A/N: It's 12:34 in the morning. I shouldn't be writing this. I should probably be sleeping. My mind is stilled plagued with Wally/Bart father/son relations though, so I've decided if I ever feel like dabbling with that then I'll add it to this fanfiction that's already done. If there are specific scenes you want then lemme know!
Toe Socks
Third Person POV
"Hey Dad?"
A sigh could be heard from the couch. "Yeah, son?"
Bart appeared from around the corner, a frown etched across his features. "Why do socks and shoes exist?"
Wally blinked a few times with a raised eyebrow before letting out a long breath, returning his attention to his phone. "So our feet don't burn."
"But we used padding back in the future," the brunette commented. "That worked fine, so why confine our feet? Don't our pinky toes help us balance?"
"Flip flops exist too, Bart. You don't have to wear tennis shoes."
"Okay, but what about socks? They make my feet all sweaty and gross and it's cold here so walking without something covering my toes makes them cold."
The redhead lulled his head to the side, giving the younger speedster a deadpanned look. "Then get some toe socks."
"...what?"
"Toe socks," the twenty two year old said as he pointed at his own feet. Bart sped over, hazel eyes wide in shock at the individual sockets of white cloth for each digit. "They keep my toes warm but don't let my feet get sweaty. Plus I can move 'em better."
"They look like gloves but for feet," the fourteen year old commented as he grabbed Wally's second toe and wriggled it between his index and thumb.
Wally scrunched his toes up with a frown. "Stop that. And yeah, I guess so."
"...can I try them?"
A disgruntled expression crossed the ginger's face. "No. These are mine. Go get your own."
Bart pouted but nodded. "Fine!" He ran out of the room only to come back in with a sheepish expression. "Uh, where do I get toe socks?"
Wally sighed for what must've been the fifth time within the span of five minutes.
The next morning had Bart beaming as he ran up to his fellow teen heroes who were already on the watchtower. "Ohmygodyouguysdidyouknowthattoesocksareathing?! They'resocomfortableandIneverwannawearnormalmittsocksagain!"
Beast Boy blinked at the brunette speedster with a furrowed brow, Blue Beetle and Robin exchanging glances. "Uh, hermano, none of us caught what you said."
That only egged the teen on, and with a violent yank of his boot his bright green and yellow polka dot toe socks were exposed. Every other toe was a different color, alternating between red and yellow. "Toe socks! I didn't know they existed until now!"
Gar actually gagged. "Dude, those are so ugly!"
Bart shrugged. "They're comfy. Besides, look! I can wiggle them all on their own and they don't get as sweaty! Isn't that crash?" He wore a large smile on his face and Tim grimaced.
"You really need to get out more," he commented before looking back to his gloved wrist, holographic computer bright in the vastness of space.
"What's that mean? I get out plenty! I run with Flash all over the world every day!" He pouted, and when it seemed none of his teammates were going to care he decided to move onto his next victim.
Dick rubbed at his forehead, the Bat Cave's computer screens burning his retinas. A quick gust of wind and someone leaning on the back of his chair made the raven haired twenty year old angle his head up and quirk an eyebrow at the green eyes so close to his icy blue. "So you gonna tell me what's up with Bart?"
Wally frowned, his Flash cowl dangling from his neck. "What did he do?"
"Your son came running in here about fifteen minutes ago and wouldn't stop squealing over toe socks of all things. He barely left five minutes ago when I told him to talk to Superman about it."
The redhead facepalmed, his hand sliding down his face. "I shouldn't have told him about toe socks."
"You really shouldn't have."
"I'll go save Superman."
The Bat smirked. "I have a feeling Clark won't mind."
"-and they're so soft! I mean, I think it's amazing that I can wear these! Nightwing says he loves toe socks too, but prefers hospital socks. What make hospital socks so great? Wouldn't they be icky? I feel like they'd be totally mode."
Wally bit his lip to prevent himself from laughing when he saw his kid talking amiably with Clark Kent on the swinging bench connected to the front porch of the Kent farmhouse, Conner barely visible through the glass in the kitchen. Clark had his feet stretched out to lightly push the two of them back and forth, his long muscular frame barely able to reach the railings wrapping around the deck. Planted firmly on Clark's feet were Superman themed toe socks, the majority blue while his toes were bright red. There were even little red capes hanging off the back. "Maybe you should start a toe sock club," the Man of Steel offered with a smile. "I promise to join."
"Really?! That would be so crash!"
"I'll join too," Conner stated as he walked out with a tray of chocolate milk and cookies, green toe socks of his own reaching mid calf in the brisk February weather.
Wally pulled his phone out, taking a picture of the three superheroes comparing their toe socks with excited expressions.
Bart's obsession with the toe socks had gotten out of hand. Wonder Woman had joined the TSC, or Toe Sock Club after Cassie had convinced the Amazon warrior to try them. Hal, John, and Guy all brought their glow in the dark toe socks, parading around the watchtower without their shoes on. It had gotten to the point that even Hawkwoman and Hawkman were wearing nothing but toe socks on their feet, even when going out to battle.
"We need to have a talk," Batman stated as soon as the Justice League meeting had started. "Kid Flash's TSC has gone too far. So far, there are a total of twenty two members. At first, it was inconsequential. However, there have been multiple reports of heroes across the globe wearing nothing but toe socks." Clips and images of heroes popped up, one of Green Arrow jumping from rooftop to rooftop wearing bright green toe socks with arrows on them. Another showed Red Hood in gun themed red and black toe socks, Nightwing chasing after him in toe socks as well. They were black, though there was white writing on the bottom of them. One said Fuck and the other said Off. Wally had to stifle a laugh at the video clip of Trickster and Piper (who were two villains that shouldn't have even known about the TSC) robbing a store of a few dozen toe socks, a pair on each of their feet already. "As of now, toe socks must be put away. Shoes are required at all times on the watchtower and should be worn in battle. It's incredibly dangerous to have skin openly exposed and vulnerable when fighting." The Dark Knight looked at Wally with a serious expression. "Flash, talk with your protege. I want the TSC either disbanded or for the toe sock dilemma to be solved by the end of the day."
A smirk spread across Bruce's face at the Toe Sock Club's meeting. He watched the cameras with mirth as Bart sadly explained that the TSC would be on a temporary break until further notice. Alfred walked down the stairs of the Bat Cave, an eyebrow raised at the events unfolding on the computer screens as he set a tray of tea and sandwiches down. "Master Bruce, I am shocked you did not join this so called club."
Batman looked at the butler with a coy smile, leaning back in his chair and putting his feet up on the rounded out desk. "I did. I just didn't tell anyone."
"That's not how you join a club, Master Bruce," the older man commented dryly as he walked away. The Dark Knight just chuckled, his Batman themed toe socks with little capes crossed and planted firmly in front of the camera as he munched on a decrusted sandwich.
A/N: Aand that's it! Took me almost fourth minutes or so and I regret absolutely nothing. Toe socks are god tier clothing.
Love,
sKaEtrgrL
