred laughed with glee in his eyes at her cute, funny little story. "What a woman…" he thought. " I swear, you could very well write a children's book."

"Well now, I'm no Laura Ingalls Wilder... She's coming out with a new book this year, you know."

"What's with you poking fun at your weight, now?!" Fred crooned awhile later, putting his arm around her.

"Oh, it's nothing honey!..." she told him, patting his arm. "it's funny and adds to the story!"

"Women!" he muttered, rolling his eyes.

"Don't look at me like that!...I'm not that slim, trim 125 pound, beauty of a lady you fell in love with remember?" Frances stared at him with her hands on her broad hips. "What makes you the expert on women, huh?"

"Oh, I've loved plenty of women in my life…." Fred teased her and mischievously grinned and wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close. "When I was a young man, I loved the most strikingly beautiful young lady with reddish brown hair and a certain feistiness to match, and married her on July 16th, 1912….at ages 26 and 28, I loved the woman who bore me two beautiful children….." Fred's eyes gleamed down at her and he kissed her lovingly on the forehead. "As a man in his early 40's, I loved the woman who grew sick with cancer and stuck by her side through it all…" Tears glistened in his eyes. "In February of 1933, I loved the woman who became a grandmother for the very first time and will be again in just a few months….Now at almost 50 years of age, I love this wonderful woman standing before me and I wish she would love herself and see herself as I do…. You're beautiful, just the way you are, Sweetheart. You're beautiful for being you." Isn't that what real love is? Loving each new version of your special person. Falling in love many times, all with the same person.

Frances had tears in her eyes. "Ever since I had my hysterectomy…and I can't get rid of this weight I've put on...I've felt so unfeminine…"She confessed to him. "Don't tell me you've changed too…." She glared at him.

"but I have, Franziska Catherine…."He said softly. He loved his wife's name he thought, it was beautiful. And she was still beautiful to him too.

"...but you're still a handsome man….it's…different for us women!"

"Not a gray hair in sight…." He smiled at his wife, brushing away a strand of hair.. "I can't say the same for me!" he laughed at himself. He still had a good head of hair, but it had grayed a lot through the years. "Look closer….I'm sure they're there. " Frances said flatly. Fred chuckled at her but brought her close to him and held her. "Change is good….where would we be if nothing changed? We just have to accept certain changes. I'm not the young person I used to be either…." He looked into her pretty brown eyes. "Please know I still think you're beautiful. …I love you."

Frances let out an almost silent laugh and patted him on the shoulder, still in his embrace. "I think you're just saying these things to be nice!"

"Hell no…." Fred looked at her. "Lets go to "bed", Frannie" his eyes gleamed a bit mischievously at her…"my room or yours?!" then he whispered something in her ear.

"Now you're just being naughty!" Her eyes went wide and playfully slapped him. She couldn't help but laugh. "and you've never called me Frannie!"

Fred laughed and hugged her again and looked down at his wife. "How bout it? I mean it when I say I still love you. I should show you more….I would have if I had known you were struggling with this so much…..You're my dear little wifey ."

"Oh alright….don't get too excited…." Frances laughed a little.

Author's Notes: I don't know if the Bardrick's situation in this chapter was true. I think it very well could have and perhaps they never spoke of it as was the time period. They were a most wonderful aunt and uncle to their nieces and nephews, and I believe someone not having children of their own would want to be like a mom and dad figure to their nieces and nephews. …my aunt and uncle were exactly like that. My own mother had trouble keeping pregnancies and suffered miscarriages and stillbirth, so that has to come from some branch of the family tree. Eddie and Helen even had a stillbirth, several years after my grandfather was born. He was a young man when that happened. .. perhaps it comes from the Walbrun side, idk?…. I try to do a lot of research about pregnancy and such….because I want to be informed of what could happen someday for me. It's the most beautiful, yet most scary thing ever…but I still want it someday. I'm sorry if any of you readers have gone through that kind of pain. My heart hurts for you. I know it could easily be myself too someday.

I tried to use 1930's lingo in this chapter. They talked so silly at times. Example, a woman was called a "tomato" along with other things. Lol.

I think both sets of parents helped Eddie and Helen out a lot, so I tried my best to put that in the story, using my imagination of course. I think it was realistic with the Lay's giving them food…..but as for Eddie's parents giving them a radio, I made that up.

I have no idea Eddie and Helen's first fight was about, but considering the times, it very well could have been about money and spending. The hard times coming on them….Her being pregnant with her hormones going wacky…. It could have happened like that!

Jiggs was a little terrier dog the had. I took inspiration from a picture of my great great grandpa Fred, he had his hand on Jiggs, and it looks like Jiggs is sitting on a little roof, with Fred squinting a bit and looks like he's smiling or jutting his jaw slightly. It made me think, "Perhaps Jiggs was a little mischievous!" I remember the back of the photo had said, "Grandfather Lay with Jiggs the Loyal Dog." So my grandpa had written on it.

I love it when older people are still in love,…as for sex, in a way it's like, "Ew they're old!" lol. but hey it's a part of life and it keeps you young they say.

The "floundered around so much I thought it was a seal!" bit was from a little story my great great grandma Frances had written in the 1950s or 60's . She was babysitting a dog named Skippy of Eddie and Helen's or either my Grandpa and Grandma 's when they were first married and my Auntie Cheryl was a baby. Frances was dogsitting, i guess you could say, Skippy and wrote about herself, but in the dogs point of view, saying she was, "very particular as she brought her own soap and towel, etc…perhaps she is afraid of catching an itch that seems to be in this place!" It was such a cute, funny story, "The Diary of an old Dog" I laughed so hard when I read it, so I took a bit of inspiration from that.

So the situation with Fred and Jiggs was made up, but it sure sounds like something Frances would have written. Well, like great great grandmother, like great great granddaughter!

The Rev. Edwin Rossmaessler was a real person and friends with my great grandpa Eddie, there is more to that letter and a bit of interesting info, but I wont mention it... Lucille Graff was a real person, also a friend of my great grandma Helen. ...Lucee is a nickname of one of the residents where I work at, Lucille S., a sweet Jewish lady and I just love her nickname Lucee. Never saw it like that until I met her.

Fred and Frances had separate bedrooms with a walk in closet in between them. Perhaps they snored and couldn't sleep next to each other,… I don't know. Growing up, I thought the walk in closet was the coolest secret passageway! My childhood bedroom I shared with my sister was Fred's bedroom,…my mom sleeps there now. And Frances' room was the room my Grandfather was born in,…my parents' room growing up and is now my dad's bedroom/ham radio room.

Eddie spent a little time In the early 30's looking for work, and spent some time in Canada. He would say, "Eh, what?!" a lot in his letters to Helen. The phrases they used and what they calledeach other in this chapter are taken from their letters.

My grandpa described his grandpa Fred as so hairy he looked like a bear. Perhaps he spent a lot of time in summer working with his shirt off? But my grandpa only knew him with "silver" hair as he called it, so he guessed he was either blond or dark haired as a young man. I think he was probably dark haired judging by their wedding picture. Then again, it was 1912 they were married, so the picture was in black and white….nevertheless, his hair looks dark.

Fred was indeed a kind, caring, loving, wise man, so I can picture him saying those things to his sweet wife, Frances. We read in her diary once she had to buy pills for anxiety and depression, and we think it could have been because she was dieting a lot but couldn't keep the weight off.. ..or because it was only a few years before she wrote that, that her husband had passed away. She would always mention him on his death date or his birthday. Often saying "unforgettable " so perhaps that has some to do with her depression, …still missing him perhaps? No way to know though.