I really hate Thanksgiving. Well, the food is pretty amazing, I absolutely love turkey. But the concept is horrible. So, we're saying a couple hundred years ago a bunch of native Americans got slaughtered and so now we should celebrate that and eat a bunch of food. Who thought that was a good concept for a holiday? It's not even just that. I hate the fact that I have to have two Thanksgivings with each set of parents and hear them each complain about my life choices and nitpick all of the little things I do wrong. It is an entire day of family, which I have no idea how anyone survives, and I had to do two of them!
Blue,
I think I made you uncomfortable, and I'm really, really sorry. I'm kind of a nosy person. It's always been a problem. I'm so sorry, Blue. I know I sound like a broken record. I don't know if I've mentioned this outright, but our emails are really important to me. I would never forgive myself if I fucked this up. Edded this up. Sorry, I don't even know if you cuss.
So, I might have given you the wrong idea with this subject line. I have to admit that I don't TECHNICALLY know whether Reese's are better than sex. Reese's are freaking incredible, don't get me wrong. And I'm guessing they're better than hetero sex, a.k.a. "intercourse" (per my mom).
Non-hetero sex, though? I imagine it may be a little better than Reese's. Is it weird that I can't talk about this without blushing?
Anyway, speaking of Reese's, thank you so much for the photo. That was exactly what I had in mind. Instead of actually eating on, I just wanted to IMAGINE how salty and chocolaty and awesome it would be to eat one. It's great because I really wanted to torture myself, but I didn't feel like making the adore to Google Reese's cups myself.
I would raid our own supply of leftover chocolate, but it didn't even come close to surviving the weekend.
-Jacques
Partying harder than Blue's mom since 2014.
Okay, okay so he has not had sex. For the first time in a few days, I can fully exhale again. I didn't even realize how much that has been bothering me. It feels like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. He has had past girlfriends, but he never actually did anything with them. I guess I'm not too far from where he is at. I love his sarcasm. I really love that he has a sarcastic side, like me. Just that one email has made me completely emotionally prepared for Thanksgiving dinner with my mom's family. I can survive a night of probing undifferentiating questions about my life from my relatives.
Jacques,
Don't worry, you haven't messed anything up. These emails have become like a lifeline to me. There is pretty much nothing that can change my mind about you. You don't have to say effed. I curse. Not that often, but whenever it is the right situation I guess.
So, I guess I'm not the only one whose parent tries to lecture them on sex. Every time I see my dad he always asks about my sex life (as if I had one). I've got to agree with you Reese's are pretty amazing and are defiantly than heterosexual sex (not like I would know either). I'm betting hetero sex is better than Reese's although. I have to admit, it is a relief to hear that though. For a solid day, I was stressing you were this huge player who had slept with all these women.
I guess I better start working to invent a way to send chocolate over email. Plus, that way I can also send Oreos. I just consumed an entire package of those Halloween Oreos. Dang those things are amazing.
~Blue
Just three hours. That's how ling dinner will last. I can survive that. Maybe.
My entire family is drunk, I'm the only one who is not at least 21, which means I am the only one that is not completely intoxicated. Having a bunch of drunk relatives ask you the same questions over and over is not my definition of fun. The only thing getting me through it is the thought of dinner. Although I hate the concept of Thanksgiving, and my family drives me up a wall, the food is pretty spectacular. Turkey is definitely in my top ten favorite foods. By the time dinner is over I have had to lie about my lack of having a girlfriend at least seven times. Family is exhausting! All I want to do is crash in my bed and sleep for like three days. Which is exactly my plan when I get home.
