Ayla's pregnancy astounded the whole clan. It seemed impossible that a woman with as powerful a totem as hers could conceive life. Speculation was rampant about the spirit of which man's totem had succeeded in overpowering the Cave Lion, and every man in the clan would have liked to claim the credit – and the boost to his prestige. Some felt it must have been a combination of several totemic essences, perhaps the entire male population, but most opinions fell into one of two camps, divided almost entirely along the lines of age.
Proximity to the woman was the determining factor, which was why most men believed the children of their mates were the result of their own totem's spirit. A woman inevitably spent more time with the man whose hearth she shared; the opportunity for swallowing his totem's spirit was greater. Even though a man's totem might call upon the assistance of another man's totem during the ensuing battle, or any spirit that happened to be nearby, the vital force of the first totem had primary claim. A helping spirit might be honoured with the privilege of beginning a new life, but it was at the discretion of the totem that asked for help. The two men who had been closest to Ayla since she had become a woman were Mog-ur and Broud.
"I say it's Mog-ur," Zoug asserted. "He's the only one with a totem stronger than the Cave Lion. And whose hearth does she share?"
"Ursus never allows a woman to swallow his essence," Crug countered. "The Cave Bear chooses those he will protect, as he did Mog-ur. Do you think a Roe Deer defeated a Cave Lion?"
"With the Cave Bear's help. Mog-ur has two totems. The Roe Deer wouldn't have to go far for help. No one says the Cave Bear left his spirit, I'm only saying he helped," Zoug contended hotly.
"Then why didn't she get pregnant last winter? She lived at his hearth then. It was only after Broud developed his attraction for her, though don't ask me what he ever saw in her. It was after he spent so much time near her that the new life started. A Woolly Rhinoceros is powerful, too. With help, it could have overcome the Cave Lion," Crug argued.
"I think it was everyone's totem," Dorv put in. "The question is, who wants to mate her? Everyone wants the credit, but who wants the woman? Brun asked if any man was willing. If she's not mated, the child will be unlucky. I'm too old, though I can't say I'm sorry."
"Well, I'd take her if I still had a hearth of my own," Zoug gestured. "She's ugly, but she's hardworking and respectful. She knows how to take care of a man. That's more important than good looks in the long run."
Zoug was astounded by his own words as soon as they had been signed. Would he really be willing to take this ugly, wilful woman to his hearth as a mate? It was true that she was hardworking, and she had always been respectful to him, but he also couldn't deny the fact that she had disobeyed clan tradition by learning how to hunt and by provoking a man often in a most unclanlike manner. Would he be willing to put up with that kind of behaviour if it ever happened again? It was one thing to tolerate or even approve of something when it was just any woman doing it, but it was something else when it was a man's own mate.
But then, why would anything like Ayla being so insolent to Broud ever occur again? No other man delighted in tormenting her, and she had never tried to provoke any other than him – certainly not Zoug. She was a good clan woman. And hadn't he spoken in favour of her hunting, was he not even proud of her skill and the fact that she had learnt it from him?
A strange image formed before Zoug's inner eye: he and Ayla, walking through the sun-dappled woods together, discussing the best way to hunt with the sling, stalking small animals . . .
But what was he thinking? Resolutely, Zoug shoved the image out of his mind. He was too old for a mate, he couldn't go on hunts with the men anymore and provide. It was pure fantasy, and he should know better than to –
"Zoug?"
He focused to find the other men staring at him.
"What is going on?" Droog asked. "You looked far off, almost like Mog-ur when he meditates."
"I was . . . distracted," Zoug motioned, wondering what they might think if they knew what exactly he had been imagining.
"We were discussing that if you really wanted Ayla, there could be a way, although I really don't know why you would," Dorv informed him.
Zoug withstood the temptation to tell him that if he thought repeating how much he didn't want Ayla would make him look manlier, he was mistaken. It would not do to insult another man, over a woman no less. "What do you mean?" he asked instead. "A woman and her child need a hunter who can go out with the men, and that time has been over for me for a while."
Crug shook his head. "We all know how proficient she is with the sling – although I can't say I'm fond of the idea – and you are still the best man with it in all the clans. I'll have to admit that you both contribute a fair share of meat, and you have sometimes brought home animals as big as small deer. Who is to say you couldn't provide for a hearth – together?"
His frown made it clear that he found the idea absurd to let a woman help provide for him, and Zoug wondered how he had even come to think of it. Crug was a very traditionally-minded man. But then, Ayla's presence had forced them all to think outside traditions in some ways, and after he had seen her come home with many a kill that those at Mog-ur's hearth had consumed without issue, maybe Crug was now catching on, even if he did not exactly approve.
Was it possible? Could two sling-hunters provide for themselves and a child? What about the long winters, for which they stockpiled all the meat the hunters could find on their hunting trips in the moons before it?
"What if it's not enough, especially in winter? I wouldn't want for my hearth to depend on everyone's charity." It was something entirely different from living at the hearth of his mate's son in his old age, as he had done since they had found the new cave.
Nobody answered for a while, then Mog-ur spoke up. "You were second-in command to the leader before Brun. As such, just as a retired leader, you are entitled to a portion of each kill now, though most retired seconds do not use that privilege and instead live at the hearths of their mate's children. Between that and the kills the two of you make, I don't think you would ever have to go hungry."
"That sounds like an acceptable solution to me," Brun motioned.
Zoug hesitated, but it was clan tradition, and as such, it was his right, just as Mog-ur received a portion of all kills, or as Brun would once he gave over leadership to Broud one day. There was no difference. And the thought of having his own hearth again was tempting – and again, there was the unbidden image of himself and Ayla, walking through the woods together.
"What about her child? If it's a son, there is a good chance I won't be well enough anymore to teach him hunting with the spear."
"If it is a boy, I will teach him myself," Brun replied. "I allowed for Ayla to be accepted into the clan, so I feel responsible for her and the child."
The answer satisfied Zoug; Brun was still a powerful hunter and a good teacher. Still, he was not quite certain.
"I will have to think about it."
.-.-.-.-.
Over the next days, Zoug kept watching Ayla as she went about her daily tasks. He noticed that despite her severe morning sickness, she did not shirk her work. In contrast to the time before her pregnancy, when Broud had kept relieving his needs with her, she was taking care of her appearance again and walking with a spring in her step unlike any other clan woman.
'A hunter's gait,' he thought, strangely pleased with his observation. Why would it matter to him, he wondered.
Despite that manly attribute, she did all things required of a good clan woman – she cooked, she weaved baskets, cured furs, helped with her younger sister, and was always quick and willing if a man had a task for her. She would be a dutiful mate and mother, Zoug was certain.
A few days after the discussion about Ayla's potential future mate, Mog-ur invited him to share an evening meal, and Zoug could not help but once again notice how harmonious life at this hearth was, and how Ayla, along with Iza, anticipated their needs quickly and unobtrusively.
It was after the meal, when Iza had made tea and Ayla was taking a cup over to Zoug that her attention slipped for just a moment and she stumbled, the tea spilling over to the floor at Zoug's feet. He would have had every right to scold her, and she knew it; her strange blue eyes were wide with surprise – and was it fear? Right then, Zoug decided that he had no business reprimanding her for an innocent mistake. Instead, he turned to Mog-ur, ignoring her.
"Your women are excellent cooks," he motioned. "The mate of the son of my mate cooks well too, but it's nice to have some variety and taste something different once in a while."
Mog-ur grunted, pleased with the compliment, and it didn't take long at all before the spilt tea was cleaned up and Ayla was kneeling in front of Zoug with a full cup. Accidents could happen to anyone every once in a while, and she would be an asset to any hearth, he thought that evening when he lay down in his furs.
Two days later, in the afternoon, he was sitting under a pine tree that grew close to the cave, as he often did these days, observing her while she cured the pelts of two wolverines she had killed the previous morning. When she was done, instead of bringing them inside the cave, she took them and quickly came over to him, dropping to kneel at his feet. Zoug was surprised – she had seemed completely engrossed in her work, yet she must have noticed him watching.
'But then,' the thought came to him, 'doesn't a hunter have to be always on his – or her – guard and pay close attention to the surroundings?'
What could she want? Zoug didn't make her wait, but quickly tapped her shoulder.
"Would the hunter like to have the pelts? It's only because of his teachings that I was able to make the kills. They would make for good foot coverings this winter."
For a few moments, Zoug bristled. A woman did not gift a man with furs to use for clothing – it was done the other way around! The man was the provider! The offer was insolent, and to accept it would be emasculating.
Ayla cringed at his feet; it was clear she must have noticed his anger. The sight was unwelcome – it reminded him of how she had reacted to Broud, and he didn't want to have anything in common with the undisciplined man. Moreover, he was certain that she hadn't meant any harm.
"This woman regrets if she has offended the hunter," she said with meek gestures, as if to confirm his thoughts. "This woman wanted to express gratitude for teaching her and . . . and for overlooking her mistake two nights ago."
"Ayla." Zoug sighed. His anger had dissipated as quickly as it had come, which was good, since it had been unreasonable and unwarranted. "I'm not angry anymore. I was surprised. It's . . . unusual to be given furs by a woman."
Unusual, yes, but there was nothing exactly wrong with her wish to gift him the pelts. Had he not eaten the rabbits she had killed as he had visited Mog-ur's hearth? He had found no fault with the fact that it had been Ayla who had provided the meal. And nowhere in the ceremony that had made her the Woman Who Hunts had it been said that the meat and hides of her kills were acceptable to use only for women.
Zoug picked up one of the furs and ran his fingers through it; as he had expected, it was excellently cured and pleasant to the touch.
"I would be proud to wear foot-coverings made from pelts that were obtained by such a good student."
Ayla brightened immediately, the strange grimace that accompanied her happiness lighting up her entire face. Zoug found that he didn't really mind it, even if it still made him uncomfortable.
"Would the hunter like for me to make the foot coverings?" she asked eagerly.
Zoug nodded, then handed her the pelt and waved her away, watching as she rushed back into the cave. What, he mused, if he were to receive foot coverings not from a grateful student, but from his future mate? It was a pleasant thought, as pleasant as the meal at Mog-ur's hearth had been - and the idea of having Ayla around him every day at his own hearth.
Yes, Zoug decided then and there, he would take Ayla as his mate. Tonight, after the evening meal, he would go and speak with Brun.
