I'm back! Everyone I'm sorry for being MIA, the last couple months has been a rollacoaster. My parents opened a cafe, I quit my full time job to work there and I'm loving it but the first week my mum ended up in hospital so I was doing crazy hours so I had my mind elsewhere! But it's all gone to normal and I'm finally in a routine and loving it! So I'm back! My mind is fresh, still open to some ideas! I'm going to go back and look at comments that were posted giving some ideas.
Anyway I hope you are eager to continue reading and I will finish this story! Don't worry!
"Ah Jesus, mother of..." Erin shouted, "If you keep biting me I'm going to have to stop feeding you. Not completely, just with my boobs."
Alec whimpered, "Yeah well, they're my boobs too, and that hurt. That really hurt." Erin said in pain as Alec continued to be unsettled.
Jay came in from the ensuite, hair dripping wet and a towel wrapped around his waist. Even though Alec was crying, she was completely in a day dream.
These last six months had been tough on everything, their marriage, their family, their work life and their sex life.
Jay had taken over intelligence. Three months ago Hank had retired, to everyone's surprised. But he felt like it was time and especially time Jay stepped up and so Jay did.
He had the conversation with Erin and they both said no matter what they would make it work, it's not like they didn't exactly know what they were in for.
Unfortunately though with a three month old and a nearly four year old it was hard. Harder then they thought it would be even with all the helping hands.
Erin's bubble was about to be popped though, she had to go back to work. Work with Jay as her boss, she didn't exactly know how to feel about it. She was so proud of Jay but him now being her boss, she wasn't sure how their relationship was going to affect the job. Of course he kept saying it wouldn't and he'd keep things professional but she wasn't so sure.
"Babe…babe…BABE!"
Jay shouted causing Erin to shake out of her thoughts, "Sorry what?"
"Let me take him," he bent down and gracefully picked up Alex and began rocking him, which quickly soothed him, "You okay?"
Erin adjusted her top and smiled weakly, "If he keeps it up we are changing to formula, he's killing me."
Jay chuckled, "Miss Lily didn't get her teeth so quick, your mum might stop feeding you little dude."
"Yeah I doubt it. Anyway how about you put him down and we do a little bit of exercise before you go to work?" Erin raised an eyebrow.
"I can't babe I need to go, I'm sorry." Jay said passing Alec back to his mother.
"Yeah sure, no worries."
Jay noticed Erin's unpleased tone, "What?"
"Nothing, go it's all good. I have to get up and take Lily to daycare anyway."
"Babe…"
Erin shook him off and started walking out of the room, "Go to work Jay."
Jay sat in his office rubbing his temples as he finished off the most recent busts paperwork, he couldn't get his mind off this morning though, there was definitely something wrong with Erin but he couldn't quite put a pin on it. Was it because he was working a lot lately? Was that it?
"Uh Jay? You there bud?" Ruzek said standing in front of his desk, Jay looked up confused, "I did knock, a couple times actually but…"
"What's up Ruze?"
"You okay man?" Adam genuinely asked.
Jay chuckled his pen onto the desk and slouched back in his chair, "I have no idea man, Erin's been acting…Well I don't know how exactly but somethings off."
"Oh really?" Adam said oddly and Jay could tell that he knew something.
"You know something. Adam tell me."
Jay came in the door furious, he quickly put his badge and gun away and walked into the kitchen where Erin was dancing around with Lily in one arm and Alec in the other, Lily was giggling wildly. All of his anger that he had went out the window, it was his fault she felt like this, no one else's. He had promised nothing would change and that he'd still put his family first but he hadn't. Yeah Erin may have confided in a friend instead of him and he was hurt by that but could he blame her?
"Daddy!" Lily screamed and quickly squirmed out of Erin's arms.
"Hey Lil bear!" He said happily and swung her around in his arms.
"Your home early."
Jay smiled, "We need to talk."
"Okay, it's bedtime for these two anyway I just gotta read a bedtime story to Lil and feed Alec."
"You feed him, I got her." Jay smiled.
"You sure?"
"Yeah I'm sure." He said kissing his wife's cheek and sons forehead before walking off.
Jay leaned in the doorway, "Er I'm sorry."
"Sorry for?" She said not taking her eyes off the book infront of her.
He walked over and grabbed the book, placing it on the table and looking at her in the eyes, "I'm sorry because I have been everything I said I wouldn't be since Alec was born."
"It's fine Jay, I understand." She shrugged.
"Yeah but you shouldn't have to. I spoke to Adam, he knew more about what's been going on in your head for the last two months then I have and that's not how a marriage works."
"I just…We miss you."
Jay could see the tears forming in his wife's eyes and it killed him, "I have no excuses."
"You uh missed the bring your dad to school day yesterday. I didn't want to tell you because I know how much it would break your heart but Lily was heartbroken, I mean she got over it quickly but she had a full blown meltdown at preschool, she couldn't believe it when you came home early tonight."
Jay squinted his eyes shut, cursing himself, "She didn't want to go to sleep when I read to her, just wanted to sit and chat with me. I feel horrible, I'm a horrible dad."
Erin shook her head, "No your not a horrible dad, just some recent teething issues, we are all learning how to be a family of four now with you running the unit. It will get better…I hope."
"It will, I will lean on the team more. I will try to get home more for bedtime and I swear I won't miss anymore days like that. I won't turn into my father."
"Thankyou for being okay, I thought you'd be furious knowing I told Kim."
"I mean I was fuming, the fact that Adam knew about personal things happening in our marriage and the fact you felt like you couldn't tell me, killed me and made me furious. But walking in to you like that in the kitchen with our two beautiful monsters, I couldn't be angry with you when you were only letting your emotions out. I'm glad you talked to someone anyway, just sorry it wasn't me."
"Promise next time I will come and talk to you."
He took Erin's hand in his, "And I promise I will be better."
"I love you."
"Love you more," he leant in for a kiss, chuckling when he pulled back, "There was another thing too, did you talk about our sex life aswell?"
She shrugged, "Women tend to talk to each other about everything and anything, didn't think Kim will tell Ruzek that side of things."
"Well she did, I mean maybe a bare minimum amount but he said he was surprised because we have always had a good sex life. Which we have and once again it's on me. I can't use the fact that we have a newborn anymore because he's three months old. I can't keep using the I'm tired and it's too late either.
"Or the I have to go to work," She said bluntly which caused Jay to frown, "I just thought you may not be as attracted to me anymore." Erin continued and shrugged sadly.
"Hell no. No way, I could never not. In fact I think we get Will to babysit this weekend and we take a trip? Get the spark happening again and to remind myself what I'm missing."
"I like the sound of that, he might have his hands full though and Natalie is due any day now."
"Okay maybe we ask Hank?"
"He'd love that. Thanks Jay, seriously."
"Don't thank me, not until things change."
"Shake on it?"
"Maybe we can do something else?" He said raising his eyebrow seductively."
"Oh..I think we can have that arranged." Erin agreed pulling him down to kiss her, god she'd missed him.
