I'm sorry guys. I never make you guys wait this long for an update. I'm currently going through extensive therapy for my depression and anxiety, and it's taking me a bit to get back on track but I'm surely getting there. I promise.
Also, I'll apologize in advance for Nino and Alya's baby name simply because I'm trash and I'm not creative. I decided to name her after one of my readers who had a beautiful name and I liked it, so I decided to name the baby that.
To that reader, you'll know who you are soon and I'm sorry I butchered your name. I just loved it so much.
Please enjoy!
Marinette found herself pacing back and forth.
The only things she could visualize and hear were the sounds of Alya attempting to calm her breathing. Marinette knew her friend was lucky enough to get an epidural, but the pain she was starting to feel before that had become evident by the way she screamed.
Marinette wanted to be in the delivery room so badly, but the doctors and nurses were being stubborn to only allow one person inside.
The young woman didn't take offense to it - if her best friend wanted the father of her baby to be in the delivery room with her, then who was she to oblige?
Marinette knew that if she were in that situation, she'd want her baby's father to be there too.
It was Alya and Nino's first child, despite Nino's fear of watching childbirth, he needed to be there to experience the birth of his firstborn child.
It had been several hours since Alya had moved from the delivery room down to the maternity room and Marinette couldn't wait to see the little one.
She didn't even know what name they picked out or if it was a boy or girl. The questions that ran through her mind only made her grow more and more antsy.
Marinette paused, her blue eyes moving up the moment Nino began to walk down the hallway. There was a palish green look to his face, that told Marinette he had witnessed his greatest fear, but as callous as it sounded, she couldn't care less about Nino's illness. All she wanted was to see the baby.
"Nino!" Marinette exclaimed, immediately running towards him with her purse clutched in her hands. "How'd it go?! Is Alya okay? How's the baby?"
Nino offered her a weak smile, the struggle to keep his equilibrium evident on his facial features.
"Yeah, Alya is fine. The baby is fine. The birth went according to plan and we are both happy to introduce the baby to you," Nino explained, his brown eyes trained on Marinette as she struggled to contain her excitement.
Marinette grinned, her hands clutching against her purse as she excitedly bounced on her toes.
"Can I meet the baby? Please take me to the baby! I don't think I can wait another minute!" Marinette piped, her heart racing in her chest as Nino simply chuckled off her childish excitement.
"Alright!" Nino rasped, the concept of being a father still not completely sinking in just yet. He casually slipped his hands into his pockets and shifted his weight. "Come with me."
Marinette drew out a deep breath. She could almost hear her own heart hammering away relentlessly between her ears.
The area was warm, and Marinette could see her best friend laying beneath a dull light. Alya glanced down at a bundle of blankets she held in her arms tautly.
Granted, it was expected that Alya wouldn't look her best. She wasn't wearing her glasses, and her hair was tied up into a messy bun that was about ready to come undone off the side of her head.
Alya glanced up at Marinette as the young woman hesitantly approached the side of the bed. Nino followed Marinette close behind before he carefully closed the door behind him.
"Marinette?" Alya mused, quickly looking down at the small baby in her arms. "I'd like you to meet our new daughter, Taliah..."
Marinette gasped, her heart squeezing in her chest the moment Alya introduced her and Nino's new daughter.
She was finally an auntie! Marinette had a niece! The thought was incredibly riveting.
The young woman peered over, her blue eyes landing on a beautiful small baby who nuzzled into the pink soft blanket.
Marinette widened her eyes, her heart jumping in her chest the moment she heard the small coo of the baby. Taliah squirmed within her mother's arms, the small child yawned, balling her small fists and rubbing her cheeks delicately before relaxing into the blanket once more.
"Alya, she's absolutely beautiful!" Marinette breathed, reaching over to brush her fingertips across the child's soft hair.
Nino smiled, sitting on the edge of the hospital bed and watching the two women who admired the newborn.
"Thank you," Alya murmured, biting her lip while she brushed her fingertip over Taliah's cheek. "I can't believe I finally met my little munchkin. I'm a mother now..."
Marinette smiled, cocking her head to the side with a soft hum.
"She's got Nino's head," Marinette giggled, leaning against the bed as Taliah opened her mouth, looking for something to latch on to.
"I hope it wasn't too much trouble to push that out. I'm sure Nino was mentally preparing himself to see his head shape come out of you after all the videos he's watched and showed Adrien."
Nino rolled his eyes playfully, standing up and away from the bed with crossed arms.
"You know I'm still standing here, right?"
Marinette reached up, tugging her bottom lid and sticking her tongue out in successful attempt to mock him.
"I had the epidural," Alya replied, nuzzling into her baby, "So she was easy as pie. I'm not saying I want to do this again, but I'm incredibly tired."
Marinette released her eyelid, watching as Nino moved next to Alya and carefully wrapped his arm around her shoulder. Both new parents glanced down at their baby in awe.
Marinette stepped away, her blue eyes lowering. It was truly a beautiful sight, and Marinette knew she should be happy for her friends, but she couldn't help but to feel a little hurt.
She had always dreamed about something like this. In fact, she had once dreamed about this with Felix and then when she had fallen for Adrien, she indulged herself into thoughts of having children with him.
Alya and Nino truly did love one another and it shattered Marinette's heart into several pieces that she ruined that for herself.
She wasn't sure what had happened between Adrien and Kagami, but the more Marinette thought about it, the more she was afraid of his answer. She didn't want to believe that Adrien was that sort of person, but there was nothing else she could go on. The whole situation just looked really bad.
There was a twinge in her stomach, and Marinette pressed her lips together, her anxiety bubbling overwhelmingly within her stomach.
She was sure she was about to vomit.
Marinette reached up, running a finger through her bangs with a nervous glance.
"I think I had bad coffee..." she breathed, drawing the attention of both Nino and Alya who glanced away from their baby to offer Marinette an expression of concern.
"Are you alright? Do you need me to grab you some water?" Nino offered, carefully leveraging himself off the bed.
Marinette politely declined, her cheeks warming up as her stomach began to turn. She was feeling warmer than usual, and Marinette was worried she'd succumb to syncope by the way the walls seemed to close in on her.
"I-I'm gonna go outside and grab some fresh air. I'll be right back," Marinette sputtered, moving her eyes to Alya who examined Marinette with the utmost concern.
"O-Oh. Okay," Alya breathed, shifting her baby from one arm to the other. "If you need anything, please don't hesitate to call Nino or myself. We are incredibly worried about you."
Marinette felt her heart sink, guilt completely enveloping her as she didn't want her friends to worry about her. She had caused enough problems in her lifetime.
"Don't you guys worry about me," Marinette assured, awkwardly picking up her purse and walking towards the door. "I'm just...a little thirsty is all. Some water and fresh air will do fine. I promise I'll be right back. You know I'd text you guys if anything was wrong..."
Marinette turned, her heart thumping in her ears as she tried her very best not to cry.
She simply hated her brain.
Marinette stepped out into the cold open air. She could barely hear the slider doors from the hospital opening and closing rapidly from guests and employees.
She finally had an open space and Marinette didn't feel so trapped.
She was truly happy for Alya and she finally had the niece she's always wanted. There was a small bundle of joy waiting just a few floors up to receive love and complete suffocation of smooches from Marinette, yet here she was again, wallowing in her own self-pity.
She hated the way her brain was wired, and despite everything she should have been grateful for, Marinette couldn't stop thinking.
All she needed was silence.
The young woman closed her eyes, parting her lips as she drew in a deep breath. The air around her became still and for a brief moment, Marinette was sure she was able to finally calm herself down.
Perhaps her initial thoughts of fresh air and some water would be proved right after all. At least then, she'd be able to return upstairs and properly get to know Alya and Nino's new daughter.
Marinette exhaled, her shoulders slumping forward as the cool breeze brushed against her cheeks and blew through her hair in one swift motion.
It actually felt nice. Marinette wasn't sure when the last time she felt this good was, and it was perhaps sometime in the summer when her and Adrien would stand out in the garden and watch the sunset.
Marinette pressed her lips together, quickly willing away those thoughts between her and Adrien knowing full well that she'd throw herself right back where she started if she did something like that.
Marinette exhaled, silence enveloping her once more. At least she was able to stop thinking for once in a few years.
"Do you really see the worst in me? Or were you looking for an excuse to push me away?"
Marinette froze, her heart catching into her throat at the sound of his voice. It had been so long since she had last heard from him, and even the mere sound of his voice almost made her fall to the ground like a container of silly putty.
She widened her eyes, feeling his presence behind her, but Marinette knew she couldn't look at him. Marinette knew that if she did look at him, it would only take her seconds to end up in his arms and it would only make the realisation of how much she missed him so much stronger.
Adrien stood beside Marinette, the lines beneath his eyes deepening as he casually slipped his hands into the pockets of his black jacket with a frown on his lips.
"Do you really think that lowly of me?" Adrien asked, his voice low as he remained still beside her.
Marinette was completely at a loss for words, her heart only thumping wildly within the confines of her chest. She could clearly feel his eyes on her, but Marinette had no other place to turn to.
"What are you doing here?" Marinette asked, her voice quivering as her hands clenched anxiously at her side.
Adrien sighed, quickly glancing away as he shifted his weight from one leg to another.
"Did you forget that Nino's my friend too? The baby is apart of my life as well," he explained, keeping his voice calm while Marinette shuffled anxiously into her pockets.
Of course Nino would invite his best friend to see his newborn child. Why didn't Marinette think of that before? In fact, she should have seen it coming. She pressed her lips together, cursing herself as she left herself vulnerable to Adrien once more.
Marinette felt her limbs grow warm, and she was about ready to do what she was only good at.
Something she annoyingly did from the very beginning.
"I...I have to go," Marinette breathed, her chest growing tight as she was just about ready to step off the curb and make a run for it.
Her blue eyes widened the moment Adrien obdurately stepped in front of her and she could have fallen to her knees.
Marinette was always taken by the beauty of his face, but his eyes and his voice felt like home.
It felt as if she had been away for such a long time, and just the mere look of Adrien's face reminded her of where she once felt safe and warm.
His green eyes captured hers, and Marinette pressed her lips together.
He looked so tired.
She did this to him.
Her blue eyes lowered down to the pulse of his neck, and she admired the way his black shirt layered gently against the skin around his clavicle.
He looked a little paler than usual, and Marinette wondered if he was about ready to catch the flu - it was that season after all. She knew before she left that Nathalie and Gabriel had worked him to the bone, and she knew without a doubt that he was exhausted. She could only wonder what her escapades had been doing to him mentally.
She certainly wasn't making anything better.
"Don't you think I deserve a modicum of respect from you? After everything we've been through, don't I deserve a chance to be heard? I followed your schedule around for months, going to every place I knew you'd possibly be just to get a chance to talk to you. Your voicemail box is full, I couldn't get through to you by calling, you won't answer any of my text messages, I can never find you at your parents house. It really hurts that you'd go through drastic lengths to avoid me. I'm not letting you go anywhere until you give me a chance to talk," Adrien explained, his voice strained as he kept his eyes on her.
Marinette's lips quivered and all she wanted to do want mentally kick herself for being so stupid.
"Why? Why put yourself through all of this for a passing feeling, Adrien?" Marinette retorted. "Stop wasting your time. You know we've been through a lot and I've not been perfect. I did horrible things... I know I shouldn't be here..."
"A passing feeling?" Adrien interjected, his brow furrowing as the offense was evident in the sound of his voice. "If this was a passing feeling, I wouldn't be here right now trying to reason with you. Yes, we've had our ups and down but we're passionate. Marinette, I wouldn't be this distraught if I didn't love you. I haven't felt this empty since I lost my mom. I know for a fact that what I feel for you is love."
Marinette widened her eyes, her heart squeezing in her chest as his words rung her ears like clumsy church bells.
She had recalled so many times that Adrien mentioned he had feelings for her, but she didn't actually remember him saying that he loved her.
She remembered how much pain he was in after learning about Kagami's infidelity, but she didn't actually hear him compare the loss of her to the loss of his mother.
Marinette felt incredibly guilty and selfish for inflicting that kind of pain on him.
She didn't mean to run away, but every time her anxiety got the best of her, she always felt it was better to remove herself from the picture. She always thought that if they separated, it would somehow be better for the both of them. It would hurt now, but surely it would be a better choice in the end.
"Y-You love me?" Marinette asked, her voice drawing out in a breath as she was completely blindsided by the confession. A deep blush rose to her cheeks and Marinette reached up to rub her cheeks.
She had never felt so purblind.
She wondered who else noticed it.
"You've got to be joking with me. After everything we've been through, you're telling me that you couldn't see that?" Adrien asked, frustration laced into his voice. "We wouldn't be standing here if it weren't true. Even you know that. Otherwise you would have divorced me at this point. What happened between Kagami and I isn't what you thought, and I know you saw what had happened. You're quick to run away before we could see through things and you never give me the chance to speak for myself even after patiently waiting through everything that had happened between us. It really hurts to know that you don't trust me, or you think I'm that sort of person."
Marinette pressed her lips together. She reached up to tuck some loose hair behind her ear and she looked away.
He was right. He was absolutely right.
Adrien had every reason to feel frustrated and upset. She didn't give him a chance to get a word in edgewise after what she had seen. She knew what Kagami was like - Marinette had seen it first hand.
After what Luka told her, and after how Kagami treated her while she was with him only proved that Kagami did things that were unfathomable.
Adrien wouldn't trust her, and he never did really keep tabs on her after he had discovered what she had been doing this whole time.
Perhaps Marinette was looking for an excuse to run away again, because after her relationship with Felix, it seemed inconceivable for someone like Adrien to actually love her.
It simply didn't make sense for someone like Adrien to love a person like her.
The mere thought of it made her sick to her stomach.
"Alright," she breathed, glancing up at him, her legs feeling weak. "I'll give you a chance to talk about it. I'll let you explain your side of the story and your accounts of what actually happened that night."
Adrien widened his eyes, his lips parting almost as if he were about to immediately get into what he wanted to say but paused the moment Marinette held up her index finger to stop him right in his tracks.
"But," she continued, "We can't do it here. It'll have to be another time when we are alone. Nino called you to see their baby, that's what you should be here to do. I'm sure they're waiting right now, and you shouldn't be too long. I want every detail, I want to know everything that happened. I know going back to that night might upset you, and we should be happy during this time. It'll get us both worked up." Marinette glanced down for a brief moment, her belly quivering as she simply just wanted to hunch over and throw up, but she was holding her own just barely.
Adrien relaxed, his face remaining completely impassive as his hands remained in his pockets. He subtly nodded, not uttering a word as his breath simply drew out a fog. A glow enveloped them the moment a car passed the street, but afterwards, it had left them in darkness.
"I'll tell Alya I'll be back tomorrow. I'll bring some cookies from the bakery to make up for being a shitty friend but we can't go up there together. They know what had happened between us so it'll be way too awkward for us both to go up there," Marinette explained, running her fingertips through her bangs with a grimace.
"Are you going to at least answer my text messages then?" Adrien asked, perking a brow as he shifted his weight impatiently. It had been three months that he was made silent, he couldn't stand waiting another minute to finally explain himself. "I want to properly set up a time that we are both free so we can properly talk about this. I want to honor your request and go through all the details."
Marinette glanced down, suddenly feeling small by her nearsightedness. She nodded, keeping her eyes away from him for a brief moment before she finally looked up at him one last time.
Adrien glanced away, just as she looked up.
There was an awkward silence between the two of them and Marinette was sure she would burn into a liquid that would somehow drain into the sewer where she belonged.
"If you go back on your word..." Adrien drew out, his voice remaining calm as he kept his gaze trained away from his wife. "You know how insatiable I can be."
Marinette couldn't help but smile. Her heart quickened in her chest as she recalled how playful he used to be when it came to his stubbornness. She almost expected a smile to form on his lips but it never came.
"The moment you start ignoring my messages again..." Adrien murmured, slowly turning his green eyes to glance at her face once more.
"I'll come find you..."
