A/N: sorry for the short chapter, and for the wait. Guess I just don't want Citadel to end!


When Miranda and Oriana showed up later that evening, the party was already in full swing. Liara had even reprogrammed Glyph's physical projection to wear a little bow tie, and to spin it whenever anyone mentioned it.

Inexplicably, Grunt seemed the most amused by this. For nearly half an hour, he had parked himself in front of Glyph, saying the words 'bow tie', and then laughing uproariously as it spun. The moment it stopped, he'd do it again, until Del finally had to chase him off toward the ryncol.

People gathered in ever shifting clusters; one in the kitchen, one in the small sitting room, one in the main living room, and one up on the balcony overlooking the rest. While the membership of these groups constantly changed, the size of them stayed amazingly constant, at least once most of the food had been eaten.

Del had left the one in the living room as the boys started to rib Joker about not having a gun in the cockpit, wandering into Anderson's office where a poker game had started up. Steve, Vega, and Garrus had taken seats along with Tali, and as Shepard came in she heard what the quarian was saying to the others and had to suppress a smirk.

"Are you sure? I'm not really that good at games, there was always work to do on the Flotilla. I still don't think I'm quite getting it."

"I'll run through it again," Steve said, shuffling the cards. "So everyone gets two cards to begin with…"

As he continued to patiently outline the ground rules of Texas Hold'em, Del could see both Garrus and Vega suppressing smirks. Meeting Tali's eyes, Del gave her a wink.

"Hey, Captain! Join us," Steve said, gesturing to an empty seat. "We're teaching Tali how to play."

"Oh? Well, maybe later. Just take it easy on my Mei Mei, all right? Anyone want another drink?"

Del thought she heard a faint snort as Vega struggled not to laugh. He, like Garrus, was well aware that Tali knew how to play poker. Del herself had taught her, years ago on the original Normandy, and she was quite the devil at cards. The quarian delighted in playing the innocent, and then walking away with the entire table.

Shortly after Tali had joined them on the Collector mission, both she and Del had managed to convince Donnelly that neither of them really knew how to play, and they had taken Ken for 'everything but his boots', to use the Alliance vernacular.

"I could use another cerveza," Vega said.

"Cerveza? Did you miss that we have tequila?" Del asked.

"Well, I usually wait until later in the evening to start hitting the tequila, but it is a party, right?"

"That's damn right. I'll get some in here. Tali? Garrus? Steve?"

"I'm good," Steve said, gesturing to his rum and coke. Garrus and Tali both waved her off, but as Del turned to go Vega reached out and caught her arm.

"What I want to know is when that pastel de queso is gonna be ready."

"It's cooling down now," Del said.

"Pastel de queso?" Steve asked. "Isn't it easier just to say cheesecake?"

"It's easier to say 'Steve' instead of 'Esteban' too, pendejo, but I don't do things because they're easy."

"What's a cheesecake?" Tali asked.

"Earth dessert," Steve told her. "I saw Nan made about three or four of them earlier this afternoon. Not sure if it's safe for you guys to eat."

"Ahem," Del said, fixing Steve with a look. He blinked at her.

"What?"

"Who said Nan made them?"

"Oh, sorry. Liara did, I'm guessing? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Del wants you to think she made them," Garrus said dryly, and Del's glare landed on him.

"I did make them," she said. As Vega and Garrus laughed, her glare deepened.

"Good one, boss," Vega said.

"I'm not joking, Mr. Vega," she told him.

"C'mon, Lola, everyone knows you can't cook. Remember what happened that one day you got sick of Rupert's slop and tried to make lunch for everyone? Half the crew was lined up outside Chakwas' door."

"It wasn't that bad," Del said, folding her arms.

"And the other half was lined up outside the restroom."

"For one thing, Tiny, even if I can't cook that doesn't mean I can't bake. And-"

As soon as she said 'bake', Vega roared with renewed laughter, tears in his eyes. Garrus was going off nearly as badly, with both Steve and Tali staring at them in bemused wonder.

"Fine. Fine! See if either of you get any 'pastel de queso'."

"I'm sorry," Vega said, wiping at his eyes, grinning widely. "But if you really did make them, that's probably a good thing, isn't it? That we don't get any?"

That set Garrus off again and as he and Vega nearly fell out of their chairs Del threw her hands up into the air. "Assholes, both of you."

Del headed back into the kitchen, where Liara, Nan, Helen, and Kasumi had gathered and were chatting. She went immediately for the pies cooling on the sideboard and grabbed one, sliding it on the counter in front of Kasumi.

"Is that what I think it is?" Kas asked, eyes sparkling.

"Yup," Del said. "And you can have this entire one all to yourself if you do me a big favor."

"Anything!"

Del's grin was wicked as she asked, "Did you bring your cloak?"


"In my time, we would never be in such a group together. Prime targets conglomerated into an enclosed space. It is strategically unwise," Javik was saying as Del and Liara walked in the living room half an hour later. Del had a whiskey in her hand, a smoldering cigar between her fingers, and didn't miss a beat.

"That's us. To the crew of the Normandy- and our primitive and strategically unwise party!"

"Oorah," Ashley laughed, thrusting her own drink up into the air as if to toast them all. Javik scowled.

"I think I know the reason that our cycle is going to kick the Reaper's ass while yours didn't," Wrex said. He was leaning nearby, listening.

"Yeah, because they didn't have a Shepard," Joker said, and Del smirked at him.

"Nope," Wrex said. "It's because the Protheans didn't have a krogan guarding the front door."

Del blinked, then turned in her seat to see Grunt standing over by the front door, facing the security monitor.

"The hell is he doing?"

"It seems word of our little gathering got out," Ashley told her. "He's keeping the squealing fan girls from storming us."

"What? That's ridiculous. What squealing fan girls?"

"Well, some of them are squealing fan boys," Ashley said with a shrug. "Hey, you remember that one guy all those years ago on the Citadel? This was right after Eden Prime. Oh, what was his name…you remember the one, Shepard. He all but cried in joy when you stopped to talk to him."

"Conrad Verner," Del told her.

"You remember his name?" Joker asked, and Del nodded.

"Yeah. I mean, everyone remembers their only fan, don't they?"

Liara leaned over slightly and bumped her shoulder to Del's. "He was hardly your only fan."

Del smiled affectionately at the asari. "Well, I mean, there's you." She waved her hand loosely at the others. "And, you know, you guys, but you're all crazy."

"I am just an enthusiast," Javik said. "And barely that."

"I'm more a buff," Ashley said.

Joker raised his beer. "Devotee, here."

"Aficionado," EDI said, gesturing at herself.

"Merely an admirer."

Del turned her head at the last one to see Samara sitting on the floor, in the shadows near the window, apparently meditating.

"I myself am a groupie," Wrex said with a grin. "And sorry, Liara. I don't think 'fan' fits you either. You strike me more as a-"

"Maniac?" Joker.

"Zealot," EDI said.

"Fiend," Ashley.

"I was going to say 'sucker', but-" Wrex said, then laughed as Del grabbed one of the decorative pillows off the sofa and pitched it at him.

"Well, however we would label ourselves," Liara said, "you have far more than one single fan, Del. Did Tela Vasir not ask you to sign her breastplate?"

Del, just taking a sip of her whiskey, nearly spit it back out. "What? Where did you hear-"

"I may not have been the Shadow Broker, but I was still a broker when you came to my apartment on Illium. Do you think I would not have surveillance devices?"

"I…I don't remember her saying that."

"She did."

"Well, then…I mean, it doesn't really count. Not an hour later she was trying to kill both of us."

"That doesn't mean she wasn't a fan," Ashley pointed out.

"Yeah. On Tuchanka, that's pretty much what a fan is supposed to do," Wrex added.

"I don't know what I was thinking," Del said to the room in general. "I don't even like you guys when you're sober, what made me think I'd like you any more when you're all drunk?"

As they laughed, Vega appeared with a broody expression, cracking open a beer and sitting down.

"Everything ok, Vega?" Del asked.

"Nah, busted out. It was weird."

"I thought you were doing well?" Liara said.

"I thought so too, even though Tali is a damn shark. I must have had too many beers. I swear I had five hundred more in chips and I go to call the pot and it turns out I've only got five?"

"Huh, that is weird," Del said dryly. "Probably best to stay away from the poker table until you're more sober."

"More sober?" he said, his brood turning into a half-grin. "This is a party, Lola. There is no 'more sober' for me tonight. You said we had tequila?"

"Yup, it's barely been touched. Better get it while the getting's good."

He got up again, heading for the kitchen, and Liara leaned into Del. "I see Kasumi is doing her part so far."

"Please," the thief said, her cloak vanishing as she appeared standing next to the sofa. She dropped a stack of poker chips on the table. "Shepard gave me an entire cheesecake. I'm just getting started."


"What is this?"

Miranda and Oriana stepped into the lobby of Tiberius Towers to see a rather harried looking doorman and about two dozen people. Half of them seemed drunk, the other half high as kites as they danced to no music, cheered, and jostled each other trying to get into the open elevator. As they watched, one group of three or four managed to get in, only to come out again a few moments later, grumbling angrily.

"Please, please, only one or two at a time!" The doorman was saying, as another four tried to get around him and into the car. "I'm telling you, they are not letting anyone else up! You are wasting your time and crowding our lobby! I will call C-Sec!"

The threats and pleading went unnoticed, but neither did the car move. Barely had the newcomers crammed into it than they were coming out again, just as dejected and angry as the first group.

"Hang on, I don't like this," Miranda said, catching her sister's arm. "Maybe this was a bad idea…"

"You haven't been to many parties, have you Miri?" Her sister laughed. "These are just gatecrashers. Come on."

"I don't-"

Oriana refused to let go, pulling her older sister matter-of-factly into the lobby and through the crowd with a well-planted elbow or two. Reaching the doorman she said, "We were invited to the penthouse."

"You and everyone on the Strip, if you believe this lot!" he said. "This is ridiculous!"

"I agree," she said. "Let us in the elevator, and when we get up to the penthouse, we'll make sure these people get out of your lobby, all right?"

"I would be indebted if you could do that, but I won't believe it until I see it." He gestured at the car. "You're free to try your luck."

The two slipped into the car, Miranda 'discouraging' a drunk young man from joining them with a momentary biotic goose. As he hopped back out, swatting at his rear end as if he expected it to be aflame, the security monitor in the lift car lit up.

{I already said n-…oh. Miranda!} Grunt looked almost disappointed. {I'm unlocking the car. C'mon up.}

Indignant shouts echoed in the car as the door started to close, and Oriana gave the gaggle a cheeky little 'goodbye' wiggle of her fingers, before they were born swiftly upward.

The small hall between the lift and the penthouse door was blessedly quiet. Almost as soon as they stepped off, the door opened and Grunt poked his head out.

"Grunt, what the hell is going on?" Miranda asked. "The lobby is a madhouse!"

"Yeah, everyone wants to get in," he grinned. "It's fun to tell them no."

"Fun or not, the doorman is about ready to strangle someone. Does Del know it's that bad?"

"Does Del know what is that bad?" Shepard asked, looking over as the three stepped into the apartment, Grunt closing the door.

"There are at least two dozen people in the lobby trying to get up here," Miranda told her, as Shepard got to her feet and headed over. "The staff is threatening to call C-Sec."

"Really? They want up here? Why?"

"Oh, I don't know," Miranda said, folding her arms. "You're only about the most famous woman in the galaxy."

Del smirked and rolled her eyes. "Hardly. When I was in New York, all you had to hear was the word 'party' and half the damned city gangs showed up, hoping for free booze and free food."

"This isn't New York," Miranda said. "See for yourself."

Del stepped over to the monitor and switched it on. "Yes? This is a private-"

She ducked, wincing as the air was filled with squeals of delight so high-pitched dogs were probably barking on Noveria.

"OHMIGOD IT'S CAPTAIN SHEPARD!"

"Holy shit what was that?!" Vega shouted from across the apartment as Del tried to get her hearing back, fumbling for the panel switch.

"CAPTAIN SHEPARD I LOVE YOU!"

"PLEASE SIGN MY UNDERWEAR!"

"I WANT YOUR BABIES!"

"Oh good FUCK no!" Del said this last as she finally got the off button, and the feed snapped off.

"I know, ridiculous right?" Grunt said with a smirk. "You can't just have babies with everyone that asks, you have to have standards."

"Jesus. Wrex!"

As Wrex appeared and headed toward them, Del looked at Grunt. "You two are going down there and chasing that mob out of the lobby for good. And bring the doorman a beer, on me. The poor man doesn't deserve this shit."