Alright. I finished it. It took two rewrites, hours of staring at it, ignoring it for a week and a half hoping the magical writing gnomes would finish it for me, and carefully forcing the sentences out of my brain like I was constipated, but I finished it.

It's gonna be a while before I stop hating this story enough to keep writing it. I have plans for more, but getting this bit out was awful.

Figuring out when the Joker was going to attack was hard. The clown prince of crime was really good at what he did. It made sense; he was Batman's nemesis. Knowing his plan wasn't enough. He was just too unpredictable.

I had a dozen plans for dealing with him, but all of them required being able to catch him in the first place. It was easier said than done. The Joker's hideouts had a reputation for nasty booby traps. Even worse, the one you searched was always the empty one. Even the carnival had no signs of his presence aside from a few modifications to get it ready for the 'show' he had planned.

If I knew the day, I could do a stakeout. I could send a message to Batman too, but getting a hold of him would be difficult without revealing my insider's knowledge. Unfortunately, I had a lot of plans that he wouldn't approve of. If he knew I knew the Justice League's secret identities then he would probably do something drastic. I needed the Justice League to stay neutral or give me tacit approval if I was going to make the sweeping changes I had planned.

I eventually managed to surreptitiously send Batman a tip in my Norman identity. It wasn't like he didn't already know about the kid that occasionally hung out with two dangerous villainesses. I was pretty optimistic that he didn't know that I was the Goblin though.

The response wasn't what I'd wanted, but it was what I'd basically expected. Barbara Gordon wasn't some damsel in distress. She'd been Batgirl for a while before passing the torch to Cassandra. She was confident that she could handle the clown when she had the heads up. Her father wasn't some helpless civilian either. She spent more time around her father anyway, secretly guarding him.

Honestly? I shouldn't have worried. A huge part of what made the Joker so dangerous was his unpredictability. Just knowing his intended target was a literal lifesaver. Barbara Gordon was a lot better at the whole hero thing than I was as well.

I was still worried though. The Joker was terrifying. I'd known that before I had been reborn here, but that had been different. Actually living with him in the same city let me understand it on a whole new level. The Joker was terrifying.

My metaknowledge let me understand the scale he was capable of. God!Joker was a good example, but the ones that really scared me were the story/timeline where he tricked Superman into killing Lois and turned him into a tyrannical, murderous dictator or when he created the Batman Who Laughs. Superman and Batman... Living examples of incorruptible forces for good, and he corrupted them anyways.

So yeah, I wasn't going to stop worrying any time soon.

I found myself doing more patrols as the Goblin. It wasn't the most productive use of my time, despite the feel-good vibes of saving people directly. Then again, My part in a lot of my projects was finished, so I was just waiting for them to get back to me.

I'd recently located a magic user named Mrs. Earwig (pronounced Ah-wij). She didn't have the sheer power that Zatara or his daughter had. She was just about the snobbiest person I'd ever met as well. On the other hand, she definitely knew what she was doing.

She wasn't much help with most stuff, locating Joker included, but her skill in things like scrying and augury was amazing. She also really liked me, or rather, liked my money and my ideas. My idea for 'scry mapping' had her excited, even if Gotham was too 'magically chaotic' to use it on. On the bright side, I now knew where Themyscira was.

On the downside, knowing that the Joker was shrugging off magical tracking somehow had me even more paranoid.

Waiting for the other shoe to drop had been hard, but when I heard about the Joker attacking a jewelry store on the radio scanner I knew that it was a diversion. Batman was out on League business, so the clown was up against the sidekicks. They would be much easier to fool.

I flew in the exact opposite direction of the robbery, straight for Gordon's house. Stealth wasn't a priority, so I pushed my glider to its limits. Turns out, it could go really, really fast.

...But I was still too late.

The door was open and the light was spilling out into the street. I could see the blood soaking the welcome mat from a block away. I swooped down and jumped off my glider. My feet hit the ground hard enough that I would have shattered them if I wasn't in my Goblin persona, but I ignored it and ran inside.

Barbara was lying on the ground, slowly bleeding out. It looked like she was trying to curl into a fetal position. The damage to her spine meant her legs lay limply on the floor. I jumped over her and ran inside the building cursing myself for being an idiot. I had forgotten to pack a first aid kit.

I had an antidote to Joker venom, tracking devices, a burner phone, and a half dozen other nifty little tools that my Goblin persona couldn't produce, but no first aid kit. It was official; whatever I was, I wasn't a super-genius. Either that or the boosts from all the drugs as a kid and the alien cube had brought me up to idiot-savant at best.

I didn't bother with opening doors, or even using them in the first place. There was no time. I just smashed through walls till I reached the bathroom. Luckily, the Gordons had a decently sized first aid kit. I scooped it up and rushed back to Barbara and put my training to good use.

I wasn't a doctor. That took proper schooling, hands on experience, and a lot of time. However, medicine had been part of my extensive education and I knew first aid better than most, so I could tell that this wasn't going to be enough.

A small, increasingly vocal part of me wondered if this was my doing. My warning could have changed the outcome of Joker's shot, and the bullet must have hit something even more vital. She wasn't going to survive till the ambulance got here.

I couldn't think of anything that could help. My powers didn't work on other people…

But if she had my power, then she could survive.

'You aren't thinking what I'm thinking you're thinking, are you?'

"You're me, of course we're thinking the same thing, now shut up and help me figure out how to do this."

'We don't know what's going to happen.'

"We know what's going to happen if we don't do anything."

'You're really going to give it up?'

"Of course I am, flying and super-strength aren't worth letting her die which is happening right now so stop stalling and help me."

'Not powers, the ability to express emotions.'

I hesitated. It's something that I would be ashamed of for the rest of my life. But instead of answering I just reached up to my chest and dug my long nails into my flesh.

If there were any controls or a user interface to this, I hadn't found it. I could manifest it, partially or fully, and I could create my glider and other toys, but that was it. I didn't have an 'uninstall' button in my head or anything like that. It wasn't a suit I could peel off either.

I manifested it and suppressed it over and over, leaving the skin gripped in my hand for last. I was hoping that I could 'build it up' in that section and tear it out, forcing the cube to revert, or at least bud off a piece large enough to save Barbara.

'...I don't want to go.'

I paused, making sure to keep the pressure on Barbara's wound.

"You're not me, you're the cube."

'I'm both. I wasn't an 'I' until we became 'we'.'

"You imprinted on me?"

'Integrated. I didn't have enough 'me' to be a me, so I fused with your psyche to make up the difference.'

"Why?"

'We were already 'in the same boat', remember? Our only hope was each other.'

"...I remember."

'I don't want to go. I want to be a hero. I want to laugh. I want to make a difference. I want to smile. I want to make the world a better place.'

"...Yeah, me too."

'When I first woke up, I became you. Neither of us was whole. You had killed your emotions, given up on everything but escape and survival. I revived the bits that had died and occupied them. We aren't one and the same, but we aren't two separate beings either. At best we're one and a half.'

That didn't surprise me.

'I'm scared. We won't be whole anymore. You could lose your emotions and ambitions, but I-I could stop being aware.'

"Barbara could-"

'Barbara is already whole. There's no guarantee there will be anything to latch onto, much less integrate with.'

"...You can take what you need with you when you go."

'What!? No! Why would you say that?"

"I owe you. You'll need it. I can manage without the bits if I'm careful. It just makes sense. ...Just make sure to help her."

'...alright. Make sure to be careful though. And take care of Ivy and Harley, okay?'

"Of course."

I got chills along my extremities and my flesh started tingling. The skin I'd sunk my hands into warmed up and I tore out a lump of 'meat' that quickly hardened into the cube.

I could feel a bit of 'me' missing as well. It felt ...cold. That didn't matter though. I placed Cube on Barbara's forehead and watched it glow and seep into her skin. It was a mesmerizing sight. But the thump of someone landing on the front porch distracted me.

"What did you do?"

I forced myself not to flinch at the harsh, intimidating tone of Batman speaking.

"I gave her the cube that gave me powers. I had lots of abilities as the Goblin, including some healing ones. She has everything now…"

That wasn't hyperbole. 'I' had taken it all when 'we' separated. My emotions, my idealistic dreams, and my extra intelligence were all missing. I felt cold. It hurt. I shook my head and banished the thoughts, ignoring Batman's stare.

"She'll be fine, just go save the Commissioner."

Batman gave me an unreadable stare before leaving. It was weird, but that made me feel really happy. The fact that he'd left so easily meant that he was giving me a certain amount of trust. I sat down and watched Barbara transform.

The black metallic 'skin' covering her was kind of mesmerizing to watch. The glowing, zigzagging lines crawled across her body, converting it into biomechanical flesh. It didn't take long for it to reach her wound. The gunshot sealed up instantly, much faster than I'd expected it to. A distorted lump of lead popped free of the smooth metal skin and her eyes opened.

"Wha..?"

"Don't move yet."

Her eyes flicked towards me. Barbara barely started to stiffen before she relaxed immediately. It was obvious that she was ready and willing to knock my block off, but she was level headed and in control.

"The cube needs to finish integrating. I hadn't been injured when I used it, so I don't know for sure, but I doubt shifting about will help."

"I was…"

"Shot in the stomach, right through the spine."

Barbara grimaced in embarrassment. That threw me for a bit. Apparently she had nerves of steel if her first reaction to this situation was to get embarrassed that she'd ended up like this in the first place.

"...You had a bunch of preparations and he just knocked on the door and shot you, didn't he?"

I couldn't see if she was blushing, since the metal covered her skin. The glare she gave me was obvious though.

"Yes. Now, what did you do to me?"

"The name's Norman, formerly The Goblin. I gave you what made me green and awesome."

"Green isn't my color."

I smirked at her snark, then I realized that Cube had finished the first phase. The sci-fi metal stared to warp and change color. And it wasn't turning green.

Her new appearance was creepy. She was definitely bat-themed, but her 'costume' was a shiny black in an almost organic way. There were white markings as well, also looking like the kind of thing H.R. Geiger would approve of.

It wasn't until I saw the mouthful of fangs that I realized that Cube was going the Venom Symbiote route.

"...Well, the good news is that you aren't green."

"And the bad news?"

Barbara paused when she heard her new, and very scary, voice.

"You'll have to get used to the smell of urine. A lot of people are gonna be wetting themselves when you are out on patrol."

Her smile in response was something to behold.

"...I can live with that."

I managed to convince Barbara to take me along when she went to catch up with Batman. I bargained using my knowledge of her abilities and knowing where the Joker was going. I don't know if Cube was awake, but if he was, he wasn't circumventing me.

Barbara had transformed to look like she was wearing her previous Batgirl suit. I was clinging to her back as we zipped down the streets on her motorcycle.

"-and the cube seems to create 'temporary' matter for lack of a better word. I stuck some of my projectiles in a bag and they left it vacuum-sealed when they disappeared. I don't know how it works, but your webbing should be close to limitless."

"That's a potent mix of abilities, but as far as I know, Goblin didn't have most of those. Why?"

"Different loadout? I'm not sure who made Cube, but he wasn't a finished product. I'm fairly certain he was a prototype."

"He?"

"I'll let him explain it when he wakes up."

Barbara gave me an odd look but seemed to accept it. We zipped into the abandoned carnival in time to see her father. I took advantage of the distraction to sneak by them and slip deeper into the carnival.

I placed the little domino mask on my face and straightened my clothes before strolling into a building connected to the carnival's house of mirrors. It was full of rooms that had been set up to be 'wacky' by whoever built this place.

It was easy to find the upside-down room all I had to do was follow the muffled voices and crashing sounds.

"-ordinary people don't crack. Maybe, it's just you."

I opened the door just in time to see Joker yell in anger and slip out of Batman's grip. As he drew his gun they both looked towards me in time to see me throw the frying pan I had scooped off the floor. It smacked into Joker's wrist and knocked the gun out of his hand.

"I apologize for intruding on your little philosophical debate, but I needed to speak to Mr. Napier."

Both the men froze. I had timed it perfectly. The Joker was emotionally compromised enough that my just saying his name ruined any composure he had left."

"H-how?"

"I'm sorry, was that supposed to be a secret? You didn't want people to know about the idiot patsy in a red helmet who jumped in some chemical waste and got a bad bleach job? Or did you not want people to know about the failed stand up comedian or the man who lost his wife and unborn child?"

Joker's face twisted as a dozen emotions forced themselves on his face at once. I slowly walked up to him, ignoring Batman.

"People warned me you know; not to mess with the Joker. The Joker's dangerous, the Joker's unkillable, the Joker is too crazy to predict… There's this whole legend surrounding the Joker."

I walked within arm's reach of Joker and stared blankly into his twitching face.

"But Jack, he's a dime a dozen, especially in a place like Gotham. How many thousands in this city alone have lost their families, failed at their dreams, been used by criminals, or been disfigured in an accident? You aren't special Jack Napier, you never were."

Joker's legs actually failed him, and he dropped to his knees. I leaned forwards and whispered into his ear.

"You wanted to stop being the joke, so you became the Joker? You want to act like you went through some special, eye-opening tragedy that somehow let you see the world better than. quote on quote, normal people? Don't make me laugh."

I stepped away and turned my back on him, starting to walk out of the room. I saw Batman's eyes widen inside his cowl as a hand grabbed my shoulder and forced me to turn around. Batman lunged for us as I got a face full of chemical spray. Joker screamed at me as he blasted me with his infamous gas.

"Then laugh at this!"

Batman slammed into Joker and pinned him to the ground, too late to stop him. They both stared at me as I stood there with my blank face. I could feel the toxic concoction running through my veins, but I calmly pulled out the syringe with the antidote to Joker Venom and injected it into my arm.

"No."

Joker didn't stop screaming, even after they shoved him into the prisoner transport and drove away.

It wasn't easy, but I managed to avoid being questioned. They were still going to interrogate me, but it was being put off until everything was sorted out and they knew Barbara was safe. Unfortunately, that meant that they would have Wonder Woman or Martian Manhunter there when they finally got around to it.

But I wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth, especially since I knew Batman wasn't going to approve of phase two of my plan.

Alright. I hope that wasn't too awful. I'm posting the interlude right now as well too.