"No, Mother…No, I haven't heard anything from the doctor yet…." Gilbertha sighed with frustration and a hint of sadness. She was talking on the phone with her mother, Rosina Walbrun one evening. Bert felt frustrated as her mother was going from English to German….so she did too and tried to explain in German so her mother could understand her better…." Uhhh….Nein…..Nein….Nein Mutter, ich habe noch nichts von dem Arzt in Kit Carson gehört……Yes, I go there…it's the only hospital for miles! Uhhh…..um….Krankenhaus…" Bert tried to remember the German word for hospital. "Yes, Mother the only one for miles….I just said that." Bert sighed. "…yes Mother, we want a baby! Ja!...Ja….Nein,…Paul and I haven't tried to prevent it, not back then, that is. ….. ich weiß es ist schon drei Jahre her seit Paul Jr ...." Bert spoke to her mother about the baby she lost. She knew it had been 2, nearly 3 years since then. Her mother thought it was time to try for another pregnancy, but the young couple had been taking their time with it. "What is wrong with Paul wanting me to wait?!" Bert raised her voice at her mother and started crying. She loved her mother to death, but their bold personalities clashed sometimes and they didn't always get along the greatest.
Paul was standing in the doorway. He had just come from working with the cattle. He went right over to his wife and placed a loving hand on her waist and motioned for her to give him the phone.
"Mother Walbrun…yeah it's Paul….listen….no you listen to me!" He raised his voice at his mother-in-law. She was a sweet lady but also very, very bold and would speak her mind often. "I CAN'T understand you…..I can't understand you when you speak in German! Bert can, but I cannot…..Now listen to me and you listen good!…..It's none of your business!….I want her to wait….yes….yes, so we know she's healthy enough….Don't you remember she almost died the last time?!...And how dare you yell at her like that….your own daughter!...OH you! Why don't you just…." Paul slammed down the phone as she had hung up on him. "shut it…." He muttered, trying not to curse….He was so ticked off at his mother-in-law. He usually got along well with her …but she was a bold woman, like Bert. She would give her opinion. Bert was a lot nicer about things though.
"It's OUR business what we do or what we don't do…." Paul looked at his wife and he had a stern look on his face. His heart and face and voice softened as he saw the love of his life with tears in her brown eyes and he placed his arms around her. His strong hand gently caressed her cheek and jawline, before he went in to kiss her. And finally, he placed a kiss upon her forehead. "It's alright…." He whispered, holding her. "….she needs to mind her own business and let us live our own lives….."
"Do you not want children after all?" she asked softly, gazing up at him. "Should we just….forget about it?" she swallowed back a few teardrops and shut her eyes. Bert was still tearing up and Paul gently held her and kissed her head and softly kissed her lips. "I do want a baby…..Sweetheart…I do…." Paul swallowed roughly and held her close and stroked her black hair. "I do…I just want to make sure…..you're healthy and….there will be no complications…."
"Birth isn't always picture perfect…." She told him.
"I know that…." Paul told her. "I've seen things with the cattle…..And last time with you. I don't want something to go wrong and I would lose both a baby and you. You especially….I DON'T want to lose you." He stressed.
"You wont…I'll make sure of it." Bert told him, tears glossing her eyes and she nodded her head.
"What if you get pregnant again and have another miscarriage?…." Paul stared at her. He couldn't understand how she wanted to go through so much pain and….gambling…with death. "Think about it…"
"Then we face whatever comes, Paul…" Bert whispered. She was stronger now. She could handle miscarriages, she had become so used to them. Deep down though, Bert prayed she wouldn't experience any more….but of course was prepared if they were to happen. She just wanted the chance to have a healthy baby…..even if it would be her last chance. Bert promised herself and Paul that she would be healthy and strong enough for a full term birth. She hoped and prayed her body would just cooperate! Just once…. Paul knew after a certain point, there was no going back….and so he decided to be there for her, no matter what happened. She was right, he thought. They would face whatever came….together.
They had gotten the call from the doctor in Kit Carson a few days later. "Yes Doctor….thank you for calling…" she said quietly and when the call had ended, she hung up the phone. Paul and the men had come in for their noon meal. Bert was getting the table ready at the last second and felt Paul come by her and plant a kiss on her cheek. She tried to smile at him but he noticed the tears welling up in her eyes. "I'm….not pregnant…..the doctor just called me…..I thought so, I didn't really feel any different….Just…..hearing a "No" is hard….."
"I know, Sweetheart…." Paul whispered, pulling her in an embrace. He was almost relieved at the news….yet also hurt. He also wanted what she wanted….He could also see how let down she was and seeing her hurt, hurt him too.
"Sorry to hear that, Mrs. B." One of the ranch hands told her. Another nodded his head. "Yeah, we know how much you two want a kid…."
"Thank you, Lester…..Roland." She nodded to both of them. They had been employed by the Bardrick's for some time now and had become like family. Bert sighed and sat down at the table with them. "I'll be fine…." She sighed, trying to smile and be in a better mood. "Perhaps it's just not the right time…." And so she accepted her life as it was at that time.
1937 was moving along as slow as 1936 did. Things were about the same….still difficult for many. Paul and Bert became too busy with the cattle and running the ranch to think about having children. Bert decided to let it rest anyway. Nothing was happening. She still wanted it though. Every time the Quinn boy would come over…..Every time she would go into town and would see children or a baby, she would smile….yet there would be a certain tugging at her heart. The desire never went away. That's what was so frustrating. The desire for it never went away and sometimes it was intense. Sometimes she felt blue and sad, because she didn't know if what she really wanted would ever happen. She tried her best to focus on other things…and soon became too busy living her life and helping Paul to worry about it.
Things were getting harder for Eddie and Helen. Eddie was discouraged. It seemed like he couldn't keep food on the table. Or good food, that is. They lived on lard or bacon grease sandwiches mainly. With ox tails and brains for their suppers….or what he could hunt or fish. Produce from the garden, what her parents would share with them….so they weren't going hungry. Still, the hard times were discouraging. He came in from work one chilly morning. "Mornin' Babe…." He let out a rough sigh. He gave her a peck on the lips and glanced at little Dale in his little high chair. He was grinning, kicking his chubby legs and pounding those chubby hands on the table top. Helen was feeding him his breakfast of scrambled eggs, and once and awhile, he would pick the food up himself and eat it and then grin at his Mama.
"Hey "Tiger"…." Eddie chuckled at his boy and smoothed his head of sandy blond waves. Helen had gotten the little boy's hair cut recently and saved the little locks of hair as a keepsake. Her chubby baby was now a chubby little toddler!
Eddie sighed and went to get his hunting gear without a word.
"I hope you get something, Eddie dear…." She called to him as he was leaving. Eddie let out a rough sigh and trudged to his in laws place to go hunting on the wooded hill.
Helen let out a sigh and looked at her son, grinning and chewing away.
"You sure like your eggies, don't you Dale?" Helen smiled at him. He gave her a cute nod. "Ba-con!" The little toddler exclaimed. He loved his bacon and scrambled eggs. And he knew that when he had his eggs, there would be bacon to go along with it. "Oh boy!" The little tyke exclaimed, just like Spanky on the Little Rascals. He even resembled Spanky in looks too! The little wavy haired boy longingly looked over at the cookstove and saw there was no bacon. He looked back at his Mama without a single word…..but his lower lip stuck out and one big crocodile tear ran down his cheek.
"Oh Dale….I'm so sorry, baby!…." Helen felt so sorry for her baby boy. So much so, that she cried. The tears were getting worse and she turned her face away from him and finally just went into her and her husband's bedroom, sat down on their bed and started to bawl. What were they going to do now?... They always saved the bacon and eggs for his little breakfast. Helen went without, when she could sneak it past her husband that is, just so her husband and son had enough food to eat. They had a little bit of oxtails left. She would cook those up with a brown gravy for their supper. And after this, there would be no bacon and no eggs for awhile. She was worried. She was stressed. She was scared. She didn't know what they were going to do if Eddie could not get anything from his hunting or fishing that night.
"Here I am….crying over bacon and eggs!…." Helen bawled. Later she let out a deep breath and dabbed her eyes, face and wet cheeks with a handchercheif. "You're such a fool, Helen." She told herself….but then chuckled a little and sniffled. "Ain't no fool like an old fool, as Mama would say." She thought of her mother's cute saying. Frances would say it, her eyes would have that twinkle in them and she would giggle!
Helen came back into the little kitchen and saw her little boy. He grinned at her, though tears stained his cheeks. He was okay. "Mama!" he said cutely, and she couldn't help but smile and tears ran down her cheeks….."I love you, baby…." She cried and kissed his little head. He brought his little arms out and hugged her neck and gave her a wet smooch on her cheek. "I wubv yoo!" he told her. The toddler stuck his lips out for another kiss and Helen nearly lost it in tears. She was so touched because it was the first time he said, "I love you."
"I love you too, honey…" she sniffled, smiling and she gave him a kiss. She felt tears run down her cheeks as she softly stroked his sandy blond head of hair. "Let's finish your eggies!"
She gave him the last couple of little bites. He loved his food and always cleaned his little plate! "All gone!" the toddler exclaimed.
"You're such a sweet boy…" Helen cried and wiped the tears from her eyes.
These days and times of the Great Depression affected the Lay's too. They were surviving. They had their garden. Fred still had his job at the Dubuque Star Brewing Company. Fred had had his responsible position for the Brewery since the year 1910. He worked at a brewery in Germany when he lived there and also the Emeling Brewery in Johnston, Pennsylvania when he lived there. He knew very well how to make good beer! So when he wasn't laid off, they weren't hurting as far as his job was concerned. They lived modestly, well below their means and would share and give to their daughter Helen, son-in-law Eddie and their precious grandson Dale. They would also give to their son Freddie to help him with his growing family. The hard times brought on a small joyful occasion when William Frederick Lay joined the Fred Lay Jr. family on July 9th, 1937. Fred and Frances Lay were blessed with another grandchild and their second grandson. They couldn't have been happier or prouder.
Frances was there at her son's place, helping them after the birth…along with Irene's mother, Mrs. Duggan.
"I'm so glad to be home….." Irene exclaimed softly. She was exhausted, but they were finally home from the hospital a few days after the birth, with baby William in tow. She rested on the little couch, holding her baby and glanced up at her mother. "Mother, will you go wake up Marlene for me? I want to see her. See how she is with meeting her baby brother…." Irene smiled at her chubby newborn baby boy.
"Certainly dear….but not for too long. You need to rest."
"Yes Mother….I just want both my babies together with me right now. I'll sleep for awhile after, I promise."
"Yes…you just leave all the work up to us, honey." Frances smiled at her daughter in law. "Irene,….He is so precious."
"He is…." Irene smiled down at her baby. She was so happy and relieved this time that the birth went well and the baby was strong and perfectly healthy. No complications and no heart issues.
"Mama,….We're going to call him Billy." Fred Jr. grinned from ear to ear. He was so proud. He had a son now!
"That's a cute nickname, Freddie….." Frances smiled and her eyes twinkled with joy. It was a lovely sight to see her proud son with his wife and their newest addition. "Yes, I think he looks like a Billy." She chuckled.
"Look at those chubby feet!" Freddie exclaimed quietly with a grin. "Cute, chubby little hands, legs and feet….Gosh, Irene!…." Freddie grinned at his wife. He couldn't wipe the smile off of his face if he tried. He was so proud.
"He's a little roly-poly." Irene chuckled. She saw as little 4 year old Marlene came up by them and her daddy held her on his lap so she could see her new little brother.
"Marlene….this is your little brother, William Frederick…..we're going to call baby brother "Billy", ok?" Freddie grinned at his daughter as she had a sweet smile on her face.
"Do you want to say "Hi Billy."?" Freddie whispered. "…tell baby brother you love him?"
Marlene smiled and gave her new baby brother a kiss.
"Aw, that's so sweet, Marlene!...You gonna be a good big sister and help Mommy with the baby?" Fred Jr. asked his daughter. "Huh?" He crooned softly.
"I take care of him all by myself…." Marlene told them. "MY Billy." She said matter of factly, as only a little girl could. She, in her little heart though, was very determined that that was HER baby.
Freddie chuckled. "Let Mommy "help" you, alright?" Fred Jr. sweetly glanced over at his wife. He set little Marlene down on the floor beside them and leaned over to kiss his wife Irene. "Got my wonderful wife….daughter….and now my son. I think I'll be set…for awhile." He grinned and winked at her. "I think I want one more girl and one more boy."
"Dear,….I love you an awful lot…but I'm not letting you near me again for another few years…." She teased him.
"Fair enough…" Freddie chuckled and looked at Irene with intense love. He gave his wife a kiss on the forehead. "Sounds like you did wonderful, honey…..Gee, I wish I could've been in the room with you…..I'll never forget when they brought Billy up to the nursery window and I finally saw him….They showed him to me and told me "It's a boy."….I think I cried. Wanted to hold him right away…."
"You're so sweet, dear…" Irene whispered to him. "But oh dear…..you would not have wanted to be in there with me…I don't think you would've wanted to see or hear me like that!"
"Bert…tie her tail to her neck for me, please…" Paul asked, handing her over some twine. He had scrubbed up his hands and arms and was cleansing the perineal area before making the calf delivery. So she tied the female cow's tail to her neck. To keep it out of their way.
"Water to rinse…." He asked. Bert gave it to him. She was helping with small things, whatever he needed her to do for him…. And she was leaving the really tough stuff to him. The calf she had birthed previously came out so smoothly…but this one was having trouble. The ranch hands were gone. It was late at night, and so it was just the two of them. They were working together on it.
"Do you need the pulling chain?" she asked, bringing the huge bucket of disinfectant with the large metal chain sitting in it.
"I might…." Paul replied, his whole arm, nearly up to his shoulder was stuck up the heifer, checking the calf's position. "That's not too heavy for you?" He glanced at her.
"No honey…I've got it." She answered, bringing the bucket over. It was quite heavy, but she was pretty strong and somehow managed to carry it over to her husband. "How is it going? All set to deliver?"
"Nah….I don't think so just yet." Paul replied, wiping the dripping sweat from his face with his sleeve. She took a cloth and mopped it up for him. "I'm so proud of you, dear…" Bert smiled at him.
Paul grinned at her and his look softened as she mopped the sweat from his brow and face. It was just pouring from him, he was so focused on the task at hand. "I dreamed I'd be doing that for you someday. Funny, huh?"
"That's very sweet, honey…." Bert smiled. "Hopefully not in this barn!" She laughed and lovingly grabbed his arm. They both chuckled a little and Bert gazed up at him sweetly.
"Only if I've got you and a calf to deliver at the same time…." He teased. "Nah…No way. I'm joking dear."
"I wish you could be with me honey…if it ever does happen to us…Full term, I mean." She said softly.
Paul was solemn. He nodded and put his focus on the Mama and her calf. "There's some hooves finally…" Paul exclaimed. "I think I'll need that pulling chain, Sweet…."
"She's trying!" Bert exclaimed." She's trying to push…Oh, she's trying…Look at her!…..I know, Belle….Oh, I know…" Bert petted the cow. "I know….That's it girl. I know you can do it…." Bert tried to be of comfort to the animal. Belle was a heifer around a year old. Never gave birth before. She was one of the offspring of one of their four female cows. "She's doing good, isn't she Paul….She's trying her best to push on her own…"
"Yeah….might still need the chain though….Yup…." He told her, checking things awhile later. "Shoulders might be a bit too big. " he got the pulling chain and put it on the calf's legs that were sticking out. "Yup…she's a big one!" He pulled, but it wouldn't budge much. "Damn…it….C'mon….Come….On…." He gritted his teeth and pulled slowly on the chain several times. "She's stuck…..Damn, she's stuck…." He stopped a moment to catch his breath.
"What do you need me to do?" Bert asked him quickly.
"Hold onto my belt….We'll pull 'er out together….Well we'll try…."
"I know, Belle…. You're uncomfortable, girl…." Paul said. He was hearing the noises of discomfort and pain from the animal. "I know….These shoulders are just too damn large…Come on, Sweet….I need help here…." Paul breathed roughly, but he was pretty calm...Bert, however, was getting just a bit scared. This was the worst she had ever seen of a calf birth. Paul pulled with all his might, but the calf only moved a little bit.
"Gilbertha…..I need help here!" He was intently focused on the animal. "Hold onto my belt. My waist…..something." He breathed roughly. He was giving it his all. He needed her help though. He knew with their strength combined they would surely be able to get the calf out.
"Bert….I need you!…..The Mother and calf might both die….Come on Bert!" His voice was a bit stern with his wife. He was so intent on the cow and getting her calf out safely. He glanced at his wife a split second. He saw the look on her face and felt concern for her….."Bert….Sweetheart….I need your help right now. I know you can do it, honey…..Please….I need help…."
Somehow Gilbertha snapped into attention, braced herself, grabbed him around the waist, at times she anchored them both and held him by his belt….. and they pulled together. "1….2…3….now…..Again!" Paul breathed. "Damn these shoulders!...Now!" She pulled with him and Paul pulled with the chain. He reached up and grabbed at the calf's shoulder, man handling it, and pulled it outward "Come on" Paul breathed through clenched teeth as he pulled with the pulling chain. "Come…On…Girl….C'mon!….1….2…3..…". He got a better grip on the pulling chain and the calf and yanked and pulled slowly. "1…2…3…4…..5…" Paul kept counting as they pulled the calf out. Paul, with the pulling chain in hand and with Bert still helping him. Soon after, the calf shot out quickly, almost like cannon fire. The calf fell to the ground on its side and Bert was scared that she thought she heard a large cracking sound.
"Paul….honey! Its neck! Oh dear, its neck!,...is it okay?!...the poor darling! Is it alright?"
"Calm down, Bert…..Just help me….I'll check it later…." He said. Paul was panting hard, out of breath and rubbing the calf vigorously.
"She's not breathing….." There were tears in Bert's eyes. She had always seen the little calf get up and the mother would always come to tend to it. This time was different. "Go tend to Belle….." He breathed. "Keep her away for a bit…." Paul said and he worked on the calf, rubbing it's furry, slimy body. He cleared the mouth and nostrils with his fingers as quick as he could. Then he took a piece of straw and tickled its nostril….he waited for the animal's coughing and taking it's first few breaths….Nothing. Paul knew he had to work fast or he knew the calf would soon die if it could not breathe. Paul breathed lightly into the calf's nose and waited for it to let out then he tried it again and softly blew into the calf's one nostril. He waited a few minutes. He tried it again….and again…"There we go, girlie…" he breathed in relief as he saw the little calf's chest start to rise and fall on its own. "There we go…" She was alive. "She's alive, Bert…." He breathed with relief. Paul again inspected the little calf, still laying on the ground. "Neck might broken a bit but she's okay….I'll have to call a vet to check it…. Set her neck back to how it should be, if so….I don't want to risk paralysis….or worse. I'd do it myself if I knew how…..Poor girl…"
"….How is Belle?" Paul looked up at his wife. And soon joined her side to help her inspect the new Mama cow. Belle was fine, much to their surprise.
"She's going to be ok…." Paul let out a breath. "That was sure something, huh, Belle?" He patted the cow and whispered to her. "I'm sorry I had to reach in like that, girl. Can't get over those shoulders!" he gave the Mama cow a pat and went to the new calf. Bert joined his side.
"What should we name her? Minnie is cute, I think…." Paul glanced at the calf, with his hands on his hips. He then glanced at his wife. "Nettie?...Netta?….what do you think, Bert? You're better at this part than me." Paul smiled at her.
"Minnetta…." Bert smiled at the little brown calf. "Isn't that a pretty name for a cow?" she grinned at him. Paul smiled and nodded. He thought it was a nice name.
Paul wrapped her up in his strong arms in a close hug. They were both sweaty, their clothes were dirty, gross and bloody from the calving. It was cool and dark in the early hours of the Autumn morning and they were both exhausted. "Thank you so much for all your help….I couldn't have done that by myself…." He was still breathing hard as he held her and kissed her forehead. He had given it his all. She helped him, though she was shocked and scared a bit. He was so proud of her for that.
"Paul…you did all the work…"
"You did your part. You helped me save Mama and calf….Bert, I thought I was gonna lose both of 'em…." He looked over at the little calf….set with her new name, Minnetta. "We'll start bottle feeding her tomorrow. Bottle feeders tend to sleep at night and eat during the day….I'll call the vet tomorrow too to check her neck…" Bert helped her husband scoop up hay around the little calf to keep her warm. It was cool for mid October. With Mama cow in her own pen, they made their way back to the ranch house. "Our cows keep having more girls, we'll have to start a dairy farm soon, Honey!"
"I like raising both Beef and Dairy. Makes it interesting." Bert smiled. They changed out of those dirty clothes and wearily climbed into bed to sleep awhile before it was time to get up again. They talked a bit before going to sleep, as they often did. "You did so well, Paul….You know so much about birth. I'm so proud of you….." She whispered and found his bare upper body in their own bed.
"I know about cattle birth…." Paul said. "It's like human birth…but then it's not….it's different. Still…birth is birth…."
"It's amazing….You're so amazing, Paul. " she whispered and kissed him, long and lovingly.
"I gotta read up more on human birth…." He said solemnly. "Sounds funny to say it like that…."
He knew some similarities but he knew he really wanted to know every little thing Bert might experience with a full pregnancy and a full term labor and delivery. "I need to know more…..I'm so scared ….seeing you in something like that situation…..I almost lost you with Jr. I don't want something like that to happen again….or something worse." He whispered. Bert thought she heard him crying a little bit, and so she snuggled closer to him.
"No reason to worry over it now, honey….I'm not pregnant…." She whispered and sighed and kept quiet for some time till he spoke again.
"You want to be…" he said softly, and his face turned towards hers in the cool night. "I want that for us too…I want to help give you what you want….I….just want things to go better next time…and you know me well, Bert. I'm future oriented. I think of the future and I want to be prepared for it…."
"…You can't expect everything to go perfect, Paul…." Bert said quietly. She turned over and felt his arms around her. She settled her chin on his chest, looking up at him. Her lips pursed and she gingerly kissed his chest. She sighed softly, rubbing her cheek against his skin. "Whatever happens….we'll face it head on. Together." She lovingly whispered.
" Good or bad…..We have each other…..No matter what happens…" Paul whispered. He tried to believe the words he said.
"I love you…." Bert smiled her Mona Lisa smile and gazed at his face in the darkness. "I'm sorry I got a bit stunned. Frightened…..it won't happen again, honey." She told him. Bert kissed his chest and felt her body close to his. "I've just never seen it that bad before…."
"Does birth scare you?" He whispered, staring up at the ceiling. Paul's hand found hers.
"Yes and no…" she admitted. "I'll find that book we bought…..We never read it all. Didn't get very far….."
"I pray we will someday." Paul said. "I want to know all I can about it."
Bert rolled over so that she was laying on top of him and softly cuddled him. "Are you saying that…after all we've gone through….That you want children?…...If you really don't….tell me….and I'll drop the subject right here….." She softly ran her slender fingers through his short dark hair. Bert felt him kiss her lips softly and she found herself deepening the kiss. "Please tell me, Paul…" she whispered. "Yes or no….please." She felt tears slip down her cheeks. "Don't just say you want this because I want it….."
"I don't want something bad to happen to you…..but I know I can't control it…You want a baby. I want a baby. I truly do….but I'm afraid. Sometimes you just need to take a risk….and trust God through it. ….If you're sure you're really ready and healthy enough…Bert?"
"Yes…." She whispered, with tears in her eyes.
"Then yes…." He whispered. Paul felt tears come to his eyes too and he kissed her. Bert felt his strong arms around her, and he buried his face in her shoulder…... "I'm scared for you…..and I feel like I don't know enough….but we'll get through it together. Just like we have everything so far that's meant to knock us down and out…." He felt himself crying but he took several deep breaths and he kept it together. "I just…love you…so much." He didn't care that she saw or heard him crying. She had seen him in his most vulnerable state, as he had seen her…. " I want to do whatever I can to be there for you through it all."
Now, it was late October and soon November was approaching. Paul and Bert would celebrate another anniversary of marriage on November 3rd, 1937. Anyway, it had been a week or so since she had been to the doctor again and so the telephone call from the doctor came in once again. Bert dreaded the same outcome. That she would not be pregnant. Deep down, she hoped this time would be different. The doctor had asked her to come for just one more exam to confirm what Bert had been wondering. She had been feeling different recently and had missed "that time of the month" so the knew something was going on. Paul was busy with the ranch hands out in the pasture one morning….so Bert snuck out and took Paul's car and drove herself to the hospital in Kit Carson.
She filled out her medical information, and was soon called back into the exam room.
"Well Mrs. Bardrick….lets just see if our tests were accurate. We did the test last week you know, and...the rabbit died….as they all do….but we checked and everything came out as it should have….but we'll do one last exam of you just to triple check things."
"You'll be excited to tell your husband, I'm sure…." Her new doctor smiled at her as she lay back on the exam table, and the exam had been done.
"That means I'm?..." Bert gasped with tears in her eyes. She sat up a little, just staring at the doctor.
The doctor nodded and smiled. "You're expecting….Congratulations Mrs. Bardrick…."
"Everything's all right then?!.…." Her heart beat in her chest and she felt she could cry and she tried to calm herself. She was happy but nervous at the news and she wondered at how her husband would take it. She feared the worst would happen with the pregnancy but she tried her best to put those thoughts out of her mind. She wanted it to turn out different this time.
"Everything seems to be good. Just keep me updated. Take it easy for awhile."
"As fatigued and run down as I feel, I will doctor…." Bert nodded, smiling. "How soon should I tell my husband? Today's our anniversary….I thought that it would be beautiful to tell him then." Bert smiled and kept wiping tears away from her eyes. "Sorry….I'm getting emotional." She smiled and cried a few more tears, wiping them away. "….Oh my….goodness…." She cried and couldn't wipe the smile off her face.
"A beautiful idea….and what a gift to give him." The doctor told her and put his hand on her shoulder. "Take good care of yourself and keep me updated. I wish you the best."
"Thank you doctor." She smiled and shook his hand. He left her soon after so that she could dress out of her hospital gown and into her clothing. She zipped up her tan skirt and put on her plain brown top and tan women's suit jacket. Bert decided to leave it unbuttoned, she thought it looked pretty like that. She put on her three strapped high heels. Bert loved those brown shoes. She thought they were classy and interesting with the three straps and a button on each.
She paid for the visit and drove for their home in First View, Colorado. And so she made it back to the ranch. Paul met her in the driveway as she pulled up in his car. Bert sat there a moment, her hand on her stomach and a tear ran down her cheek, with a smile still etched on her face." It feels like the first time all over again…" she had been thinking. She had been so happy when she had first learned she was pregnant and had told Paul the news. That pregnancy had ended in miscarriage though….and so had the ones following that one. She hoped and prayed this one would not end the same. Bert took a deep breath and got out of the car and she soon found herself in her husband's arms and she daringly went in for a kiss and then looked at him with an electrifying smile that lit up her face.
"You seem extra joyful today, Sweet….I wonder what day it is?" He chuckled. "I'm sorry I don't have any gift for you…."
"That's alright honey!" Bert smiled from ear to ear and kissed him. "I don't even care…." She said breathlessly. She felt Paul wrap his strong arms around her tall, slim frame and she accepted his lips with hers. She deepened the kiss and lingered in his arms a moment.
"I thought we could spend most of the day in bed…huh? That make up for it?" He teased.
"I would love that…." She grinned. Bert wrapped her arms around his neck and moved her face closer to his, looking at him with daring brown eyes. "You couldn't top my present anyway…." She whispered, shaking her head while smiling at him. She stood there a few minutes, just holding him.
"You have a present for me?….So that's why you took my car!" he chuckled and gave her a peck on the lips. "What do you have to say for yourself, ma'am?" Paul chuckled as she laughed at him. He put his arm around her and they walked into their little ranch house. They made it right to their bedroom. She laid down on their bed, after taking off her suit jacket. Paul grinned as he saw she was laying in such a way so he saw every attractive curve of her body. Even though fully clothed, she looked amazing and sensuous to him.
"Mind if I…help you with that?" Paul grinned, and unzipped the little side zipper of her skirt. She took off her top and soon was laying there in only her undergarments.
"Still like what you see after 5 years, Mr. Bardrick?" she grinned, raising an eyebrow. Bert gave him that familiar "Come Hither" look and soon she felt his body against hers. His lips with hers. Bert softly rubbed his back and was kissing her husband as they rolled over and she later felt her 1930s black silk and lace brassiere come off.
"Is this really what you thought of for our Anniversary?" she whispered and her face broke out in another smile. She was undoing the buttons on his shirt as he took off his pants.
"What better for an anniversary present?" He seductively whispered. He then chuckled and kissed her. "Now where's my present?"
"Don't you want to know why I took your car?" she asked saucily, yet undid her black girdle.
"What car?" He crooned, and that made her laugh. She kissed him and felt his skin upon hers. Bert soon lost herself in his kiss and she lay there next to him, face to face. She softly grabbed Paul's face and kissed him again. "I took your car to run a little errand….." She whispered.
"Something wrong with yours I need to fix?"
"No…..I just felt like taking your car….." She giggled.
"Ok, that's fine…." Paul kissed her and took her in his arms again. "C'mon Sweetness, you're driving this guy batty, huh!" He kissed her again, lightly pinning her to their bed…. but she broke their kisses and let out a breath.
"I went to the hospital in Kit Carson…." She told him quickly and her heart leaped in her chest. She was breathless. Bert wasn't thinking and just blurted it out. She wasn't even aware of what she had just said, so she blushed.
Paul kissed her and sat up. "Hospital?" He asked her.
Bert nodded.
"Are you alright, honey?"
She nodded, smiling at him and wrapped her arms around his bare back and lovingly kissed him again. "Yes…." Bert whispered and smoothed his head of brown hair and the scruff of his face, she touched his lips before she leaned in and kissed them again. "I can't give you my present until…..9 months from now….hopefully. If it all goes well."
"You're? ….You're?!" He stammered, with tears in his eyes, he didn't even get to finish because he kissed her again and rolled the both of them over and continued kissing her. "Oh Honey…." Paul mumbled and his lips found hers again, his cheek rubbing against hers in between kisses, and his hands found her back and her black hair and Paul ran his hand softly down the back of her neck down to the length of her back….Paul hugged her and held her, while he felt tears in his eyes. Bert was smiling and crying too.
"Are you alright?….You feel okay?" Paul asked her, nearly in tears of joy and he caressed her cheek and jawline and smoothed his hand downwards till he placed it softly over her bare stomach.
Bert nodded and smiled that Mona Lisa smile. "Happy Anniversary…" she whispered. Bert kissed him again and both of them were crying. Though it was happy tears, they both had a mix of fear and nervousness about the situation. Was it the right time now? Was everything going to be okay this time? Bert wondered if her husband was even happy about the news.
"Are you happy?!" Bert asked and felt the tears well up and she couldn't help but smile. "Please be happy…" she cried and looked at him, waiting for his response. She studied his face, and she didn't know how to take it. "I am…." She whispered almost sheepishly, with tears in her eyes. Quite unlike her usually bold, extroverted personality.
"I'm scared…." Paul said seriously. Yet, he was pleased about the news, like each time she had told him.
"I am too!…." Bert couldn't hold the tears back anymore. They spilled over like a waterfall. Paul brought her into his arms again and kissed her, caressing every curve of her body.
"I feel happy...but nervous…and scared! I'm so excited….but I'm so scared!" She unleashed it all, there in his strong arms. Every emotion….every single tear.
"Whatever happens, happens….We'll get through it together…we won't stop trying until we have a baby…..only if you want…." Paul told her. "It's up to you, Sweetheart….As long as you're healthy enough and able."
"Happy Anniversary…." She whispered with tears in her eyes and a smile on her face. Her arms enveloped him in a hug.
"Happy Anniversary, Sweetheart…I love you so much!…." Paul cried and kissed her several times.
Author's Notes:
The scene with my Grandpa Dale finding out there was no bacon to go with his eggs one morning, him not saying anything but a big teardrop rolling down his cheek was true. His mother Helen felt so sorry for him that she cried.
William Frederick Lay joined the Fred Lay Jr. family on July 9th, 1937. I was thinking about his name and noticed Freddie (Fred Jr.) and Irene named all their children's middle names after those in his immediate family. Marlene FRANCES (after Fred Jr's mother) William FREDERICK (after Fred Jr. himself and Fred Sr., his father.) And Vivian HELEN (after Fred Jr 's sister)…the only child of theirs they did not name was the baby girl they lost in 1934. I tend to wonder what her name would have been.
November 3rd, 1937 was Paul and Bert's actual wedding date. Hopefully, I made a nice "tribute" to that here in this chapter.
Bert's outfit I described in this chapter was an actual outfit of hers in a photograph I have seen of her with her youngest sibling, John Christ Walbrun. Those three strap heels of hers looked so interesting and classy! Of course, I don't know the actual colors….but it was a light colored, unbuttoned suit jacket, dark top, light colored skirt and the dark heels with the three straps on them. She was either wearing a large flat gold necklace or a pearl necklace. It is hard to tell which in the picture.
My great great grandma Frances had this saying, "Ain't no fool like an old fool." My mom said to her once when she was a girl, "Ain't no fool like an old fool, huh Boop Boo?" and Boop Boo as they called her, thought it was so cute!
