AN: Here we are! New chapter. I'd like to say thank you to all the readers who are still with me and this story even 26 chapters later. I am having a great time writing it, and in turn reading what you all have to say. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I hope you guys stick around till the end. Enjoy, and sorry for any mistakes.
Every neuron in Lexa's brain fired at once, like tiny warning lights in her head that were telling her she was about to play with fire.
Fireworks.
But like fireworks, the signals in the brunette's head were as dangerous as they were beautiful. She enjoyed that they were making her hyper aware of the teeth that sunk into her lips. She liked that they helped her recall the last time they kissed like this just by the smell of Clarke's perfume. It was dangerous, what she was doing, what they were about to do, but Lexa couldn't fathom breaking away from the warm mouth she was glued to.
Like a kid watching fireworks, she couldn't turn away, no matter how bright and loud the show was.
It was then that Lexa became conscious of the sounds in her ears. Aside from the obvious moans and groans, she heard as much as felt their feet shuffling towards somewhere. Their steps were messy as they scraped at the pavement below, but their feet moved in sync with each other.
When she felt the cold shape of a key ring in her hands, the brunette knew exactly where they were headed. Her body had worked against her, but she felt no fight in her as the key turned in the deadbolt and her fingers worked to open the door.
"When do I get a key?" Those were the first words she had heard her girlfriend utter since she pounced on her in the parking lot, and Lexa admitted she didn't appreciate them much.
So, she shushed her before feeling guilty about it. "Nobody knows I have one." She offered before she kicked the door shut and pulled Clarke back into her to continue their kiss.
"Not on the bar top." The blonde moved away from their kiss with a wet pop. "Please tell me that's not a fantasy of yours." She teased, only partially, as she hoped in the dark that Lexa wouldn't suggest they have make-up sex on the counter.
Again, words that Lexa could do without. She couldn't pinpoint her irritation, but she knew she wanted to hear nothing but their heavy breathing. Except, this time she chose to make it somewhat of an option for the blonde instead of forcing her to keep quiet. "Do you want to do this or not, Clarke?"
Clarke nodded as she moved in to take her girlfriend's lips, her hands holding the defined face captive.
Their lips moved over each other, alternating with unforgiving bites, as Lexa walked them carefully and quickly towards the stairs. "No, not the vanity room." Clarke whispered into the girl's mouth. "Backstage." She bit a plump bottom lip before she stopped again. "Clothes."
A frustrated groan escaped the brunette as she rolled her eyes. Not even the fact that they were tightly shut stopped her from doing so. "We're not having sex on Raven's wardrobe." She finally muttered as she pulled away to look seriously at Clarke.
"OK." The blonde inhaled to calm herself. They were both flustered and annoyed. "Maybe we don't have sex at all." She couldn't believe the words as they escaped her mouth.
Lexa nodded despite the disappointment she felt flood her. "We shouldn't." She bit her lip to keep from contradicting herself with a loud 'fuck it'.
They stood in the middle of the room, cocktail tables neatly lined to the side, as their hearts slowed and their breathing returned to normal. Nothing but the shine from the neon sign outside and the street lights illuminated their forms for one another.
Clarke sighed heavily as she reverted to toying with her zipper once again. A tick of hers apparently, and not one overlooked by her girlfriend. The green eyes across from her caught onto the slender fingers that moved the tiny object up a few teeth and down some.
She inhaled and breathed out with a small laugh before she looked away.
"So…"
"I guess we should…"
They shook their heads, amused by their timing as they interrupted each other.
"I can get that rideshare now. If you think it's best I go, I will." Clarke suggested even though she felt the need to stay rooted in place until they came closer to resolving their issues.
Lexa shook her head slowly before looking away. "No." She finally said. "We have to talk." Her eyes moved back to Clarke's.
The blonde nodded gratefully. "Want to flip a coin this time?" She smiled apologetically.
"I have a better idea." The writer replied as she walked towards the bar. Her fingers worked by memory as they found the switch for the rope lights. The tiny bulbs lit up and reflected off the glass bottles and polished tap handles, but none of them gave off as much of a sparkle as Lexa's eyes. "Want a drink?" She extended her hand towards the empty stool opposite her and smiled when Clarke moved towards it.
The blonde sauntered over and smiled wide. "Are you buying?"
Lexa shrugged as she looked around for effect. "It's on the house."
"In that case, top shelf, please."
"Let's not get carried away." The brunette replied with a grin as she took a bottle of their more expensive whiskey and poured it into two tumblers. "Indra makes tick marks on the bottles every night."
"No, she doesn't. You're terrible." Clarke shook her head, feeling relieved that their banter had not suffered as she feared it would. Hopefully they could keep it all from falling apart if they talked it through thoroughly.
They shared another low laugh before they drank the liquid slowly and in the quiet chaos of their thoughts. Nothing could be heard in the building, and that served as motivation for them to begin.
It wasn't awkward when they trained their glances on each other for several beats. Neither one moving to speak until Lexa looked down at the countertop. "You were right." The writer broke the silence as Clarke looked up from her tumbler with knitted brows. "I was angry because I was scared to get rejected." She admitted. "You were an easier target, so I lashed out on you, but I shouldn't have." They looked at each other before she continued. "Yes, that was wrong, and I'm sorry that I picked a fight with you before I really talked it through."
"If you say 'but', it negates whatever you said before." Clarke whispered, hoping her girlfriend wasn't about to fault her again.
Lexa glared at the blonde playfully before shaking her head in earnest rebuttal. "But…you were wrong in assuming your actions wouldn't affect me negatively somehow. I get why you feel that, but it wasn't all about you doing this for my own good. You knew how I felt about my story and about MPC, and you willingly disregarded my feelings on the issue."
"I honestly didn't think about it that way." Clarke defended.
The brunette nodded. "I know." She poured them another stream of the liquor before proceeding. "At the time I felt you either had no concern for my insecurities, or you did and overlooked it anyway. Either way, I'm still hurt that you can't seem to see you were wrong to force me into a situation I was dreading, and can't say sorry for it."
Clarke sighed forlornly, feeling like an asshole for only then realizing why Lexa was so upset.
They took a moment to swallow some of the whiskey before the blonde nodded with watery eyes. . "I feel like such a dick and the world's most inconsiderate girlfriend." She shook her head with a sorrowful expression.
Lexa shook her head too before tossing back the rest of her drink. "You're not. I'm not saying you are. I just needed to explain why I'm so mad at the situation, Clarke. I now see where we both went wrong, and I want to fix it."
"Yeah." The younger girl nodded. "I do too."
"I hate what this is doing to us both. I just want to be with you. I hate going home alone. I don't like that your side of the bed has been cold these past days. I wake up wishing I could kiss you, and then wishing I wasn't so upset that you aren't there." The brunette sighed as she leaned back to rest on the counter below the bottles of alcohol. "I don't want to assign blame, but I don't want either of us to think we can get away with hurting each other and then fixing it by ignoring it or jumping straight to sex."
The other girl nodded emphatically. "I get it. I do. I never meant to make you feel like I ignored your feelings. I never want you to think I don't care."
Clarke wanted nothing more but to make Lexa believe she never meant to hurt her.
Lexa needed nothing more than Clarke's sincere apology to feel liberated from the anger and hurt she felt.
Another small sigh escaped the brunette as she leaned her head back and closed her eyes. "I know you care, Clarke." She allowed her eyes to travel back towards the blonde a moment later.
"I'm sorry." Clarke spoke before the other girl could say anything else.
Raven laughed out loud as she heard yet another Lexa story from her older sister.
The girl in the passenger seat would not stop talking. Despite several warnings from Raven about possibly peeing herself, Anya kept recounting the best of Lexa's embarrassing moments to the dancer.
"Stop." Raven inhaled deeply as she wiped the tears of laugher with one hand, and held the wheel with the other. "Please, An, stop."
Anya finally grinned and chuckled softly before nodding in defeat. "And that wasn't even my favorite story." She looked out the passenger window knowing the other girl would question her out of curiosity.
The younger brunette sighed in relief at having a moment to really compose herself. "There's a better story than that?"
"Oh, yeah." Anya nodded slowly and with purpose. "I still haven't told you what happened when she tried to get a girl's attention."
"Oh, that one should be good." Raven nodded in agreement. "But please wait till I can empty this bladder before you make my ass laugh like you did just now." She warned.
"Are you closer than Lexa's?" The older girl questioned suddenly.
"Yup, but I can take you to her place, it's no problem really."
"No." Anya replied. "Let's go to your apartment. I want to leave those two alone in case they've made up." She added.
Raven liked the suggestion, and she headed home with her friend. It had been too long since they had talked, and it felt good to be around her again. "Think they got their shit together?" She broke the unexpected silence in the car.
"It's tough to say. You know Lexa can be stubborn, but I know she loves that girl. She'll listen to what she has to say, and she'll find it in her to forgive her."
"Wait, did Lexa tell you she loves Clarke?" Raven asked wide-eyed.
The eldest Silva craned her neck to look at the surprised expression on her friend's face. "Why?"
"Clarke loves Lexa, too." She admitted with an almost gleeful look on her face. Guilt? What guilt?
"Shut up." Anya shifted to fully face her. "This is juicy stuff."
Raven nodded as she tried to keep her eyes on the road and on the girl in the seat next to her. "Juicy indeed. We have lots to talk about."
"You're right." She paused as she knitted her brows together in question. "Hey, are you still infatuated with Bellamy?"
Fuck.
"I'm so sorry for how I made you feel. I promise that next time I will talk to you before I take any action." Clarke expanded on her apology, feeling the need to really emphasize her own disappointment at having hurt her girlfriend.
Lexa shook her head slowly before she walked to the counter and leaned in close Clarke's face. "I'm sorry too, babe." She smiled softly at her before filling their tumblers up one last time. "To relationships."
"To learning from our mistakes." Clarke toasted before swallowing the whiskey in one gulp.
They felt the burn of the liquor and exhaled the fiery flavor before looking at each other. "Will you come home tonight?" Lexa asked, her eyes hopeful, but her heart ready for a possible refusal.
The blonde nodded slowly with a sad smile. "I've missed you."
"It was a few days." The writer commented nonchalantly as if she hadn't missed her girlfriend every day she was away.
"Longest few days ever." Clarke added.
The pair chuckled as they held hands across the bar top. "This doesn't mean you get to have your way with me." Lexa replied as she toyed with the blonde's fingers.
After a dramatic pout, the artist puffed out tediously. "You mean no make-up sex?"
Her girlfriend shook her head. "I'm not that easy." She smiled.
There was no denying Clarke was disillusioned, but after mulling it over in her head, she decided to her mission was to make Lexa give in first. "Challenge accepted, D.C."
Much to Raven's dismay, Anya pushed the discussion towards Bellamy. The one person she had been actively trying to get over.
Not many people knew of her past with the guy. In fact, only one other person at Tassels was aware of her past discretions with the shaggy-haired brunette, but that person swore never to say anything.
So, the dancer was a tad surprised to see that Anya had somehow figured it out.
Lucky guess.
Anya shook her head in response. "Nope. I remember all of Lexa's stories about you batting your eyelashes at your coworkers. I told you. And I was here for some of them. But one I could never remember hearing about was Bellamy. You seemed to steer clear of him. Lexa never mentioned you going after him, so I figured you already had. In secret, and not even my sweet sister, the trusty bartender knew of it."
Damn.
Raven shrugged, accepting defeat with a solemn lopsided smile. "We were both less than sober after some pitchers at Polis Billiards, and it seemed right at the time." She stood from the couch to retrieve the last unopened bottle of wine Clarke had brought over as an offering during her stay. "After that, we had fun a few more times, but he pulled away as soon as Echo joined the crew."
The taller brunette nodded compassionately. "You had already fallen for the kid, though."
"I'm a tough gal, but even I have a heart." Raven admitted with two glasses in her hand and the bottle in the other.
Anya shook her head. "Don't worry; the right person will come along."
A wide smile escaped her. "I hope so." She handed Anya a generous serving of wine with a smirk. "Enough about me, let's talk about Lexa."
They sat comfortably on the couch while the older girl kept track of the story in her mind. Her words dramatically played out what she saw in her mind's eye.
"I swear to you, Lexa went all Lloyd Dobler on that girl." Anya finished with a drink of her glass.
Raven shook her head. "Brown trench coat and boom box?" She asked with an amused expression.
"Yup." The older girl nodded. "Lexa was always really good at getting girls, and this one was no different, but it took her a giant headache to get her. I'm telling you, the girl dropped a planter on Lexa's head before she realized it was her."
"Oh crap." Raven laughed.
"Yeah, I was in the car hoping I didn't have to rush her to the hospital. I saw Lucy coming to the window with it in her hands before Lex did, but there was no way I could have tackled her in time."
"That lucky bitch." Raven laughed. "She totally escaped being killed by a pot of roses."
Anya chuckled before she shook her head. "Roses would have been nice." She paused to drink. "This one had what looked to be a dead heartleaf philodendron."
"No way." Raven laughed harder. "Aren't those super hard to kill?"
"Apparently not."
They shared a laugh as they finished off their drinks in comfortable conversation. "Did the girl apologize? What happened to Lexa's head?"
"Well, Lucy rushed down and couldn't apologize enough. I sat in the car stunned and impressed by the girl's audacity. She could have killed someone, and all she could do was say sorry and kiss my sister over and over, but Lexa survived with a killer headache and a mountainous bump on her noggin."
"Wow. Lexa likes the dramatic ones." Raven teased.
"Clarke's the least dramatic one of all. I'm actually shocked now that I think about it." They laughed. "I mean apart from Costia."
Raven nodded sadly then. "Yeah. Costia was sweet."
"She was." Anya nodded as they drank in silence. "But anyway, what's on the agenda for tonight?"
Clarke had overvalued her will power, and underestimated the sexual magnetism that her girlfriend possessed.
The ride to their apartment had been one of the most grueling and frustrating things the blonde had ever been through. Sitting in the passenger seat had seemed like an easy task at first. Situating herself and buckling her belt with an overconfident smile while Lexa pulled out of the parking lot. Clarke had called it an instant win.
Prematurely.
Not ten minutes later, as Lexa drove up the on-ramp to the highway, Clarke found that the temperature in the car had risen a few degrees.
She accounted that to the fact that Lexa had not switched the fan on like she usually did. Yet, when she cracked her window to let in some of the cool night air, Clarke felt no better and far more anxious.
It was when she realized she had been ogling the brunette beside her that she accepted the true cause for her discomfort. It was quite evident after that. Because the way her girlfriend's jeans hugged her legs, or the way her muscles rippled below the fabric every time she moved her foot off the gas and to the brake, and the way her biceps flexed as her hands gripped the wheel made her mouth water and beads of sweat run down the center of her back.
If Lexa knew what she was thinking and the reactions she was having, she would tease her for acting like a cat in heat, but the blonde found she could care less.
The only thing she cared about was the fact that she couldn't reach over and run her hands down those legs. Or how she couldn't, nay, wouldn't run her fingers up past her biceps until they entangled in those brown wavy strands. Because once she did that, her mission was over, and she would have been the first to crack under pressure, and that was unacceptable. If make-up sex was to happen between them, she wanted Lexa to be the one to initiate it. Not the other way around.
After all, Lexa had been the one to suggest they wait some time.
But life was hardly ever that simple, and plans rarely stood after coming face to face with an opponent.
Which is how Clarke found herself swallowing excessively and scrolling unnecessarily through radio stations, while Lexa sat in peace and grinned over at her girlfriend.
Much to the blonde's luck, her girlfriend was smart and caught wind of what she was suffering through, which spelled disaster for her in an instant.
"Ants in your pants, Clarke?" She had questioned with a gleam in her eye.
It took a second too long for a response to come to mind, but eventually she found her voice. "I'm hot. It's hot. Can we kick up the AC?"
"It's sixty-eight degrees outside, Clarke. Why are you so hot?" The tone in her voice challenged her girlfriend to come up with a clever answer that could help conceal the real cause.
She couldn't, so she shrugged as casually as she could.
"Do you need me to show you how to work it?" The brunette mouthed with a curled lip.
Clarke's eyes widened. "What?" She swallowed again as she tried to even out her breathing.
"The AC, babe." Lexa replied matter-of-factly.
"Oh. No, I got it."
And then it had happened. Lexa had made her move, her one and only real battle strike to make Clarke fall apart. It was silly really, and the blonde couldn't believe her reaction to it, but it happened.
"The far vent has been acting up lately." The brunette kept a trained eye on the road as she leaned across the blonde to feign toggling the lever open and shut. Her knuckles grazed the passenger's torso with the barest hint of lingering, and dark hair fell over to tickle the exposed skin of the girl's chest.
Clarke could hardly stand it as she inhaled the scent that was so familiar and intoxicating to her. There was little she could do to keep her eyes from closing and rolling back as she drowned in the cloud of Lexa's perfume.
Her nearness drew her in and had her nearly colliding her nose with the girl's ear as she swallowed the desire to part her hair and take the lobe between her teeth.
"Oh my god."
"What?" Lexa asked with a concealed smirk as she withdrew and sat back in her seat.
The brunette's question brought Clarke back to earth as she simultaneously realized she had panted the words out loud. "What?" She had nothing better to say, and that was all Lexa's fault.
"We're almost home. I think you're tired." Lexa responded, but smiled as she took the blonde's frown to mean she had conceded the battle.
And win she had because Clarke could hardly exit the car without fumbling like a clumsy fool when they arrived at their apartment building.
Lexa laughed out loud as they neared their door and decided she had had enough. It was fun while it lasted, and she admitted it was sweet of Clarke for trying not to advance on her, but the brunette wanted only one thing as her reward.
Her girlfriend.
TBC…
I think Clarke and Lexa wanted to wait a little for the good stuff, but lets be honest Clexa is crazy for each other and any opportunity to connect is one they won't waste. At least not in this story, damn it! I enjoyed the embarrassing Lexa stories, what did you guys think about Anya and Raven connecting? What do you guys think or want to happen next with those two? See you guys next week.
