A Twinsane Wedding
Chapter 1 First Therapy Session
The voyage back to N. Sanity Island was, a bit of a quiet one. With neither of the two doing anything or mouthing even one word. Just the sound of the waves and the boat rocking against them.
What was surprising to both of them is that neither one had tried to kill the other on the ride over.
When they finally docked, Crash and Cortex hopped off and headed through the forest. Hoping that they wouldn't get caught and captured by Papu Papu and the local residents when they finally reached their destination.
Cortex stopped after a few steps. "You know Crash, why don't you take the lead? I don't want to have remember what happened here before. Alright?" Crash couldn't beleive his ears, his creator was giving him a chance at something?
The bandicoot nodded yes and they continued walking, but just when they thought it would be a walk in the park, Cortex stepped on a twig, breaking it in two with a loud snap. 'Oh now I've gone and done it.' A local turned his head and shouted something in a foreign language. "Oh boy. Hide." The scientist grabbed Crash and pulled him down.
The natives caught a glimpse of a white lab coat just as Cortex and Crash ducked behind a bush. Curious, two men walked over and raised their spears. They jabbed their weapons straight into the shrub and right into Cortex's side. "Oh..." He struggled to hold back his scream, but it was to no avail. "Ahhhhh!" Both of them jumped out from hiding and started to run. The tribesfolk signaled Papu Papu and they headed after the duo. Crash looked back at them, eyes wide. "Don't look back, just keep running! I don't wanna be tied to a totem pole again!" Once was enough for poor Cortex. "Why do they hold a grudge against me?!" He cried. "What did I ever do?!"
Crash and Cortex were running for what felt like forever, until a switch clicked inside Crash's semi empty head when they entered the village. He scurried up a tree and lept to a vine. Dr. Cortex jumped up to grab it as Crash swung forward, but his hands missed and he ended up slamming face first into the trunk of the tree. As his eyes were still spinning, Crash grabbed him and hoisted him up, before swinging them up and over the railing of one of the larger straw huts. It was about the size of the Academy of Evil.
Papu Papu and the others shook their heads and retreated. As soon as they were safe, Cortex fell backward onto the floor and tried to catch his breath. "Why... did I have... you t-take the lead? Haven't you...already...h-h-hurt me enough?" The man wheezed. "Forget it, let's just find the therapist." After a minute of lying down, he stood up and noticed the bandicoot focused on a sign in front of them. It said read "The Therapist Is In" Tilting his head, Crash knocked on the door. "Looks like we found it. Yay." Cortex's voice was lined with sarcasm.
The door opened and there stood a man who looked like the other natives, except for being fully clothed: he donned a checkered shirt and dress pants underneath a lab coat. He spoke in perfect English, "Ah, hello there. I'm Dr. Jacobson. I take it you two are Crash Bandicoot and Dr. Neo Cortex?" The duo nodded. Dr. Jacobson smiled and gestured for them to come in. "Nice to meet you. Right this way." He shut the door behind them.
"Ok, Crash, Cortex, first off, I'm amazed that you two are here, because usually some rivals that I've helped always have a tendency to procrastinate and then not show up at all. Well done, glad you're here." He looked at his notebook/calendar. "You guys are my 4:00 appoinment, and my only appointment for the day. Lucky me. That and you guys are fifteen minutes early."
Dr. Cortex rolled his eyes as he followed the brainless bandicoot and Dr. Jacobson twords his office. He couldn't beleive that he had been forced to do this.
'Nina and Coco are going to be in so much trouble when I'm through with them.' He thought. 'Can't beleive that they suggested me and Crash start therapy sessions focused on our "issues". I don't need this, I need to destroy Crash and rule over the islands with an iron fist! Is that too much to ask!' As they trekked down the long corridor, Cortex thought about what kind of punishment he could give his niece.
Cortex was pulled back to reality when they stepped inside the therapists office. Various framed diplomas and certificates of authentication decorated the walls. A large bookself held multiple types of books ranging from countless categories which included, 'Mending A Broken Relationship' and 'Building Up Your Self Esteem' to 'Is It Hate, Love, or Something Much Deeper?' The doctor took one glance at that title, turned away and shuddered.
A cold chill ran through his veins. Was that because the A/C was turned on? Or was it something else? Crash looked at him curiously. Cortex wiped the nervous look off his face and glared at him with a scowl.
"Have a seat gentlemen. Cortex, your niece informed me about you and Crash here."
"Oh, she did, did she?" Cortex asked through gritted teeth. Taking a seat, he shook his head.
"Yes, she was here about a week ago and gave me the whole rundown on you two." Dr. Jacobson looked at Crash who was reaching for the bowl of Wumpa Fruit on the table. He stopped himself when the therapist noticed him. Crash frowned and pulled his hand back. "No, no please, help yourself, just picked those fresh this morning. So please, enjoy." Crash smiled his toothy grin and plucked the two biggest ones up.
"He's a fruit addict. This is literally the only thing he eats." Cortex said. The bandicoot held out his arm and offered the scientist one, who swatted it right out of his hand, it rolled away under the table. "No, Crash, I don't want one. I just want out of here!"
Dr. Jacobson raised an eyebrow and refocused his eyes on the marsupial, who shrugged and bit into the juicy fruit. "Now, now, no need to snap, I can sense there's one heck of a rivalry between you two. Coco said you two needed help, and judging by what I just saw, she was totally on point. Both her and Nina were right, and they came here together. I sense there's something between them as well but they said I should focus on you guys for now." Crossing his legs, he clicked his pen, he was ready to start writing. "So tell me, when did this rivalry start? Go back to the begining."
Cortex and Crash laid back on the sofa and Cortex explained everything, "Well, I created Crash Bandicoot myself years ago, he was meant to be the general of my army, only downside was that I failed to turn him evil. My own failed creation. He's just a mindless marsupial, an idiot to put it simply, and I've never been able to rule over the islands because of it. He foils my plans and beats me every time. I don't understand!"
The therapist looked at him wide eyed, clearly interested in knowing more, "really? If you say he's an idiot, then how come you've never been able to beat him?"
Cortex froze. He turned to Crash who crossed his eyes and stuck out his tounge. "I...well, I never thought of it like that." Jacobson scribbled things down on the paper. "Crash, I never considered that before. You might be smarter than you look. Oh what am I saying?" Cortex couldn't beleive that he had just heard those words come out of his own mouth.
"And you can't stand him, is that correct?"
"As far as you know doctor. We had been forced to work together to stop the Evil Twins, who were my pet parrots from my childhood from destroying N. Sanity Island. We did suceed, but along the way he used me as a hammer to beat up enemies, threw me across gaps to pull switches, and even used me as a board on both snow and rock to help us get down a hill, and he kicked me over the railing twice and believe me when I say that was not at all fun. First time, I didn't even see it coming."
"Wow, so you suffered a great amount of abuse from Crash. And here I thought he was sweet."
"Sweet is definitely not the word I'm thinking of. Can we be done now?" Cortex asked as he and Crash sat up.
Even though he wanted to interject and stretch this session a little further, Dr. Jacobson honored his wish. "Ok, we can be done, but I do ask that you two return next week for another session so we can pick up where we left off. Same time as today. Alright? Think you guys can do that?" Crash gave a thumbs up. "Cortex?"
As much as he wanted to march straight out of the office, slam the door behind him and never come back, Dr. Cortex complied and said yes. "Yes, alright. You win, we'll be back." Cortex and Crash started tword the door. Halfway there, he turned back to Jacobson and asked. "Um, just how many sessions are there going to be?"
"As many as it takes to get you two to stop fighting. I'll tell you about the next session when it gets here. See you next week." Cortex sighed as he and Crash climbed down the ladder, he really didn't want to come back. Sadly he didn't think he had a choice in the matter.
"Well, that was something wasn't it?" Crash nodded yes. He reached his arms out to hug his creator but Cortex slapped his hands away. "Don't...you...dare." A spear whistled through the air and came within inches of piercing the man right through the neck. It wedged itself into the tree trunk. "Ahhhhh!" Jumping into Crash's arms, Cortex whimpered and shook with fright. "On second thought, I'lI make an exception. Now let's get out of here! I hate this place!"
The bandicoot sprinted back twords the jungle, past Farmer Ernest and back to the boat. Crash lept on and they set off back to Iceberg Lab. Cortex's teeth were chattering as he wrapped his arms tighter around Crash, clearly he was still shaken. "T-t-thank you f-for almost getting me killed! You really are the worst creature I-I have ever m-mutated!" Crash started to set Cortex down but was stopped midway. "No, no, you don't have to set me down just yet. Wait till we get back."
Crash was surprised but in a good way. His nemesis who had been trying to do away with him now wanting to be comforted. The bandicoot happily tightened his embrace on the scientist as the boat swayed back and forth.
'Why did I just ask him to comfort me? Do I really think of him as an idiot?' Cortex reached for his ray gun in his back pocket as he thought about that.
A/N
Suspense is fun! And I'm sensing conflicted feelings. What's to come in the next chapter? You'll find out soon enough. Now onto the authors note. Woo! Chapter 1 done! Yeah I'm on a roll!
Way to go, you're back on the writing train.
Hey Dr. Cortex. My old co host from my Requiem Story.
Oh yeah, the very story *cough* that you need to continue or revise one of these days. *cough*
I know, I know. Don't rush me. I'll eventually get around to it. But for now I really wanna get this story done.
About the story, just where is this little tale going to go?
You read the title and summary didn't you?
Yes, I...wait...*reads summary again* oh god!
I'm sorry. *covers mouth to keep from laughing* Ok that wraps up this up. So until next time...
Wait! Wait!
Keep smiling!
