First defense class of the year guys, what do you think will happen?


The morning after the Sorting Feast was an interesting one. I felt it was probably for the best to sit with my new housemates, at least for their first day, before returning to sitting with the twins like I had all last year. Honestly, setting an example seemed exhausting, and it was only the first day of term.

I helped myself to a pile of bacon and eggs, waving brightly at my Gryffindor buddies from across the room. The enchanted ceiling was a dull, cloudy grey that morning, and I could tell from my seat that Hermione was attempting to match it with her attitude.

There was a whoosh as the morning post arrived, and my new housemates stared in awe at the hundred or so owls that flew in, circling the hall until they spied the recipient of whatever they carried.

I giggled a bit as the Weasley owl, Errol, crash-landed in the milk jug. But my snickers turned to awed horror when I saw the red envelope in his beak.

"Oh boy."

Ron took enough time gathering his courage to open it that I was able to reach up and plug my ears. Just in time too, as Mrs. Weasley's voice echoed through the Great Hall.

"-STEALING THE CAR, I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SURPRISED IF THEY EXPELLED YOU. YOU WAIT UNTIL I GET A HOLD OF YOU, I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU STOPPED TO THINK WHAT YOUR FATHER AND I WENT THROUGH WHEN WE SAW IT WAS GONE-"

The plates and spoons on the tables rattled as the woman's voice echoed a hundred times louder than normal. Everyone in the hall was turning to see who the unfortunate soul was that received a howler, and even those outside were poking their heads in to catch a glimpse. Ron, for his part, was sunk so low in his chair I could just see the top of his head.

"-LETTER FROM DUMBLEDORE LAST NIGHT, I THOUGHT YOUR FATHER WOULD DIE OF SHAME. WE DIDN'T BRING YOU UP TO BEHAVE LIKE THIS, YOU AND HARRY COULD HAVE BOTH DIED-"

I was wondering when Harry's name would pop up.

"-ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED – YOUR FATHER IS FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK, IT'S ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT AND IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE WE'LL BRING YOU STRAIGHT BACK HOME."

My ears rang even through my fingers, but it finally fell silent. The envelope burst into flames before their eyes, and the boys sat, stunned, as the hall returned to its normal chatter. After all, there were other things to think about, the professors were beginning to come around with time tables.


Classes began with little fanfare for those not in the second year Gryffindor classes. I had double Charms with the Slytherin's first, so I headed upstairs but was plowed over by a blur of red hair.

Books flew everywhere, and I scrambled to help pick them up. Ginny, for that's who hit me, apologized profusely as she took her stack of things.

"I'm looking for Transfiguration." She admitted.

"Right. Up this hall on your left, Gin. Don't be afraid to ask for help."

I ended up waving as she took off again, thanking me over her shoulder.


Flitwick was understanding of my being late since I told him I was guiding a first year, but that meant the only available seat was next to Draco Malfoy.

"Draco."

"Cousin." He didn't seem pleased, but we got through the lesson with no problems. He appeared content to leave me be as long as Harry was not around.


My next class was DADA with Gryffindor, and the class was gathered in the doorway when I walked up.

"What's happening?" I whispered to Hermione, making her jump.

"One of the first years is a little star-struck with Harry. He asked for a signed photo, and Lockhart overheard. He's now giving Harry career advice, and we got a bit distracted from classes."

Ron snorted. "A bit. The man's obsessed with using Harry to boost his own fame."

Hermione was about to retort when the crowd finally moved into the classroom. I took my seat between the pair of them, trying to head off any arguments. I heard Ron teasing Harry about the kid, Colin Creevey, starting a Harry Potter fan club with Ginny, then Lockhart called for quiet.

He took Neville's copy of Travels with Trolls and held it up to show his own, winking face on the front.

"Me," he said, pointing to it and winking as well. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Forces Defense League, and five-time winner of Witch's Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award, but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!"

He waited for us to laugh, but I wasn't about to stroke his ego.

"I see you all bought a complete set of my books-"

"It was on the required list?" I muttered.

"Well done. I thought we would start today with a little quiz. Nothing to worry about- just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in-"

He handed out sheets of parchment and returned to the front of the class.

"You have thirty minutes, begin!"

I flipped over my paper and read:

1 What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite colour?

2 What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?

I felt my face flush and heard Hermione gasp as my hair turned a matching shade of crimson.

"Is this real?" I asked out loud, ignoring Hermione's elbow to my ribs.

"Excuse me miss-" Lockhart began to check the seating chart.

"These question's are all about you," I stated.

"These question's were taken from your course books, Miss Black."

I nodded once, standing from my seat and collecting my bag. "I will take a Troll. I am going to my Head of House." And before he or Hermione could sputter a response, I marched out the door and down to the Transfiguration classroom.


"Miss Black?" McGonagall questioned as I walked in on the fourth year Gryffindor's and Hufflepuff's.

"I refuse to participate in Lockhart's farce of a class, the test he just handed us asked his favorite colour. I will accept whatever punishment you choose to give me, but I won't be returning to his class."

McGonagall blinked but agreed to discuss it further after class. She turned back to her lecture, just missing the wink I shot the twins.

I seated myself on the floor beside the professor's desk and pulled out my Charms notes, taking the opportunity to work on my homework.

After an awkward meeting between McGonagall, Lockhart, and myself, it was decided that I would spend my DADA period with McGonagall and attempt my midterms through self-study.

"If Miss Black can earn acceptable marks, then she will be allowed to continue to study on her own, if she cannot, then she will return to classes." McGonagall looked as though she was containing her laughter as Lockhart sputtered his protests. Something about students showing respect to their teachers...

I didn't stay to listen, having been dismissed by McGonagall, I headed down to dinner.