After my return to Denerim, a few months had gone by and still Justinia and I had yet to meet. One thing or another came up, both with her and with Denerim, and we just couldn't get our schedules to coincide.
The breeze carried the aroma of Andraste's Grace and wood smoke as I sat on a bench in front of Alistair's memorial. It was carved from granite by a dwarven mason Caden had hired for Vigil's Keep and, I had to admit, it was breathtaKing. Fifteen feet tall, smooth in places, rugged in others, it was as true to life as a stone statue could be, yet it gave me no solace. No closure. No peace.
I stared into the face, my eyes playing tricks on me as I blinked against the wind. If I squint it almost looks like he is laughing. I sighed, a pained smile tainting my lips as I shook my head. Why can't I mourn? Why can't I let myself believe he is gone and grieve?
Frustration bubbled up but suddenly I felt someone approaching so I schooled my features as they sat next to me. I turned and saw Cailan. He sat a few inches from me, looKing straight ahead with a serious expression, the tension flowing off of him in waves.
Concerned, I leaned toward him to speak, "What's wrong?". My question prompted him to glance at me. He sighed.
"What isn't wrong?" His voice low so as not to be over heard, he pulled a letter from his breast pocket and slid it across the seat to me. I took it and carefully unfolded the pages, noting the seal of the Knight Commander of Kirkwall. What the hell does she want now? Hasn't she harassed him enough about harbouring mages? I hesitantly started reading.
Your Majesty King Cailan Theirin of Ferelden,
It is with great sadness I write to you, notifying you of the atrocity that has occurred in Kirkwall just a week ago from the date of this letter.
In desperation or a fit of rage, apostates have destroyed our chantry, killing all inside and decimating part of Hightown. Our Grand Cleric, Elthina, was among the dead. I understand she is originally from Ferelden, if you could please pass this information on to those at your chantry in Denerim so her family can be notified I would greatly appreciate it.
After the explosion that destroyed the chantry our Knight Commander, Meredith Stannard, became corrupted by a strange form of red lyrium and turned on her fellow templars, forcing us to remove her from her position and eventually kill her to stop her madness. As you can imagine our city is in turmoil and in need of assistance.
I would ask for troops and building materials, any you can spare, as well as gold or some other means of trade for such materials. I understand your country is still trying to recover from the recent blight so if you cannot spare them I understand.
Thank you for your consideration.
Sincerely,
Knight Commander Cullen Rutherford
P. S. If you could, please share this with her grace, Arlessa Kora, and give her my warmest regards. Also, please tell her that no one she is familiar with was involved. Hopefully that brings her some comfort while she continues to grieve.
I released a breath I had no idea I was holding, grasping the front of my shirt as I smiled with relief. Anders didn't do it, oh thank you Maker! Then I folded up the pages and handed them back to Cailan with a grateful smile.
He returned it, but it seemed more apologetic, "You know how I want to respond," he relented, looKing down at the letter in his hand. I put my hand over his and as he looked up at me I nodded.
"We will send what we can," I asserted, "but we will not put our people in dire straights. It's what they should have done after the blight." I clenched my teeth and looked away briefly. Damn you Dumar, my only solace is that both you and Meredith will rot in hell.
"I'm glad you said that," he breathed out as he stood, looKing down at me. "You are ever so reasonable. I almost told him to piss off." Shock came over my face as I tried not to giggle.
"Cailan!" I chastised. "That's not very Kingly." He offered his hand, which I took, pulling myself to standing. He laughed, kissing the hand he still held with a little flourish.
"Maybe not, but I make up for it in other ways." His eyebrows arched up as he smirked at me teasingly. Giggling, I shook my head.
Quickly his expression slackened and he leaned in close, planting a chaste kiss on my cheekbone. My heart jumped into my throat and shock took over my face. Public affection was a statement among the nobility, a statement of intent. Cailan's intent was unknown to me, and very unexpected. With a quick bow, he spun around and walked away.
Turning suddenly, he waved at me, "And Eamon would like for all of us to have lunch before he returns to Redcliffe, I hope tomorrow is good for you?" Disappearing into his coach, I could imagine the smirk on his face. He does enjoy messing with me, and bossing me around. Maybe that's all it was.
"Of course, your Majesty," I mumbled.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Many months passed as more and more mages flooded into Denerim. Most were hiding underground, worKing with the local healers or law enforcement to help keep the peace, but others were taKing advantage of the influx of refugees, causing trouble for them and for mages in general.
I'd decided to go see Trudy one night, just to get out and hold an ear to the ground to be sure we were doing all we could to maintain some calm among the citizenry, when I was confronted by two men who I could sense were blood mages. I was, of course, armed, but I also had my abilities to fall back on, should they have managed to disarm me. Not that they could.
Smiting one and draining the mana from the other, I called for the nearby guards to take them away. I made sure to get a good look at both of their faces and take note of their specialties. Who knew if I would run into them again, our jail being full to the brim with rabble.
After returning home that evening, I finished up some paperwork in my study but then my mind strayed to the day Cailan kissed me. I knew there was nothing nefarious behind it, he's not the type, but I did hear the staff talKing about it after the fact, and ever since. So much so that I almost shouted, "Enough!", however I'd decided long ago to allow them their gossip, so I let it be. Besides, it really was a nice kiss, and it made me wonder why he hadn't brought it up since. Probably regretted it, or Eamon stepped in to make him regret it. Why does that man insist on pushing me away? What happened with Garrett, maybe? Peh, probably thinks I'm tainted or something.
Just then May brought me a letter. It had been delivered by a mysterious stranger who refused to leave without my response. Leliana had used random messengers in the past so I assumed it was from her, chastising me for leaving Orlais the way I did. With more than a little hesitation, I opened it.
Lady Theirin,
I will dispense with the pleasantries and get straight to the point.
As we have yet to meet face to face, neither by your or my direct control, this may be the only way we can communicate so I have decided to present you with my proposal in writing.
I am calling a meeting between the Templar Leaders and the Mage Leaders at the Temple of Sacred Ashes in Haven three month's time from the date of this letter. It is my greatest hope that, with oversight, everyone can come to an agreement on how to move forward and peace can be restored.
It is also, however, my greatest fear that this meeting will have the opposite effect. Therefore I am taKing steps to ensure a clear and proper response will be enforced.
Should the worst happen, my left and right hands have a copy of a writ that will enable them to call upon all of Thedas to contribute to, and support, an Inquisition. This Inquisition will be responsible for restoring peace and stamping out any influences to the contrary. I trust Leliana and Cassandra to interpret those words properly and effectively.
An Inquisition requires an Inquisitor, someone who is strong and steadfast, has a clear sense of right and wrong and can be trusted to act in the best interest of all of Thedas. Between meeting with you after the Battle of Denerim and speaKing with Leliana I believe that person is you, and I ask that you accept the position of Inquisitor, should the need arise.
Maker willing, it won't come to that, and we will all find a way to coexist. However I must take steps to ensure that peace will reign, no matter the cost.
I look forward to hearing back from you as soon as possible, my messenger will remain as long as you need.
Sincerely,
Divine Justinia V
I stared at the piece of paper in my hand as if it were a foreign object. Should the worst happen... The words echoed in my head. An Inquisition? Are things that bad? And me, the Inquisitor? I read the paragraph again, just to be sure I wasn't misinterpreting something. 'I believe that person is you'. Nope, no misinterpreting that.
"Your Grace?" May interrupted my thoughts. I looked up at my trusted friend and advisor, thinking of discussing the matter with her but then I realized she wasn't who would have the final say in the matter. That would be my King. The one who kissed me in full view of the Maker and all. He and I need to have a word anyway, no sense putting it off any longer…
"May, please wake the stables. I need a horse."
Running to my rooms to get changed, I grasped the letter in my hand, unwilling to let it out of my sight. Something told me a certain amount of secrecy was needed. Once I was dressed in my riding leathers I tucked the letter inside a small satchel and threw it over my shoulder on my way out. When I got to the stables, my horse was waiting, saddled and ready.
I ran a hand over his neck as I jumped on, "Sorry to wake you love, but it couldn't wait."
I rode hard and fast to the castle, hoping to avoid any attention or questions on the way. There were few out that late at night, most were in bed or still at the tavern, but no one stopped me as my horse displayed the seal of Denerim.
Arriving at the castle gates, I shouted up to the night guard, "Open up by decree of the Arlessa of Denerim!" When he hesitated I revealed my face, to which he gave me a shocked look and ran to the wheel that operated the gate, promptly raising it.
Once I reached the stables, I dismounted and headed quickly to the side entrance near the dining hall. I took a left, then a right, then upstairs to Cailan's private wing. No guards stopped me but a few gave me strange looks, probably because I was there so late at night but I had to speak to the King.
I came upon his room and stopped, knocking insistently. There was some rustling and someone mumbling, making me gasp in horror. He's not alone! You idiot, who knows what you interrupted. Before I could run away, the door opened to show an annoyed Cailan with an even more annoyed Eamon in the background, sitting at a table by the fire, still in his riding clothes. He must have just returned.
My relief must have shown because Cailan also smiled in relief, "Your Grace, what an unexpected pleasure! Come in," he moved aside, waving me into the room. I breezed past him as he shut the door, turning to face him and avoid Eamon's most likely still displeased expression. Cailan looked from me to Eamon, then back at me expectantly.
I took a breath and sighed, "I need to speak to you, Your Majesty." I spoke softly, my eyes gesturing toward Eamon behind me. "It's urgent." Hearing him huff, I turned to face the Arl of Redcliffe and nodded, preparing the lie, "I apologize, Your Grace, but it is extremely sensitive information that I have to share and I have been asked to keep in the strictest of confidence."
Eamon was not pleased, "What, Your Grace, could possibly be so urgent to show up at our King's bedroom door so late at night?" His arrogant tone took me off guard but I held my facade, hardening my eyes. Two can play at that game.
"With all due respect," I said through slightly gritted teeth, "I believe I was clear on the secretive nature of my visit." I walked back over to the door, opening it and gesturing toward the passage. "It is also time-sensitive, so if you'll please." He looked from me to Cailan, who gestured toward the door as well.
"In my experience, Uncle, you should just do as commanded," he nodded and Eamon hesitantly nodded back.
"Your Majesty," he responded and left the room without a glance in my direction.
More than annoyed, I slammed the door behind him and growled, "I am sorry but I am not in the mood for his arrogance tonight."
Cailan snorted out a laugh and moved to sit at the table, "Says the woman who showed up at my bedroom door in the dark of night, kicking him out."
I sighed, sitting next to him, "I know, I'm an ass, it's expected." I removed the letter from my satchel, staring down at it. "Cailan, this is big." He moved to take it from my grasp but I snatched it away, remembering what else I'd planned to discuss with him. "First, I want to know what the hell were you thinking at Alistair's memorial, kissing me in public all those months ago? And why you haven't brought it up since."
His expression went from shock to blank, telling me he was preparing what to say in his mind. So he didn't expect me to confront him on it? How well does this man know me? I watched as the gears turned behind his eyes.
His mouth opened then immediately shut as he shook his head, "I'm…" He sighed and looked away.
I took his hand in mine, "Look at me." He slowly complied and I nodded toward him. "Tell me."
He ran his free hand through his hair as he looked toward the fire, "It's complicated."
I laughed, "Shocker!"
He looked back at me, smiling, "Brat."
Leering at him, I shook my head, "Tell me."
Another big sigh and the King decided to just spill, "So you know how Eamon and the rest of the nobility have been pressuring me to marry…"
I nodded, "Yes, but I thought you were working with Celene to find a solution to align Orlais with Ferelden?". I watched as his expression went from contemplative to that of a child caught with their hand in the cookie jar.
He rubbed his eyes with his free hand, pinching the bridge of his nose, "That… didn't work out as well as I'd hoped." I sat back in my chair, releasing his hand and waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Still waiting, I chewed my lip for a second then nodded, "Ok, so long story short, who was involved and what happened?"
Cailan looked at me out of the corner of his eye then back at the fire, "Celene suggested her cousin, Florianne. We met and…" His hands flew up, drooping back onto the arms of his seat as he shook his head. "She's an ass, love."
An unladylike snort escaped my face so I slapped my hand over it, "Peh! You didn't know that already?" I looked at him incredulously as he smirked at me sideways.
Turning to face me, he shook his head, "I was willing, worse came to worse I could take a lover. I certainly didn't expect the response from her brother."
I laughed, remembering the hulking warmonger that was Grand Duke Gaspard, "Talk about 'ass', it must run in the family."
Cailan leaned an elbow on the back of his chair, turning to face me fully, "He insisted on this 'marital contract' that, among a great many other idiotic things, forbids me from sleeping with anyone but her. Blech." Shaking his head, he wrinkled his nose. "Orlesians and their need to be in control. I'm a King, not a low born nobleman with no spine."
Trying to stay on topic, I shook my head, "So that stunt you pulled was to get the nobles off your back? Make them think you were courting me?" A lump formed in my throat, unbidden, so I tried to swallow it down. Maker, I hope this isn't going where I think it is, I'm not sure I'm ready.
I knew that, being an Arlessa, the crown had the authority to force me to marry. Marriage was honestly a good idea, especially for my Arling. It would give me the opportunity to have more children and, should Cailan not marry or have children of his own, Duncan could take his place as the next in line. He was the only Theiren heir at the moment and Cailan seemed content with that.
The problem was that would leave Denerim up for grabs when I passed, which was not ideal. It could start another civil war, depending on who showed interest and how determined they were to take the position. It really was better for everyone if I married again…
But how could I? I'd thought about it, many times, and every time I came to the same conclusion. I would have to force myself to have relations with someone just to have a child, and not just one. I would need at least two in order to ensure the Arling was safe.
The next question was who would I marry? Garrett's family was out, with the lies and deceit there was no way Cailan would go for that. The Howe's weren't an option either, Nathaniel had become a Warden and Thomas was presumed dead, not that I would accept him. He is too much like his father. There were other families, other men, but…
There was always a 'but'. I couldn't get past it, no matter what I told myself the bottom line was that none of them were Alistair and he was gone. Gone for over a year and, oddly enough, a year is all a woman is expected to mourn. I had to wonder if Justinia timed it that way.
Cailan shook his head, "Not exactly." His eyes locked onto mine, their dark blue deepening the longer I stared. I waited, wondering what he could be thinking, when he took my hand. "I apologize, I should have discussed this with you before doing anything else".
He took a long, deep breath and leveled a look at me that brokered no interruption, "You are the only person in Thedas I know I can trust. You are the only person who doesn't have an agenda, who wouldn't do anything to hurt my standing and would do anything to keep Ferelden safe. I don't feel I have any other choice, so…
"I want you to be my wife."
