Chapter 16: Old Sorrows

Aelwyne stood in front of the mirror in the intern's locker room with her makeup bag trying to hide the bags under her eyes as well as the bruises that refused to fade. The second week of recovery had come and gone. Her ribs though sore had healed perfectly which had Callie very happy. However she had insisted that in these first few days she took it slow, no long surgeries and no heavy lifting just yet. Thanks to that after rounds she had been assigned to Addison because she was the only attending to have only 2 scheduled surgeries. Bailey had suggested she try and cover her bruises a bit more after some of the patients got nervous when they noticed them. So there she was trying to cover them more but she was failing miserably at the task.

"Need a hand there?" The familiar voice of the gorgeous attending filled the quiet room.

Addison stood at the doorway with an amused smile. She was already dressed in her salmon pink scrubs. She made her way over to Aelwyne a soft chuckle escaping her lips.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be late. It's just… I can't hide them. And Bailey said to hide them. But I can't make it work. " Aelwyne responded waving the makeup brush frustratingly.

"Why don't I help you with that then?" Addison said with a chuckle and taking the brush she was holding.

"Here, sit." Addison directed towards the bench. Aelwyne did as she was told.

"I heard they moved the trial." Addison said as she started to apply more concealer.

"Yes, they did." Aelwyne said quietly.

"Are you ok?" Addison asked.

"Everyone has been asking me that. I'm fine." Aelwyne responded with a sigh.

"Sorry." Addison said quickly.

"No I get it. People want to make sure I can function. I mean who would like to deal with the damaged intern." Aelwyne said, forcing a chuckle.

"You are not damaged." Addison said, stopping her movements and meeting her eyes. "You are not. You've been hurt and that's all. People have been asking because they care about you. At least that's why I'm asking. I just want to make sure you are ok."

"Sorry." Aelwyne whispered, dropping her gaze. "I'm ok."

"I think I'm done. Want to take a look?" Addison said after a few minutes with a smile.

Aelwyne went to the mirror and sure enough the bruises were covered. It was like magic. She smiled at herself in the mirror and then turned to Addison with a smile.

"Alright then. I hope you're ready. We have two surgeries this morning." Addison said walking out.

"I'm so ready." Aelwyne quickly followed.


The two surgeries had been a success and lunchtime found them in the cafeteria which was packed. They found an empty table and sat together.

"I forgot to grab a fork." Addison said as she set the tray down.

"Me too." Aelwyne said, moving to stand up.

"No, no. You stay, I'll go get us some." Addison said and walked away.

"Aelwyne!" Called Cristina as she approached with Meredith.

"Hey guys." Aelwyne said with a smile.

"I'm starving. Also why are there so many people here." Cristina said sitting down followed by Meredith.

"I think there was a conference for the robotics department or something like that." Meredith said as she started to eat.

"Umm guys…" Aelwyne started but was interrupted by Addison who had come back.

"Hello." She said as she handed Aelwyne a fork and sat down.

"Hi Dr. Montgomery." Cristina said with a smile. "I think we have very bad timing." She added, earning a glare from Aelwyne.

"Hi." Meredith followed.

"Are you ok with eating with us? Being an attending and all." Cristina asked.

"I don't see a problem. Besides there are no tables." Addison simply said and began to eat.

"Dr. Bailey, want to sit here?" Meredith called as she noticed their resident walking around with her tray looking for a spot to sit.

"I guess this will do." She responded sitting with them.

As they began to eat Aelwyne started shifting on her chair thanks to the wicked grins Cristina would throw at her and an oblivious Addison. Meredith seemed to pick up on it and elbowed her on the ribs to which Aelwyne chuckled a bit.

"So Ael how was it being at home in your own bed after 2 weeks in here?" Cristina asked, attempting to make conversation.

"It was… ok? I mean we practically live here already. I think it was weird to be home." Aelwyne said.

"That loft is amazing, Ael." Meredith said as she stole a fry from Cristina.

"It really is. Like how much is the rent there? Meredith let's move there." Cristina said, moving her try of fries away from the blonde.

"I don't know how much the rent would be." Aelwyne responded and reached for a fry.

"What do you mean? How much rent do you pay?" Meredith asked.

"Well I don't really pay rent." Aelwyne said quietly after having stolen another fry.

"You… wait, you own the place?" Cristina said taking the tray away from Aelwyne too.

"Yes. I own it." Aelwyne said even more quietly than before.

"Aelwyne are you like rich? You're rich aren't you? You have a nice car and an even nicer place. You're rich." Cristina concluded.

"Sorta." Aelwyne mumbled tensing slightly. She was afraid of the change. Because there was always a change once people knew.

"That's cool I mean look at our trio. I'm from Beverly Hills and I'm me so I'm famous," Cristina winked at that. "Meredith is Ellis Grey's daughter, so pretty much medical royalty, and you are rich. We have it made." She smiled as did Meredith next to her. Meredith stole another fry and Cristina slapped her hand away. "Get your own! You too." She added, looking at Aelwyne and all three burst into laughter. Aelwyne relaxed after seeing her friends were still her friends.

"Behave children. Eat." Bailey ordered.

"Dr. Montgomery you and Dr. Bailey should see her loft. Like really it's so awesome and the view from the living room." Cristina continued after a few bites. "Like I think you'd like it a lot Dr. Montgomery."

Aelwyne dug into her salad shifting nervously and glancing at the redhead from the corner of her eye. She was unsure of whether she was comfortable having others know or if she would not. But then if they knew then there would be a need for explanations because Cristina was pushy, especially when it had to do with Aelwyne and Addison. She still did not know how Izzie, George, Alex, and Meredith had kept the secret. No one spoke of it. Of the fact that Addison had spent a night with Aelwyne in said loft.

"I guess it would be nice to actually find a place. So I'm not living in a hotel forever." Addison said with a smile.

Aelwyne snapped her head fully as she said that and Addison met her eyes, smiling sweetly at her. A blush crawled up her neck to her cheeks and her heart raced as she took in the smile. Then she broke eye contact and faced Cristina and Meredith, who both wore knowing smirks on their faces.

"Sooooo how was it? How did she do?" Callie asked behind her, getting the attention of everyone on the table.

"She did great." Addison replied with a smile.

"Huh?" Aelwyne was confused.

"You had two surgeries this morning. How are your ribs?" Callie asked.

"Oh. Good not much pain. Just a bit sore. But you said it was normal." Aelwyne added quickly as she noticed the concern in Addison's face.

"True. Anyway as long as there's no sharp pain everything is good." Callie responded with a smile. "Well I gotta go. Have surgery. My patient broke both of her legs throwing herself from the second floor of her college dorm to a snow bank on some bet. She miscalculated and landed outside of it."

"Wow not very smart is she." Cristina chuckled slightly.

"Not at all but hey, I get to play now." Callie said with an excited smile and left.

"Could you imagine the call to her parents? Too many idiots out in the world." Bailey mumbled.

"I wouldn't want my mother anywhere near me." Cristina said.

"We know." Said both Meredith and Aelwyne and they started laughing.

"You shouldn't have called her you know." Cristina huffed.

"It was kinda major surgery." Aelwyne replied.

"It was. You were bleeding out." Addison added and Bailey hummed in agreement.

"I didn't ask for her. Also why didn't we call yours? I should've looked for their phone number. Make you suffer like I did." Cristina said, rolling her eyes.

"You wouldn't have found a number." Aelwyne said softly returning to her food.

"Did you not give them your mother's phone number? Who did you list as your emergency contact?" Cristina asked incredulously.

"Cristina why are you so nosy." Meredith said, noting the sudden shift in Aelwyne.

"What? I just want to know who she put as emergency contact so I can do the same." Cristina chuckled. "So?"

"The company's lawyer." Aelwyne responded.

"What?" Cristina said. "Company's lawyer? What the hell Ael. Why not your family?"

"There is no one to put as emergency contact." Aelwyne replied softly.

"What do you mean?" Cristina pushed.

"My family is dead." Aelwyne said quickly. Everyone stopped eating and was quiet after that.

"I… I'm sorry Ael. I didn't mean to. I didn't know." Cristina apologized.

"I know. Anyway I'm done. I'm going to go check on the last patient. She should be up by now." Aelwyne said getting up and walking away.

"She didn't finish eating." Cristina whispered.

"You're an idiot." Meredith said, shaking her head.

"But I didn't know." Cristina said sadly.

"You're still an idiot. How did you not notice she was uncomfortable?" Bailey said with a frown.

"I'm gonna go check on my patient too." Addison said and got up to leave.

"Dr. Montgomery, please make sure she's ok." Cristina asked.

"Right." Addison said and left.

As she left she heard Bailey still going off on Cristina along with Meredith but she paid no mind to their words. She made her way to the OB floor looking for the intern. After seeing her face and looking in her eyes she could tell she was not ok. She had noticed how the brunette had tried to blink away the pain and failed.


Addison went to the first patient who was now resting. Then she went to the next who smiled as she popped her head in and thanked her for everything she had done. She was confused. Aelwyne had said she would be here but she was not. She decided to check at the nurses station but there was no sign of the intern. A nurse had told her that the young doctor had not been there since before lunch. Addison leaned back on the counter as she felt someone approach. She turned with a smile hoping it was Aelwyne but it was not, it was Derek.

"Hello to you too. I'm very happy to see you." He said sarcastically noticing her smile dissolve into a frown.

"I thought you were… never mind." She sighed. "You need something?"

"A consult but it can wait until later in the afternoon. As for your someone…" he said softly.

"Derek." She warned scanning the place and turning to him.

"I saw them in the elevator no idea where they were going but even when they forced a smile their eyes were red." He said without revealing too much about who he spoke of.

"Thank you. I'll find you later for that consult. Is that ok?" She asked. She had an idea of where she could find the intern now.

"Yeah it's not urgent. Let me know if I can help with them." He said with a nod and walked off.

Addison was pretty certain of where the intern had gone. She told the nurses to page her if there was anything truly urgent which would require her attention and made her way to the elevator. As she pressed the button to the fifth floor she hoped the girl was ok, she was really worried. Aelwyne had never mentioned her family at all. It was true she had never asked but still.

The elevator ding dragged her away from her thoughts and she made her way out trying very hard to just walk instead of running. She arrived at the room full of boxes going all the way to the ceiling. The room was dark aside from glimpses of light shining through the cracks between the boxes. She made her way through the maze of boxes carefully. It had been tricky without the intern guiding her like the first time she had been here. After a few wrong turns she found her way to the opening in front of the window. She was glad she had been right.

Aelwyne sat with her back to the boxes, her knees to her chest and her head laying on them. Addison moved quietly and sat next to her in silence. She looked out the window to the already gray sky. The clouds full of rain, ready to pour down, looked amazing.

"You really know how to pick a spot." Addison said quietly.

"My nana told me once I resembled my mother when it came to these things. Apparently she had a knack for finding hidden gems." Aelwyne spoke softly.

"Cristina is sorry." Addison not knowing what else to say.

"I know. I just needed a minute. I don't really talk about them." Aelwyne responded, finally lifting her head revealing the tears running down her cheeks.

"We don't have to talk about it. We can just sit." Addison said with a smile.

"I've gone soft here. I've gone too soft." Aelwyne whispered.

"What makes you say that?" Addison asked.

"Too many… too many tears. My nana would be disappointed. Neirhem Ashenryver's don't cry. They are strong." Aelwyne chuckled slightly. The name clicked in Addison's brain but stayed quiet about it.

"Neither do Forbes Montgomerys. Yet I have done it so many times already that I'm beginning to think it's just a myth." Addison chuckled as well. She noticed a box of tissues in the corner, reached for it and handed it to the intern.

"Thank you." The intern said with a sad smile and took a few.

"I think I have to talk about it, my family." Aelwyne said as she scooched over and leaned on Addison. "I'll just need your shoulder."

"It's all yours." Addison said and waited quietly for her to begin.

"It's a little funny but all four of my grandparents were only children as well as my parents, Edrick and Noelle. My parents moved to Boston from England. To expand their parents' medical equipment and robotics company. I was told they were a happy couple. They married rather young and met when my grandparents decided to merge their companies together." Aelwyne recited all of that as if she told a story from a news magazine. Addison knew it was a defense mechanism.

"That's the boring part I guess." Aelwyne said and continued after taking a deep breath. "My parents wanted their family to grow. They didn't want just one kid they wanted more. First they had a boy, Wyatt. Then a girl, Taegan. They were happy with having just them but I guess it didn't work out that way because my mom got pregnant with me a few years after Taegan was born."

Aelwyne stopped talking for a few minutes and Addison could tell she was mentally preparing herself for the next part. She thought of stopping her but it seemed she wanted to talk, she needed to talk, so she stayed quiet and took the intern's hand in hers. After a few deep breaths she began once more.

"My grandparents came to visit a month before I was due. My parents had a house out in the country away from the city so they decided to go there to spend the next few weeks. My grandparents were following behind my parent's car. They had to leave late afternoon because of some last minute company meetings. The sky was clear though, no rain or snow. Everything was fine." Aelwyne shuddered before she started once more. "An 18-wheeler in front of them lost control and hit another one. My parents had no room to evade and neither did my grandparents. My grandparents' car went up in flames. My parents' car got crushed under an upturned trailer. My dad, my brother, and my sister died instantly. My mother barely survived and was taken to the hospital." Aelwyne's voice grew monotone as she spoke. Addison silently allowed tears to fall down her cheeks.

"She made it… she made it to the hospital and they were able to stabilize her. She was 36 weeks pregnant and I miraculously survived the whole ordeal. My nana met her there, she told me my mother looked awful." Aelwyne said her voice breaking now.

"Aelwyne. You don't have to-" Addison tried to stop her then but Aelwyne interrupted her.

"I know, but I want to. I need to." Aelwyne said taking a few more deep breaths before continuing. "My mother knew she had little time so she told my nana she needed her lawyer. Papers were drawn so that my nana had custody of me. Also she left instructions to keep me inside of her for as long as possible. They rushed her to surgery after surgery for 5 days because of internal bleeds popping out of nowhere. The last one was on her brain which caused a seizure. During that surgery she lost all brain function so she was put in a ventilator."

Aelwyne got up and walked to the window. Addison looked up at her tears in her eyes not knowing what to do or say. She knew what was coming next.

"Sh-she became m-my incubator. They managed to keep her alive for 2 more weeks. Then I was born. My nana took care of me for a long time. However it seems like having a family or some semblance of it, isn't in the cards for me, because two days after my undergrad graduation she… she died too." Aelwyne said and her whimper made Addison get up quickly and take her in her arms.

Addison just held her as she sobbed, her whole body shaking with force. Addison's heart broke as she heard the pain in the brunette's voice as she wept. The intern just held onto her burying her face on her chest. She did not know what else to do but hold her. She held her because it was clear to her how the girl had never allowed herself to be like this. She could tell she had kept her pain locked inside for so long. She thought of her own family filled with cheaters and liars but still alive but this girl... this girl had come to the world and her whole family was already gone. She had been left to the care of a nanny. She had no one and when she did get someone he turned out to be a piece of trash. 'How could life be so unfair to people?' The question resonated inside her head.


Minutes went by and with each one the sobs calmed down. Even though her breaths were evening out and her sobs and sniffles were gone, Aelwyne still held onto Addison. Addison did not care at all. She would keep her in her arms forever if she could. But they were doctors and not just doctors they were surgeons and forever was not something that accompanied them. Surgeons got moments and it seemed this one was close to its end.

Their pagers went off simultaneously and they both groaned at the sound causing them to smile at each other. Addison was beyond happy to see that smile after Aelwyne had broken down.

"Addison." Aelwyne said softly. "Could you… please don't tell anyone."

"This is not my story to tell. You tell whoever you want whenever you are ready." Addison assured her.

"Now you know just how br-" Aelwyne began but Addison interrupted her placing two fingers on her lips.

"We are all broken, that's how the light comes in. Haven't you heard?" Addison said with a smile. "Now let's go. We have pages to answer."

Aelwyne returned her smile once more and she handed her her white coat which lay discarded in a corner of the room with her stethoscope. The intern put on the white coat and used some more tissues to clear her face some more.

"Ready? I kinda need you to navigate out of here." Addison said with a chuckle.

"Yes. I'll be your guide." Aelwyne responded with a chuckle of her own, which to Addison was the best win ever. "And Addison… thank you."


They had been paged to the E.R. for a consult. There was some sort of commotion a few beds over with Meredith's patient. Addison had Aelwyne go and see if she could help. Aelwyne made her way over to the patient who was on restraints.

"Meredith what do you need?" Aelwyne called.

"Some lorazepam so I can take a look at the wound and begin suturing." Meredith called out as she tried to adjust the restraints.

Aelwyne came back with the medicine and handed it to Meredith. Taylor, the nurse, was now putting restraints on the patient's legs to keep him from kicking and to try and immobilize the leg which had a deep gash. Blood was oozing out of the wound faster now so Aelwyne went to apply pressure. As she applied pressure the patient kicked out once more and connected with her healing ribs sending a shot of pain to her side. Aelwyne yelped but maintained pressure.

"Aelwyne! Are you ok?" Meredith asked her voice full of concern. "Aelwyne!"

"Fine." Aelwyne hissed. "I'm fine."

The patient began to calm down as Meredith had administered the medication. They switched places and Aelwyne backed up a few steps before clutching to her side.

"Ael…" Meredith began.

"It's ok. Take care of him. I'll be out in the hall." After that she made her way to the hallway and leaned against the wall. The pain was more of a soreness pain than the jabbing one she had had when the ribs had been bruised.

"Aelwyne." She turned to find Cristina looking at her with sad eyes.

"Hey." She said breathing a little hard.

"I'm so sorry. I really didn't mean to push so much today. I'm really sorry and I-" whatever else Cristina was going to say was lost as Aelwyne wrapped her free arm around her pulling her into a side hug.

"I know." Aelwyne whispered. Her breathing was still a bit labored.

"Are you ok?" Cristina asked, backing away and noticing her hand holding onto her side.

"Cristina! Get Dr. Torres to take a look at her. My patient kicked her. I got surgery." Meredith called as she wheeled her patient to the elevator.

"Where did he hit you?" Cristina asked, turning to face her once more.

"Just my side. But I'm ok." Aelwyne responded with a smile.

"I don't care. Wait in there." Cristina practically shoved her into an empty exam room.


"What did I tell you?" Callie came in a few minutes after.

"It's not my fault. Besides it's not hurting too much right now." Aelwyne tried to defend herself.

"Whatever let me see." Callie said lifting her scrub top.

"How's that feel? And that?" Callie asked as she palpated the area.

"It's fine. I swear it's ok." Aelwyne tried.

The door flew open and Bailey walked in with a frown on her face. Sending shivers down Aelwyne's spine. Then the door at the far end opened and Alex walked in.

"Oh I'm sorry. I thought it was empty." His eyes falling on the healing bruises on her skin. "I hope he suffers a very painful death… sorry to interrupt."

Callie covered her skin once more bringing the scrub down. Aelwyne looked at him and gave him a small smile, which he returned. She knew her friends already knew the details of what had happened that night. However they never spoke of it trying to spare her the awful memories, which she greatly appreciated.

"No one else is going to hurt you sweetness." He said and then was gone.

Addison walked in next followed by Cristina, a mixture of fear and anger in her eyes. Aelwyne shifted uncomfortably in the room. She felt like she was in the principal's office about to be chewed up for doing things she was not supposed to be doing.

"Is she ok?" Addison asked tearing her gaze away from her and turning to Callie, her voice stern.

"She's fine. She'll probably be sore for a bit but she's ok." Callie said standing up.

"You are on scut for the rest of the week. End of discussion." Bailey said, she was fuming.

"But." Aelwyne tried.

"But nothing. End. Of. Discussion." Her resident accentuated each word.

"Bailey, she can still go to surgeries and such just like I said this morning. No heavy lifting and no long surgeries." Callie tried to help her as she had turned to her with pleading eyes.

"I said-" Bailey started.

"Dr. Bailey I want to keep her in my service. I have plenty of scut for her. So she'll be coming with me." Addison said with her I-am-an-Attending-I-give-the-orders voice.

The commanding tone must have clicked with Bailey because she nodded and walked out. Cristina shot her a 'oh you're in trouble' look and followed the resident. Then Callie excused herself leaving Aelwyne alone with Addison.

Addison was quiet for a while just looking at her and she maintained the eye contact though she was scared for her life. The attending took a step forward and Aelwyne felt herself shrink a bit as she did. She thought of apologizing but thought better of it and stayed quiet.

"You're an idiot." The attending said before closing the distance and pulling her into a hug.

"Sorry." Was all she could manage to say.

"Fine." Addison said, pulling back from her. "Let's go, we have a C-section." And with that she began to walk out.

"But Dr. Bailey said scut only." Aelwyne said as she walked next to her.

"But I'm Dr. Montgomery and I get to decide who I want in my O.R." Addison said with a smirk. "But you better keep your mouth shut about it. I don't want Miranda to know."

"Your secret's safe with me." Aelwyne giggled.


They scrubbed and took command of O.R. 3. Aelwyne went to her designated spot and waited expectantly for Addison but the redhead just stood slightly behind her. Aelwyne turned to face her confusion in her eyes.

"I think I've heard Bailey say… 'see one, do one, teach one'. Have you heard that before?" The attending said with a twinkle in her eyes.

"Wait… you want me… like me… am I doing this?" Aelwyne said excitedly.

"Yes but calm down. I need you centered, Dr. Neirhem." Addison said seriously and much like it had before she saw the shift in Aelwyne's eyes. "Good. Now go to the other side."

Aelwyne moved to stand opposite to Addison on the patient's right side. She took a few more breaths as she recalled every step she would need to take. She closed her eyes and focused. A few more breaths and she was ready.

"Scalpel." Her voice came out clear and direct. The nurse heeded her request placing the instrument neatly on her open palm.

"Good. Now the incision needs to be about 4 to 6 inches. You want to use just enough force to cut through the skin. Good. Now cut through the fat." As Addison spoke Aelwyne followed her directions. "Now everything will move quickly. Ready?" She continued and the intern nodded.

"Retractors." Aelwyne said as she finished the incision. The nurse and Addison each held one. "Scalpel."

"Now the uterus. Careful with how deep you cut. Good." Addison instructed as the intern made quick work of the incision. "Now I'll push down as you reach in carefully and pull the baby out. That's it. Good."

Aelwyne pulled the baby out, untangling the umbilical cord which was wrapped around its neck, and after a few long seconds it started to wail. She released a breath she didn't know she was holding and handed the baby to the nurse so she could clip the umbilical cord.

The rest of the procedure went flawlessly. The baby and mother were taken away and they were left scrubbing out. Aelwyne was quiet, her head filled with so many thoughts, so many questions. She kept going over each step in her head. She had just done a surgery. She had just been lead surgeon. She was worried and ecstatic at the same time. She felt like she was flying so, so high.

"How does it feel?" Addison asked with a smile. Aelwyne said nothing, she just looked at her and beamed. "Yeah. I know. Now let's go inform the father of the amazing job you just did."

"Ok." Aelwyne responded happily.

When they stepped out of the scrub run they found Bailey and all of her interns standing in the hallway looking at them.

"Busted." Aelwyne whispered, shrinking next to Addison.

"You are supposed to be on scut. Not doing surgery." Bailey said bitterly.

"Yo Sweetness over there did her first surgery." Alex said with a smile.

"Lucky." Cristina protested.

"I know." Meredith said with a fake pout.

"Cool." George said with a thumbs up and Izzie slightly smiled next to him.

"Dr. Bailey, Dr. Torres cleared her for surgery so I had her come into surgery with me." Addison said trying her best not to sound scared.

"Not just come in. You had her perform the surgery." Bailey countered.

"See one. Do one. Teach one. Right?" Addison said with a smile.

"Correct." Richard said as he approached the group. "You did good Dr. Neirhem." He added throwing the intern a smile.

"Thank you sir." She said softly avoiding Bailey's gaze.

"Aelwyne." Everyone turned to face him as he took a more serious tone. "We got a call from the DAs office. They want you to testify either later today or tomorrow morning. They said it was up to you."

And then there were 16. I hope y'all enjoyed it. I'm a little sick, which has landed me in the hospital, so I wasn't able to go through it as I usually do to ensure no mistakes. Anyway leave some comments and let me know what you're thinking. ;)