Author's Note: So my world has turned completely chaotic and I am working insane hours. However that doesn't mean that I won't be continuing with my story, believe me it's my only sanity at this point. It just means that my updating schedule is going to reflect the chaos in my life. So please bear with me and happy reading!

Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars. Never have, never will. I simply play in their world.

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"You touched me and stole my thoughts.

You kissed me and stole my breath.

You looked into my eyes and stole my dreams.

You felt my skin and stole my body.

You spilled your words and stole my heart.

You filled me up in a way I've never known.

Built me,

Mended me,

Took me over.

And I willing gave every ounce,

Every inch.

Itching to belong,

Tucked in your arms,

Safe and sound.

You saw my soul,

I gave you myself."

-Author Unknown.

Kylo Ren

Her mouth falls on mine like rain, drowning and reviving me in equal measure. The bands in her hair break beneath my grip, warm silk falling over my skin.

The scent of midnight flowers fills the air and I am drunk on the pleasure it brings me.

Our mouths collide and she is the very air I breathe. Each time she pulls away, she takes the breath from my lungs.

"Rey."

She gasps, trembling in my arms, liquid eyes staring up at me through feathered lashes.

"Ben."

That name is like a catalyst and words swell between us, a torrent of emotions pulled from all the hidden places inside of me and echoed back in her.

"I heard you crying out for me..."

"I was drowning in the desert..."

I hear the remnants of fright, see the shadows in glowing amber.

I still remember the taste of that fear crawling through my bones as I called out for her again and again and met only silence.

I take her back into my arms, drowning myself in the feeling of her warm and alive and here with me.

Her mouth parts willingly beneath mine, her arms wrapped around me in a tight embrace as her body fits perfectly against mine.

Too long. It's been too long since I've felt her like this in my arms.

Soft, needy sounds that only I can elicit. Her fingers digging into my hair, making silent demands that I am more than willing to obey.

Her mouth ravages my soul, pushing back the darkness and I feel like I've stumbled into a dream of another's making.

One where I am allowed this much joy.

To feel...loved.

She pulls her mouth away, taking in gulps of air, her chest heaving.

But her arms locked around me as if she will never let me go.

As if she were afraid that I would somehow disappear.

I bury my face in the sweet scent of her skin, undone by the simple knowledge that she still wants me.

After everything we've done to each other, said to each other...she is still the one thing in this cold galaxy that I can call my own.

My only solace.

Her fingers disengage from my hair, trailing down my face and I lift my head to look down at her.

Soft, limpid eyes of impossible beauty staring up at me.

She has that same look from so long ago...our first night together when I told her...I loved her.

"I thought...I thought I would never see you again..."

Her words shatter what is left of my soul, sorrow and aching tenderness wrapped in her voice.

"I thought I had lost you...," I died in that hour I couldn't reach her, couldn't feel her, "I was desperate to find you..."

"Ben..."

Does she understand what she's doing to me? Is she even aware that she is speaking my name with a lover caress?

I swear I can see that faint glimmer in her eyes...something that I once had...her love.

I am terrified that what I see is of my own desperate yearning simply reflecting back at me.

She wants me...but does she love me still?

I close my eyes, the impossibility of it all crashing over me and I lean against her. The simple contact of touching her my anchor in this storm.

My heart pushes against my ribs, frantically trying to break free.

To go back where it belongs, in the palm of her hands. Where she has always held it.

"I've missed you Rey."

The words slip free and I don't regret them. Because it is true. I've missed everything about her. The bright spark of her laughter, the kiss of her intellect when she tosses me a challenge, her delight in the simple beauty that other's take for granted.

All of it.

She is my first thought when I wake and the last when I sleep. There is not a moment that doesn't go by that I don't want to reach for her, to share everything that I do...with her.

Calloused fingers glide over my jaw, cupping my face in a tender grip.

"I've missed you too Ben."

I hear the ache of loneliness in that soft confession, a thread of vulnerability that sets my heart trembling and steals my will.

She has me. I will always belong to her, until every star in the galaxy fades to nothing but a distant memory, I am hers.

Our lips meet and I gentle my touch. My craving for her has not abated but I want her willing participation, not the mindless chaos that passed between us earlier.

I want to know that she is here with me, choosing to stay in my arms.

Her mouth opens, the tip of tongue touching mine as her fingers stroke my skin, setting the lightning free in my blood.

Her sigh, that soft surrender, is all I wanted to hear and I indulge the both of us.

I sip at her mouth, drinking the sounds of her pleasure stealing from her lips.

My fingers find the edge of her tunic, warm silken skin beneath my questing hand and her sighs quickly turn whimpers.

How I have missed this side of her.

"Ben," a ragged gasp that sounds like my name as I stroke her heated flesh, my lips following the slim column of her throat.

"Ben..."

Her hands leave my face to fumble with the clasp of my cloak, a frustrated noise when it refuses to release.

She is quite adorable when she's like this and I lift my lips from her neck to reclaim her mouth as my fingers find the hollow dip at the base of her spine.

Her tongue dances with mine, laying to waste all of my good intentions of taking this slow.

The heavy weight of my cloak falls from my shoulders when her fingers find the clasp, a hum of satisfaction on her lips.

Her roaming hands find the edge of my armor, her intent clear.

I cannot help but delight in her obvious need, it matches my own.

However I have no intention of taking her on my workbench. I want her in my bed.

Now.

"Rey," I pull away long enough to form a coherent thought, "we should..."

BEEP...BEEP...BEEP...

My private comm shatters the silence and I grab onto Rey when she nearly topples from the bench I've pressed her up on.

I slam my hand against the hidden access panel, silencing the damn thing.

"What?"

I gave specific orders to not be disturbed for anything. Whoever disregarded that order has just signed away their career if not their life.

Nothing short of a full-scale revolt is going to make me leave Rey and even then I am not certain that would be enough of an incentive.

"S-Supreme Leader...forgive the intrusion," not likely as Second Lieutenant Mohir is about to learn, "...b-but the Allegiant General is requesting your presence in the conference room."

A soft huff, almost like laughter next to my ear and I focus back on Rey.

A sweep of color high across her cheekbones and her lips, swollen from my ardent attention, are twitching with suppressed amusement.

"I am interrogating the scavenger," I focus on her mouth and everything that I want to do to her comes to the forefront of my mind, "General Pryde can wait."

Her eyes widen, teeth catching her lip and I barely hold back a groan as lust grabs me by the throat.

Is she trying to destroy the last of my control?

"Supreme Leader, my sincerest apologies but I'm afraid I must insist."

Pryde, once more overriding my orders to suit his purpose and some of the fire is doused in my blood.

Not at his words but seeing Rey pale at the sound of his voice.

That playful tug of her lips, the spark of amusement from earlier is wiped away.

She is no longer my laughing, eager lover.

Damn Pryde and his scheming mind.

"Explain yourself General. Now."

"I took the liberty of assembling the senior staff since we have the emperor's scavenger in hand," a pause and I hear a note of discontent when he continues, "the Night Buzzard has left a transmission that only you may access."

The emperor's scavenger he calls her.

Ap'lek contacting me. He's found Dameron and Finn and the rest of the Falcon's crew.

Once more the war for the soul of the galaxy driving a wedge between us.

I close my eyes and for a fraction of a second I don't want to be Kylo Ren. I don't want to be the Supreme Leader, responsible for hundreds of thousands of lives.

To decide who lives and who dies so that balance can come back to the galaxy and peace restored.

A mad impulse pounding in my temple to take Rey and just run. To leave the lives we've led up until now far behind us.

To just decide the fate of our own two lives between us.

But the impulse dies even as it forms. Rey would never consent to simply abandoning her friends in lieu of her own happiness.

I learned that bitter lesson on Emphameira.

She is warm next to my side, a living, breathing light that has the power to chase the shadows from my soul.

But it is the cold I need now if I am to deal with Pryde and the rest of the Council.

Gritting my teeth I pull my arm away from her and set her back on her feet.

As much as I want to stay here, to be held in her arms, there is a war waiting to be won. I cannot rest until I see this through to the end.

"I'm on my way."

The comm goes silent and yet I stand here, eyes closed. I don't know what look is on Rey's face at this moment but I know that what passed between us seconds ago has changed.

Why is it whenever I find happiness, a moment of blessed peace, it is snatched away from me.

Is this my fate then to find happiness but never hold onto it?

Is that the destiny of all men who become monsters?

"You," lilting words spoken in a quivering voice that arrest my attention and force my eyes open, "should go. They're waiting for you."

She sounds as bitter as I feel. As if she wanted this to last longer between us.

There is a part of me that wishes she would ask me to stay, to not leave her side.

If only she...but it foolish to allow myself to believe that she would ever ask that of me.

It is even more foolish to keep hoping that one day I might hear those words.

"We'll finish talking when I return."

I don't know what Pryde is up to but I intend to make this meeting short and to the point. He will learn that I dictate the actions of the First Order.

Not him and certainly not that abomination of a man back on Exegol.

I feel a flicker against my soul, a flash of amusement coming from Rey.

"Is that what we were doing just now?" a sensual purr in her voice that wraps around me, making it hard for me to concentrate, "Talking?"

She lifts a delicate, arched brow at me as if challenging me to contradict her words.

Her mouth looks bruised and I can see the red mark on her neck when I pressed my lips to her skin.

Traces of my desire still vivid and I clench my fist in an effort not to simply take her to my bed and have done with this madness still echoing in my blood.

"I will finish what we started Rey."

Her eyes dilate and I see lust darken amber to swirling topaz. The madness that lives in me is also alive inside her as well.

"Is that how you speak to all your prisoners?"

A sharp bite to her words that wasn't present before and I dislike the connotations she is making.

I lean down and pick up my cloak, giving it a quick shake before settling it back into place. The action allows my head to clear a little more of just images of alabaster skin drenched in moonlight.

"You are not my prisoner," I look at Rey and she regards me with a wariness I tire of seeing in her eyes and slip back to her side, cupping her face so that she can look into mine and know that I am not lying, "you are my guest."

"Does that mean I'm free to leave?"

Soft words hiding the dagger between my ribs. She asks questions she already knows the answer to but forces me to speak regardless.

I drop my hand from her face and go back to my workbench, picking up my gloves.

"No."

The mask is where I left it and I find that I am reluctant to put it back on.

Strange, there was a time where I never wanted to take it off.

To reveal the man behind the mask.

"A 'guest' is allowed to leave," her words wash over me, biting with anger, "I'm a prisoner," I turn to look at her but she has turned her back on me, her head slightly bowed, "even if my cage doesn't appear like one."

Despite the anger evident she cannot hide the sadness that seeps into her voice.

Is that how she feels, that I am trapping her in a cage?

I'm already moving to her side, resting my hand on her shoulder. She does not shrug it away and that gives me a small measure of hope for us.

"You are my permanent guest."

She lifts her head and I want to tell her that when she is Empress, the galaxy will be hers. She will never feel trapped or alone again.

Such vulnerable eyes, they speak so clearly of her confusion and the shadows in them are not of pain...but exhaustion.

Despite my gloves I can feel the gentle warmth of her skin as I allow myself one last touch.

"I...Ben?"

"I can feel your exhaustion grinding your bones," she worries about everyone else yet seems to forget about her own well being, "you didn't truly believe you could hide it from me?"

If she cannot remember to take care of herself then I will gladly take on that task.

She needs to be reminded that her life also has value even is she chooses not to treat it so.

The flare of heat deepens across her face and she lowers her lashes, veiling her eyes from my sight.

It doesn't matter.

The cadence of her breathing changes, her pulse turns tremulous as I continue to caress her face.

Her body speaks all the words she dares not utter and quiet pleasure settles into my bones.

"Get some rest," considering everything that has happened I doubt she has regained her strength, "stay in this room."

Until the emperor is dealt with permanently and her place at my side unquestioned I don't want her roaming freely.

Her eyes snap open, amber and topaz flaring brightly as she steps out of my arms, a frown tugging at her lips.

"Still trying to give me orders?"

I shake my head at her obstinate nature. Only she would see my concern for her well-being as an order.

"I prefer to think of it as sound advice," I adjust my glove back into place and apply my next words to her practical side, "unless you like feeling weak?"

Her eyes narrow at me in unmistakable annoyance and again I feel that tickle in the back of my throat.

How I have missed this.

But I can't linger or Pryde will send someone to 'fetch' me, as if I were an errant child in need of herding.

Pushing aside those last traces of reluctance I reach for my mask, once more donning the uniform of the Supreme Leader.

From the corner of my vision I see Rey stumble away from my workstation, a look of horror etched into her eyes as she darts them away from the blade, her skin ashen.

She is quick to turn away as if the very sight revolted her.

Yet Vicrul found it on her.

Next to the dagger is her...our...saber and I clip it to my belt.

I will be gone for some indeterminable time, better not tempt her into doing something rash if left lying around.

"I'm curious as to how you obtained a Sith dagger."

Especially since I have observed just how abhorrent the artifact is to her.

Seconds pass and I wonder if she will look at me before I have to leave but my worries are unfounded when she turns to face me.

Her own 'mask' is back in place. That of the Jedi. Calm, centered and distant.

"I'm sure you are."

Cool words, hands on her hips and steel in her gaze.

That is my warrior Empress.

"Remember what I said," I wouldn't put it past Rey to try and sneak out of her for a 'look around' as it were, "Stay in this room."

Where I know you are safe.

Where I know I can come back to you.

I turn from her before I lose my resolve and head for the door.

"I don't need you to remind-hey!"

Her clipped words are cut off when I snap the door the shut, Force-locking it for good measure.

"You did not just lock me in here!

Her voice might be muffled but there is no mistaking her flair of temper.

The crash of her palm hitting metal is also unmistakable.

"I'm not going to forget this Ben."

No I suspect she won't but it's not forever and she'll forgive me.

Eventually. I've tasted her temper before, I know how to work around it.

I move towards Vicrul who is on guard at the end of the all, making certain no one enters.

"Remain here."

"Master my place is at your side."

"Are you questioning my orders Vicrul?"

Vicrul drops to his knee before me.

"No Master Ren. So long as you lead, the Knight of Ren will follow."

"Then do as I command. Stay here and make certain no one enters."

Vicrul on his feet, his arms cross before him.

"It will be as you desire."

"You will be rejoining your brethren shortly Vicrul."

"I look forward to the hunt Master Ren."

I choke the impulse to look behind me, to gaze at the door knowing that Rey is only a few feet away.

The sooner I deal with the Council, the quicker I can return to her side.

I turn from my Knight and make my way through the ship, the layout a familiar one.

"Lord Ren what is your progress?"

Putrid evil in my mind, the scent of miasma and decay filtering in despite the mask.

Palpatine. Reaching for me from the shadow of Exegol just to prove that he can find me at any given moment.

Perhaps this is only coincidence but I think not.

"I've secured the scavenger, she is aboard the Steadfast."

"Well done my boy," years of serving under Snoke, of the memories of my mother speaking to other diplomats serve me well now, "it seems I was correct when I named you the heir to Vader. But be wary, Lord Ren, Jedi are cunning creatures. Do not trust the pretty facade, she means to destroy you in the end."

Now how would Palpatine know what Rey looks like? I bury the question before it can surface and catch his attention.

"I have the matters well in hand."

"Good, good. I expect to see you in Exegol shortly."

"I have one other loose end to clean up and we will be on our way."

"Do not tarry, Lord Ren. I do not like to be kept waiting."

Sterile air filtering through, the lingering stink of rot and miasma quickly clearing away. No longer do I feel his crawling malice inside my mind, looking for the secrets I keep buried out of sight.

I shake my head slightly to clear my mind of the last vestiges of his touch. Bile in the back of my throat and I swallow the nausea after such contact.

Only when I feel centered do I continue.

The conference room is on the far end of the ship, well away from my personal quarters. My generals and their staff are already assembled when I arrive.

They get to their feet as soon as I enter the room and Pryde quickly steps forward.

"Supreme Leader, welcome." A twist of his thin lips, "I was about to send someone to inquire after you. I trust all is well?"

"Enough of your pleasantries General. Sit, all of you."

I take to my chair at the head of the table and the others follow suite.

I steeple my fingers as I overlook those who have attended this meeting. Everyone is present save General Hux.

Either he is still incapacitated or my Stormtroopers actually disposed of him.

I would much prefer the latter but somehow I doubt that is the case.

"Now that we have the scavenger," Pryde begins with his opening gambit, "our first course of action should be to inform the Emperor."

A murmur around the table, nods of consent from the Council and for a moment I see the flash of triumph in Pryde's gaze.

He must be envisioning himself contacting Palpatine with the news and earning the mad emperor's favor in return.

"He already knows Allegiant General."

Heads turn in my direction, the rise and fall of conversation ceasing immediately.

I hear the sound of leather against steel as Pryde grips his swaggerstick.

"Supreme Leader, you've been in contact with the emperor?"

Admiral Griss. I wondered if he would stand by Pryde as he tried to usurp my position.

"Indeed Admiral. Is it my authority you question or my ability to secure a single, untried Jedi?"

A dull flush of color across his dark skin and he has the good sense to lower his gaze from my direction.

"No one here questions your ability or your authority, Supreme Leader. Your commitment to the First Order is an inspiration to all who serve you."

General Engell, her clear voice carrying across the room and I nod my head in her direction. Among all my general's, Engell is one of the few who has stood with me rather than against me.

"Well said," General Parnadee tipping her head to her fellow general, "Supreme Leader what is our next move? Are we shifting the fleet to Exegol to meet up with the Sith Eternal and begin our final assault?"

"There is one more matter to clean up General before we can make and end of this war."

I tap the datascreen at my fingertips, pulling up the restricted message sent by the Night Buzzard.

Ap'lek has left it encoded. Only one trained as a Knight of Ren can decipher it.

I tap in the sequence, unlocking the message as his holographic form appears directly in front of me.

"Lord Ren, our quarry has been spotted in Kijimi City near the Thieve's Quarter. Our spies report Dameron and the traitor Finn in the company of Zorii Bliss. Awaiting further orders."

"You sent your Knights to Kijimi Supreme Leader? Why was I not made aware of this fact?"

"My Knights answer only to me Allegiant General. I gave them a specific task and they have now completed that task."

"What task was that Supreme Leader?"

Commander Trach, a young officer who shows a promise of leadership to come.

"They have located the missing crew of the Falcon who escaped on a ship, the Bestoon."

A look of concentration on General Parnadee when I mention that name.

"Sir, are you referring to Ochi of Bestoon?"

"Yes. You seem familiar with the name General. Tell me what you know."

"Ochi of Bestoon was affiliated with the Old Empire, a well-known assassin who served the Sith exclusively."

A crease forming between her eyebrows as if trying to remember something.

"There were rumors that he dealt with Sith artifacts but nothing was confirmed. He disappeared after the fall of the Empire and the apparent death of Emperor Palpatine."

"But why Kijimi?" Again Trach speaking up, "what value could be had there? It is a planet of thieves and murders, lawless and without a proper governing body."

"It has no value," Pryde cutting in, "merely a ploy to delay our forces. Chasing after them is a waste of our resources. We should move directly on to Exegol and plan our assault."

"Dameron and Finn have with them the protocol droid C-Threepio who has knowledge of a second wayfinder."

Pryde turns his focus to me and for once I've caught him off guard. He cannot hide his look of surprise at my revelation.

"A second wayfinder Supreme Leader? Are you implying that the Resistance is looking for a path to Exegol, just as you did?"

"That is exactly what they are doing, General Pryde. As Command Trach pointed out, Kijimi is an underbelly world. They will need someone with skills enough to hack into the memory of the protocol droid and retrieve the information."

"But why Supreme Leader?" Engell calling out to me, "the droid would simply tell them the information."

"He cannot, General, because the location is written in Sith runes and are a proscribed language to all but a Sith."

"Forgive me, Supreme Leader, but how do you know all of this?"

Pryde again and I grow tired of his interruptions.

"Before you summoned me I was in the middle of interrogations. The scavenger had in her possession a Sith artifact that tells the exact location of the second wayfinder."

Pryde snaps his mouth shut, his thin lips a harsh line across his weathered features.

Now I have the undivided attention of my generals.

"General Pryde you will take the Maldictus to Exegol. Admiral Griss, take the Dream Snatcher and join the Allegiant General to begin final preparations. General Parnadee, I want the Invictus, Equalizer and Incinerator to remain behind."

"Sir, shouldn't we take all of our Star Destroyers to Exegol? Without them-"

"The rest of the galaxy will rise against our forces if they believe we are retreating," I cut in over Admiral Griss, "I want those Destroyers over Coruscant, Madalore and Naboo. When the final battle begins, those three will be the first to send aide to the Resistance."

"A fine plan Supreme Leader but might I inquire what you will be doing in the interm?"

For once I hear actual respect in Pryde when he addresses me.

"The Steadfast will rendezvous at Kijimi. I want Dameron and the rest of his crew in custody before we proceed to Exegol."

"Is that...wise? I know they seek the wayfinder but surely such an endeavor is futile."

"General Organa," I tell him softly and watch him flinch slightly at my tone, "would not have sent the one person she trusts to lead the Resistance on a 'futile' mission. We stop Dameron and we cripple the Resistance. Is that clear Allegiant General?"

"Perfectly. We will begin preparations immediately."

The generals begin speaking of plans but my attention is elsewhere.

A whisper in the back of my mind, a sense of unease as my stomach tightens in response.

It's Rey.

I reach for her mind, find that she's deep in slumber and plagued by nightmares that are channeling her emotions down through our bond.

A sense of rot and malice also flowing through the bond and my temper slips the leash.

Palpatine attempting to get to Rey in her most vulnerable state.

I'm on my feet and the conversation grinds to a halt around me.

"Continue with your preparations, I am needed elsewhere. General Pryde I leave the rest to you."

"As you command. Might I inquire as to the nature-"

"No, you may not. Commander Trach give the order to have the Steadfast converge on Kijimi. Do not disturb me until the planet is in view."

"Yes Supreme Leader."

I am aware of my generals watching me but I have no more time to waste on them. I have told them my plans now all they need is to carry out my orders.

It was time to get back to where I truly belong.

With Rey.