- KANAYA: OPEN YOUR MOUTH AT THE END OF DINNER FOR THE WRONG PURPOSE
"Do You Have To Go?"
Before the words finished coming out of your mouth, you knew you shouldn't have said it. Rose pauses in the middle of cleaning up the table upon hearing you talk, a rare occurrence if you're honest with yourself. The dish washing, not the talking.
"Kanaya," she sighs, as the two of you move on to wash the dishes. "I thought we settled the matter already. The canon-"
You resist the urge to roll your eyes. "Yes We All Heard The Canon Speech Rose, And We Still Remember It." You interrupt her from one of her long winded spiels. Gog, you love her, but at times she can be trying.
"Then you know exactly what is at stake." She reminds you, as she half heartedly finished scrubbing her dish and hands it to you.
"Yes I Understand That Lord English Must Be Defeated In Order For Us To Exist," you say as you completely clean the dish, "But Do You Have To Participate In The Final Battle? Won't The Others Be Enough To Defeat Lord English? Jake Has Finally Mastered His Page of Hope Powers, And None Of The Others Come Close To Beating Him In Your Latest Training Session."
Rose begins to wash her glass "True, Jake will be our greatest asset in the battle, but we'll need every help we can get to tip the scales. Besides, I'm not a detriment in battle, or did you not notice that I lasted the longest?"
You place the dish in its place. "All The More Reason For Me To Join-"
"No."
"But I Can-"
"I SAID NO!" Rose slammed her glass at the edge of the counter, and when she let go it fell to the floor, breaking. "Ah shit, sorry, I'll get that." She said as she goes off to find something to pick up the pieces of glass
"No, No, Let Me Dear." You offer, as you open a closet and begin to get rid of the broken glass. For a moment, the only sound through the House was the faucet running water over the dirty utensils, and the sound you make as you pick up the shards.
Rose broke the silence first. "I'm sorry Kanaya, I should not have yelled. But you know as much as I do that the visions…" she trailed off.
You pause for a moment, before standing up and moving to throw the glass away. You knew what she didn't want to say. No matter how many times Rose tried to see, all possibilities where the non God Tiers tried to come along ended badly. It seems Caliborn was no fool, and went after the weak link first.
"But There Has To Be Something You Overlooked! You Cannot Plan For All Eventualities Rose!" You didn't mean to raise your voice as well, or to hurt her ego, but what's done is done. It started as a nagging feeling, but it slowly grew and grew until you had to voice it out.
Rose, for her part, looks slightly hurt at your statement. She was leaning on the wall, not looking at you. You're unsure of what to do, so you turn to leave the kitchen. "I Am Sorry, But That Is Just How I Feel About The Whole Affair."
You leave the kitchen, but stop as you feel a gentle hand on your shoulder. "No, I understand, you don't need to be sorry." The reassuring hand moves, and soon you feel Rose hugging you from behind. "That's how I feel too dear. I can't bear to see you hurt. I promise, I'll rethink our battle plans, and see if there's anything I forgot that could help."
You break the hug. Regrettably. You turn to her. "Do You Have Any Ideas?"
"Well I'm sure I'll think of something." She says, with a reassuring loving smile.
"I Know You Will Love." You say. You know she's already reworked her plans over and over, but there's something about seeing her smile that fills you with confidence.
… and other feelings. The L Word for one. The other L Word as well. You close the gaps between the two of you, and turn on the full Kanaya charming smile that won Rose over.
"Yes? Was there something else on your mind?" She says, her face full of concern. Sweet, but not the feeling that you were hoping to evoke.
Hmm. Plan B then. "Well, I Still Have Some Concerns, And I Could Use A Little… Persuasion." you say, as you gently rub her arms up and down, and give her the look.
A look of recognition dawns on her, and she smirks. "Oh? Well we can't have that can we?" She says, as she scoops you up and carries you in what humans called the princess position. Ah she finally gets it you think, even as you feel giddy as she carries you to your bedroom.
"My, Rose, Whatever Could You Be Planning On Doing To Me?" You ask, as she gently puts you on your side of the bed.
"Something fun for the both of us" she chuckles, as she undoes her dress.
Later on, you think, all of your concerns and troubles melt away in the heat of the moment.
- KANAYA: LIE SOME TIME LATER POST COITUS
You lied. In more ways than one. There's the physical sense, where you're lying awake in your bed as Rose sleeps next to you. Then there's the literal sense, in which you lied about your earlier thought. Then again, both usage of the word lie is literal.
You're losing your train of thought. Focus, Kanaya. The sex was amazing, maybe even better than usual, and during the intense session you can feel her passion for you. But now as you lie awake, hearing her soft breathing, you can't help but wonder. Is this all you can do for her? Wait for her safe return? The love filled moment has passed, and you're still worried.
You turn, and upon seeing Rose sound asleep, you quietly get out of bed, dress yourself somewhat decent and make your way to the living room. There, now you can think. You absentmindedly begin to do the dishes again. Cleaning always helps you think.
Think you did. You went over what everyone did, all the training and exercises, all the strategies they planned out, and you have to admit, Rose and the others have well prepared for the final battle. They're in the best physical condition you've seen (and felt, in Rose's case) them in, and you can't really find any faults in their plan to defeat Caliborn. Still, maybe there's something everyone missed.
… everyone…
Finishing up, you pull up your phone. You're not sure how much of a difference it can make, but you can ask the other Godtiered humans to keep an eye out for Rose. You work out the choices in your head. Dirk and Jake will probably be too preoccupied with each other. You call the five remaining humans, but Jane, Roxy, Jade, and Dave seem to be busy or not picking up their phones. Odd that all five of them did that.
Only John is left. Truth be told… you deliberately didn't call him first. But it was a silly reason, so you call him. On the second ring he picked up. "Hello? What's up Kanaya?"
"I Apologize For Calling So Late John, I Do Hope I Did Not Wake You."
"No no it's fine, I was going over the plans anyway. So anything I can help you with?"
"Well, Coincidentally, The Matter I Was Hoping To Discuss With You Pertains To The Plans For The Upcoming Battle."
You swear you hear John mutter 'again?' Before hearing a clearer voice answer. "What about it?"
"I Am Not Entirely Certain How To Convey It Properly, So I Will Just Come Out And Say It. Can You Please Make Sure Rose Comes Home Safely?"
"Of course." You pause. That was… a fast answer. "Kanaya? Is something wrong?"
"Forgive Me, I Was Caught Offguard. I Was Not Expecting You To Agree Immediately." you confessed.
John chuckled. "Well, to be perfectly honest, you're not the first person to ask me this favor."
"Truly?"
"Yep! It started with Karkat calling me and asking me to make sure Dave doesn't die a hero, then Calliope called, then surprisingly both Dave and Jade called me to watch out for the other one. Great minds think alike huh?"
"Evidently We Do." You smile. It's nice to know that everyone has the same idea.
"You know what's funny though? The other godtiers also made me promise that if anything ever happens to them, that I take care of their significant others on Earth C. Heck, Rose pulled me aside at the end of today's training and made me swear on her entirely hypothetical grave that I'd make sure that I'll be there for you."
"Rose Did?" You did not expect that. You ignore the slight flash of jealousy when you heard them secretly talking behind your back.
"Oh." John paused, and you waited for him to continue. "I was supposed to keep it a secret. Don't tell Rose I told you."
"Your Secret Is Safe With Me." You begin the human gesture of secret with your hand and mouth, but stop when you remember you're on the phone and nobody's watching. Also Rose made fun of you when she saw you do it.
"Figured it would. It's funny, I didn't expect to be be everyone's first choice to take care of their loved ones. Do I give out a father like aura or something?"
Father? Ah, the human equivalent of lusii, you remember now. You shift a bit before you talk again. "In The Interest Of Being Truthful, You Were Not My First Choice John. The Others Were Busy."
"Oh." You can practically feel the disappointment in his voice.
"John, The Order In Which I Called You Does Not Matter. I Trust You. I Know You Will Keep Her Safe And Return Her To Me. I Am Just Calling You To Bring Me Peace Of Mind."
"Ah, did it work? Did you calm down?"
"Considerably." To your surprise, you meant it. You don't feel nearly as worried as you were before you called. "Thank You For Listening To My Unreasonable Request And Entertaining An Antique Manacle and Sphere."
John stayed silent for a moment before answering back "Did you mean the old ball and chain?"
"Yes." Your cheeks heat up as you embarrass yourself once again in messing up one of the human's phrases.
"You're welcome. Oh and Kanaya?"
"Yes?"
"I promise we'll come back safe and sound. All of us."
"I… Thank You."
You hear the tone signifying the end of your call. Well, you're not sure how big of a difference that conversation made, but hearing John promise fills you with confidence. No wonder he lead the humans as their… what was it Rose called him? Ah yes, friendleader.
You quietly make your way back to the room, where Rose is still sound asleep. You carefully lay down on the bed, with Rose none the wiser. The perfect crime.
"Where were you?" Or not. Quick, lie!
"I Didn't Go Anywhere." Smooth, Kanaya, smooth.
Rose stirred and turned towards you, blearily opening her eyes "I can see you're wearing a dress when I know you weren't before. Now spill dear."
You suppose there's no hiding things from a Seer. "I Was Still Worried About Tomorrow so I-"
She sighed in exasperation. "Kanaya-"
"No, I'm Fine Now! I Just Needed To Hear One Of Our Godtier Friends Say That They Will Ensure Your Safe Return. They Did, And I Can Rest Easy Now." You assure her.
"Oh. Well, as long as you're no longer worried." Rose said before yawning. "Out of curiosity, which of our friends was it? Roxy?"
"No, It Was John."
"Mmm, good old John. You can always depend on him." She sleepily murmured, before tucking herself in and going to sleep again.
You briefly wanted to wake her and ask about what she meant by depending on John, but you yawned and thought it's time to sleep at last. Rose needs her rest, and so do you. She's right in any case, just briefly talking with him did wonders for your peace of mind. You lie down to go to sleep for real.
- KANAYA: BE THERE SOMETIME LATER POST SLEEP
You're here.
You'd rather not dwell on the place of departure you find yourself standing upon. They all agreed to depart from the plains on the border of the four kingdoms to make it fair.
You'd rather not dwell on the fact that there's more people here than expected. You're not pointing fingers, but they seem to be a combination of the normal press following Jane around and Jake's fans.
You certainly would prefer not to dwell on the ignoble farewell your friends had. You've only ever seen Karkat cry this hard during one of his romcom binges he forced you to partake. Nevermind the mascara running down your face when you tearfully forced Rose to take your favorite Lipstick/Chainsaw.
No, you think, as John gets the other seven into formation. You prefer to look forward to meeting them again in one hour, just as planned.
"Alright everyone." John addresses you and the others that are not going. "We're off. We'll be back soon."
"GOOD LUCK!" Karkat said, beating you and the others to the punch.
John gave a smile and a thumbs up, and everyone held hands.
"OH!" Rose suddenly exclaimed, right as everyone ZAPS away. Startled, you just stand there looking at the spot they were just in a moment ago.
Oh? What was oh? Did she forget something? Did she suddenly find a way to beat Lord English? Or… did she suddenly see their failure and agonizing deaths? No, no, calm down. It doesn't mean anything. She probably felt weird being ZAPPED away. Your turn to see Calliope's reaction-
You see Red.
You see Red Godtier clothes.
You see Troll Godtier wings coming out of the back of Red Godtier Clothes.
You see the Red hood turn until Aradia's smiling face comes into view.
Your friend Aradia.
Your death and end to things obsessed friend Aradia.
Aradia Smiling Here = End right here right now.
Oh gog you're hyperventilating. Which shouldn't be possible since you're a Rainbow Drinker.
Wait. Aradia's smile… it's not that creepy one she has when she's excited about something dead. It's the warm one she shows you when she met Sollux again. Aradia stepped aside. Behind her you see-
"KANAYA!"
That shout was all you needed, you dash past Aradia and others amid shouts of people calling each other's names and hug your wife.
"I Thought I'd Never See You Again!"
"I thought I'd never see you again!"
You both shout at the same time, and laugh afterwards.
"Wait," Rose started. "Why did you think you'd never see me again?""
"I Saw Aradia Suddenly Appear And I Just Assumed The Worst!" You turn towards Aradia "I Am Sorry For Thinking Of You As A Harbinger Of Death." Aradia gave a thumbs up from her free hand- oh, in your panic you didn't notice Sollux there, holding her other hand.
"I don't blame you, it was certainly a close call dear. Oh before I forget, thank you." Rose says, before kissing you.
The bliss ended far too quickly, but you regain your clarity soon enough. "Thank Me For What Dear? My Weapon?"
"Oh. Yes. That thing." She muttered, before producing your lipstick. Or what was left of it. "I'm sorry to say your lipstick didn't come out of it in one piece, but you'll be glad to hear it tore Lord English a new one, as the saying goes."
"The State Of My Lipstick/Chainsaw Is Of No Importance, What Matters Is That You Are Fine." You pause, and eye her up and down. She looks battleworn, and her clothes are a bit ragged, but no visible wounds. "You Are Not Hurt?"
"No, I'm fine, and it's all thanks to you talking to me and John." You're confused, so you let her continue. "You gave me the idea to look for more backup, and you talked John into keeping an eye out for me. When the battle started again, Lord English fired his death beam at me-"
"WHAT?"
"It's ok, I'm fine, thanks to John! He pushed me out of the way. He was the first one who noticed Lord English preparing his beam, and he remembered what you said and instinctively pushed me out of the way!"
You have never been so glad in your life to talk to John.
"I also have you to thank for talking to me, I kept thinking right up to John ZAPPING is away, but I convinced him to make a detour to recruit someone."
You were about to ask who it is, when you realized it. "Aradia!" You exclaimed.
Rose nodded. "John and I went off to talk to her and managed to get her to help us in the final battle of Lord English. Me, Dave, Jade, and John pushed Lord English into a black hole, but we almost couldn't escape! Aradia saved us!"
"So Lord English Is No Longer A Threat? You Won't Have To Fight Anymore?"
Rose smiled. "No more." Before closing the gap once more. The details of the fight can wait. You can feel that there was more to the fight than she said, but it's not important. What's important is that the promise was kept. Rose is back home, safe and sound.
- BE SOLLUX JUST A FEW FEET AWAY
You smile at the sounds of celebration all around you. From what you hear, everybody's talking all at once. Dave and Karkat, Rose and Kanaya, Dirk and Jake, Roxy and Calliope, Jane, and Jade and John are laughing.
You turn to Aradia at your side. "So why did you cut watching the Dream Bubbles collapse into a Black Hole short and come here with them? I thought you wanted to see the ruins of an ancient civilization next?"
She paused for a moment before answering. "Well, we can always come back to that moment in time later. Right now, I just wanted to see our friends enjoy a well deserved victory."
"Besides", she said as she turned towards you and you can feel her kind smile turn into a wide shit eating grin. "I saw an immortal invincible demon get sucked into a black hole already. Wasn't that the coolest?" She then launched into a long winded account of how cool it was.
Smiling and enjoying how much fun she seemed to be having at explaining it to you, you hold her hand tighter as the background noises of joy compliments her tirade, Rose and Kanaya murmuring I love yous between kisses chief among them.
"Yeah, this is cool."
