It was a day later and it was the first time Erin had left the house, her and Jay were taking Lillian out for the first time.
They'd been sitting down for less the half an hour and Jay couldn't help but notice the numerous times she had checked on their daughter, he didn't blame her but he wanted to talk about them and he couldn't do that when she kept getting distracted.
"Hey Erin, if you want to go back home we can?" Jay asked as he quietly sat there spping on his coffee.
She didn't say a word just continued to gentle push the pram back and fourth, Jay continued saying her name to gain her attention. Finally she snapped out of her bubble, "Sorry what?"
Jay chuckled then leant forward, "Erin she's okay, you don't have to keep checking on her she will make a sound when she needs something."
"I know, I'm sorry I'm ridiculous. I just don't want to take my eyes off her since what happened...I'm sorry, this is our first time out of the house and I'm screwing it up, sorry." Erin said very apolitically.
"Stop apologising, I cant get angry at you when I know your just doing what you thinks best for our daughter. She's lucky to have you." Jay smiled.
"She's lucky to have us," Erin paused, "Jay Thankyou for everything, I know me coming back was a shock especially coming back pregnant but you have been there for me and I just realise now that I wouldn't have been able to do it without you."
"I'm glad you came back." Jay continued smiling then a waitress came and interrupted them taking their food order.
Jay sat there smiling as he watched Erin, he could tell she was trying so hard not to check on Lily, he turned his wrist as he checked his watch, "Wow, you haven't checked on her in a while four minutes."
Erin rolled her eyes and chuckled quietly, "Shutup, your just as bad."
"Yeah maybe," Jay paused, now that he had her attention now was the time to ask all the questions, "Erin I need to ask."
"Ask what?" Erin said, knowing exactly what he wanted to know. What were they, were they a couple, were they going to go slow, what did their kiss mean, did they still love each other, was she going to move back?"
"Everything that happened when you were in labour and after, how we were I don't regret that. It's just I need to know what that means for us? I mean, we haven't spoken or done anything since then."
"If your asking if I still love you, of course. I never stopped Jay." Erin smiled, reaching over to take his hand.
"Then what happens with us? Are you going to move back to New York?" Jay said waiting anxiously for her to answer, he didn't want that. He couldn't watch her walk away with his child.
Erin stayed silent for a few seconds, she could feel Jays tenseness from across the table, "No."
"No? Seriously?"
"Yeah, I'm sorry I didn't bring it up sooner I guess I just wanted to have an adult conversation without getting distracted," Erin smiled, "I already made up my mind when we were in the hospital, I need you and Lily needs you. We aren't going anywhere."
Jay felt his whole body relax, that's all he need to know. Now for the next thing, what were they? Would she stay living with him? Would they try make 'them' work?
"So...what about us? What are we?"
"Jay, honestly?" She said looking at Jays face, she didn't want to hurt him anymore, "I don't want to hurt you and I don't want to wreck what we have going on here but I just feel like we shouldn't rush into anything at the moment and our attention should be on her, not us."
Jay nodded without a smile, was he hurt sure. But for some reason he didn't feel like that was a 'it's never going to happen' more of a 'maybe one day' type of thing.
"I get it, she's probably going to be taking up all our time and energy from now on anyway." Jay smiled turning the pram around so he could admire Lily.
"We will make it work Jay." Erin smiled, hoping to get one back.
"I know we will, we always do." Jay said returning a smile.
"Do you want us to move out?" Erin asked.
"No, definitely not. I want to be able to help, I know I'm going back to work and it's going to be hard and a lot to handle but it will make it easier knowing I get to come home and see you guys." Jay said.
"Okay, sure. Thanks. But seeings though I'm not going to be needing my New York apartment I will pay rent."
"So what are you going to do about that? I mean most of your stuff is still in New York."
"Yeah, Hanks going to sort it out for me and store some things at his place."
"That's another thing I have been thinking about." Jay said, looking over at Erin who was pushing her food around.
"You have sure been doing a lot of thinking." Erin chuckled, looking down at her food that for some reason she was not enjoying.
"Erin is something wrong? Are you not hungry or do you not like it?" Jay said putting his fork down, he couldn't talk to her when she was distracted it was putting him off.
"Sorry, no. The things I use to like when I was pregnant don't sit as well anymore." Erin said awkwardly as she pushed the plate away and started eyeing Jays burger that sat in front of him.
Although she had ordered some type of sandwich that had some weird ingredients on it, he didn't want her to starve and she needed to eat in order to feed their baby, so as always he switched his meal with hers. No matter what she always had food envy.
"Thankyou." She said as she quickly started eating the rest of Jays burger, as Jay ate her weird sandwich, trying not to pull any faces at the taste.
"Anyway so what I was saying about what I was thinking about, if your going to stay then we should probably look at moving somewhere else down the road."
Erin looked up at him confused, "What? Jay your place is fine and I don't exactly think we should be house shopping together, we know how that went last time."
"I'm not saying we should buy a house and for now my apartment is fine but what about what Lily gets a little bigger. You and her barely fit in your room as it is, we will need a bigger place." Jay said, he had thought long and hard about this, hoping that she would be staying.
"I guess your right, but honestly the last thing I feel like doing at the moment is looking for somewhere else to live, so can we just wait a couple months?"
"Sure, now I think this little ones about to wake up." Jay said as he pulled the blanket from the pram as Lily started to stir.
And just like clockwork her little lungs started working overdrive as she let Erin, Jay and the rest of the cafe know it was time for her to eat.
