A/N: Fair warning, this chapter mentions attempted cutting, and depression. Don't like, don't read.

Chapter 15

Depressed with the D.A.

Ivy's POV

That bastard Malfoy went way too far. Because of him, my normally, happy, bubbly, talkative best friend was reduced to a quiet, sad and distant version of herself!

She took to sitting at the Gryffindor Table and with the Gryffindors during lessons. She couldn't face sitting at the Slytherin Table with that git there.

Nothing we thought of could make her smile. Not even when Fred had dyed Drosie's hair green and silver again. No, that made her feel worse. Reminded her of Malfoy and when she told him in second year about the same thing.

Drosie even was worried. And that was saying a lot, because she wasn't Hannah's biggest fan. Normally, she'd crack a joke at her expense and Hannah would snap back a retort about her being a Muggleborn…but after that day…nothing!

She wasn't even eating anything! Damn it, she just sat there…reading my stupid aunt's course book! UMBRIDGE'S COURSE BOOK!

Speaking of Umbridge, she had caught all those people in Hogsmeade in the Hog's Head pub…and now all clubs were banned…that didn't help Hannah's mood much…at least until her Captain, some seventh year, went and got permission for the Slytherin team to practice…the Gryffindor team not too far behind.

Harry was shitting kittens. He wanted his little sister back…and as soon as possible.

I had a whole new reason for loathing Malfoy's guts…he freaking broke my best friend.

Or did he?

A whole week after Malfoy dumped Hannah in that horrible way, Hermione came up to me and Hannah during lunch, where Han, as usual, refused to eat anything.

"Hey!" Hermione said cheerfully, sitting down.

Hannah just nodded and I smirked "Hey, what's got the Bookworm so happy?"

Mione smirked "Well, Harry found a place to do Hannah's Defence Lessons!"

At this, Hannah's eyes just lit up and she stood straighter. "Really?!" she said enthusiastically.

Mione nodded "Yeah. Dobby told him. Want to find a time where everyone should meet?"

Hannah nodded "Tonight." she said, beaming as she peeled a banana and bit into it. "Tonight at seven. Tell everyone on that parchment. Oh, this will be so exciting!"

I smiled brightly. My best friend was back! And she was eating!

At least…until Malfoy came into the Hall.

Hannah just stood up, took her book bag and dagger and walked out, silent as a church mouse as if Hermione's good news was never delivered.

Hannah's POV

I was thrilled that Harry had found a place where I could rebel against Umbitch…who was the root cause for my depression…but…I still missed that sarcastic blond.

I went into Moaning Myrtle's bathroom and shut the door, looking into the only whole mirror and stared at myself in it.

Look at you! I thought to myself. What was Draco thinking when he asked you out? Scarlett's way prettier than you are…I mean, look at her…she has blonde hair, yours is a pathetic black! What girl do you know with long, black hair?

And look how short you are! Scarlett's taller than five foot two, she's almost five foot seven! Not to mention how thin she is compared to you. Yeah, Draco deserves Scarlett a lot more than some short stack. I mean, come on! He had to get on his knees to bite your neck the way he did!

I looked in the mirror again…and I hated what I saw. Black hair, metallic blue eyes…that pathetic scar on my neck! That was probably what drove Draco off…that bloody eyesore!

I took out my dagger in anger at myself and sat on the bathroom floor, putting the blade near my wrist.

I paused…Pathetic. I thought angrily to myself Just pathetic! The Great Hannah Potter resorting to cutting herself because of a break-up! What would your brother say?

I thought about it, looking down at the blade and my wrist, trying to decide if it was worth it.

"Screw this crap." I said, taking the dagger and bringing it down on my wrist to slash it.

"Stop!" someone said, running into the bathroom and taking my dagger out of my hand before I could bring it down on my wrist "What the hell d'you think you're doing?!"

I creased my eyebrows together. I knew that voice from somewhere…but I didn't know from where exactly until I looked up.

It was Seamus Finnegan.

"What do you want?" I demanded, trying to reach up for my dagger.

"Well, I was walking down to the library to get a book for that Potions' assignment we have when I saw the door opened a crack and you about to cut yourself!" Seamus snapped, holding my dagger up out of my reach "What the hell are you on?"

"Nothing!" I snapped angrily. "Can't a girl decide to cut herself in peace in this school without her stupid brother's dorm mate trying to stop her?"

"Uh, no?" Seamus said "Because cutting's the coward's way out."

"You calling me a coward, Finnegan?" I demanded, trying to reach up for my dagger again.

"If the boot fits, wear it." Finnegan said, glaring down at me.

We just stayed like that for another couple of minutes before I sighed "Ok, you're right. I'm a…a coward." I admitted.

Finnegan smirked "Good. Here's your dagger back." he said, handing me it and sitting on the floor, patting the spot next to him for me.

I sat down, a little shy.

"So…" he said, tapping his legs "what put you under the impression that cutting was a good idea?"

I shrugged. "I don't know." I said after a minute "I just caught my ex snogging another girl and…" I cut myself off with a stray tear.

Seamus handed me a tissue "That sucks." he said simply.

I took the tissue off him "Thanks." I said, wiping my eyes. "It's just…it's…so hard!" I said upset.

Seamus nodded "I know. Me dad is a Muggle…and Mam didn't tell him she was a witch until after they were married…and Mam was pregnant with me. It was so big a shock for him, he left me mam for a while before I was born. Me mum was crushed." he finished, running a hand through his sandy hair.

I blinked "That's so low!" I said "Nobody should have to go through that, especially not pregnant!" I said sympathetically.

Seamus shrugged "Yeah. It sucked for Mam. But she was overjoyed when he came back, the day before I was born, with apologies coming out the bum. Mam took him back, and her excitement was what caused me to be born."

I shrugged "Yeah…your mum's lucky." I said sadly. "I doubt that Draco will take me back." I said, feeling a tear fall down my face.

"Hey, hey." Seamus said, wrapping an arm around me "None of that, now. I guess that was the wrong thing to say."

I smiled "Thanks for trying, though." I said.

Seamus started laughing "If you want I could always…" he started laughing so hard he couldn't breathe.

"What?" I asked, somewhat nervous that my companion would choke.

"I could always blow Malfoy's wardrobe up. I've got a rather…obsession…with pyrotechnics."

I nodded and laughed "Yeah, I remember with your feather from first year. You blew it up while-"

"We were trying to levitate it!" we said together, bursting out laughing.

I grabbed my side and sighed "You know, Finnegan, I haven't laughed so hard in days."

Seamus chuckled and shook his head "God, call me Seamus, Potter."

I smirked "I seem to get that a lot." I say "I called…a certain someone by their surname, then called him by his first name up until now…then I called Hermione 'Granger' for a time until she told me to call her Hermione…and now you." I said, crossing my arms and sighing.

Seamus smirked "Well, what can I say? I hate being called by my last name."

I smirked "Me too. Call me Hannah, damn it!" I said, bursting out laughing and making Seamus do the same.

Seamus sighed for the second time that afternoon "You know, I don't see why Malfoy dumped you…or slapped you for that matter. You're a pretty fun girl."

I smiled "Thanks." I said shyly, biting my lip.

"Hey, remember that one time in Lockhart's room?" Seamus asked, turning to me "With the Cornish Pixies?"

I laughed "Oh, yeah! And we both burst out laughing at the same time!"

Seamus snickered "I still think the ass was a fake."

I nodded "Yeah. Me too."

Seamus sneered "But I think we're better off with him than this Umbridge woman."

I nodded. "Me…too." I said slowly.

"I also heard you caught Malfoy snogging Zimmerman." Seamus said, becoming serious.

I nodded "Yeah…" I said sadly.

"I don't see why. Zimmerman's ugly." Seamus admitted "You're much better looking."

I blushed, not having heard a compliment from a boy in days "Thanks." I said shyly.

Seamus and I looked at each other for a while before I realized something.

"Oh!" I said shooting up "You hate Umbridge, right?" I asked.

Seamus nodded "Yeah?" he asked.

"Well, don't tell anyone…but we're going to have secret practical DADA lessons!" I whispered excitedly "The first one's tonight…you want in?"

Seamus creased his eyebrows together "Is your brother going to be there?" he asked coldly.

I nodded "Yeah…but don't worry, this is all my idea." I checked my watch "CRAP! I gotta be there now!" I said starting out, before turning to Seamus "You coming?" I asked.

Seamus sat there for a moment before standing up "Yeah…I guess I'm in."

I beamed "Well, come on, then!" I said, waiting for Seamus before taking out the parchment Hermione gave to Ivy to give to me.

Seamus and I walked up to the seventh floor corridor, where Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ivy were waiting, Harry pacing around a wall.

"Hi, everyone!" I said cheerfully as I walked over.

Ivy's eyes lit up, Hermione beamed happily, Ron looked dazed and Harry glared at me, than at Seamus.

"Hi, Hannah!" Ron, Hermione and Ivy said together happily.

"What's he doing here!?" Harry demanded, jerking a thumb at Seamus.

"Seamus is with me, Harry." I said simply as suddenly a door appeared where I originally thought was just wall. "LOOK!"

Harry turned and smirked "That's a good thing." he said before opening the door and going in, Hermione, Ron and Ivy going after him and Seamus and I after them.

The room was huge and lit with torches like in the dungeons were. There were bookcases lining the walls and large silk cushions on the floor. There was a bunch of strange instruments in a shelf on the back of the room.

"Secrecy Sensors." Seamus told me. "And that mirror thing is a Foe-Class."

I pointed to the one Secrecy Sensors that I recognized…a Sneakoscope, which Ron gave to Harry for his thirteenth birthday.

Hermione took a book and a cushion and sat down to read as a knock came to the door. Ivy went to answer it.

"I'll be the doorman!" Ivy said proudly, opening the door for Ginny, Neville, Lavender and Dean Thomas.

"Dean!" Seamus said, going over to high five his best friend.

"Hey, Shea!" Dean said, refusing to leave Seamus hanging "I see you were wheeling the latest guest of Malfoy's Heartbreak Hotel."

Seamus and I glared "Shut up, Dean!" we said together.

"Like Hannah would want to be in a relationship with me after what happened." Seamus said, rolling his eyes "Honestly, Dean."

I smirked as more people came in (Willow and her friends coming in to give me a big hug…must have heard about me and Draco)…and by the time eight o'clock arrived, every single cushion was occupied, every one sitting on one…but me.

"Oi!" Fred said, waving to me "Plenty of cushion over here, Han!"

I smirked and gave Seamus a "See you later!" before turning to Fred "Love to, Freddie, but I'm heading this." I said standing next to Harry.

Harry cleared his throat and silence fell.

I cleared my own throat and began "Ok!" I shouted at the couple of second year girls gossiping happily in the back, who immediately fell silent "I was thinking of what we should start with first and - What, Hermione?"

"I think we should elect a leader." Hermione said simply.

"I nominate Hannah!" Willow said, standing up and putting her hand in the air "This was her idea!"

I beamed and went cherry red.

"I second Hannah's nomination!" Seamus said, putting his hand in the air.

"I nominate Harry!" Cho Chang said, raising her hand and glaring at Willow, making me glare at her.

"Hey, it was Hannah's idea for this, Chang, so I'd watch it!" Willow snapped, glaring back at Cho.

I beamed "I say Harry and I both be leader." I said.

"You more! This was your idea!" Willow said.

I blushed as Ivy looked to everyone "Ok, all in favour of Hannah being our leader and Harry being vice-leader?"

Everyone put up their hand, Willow's going straightest into the air.

I went cherry red and Harry flushed "Uh…thanks." we said together.

"Ok, back to what I was saying - What, Hermione?" I asked, turning back to Hermione.

Hermione beamed "I think we should also have a name. Promote a feeling of team spirit and unity, you know what I mean?"

"How about the Anti-Umbridge League?" Angelina Johnson suggested hopefully.

"Or the Ministry of Magic are Morons Group?" Fred suggested, making me giggle.

"I think we should call it TSTSTUIABASBRCU." I said proudly.

Everyone gave me a look.

I started giggling "It stands for The Society That States That Umbridge Is A Bitch And Should Be Re-Christened Umbitch."

Everyone laughed with me and Ivy applauded. "I second that idea!" Ivy said, pointing to me.

Hermione frowned. "I was thinking something along the lines of a name that wasn't obvious to everyone what we're up to, so we can talk about it outside of meetings."

"How about the Defence Association?" Chang said "Or the DA for short, so we can talk about it outside of meetings."

I smirked. "I hate to say it, Chang, but the DA sounds good."

"Only let's make it stand for Dumbledore's Army, because that is the Ministry's biggest fear, isn't it?" Ginny said, nodding along with me.

Hermione grinned "All right all in favour for the DA?" she said, getting on her knees to count the raised hands. "Motion passed! It's a majority!"

Then she wrote something down on the piece of parchment we all signed and pinned it to the wall. In big letters she had written:

DUMBLEDORE'S ARMY

I smirked "Right." I said when she sat down again "What do you think, Harry? Shall we get to practicing?"

Harry nodded and leaned into my ear "Disarming Charm?" he muttered to me.

I nodded and turned to everyone "ALL RIGHT!" I shouted, making the chatter silence "We're going to start with the Disarming Charm…you know…Expelliarmous."

"It may be basic, but I found it very useful." Harry chirped.

"Oh, please!" Zacharias Smith said, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms "You honestly think that Expelliarmous will defend us against You-Know-Who? We might as well learn hand to hand combat for all the good it'll do!"

"I used it against him." Harry said coldly "And it damn well saved my life last June."

"And so did hand-to-hand combat!" I snapped. "I fought off six Death Eaters single handed! But if you think it's so beneath you, you can leave and let Umbitch teach you Defence Against the Dark Arts."

Smith kept his mouth shut.

"Anyone else have anything to say?" I demanded.

Not a peep from anyone. Even Sheila, who normally was chatting away happily, was silent.

"Good." I said, smirking "Then pair up and practice. Harry and I'll make rounds and correct people should they need it."

Everyone clambered to find a partner after that. I paired up the first years. I paired Willow with Hiyori Kuran and the Ravenclaw girl, Merissa Grey with Lucas Burke. I put Lucas's sister, Desiree with Rose Zeller and Natalie MacDonald with Euan Abercrombie.

Sheila and She-Cat were paired together, and so were Ivy and Zacharias Smith (poor Ivy.). The Creevey brothers went together, and so did the Weasley twins. Anthony Goldstein and Terry Boot were paired together and for the final pair I can think of, Ginny and Michael Corner.

"Oi, Han!" Seamus said, coming up next to me "Be my partner? Dean's with Archimedes Lovegood."

I smirked "Sure…just try not to blow me up." I said, laughing.

"You shut up!" Seamus said, drawing his wand and pointing it at me. "Expelliarmous!"

Nothing happened. I shook my head "Seamus, you're supposed to wave your wand." I said "Watch me." I said, pointing my own wand at Seamus and waving it "Expelliarmous!"

There went Seamus' wand, toppling high over his head and down the shirt of Justin Finch-Fletchley, who's hair was currently on end due to Luna Lovegood's attempt to Disarm him.

"Ok, stop!" Harry shouted "Stop! STOP!"

Nothing happened. Then, I opened my mouth.

"Plug your ears, Seamus." I said softly.

Seamus gave me a confused look and obeyed.

"HEY!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, holding the "EY!" until everyone lowered their wands. "Thank you." I said, smiling "That wasn't bad…but there is room for improvement, as I've seen." Zacharias glared at me. "Let's go again. Ron, you don't mind working with Seamus as I make a few suggestions, do you?" I asked.

Ron shook his head reluctantly and set to work with Seamus as Harry and I walked around, patrolling and stopping here and there to make suggestions, improve wand waving, pretty much anything. And gradually, performance improved. I was rather shocked to see Seamus going so long without blowing something up.

Then Harry walked over to Cho Chang and her friend (Marietta, I think?), and Chang screwed up (I laughed in my head) and lit her friend's robe sleeve on fire.

After a very interesting conversation between the Lovegoods, Chang, Sheila, Ramona and Ivy, I had managed to check the time and shout for silence.

"Ok! Great work everyone!" I said to the DA "I say, seeing as Angelina is going to mention Quidditch practices and games, we meet up next Wednesday to decide on additional meetings then. Good night, all!"

Everyone walked out in their own little groups, Hermione, Harry, Ron and Ivy one of the last to leave.

"Hey, Han, you coming?" Ivy asked.

I looked around the room and shook my head "I'm going to clean up." I said simply.

Ivy just nodded and walked out with Hermione.

I started picking things up and putting them in random places, feeling proud of myself. If only Draco could see me then.

Draco…

Another war with my common sense and my irrationality ensued, my irrationality saying the reason Draco dumped me was because I was too ugly for his style. My common sense said there had to be a reason.

But, just like last time, my irrationality won…and I found myself with my dagger in hand again, wondering whether to slash my wrist or not.

I never got to make the decision, when someone grabbed my shoulders and I screamed.

"SKINNER, FANELLI AND FAKSA!" I shouted, only to be gagged.

"Merlin, Hannah," Fred's voice said "I thought you'd be safe. What on earth are you doing, trying to cut yourself!"

I blushed and mumbled something about my irrationality over what happened with me and Draco overtook my common sense.

"And my irrationality is kind of right, Fred, I mean, look at me!" I said, gesturing to myself "I'm small, I'm scrawny, I'm temperamental, I'm ugly…no wonder Draco didn't want me anymore." I said, tears falling down my face.

"Hey, hey." Fred said, hugging me "Enough of that. Your irrationality is wrong…you get me, wrong! Malfoy is a git and he didn't know what a beautiful, intelligent girl he had. Not to mention great at pranking Filch."

I smiled "Really?" I asked.

Fred nodded "Of course. In fact…" he lowered his voice down to a mutter "I kind of had a crush on you for a time."

I rolled my eyes "Ha-ha, very funny, Fred." I said, giggling.

Fred looked at me, serious for once "No, I'm serious. You're not like the other Slytherins I know. They were as bitchy, cynical, and despicable as you could get. You're one of a kind." I blushed and hugged Fred "I know you're just trying to get me to perk up, but…I can't for the life of me."

Fred tilted my chin up to look at him "Try?" he said, kissing my forehead "I hate to see my little sister and former crush upset."

I blushed "I don't know." I said, looking down.

Fred tilted my chin up again and placed a light kiss to my lips. "When you do know, you know where to find me." he said before walking out.

"Wait!" I said, making Fred turn around.

"What?"

"You'll get caught by Filch…maybe you ought to walk with me under my Invisibility Cloak to Gryffindor Tower." I said smirking.

Fred smirked "I'll be fine, Hannah. I'm one of the Weasley twins, remember? I'm fine with being caught." he came back over to my side and kissed my temple "I'll see you around, Han." he said before walking out.

The smirk was wiped off my face as I creased my eyebrows together when the door closed.

"What just happened?" I asked myself as I put on my Cloak and walked out of the room.