It was about eight in the morning on the day of the exam. We stared at a restaurant the navigator told us to go to.
This was the site of the Hunter Exam? A restaurant? Does the test consist of a fucking food eating competition?
I glared at the building, annoyed. My fists rubbed against my eyes in a vain attempt to rub away the sleepness I felt. I was tired, far more exhausted than I should from simply waking up early. This fatigue was starting to get annoying.
All I could hope was that, once all the moment that no doubt was to place during the exam happened, I'd wake up.
"You'd think it'd be a stadium or something... You really think this is it?" I said grumpily as I waved a hand at the building in front of me.
My puffball friend shrugged.
"Not like we have any other clues to go off of. Besides, the guy wasn't lying; we both could tell that. And he had no reason to lie to us. So we might as well trust his word."
I grumbled, "Eh. Fine..."
We walked through the sliding door and entered the old, Japanese restaurant. There was a bar in front of a small, open kitchen with a chef cooking food. There were wooden tables to our left, which were empty since it was early in the morning. There were some customers at the bar, waiting for a middle-aged man to finish cooking their meal. Two waiters were standing off to the side, chatting to themselves. Not in any rush to service us or anything...
I looked to Killua, who nodded his head at the chef, "I think that's the guy we're supposed to talk to."
The chef turned his head to us and gave us a nod, "Mornin'. Take a seat and someone will be with you shortly."
"Is the backroom available?" I said word for word from the paper we received from the navigator. I had memorized it at Killua's insistence, then I ate the stupid thing at his insistence as well...
The chef furrowed his eyes and took me seriously. Way more serious than simply ordering a meal.
"What are you having?" the chef said simply, but low.
The Hunter Exam, dude, what else?
I sighed and continued, "The steak combo, please. The one that'll," I sighed, again, "make us see the light. Make it three."
I just wanted to get this over with. I'm tired. I already ate a piece of paper. I hate cloak and dagger bullshit.
The chef's eyes narrowed at me. His face became all business...
This fucker was taking this way too seriously.
"Combo for three, eh? How do you want 'em cooked?"
"Grilled slowly over a low flame until done, please," I said as monotone and as annoyed as I could muster.
The chef looked at me flatly before frowning.
"You're ruining all my fun, ya' know that?"
My mouth twisted in indifference as I stared at the chef, supremely annoyed.
"Man, I fought a train full of people to get here. Give me a break," I said, rubbing the spot on my chest where the cowboy's bullet hit me. I had a welt the size of an orange and a bruise as wide as my hand. The left side of my body was black and blue where I hit that metal pole subway pole. Fuck his fun. I'm too tired and grumpy for this shit.
"So, you're the guys Spaulo spoke about. I thought there were four of you," the chef said with an eyebrow raised.
I shrugged. This wasn't the wizard of Oz. We don't all become friends and skip down the yellow brick road to the Hunter Exam, fool. They left us the moment they got the info for the navigator from Spaulo. I'm pretty sure Bokuden quit, probably trying next year. We had no idea about the sniper woman, but we both agreed she'd probably need more training to be a Hunter. If she does come to the Exam she... wouldn't do well. A gun isn't enough of an equalizer to people on my level and above. I could think of a few ways to counter a rifle, and I'm only just getting used to my superhuman body. Killua wouldn't even break a sweat.
But, to be fair, I think me and Killua do not constitute normal Hunter applicants. By any metric.
The chef grunted as he went back to cooking food, "Alright, head to the back room."
Me and Killua looked at each other, before shrugging and doing as the chef said. We walked to the back of the restaurant and entered a hallway. There was a room to our left and a supply room to our right. We opened the left door and a saw round table and three chairs around it. Brown tiles and yellow walls decorated the interior, with a double door on the other side of the room.
We walked in, closed the door behind us, and inspected the room. The double doors had handles on them. I tested them to find the doors locked. But it looked as though they were supposed to slide open. I looked up to see a small screen above the double doors.
Killua got it a second early than me, "It's an elevator. Pretty clever."
With that, the whole room shook before a mechanical whirring and a sudden drop signaled our descent. I shrugged and sat down. Killua took a seat as well.
We both stared at the elevator screen as it the number of levels increasing. With a slump of my shoulders and a tired sigh, I turned to Killua.
"Jeez, this place is deep. We're already thirty floors down and it ain't stopping. What do you think is down here?"
Killua shrugged.
"Beat's me. But it makes sense that it's hard to get to. No point in hiding Exam site if it was easy to get to, right?"
I frowned, "Yeah. Seems excessive though. I mean, how many people died on that train?"
I tried my best to pull my punches, but I'm pretty sure some people died as a result of my blows. Even if I held back by like, seventy percent. To say nothing of the people that I knocked out and died as a result of the train cars tumbling down a mountain...
"Tch. If you keep thinking like that, you'll be the one dead, ya' know that?" Killua said with dismissive eyes.
I narrowed my eyes at Killua, "What do you mean?"
Killua rolled his eyes, "Don't take it the wrong way, but you think about others too much. It holds you back when you fight."
"Well, yeah, I don't want to kill anyone if I don't have to."
The boy assassin sighed, "I'm not saying that's bad. What you said on the train about me... You're right: my first instinct is to kill. But... I don't want to do that kind of stuff anymore. That's why I was so annoyed when you said it," he said, begrudgingly, turning away from me.
When he turned back, his stare was icy cold, "But killing on purpose and by accident are too different things. I don't want to kill anymore, but that doesn't mean I won't."
I nodded as I reluctantly accepted the advice from Killua, "You're saying, if it's between me and someone else, me first?"
It seemed obvious... but considering my track record with fighting, Killua did have a good point. I did hold back too much.
The boy nodded his head and turned to me with a finger up in the air, "Yeah... You can't think about your opponent's well-being in a fight. If you do, they'll take advantage of it and kill you. You're strong enough to have gotten away with it back on the train, but against someone on your level... you'll be killed."
A memory flashed. My battle with Caesar...
But then my mind was assaulted by new memories... I saw myself in third-person, fighting off dozens of Belban apes like a killing machine. That wasn't me... I don't remember...
Ding.
The elevator sounded as we arrived at our floor. The double doors slid open to reveal a large, and frankly terrifying, underground tunnel that looked straight out of a creepypasta. Or, like, H.R Giger was consulted to give this city's maintenance workers nightmares. There wasn't much to see other than creepiness... The floor was just dirt and concrete. Yellowish white tiles that made up the walls gave this place sinister overtones. There were gross, eerie, organic-looking pipes and wiring that ran across the walls. They looked like veins and arteries, which made the place look even more disturbing. There were rows of red, round lights on either side of the tunnel that was the icing on the creepy cake. The tunnel was gigantic; you could fit a plane in this place and still have some room.
Oh yeah, it was as dark as midnight, and the only lights down here were the red lights on the wall. It took a moment for my eyes to get used to the darkness. Thank god Panza taught me the trick to use my peripherals to see in the dark. It wasn't night vision by any stretch, but it helped.
There were less than a hundred people here, which was funny to me since it reminded me of shitty prom. Everyone standing around waiting, awkwardly, not knowing what to do. All the candidates had a round, white number tag. As if we were contestants for some reality show. As the people stared at us in the elevator, I simultaneously scoped out the competition.
I could see the sniper woman already, her red hair pointing her out instantly. She gave us a quick look before ignoring our existence. She was number eighty. I could see Tonpa's fat ass over to the left in his fugly man-dress, number sixteen. A guy with a tiny ponytail and the squarest fucking head I've ever seen. He looked like Hammerhead from Spiderman. He was seventy-six. A green-headed guy with a sword about my age was thirty-four. A midget in a pink turban that reminded me of pink doo-doo from Digimon was fifty-three.
There were more people... but only one person sent chills down my spine. That was the guy who looked like a clown or a jester. He was outfitted, head to toe, like a living card. He even had the playing card symbols on the front and back of his short, white shirt. His hair was as red as sniper woman, but it fit him in the same way red fit blood. He wore face paint, with a star on his right side and a teardrop on his left. Underneath his white shirt was a weird pink shirt, a yellow cloth wrapped around his waist, white pants, and pointy, curved, navy-colored shoes finished his attire. His outfit was hideous and stupid looking, and I'd had laughed if it weren't for the fact looking at him made me feel like running away...
There was something... off about him. It was as if I could see something glowing around him: an intense, sinister power that radiated off him. Like an angler fish luring prey to their doom. The sad thing was I was just good enough to recognize it was a taunt, but weak enough that it felt like the scariest thing alive. I couldn't help but shake.
But that power would disappear and reappear like a flickering candle. A white... aura thing would appear, quickly go way and revert to a thin film around him. But the atmosphere around him didn't go away.
I did my best not to stare at him. It felt like I was going insane. No one else that I met had that kind of sinister sensation or power. None that I knew of, at least...
There was one thing I knew...
He was terrifyingly powerful.
As we walked out of the elevator, I turned to Killua. My body was as tense as a coiled spring.
"You're right. Thanks for the advice. I'll try my best to overcome that bad habit of mine... And... I never said thank you for saving my life back on the train. So thanks Killua, you're awesome."
Killua looked at me for a moment, before turning away to hide a blush, "Don't thank me. And don't say stupid things like that..."
I laughed for a second before looking back at the crowd of rivals, my face reverted to as stoic mask. I felt nervous... and excited. Nervous because I didn't know what to expect. Excited because there were finally people close to my strength...
Finally... I could see how far I've come. Well, as long as I stayed far away from that clown. I didn't have to be a genius to understand that was Nen. It was the same thing that happened to me back on the train, except I could see it on someone.
But if that was Nen, it's potential was horrifying and immense...
It excited me.
My mouth wanted to break out in a grin, but I held it in. The atmosphere was tense, but so was the train. So were thousands of situations in my old life. Uncountable. I was used to that already, so with my new strength and confidence... the tension in the air made me strangely euphoric... it felt like I was waiting for the start of a celebration. So the atmosphere wasn't the issue. It was that clown.
He was staring at us...
That did not excite me. That terrified me.
While I kept my eyes on the crowd of people staring at us, I turned to Killua. I had a feeling Kill had the same thought in his head.
I whispered under my breath, "You noticed too, huh?"
Killua was skilled. Incredibly skilled. While it was obvious I had my guard up, even with one hand in my pocket, Killua looked like he had his guard wide open as we walked down the tunnel. He had a hand behind his head as he looked like a bored child, but his whispered voice told a different story. He was absolutely ready to fight, but not these bums. And they were bums compared to him...
"Yeah. That clown guy is dangerous. Stay away from him," he said as seriously as I ever heard him speak. As though I was the child and he was the adult.
"Hey, you don't have to tell me twice. I don't even want to look at him," I whispered under my breath. That man... he felt stronger than even Briannaisa. And she could beat my ass without even trying when she wasn't holding back. The clown was closer to Mayer's strength...
I don't think even Killua could fight that guy and win...
My face almost broke out into confusion as a... walking bean in a business suit came up to us. I looked at Killua, who was barely restraining his confusion. But, to the assassin's credit, he hid his confusion masterfully well. Still, I could tell he was just as weirded out as I was. Who wouldn't be when a walking, talking Lima bean greets you?
"Hello, you two. Here are your number badges. Please wear those badges on your chest at all times and take care not to lose it. Both of you are early. So it'll be some time until the exam starts. Please, make yourselves comfortable while you wait. Good luck," The walking, talking bean said. He walked away towards a foldable table full of badges.
I looked at my badge. I was 100 while Killua was 99. I couldn't help but smile.
"Hehe, I got a higher number than you. I'm already winning."
Killua looked at me dismissively, but there was a small smile on his face "Or, I'm ahead of you, which I am. Besides, you'll probably lose it immediately."
I blew out air like a whale surfacing. I didn't even bother to defend myself. I did lose that damn candy.
"Yeah, knowing myself I probably will. But, being the responsible adult I am, I'll blame you. I have to set an example, you know?" I said with a grin.
Killua stared up at me with one eyebrow raised, "How will it be my fault?"
"You kept telling me yesterday, while we were watching TV, how you'll be the reason I'll pass. Remember? So making sure I keep my badge safe is your responsibility too."
Killua tapped his chin as he looked up at the ceiling, "Oh yeah... good point. Then I'll take responsibility when you fail. You really are a good role model!" he said with a sincere, yet facetious smile. I don't know how that's possible, but I was staring at it.
"Don't say it like it's inevitable I'll fail!" I roared.
We walked deep into the tunnel until we found a spot and moseyed on over to one side of the tunnel and made it our HQ. I sat down on a large pipe that ran across the floor. Killua decided to ride around on his skateboard to kill time. People continued to stare at us, analyzing us, trying to get the measure of our strength. They were also trying to figure out why we were together. We did make a peculiar pair. A white/silver-haired kid and a red/purple/brown/light-dependent haired colored man who looked like Agent 47 who stole the Lucky Charm Leprechaun's suit.
Alright, my suit wasn't that green, it's almost black. But it seemed unnecessarily... stupid to wear. I liked green, in fact it was my favorite color. I hated wearing a green suit though.
"Yeah, your suit is kinda stupid looking. Why are you wearing it anyways?" Killua said, reading my mind while riding around on his skateboard.
I gave Killua a flat look. It was annoying how he could read what I was thinking, as well as how I couldn't dominate the conversation all the time with a child. The kid was smarter than me, but honestly not by much. Pairo was on another planet compared to either of us. Killua was usually a step or two quicker than I was, but usually by a second. It was his experience and training as an assassin that really separated us. It gave the boy an eye for detail.
It also gave him annoyingly telepathic powers or some shit. And since I was good at reading people too, he wasn't shy about doing it to me just to fuck with me. If I wasn't on my toes, he would read my thoughts via my body language, eyes, or facial expressions.
I mean, I could do that too, but it was weird being at the other end of it.
Jeez, is this how it felt for other people when I did that to them? Pfft, that must suck! Man, I'm starting to realize how awesome I am!
Oh dear, I think I'm becoming a god...
I laughed and shook my head, escaping my thoughts before my head became any more inflated that it'd pop.
I turned my head to Killua and spoke up, "Only Tao Long by blood wear it... It's supposed to show that I'm one of the heads of the Family to any other Tao Longs members. Keep a secret, but I'm supposed to be the heir to the Tao Long," I whispered.
It was the reason why Evira and Flole wore these stupid suits. It was why I was forced to wear this stupid suit. It was also why I didn't buy new clothes when I could have bought something else.
Plus, these clothes are bullet-resistant. So...
I managed to get the bloodstains off my clothing. Peroxide baby... It took a while, though. I also cleaned Killua's clothing while I was at it. I also bought a pair of clothing for both us while we were walking Zaban. He'd been wearing his clothing for a while before he went on that train and they stunk when he got off the train. I don't know when I became this kid's nanny, but like I keep saying, this fucking trip was far too mundane and tedious for my liking...
Killua didn't even wear the new clothes I bought him to the Exam, but his old one instead. He only wore his new clothes when I cleaned his old clothes! I should have made him clean his own damn clothes...ragfragin' kid...
Killua's eyebrows perked up. He kicked his skateboard into the air and caught it before walking over to me. He crouched down next to my feet and sat on his skateboard. The boy placed two hands on either side of the board and rolled back and forth while sitting.
"You're the heir to your family?" the boy assassin said, looking up at me from his place on the floor.
I wanted to say no. I also wanted to say it wasn't my family. Instead I said yes.
"Huh. Me too. I don't want to though. I don't like my family. My family's annoying," Killua said as he rolled left and right while sitting on his skateboard.
"Yeah... I don't want to either. I only found out recently. Briannaisa got pissed at me for it," I said.
"You mean the brown-headed maid?"
My eyes widened in surprise, "Yeah, you met her?"
Killua nodded, "I used to do jobs for your aunt. Your aunt introduced me to her. From what I remember she only started two years ago, but I met that maid the most. Before that it, was some blonde woman or a short red head."
"Oh. Makes sense she would want guards around when meeting an assassin. Though I'm surprised Mayer wasn't there. Eh, they're strong enough to handle you," I said with a smirk as I deflected his underlying question.
Killua gave me a flat look, "Yeah, yeah. You know she was trained at my butler's place, right? As a favor to Mayer? I could probably beat her and the blonde maid..." he finished by looking away and grumbling.
"What, at butlering? What does that matter? They're strong as hell," I rubbed my throat where 'Naisa choked the holy hell out of me. I would have rubbed the parts of my body where the sisters shot me with rubber bullets, but that was almost every square inch of my body.
He raised an eyebrow, analyzing look falling on me, "Huh, you really don't know anything? Shouldn't you know more about your Family?"
I pushed the hell out of the kid, launching him down the tunnel on his skateboard to hide my identity. Surprisingly, Killua was laughing in enjoyment. He skateboarded back to me in a few seconds.
"Hey, do that again! This time push harder! I wanna see how far I can go!" Killua said, surprisingly childlike for a genius assassin. Then again, he was a child.
I laughed. I guess housing, feeding, and doing the kid's laundry earned me some trust.
I waved my free hand at the Killua, "Nah, later. I shouldn't be showing these guys my strength anyways."
Killua put a hand behind his head and frowned, but he was understanding, "Yeah, I guess you're right. Must suck having to worry about the competition."
He said that completely honest, but not as an insult either; so I didn't take it as one. I shrugged my shoulders, "Maybe, but I remember how I felt yesterday after I fought the Samurai. It must suck walking through life without a challenge."
The boy looked up at the ceiling, "Yeah..." then he looked at me with a smile and a jab of his thumb to his chest, "that's why you should push me around so I won't be so bored!"
"Later. After the exam. We'll find a hill or something and I'll push you down it."
"Fine..." Killua said as he kicked the floor. He turned to my weapon and pointed at it.
"Hey, can I see your sword?"
I shrugged. I grabbed Stick and handed it over to Killua. He started swinging it around with experience. I guess he was trained in how to use a sword since he was swinging it on a skateboard without busting his ass.
"I never got to ask Mayer why he used a SuburitÅ," Killua said as he continued swung my sword around, before deciding to use it to paddle himself around like gondolier.
"It's 'cause those are made from a World Tree. And since a World Tree takes nutrients and metals from the magma they eat, that thing is insanely durable and flexible. It's basically unbreakable. You've seen how big and strong Mayer is! What sword would handle his strength? Answer: one made out of the biggest tree in the world. Besides, he said he doesn't like using sharp weapons."
"Huh. I wanna see a World Tree now," he said, curiosity in his eyes.
"What, you never get out of your house?"
Killua shook his head as he continued to play Charon as he ferried souls down the river Styx of this tunnel. The fact his balance was good enough that he could row while not having the board slide under him was impressive. But, he could also tear down doors and disappear from sight, so it comes with the territory.
"Nah. Not really. Only time I ever went out was to do jobs or for training. Whenever Grandpa tried to take me out to do something fun, my mom would usually find out and stop it."
"That sucks..." I said as I stared at Killua. My heart went out to him, living like that.
He shrugged. The boy looked down at the floor as he paddled himself. He looked all of a normal kid playing around. But I could tell he was debating whether or not if he wanted to say anymore. I guess he came to a decision since he spoke.
"I don't like my family. The only ones I care for are my Grandpa and my sister Alluka. I guess Kalluto too, but she's too clingy. My dad... I guess I respect him. I hate my mom, Illumi, and Milluki though."
I looked at the boy with surprise before nodding. Family is a... strange thing. Especially one in a world with more than mundane problems.
"Hey maybe, " I was about to say 'in this world' before my higher brain functions kicked in, "when you get your Hunter License you can live how you like?"
I remembered that the age of majority is weird here. It's almost 'whenever you can survive on your own', which makes sense with real-life dragons, giant beasts, and supernatural serial killers roaming about. Your family members die? Whelp either join an orphanage or good luck kid. Hope you can survive.
This Earth was not a nice or easy place to live. At all. Like Meteor City. Meteor City made the worst places in Detroit look like paradise by comparison, and I hadn't even seen the place. It's only from the sparse images and information I had uploaded into my brain that I knew how bad it was.
Killua shrugged before looking at me, "Like I told you, I don't really care about getting a Hunter License. I just thought it'd be fun."
I rubbed my chin, thinking over how to ask a child genius paddling around on a skateboard their heart's desire.
"So, what do you want then?"
Killua shrugged...
"I don't know."
He wasn't lying... but as good as Killua was... I could tell the boy wasn't telling the truth either.
Hours ticked by. Waiting for the other candidates was both boring and nerve-racking. Every time I heard the elevator open up my eyes would turn to my left to check out the competition. The excitement had gone away almost an hour in and then it was mostly waiting and fighting off sleep and stress. It no longer felt like the beginning of a celebration, but the drowning atmosphere of taking an actual exam. Like a final for the toughest class you had in school, you were failing, and you had to wait in that fucking classroom for a few hours before the exam. No, there was no curve.
Ok, I'm done with my school-based analogizes for the rest of the Hunter Exam.
I just wanted to get this Exam started with...
My fault for coming early? Yeah, but I'd rather be four hours early than a minute late. I also had the early-bird advantage of hiding in a crowd versus walking into a group of four-hundred people strong who would instantly analyze you the moment you stepped out the elevator. Mentally, that would probably feel like walking into a pit of vipers or a den of lions. I rather have the mental advantage of being one of those vipers or lions instead of the unsuspecting fool.
Even if, in this case, I hated the wait.
At least the two exercises Killua gave me kept my mind from stressing too much. Killua told me to practice measuring people's strength and Killing Intent while he dicked around killing time. So, here I was, looking over people and comparing them to all the creatures and people I fought or knew. From sizing the competition up by their body language, or how comfortable they were in this atmosphere and environment, to how they held their weapons. Shit, even the smallest things like how they stood next to the other competitors and their eye movements.
Were they keeping their guard up? And if so, what, when, where, how, and why? Then how, what, where, and when to strike them. I used the four principles Panza taught me as well: Ten, Zetsu, Ren, Hatsu; Point, Tongue, Temper, Release. Think, visualize, will, act.
It was exhausting. A real chore mentally, but I was getting the hang of it. I was starting to get a true understanding of people's abilities and strengths, where before it was rough guesses and vague assumptions. It wasn't a hundred percent correct now, but it would help.
As for my Killing Intent: no one came near me in four hours. I glared and focused my intent to hurt and kill any person who thought they could stare me down. I had no reason to be intimidated either. I was was super strong, fast, and good with a sword: so why the hell would I be scared of these fucking punks? All that, and my new face was why most people stopped staring at me once I locked eyes. Killing Intent would be useful, no doubt, but it would only work against cowards and weaklings. Something that was in short supply during the Exam.
I can say that it helped me in the short term, even if I never use it again. It's a lot less stressful when everyone is intimidated by you.
The question was... where did Nen fall in all this? Killua's killing intent was a short burst, something like how it felt with the monkeys at the White Death. It was a warning. You feel it at the back of your neck and your stomach drops. Like, "OH FUCK!", but then it quickly disappears. Clyde was a literal force. It took all my will to move when he did it against Mr- I mean Ms. Kittie Cat.
At least while I was doing homework from Killua, said small child had been bugging Tonpa by hitting him up every few hours for drinks. I could tell that pissed off that fat asshole. It was beautiful seeing the blue Teletubby confused as to why his drinks weren't working. Yet he also couldn't deny the kid drinks, or he'd risk revealing he was a snake. The entire time Killua acted like they were regular drinks, so Tonpa was all the more confused. It was a sight to behold.
It was hard not to smile, but I did it somehow. Hehehe...
I will get my revenge.
The coldness inside me disappeared as the last group arrived right before the Exam started. When they did, everyone turned around to see who they were.
Surprisingly, it was one kid, one teen, and one adult.
The kid was a boy, probably the same age as Killua. He had a green jacket, green shorts that were... way too short Jesus... and green boots. He had a yellow and brown backpack and he had, for whatever reason, a fishing rod. He had spiky, dark green colored hair when he was in the light of the elevator, but that was black in the darkness of the tunnel. The kid had a bright face and brown eyes. I could tell he was strong since he was looked comfortable in this den of killers. Besides, he had to be strong to get here... but he didn't radiate strength like the teen next to him.
The teen was, from looks of it, a girl with short, blonde hair. She had a blue and red tabard thing with a white long sleeve shirt and pants underneath. Maybe she was from the same country as Pairo, since it looked awfully similar to Pairo's clothing for it to be just a coincidence. She also had a grey bag with the shoulder strap wrapped around her, well, shoulder. Her face was intense, with eyes that analyzed everything in front of her. She had grey eyes that screamed 'too intelligent' the same way Pairo or Killua's did. She had a pair of weapons concealed behind her back, though I couldn't tell what they were.
I'd have to watch out for her...
As she scanned the crowd in front of her, her the eyes landed on mine for a split second, before turning back to rescan the crowd. In that second it felt like she measured me completely. I immediately realized two things: she might be stronger than me in terms of fighting, but she was definitely far smarter and more experienced than I was...
I filed her away with all the other people that were capable kicking my ass (some way more capable than others): Hanzo Hattori from Samurai Showdown, Pennywise, Pinhead, Pink-Poo-Poo Turban Robin Hood, Los Three Amigos (maybe), Master Pai Mei, Grown-Up Donnel from Awakening, Pacifier Hat Woman Aka Female Koenma, Snoop Dogg and his pipe, Fat Ryuji Yamazaki, Snake Charmer Enemy from Aladdin the game...
I didn't add the Cottonball Kid to that list since he was on my side...
...
These nicknames give me strength, ok? Eat it.
A small, quick smile at my thoughts and I turned to the last of the trio. He was a tall man, probably an inch or two taller than me. Black suit, black tie, black sunglasses signaled him to be some type of criminal. That, or he had the terrible sense to wear that kinda clothes when the Mafia ruled most of the world from the darkness. Other than the clothes, the mobster looked like an average person with blacked eyes and short, black hair. He was holding a black and red checkered suitcase over his shoulder. The man had to be at least as old as me from the way he carried himself and how old his face looked.
Those three made an unusual group, but so did me and Killua. The boy yelled something to the crowd, but from where I was I couldn't hear what he was saying. Probably a greeting, or something. That rest of the candidates took to the three new arrivals with, uh, intense indifference. Everyone was getting in the zone. I didn't have the time on me, but I knew the Exam was about to start.
I heard Tony Hawk over here roll up to me on his skateboard, kick it up into the air, and then stand next to me. We stared at the three new arrivals for a moment before I turned to my head to Killua with a grin.
"Hey, looks like there's someone your age here."
He stared at the three at the back of the pack with some interest in his eyes, but he kept his face a mask of indifference. He turned back to me and shrugged.
"Looks like it. Anyway, are you ready? About time to start," Killua said, strangely intense and calm at the same time. He had no reason to be, he was stronger than everyone here, barring one person for sure.
My face mirrored his as I stood up from my seat. I cracked my neck and smiled, "Of course."
I reached down and picked up Stick, placed him in front of me and leaned on him both my hands.
It. I mean It. Not him... The fuck?
I shook my head.
We waited patiently in silence for a few minutes. That was, until we heard a scream at the entrance. We couldn't hear or see anything other than, well, screaming.
"Looks like someone's already been 'disqualified'. If I had to guess who did it, I'd say it's Hisoka..." Killua said with eyes of a cold-blooded killer.
I guess the clown was named Hisoka...
My eyes stayed on Killua for a good minute, assessing the boy. He must have picked up on Hisoka's name from asking the crowd or his hearing. I was both thankful and sad at how calm, collected, and experienced he was in a situation like this.
Minutes ticked by. The atmosphere grew more oppressive with each second. The crowd moved and fidgeted as the tunnel quieted. The whole area became as grave as a cemetery. The contestants started to become impatient, trained killers and monsters growing agitated at what was to come. It was a swirling miasma of tension so thick it felt like we were waiting for our turn to go over the trench and into No Man's Land. Or as though we were anticipating the sounding of trumpets to signal the beginning of gladiatorial combat. I could see people trying to hide quick glances to their left and right, sizing people up as they readied themselves for battle.
The Exam was maybe only ten minutes late and people were already getting this antsy...
Even Killua was serious, but I only knew that from being around him for two days straight. Otherwise, he looked bored. I was primed as well, ready to fight at the drop of a hat. But I'll be honest, being around someone helped me stay calm. It gave me more confidence than if I were alone; even if that someone was a child. A terrifyingly powerful child, but a child nonetheless.
Then, without warning, the weirdest alarm clock in the world rang. It sounded like a tiny creature laughing. It echoed through the tunnel, causing everyone to snap out of their battle focus. The sound came from the other side of the wall at the front of the tunnel, causing everyone to turn forward, many of who were ready for the worst. All of a sudden, the sound stopped as the wall started to rise. Appearing before us was a man who was dressed like a butler. He had purple hair that was styled like Trunks from Dragon Ball Z, but shorter and curled at the tips. He had dull eyes and a mouth so small and tight that it seemed like he had no mouth at all. He was holding on to a green thing with a string.
I turned to Killua who shrugged. I had no idea what to make of this as well. I turned to the crowd of candidates, almost all of them focused to their absolute limit on this one man. I saw one guy who was gripping his sword so hard drops of blood leaked from his hand.
I turned back to the Examiner as he started speaking, "I apologize for the delay. Thank you for waiting. The entry period for the for Hunter Applicants is officially closed. So, without further ado, the Hunter Exam will now begin!"
I rolled my eyes. I looked down at Killua who grunted, indifference plastered on his face.
"One final word of caution... If you are short on luck or ability, keep in mind that there's a very real chance you could end up seriously injured. Death is another distinct possibility. If you're willing to accept the risks involved, I'll ask you to follow me now. But, for the rest of you, kindly exit through the elevator located behind you."
No one moved. If the people on the train, who were only human, were ready to improvise the movie Snowpiercer to get to the exam site... well these fuckers here in this tunnel were ready to remake Battle Royale.
"Right then. Very well. All four hundred and four applicants will now participate in Phase One," he turned began to turn around...
My eyes widened as I saw the thin forcefield that appeared and disappeared at random on Hisoka come to life on the examiner... I squeezed my eyes shut and it was gone. What the fuck is going on with me... why can I see it only sometimes?
Before I could dwell on my thoughts, the Hunter began to walk... But the way a weird person would walk... Slowly kicking his legs and swinging his arms stiffly, like a robot trying to walk after reading a description of it from a book. I felt like I was being mocked.
What is this, Monty Python? This guy definitely belonged to the Ministry of Silly Walks...
All of us started walking, slowly. But soon the pace picked up as we were running faster and faster until, if I had to guess, we were running fifteen kilometers an hour. About nine miles per hour.
The Hunter introduced himself as Satotz, then explained we just needed to follow him. I didn't sense any deception or trickery in his words, so I shrugged. All we had to do was keep up?
Endurance? Pfft...
We continued to jog after the strange fellow, not even breaking a sweat. It was more annoying keeping the pace. Making sure not to bump into people in front of me or slow down into the people behind me. This was nothing... I was used to running far faster than this...
The only good thing was I was starting to feel awake. Thank god. I was worried I would fall asleep or something. Still, I didn't feel a hundred percent, but I didn't need to be a hundred percent to run this.
I AM RUNNING ITSELF!
I chuckled to myself and stared down at Killua. He was bored. All pretenses of keeping his guard up disappeared as we ran. I felt the same way, almost...
The kid left my side after the first hour. No longer feeling like he needed to protect me, Killua fell to the back of the crowd. I had a feeling I knew what he was up to. That funny thing where you see a little kid build up the courage to make a new friend.
Hehehe.
For the next hour after that, I thought of ways to bug Killua with the fact he made a new friend. That kid was super self-conscious. That kept me entertained through this nothing of a test...
That was until I noticed a trio looking at me. They looked at me exactly how a bunch of bullies or gangbangers would at a mark. It was the Three Amigos. Or, if they were stupid enough to mess with me, the Three Stooges.
They gathered around me from three directions: two to my sides and one in front. If they tried something, that would have been a mistake. I was stronger than each of them individually. Together it'd be tough, but all I had to do was push one of these fuckers over and they'd be stampeded. So I held back and practiced my Killing Intent again. I glared at the one to my left, a blonde dude with an orange beanie. All three of them backed off a few feet before regrouping and surrounding me again. Two to my sides and one in front of me again...
Alright, I knew that Killing Intent wasn't going to work on everyone. But I didn't expect it to immediately fail. I rolled my eyes and looked back at the guy to my left.
The blonde gave me a greasy smile, "Hey, hey. No reason to be unfriendly to a couple of 'friends', right?"
They were going to intimidate me in 3, 2, 1...
The bigger one in front of me in a yellow, striped shirt with black hair and a reverse cap spoke up.
"Besides, we know you're a Tao Long. And, seeing how the Tao Long don't have many friends out of York New... you should try to be friendly with the ones you do have."
The thinnest, smallest one to my right who was in a blue sweater, a teal and white cap, and brown hair spoke next.
"You wouldn't want other candidates to find out and get angry, right? You wouldn't want to die, right? Might as well give up right now or things might get rough."
I rolled my eyes and sighed.
We continued to run in silence for a minute. They kept smiling at me. Apparently, the fact I was indifferently staring forward like a hot jogger being hit on wasn't enough of a hint that I didn't care.
"Ah. Looks like Tao Long here is a shy one. Don't worry, you don't have to say anything. Just stop running and your secret is safe with us," the blonde said.
That pissed me off.
I stared at him, coldly, with the corners of my eyes.
"Go ahead."
The three of them looked confused. The brown-haired idiot to my left spoke up.
"I don't think you understand what you're saying. If word gets ou-"
I cut him off, "No, no I understand completely," I said, monotone, as I went back to staring in front of me. Completely calm but angry, "I'm guessing there are a few mobsters from the other Families here, right? They'll be gunning for me after you three bozos tell everyone. So I repeat: Go ahead. I'm not fucking stopping."
The one to my right gave sneer me a sneer before talking, "You're an idiot. Well, have fun dying."
They started to separate from me, but before they could go, I spoke up, "Just so you know. The moment we have a chance to fight, I'm break you three like sticks," I turned to the apparent leader of the group, the blonde, "Understand me?"
I hit them with Killing Intent, but this one I didn't need to try. They sweated underneath my stare, but their leader mustered through it with a cocky smile, barely, "Crystal. Too bad you'll be dead by the next phase."
With that, the three disappeared into the rest of the crowd like ghosts. No doubt disseminating my identity like the snitches they were. I felt someone stare at me from behind, so I turned around to see Tonpa smirking at me...
He was better than I thought. He knew I knew about him and his scummy ways. What the fuck was wrong with this guy?
I slowed down until I was running alongside Tonpa. On his left side.
"Your the one who's behind this?" I said, staring daggers at the man.
He gave me a cocky look as he chuckled.
"I'm surprised you managed to get to the Hunter Exam. Most years they flunk whoever gets the questions wrong. I guess they'll let anyone into the Exam nowadays."
My glare at him was more potent than Superman's Heat Vision. If only I could will it...
"Hey now. You got this far, didn't ya? Unfortunately, I couldn't let you ruin my fun..."
I looked away from Tonpa and back to the rest of the joggers, the rage inside me went from boiling hot to numbing cold...
"Ya' know, I wasn't going to say anything, right? By the way, how could you trick me so easily?" I asked, genuinely curious he beat my ability to read him.
He chuckled again, "I've done this a long time, and I've seen your type before. You're smart, smarter than most people. Surprisingly, those types are the easiest to trick. All you have to do to lower their guard is give them a little trust with some info. After that, all you gotta do is act like a fool or be intimidated. Then you've got them. I read it in your eyes... It was so easy to give it to you. It wasn't even that hard of a lie... and it's easy to lie when you've been doing it for as long as me..."
Ah. I guess I learned a lesson here. I'm just as easily read, huh? Or maybe he was just that experienced? He was good enough to fool my baby Sherlock Scan. And I'm not used to being surrounded by people this clever... Fair enough...
I smiled at the man. One filled with arrogance, greed, and malice. The one I used to use when trying to fit in around my old neighborhood. Time to blow smoke up his ass...
"Got me good. How are you so good at lying?"
The man rubbed a finger under his nose for some reason while closing an eye, "All you gotta do is believe your lie. I genuinely believe I'm being friendly and nice, but deep down it's all a ruse. I almost fall for it myself sometimes. If you can trick yourself, you can trick anybody..."
Control yourself and control the world.
I laughed as I looked at him, impressed. A real application of my stupid mantra that the therapist gave me all those years. I wanted to laugh like a madman.
"Ya' shoulda' told me then. I'd have helped you, ya' know? I like wreaking havoc as well," I said truthfully.
He raised an eyebrow. There was a gleam of scumbag respect in his eyes.
"That was pretty good, kid. You're a quick learner. I almost believed ya' for a second. I almost feel bad about sicking all the mobsters taking the Exam on you."
I nodded, no reason to deny my lie, "By the way. How'd ya' know that I was a mobster?"
Tonpa smirked, "I didn't, but you look like one. I asked the Amori brothers, and they live in York New City. They know all about the Tao Long Family. And they love money, and I love crushing rookies..."
I opened my mouth, silently saying 'ah' as I looked forward towards the crowd in front of me. My eyes were half-lidded.
Tonpa chuckled before speaking, "If you're thinking about trying something, don't. You'll get disqualified from the Exam if you try anything..."
I stared forward, not even bothering to look at Tonpa. My ears could pick up the laughter and amusement in his voice I continued to nonchalantly jog with Stick in my right hand. Right next to the fat man.
I didn't have to look at him to tell he was lying.
"Hmm. You're right. I'm am a quick learner. Thanks for teaching me how better spot a lie and to lie better..."
I stared at him from the corner of my eye. He raised an eyebrow at me, his cocky smile showing he was genuinely flattered, while at the same time telling me he didn't care about me whatsoever. I guess all rookies were toys to him... their broken dreams his trophies...
His eyes widened in fear.
"Even if that wasn't the biggest load of horse shit I ever heard... I'll give you some advice. Don't try to be calculating when you're bad at math. I'm not particularly reasonable when angry or..."
I left my sentence hanging on purpose, diverting his full attention to my words and eyes instead of my right arm as I struck. Before the fat man could react, I jabbed Stick between his legs mid-stride. I did a little hop and slowed down as he started to fall forward in front of me with a yelp. I transitioned my left knee to meet Tonpa's face, hiding it behind the act of raising my legs to avoid tangling with the rookie crusher's body. The back of my right hand pulled Stick from between his legs as, in one smooth motion, I quickly pushed Tonpa's skull into the path of my knee with my left hand. Just a simple tap of my left palm to the back of his head. At the same time my knee collided with his face.
All in the blink of an eye.
That was more than enough force to knock him out while still looking like it was an accident...
All the consciousness instantly drained out of him as he dropped face-first to the floor, limp as a doll.
I stuttered forward to my right and hoped over Tonpa's prone body. I ran to the side of the tunnel to let the rest of the candidates go past me. I watched as several people, either by accident or on purpose, run over the piece of shit. Most of them had the decency to hop or run around the human roadblock.
I wish they didn't.
Three people stared at me as they passed by. The ninja, the clown, and the blonde girl. All three of them had different stares.
The clown was amused.
The ninja was disgusted.
And the blonde girl thought I was vile.
Guess that was his dead man's switch. No wonder he was ingratiating himself with so many rookies. Though, if I wasn't on the clown's radar before, I think I was now...
I sighed. Standing there on the side with my arms crossed, I stared back at the three with feigned indifference as they disappeared deeper into the tunnel. I waited for close to a minute until I spotted Killua with that green-haired kid. Good, they were in the back of the pack. Just where I wanted to be. I didn't want people to be behind me, and it would be easy to spot anyone trying to sabotage me if they fell back without looking tired.
Also, I was waiting to be disqualified.
I laughed.
Aaahhh...
Fuck you Tonpa...
Most times I hate my temper. This time I loved it.
It felt good knocking Tonpa out. But, otherwise, this test was boring. All I wanted to do was go on cruise control, make sure no one fucked with me, and/or fuck around. I could run circles around these people, even tired as I was, but that would be stupid. I already showed some of my capabilities by knocking out Tinky Winky over here. Revealing any more of my strengths to the rest of these goons so they can use it against me. Dumb move...
Besides, I wanted to do something smart like twirl around my sword like a marching band member to ease my boredom. Really smart stuff. The smartest...
I looked up at the ceiling as I thought over what I needed to do. Honestly, I needed to be just paranoid enough. Being too paranoid and high strung will sap my strength by causing me to be too stressed out and tense, but being too relaxed and overconfident will also kill me faster. An annoying balancing act.
I sighed as started running again once the pack was far enough ahead of me. I hung back so Killua could have is little playdate, PFFT...
The only people back here was Sunglasses over to my left and a few other candidates that were basically about to quit or collapse. Nine miles per hour, really? That's it? Get the fuck out here...
Man... the worst part of all this was the boredom. Is it possible to be too prepared? I hadn't even broken a sweat yet, but I was still so tired...
My feet continued to march me forward. Another two hours passed me by with tedium. Four hours in and I think we've gone sixty kilometers? A little more than thirty-seven miles...
At this point, people were dropping like flies. We already surpassed a marathon in length and showed no sign of stopping. Not even a peep of sunlight or anything. I, um, found a bunch of stuff just laying on the ground. I got a green backpack filled with supplies. Some bandages, tape, and medicine, some rope (yessssss), some food and water, a box of matches, a small flashlight, a compass...
I also stole a laptop from a fat kid who passed out. I mean... I found a laptop on the floor!
My laptop now. Finders keepers. Hissss...
I held it in my left hand as I used it to offset the annoying balance I had with Stick in my right. I really wanted to check out this laptop later...
Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Give me a computer and I'll take over the world!
...
I'm a COMPUTER SCIENTIST! I KNOW ZST ZCIENCES!
...
That's how Germans sound like. That's how the Domos sound like...
...
Not really...
...
Hnn...
...
FUCK I'M BORED!
I rather fight the mobsters that want me dead down here! Right now! ALL of them! THIS SECOND! But nooo! I saw a bunch of them passed out! All of you fucking suck! So much for 'threat on my life'! This is stupid! This so stupid! I almost wish Mayer didn't make me run with weights 'cause now I feel like I have infinite stamina! How is that a bad thing?! How did this become a bad thing?! Was this a test of endurance or will?! Because right now was neither, just a test of my patience!
Wait...
I remember something...
A niggling, terrible memory...
Oh no! My fighter friend said it took forever for him to get off when he was in super fighting shape... Does that mean it'll take forever for me?! He said sometimes he didn't even get off when he was having sex!
I'M THOUSAND TIMES IN BETTER SHAPE THEN HIM...
NO! GOD!
NO! GOD! PLEASE! NO!
NO!
NO!
NOOOOOOOOO!
I felt an elbow hit my thigh I looked down to see Killua and the green kid from before. Killua was looking at me like I was an id-, well, do I even have to describe it at this point? The other kid looked at me with curiosity and amusement. His eyes were like spotlights of energy and innocence.
It almost felt like being around my dad, but untarnished by the world.
I glanced down at Killua again before speaking, "Hey, what's up blondie? I'm having an existential crisis here... wait, are you a blond since you're like, silverish white? Hmmm..."
I began to think that over before Killua's words cut me off from my thoughts.
"Yeah, this is the idiot I'm talking about. He's the one I came with."
"Hi! I'm Gon! Nice to meet you!" he said with a brilliant smile. He easily ran while holding a fishing pole over one shoulder.
"Nice to meet ya' kid. The names James. I'd shake your hand, but we're running, hehe."
Gon smiled brightly, "No worries! Is it true you and Killua fought an entire train full of people to get here?!"
I shrugged, "Yeah. We got on the wrong train, is all."
Killua spoke up, "Gon came here by ship. He said there was a nasty storm on the way over here. Only three people passed."
Gon nodded, "Mhm, but I'm used to storms like that back on Whale Island! The other two that passed are my friends, Kurapika and Leorio.
"CURR-rap-pee-ku, LEE-O-WRY-O?" I mouthed back like an alien tasting words. These fucking names, man...
The green bundle of energy nodded, "Yeah! Kurapika's really smart, he figured out the question from this lady who gave us a really hard riddle. And Leorio is the guy behind us."
Damn, no compliment for his friend Leorio? Nothing? Wow, I don't know if this kid's savage or brutally honest.
I turned my head around to find the man named Leorio to be the mobster from before. He was dying. He looked how I imagined I was when I was struggling to run all those months ago. But he didn't have the benefit of Flole's power.
"I think your friends about to collapse... or have a heart attack..." I said as I nodded my head back to the man hunched over as he ran, gasping for breath and fighting to move forward.
The three of us turned around to see the man drop his suitcase from exhaustion. He then stopped, grabbed his knees, and panted like a tired dog. Gon slowly stopped and turned around. Me and Killua looked at each other in confusion before stopping as well. We could catch up with the rest of the pack without a problem. The two of us were more curious about the scene unfolding.
Gon stared at the man. It was a stare of conviction and belief in his friend, but as well as one of understanding as well. He knew Leorio was at his limit and he might not continue on. The child accepted that and knew it was up to the man to make his choice. The only thing he could give Leorio was his heartfelt belief and support: all with a single stare. A thousand-word essay couldn't transmit what was in that look.
It surprised me: Gon was far more perceptive and unconsciously wise than a normal kid his age. He was definitely a positive kid. Guess that's why Kill-
Actually! What the fuck?!
I'm pretty sure I was dumber and less wise(subconsciously or otherwise) than either Killua or Gon at their age! I'm also pretty sure I became self-cognizant at sixteen as opposed to, I dunno, ten? How old are these fucking kids? Whatever...
Killua opened his mouth to speak up but, with a small smile, I shook my head. I had a feeling what was going to happen next. Just from Gon's stare alone. I turned back to see Leorio's eyes burned with an unyielding will. It was the will I had when I ran all those damn miles. It was in those eyes...
Heh... Gon didn't need to compliment him. It was plain as day...
This man refused to give up.
Leorio closed his eyes and spoke up, "Man, screw this..."
With the suddenness of a gunshot, he sprinted forward as fast as a world-class sprinter. A vicious grin of respect spread across my face as I saw the man fly forward, straight past us, and right towards the rest of the pack like a bullet. I could hear him roar...
"Screw this! I'm becoming a Hunter, no matter what! Damn it all!"
I hooted and cheered Leorio on as he ran down the tunnel. Hey, I sympathize with him. I was like him a few months back, worse even.
Taking advantage of our timeout from running, I put my laptop into my backpack. Along with its battery that I carried in one of my inner suit pockets. The impact from the fall had damaged the laptop and disconnected the two parts from each other. I would need to tape the battery back onto the laptop when we stopped running INFINITELY...
I shifted my sword to my left hand and turned around to see Gon pulling Leorio's suitcase into the air with his fishing rod and catching it with his free hand. I whistled, impressed at the move.
Killua smiled, "That was awesome!"
I gave a smile of my own as I nodded at Gon, "Well then, guess that fishing rod ain't just for show. Let's get a move on. I'll hold on to that. I'm used to running with stuff on me," I said as I gestured to Gon to give over the suitcase.
Gon nodded and handed over the suitcase without hesitation. Now I felt somewhat balanced again with the suitcase in my right hand.
We turned around and continued running. I couldn't help but give a broad smile. I was meeting all types of interesting people during the exam, and thankfully not all of them malicious assholes like Tonpa.
"Can I try that later?" Killua asked Gon.
"Sure, if I can try your skateboard."
Another hour in and we started climbing an enormous set of stairs. It felt endless. People were falling left and right at the sudden increase in difficulty. I had to hop and move around a few people who decided that collapsing in front of me was the best place to stop. Jerks.
And that was before Satotz decided to pick up the pace. After that, candidates were tumbling down these stairs like barrels being tossed by Donkey Kong.
Meanwhile, I was dancing up this fucking steps like Singing in the Rain. Fuck these people. All courtesy of Mayer and his insane training. I will admit that I was starting to become out of breath.
That was when Killua and Gon had the idea to race up the stairs. And they wanted me to be the referee.
"Fine," At this point, only the best of the best were going to make it. No point in hiding my endurance anymore.
They blasted off forward as I kept up behind them, doing my best not to trip over passed out people.
As we raced forward, we saw Leorio speaking the blonde girl, the man having his shirt and suit tied to his waist. His tie hanging off his neck. He was yelling about money...
Wait...
I realized that wasn't a teenage girl, but a teenage boy. Oh man, dude looks like a lady!
Fuck, now I have that stupid song stuck in my head...
Gon and Killua ran by their side decided to slow down to speak to them. I almost crashed into them and had to run all the way to their right.
"See you at the finish line!" the Green Machine said.
"Yeah! Catch you later, old man," the Cottonball Kid said.
Leorio's face twisted into annoyance as he yelled at Killua, "Hey, I'm not old! Can't you tell I'm a teenager just like you?!"
I nearly stumbled at that. That ma- I mean that teen looked as old as me! Holy shit... He looked like he had a house, a mortgage, a wife, and two kids!
All four of us had a face of pure confusion. After the shock wore off The Green Machine and the Cottonball Kid had the audacity to tell me to keep up. They had no idea who they were talking to.
As I passed Leorio, and I believe Kurapika, they glared at me. I was confused, but I stared back at them with indifference on my face. I guess they didn't trust me; and seeing how Kurapika saw me send Tonpa into Dreamland, he had more than a compelling reason to distrust me.
But, more than that... he was glaring at me with barely restrained hate. That I didn't care for...
I didn't make a face or try to antagonize them. I just stayed silent and kept up to Gon and Killua. Gon was a good kid, and if they were his friends they couldn't be all bad. They're probably just suspicious of me being around two kids is all. Fair enough.
Well, for Leorio at least. I don't know why Kurapika was giving me daggers, even if I hurt Tonpa. There was no way he knew Tonpa that much, and I did this Exam a service. And, if he did know Tonpa, then Kurapika could eat horse dicks.
Who was he to judge me? He didn't know me. Honestly, that pissed me off.
Whatever. I kept on running, but I kept my guard up. No need to suddenly 'trip' a mile or so up these stairs...
"Hey wait! That's my suitcase!" I heard Leorio scream as I pulled away from him and Kurapika.
I turned around with a grin.
"Think of this as a token of my respect for your will. No need to thank me."
"I don't want any of your respect! Just hand over the suitcase to Kurapika and we're even..."
My eyes narrowed as I turned my gaze to the blonde teen. His glare was more than capable of sending grown men fleeing. I could feel it.
Not me though.
I looked up a the ceiling as I mimed thinking, "Mmm... Nah. I don't like how he's looking at me. I'll hold on to it until we get to the top, kid. Think of it as an incentive to finish this Stairway to Heaven..."
Ah, god damnit. Now I have that song stuck in my head...
"Hey! Give me back my suitcase!" Leorio roared with a shake of his fist.
I grinned, saluted him with my left hand and began running faster to catch up with pokemon trainer Green, and pokemon trainer White. All the while singing.
"There's a lady who's sure. All that glitters is gold. And she's buying a stairway to heaven..."
My voice trailed behind me as I bounced up the stairs by four or five steps to catch up to the two kids. I could hear Leorio yelling his head off behind me as I moon jumped this Exam.
Killua and Gon both turned to look at me when I arrived behind them.
"What was that all about?" the white-haired boy said with an eyebrow high in the sky.
"Nah, Gon's friends don't like me. Boohoo," I said, drying invisible tears off my cheeks.
"Huh?! Why's that?" Gon said, curiosity and disbelief in his voice.
"Eh. They don't like me holding on to this here briefcase. No Siree. Also, Kurapika saw me knock out a guy earlier, and he probably didn't like that. A guy in blue named Tonpa," I said as I settled into running beside Gon on his right.
"Why'd you do that?!" Gon said, surprised and anger coming from his voice.
I looked at the boy with confusion, "What? That guy was scum. He tried to poison me with a drink, fortunately, that trash compactor over there drank it instead," I finished with a point of my pinky finger to Killua. He glared.
"Really?!" Gon said as he stared up at the ceiling before realizing something, "Oh! That's why the drink he offered us tasted funny! Wow, what a dirty trick!"
I laughed as Gon furrowed his eyes, more annoyed at being tricked then at Tonpa himself. Killua looked at Gon, puzzled.
"You could taste the laxatives in the drink?"
Gon nodded as he smiled at Killua, "Uh-huh, I tried all types of herbs and plants on the mountain back home. I can usually taste when something's bad."
"Pfft. You're tasting all my food from now on," I said with a laugh.
Killua put a hand behind his head as he continued to run, "Man, you're really weird... I'm surprised you can keep up with me Gon," he turned to me and gave a dismissive look before turning forward, "And I'm surprised you're even keeping up with us."
"Maan fu-," my eyes exploded out of my eyes when I realized Gon was more of a child than Killua was. Even if they were both freaks of nature, "-udge you, er, kid."
Killua grinned at me while laughing with his body, while Gon looked confused.
I continued, "Regardless, I'm surprised too. I know how good Killua is, but you're really in shape Gon. Your not even sweating or anything!"
Gon gave a big ol' grin, "Thanks! I trained a lot for the Hunter Exam! I'd climb trees, pick up boulders, chase deer, and even wrestle Kon!"
Killua looked at Gon with an eyebrow raised, "Who's Kon?"
"He's the Foxbear I raised ever since I was little! He's the Lord of the Forest back home! I hope he's ok," Gon said with a smile and limitless enthusiasm.
Damn. A Foxbear's no joke. There were none at Mayer's house, just big ol' bears. But from my Master's explanation, Foxbears were ferocious things. They can take down trees in a single swipe. And Grizzly Adams over here tamed and wrestled one.
Killua nodded, "Hmm. Well, if the rest of these guys were like us, maybe this Hunter Exam would be a challenge. So far it's been boring," he finished by hanging his head.
I nodded my head, "I have to agree. I knew endurance would be part of the Hunter Exam, but this is below what I was prepared for."
"Hey, why do you two want to be Hunters, anyway?" Gon said as he turned his head back and forth to us.
Killua answered first, "Who me? I never said I wanted to be a Hunter. I just heard the Exam was supposed to be really hard. It sounded kind of fun so here I am. But it's not as fun as I thought."
Gon turned to me, "What about you, Mr. James?"
I could see Killua's perk up. I never told him why I wanted to be a Hunter.
"Well, for two reasons. And just call me James, Gon. You're a lot more polite than that brat over there. Killua, take note! Gon, that kid has no manners. I swear, he was raised by monkeys," I said with a grin.
I could see Killua glare at me from the corners of my eye, his eyebrows twitching as he held his tongue. How cute, he wanted to leave a good impression on Gon.
D'aw, how adorable. I would enjoy messing with Killua until he got comfortable around Gon to show his true dickish ways. It wouldn't last, but I was going to milk it for all its worth. Hehehe...
Gon laughed half-heartedly as he rubbed the back of his head with his left hand. He had the good sense not to do anything more than that.
"Hehehe, anyways..." the cover story uploaded to my head flowed out of my mouth smoothly, mostly because it wasn't a lie, "I have to take the Hunter Exam. I'm part of a Mafia family, and the leaders are all required to have Hunter Licenses. It's a useful way to avoid prosecution for a lot of crimes, as well as have access to more resources..."
I sighed before continuing, "I don't want to be part of the Mafia, though. I want to be a Hunter to have absolute freedom. To do what I want and explore this crazy world at my leisure..."
I remembered what I saw on top of the Elder Weiss as I stared off into the horizon. My hand tightened around my sword handle as I thought of all I could do. An endless amount of possibilities... infinite potential... endless adventure...
But I had to finish my mission with Evira first...
Killua stared up at the ceiling, "I never really thought of it like that..."
Gon nodded, "Yeah! That does sound fun!"
"Yeah, don't it?! I'm happy I'm not the only one who thinks like that! I don't have a huge dream or anything, but it is what is," I said with a smile.
Gon shook his head, "No, that sounds great! As for me, my dad's a Hunter. So, I decided I was going to be a Hunter just like him, no matter what!"
Killua nodded, "Hm, so what kind of Hunter is he?"
"No idea!" Gon said
Killua looked at Gon confusion before he turned away and laughed, "It's the weirdest thing I've ever heard. You want to be the same kind of Hunter as your dad, but you don't know anything about him? That's nuts."
I looked at Killua, taken aback, "Maybe he doesn't know his dad or something."
Gon nodded, "James' right, I don't! Mito's the one who raised me and she told me a little, but I've only ever seen him in pictures she's showed me from a long time ago."
"Now, don't you feel bad Cottonball?" I said with a shake of my head.
"Shut up Cherryhead!" Killua said explosively, tired of taking my shit.
Damn it! That was too short of a time! There was almost no milking!
I frowned as I took a second to actually mull over the insult... That actually hurt my widdle feelins... My hair was not that red...
Gon laughed, "It's alright. My aunt Mito raised me. She's awesome! She said that my dad took the Hunter Exam when she was only twelve years old, too. He passed on his first try and became a Hunter. That's when he decided to leave the island."
Gon stared up the tunnel, sunlight shining through as the exit finally reared its beautiful fucking head. His eyes were full of happiness and excitement, brighter than even the light outside. Not a trace of hate or anger in him, "So, I came here in order to find out why he chose being a Hunter over staying at home with me."
I looked at the kid with respect, not sadness his words would normally elicit. It was a different type of respect than I had with Killua. Whereas Killua was far more intelligent, mature (somewhat), and skilled than I was; Gon was like a shining beacon of positivity. I was right, it was just like being around my dad. Except he was a little kid and what not.
Still. I hoped I could be even a fraction of accepting and good-natured as this kid. There was a type of wisdom to that. Where others would scorn that type of optimist as being pointless, or the kid as being too stupid, I'd say he was wiser than even most people.
Gon carried no hate, no malice, nothing. And with that emptiness, he could embody anything. Somehow, I think he understood that. Even if he didn't know it himself, his soul did somehow.
He didn't want for anything. He didn't need anything. He was as happy as he could possibly be... He had absolute peace of mind.
I mean, shit, ain't that what we're all looking for in life?
I shook my head and laughed, the fatigue that was bothering me this whole time temporarily gone for some reason.
I turned to the two and spoke, "You two are some strange kids. I like you two. I'll make sure you two pass this exam."
Gon shot out a thanks while Killua looked at me with disdain.
"Tch, who are you to talk? I'm the one who's going to make sure you pass!"
"Oh yeah? Well then, keep up," I said with a grin.
That's when I blasted off up the stairs. Without my weights, I was gliding up these steps like a speeding ghost. I could hear Killua and Gon yelp as I sped forward. Killua could disappear in the blink of an eye if he wanted to, but he wasn't. Not when making friends and pretending to be a somewhat normal kid. Hehehe.
I, on the other hand, was a dirty adult. I could do whatever I want. I also could run like a horse for hours.
If there was one thing I had in spades, it was endurance.
The other applicants flew passed by me, most of them bewildered at the pace I was going. That and I had a backpack, suitcase, and a stick like a crazy old businessman. This was dumb, but it felt good just letting go and blazing through the competition. I was probably going fifty kilometers, or about thirty-one miles, without a problem.
Fuck it, this will be my proclamation of war to all the other applicants...
Just as Satotz was turning around as he reached the top of the stairs, I sped past him and skidded to a stop. I turned around to see Gon and Killua fly past me as well, more than keeping up with me. I smiled quickly before my face reverted to a mask of calmness as I stared at the rest of the people coming up the stairs.
They were all looking at the three of us. Well, mostly me. Gon and Killua were arguing over who won. I wanted to smile like a maniac, high from the rush of dopamine surging into my head as I looked at the rest of my competition. Instead, I looked at them with narrow eyes and a stoic face.
My enemies.
All of them realized I was a threat now. If they hadn't before, they did now.
And I didn't care.
My actions had drawn a line on the ground for the rest of the competitors to see: if I had to fight every fucking person in the Hunter Exam to pass, I will. Even if I had to go against Pinhead and Hisoka to do it.
I died as nothing. And now I was going to live to have everything...
I felt a tug on my suit jacket from behind me. Breaking out of my thoughts and stare down with the examinees, I turned around and saw the two boys look at me.
"Hey James! Who won?!" the two boys said in unison.
Uhhh...
Fuck... I wasn't paying attention.
Author's Notes:
Hey all! Hope you are all well and continue to do well! Especially during these trying times.
If you're healthy, stay in and stay healthy! If you're not, I hope you recover quickly and without any issue! The same goes to any of your loved ones that are sick. If you're far beyond the date of 3/29/2020, then use this as a reference to how weird the early 2020's have been:
Tony Ferguson and Khabib Khabib Nurmagomedov will never fight. I guarantee it. The only way it happens if they fight in a giant, sterilized bubble. The GODS and reality itself don't want it to happen.
For those of you that want a funny story within a story, the two people I named are MMA fighters who's fight has been cancelled four time over five years. It's probably the most cursed fight in combat sports history. A fight half a decade in the making.
They're the best lightweights in the world and every time they tried to fight, some shit happens to stop it. Now that Tony is ranked #1 and the other has the belt; and both are on a twelve fight win streak... the WEEK their fight is announced the Coronavirus also announced. I shit you not. A literal global pandemic happens right when the fight is announced.
This, this is why I believe truth is stranger, and way funnier than fiction. I almost don't have to make up the shit I write.
A shout out and thank you to Enormtpucko, zackman2k12, Jacksonion Democracy, FranciscoToothy, I'm Da Bomb, Crocodile59, XorDart, Watermelonninja, Gtopia and our three guest reviewers: guest, guest and g...
greg. Yeah greg. Just greg.
*thecosmicrondo stares off screen* Nothing else? No? Seriously? Just greg? *he shrugs and scratches his he head, he reads his notecard again*
That's what it says on the review folks!
All joking aside, thank you all for your kind words and reviews! Even if some you never get this far to see my thanks, I'll always appreciate your reviews! If I left anyone out, tell me and I'll fix it.
And thank you all you wonderful people who have favorited and followed my story. You silent people are awesome! Stay sexy!
Oh, one last thing before I go! I think the greatest mystery in all of Hunter X Hunter, one that rivals even the Dark Continent itself is...
What the fuck is Beans? Is he literally a bean man, or a weird human who chooses to have a bean motif? If he is, why beans of all things?!
What the fuck...
I choose to believe he is literally a giant, walking bean. Because I believe in the glorious stupidity of it!
Until next time dear readers! Stay safe!
