Author's note: I know this chapter is short, but I wanted to get this update out as I'm really excited to write some of the juicer upcoming chapters. Just a few things here from me, 1) I've really appreciated all your comments and well wishes. Of course, I try to reply where I can, but it's been difficult to interact with guest reviews, so I've decided to start replying to some in the reviews section myself. So if that's you, keep your eyes peeled there. I may also update on my progress there from time to time etc. 2) I've got quite a few dilemmas on some specific details of the plot that are coming up. Some of you reached out the last time I asked, so I may be reaching out to consult those who wished to be interacted with. As always, my PM's are open if you would like to discuss anything. Without further ado, Happy reading!
By the time Jay and Erin had arrived in Bucktown, Jay's mind was preoccupied in his thoughts. He had been such a jackass to Erin, his own anger and annoyance surprising even him coming seemingly out of nowhere. And he wasn't really sure why it was there, or why he couldn't fully shake it, even after he and Erin seemed to talk it out. All he did know though, was whilst his ire was not directed at her, she had felt like it was, and that had made Jay feel like all sorts of crap. He did know however, that his annoyance was directed at the man who had called Erin. As soon as he saw the picture of Erin and the man he assumed was called Nathan as caller ID had directed him to, he felt a deep knot settling in his stomach. One so tight and so prominent that he could feel it taking over his body, anxiety climbing into his chest and clouding his thoughts. It hit him like a wave, and caused him to mentally be knocked back, suddenly unable to think anything but angry thoughts. His whole body had stiffened, and he felt like he was becoming mad with the lack of control he felt over his body and emotions. He knew at that moment he had to leave the breakroom.
He was angry at everything. At the situation with Hank, at Erin's ill luck, at her pain and suffering. But mostly he was angry at this Nathan. He didn't know who the guy was, but from his guess looking at the picture, he could have been anyone from her boyfriend to her partner. Or maybe both his mind had said. The thought filled him with sickening rage. He used to be both. No he was more. He wasn't just her partner and her boyfriend, he was her best friend too. Maybe Nathan was her best friend too now, his mind had wandered. Jay tried to shove the thought aside, but to no avail which only deepened his vexation. Is that why Erin had found it so easy to cut him out of her life? Because she had found someone to fill his place exactly. Was he so replaceable for her? She had told him once when they eventually began dating that the reason Hank was so against them being together initially was because he thought she left a string of broken hearts behind her. Was his Sargeant actually right? Was Jay just another broken heart on a long conveyor belt? Did he not once mean to her as much as she did to him? As all these questions ran through his mind, Jay could not help but feel deeply hurt at the prospect of some of the answers. Even now, after all these years, after he had finally moved on romantically, he still cherished Erin's friendship and companionship. Did she even remotely feel the same? He sure hoped so, especially seeing as her apology in the car indicated she cared about how he felt. For now, that alone brought him some peace of mind.
But to this Nathan, his anger was not immediately quelled. Whoever he was to Erin, the picture had suggested they were close. So where was he now? When she needed him, when she was suffering and in pain with her father-figure potentially on his deathbed, where was he? And more importantly, where had he been when Erin had driven herself into a state of drunken fury and felt so worthless that she almost took her life. Why had he not been there to hold her, and tell her that her life was worth living? That she was loved and that she was cared for and that she would be deeply missed if anything had happened to her. Why had he not rocked her in her arms and wiped away the tears from her cheeks? Why had he not done what Jay would have without blinking had he of still been present in her life, even if they were no longer dating. Jay had been unable to ask Erin this though, out of fear that he would upset or offend her. So instead, he sat there stewing in silence, something that he realised had eventually meant he unintentionally upset her with anyway.
"So apparently this girl of Russo's has been put up here in an apartment with the money from Russo's side dealings," Erin spoke, reading off the messages that Ruzek had just sent her, "and it seems like she's one of many."
Erin's voice reminded Jay how they were on the job now, and how he had to stay present and focussed. Erin wasn't currently carrying a badge or a firearm, and he had to ensure both their safety.
Jay scoffed at her words.
"He must be making a pretty penny if he can afford to put them all up," he replied, "probably deeper in all of this than we thought."
"Tell me about it," Erin stated grimly.
Jay pulled out his chained badge from his pocket and hung it around his neck. The chain reminded him of the dog tags Erin wore around hers. The ones she had been clutching on to during her call to Nathan. The tamed fire within him burned brighter at the thought, and Jay tried his best not to let it show. He didn't want things to turn tense or awkward between them again.
Elisha had opened the door on the first knock, the girl waiting for the pair to arrive since she had called in. Erin knew from the moment she had seen the girl that something was wrong. She looked angry, defiant and tired. Something Erin was all too familiar with. It was only once she saw the girl, no older than twenty, sitting on the couch huddled up and red-eyed that Erin understood why. A fresh gash was painted across the girl's cheek, a purple bruise forming under the angry red wound. Her lip too was swollen and busted, and Erin felt an uncontainable rage fill her. She had seen women like this before. She had been this woman before. Her whole body tensed as her mind wandered deep into her dark and painful past. A warm hand touched her lower back, the thumb rubbing lightly up and down in a soothing motion which helped to relax her body slightly. She looked to Jay who was by her side, to see him offer her a reassuring look. He understood. She could also see the fury in his eyes, he too was angry at the sight.
Erin approached the girl cautiously so as not to scare her and spoke.
"Hi, this is Detective Jay Halstead and I'm…" she paused struggling to figure out what to say. Who was she? What capacity was she here in?
"Agent Erin Lindsay," Jay finished off for her with a knowing look. "We just wanted to ask you a few questions."
The girl nodded timidly.
"Can we start with your name?" Jay ask with a small supportive smile.
"It's Tessa. Tessa Parker."
Her voice was raw, cracking from the pain she felt and the hoarseness of all the crying she had been doing. Erin's heart bled for the pain this girl was feeling.
"Can you confirm for us how you know Evan Russo for us Tessa?"
"I met him at a party. I was cold, and hungry and in pain. I hadn't eaten properly in days and didn't have a roof over my head. I was looking for a fix, something to numb the pain. He was there. He offered me food and a place to stay if I worked for him. At first I thought he meant a job but I realised he meant sexual favours. I'm not proud of it but I was really desperate."
Erin nodded.
"It's okay. We're not coming with judgement here. We just want to figure some things out so we can help you."
"We're going to do everything in our power to make sure Evan gets behind bars and doesn't take advantage of you again," Jay confirmed, his voice low but clear.
Erin knew what that voice meant. He was angry. Heck, so was she. The marks that marred the face of the girl in front of her were enough to make her want to knock out the teeth of the man who did this to her.
"I'm assuming he's the one that…" Jay gestured at the girls injuries with his hand.
She nodded slowly, tears filling her eyes again. Erin's own eyes began to water slightly out of sympathy for this girl.
"What caused him to snap?"
"I've known El for a few years now. As long as I've known Evan. She's been good to me and I always knew I could trust her. Charlie, her boyfriend, is friends with Evan, so we became closer from the network of all the parties we would be dragged along to."
Elisha nodded from beside the girl as Tessa continued.
"She told me yesterday that the cops were looking into Evan for his dealing. I knew he dealt low level stuff, but I could never imagine it was the kind of things he actually dealt with. This morning I heard him talking on the phone to Charlie, they seemed to be in some argument. Evan wanted a meeting arranged with someone called Tommy and Charlie said it wasn't happening. Evan was on edge, said the cops were beginning to sniff around because one of them got hurt because of Barratt and that's not what he signed up for- drugs was one thing but he wasn't willing to go down for aiding and abetting a cop murderer. When he got off the phone and realised I was eavesdropping he snapped…" her voice cracked. "I mean he's hit me before but never this badly."
"I'm sorry," Erin whispered, breaking all the protocol of CPD training she had about not getting emotionally attached to victims during questioning.
Jay finished scribbling the last of his notes in his notepad before speaking.
"Is there anything else? Anything at all that you can remember that might help us?" he questioned.
"Yeah," Tessa replied. "Charlie wanted to know more about how he knew the cops were sniffing around but he refused to say anything. So they agreed to meet at a cafe in Wicker park at 2pm today."
"You got the address?" Jay asked.
She nodded and relayed which Cafe it was to him.
"Thank you Tessa. We'll be in touch," Jay said before moving along towards the door.
Erin paused for a moment, looking to Elisha.
"Take care of her. And call me if you need anything."
"Sure, thanks Erin."
Erin smiled sadly at both women.
"Any time," she replied and followed Jay out the door and out the building.
Jay put his notebook in his pocket and let out a deep exhale. Erin did the same.
"I swear to God, If I ever see any of these men…" Erin began, her anger taking over her and making her unable to finish her sentence.
"That's if you see them first," Jay muttered angrily.
His phone buddenly, Erin's doing the same a few seconds later.
"It's Adam," he said. "Saying we have to get straight back to the district. There's something there we need to see ASAP."
Erin frowned, looking to Jay in confusion.
"Funny. Kim just sent me the same thing."
The two former partners hurried to the truck, a sense of urgency and anxiety taking over them both at the ambiguity behind the request in the messages they had both been sent.
They arrived back at the district in record time, both rushing past the front desk, noticing that their desk Sergeant was not positioned in her usual place. Jay fumbled with the palm scanner as the cage door unlocked and both Erin and Jay rushed up the steps and into the bullpen slightly breathless.
The bullpen was empty, the team all crowded into the breakroom having formed a crowd. Laughter was heard. Upon hearing Jay and Erin enter the section designated for the intelligence unit, Trudy Platt was the first to leave the breakroom and enter the bullpen to greet them.
"Took you too long enough," she said with disapproval.
"Sarge, we came as soon as we got the message."
"You never were brainy, were you, Chuckles? That was sarcasm in case you didn't originally detect it. I bet you broke a few speed limits on your way back."
Erin let out a laugh.
"You could say that. He nearly killed us with his driving."
"I always knew you were better behind the wheel girl," Trudy winked at Erin, as Jay scoffed at the remark feigning offense.
"So what was the urgency for then, Sarge?" he questioned as the rest of the team slowly began filing out of the breakroom and into the bullpen.
"See for yourself," she replied.
A small gasp let loose from Erin's lips as she squawked in delight.
"Antonio!" she exclaimed, closing the distance between her and the former detective who she considered to be a brother.
"Hey Er," he replied with a smile, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and pulling her in for a hug whilst kissing the top of her forehead.
"You came!" Erin half wailed, as she became increasingly emotional at seeing her friend here, in front of her, healthy and well. She now finally felt complete. Since she had arrived in Chicago, it felt like something wasn't fully right, and now he was here, everything felt like it was how it was meant to be. Well at least almost everything.
"Of course I came Erin. You called me didn't you? You're family. I'm here whenever you need," he said, pulling back from her to get a better look at her face.
Erin sniffled slightly, blinking back the tears of joy that were forming in her eyes.
"Besides," Antonio began, a slight smirk crossing his lips. "I was getting tired crying myself to sleep every night from missing you."
A laugh escaped Erin. It was hearty and genuine as she rolled her eyes and smacked his chest with the back of her hand.
She turned to Hailey.
"I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to tell you thi morning. I know you're running point and I should have run it by you first but erm…"
Hailey waved her off dismissively.
"Don't be silly," she replied. "Antonio's family, he's always welcome. Besides, I meant it when I said we could do with all the help we can get."
Erin nodded.
"Hey man," Antonio said, turning to Jay. "It's been a long time brother."
Jay who had been silently standing besides Erin in shock snapped out of it.
"Too long," he replied nodding before pulling his friend into a man hug, both clapping the other on the back. "If i'd known Puerto Rico was that great, I might have joined you down there," Jay teased. "Must be great to have a place to escape to."
"Well we can't all have a place in Wisconsin that we can escape to, now can we?"
Jay and Erin both freezed. Most of the team expectedly looking at the pair knowingly.
They both turned around to where the voice had come behind them, Jay's eyes widening in shock at the sight.
"Greg?" he questioned.
"One and only," he replied with his signature Mouse smirk.
Jay stood frozen, still quite not believing what he was seeing.
"What are you..?" he choked up unable to form his thoughts into coherent words.
The smile slipped slightly from Mouse's face as it grew serious for the moment. Erin could tell he anticipated Jay would not like what he had to say. She had kept in touch with Mouse over the years. Doing so had made her in her own way feel closer to Jay. But she also knew that Mouse was no longer a part of the team, and had left struggling with what his role had meant for him, the same way she had. In a lot of ways, they were alike in that sense. But even she was surprised by his return, unable to understand what he was doing here or why he was back from the desert.
"I was relieved from duty on medical discharge some three months ago."
"Mouse…" Jay began in shock and worry. He was always scared his friend would be injured on the job, and his worries were now confirmed as being well founded.
"Jay, I was fine. I am fine."
"Why didn't you tell me you were back? Why didn't you come back home?" Jay questioned.
"I knew if I did, you would only panic and worry. The plan was to heal up first and then do so. It was, sorry, is, only a temporary leave. Fractured my foot when it got crushed by some rubble that was displaced by a grenade."
"That still doesn't explain what you're doing here now."
"Antonio got in touch with me a month ago. Said he was working on a hurricane relief and the hospital there needed a tech expert who could help set things up voluntarily. He emailed to ask me if I knew anyone, but when he heard I was back and biding time before I could get deployed again, he invited me down."
Jay nodded processing it all. Tears filled his eyes as he acknowledged that Mouse was here, safe in Chicago, and not in the barracks that plagued his dreams.
"C'mere man," Jay said, pulling his friend in for a hug. He didn't care that he was crying in front of everyone. He was just so happy to be back.
When Jay finally pulled back, Erin stepped forward to replace Jay's arms with her own.
"Hey stranger," Erin said with a smile.
"Erin," he acknowledged placing a friendly kiss on her cheek. And then he whispered much quieter so the rest of the team could not hear. "How are you holding up?" he asked.
During one of their calls over the years, Erin had let out that she had been hospitalised. Whilst she didn't say why, Mouse had caught on to the self-loathing in her voice and had been able to piece together the reason behind her near death experience. Since then, he had made it a priority to keep tabs on his brother's former girl, one he couldn't believe Jay had let go of, knowing full well just how much she meant to him. So he kept the fact that he was in touch with her out of the conversations he had with his best friend, knowing full well Erin needed to heal.
When Erin finally removed herself from Mouse's arms, the room grew quiet and reflective.
"So what's in Wisconsin?" Vanessa asked.
"Meth labs," Antonio replied.
Erin snorted, covering her mouth to stifle the laugh threatening to escape.
"Seriously man?" Jay groaned at his friend in disapproval.
"No, really, what's in Wisconsin?" Vanessa asked again curiously.
"Jay has a cabin out there. Was his grandfather's. Great place to retreat to, been there a few times myself. One of his favourite places in the world and I get why. It's beautiful, you should see it."
"He does?" Hailey suddenly questioned, confusion apparent in her place as it became increasingly noticeable to Erin that she hadn't been privy to this news.
She looked to Jay from the side of her eye, noticing he looked uncomfortable. He stood there, scratching the back of his neck not looking anywhere in particular.
"He never mentioned it before," Hailey mused.
Erin felt guilty for the happiness and relief that spread through her when she heard those words. In some weird way, she felt like she had a claim on the cabin in Wisconsin, even though she had never actually been. It was a reminder of their plans together for their future. They were talking about retirement there, taking the kids they planned on having there. It was the life they had envisioned that had been snatched away by her cruel fate. But knowing it was still their little bubble, almost like it was their secret, made her feel better. Whilst the memory may just be that- a memory, Erin felt great relief in knowing it wasn't ruined by it belonging to anyone but her.
"Yeah, guess it didn't really cross my mind to mention it," Jay replied, his voice still sounding strange.
Both Antonio and Mouse caught on alongside Erin. Jay had revealed his plans to Mouse about what he wished for his and Erin's future during one drunken guys night when they had first started dating. And Antonio had been present during the end of the original conversation. He was a smart detective, he was able to piece two and two together.
Hailey looked unsure at his reasoning. The way Mouse had spoken of it, this was clearly a place which was significant and important to Jay. She opened her to voice this, but was stopped.
Antonio clapped his hands suddenly, to get rid of the awkward tension that was making its way into the air.
"Right, Mouse and I only have two days here with you all together, so you going to put us to work or what?" he questioned.
"Of course," Hailey replied, and everyone began to scatter, getting back to their desks and starting to work again.
As Hailey began to brief down the two men, Jay shot Antonio an appreciative nod over her shoulder. The former detective gave him a subtle nod in acknowledgement. Jay knew he may have escaped scrutiny for now, but he would have some explaining to do later. Truth was, he didn't tell Hailey because it had been his and Erin's place. It was their future and their hopes and dreams. Though he knew he should have told her, including Hailey in that would have been wrong, to both women. And for this, he could not say he was sorry.
Author's note: Surpriiiiiiiiiissse! Mouse is back too! Linstead's child alongside Nadia! And the gang's all back together now. I have no idea where I'm going with this in terms of Antonio and Mouse, but I knew I couldn't miss the opportunity to bring everyone back. I miss the early days so badly, so this is my tribute to including everyone. Hope you enjoyed, let me know what you think!
