Act 2, Chapter 3
At the Nefarious Space Station, Dr. Nefarious slouched at his desk while Lord Vorselon stood in front. Nefarious snapped, "What do you MEAN she escaped?!" His words slurred and his tone was shrill, "And she's with RATCHET now?! No word on Azimuth's whereabouts, either?!"
Vorselon shook his head, "Our troopers are searching for the Markazian cyborg and the lombaxes as we speak-" Vorselon couldn't help but notice Nefarious' head tilting from side to side. The robot scientist rested his chin on his hand to keep his head steady.
Nefarious let out a long growl before he slammed his fist onto the desk and shouted, "WHATEVER! I don't care anymore!" Nefarious' speech slurred even more, "All she does is find new ways to ruin her own life and drag everyone else down with her. Why would I want someone like that around here, anyway?! She did me a FAVOR by leaving the way she did!"
Vorselon tilted his head and squinted his eye at the scientist. "And, the Lombaxes... Sir?" He asked.
Nefarious broke eye contact and muttered incoherently. Vorselon glanced over to the coffee table to see opened bottles of whiskey. He looked back to Nefarious, awaiting a response. When the silence had drawn on for too long, Nefarious harshly gestured his hand towards Vorselon and grumbled, "Just get out and keep looking for those two." Vorselon teleported out of the room without another word.
Nefarious took a moment to sit in silence and stared down at his desk. All he could focus on were his own clouded, racing thoughts. He could barely remember the intimate night with Mina. Nefarious had a vague image of her silver metal finish and bright green optics. He more so recalled what was on his mind at the time rather than the events themselves. Mina's true robotic appearance was something Nefarious had never seen before. Not only because squishies-turned-robots were so rare, but because Mina looked almost uncanny to him. Uncanny in the most unique, enticing way.
All the things Mina said and the way she took charge and kissed him made Nefarious' sisterboard light up brighter than the entire star system. Out of every pior love interest of his, none had ever been so straightforward and to the point. Everything about Mina's fiery personality and the rarity of her appearance was so perfect. Nefarious couldn't resist her. He wanted her. He needed her. He had to have her.
But how shameful it was, to fall for someone who is friends with the enemy, someone who more often than not looks like a revolting squishy, someone who was supposed to be just another lowly employee. Mina was right when she asked if her being a squishy-turned-robot was one of the reasons why Nefarious hired her. He never would've dared to admit that, but perhaps he should have.
The morning after, Nefarious let his confusion, shame, and anger get the better of him. He couldn't help but wonder if his outburst drove Mina to take off from the space station without a single explanation. Then again, maybe she was just being selfish. She was, after all, betraying her friends by being there in the first place. Of course she would have the audacity to seduce someone just to steal from them and run away the next morning. Were her feelings real, or was it all a setup? Was she even clever enough to do that? Nefarious couldn't have known. The doctor cursed himself. What a fool.
Still, Nefarious felt warm and fuzzy at the thought of Mina's laughter and high energy. He growled and shook his head, repeating to himself, Why? Another minute passed, and he stood up to slowly walk over to his couch. Upon sitting down, Nefarious picked up another whiskey bottle to continue drinking.
Nefarious turned on his radio and flipped through the channels before he found an old jazz song. The tune started off slow and quiet, then quickly picked up the pace with increased volume. The song was unpredictable, obnoxious, yet had a sweet flow to it at the same time. Although there were no lyrics, this song somehow made Nefarious think of that Markazian cyborg he used to know.
Nefarious played the song on loop as he finished the last bottle, then opened another one. As Nefarious' next bottle was almost empty, he pulled out a blaster to shoot the radio, destroying it and cutting off the sound of the song.
With shaky hands, Nefarious lifted up the whiskey bottle to drink up even more. One swallow later, he felt his head get so dizzy and heavy that he passed out, spilling the drink onto the couch cushions.
Mina arrived at a ship parking garage just across the street of the location where the Smuggler suggested to meet. Before getting out of the ship, Mina checked her watch's storage for a more appropriate outfit. The majority of her clothing was old, baggy shirts with faded logos and jeans covered in stains which were definitely not date material. Eventually she was able to put together the most decent outfit she could; A light brown, faux leather jacket with a pink tank top underneath, and skinny jeans with brightly colored high heeled ankle boots.
Mina shook her fingers through her fluffy hair before she left her ship to walk across the street. The date location appeared to be some kind of outdoor bar at the very top of a large building. As she walked in and headed up a spiral staircase, Mina felt tightness in her chest and knots in her stomach. Out of every date she had ever been on, Mina never went out with such a man in such a setting. The Smuggler is much different from any man Mina had ever been with, and this date was much better planned out than the date (if she could even call it that) she had with Nefarious.
Mina climbed the stairs and made it to the top of the building, where the bar was. She turned another corner to see the back of the Smuggler, who was about to walk into the restaurant. His back faced Mina until he could hear her presence and turned around to meet her gaze. The man wore dark grey pants with a tucked in, blue button-up shirt with a few buttons undone at the top. He was still wearing his hat, and his bird was nowhere in sight. Mina's chest got even tighter and she reluctantly put one foot back for a second before she decided to walk forward.
The Smuggler smiled down at Mina as he noticed just how cautiously she approached him. Mina gestured her hands up and down her body, "How do I look?" She asked.
"You look good." The Smuggler responded.
"So do you."
The man put his hands on his hips as he scanned Mina, "You nervous?"
Mina realized her hands were shaking and she put them in her pockets, "Yeah. A little bit". She answered.
"Never been on a date before?"
"Oh, no. Lots- I mean, I've never had a 'normal' date like this before."
"Heh. You got nothin' to worry about." The Smuggler assured, "C'mon."
The Smuggler held the door open for Mina to allow her through first. She looked up at the Smuggler and stared into his one eye, paused for a second, then tilted her head, "Wasn't your eyepatch on your other eye?" She asked.
"What?"
"... Never mind."
Mina shrugged off the interaction and walked through the open door. The dining area was a very large balcony with ivy plants surrounding the concrete edges. The whole balcony provided a perfect view of the rest of Axiom City. On each corner of the balcony, there were speakers that played music through a radio. The Terachnoid servers gave funny looks to the couple, but shrugged it off and went back to their jobs without making any side comments. Mina's date gestured to the tables, allowing her to choose where they should sit. She chose the table at the very back corner.
As the couple sat down, Mina adjusted the table cloth before she turned her neck to look around and noticed the lack of other patrons, "I'd expect a place like this to be super busy." She said, "You didn't reserve the whole place for us, did you?"
"I can neither confirm nor deny that." The Smuggler answered.
Mina tilted her face away to hide her smile. After she relaxed her expression, the man spoke again, "So, you're all robotic, huh?"
Mina let out a quiet huff, "How did I know that was gonna be our first subject?"
The Smuggler held out his hand then scratched his neck, "Apologies for the invasive question. I understand that ya must be very private with that sorta thing."
"No, no. Not at all. Yes, I'm one-hundred percent robot. But I wasn't born like that."
"You from Planet Markazia, then?"
"I'm from the Bogon Galaxy, actually." Mina fidgeted in her seat before sitting back up with her hands folded, "My parents moved there a few months before I was born, right after they got out of high school."
"Teenagers...?"
"They had a very productive prom night, yes. Anyway, they had my sister and my brother later. After I graduated high school myself I worked as an engineer at Megacorp- Never work there, by the way. They suck. A while after that, our house caught fire, and a ceiling fell on top of me. I was burned so bad I should've died. Then these doctors had the crazy idea to transfer my subconscious into a robot body and well, here I am."
"Ya worked with machines just to become one yourself. Hehe, tragic and ironic."
"No kidding."
"They gave ya a perfect hologuise, too. Ah, wait- We discussed this. It ain't a hologuise, hmm?" The Smuggler traced his finger over Mina's watch, "So, what is it, anyway?"
"Oh, it's actually a-" Mina's cheeks flushed before she moved her arm away from the Smuggler's touch, "Hey I kind of feel like I'm being interviewed right now. I know I'm super interesting, but I'm super interested in you, too."
The Smuggler smiled and sat back, "Alright," he said, "Whaddya wanna know?"
"Well, first of all, I wanna know what made you choose this kind of lifestyle. What happened to you, anyway? What pushed you to pursue a life of crime?"
"Nothin' 'happened' to me. In case ya didn't notice, ya need an awful lotta bolts in order to just live your life."
"Trust me, I've noticed."
"There wasn't much else for me to do with myself. Never learned well in classroom settings or anythin' of the sort. I learned everything I know from traveling the galaxy and picking up whatever weapons 'n gadgets I could find. Sell em, trade em, you name it. Huntin' Leviathans to sell their souls, too. I realized that was the better way to navigate life. Especially with Tachyon oppressin' the galaxy and whatnot."
Mina flipped her bangs and gritted her teeth. She didn't need the reminder of how she and her friends got stranded in this galaxy. "I can imagine. How long were you on the run from his imperial spies?"
"Too damn long."
"Yeah… Ratchet and Clank and I spent so long chasing after that stupid bug. The whole situation came out of nowhere for us. It was crazy."
"How'd y'all end up in this galaxy, anyway?"
"It's a very funny story, actually." Mina crossed her legs and gestured with her hand, "So I used to work for my friend, Al at his RoboShack in Solana. One day, Ratchet texted me to tell me he crashed his hoverbike and needed my help fixing it. I told Al, 'Hey I'm gonna go help Ratchet with his hoverbike. You won't even notice I'm gone; I'll be back in thirty minutes'. Tachyon showed up, we stole his ship, it knocked us out before shifting into autopilot. Next thing we knew, we were in another galaxy, and then, yeah… That 'thirty minutes' lasted over a year."
"Heh. Ya really got yourselves wrapped up in a hellish situation, hmm?"
"You have no idea."
A long-faced Terachnoid server approached the table with a pen and paper in his hand. "Alright," he sighed, "So what'll it be?"
"Oh-" The Smuggler broke his focus on Mina to read off of the menu, "I'll just have the usual."
Mina cocked her head, "You come here so often you have a usual order?"
"No. That's literally what the drink is called." The Smuggler pointed to the menu item; it was a tall glass of a whiskey mix with a lemon slice.
Oh. "I'll just have, uhh, some red wine..." Mina said. Her voice began to stutter, "I-In the smallest glass you have. Please."
The Smuggler pondered, "That's all ya want?"
"I really shouldn't drink too much on a first date. Not after what happened last time."
"'Last time'? Do I wanna know?"
"No, you do not."
The Terachnoid server groaned in response as he wrote down the orders. Mina glanced at her date then back at the server and whispered, "Psst… Sorry for bringing a wanted criminal into your establishment."
The server finished writing and turned away without looking at Mina, "I don't get paid enough to care." He walked off.
Mina raised her eyebrows then turned back to her date. "So, uhh-" she stumbled over her words before finding the right way to form a question, "Running black market trades with Tachyon in power… That couldn't have been easy. How did you manage to pull off so many schemes?"
The Smuggler stretched his arms behind his back, "Well, I can't say it was ever easy." He chuckled, "I know I make it look easy, but it's really about carefully comin' up with a steady plan, then a backup plan, then even more backup plans. Havin' a companion or two helps."
"I know I always did my best work when I was with Al and Ratchet and Clank." Mina shrugged and stared down at the table, "Sometimes I wonder what I'd ever do without them."
"Heh. It's nice to have good folks around ya, ain't it? No one likes to be alone."
"Except you."
"I'm not alone."
"Right, right. You have your bird. How did you two meet, anyway?"
"It's a very funny story. So, years ago I played a game of Blargian Roulette with a pirate named Slag. Know of him?"
"Unfortunately, yes."
"He bet on his pet bird and I bet on my one good eye."
Mina squinted at the Smuggler's 'one good eye' that she could've sworn was the other one.
The man continued, "By some miracle, I won the game and got to keep my eye and the parrot. Now we travel the galaxy together and split our shares."
"Aw, nice… Wait, what does a bird need bolts for, anyway?"
"Bird stuff."
The Terachnoid server returned to the table and placed down the drinks, as well as a glass of ice water for each. Without giving a single glance to either party, he turned away and muttered, "Enjoy your drinks, you suspicious-looking couple."
Mina immediately took a large sip of her wine while her gaze focused on her date. The Smuggler seemingly wasn't aware of Mina's stare as he drank down the lemon whiskey. The all-too-familiar scent was strong enough to make Mina's hair curl and spine tingle. She could feel her entire body warming up, especially in her face. The moment she realized her cheeks were burning, she gulped down the ice water.
Mina felt the water go down the wrong pipe (literally) and was ready to start choking. She noticed the Smuggler made eye contact with her and managed to keep her cool, swallowing again to avoid choking. Her sweaty brow made the situation obvious to the man, however. Before either party could speak, the music on the nearby radio cut to a commercial advertising the next Lance and Janice episode.
Mina smiled and hummed, "Lance and Janice…"
"You watch that soap opera?" The Smuggler asked.
"I didn't, but then I started liking it after watching it with my ex boyfriend-" Mina cut herself off and yelled at herself in her head, Ex boss! Ex BOSS!
"Ex, huh?"
Mina cleared her throat then spoke at a higher pitch, "So, out of all the places you've been in Polaris, where do you see the most action?"
The Smuggler hesitated before he answered the question, "Can't say." He took another sip of his drink, "The whole galaxy is an intense, crime ridden land. Even after Tachyon's defeat. Hell, I think that actually helped boost business! My kinda business, of course."
Mina pretended to drink from her wine glass and swallowed. She cleared her throat, "I think I'd do much better in a business like yours," she said, "After all, it's nearly impossible for me to get injured or die. It's one of the many perks of being a robot."
The man set down his glass just hard enough to make a loud clink sound. "Now here's somethin' I'm curious about with you…"
Mina's ears twitched, "Oh?"
"Why cover up all the 'perks'? You were lucky to get outta that fire alive. Why not embrace your new and improved form? Sure, the initial shock of the big change must've been hard. But it's been several years and I figured you'd be used to it by now. So, why cover yourself up?"
"Well… I guess I- I never really thought much about that."
Before the conversation could continue, Mina's watch lit up. She looked down to see it was an incoming call from Ratchet. Mina pushed her chair out and got up quickly, "It's Ratchet." She told her date, "I'm really sorry but I gotta take this."
Mina rushed into the restrooms and locked the door behind her. The single-person restroom had cracks on the floors and cobwebs stringing under the flickering lights. Mina scoffed and put her back up against the wall before answering her communicator.
Before Mina could say 'hello', Ratchet shouted on the other end, "Mina! I found Alister Azimuth and get this; He knew my father! They were lifelong best friends!"
Mina's smile stretched wide, "Really?! Ratchet, that's awesome!"
"He gave me my father's hoverboots and even taught me how to use them!"
"You better be planning on sharing those with me. I've wanted a pair my whole life."
"No way. You're not touching these unless I need help fixing them. Oh, congrats on winning a round at the Battleplex."
"You know about that?"
"Yep. It's all over the radio."
"Greaaat… Speaking of the Battleplex, Qwark is still there and I told him I'd tell you to rescue him from the bloodthirsty Agorians."
"Is there any reason as to why you couldn't get him out of there yourself?"
"Yes. I was, uhh… Making plans with someone… In fact I'm with them right now-"
"You're on a date, aren't you?"
"Maybe." Mina chuckled and flipped her bangs out of her eyes. "Listen, this guy's a real good one; Smart, well-spoken, super polite... Kinda awkward but hey, at least he didn't bring his parrot."
"Parrot…?" Ratchet paused before he continued, "Oh, no. No, no no, Mina… Don't tell me…"
Mina held in a laugh.
The lombax groaned in disappointment, "You're dating that sleazy smuggler?! Seriously?"
"You'll never believe it, Ratchet. He admitted he had a crush on me after I punched him in the crotch and then he took us out for drinks. I think I'm in love."
"Ugh, please. You're only dating him because he's rich."
"That's not true."
"Oh, yeah? What's his name, then?"
Mina fell silent as her eyes darted around the room while she tried to come up with a clever response. "Hmm… I guess that is important when dating someone." She giggled nervously, "Okay, in all fairness, I didn't know the real first name of my last date, either."
Ratchet huffed, "Uh-huh. And the date before that?"
"Actually, I think that one's name was Silas."
"You are so screwed up."
Mina shrugged and smiled, amused by her friend's reaction. Ratchet rubbed his temples and let out a long, irritated sigh. He had known Mina long enough that at that point, he knew he should've gotten used to her nonsense. And for a while, he was. Ratchet used to be entertained by Mina's antics but as time went on, he grew tired of hearing about her increasingly terrible decisions. Especially when much more important tasks were at hand.
Ratchet thought about how Clank would handle this situation. The lombax relaxed his posture while shoving aside his irritation. "Listen, Mina," Ratchet said in a slightly deeper, slowed down tone, "I don't know how to talk to you about this, but I think you seriously need to rethink your life."
Mina's pride drained out of her body at Ratchet's words. "Whaddya mean?"
"Where do I start? For one thing, you're dating a criminal for his bolts while I'm looking for Clank."
"Hey, he's a decent guy and he can probably help me pay off my debt. Remember I'm up to my eyes in debt? I've got my own problems."
"Yeah, you've got problems alright."
Mina glared at her communicator and suddenly got the urge to smack her friend. Lucky for him, he was hours away from her.
Ratchet sighed, "I get that you have your own issues, Mina. I'll respect you for prioritizing paying off your debt, just don't forget about me and Clank, okay?"
"How could I ever forget about you two? You're both my best friends and I'm so lucky to have you guys in my life. You're very important to me."
"That's almost exactly what Clank said about you."
Mina's heart sank and ears dropped, "He… He really said that to you? About me?"
"Yeah. Yeah, he did. Not long before the Zoni took him away."
Mina remembered that moment clearly. Even though it didn't cross her mind for a while, she could remember it as if it had just happened. Mina could never forget the helpless cries she heard from her two dear friends as they were forcibly separated. And she could never forget the time spent with just her and Clank a few days before Tachyon's defeat. The surrounding noise in the restroom began to fade as Mina's ears rang as she reminisced.
Mina's trance was interrupted by Ratchet's voice, "Anyway, in a few hours I'll be in Axiom City to find an obsidian eye at Pollyx Industries-"
The young woman snapped out of her dazed mind and gleefully called out, "Oh! I'm right outside of Axiom City!" Mina adjusted her jacket and stood up from the wall, preparing to walk out of the restroom, "How about I meet you halfway? I just gotta tell this guy that you need me and-"
"No, no. That's okay, really."
Mina fell back against the wall and started to feel a lump in her throat. "Huh? Really?" She asked.
"I've got General Azimuth with me. We can handle this on our own."
"... Okay."
"Call me if you need anything. Enjoy your date, Mina." Ratchet hung up before allowing Mina to give one final response.
Mina's back slid down against the wall until she sat on the dirty floor. She could feel her heart beating in her ears and the lump in her throat felt so big she wanted to gag. Ratchet's words kept on repeating in her mind as she simultaneously thought about her last moments with Clank. Mina squeezed her eyes shut as the vivid memories rushed back to her . . .
