Thankfully after a couple days away they had closed the case in New York and were back in Chicago. Thankfully for Jay Erin was still fine and no baby.
They had a late flight so by the time Jay got home to the apartment Erin was fast asleep on the couch, he quietly walked in and placed his things just inside the door. As he was taking his shoes off he heard Erin stir.
"Jay." Erin said as she woke up, looking towards the front door. She smiled when she saw him, happy that he was back and that thankfully he didn't miss anything.
"Hey, sorry I didn't mean to wake you. Why are you on the couch?" Jay said as he walked towards her.
"I was waiting for you, then I fell asleep." Erik shrugged.
"Why were you waiting up for me?"
"I was thinking about things while you were gone, about us." Erin said.
Jay sat down next to her, "Erin I know what you are going to say, I mean I have been feeling things too but we shouldn't, not now anyway."
"I have been waiting for the right time, but there is no...right time or place. I made a mistake...I shouldn't have left when I did."
Jay stopped her resting his hand on her leg, "Erin please don't do this."
"Jay please just let me talk, I need you to know how I feel" Erin said grabbing his hand, "I wasn't in a good place when I left, after everything that happened between us and then things with Bunny I didn't think there wasn't anything worth fighting for so I walked away. Thought everyone would be better off if I just left and I was wrong. I thought things were done between us and it killed me leaving you, Jay if I could change things I would but I need you to know that I still love you."
"So, instead of fighting you just walked away?" Jay said sadly, "Erin I know I screwed up, I shouldn't have pushed you away when I did but that didn't mean we were over I just needed time to sort things out myself."
"I know and I understand that now, that's why I'm saying all this. I want to give us another shot, make things right." Erin said.
"Erin I need you to know that I love you too, so much but this isn't what we need right now. We need to focus on one thing and that's this baby." Jay said, he felt horrible but he knew that rushing back into this at this moment in there life was only going to end in disaster.
"If you really love me then why are you pushing me away?" Erin said with tears rolling down her face.
"I'm not pushing you away I'm just saying not now." Jay said wiping the tears from her cheek, quickly she pushed his hand away and stood up.
"Sorry I'm an idiot, it's just all these pregnancy hormones." She said trying to shake it off, make him think that that's all it was 'hormones' even though she knew it wasn't.
"Erin..."
"No Jay it's fine, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bought it up, your right we need to focus on the baby," She paused, "Look I'm going to head to bed, just forget about this, we're good."
Before he could say anything he watched her hurry into her room closing the door behind her, he knew how crap she was feeling, he was feeling the exact same way. He knew how big of a step it was for her to open up like that but he wanted to do it the right way, he didn't want to rush back into things. Not now and not like this, but he knew one day maybe things could go back to they way they use to be.
The next morning Jay walked out and saw Erin in the kitchen, she was pacing back and fourth. When she saw him she looked up and smiled, "Morning."
"Morning," Jay said walking over to the coffee machine, "Erin about last night."
Erin quickly stopped him, "Jay it's fine, I'm all good."
"Are you sure?"
"Of course." Erin said continuing to pace back and fourth.
"Erin you good? What are you doing?" Jay asked confused as he watched her.
"Just feels good, if I sit or lay down I'm uncomfortable. Might go run a bath."
"Okay, well I have to go we caught a case but just call me if you need anything." Jay said as he grabbed his things.
"No worries Jay, bye." Erin said trying not to be so obvious that she was still hurting from last night.
Erin watched as Jay left all she wanted was to go up and hug him, for him to tell her they were going to be okay and it was all going to work out but he obviously only had one thing on his mind and she wasn't apart of that, not for now anyway. It wasn't a bad thing because it showed her how much this unborn child meant to him but she just wanted another shot.
Later that day Erin still felt quite uncomfortable, she'd had a bath now she was laying on the lounge with a heat pack. She hadn't realised she'd fallen asleep when she woke up by a sharp pain, she nearly lost her breath as the pain took over her body.
"Woah." She said taking deep breaths, was this it? She stood up and started searching for her phone, finally she found it and she dialled Jays number. Of course straight to voice mail, really of all days?
As it got to his message bank she took a deep breath as she left a rather calm message, "Hey Jay, it's just me. Call me when you get this."
After about half an hour Erin had experienced three contractions, so she assumed she was in early labour. Still Jay didn't answer his phone, what the hell was he doing?
She gave in and decided to ring the district. Although it wasn't go time right now she knew he'd want to be there for her as well as she needed him there.
