[ THE HUMAN CONDITION ]
Chapter XXVI: Before Heaven Falls
❝Anger's my meat; I sup upon myself,
And so shall starve with feeding.❞
William Shakespeare, Coriolanus
I WAS WORDLESS WHEN I exited my house, slamming the door behind me. Jacob had his arm hanging out of his truck's rolled-down window, head turned to face the girl beside him. He was occupied while I was pressed for time.
My limbs fidgeted and still felt the cold intensity of the uninhabitable waters I braved shortly ago—numb, wet, and cold to the touch. Before leaving and after a much-needed trip to the restroom to ring out my hair and relieve my bladder I rummaged my drawers for a presentable outfit, eventually emerging from my bedroom wearing a pair of dark-wash jeans I thrifted and a black, loose-fitting hoodie Kallie gave me for Christmas two years ago with a white undershirt. I swapped my soaked, muck-swathed sneakers for a pair of beaten-up combat boots. In an impulsive move I filled a black-and-white plaid backpack with everything I could possibly think of that someone would bring on an overnight trip. I packed a change of clothes, pajamas, my polka-dot umbrella, a crossword puzzle I hadn't messed around with in months, my toothbrush and toothpaste, a few granola bars I had lying in my junk drawer, and some shower essentials. Hopefully I'd be able to borrow a towel; it'd been a while since anything in this house was done. I picked up after myself, but I couldn't say the same for Jared or Dad. Especially recently. Our house was a mess—just like our lives.
I rubbed my hands up and down my arms as I left. I was warm by any and every physical definition, but I shook like the waters were still a part of me. My wet, tangled hair was pulled into a ponytail. My bare face, pale and exhausted looking if what I saw in the bathroom mirror wasn't a morphed delusion, had puffy eyebags and a pallor that wasn't characteristic of my russet skin. I chose clothes that were cover-all, not because I craved warmth but because of the bruises kissing my skin from underneath my prior ensemble. I looked like I had been through Hell. It gave me sad satisfaction to at least conceal the evidence of recent events, even if I still felt awful.
I failed to get Bella a change of clothes. Not out of malice, I assure you. Okay, maybe a little bit out of malice. It definitely wasn't out of forgetfulness.
I walked slowly to the driver's side of Bella's truck. The closer I got the less I could see from my place on the ground. Trucks were the nemeses of those in shorter stature—as I was sure the driver of this truck in particular's subconscious was gloating about, given I was short in stature.
The only working part of Jacob's thick head that was visible, his ear, twitched. I watched him turn from his murmured conversation with Bella and peer out over the open gap where a window screen was half rolled down.
"You get what you needed?" he asked.
I inhaled through my nose, exhaling from a pursed mouth. "I got a phone-call."
Jacob didn't say anything at first. He looked at me, probably mulling over what I said and running through the endless possibilities of why I looked so nervous. "Was it your Dad?"
"More or less," I said offhandedly before I could stop myself. Jacob shook his head, looking profoundly puzzled. "It was a Seattle airport employee. Um, they found my wallet in the luggage area."
"Why would your..." Jacob trailed off, seeming to come to the same conclusion I had. His eyebrows rose up to meet the animus-painted sky. "Oh, fuck."
"Yeah. Fuck," I said in agreement. I glanced around, basking for a brief moment in the crisp wintry air and strange serenity of the front-yard. Last night had been traumatizing in a sense, but I had yet to apply that trauma to the changing trees and reviving grass. Spring was around the corner and I smelt it, felt it, heard it. I wished I could live in this moment forever, even if it was at the cost of everything. I knew, though, that wasn't possible—or a real solution at all. I was just sixteen years old. I didn't want to be orphaned.
That's exactly what will happen if you fuck this up, dingus.
"We'll figure something out," Jacob said awkwardly. What an awful comfort that was. He jerked his head at the middle seat, where Bella was hidden. Frankly I forgot she was even there in the time Jacob and I were discussing the phone call, my mind running rampant with scenarios where I'd indeed end up an orphan. "When I drop you off at Harry's maybe Sam can—"
I knew without a shadow of a doubt what the boys would say. Jared would be adamant on aiding me in retrieving our Dad, which was a terrible idea; he was a vampire's natural enemy and the Volturi was an entire group of vampires. Seasoned vampires who even had Dakota, the most dangerous adversary we'd faced, curbed. I didn't want to risk his safety. And Paul, he would try convincing me to stay and we'd wind up in an argument. He would refuse to admit that I was the only plausible candidate for tracking him down or see that I wasn't completely defenseless, courtesy of the imprint bond. Embry would not go one way or another, but he would worry for my safety as my newly-appointed BFF and recommend I think over my options clearly and carefully- my decision-making process's polar opposite. Sam would want to think rationally, not impulsively and by the time I got him to realize this was an urgent matter that required an immediate fucking solution my own father could be a newborn vampire and I would lose the advantage of knowing his objective. He would be where the Volturi were sooner than I would have to make a decision that involved the pack, and I'd be doomed. Vampire or not, he'd still be my Dad—and I wouldn't forgive the pack if they killed him for a mistake he hadn't meant to make.
All these thoughts were reoccurring and impairing, and I hadn't stopped thinking about them since that phone call. They beleaguered me as I peed, as I dressed, as I tripped over my lawn of laundry carcasses.
"No," I said, interrupting Jacob before he finish. He didn't know what he was having an opinion about. "No, I can't. You know what Paul will say. You know what Sam will say, don't you, Jacob? I need—I need you to drive me to Seattle. Okay? Okay."
He thought I was insane. He looked at me like I just suggested eating cotton candy and going for some parkour rooftop jumping in Seattle instead of what I actually had planned. Ugh.
"I'm not getting on Paul's bad side for you," he said, like he wasn't perfectly capable of winning in a fight against Paul. I saw it with my own two eyes.
I scoffed, my head tilting a little as I looked over at the road to hide how annoyed I was. What a foolish thought; anyone with a brain could see I was pissed. I felt a raindrop touch my cheek. "Yeah, I know this isn't your Dad so you're not that worried, but cut me a little slack, Jake," I said hatefully. I gave him a derisive glare. Feeling more and more raindrops touch my hands that traveled with my mobile, over-energetic arms, as well as my face when I craned it to the blackening sky, I decided to move this "argument" to where both participants (minus the phlegmatic bystander) would be in a vehicle. I moved slow to avoid slipping on the wet asphalt and went over to Bella's passenger side. Bella had her eyes trained on her lap when I popped open the door and lifted myself in, using the overhead latch. The metal creaked and cracked like pop rocks.
Jacob didn't speak until I had my seatbelt secured around my torso and my head facing the front windshield. "Alissa, I really don't get why you want to go after your crazy Dad if he's apparently batshit," he said. "Do you even know what he's doing? Maybe he just left to blow off steam."
I scoffed like he was being ridiculous, but the blockhead did raise an excellent point. My father wasn't thinking lucidly, and I had my suspicions that he had fled Washington to travel to where the Volturi were stationed. Suspicions I didn't even need to confirm. I was never informed where that was exactly, but I knew who to ask. I was worried about our car and whether he stashed it away somewhere before hopping a plane. I thought about it now—where he was, if he had made it far in the time he was gone. A lot of questions came to me and none of them were answerable in my paranoid, half-delusive mind. He certainly hadn't left to blow off steam, I knew that much. I knew he wasn't acting himself and there was a part of him tampered by the ambitious darkness that had been extracted from Dakota, and it gave him a temperament rivaled by Paul's—and a drive that would lead him to his mortal grave.
"You are so fucking stupid," I hissed at Jacob. I didn't care that he had technically saved my life. Just because he did one good deed didn't discount the bad deeds; he had still been a monumental dick who thrived off publicly humiliating me. I wasn't about to forget it, though I'd been interested in blowing out the flames when I was delirious with relief from being alive. When there was pity in his eyes, and he didn't loathe me. It was all temporary. Everything good in my life was temporary.
Jacob started the truck, swerving recklessly out of the drive like a bat out of hell. The sharp movement threw my shoulder into the door, and I blurted out, "Watch it, dumbass!"
"I'm stupid?" he said right back, glancing at me but otherwise keeping his eyes on the road. We were going left, which wasn't exactly where the Clearwater house was located. Really, this was the way to Forks. I wasn't some GPS-minded genius but I wasn't directionally challenged, either; I knew Jacob had gotten ahead of himself and this was actually working out the way I intended it to. Score one for Lissy. "You're talking about jumping on a plane when you don't even know where to go. Do you know where to go?"
"No, I don't!" I said loudly, "but I'll figure it the fuck out. I know what the fuck my Dad plans to do and that's enough. He's going to find Dakota's masters. And we've got an insider right here, right now, don't we? Hey, Bella, do you know where the Volturi live—stay—whatever the fuck?"
Bella stiffened and her eyes went slow, traveling up from her soaked jeans to my face to meet my expectant gaze. I was on the edge of my seat, our legs touching, the moisture on her jeans dampening mine. Somehow I managed to not feel guilty for being warm while Bella was still trembling like a waterlogged dog. "The Volturi?" she repeated, ever a clueless parrot.
I hoped she wasn't repeating what I said because she didn't have a fucking clue who they were. "Yeah, you know them, right?"
Please know, please know, please know. Let's make Jacob feel clueless.
This lack of answers was being repetitive, not to mention excruciatingly exhausting. I couldn't afford to stay in this cyclic maze of unending, unanswered questions, searching desperately for the exit that would lead me to my father and meeting dead ends that looked just like each other. That's what these conversations felt like: dead fucking ends.
Bella breathed out of her mouth, seeming afraid and nervous all at once. "They're the most powerful vampire coven in the world," she said. The slow pace for her words made me think she assumed I was stupid. I wasn't stupid. "You're not saying your Dad went to them, right?"
"Gee, I guess you're not well-informed on my business," I said drily. She had her own problems and spent her time worrying over those, not mine or anyone else's. I didn't know whether to commend her for her self-preservation or think she was a selfish cunt. Yeah, the evidence speaks for itself.
Bella Swan was basically a leech herself, depending on eager Jacob Black for serotonin after her blood-sucking honey-bunny kicked her to the curb. It was actually kind of funny when I thought about it... I pitied Jacob but also didn't pity Jacob. I had no sympathy for Bella regarding this strange love dilemma.
Bella didn't say a word, looking nervous to engage in a battle of retorts with me. Smart.
I shook myself from my thoughts and smiled largely, the smile not meeting my eyes. Her calling the Volturi "powerful" scared me more than I'd ever care to admit. "Okay, yeah, I am. I'm not about to explain everything that's happened in the past month to you—Jacob's probably already said shit, he's- he's a fucking blabbermouth—but anyway, he's going to them. I know it for a fact. He's going to get turned into a vampire if I don't stop him. Do you want that on your conscience?"
"Can't you call up your leech friend if you're so worried?" Jacob said bitingly, interjecting where Bella had opened her mouth to speak.
He currently shares Dakota's bed, and I'd rather not jog the guy's memory with my situation, dumb-nut.
I laughed. "Roman's got a life, unlike you, Carraway. Besides, Bella here's our resident vampire extraordinaire. Ain't that right, Daisy?"
Both seemed confused by my remarks, but I wasn't expecting them to understand. I mostly said funny things to cope with my sad excuse for a life. I was also the most hilarious person I knew. Bella and Jacob were dry, boring people who lacked flavor. Thank God Embry and Paul existed or I might have had to decline permitted entry to Sam Uley's pack, as they were the only two around here that weren't insipid bozos. Jared used to be interesting until he opted for a girlfriend instead of Cajun seasoning. Relationships dragged people down hard when one of the partakers was a dull and dreary Jane Doe. Paul and I were a perfect match—
Ugh, this wasn't the time for mental tangents.
Bella, shrinking back into the leather seat, said, "I guess. Um, I was told—"
"By who?" I stared at her unabashedly, even when Jacob growled at me for interrupting and being oh-so uncouth about it.
Bella's face contorted. "By—him. By Edward."
"Jesus, honey, just spit it out," I said. "Edward Cullen? He's a four-syllable flake for sore ears. Privy tell the details."
"The Volturi live in Italy," Bella said, looking away from my wide, watchful eyes. "That's what he told me."
"Fuck," I said, forgetting what witty words were next to fall from my mouth. Instead I fell from sharp-witted grace. My eyes flitted to the nearest surface, the dashboard, and strained in fighting off the frustrated tears desperate to emerge and trail down my cheeks. I was upset and I tended to get physiologically emotional when I was upset. I gnashed my teeth, biting hard on my lower lip. Focus, focus, focus. I dug my nails into my jean-cladded thighs.
Well, I had already intended to track him down wherever the fuck he was and if Italy was my final destination, so be it.
"Paul and Jared will have a cow if you go to Italy," Jacob said, knowing exactly what I was thinking. Bella and I fell together when he swerved on the road to avoid a haphazardly-placed log. "Seriously, think straight, Cameron."
"Oh, I'm thinking straight," I said, my lip curling like it always did when someone said something I hated. In this instance he made it sound like I was an idiot who didn't understand consequences. I wasn't stupid; I was desperate and not willing to lose my father by being cautious. He didn't know the feeling because his father wasn't on the chopping block. "You're just a sissy-ass bitch who likes to think he's smarter than me. Newsflash, Friend-zone; you—"
Jacob held his hand up. "Shut up."
"—think but thinking it doesn't make it true. This decision was easy for me because I'm thinking for my Dad, not me, you, or fucking Paul—"
"Seriously, Alissa, shut up," Jacob barked.
I went silent, disliking his tone but clearly seeing the look on his face. I noticed we were knee-deep into Forks territory now, passing by angry forest foliage and trees that were slowly returning to life under the spring sun. Jacob was driving at a speed past the limit that I would have feared if I were focused on hazards the way my senses screamed at me to.
Jacob was different compared to what I was manifesting in my head when I actually looked at him. His back was tense and he had his head turned to peer out of the window. Alert, like he sensed something dangerous and was lurking closer with what senses were available, searching for the thing.
I should have cared. I was in more danger than I could fathom, but my motivations and priorities had been discombobulated by the emotional rope tugs that kept taking me in different directions. I didn't know what to apply my care towards, and by this point I was desensitized. I ran on pure adrenaline.
I eyed Jacob, urging him to just fucking say it with my eyes.
We don't have time for this.
Jacob's lips coiled back as he flashed his teeth. A snarl was on the end of his tongue. "I thought I smelt something."
I rolled my eyes and bit back a retort that would certainly have him shifting in the vehicle, getting me and Bella injured beyond repair or just plain fucking dead in the process. My eyes went to peer outside. I didn't leave the reserve much, unless I wanted to branch out from the La Push preservation and tread murky territory like the Forks woodland. The town itself was as foreign to me as peace. I knew we were here only by how strange and new the passing houses on Jacob's side were, the way the woods didn't hover over the blacktop road like they would swallow it if given the chance.
We were in Forks, but I was too busy arguing to truly take it until now.
I flashed back to what Jacob last said. I thought I smelt something.
Catching the scent of something usually meant a vampire. I went stiff as I thought about the only vampires I knew, the most recent encounter with one being Victoria. What a shitty first impression.
"What?" Bella asked, drawing me from my thoughts. She shuffled closer to Jacob's side.
He whipped his head around with his face twisted violently, much more severe than the tense but calm disposition he had earlier. An expression painted him from brow to chin, one of ire.
"A leech," he spat, like it was blasphemy. His hands gripped the steering wheel so tight I heard a tear like the cover of the wheel itself was being torn by his liquidating grip.
I understood his anger. I wasn't prejudiced against vampires the way the rest of the pack was, being they were mortal enemies while I held Roman and others like him in the highest regard, but I did have an inherent fear of the bad ones. The rogues, the hunters. The killers.
Bella went rigid as a frozen pole. "What? How do you know?"
Jacob didn't answer. His foot pressed deeper into the gas pedal, and I only knew this by the sudden acceleration of the truck. As I glanced up to look outside the windshield I saw houses. The houses went past in a blur of hues and patterns; my eyes couldn't keep up. My only assumption was that Jacob was angry, and he was expressing his anger by being reckless. As I thought we were in the clear and Jacob's anger would stop interfering with his driving, he started twisting the wheel, not letting up from the gas. Loud crumbling sounds emerged, like he broke the blacktop in his impulsive decision to do a U-turn. Instead my guessed U-turn was him turning into a driveway of a house I couldn't see, even with the headlights. Bella made a noise of complaint, something like a humph, while I was more vocal in my annoyance.
"Jesus H. Christ, you moronic dickhead!" I shouted, feeling my shoulder crash into the passenger side door. My head rattled off the window, and I was aching when Jacob's reckless turn ended, my torso swaying but somehow able to keep upright. My hand flew to my temple as the truck settled in a parked position, my ears perking up at the sound of Jacob maneuvering the gearstick. I massaged the area on my left side, where my hairline met raw skin, that was hit most by his Die Hard routine. "God, what the fuck—you are worse than Driving Miss Daisy over here! You—"
Jacob only got out of the truck, not listening to my rant. I quickly shut up.
Bella's head tilted over at me tentatively while Jacob set to work doing whatever it was he was doing—probably scaling the yard of wherever for dog bones. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," I said. I didn't feel okay, but saying I wasn't would solidify my caged reality. I wanted to be okay and saying so was the start of being so. My eyes flickered up to meet Bella's. Her eyes were a similar shade of brown, maybe just a touch lighter. They were naive and innocent, with just a touch of grief—the eyes of someone who hadn't been completely tainted by darkness.
Bella nodded and, like staring too long at me would bring bodily harm, she looked away.
I repressed a scowl and situated myself. My seatbelt was sitting stiff on my torso and, hating being so perceptive of the strap, I moved my head around it so that the only visible strap would be the one encasing the top line of my pelvis. I peered out of my side's window and searched around for Jacob's figure, but he was nowhere to be seen. I found out why very quickly, when the driver side door came open like with a loud clanking sound.
"Welcome back," I snarked.
Jacob huffed out a breath, obviously annoyed, and he swung himself back into his seat. This took no effort whatsoever, considering he was tall and dexterous. His hand went to where Bella's key ring was hanging out of the key slot, and he deftly turned off the ignition. I gaped as the truck sputtered to a quiet stop.
"One of the first things Sam talked about with imprints was how we can feel their pain," Jacob said, glancing at me out of the corner of his eye. I didn't say a word as I was busy questioning his reasons for turning off the truck when this couldn't possibly be Bella's abode. "If he feels your pain how come Paul wasn't the one who rescued you?"
No, there it was again. Doubt. Paranoia. Fear. My body went numb and hot all at once, like a spotlight as hot as the fucking sun was searing a tattoo into my skin.
"I don't know," I said reluctantly, hating that it wasn't a lie. I truly didn't know—and that scared me. It occurred to me then, swiftly and violently, that all these emotions weren't right. This entire fucking thought process wasn't right. There were bigger fish to fry than Paul and I's unconventional relationship. My eyes narrowed at Jacob. "But don't change the subject, Romeo. What was that?"
Jacob didn't catch the accusation, or he was just playing coy. He returned my stare with a blank one of his own. "What was what?"
"What was—oh my God, both of you were dropped on your fucking heads as infants," I said, and if I didn't have any dignity left I might have audibly groaned. This was one of those situations where groaning just fit. My hand automatically came up to meet my cheek and I held on like my life depended on it, needing something to cling to. Otherwise, I was going to hit somebody and that would be incentive enough for another scar constellation to be added to my bodily asterism. Obviously by Jacob; Bella was definitely one of those girls who'd wrap her thumb up while throwing a punch.
You're just full of mental tangents, aren't you, Lissy?
I didn't dignify my cynical conscience with a response.
Disliking the direction things were heading, I rolled my eyes. At what, I didn't exactly know. Jacob's face maybe?
Jacob caught the eye-roll but he ignored it in favor of having an epiphany. "Oh!" was all he said, at first. He blinked a couple times, glanced down at Bella like she'd provide him a complete transcript of alternative answers befit with forty different languages and an index, before he finally looked at me. "I was checking for the leech."
"Okay, good check," I said, scoffing. What I really wanted to say was, Good dog.
Jacob was the one to narrow his eyes this time, and he looked like he wanted to say something by-the-Gods-awful. But he didn't say what I was anticipating. "I can't smell it anymore. The scent's faded."
I had to physically detach my hand from my face, as it was my only comfort in this game of "have a two-way conversation with drying cement". "Okay, Jake," I said, in a light, placating tone. Jacob's eyebrows rose to the sky. "You want a treat for your good work?"
I was expecting some sort of reaction, maybe a slur or subtle shoulder tremors, but Jacob stoically turning on the ignition wasn't one. He had no sense of direction, just jerking out of the gravel drive we were on like he physically owned the lot. I felt the immediate transition from gravel to blacktop, as the surface the wheels were riding over lost its hallmark crunching sound effects. I was clutching the overhead handle without knowing what I was doing until I was doing it. Jacob was an aggressive driver—and I knew I was doing the right thing clutching the handle with one hand and my seatbelt strap with the other when he slammed his foot on the gas pedal, launching us down the road faster than I'd ever seen someone drive on a tiny Forks road.
I side-eyed him. His jaw was clenched, or looked clenched; it had to be, unless his face was naturally that taut. I knew it wasn't. Bella's was lax, the opposite, and she stared out of the front windshield with an impassive expression that occasionally looked pained. I was seething from anger, cursing Jacob, cursing Bella, cursing basically anyone who I had a history with. Mostly Jacob, who I wanted to take my anger out on but was getting nowhere with. Wasn't he my biggest hater?
To Hell with it, I thought, not actually believing it.
This entire conversation was a train wreck, and I was through with talking. I didn't question Jacob when he rolled his window down slightly, enough I could hear wisps of wind whacking the glass.
I was so through that when Jacob suddenly braked in the middle of the road just five minutes after my vow of silence I didn't physically react.
My eyes did, however, glance over at him, wondering why he insisted on stopping in the middle of an open road. The answer was quite simple—and painted unambiguously on his face.
Like back in wherever his brow was furrowed, his jaw was tightened hard enough it gave the illusion of dimples, and his lips were peeled back to show off elongated, gum-bordered teeth.
"What is it this time, Scott?" I asked derisively, really getting tired of this stop-and-go routine.
Jacob didn't answer. He looked tense and guarded, surveying out of the windshield as rain pelted down. Huh, I didn't even notice the rain until now; boy was it coming down with a vengeance. I focused in on its pitter-patter shower, then the army of raindrops that had surrounded us like a cloak, before ultimately looking back at Jacob. He was wet from when he previously jumped from the truck to track down what he scented. Even in the dark I could see his raven black hair had matted itself to his scalp and his forehead. His olive t-shirt was just as wet, though I wasn't about to stare down at his chest.
Wolves were volatile, territorial creatures. I couldn't base all my knowledge on stupid teen movies like Teen Wolf and Ginger Snaps or even stupid adult movies like An American Werewolf in London. Those weren't real; this was. The werewolves I knew were concrete and three-dimensional, and outside of their furry shells they were human. They were terrifying from what I saw in their shifted forms—and all it took was a single step out of line to provoke an uncontrolled shift.
I wasn't stupid. I didn't want to goad Jacob and see what a wolf shifting in a moving vehicle looked like. I also wasn't about to assume Jacob was pulling my leg and fabricating a vampire threat. Ordinary wolves were killers, and wolves hiding underneath human skin had the same potential. I wanted to believe Jacob was more mature than he acted. I hoped his current behavior wouldn't rope us into a chase scene straight from Evil Dead—or another fucking injury that'd incapacitate me from tracking down my Dad.
Ugh. Another mental tangent.
I shook my head, tuning in to Jacob again. He had snapped out of his guard, his eyes looking away from the windshield. When he met my eyes I had this sudden, uncontrollable urge to yawn. I yawned, soundlessly.
He rubbed the base of his thumb into his eyeball. "The leech's scent, it's stronger that it was back there," he said. "It's close."
I nodded. "Okay. So... go kill it?"
"Why don't you go kill it?" Jacob stopped rubbing his eye to glare at me.
I smiled, not knowing if I was going for sickeningly sweet or drop-dead hateful. "If I wanted to kill something I'd start with the dumbass who has us stopped in the middle of the fucking road like he owns it."
I was sure if the dying light were—well, brighter I'd notice his nostrils flaring and his eyes closing into slits. "You have a death wish, Cameron."
"Oh, I do? Really?" I didn't finish before a laugh came falling out of my mouth. "Sorry, it's just that you keep stopping the truck to play hide-and-seek with a freaking scent. Did you forget that my Dad is going to a coven of murderous vampires to get the Bite—or were you too busy chasing your fucking tail?!"
My voice rose as I got angrier and angrier, my veins feeling like they were enflamed. I was just so fed up.
At some point Jacob began to tremble like a dog with rabies, and at another point Bella placed her hand on his shoulder and orally asked if he was alright. Dumbass—don't you know you're supposed to run like Hell from shifters getting ready to explode? I forewent the concept of unrequited love on a shifter's part. Apparently Isabella Swan was his Pamela, otherwise her foolish attempt at placating the Big Bad Wolf wouldn't have worked. I rolled my eyes without caring it was in plain sight of a wolfman who didn't have control over his furry counterpart.
I wasn't exactly planning to piss him off like that before the word vomit came spewing out, but whatever. He'd get over it and starting now I'd be a mollifier if there ever was one.
The tremors stopped midway through Bella's placation and now he was slime-like putty in her hands. Though there was something about Jacob's motionless figure that didn't sit right with me, but I wasn't about to throw away my momentary safety and question it. Jacob's sudden calm was all Bella's doing; if I unraveled it the consequences wouldn't listen to my excuses. Mr. Wolf didn't verbalize his frustrations with me like I was expecting, and I watched like a seagull around clownfish as he revved the engine again. It roared loudly and proudly, not a single hiccup in its conduct. We were starting forward, heading down an open, empty road, without any other impediments. Jacob didn't look at me once.
I slackened against my seat without feeling any relief.
There came an impediment of my own, all mental. In my head swirled the unforgotten memories of Dakota, without me wanting, let alone trying to recall them. Really, they just came unannounced. An uninvited guest in a home built for one. I was relieved we'd finally be getting somewhere, so this wasn't exactly what I had in mind for something to preoccupy myself with until Jacob reached our destination. But here it was.
Dakota was a fucked-up guy. Now my Dad's a fucked-up guy. I didn't want my Dad to be a part of Dakota's legacy. He was an asshole who did a lot of shit to me that made me want to cry at times, but he was still my Dad. It wasn't just blood that made him important to me.
When we pulled up to what appeared to be Bella's ominously unlit house, Jacob tensed again. This time he didn't react by jolting the truck or jumping out, but I felt a tad bit of acceleration before he pulled the truck to a complete stop. He left his keys hanging from the side of the steering wheel and had Bella pressed deeply into his chest before I could question the dopey look on his face.
His eyelids fluttered shut. "I'm glad you're okay," he mumbled into her hair. I heard fabric shift as his arms maneuvered their way from her shoulders to her back.
For several seconds Bella had her limbs pinned to her sides, entire figure stricken like a stick. I felt like a stalker just staring at her. Here was this petite girl being hugged by this bulking mass of human flesh, a guy who had nothing but praises to sing about her. She'd have to be an idiot to not see how much Jacob adored her. Her own Romeo left, so what was keeping her from jumping on the nearest validator? What stopped her from leeching the life out of him? I watched him pin for her, year after year, and let him sling mud pies at me and drag my fucking name through the mud. Half the time it was because of a bitter rivalry started by our fathers, but when she was here in the summer... he likely did it under the deluded notion of impressing the visiting princess.
Bella's limbs slowly raised and went to circle Jacob's waist. Where the embrace had been unreciprocated they were now pressed flush against one another. I blew out a breath I didn't know I was holding. My nails, sharp and untrimmed, dug deeply into my pants leg.
Is this supposed to be romantic? I wondered. My eyebrows raised without my prompting. As the seconds ticked by I became impatient.
"I absolutely hate to break this up," I said loudly, relishing the way Bella practically lurched out of Jacob's grip, "but can we please get out?"
Jacob's head turned toward me but it was too dark to catch his exact expression. He popped his door open, the hinges lightly squeaking, and a crisp gust of wind whooshed in.
It felt great after having the truck's heating system incinerate my will to live, but Jacob didn't seem to think so. "Fuck," he said breathlessly, and the driver side door slammed shut, cutting off Mother Nature's next exhale.
"Not again," I said and promptly crashed my head back into the bottom of the headrest. Flutters of coffee brown hair went everywhere, obscuring my eyesight.
Bella shuffled along the seat, moving closer—if physically possible—to Jacob. "What's wrong?"
"Vampire," Jacob said gruffly. "This one's... different."
I rolled my eyes but didn't say anything. This was the third time and I was lost for any words that'd dispel his vendetta-led agenda.
Bella, head facing forward, was observing out the windshield. The truck's headlights had opened a path of light that was revealing only a sliver of the front of her house. Jacob hadn't yet parked, and I knew it was only seconds before he'd go running off from the truck on another wild goose chase. He was strangely adamant on catching himself a vampire. To prove himself to the pack? Huh, we'd have that in common, but Jacob was the descendant of the Black ancestral line. He had nothing to prove, just something to live up to.
"Wait," Bella said suddenly, though her voice cut sharply before she really finished saying the word. Her body jerked up against the dashboard, arm brushing mine in brief contact. "It's okay. Jake, it's okay. I just—" She cut herself off and turned to look at me. "Let me out."
Well, that came out demanding. I snorted at the absurdity of it all.
"Why?"
"Alissa, it's Carlisle's car," she said, pointing. I followed her finger to the windshield, seeing nothing but the faded-white plating of a house and black, black, and more black. The car, wherever it was, wasn't illuminated by her truck's headlights. "It's a black Mercedes S55 AMG—here, just let me out. We're safe, I promise."
I'd heard a promise like that before, and those weren't promises to be trusted. But I didn't really care about Bella throwing herself into danger. She was more reckless than me, the tiny difference being she seemed to thrive off danger. She thrived off being the victim and didn't even realize it. Not disappointed either way if she lived or was taken by a creature of the night, I scooted out of the cab, opening the door without any difficulty locating the handle, and planted on wobbly, tingling feet. My legs throbbed.
Bella joined me seconds later. I watched without feeling much of anything as she bolted for her headlight-lit house, bypassing the car I could now very well see.
I watched Bella until she stumbled on the stairs at the door leading to her house. She looked for a key up on the overhead wooden plate but apparently didn't find it. She fumbled for the doorknob, then disappeared into the interior, the door shutting loud behind her.
Huh.
I was so intent on watching her leave that I forgot I wasn't totally alone.
"Cameron, what the hell?" Jacob asked me through gritted teeth.
I turned my head to look at him. He was trembling, and there was a strain in his voice. Anger was dominant in him and control was a foreign concept—a foreign ability.
I wasn't afraid of him the way I should have been. I knew there would be vehicular carnage if he burst; my safety wasn't in question. I could walk a few feet to the side and avoid his claws. I'd laugh in mocking and lament him for destroying property that didn't belong to him.
"You should get out if you're gonna shift, idiot," I said.
"I can't protect her here, if it's a Cullen," he said scathingly, ignoring my advice. "It's—"
"It's part of the treaty, I know. Who cares? If she wants to wander willy-nilly into a scene from Van Helsing, be my guest. She reminds me of an 80s slasher final girl: stupid as fuck." I looked over at the house again. It didn't feel like she was getting ripped limb from limb. No fatal cries rung out in the night; no lights flickered ominously on and off in the curtained windows. Though, it did seem that one of the rooms had begun glowing with a luminous golden hue since Bella first went inside.
Jacob's eyes looked black in the darkness. "We can't be caught on their territory. If they're back, the treaty's back."
"So? They came unannounced, and to me that screams, 'Hey, here for a quick visit, then we'll be gone in a giffy. Too-ta-loo,'" I said without thinking to raise my voice into shrill bells like I normally would for a vocal impersonation, recalling Bella's surprise at seeing the Mercedes. She wasn't anticipating their presence; like most terrible actresses, emotions were her telltale between fake and genuine. She was surprised. "She's not in danger, Black. Calm your tits."
A growl rumbled his chest, imitating a car engine. I only smirked.
Seconds ticked by and neither of us said anything. I eventually had enough. "You still need to take me to an airport," I told him matter-of-factly.
He sputtered out a laugh. "I never said I was going to take you to the airport. I told you I wasn't going to get on Paul's bad side. If I did that I'd be getting on Paul's bad side."
"So what, are you too sissy to risk it?" I had more fitting words I could have used, but it wasn't the right time to use them.
"If you get killed, I'll be skinned," he said, eying me like I was crazy.
I was about to respond noncommittally, as I frequently did with clowns impersonating teenage boys, but then it truly registered to me what he was implying. Nothing about his claim would have mattered if I didn't almost drown less than three hours ago.
If you get killed, I'll be skinned.
I knew it showed on my face, the volatile rage slowly consuming me. "Is that why you saved me?" I asked in a boiled voice.
He asked me, as though I had any way of knowing myself, why Paul didn't feel that I was in danger.
Jacob hesitated, and that was enough for me to know how he really felt. I harrumphed and turned my back to the open cab door.
"Alissa, wait—look, I didn't mean it that way," Jacob said, his voice following me like a shadow. "I didn't put you in the water. If I drove you to the airport I'd be putting you in danger. I wouldn't- I-I don't know. You won't believe me no matter what I say. Trust me though, I'm not that bad. I don't want you dead or anything."
"I know you don't want me dead. I would have drowned if that's the case," I said, trying and failing to hide my ire. I whirled around so he could see my face in the dim, receding sunlight. "But let's be honest with ourselves, Jacob—that's what really matters, right? Self-honesty? Well, here's my honest spill for you; I don't matter to you. You saved me because you didn't like the consequences of me being dead more than me being a breathing bother. I'm not fucking stupid, so don't play head games with me."
"Do you hear yourself? You sound crazy," Jacob said, sounding and looking exasperated himself. I was exasperated too—with myself, with his stupid fucking face and attitude, with my life.
"Maybe I'll die in Italy so you never have to see me again. I'd be one ecstatic dead girl," I said and barked out a laugh. "Except I'll probably still smell like dog. Aposematism works for vampires too, ya know? They'll smell wet dog and just magically recoil away. I'll live to annoy you another day."
Jacob didn't have a response for that, and I didn't blame him. I was saying what came to my mind. Speaking with a viper tongue and obtuse mind, letting years of passive aggression build up to blow a hole in a thinly-built dam—unleashing everything I once tried my hardest to keep under wraps. That plan was soiled, shot to Hell and back.
My lip twitched as Jacob's silence ensued.
"Whatever. I'm going inside. Maybe I'll get the royal treatment earlier than planned," I said sarcastically. Jacob only stared. He was probably done with my bullshit, as I was done with his.
He saved you. You should be a bit more grateful, came that dastard bastard inner voice that loved to remind me when I was being ridiculous.
I don't care, my snark bit back, used to riding solo. Used to being the bitch of everyone's narrative.
I didn't think, I just fled. I speed-walked to Bella's door and barged in like I had lived there my entire life. I left the passenger side door of her truck swung wide open.
"Jake?" Bella called from somewhere off to my left, but I stayed where I was, glancing around at the strange territory I just waltzed into. It was a little brash, a little rude of me to come in without an invite, but Bella hadn't really laid out the ground rules before running off to meet her lifeless visitor. If anyone was at fault it was her. So I took advantage of my own self-assertion and got a load of the princess's castle.
It wasn't grand. It was actually quite majestic by my personal standards of housing, being I came from a reservation where every abode looked like your average welfare house unless a builder lived within, but it was typical—like the shit I saw on TV, just a nock or two below Boy Meets World—everywhere else. I had wandered into the foyer, and there were openings to other rooms on both sides. A boat-shaped shelf was hung on the wall to my left side and the wall of the foyer was painted a tan color that looked the same shade as my kitchen. Huh.
I walked slowly to the opening that had the most light emitting from it. Popping my head around the corner I found myself facing what appeared to be the living room. Lamps were lit in several corners, and a green-colored couch was set in the middle. The room itself was compact, with walls a similar color to the foyer and a TV settled by the wall. I felt my eyebrows raise involuntarily.
"Alissa, where's Jake?" came Bella's voice again, and I realized I completely breezed through my inspection. I looked at the couch again, seeing two figures. Two figures.
I blanched back at one of the faces staring at me. It was unearthly, with eyes that looked too big and too bright to be human, the same shade of golden amber as Roman's. The girl sitting with Bella was beautiful, with a jet black pixie cut and eyebrows just as dark. She was thin and in white garments tied together by a pair of dark jeans, a scarf pulled around her neck. Even just sitting I could tell she was short—shorter than me, shorter than Bella, certainly shorter than Jacob.
After taking in the beautiful visitor's appearance, I turned my attention to Bella. "Being a dick," I said sharply.
Bella blinked. "I thought he was leaving?"
Why the fuck did you even ask where he is then? Ugh.
"He'll be in here soon enough," I said, knowing she wasn't stupid enough to think I meant anything less than him staying. I crossed my arms and leaned against the wooden arch. It wasn't exactly an exaggeration that Jacob would appear after claiming he couldn't protect her here; he was always pulling idiotic stunts, which included letting his undying devotion to Bella Swan lead him into shit shows. He wouldn't just leave. I looked at Bella's vampire friend, noting the way she unwaveringly stared at me. Sizing me up, thinking up ways I could be a threat, wondering who I was to Bella. Dakota had that same fucking stare; his was just far less subtle. "I'm Alissa, by the way."
The girl smiled the way most people do when meeting distant relatives. Like she didn't yet know what to make of me. "I'm Alice," she said. "Nice to meet you."
"Likewise," I said, though I was still reeling from my conversation with Jacob. I had my hands curled into fists from where my arms were crossed; it was intentional, so Bella and Alice wouldn't realize it was taking all of my control not to explode. My lips were upturned in an artificial smile. I probably seemed rude or like I was prejudiced against vampires the same as werewolves, but that really wasn't the case. They'd see what was casting a spell of loathing over me when Jacob finally came.
Alice and Bella looked to each other again. I watched Alice lean towards Bella before she violently blanched back. "I smell... wet dog," she said, turning her head away from the admittedly wet, shivering Bella.
"That's probably me," Bella said awkwardly. She shuffled away from Alice like she was the embodiment of the Black Plague. "Jacob's kind of a werewolf—"
Alice scoffed and her head shook a little. "Bella," she snapped patronizingly, sounding like this wasn't her first time criticizing Bella's choice of... choices, "werewolves are not good company to keep."
What the fuck is this turning into—Love and Vampires?
I cut my own laugh off, smothering it with my palms. My uncrossed arms made a praying motion, my two hands cupping my mouth like my life depended on it.
The two couch-sitters frowned at me for my interruption. I frowned back, right as they turned their attention back to each other. Huh, what's that face for? All I did was laugh—FUCK!
An arm brushed against mine, and I reacted a split second too soon. I whirled around. My arm went up and extended out, hitting the stone-hard abdomen of someone that was decidedly not an immediate enemy, though that was slightly underexaggerating. I could feel my emotions raging inside me. Anger was at the forefront of everything, like my hormones wanted to enact a scene from Independence Day here in the middle of Bella's living room. When I tilted my head up to look into the dark eyes of someone I wished would disappear from my life, I felt a scowl appear on my face. I could barely see from how narrow my eyes became.
"Why couldn't you just stay outside?" It came out before I could bite my tongue.
Jacob disregarded me, regarding instead the idle, couch-sitting vampire who happened to be his exemplary mortal enemy. "Speak for yourself, leech," he said in a sneering voice.
I rolled my eyes. I could have said a billion different things, but I chose to stay silent and watch this absolute train-wreck of a shitshow happen right in front of me. Oh, the joys of a bystander complex. And there wouldn't even be any survivor's guilt afterward—not from me. Bella was a different case.
Alice had leapt from her seat the minute Jacob spoke, and she was feet away from him before my eyes could process the movement. Bella stood up from her couch at a more leisurely pace.
"Jake," the girl said—more like breathed. Her voice came out all husky and low.
Jacob had his arms pinned down at his sides and his backside was to me; I stared at it, hoping my laser-like gaze made him uncomfortable.
"I had to make sure you were safe," Jacob said tensely.
Alice scoffed, glaring at him like she had the vampiric ability to make self-absorbed dog-men spontaneously combust. Bella was the one to speak, and she sounded confused: "But you said the treaty—"
"I don't care about the treaty. I care about you," he burst out, his shoulders shaking.
What? She wasn't there when we talked about the treaty. It took several seconds for my pea-sized brain to comprehend. Oh, wait. Previous conversation I wasn't there for. Got it.
"I would never hurt her," Alice said defensively.
The emphasis on "I" intrigued me. It put me on edge. Who of her family hurt Bella, if not her? Certainly not Edward, her beau?
"No, you Cullens are all harmless," Jacob said in a low, sarcastic voice. I watched his head move back and forth. "I'm talking about the redhead."
"Victoria?" Alice's eyes went wide, and she snapped her head over to peer accusingly at Bella.
Bella had her arms circling her waist, as always an awkward duckling surrounded by wildebeests—minus me, the hotblooded jackrabbit. She looked down when Alice set her sights on her. Whether from shame or fear, I didn't know. "I was trying to tell you before—I didn't jump in the water. Me and Alissa were knocked in by her."
Alice sucked in a breath, turning to look at me with a gaze so piercing it felt like a laser searing through my body. Her eyes looked at me, then at Jacob, then back at me again.
"What are you?" she asked.
I blinked. "Not sure I understand the point of that question..." I said, dancing around the damned thing per usual. "Care to spell it out for me?"
"I didn't see you in my visions. I didn't see you get pulled out of the water either," Alice said, aiming the last part at Bella. "You smell strange. You're not quite human."
"Oh, I'm as human as they come," I said with a loud, unhidden snort.
Alice's eyes narrowed into slits. "No, you're something... different. I've never smelt anything like it."
Opening my mouth to further beat around the bush, I didn't get far. Jacob made it to the punch before me. "She's an emissary in training," he informed her. He purposefully emphasized the last part to be a dick.
He was just asking for me to kick his ass with my newfound powers. Ah, but my witticisms were my favorite weapon. "Bite me, bitch," I snapped.
Alice took a step closer; disliking her proximity, Jacob stepped around until he was beside Bella. Or maybe he just wanted to be close to her. What a whipped Muppet knockoff. "Carlisle mentioned a Quileute man who possessed an 'emissary' title, but not a teenage girl."
I rolled my eyes. "That's my Dad. I'm his descendant, I guess."
"Oh, I see," she said. She looked at Jacob now, and she suddenly looked angry. "I didn't see Victoria, I didn't see Bella get rescued. I can't see past you and your pack of mangy, flea-bitten mutts!"
From my new view of Jacob's frontside, I could visibly see him get angry. His shoulders began trembling and his feet took steps forward without him seeming to prompt the movement. "Don't," was all he said, in a voice of barely-contained rage.
Bella put her hand on his shoulder, in a coaxing, comforting manner. "Stop," she said. Jacob didn't listen and still tried to come towards Alice. "Stop, Jacob! Why did you come in here if you were going to act like that?"
"I'm asking myself that right now," he said. He didn't even look at her.
Alice looked between them, probably sensing the sexual tension—oh, I meant platonic tension. "I'll leave you two alone," she said. Before Bella could offer her rebuttal, Alice was off like a jet, except all she really did was squeeze by me and walk outside.
"Yeah, I don't want to listen to this," I said to Bella and Jacob. Alice had the right idea leaving Dodge while it was the most conspicuous but least secondhand-embarrassment-inducing. Nobody wanted to hear the two of them profess their undying affection for each other and then promptly deplore Bella's choice in former lover and then awkwardly brace for a kiss that wasn't happening on my watch.
Jacob didn't like that. "Then leave. Paul's probably looking for you anyway," he said angrily, pinpointing me with his beady little eyes.
"I literally don't care," I said. I raised my middle finger and left like I truly didn't. My gait had a poise that was unmatched, and ungainly Bella could use a few notes.
I didn't go too far. Being nosy and not wanting to risk an awkward conversation with a graceful vampire that would likely lead to me making a fool of myself, I only turned to face the foyer again and impulsively barged my way through the opposite door. The lights were off and my clumsy search for a light switch went off with a hitch.
I snorted. I don't even have to try, do I?
The humor faded quickly when I realized Jacob and Bella were talking, and I was missing it. What was the point in committing a slow get-away to eavesdrop if I wasn't actively eavesdropping? I settled for just leaning against the doorpost with my back turned to the foyer. My ears were open and listening to their murmured exchange, though I did bemoan their choices to be so quiet.
"... Are the rest coming back?" Jacob was asking when I first tuned in, in a cool, authoritative voice.
"No," Bella said. "Not that I know of. Alice didn't say."
"Oh. Good."
"'Good?'" Bella sounded fuming—unlike what paralanguage I associated her with—and I could feel my eyebrows raise like they had a mind of their own. "Okay, Jacob. Go tell Sam that the scary monsters aren't coming to get you."
Jacob scoffed. "Okay, Bells."
Suddenly, there were footsteps. I swiftly turned out of the doorway and pretended to be admiring the Swan refrigerator. Oh nice, a report card for one Isabella Swan from last year where she got mostly A's. A magnet for the Forks Police Department. A grocery list, and an Alcoholics Anonymous motivational quote? Talk about a cry for help—
"Bella," Jacob said in an urgent, loud voice; apparently his and Bella's footsteps brought him to my place in the Swan residence's kitchen. I turned away from my innocent act of snooping just as Bella arrived at the door. She barely glanced at me, but Jacob sure as hell took notice. He had a knack for that. He got that look on his face anyone would when catching a nosey scoundrel snooping through private possessions. "Alissa, this isn't your house. You can't just go through people's shit."
"What am I doing? I am standing here, waiting for you to give me a ride to the fucking airport!" I said, voice getting louder until it rose into a shout. I didn't take kindly to asshats—sorry, teenage boys questioning my intentions. First Jared, now this fucker? The pack had a hive mind or something; this shit was unnatural and totally uncalled for.
Jacob shook his head, apparently seeing there was no way to go but in zigzags with me. I was a retort champion and he was the Bella-infatuated white knight, basically. He looked back to the apple of his eye, the "object" of his affections. She was standing by the cabinets with her arms crossed over her chest, and only now with her so close to me did I notice she had changed from her wet clothes into a dark thermal shirt and a pair of dark jeans. Ooh, she's a dark and mysterious one. Any wonder she went and snatched herself an equally dark and mysterious vampire for a lover? Dark and mysterious attire? I only wore black because it was convenient and the least likely to show stains.
God, my inner voice made it difficult not to laugh in critical moments like this. Really though—what was I supposed to do? Shut it off? I'd rather gorge my eyes out; sometimes the only person I could stand was myself. I was the walking embodiment of comic relief here in this modern rendition of Interview with the Vampire, now featuring werewolves and their bitches and me, a step up from the interviewer's dreary commentary.
"I keep breaking my promise, don't I?" Oh, Jacob Black was still relevant.
Bella put a strand of hair behind her ear and frowned up at Jacob, aggravation clear as day. "You do," she said, "but so do I."
Um, Jacob is an actual man-baby who probably won't stop groveling at your feet until you clone yourself so he has his own Bella, I thought, disgusted with Bella surrendering herself to him so easily. Just kick dirt in his face and make a run for it.
The two of them went into the most awkward, unbearable stare-down I've ever been a witness to, and self-consciousness as a third-party flooded me like a particularly heavy menstrual flow. I made a noise of disgust before personal willpower could kick in.
The two idiots looked over at me, one with unsaid rage and one with embarrassment, and I let my eyebrows raise to my hairline. "No offense, but ew."
It was as simple as that. Ew.
Jacob opened his mouth to spew out an arrangement of insults, but the mounted landline by his head interrupted him. It got in two annoying, insistent rings before Jacob's arm shot out and he seized it. It immediately quieted and he brought it to his ear.
"Swan residence," he said into the receiver. He listened for a moment, and his face grew rapidly more tense, flattening before his mouth curled into a scowl. "He's not here right now." A few seconds paced. "Why? He's arranging a funeral."
Jacob violently replaced the phone, and he began to shake. Bella moved slowly away from him and I grew wary, not liking how compact the Swan residence's kitchen was. If he were to phase we would both catch a claw to the neck. I didn't like our chances of survival, though I'd gladly throw myself behind Bella to preserve my face. That's self-preservation; forgive me for lacking in altruistic will at the time.
Bella moved towards Jacob after watching him fumble for control, like the bitch had yet to grasp he was a fucking werewolf. "Jacob, who was that?"
"Filthy bloodsucker," Jacob growled under his breath.
"I'm not going to ask again. Who the hell was that, Jacob?" Bella was more angry and assertive this second time around.
The back door slammed open and before either of us could say a word Alice came hastily walking from one of the open doors, a terrified expression on her face.
"Bella," she said in a choked tone, approaching Bella and taking her quickly into her arms. "Bella, it's Edward."
"What?" Bella's eyes widened and she glanced at the phone.
"He thinks you're dead, Bella," Alice said, her expression twisting until it looked absolutely stricken. "Rosalie told him why I came here."
"No," Bella said, and her voice came out like a breathless gasp. For a split moment she looked just as terrified as Alice, but that terror quickly became rage. She tore herself from Alice's arms and tried launching towards Jacob—unsuccessfully, might I add. "Why didn't you let me speak to him?! Huh?!"
"He didn't ask for you," Jacob said unapologetically. His eyes were cold and smug.
The next noise that came from Bella's mouth was incoherent. "I don't care!" she screamed at him.
Alice turned Bella to get her attention, arms reaching up to hold Bella's face in her pale, dainty hands. "Bella, he's going to Italy."
Italy, Italy, Italy...
My eyes widened and I lost my sense of hearing. Suddenly, everything was muffled and unfocused. All I could hold onto was that word—that statement, really. Bella's ex-boyfriend was going to Italy. Italy was where the Volturi were located. Volturi was where my father was heading, if not already there biting the hand that feeds.
I reached my hands up and placed both palms on my temples, lightly squeezing my head like that'd bring the world back into focus again. It somehow did.
"He doesn't want you anymore, Bella. Didn't you get the memo when he left you in the woods? I've been there for you through everything. Don't go," Jacob was saying to Bella, begging by the sounds of it.
Bella wouldn't listen, even if Hell froze over. Love made people into fools; lover boy would know. "He'll die! But that's what you want, isn't it? He doesn't deserve to die, Jacob. I don't care what he did to me—I don't care what you want!"
Jacob switched tactics. "What about your Dad?"
"I'm eighteen, I don't need his permission, Jacob," Bella said exasperatedly. "And I'll write a note." Bella turned to look at me, ignoring Jacob's profuse attempts at regaining her attention. "You said your Dad went to the Volturi, right? You should come with us."
God, exactly what I wanted. Here was my chance—coming at me with open arms. But unfortunately, it came to me that I was in a precarious position for someone wanting to hop on a plane to Italy. I had no passport. My wallet was at an airport. I was a Native girl who would likely have to mind-control half the airport to even let me near a plane.
I frowned at Bella. "Now that I'm actively thinking about it, I'm not sure I fit the criteria."
"Don't worry," Alice said, grabbing my attention. "I can forge one. I can try, at least."
"That's better than nothing," I said. I exhaled a sigh of relief. "I've got my bag left in Bella's truck with my stuff. I'm ready to go whenever you all are—"
"Paul wouldn't like that," Jacob cut in.
"Who are you, my Dad? Wait, my Dad's potentially getting his veins sucked dry over in Italy and I'm the only person who gives a fuck," I said all in one breath. "Shut up, Jacob. No one's my keeper, least of all you. I'm going whether you and Paul like it or not."
Jacob didn't say another word. He eyed me like he knew this decision was a reckless, stupid one, but he didn't understand what it felt like to be on the receiving end of an MIA father. Mine wasn't winning any Father of the Year awards any time soon, but he was still my blood and I'd be damned before something terrible happened to him. I was terrified for what was in store, but nothing was worse than losing my father to the Bite. Nothing was worse than being orphaned. Nothing was worse than being totally and utterly alone.
Jacob turned his desperation on the only other mortal in the room. His pleadings to Bella for her to stay, don't go fell on deaf ears, and the time went hasty into the night. Bella spent little more than five minutes gathering a bag of essentials, and then we were hopping in Carlisle's sleek black Mercedes with Alice in the driver's seat. We were on the road heading for Seattle before I could regret my decisions, though there was not a sliver of regret in me.
I knew this was the right decision. I knew I was risking death going near a group of killers who hungered after my bloodline like savages. I knew, I knew, I knew—but I didn't fucking care as much for my consequences than Dad's. There were very few people I'd put my life on the line to save, but one of them was my father, regardless of him fucking me over, regardless of him distrusting me, regardless of him making me hate him like post-shower razor-burn. Not many people could say blood ran thicker than water, but I was one of them.
I just hoped I wouldn't be too late.
A/N: i'm so sorry for this chapter, i've been off my game for a lot of shit lately
Strangunddrum: Thank you so much!
RubberDuckiez: That makes me so happy to hear! Thank you for being here along the ride :)
.2020: Chapter 28 will have an in-depth explanation for why Paul didn't sense when she was in danger, but as of now Alissa is just as clueless! I promise it wasn't an oversight on my part :)
Sting3: Thank you!
climbingvine: That means a lot, thank you! And I understand completely. I based her fatal flaw on one of my own so it would be as realistic as possible, but her actions won't be realistic to anyone who isn't petulant or has destructive idealism. But Alissa is a very petulant, cynical person; she makes reckless decisions to make herself feel good before doing what's good for the bigger picture. I know she does sound like she's just asking for something terrible to happen and if it's not clear from her inner monologue, let's be real- she doesn't care about anything. She's the perfect Slytherin but lacks a little common sense lmao
rairiimakufui: Omg I'm glad! I hope you enjoy today's chapters :)
