Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
~0~
~~Edward~~
Her kisses were driving me crazy. I felt the ache in my groin intensify but I didn't stop her.
"Edward," she whispered. "Can you…take off your T-shirt?"
My heart pounded. I wanted to do whatever she said, but I was also wary of where I knew this would lead. I knew unprotected intercourse was out of the question, but when I thought of her taste, and helping her cum, I knew I couldn't pass up the opportunity. So, with eyes closed and a sigh, I found myself yanking my T-shirt over my head.
Wordlessly, Bella pushed lightly against my chest until I was lying back on the sofa. I closed my eyes. The anticipation of feeling her lips on me was even more exciting, not knowing where or when she would kiss me.
She didn't wait; her lips resumed kissing my throat. I felt her body weight on me, where I needed contact the most. Slowly, so slowly, her kisses moved in a jagged line across my neck. I felt the long strands of her ponytailed hair float over my skin as she lowered her head. Her lips were moist and soft; her breath was warm, rapid. Bella continued kissing me, across my collarbone, and back down the middle of my chest. I pulled her warm body against me more forcefully. She was hot and I couldn't help but moan when I felt her mouth cover my nipple, as she slowly kissed and then licked.
I opened my eyes, and watched as her lips moved to my other nipple. The sight of her pink tongue, touching delicately in a circle and then her lips closing over as she lightly sucked, had me trembling.
This was one of my ultimate fantasies. It's like Bella knew exactly what to do to make me damn hot, and all she was doing, technically, was kissing me. She stopped and looked at my face as she breathed heavily.
Fuck!
The weight of her body on me, unmoving, was the sweetest torture, so I thrust up to her. She suddenly lifted herself off me.
"I want to take it more slowly," she said.
I focussed my eyes to see her remove her own T-shirt. The sight had me in a deranged panic.
"Bella," I said, my tone a mixture of chastisement and excitement. If she thought removing her clothing was taking it slowly, I was going to die of heart failure.
Bella was still wearing her shorts and a platinum colored lace bra.
I watched in awe, desperate for her. Just take off her bra, take off her shorts, kiss and lick her breasts, thrust into her as she rides me.
My hands–that had been resting lightly on her waist–were now itching to touch all of her. Fuck, she's so gloriously sensual. We can't risk doing much more than this.
Who was I kidding? If she wanted me to take her, if she asked me to, I knew I would, damn the consequences.
My father's clinical voice shot through my brain. 'Edward, you need to act responsibly when it comes to sex. You must always wear a condom.'
Damn it. I don't want to be hearing my dad, not now!
"You said we couldn't go all the way," Bella's words made me ache. "Can we…second base?"
I watched, mesmerized as she removed her bra.
I grabbed her, touched her, moaning and kissing, licking and fondling her creamy white breasts. They were perfect; soft, warm and delicious.
Nothing, nothing at all could compare to this; to the feel of her and my desire to have her. Ask me Bella, just ask me and I will. I'll take you. I want you.
Bella let me kiss her breasts then I felt her push me to recline back on the sofa. Her lips and body lowered on top of me. We kissed and kissed, and when she pulled away to breathe, I licked her neck, my hands at the side of her breasts stroking and fondling.
It was bliss.
It was torture.
I wanted her. What's the worst that can happen?
She'd have my baby. She'd be connected to me, forever. It's gonna happen anyway, one day.
No! Not now, not before I've had her all to myself. I need her, all to myself.
"Bella," I held her face in my hands and stared at her.
I tried to say the words, tell her we should stop, slow down, but how? I wanted her, she wanted me, but it was too risky to continue. I knew if I didn't find the will to stop now, I would descend into a lustful blur and it would be inevitable. I wouldn't be able to stop myself from going all the way.
Suddenly my dream flashed back to me.
I'm the fucking mountain lion, salivating to taste her, to claim her. I have to take control of this!
"Bella, I think we need to," I closed my eyes before I said the words, fearful that she'd see right through me, "just hold each other." I took in a deep breath.
I felt her body slump against me, her arms holding me tightly.
Just feeling her body under my fingertips and knowing that she was it for me, calmed me immensely. We have the rest of our lives to be together.
I could smell her skin, her hair and I could feel the soft breeze of her breath over my chest.
After I willed my body to calm, I kissed her forehead.
We lay together without speaking. I couldn't believe how much emotion I felt, just holding her. Everything Alice had said was true. Being with your soul mate is everything. I knew I'd do anything for Bella, be anything I could be. I knew our lives would be passionately happy, always supporting each other equally, learning and living together, every single day.
I remembered what Alice had said to me when I was sixteen:
'Edward, I dreamt of your soul mate! She's beautiful; she's kind and self-sacrificing. She will love you more than you will ever know. She will be searching for you; you are destined to be together. I think it's soon, Edward, I feel you will meet her very soon.'
The only part of Alice's premonition that didn't happen was the year. I knew that I would have met Bella at age sixteen, if she'd actually gone to live with Chief Swan in Forks.
I tried to imagine what it would have been like meeting her then. I'd had a great school life. I played baseball, spent a lot of my spare time composing and playing the piano. I was an A student. I would have been attracted to Bella instantly. I couldn't help but wonder what both our lives would have been like if we'd met seven years ago. But I also remembered that I kind of resented Alice's 'gift' back then. Would I have deliberately treated Bella with indifference, in a childish protest against Alice's premonition?
Fuck! Seven years. I could have been with Bella seven years ago.
I remembered she'd told me about not going to Forks because she had a tough time or something. Suddenly, I wanted the full story.
"Bella, can I ask you something?"
She breathed in and out deeply. "Yes."
"Tell me why you didn't go and live with your dad when you were sixteen, exactly?"
Her fingers started running up and down my chest. It felt too good. I stilled her hand and brought it up to rest over my heart.
"I would have missed my friends and…"
"And? Please tell me." I said softly and squeezed her tighter in my arms.
"I didn't want to leave Australia. I wanted to be…it was…Riley."
My heart sank. Riley, of course, she'd told me she had a crush on him.
We kept holding each other. If Bella had left Australia, we would have been together, there was no doubt, and Riley wouldn't have had the chance to hurt her. She would have been mine and mine alone. There wouldn't have been the mistake of Lauren Mallory either. If time could be rewound…
But time can't be rewound. Alice was right. I was destined to meet her anyway. So it didn't happen when we were sixteen. We've met now and that's all that matters.
I thought back to my dream. I won't be able to protect her every minute of every day, but we'll get through anything as long as we have each other.
"Can I ask you something?" she said softly.
"Yes, anything."
"When you're working…I mean, you know, on a movie, how do you, I mean, if you're supposed to be in love, and you have to…"
I knew what she was trying to say.
"Bella, I become the character. I can use all the emotions I've felt from past experiences to act like I think the character would, in any particular scene."
"So when you're kissing…Rosalie, you just believe you're the character and remember the emotions you've felt in the same situation to make it seem realistic?"
"Yes. That's the method. I can separate my professional life from my personal life so when I'm acting a kissing scene with Rosalie, I'm feeling the emotions, as I think the character would. Even though I am kissing her, I psych myself up to think like the character, so even though it's me physically and I'm recalling emotions that I've felt previously, I can still separate myself from the act, if you know what I mean."
"Oh," she sighed.
"I don't feel that way about Rosalie, Bella. I can let my character be in love, because I've felt that emotion. I'm living in it right now. I can use it, but it doesn't mean I feel it for any of the actors that I work with." I smoothed my hands over her hair.
We lay in silence again.
The breeze blew through the curtains. The sun had shifted. I guessed it was after three o'clock. I had only twenty-four more hours of alone time with her, but I needed to separate from her tempting body. I was determined to get our casual friendship back to how it was when we'd been in the hotel.
"Maybe you can write and I can work on my other song. Unless you think that will be too distracting for you?" I suggested.
I kissed her again. I couldn't believe how sensual her lips were.
"Inspiring, not distracting," she said. I watched as she rolled over me and stood up.
~0~
~~Bella~~
Tonight, tonight.
I couldn't help but smile. I pulled back, and lifted myself over his body to get up. I was still topless; his eyes drank in my body adoringly. I blushed as I fumbled for my bra and slipped it back on, bending as I reached behind to hook it up, my less than abundant cleavage falling forward.
He noticed. I watched as Edward adjusted himself in his shorts and licked his lips.
Why does he have to be so blatantly sexy!
He closed his eyes. "You're killing me Bella. I can't even tell you…" he said softly.
I quickly put my T-shirt on. He wants me now?
I looked down at his shirtless body. "I don't need to write, right now. I mean if you want to…?"
His eyes flashed open and he shook his head, though his eyes were absorbing me, running over my body.
He sat up quickly. "No, you go and write. I promise not to…distract you too much." He stood up, kissed me chastely on the side of the mouth, grabbed his T-shirt off the floor then walked across the room to unclasp his guitar case.
I went straight into the bathroom. How can I wait until tonight? I want him now. I was so turned on from our make-out session that I needed new undies.
I snuck into my room and got changed into some fresh underwear. When I walked back into the living area, Edward was seated on the armchair, where he'd sat last night, a pencil in his mouth and a sheet of paper on the armrest, his guitar held as if ready to play.
Damn, I wish he'd stayed shirtless.
I sat at my laptop, and opened my latest chapter. I couldn't stop smiling, as I re-read, and continued writing. The soft strum coming from behind me made my heart flutter in my chest. How can this be happening to me? I was sure that after Riley I would never be able to feel this level of love or desire. I had to stop typing and poke my cheeks; they were so sore from grinning like an idiot at the way he'd held me.
I thought about his words. I thought back to the photographs of Edward and Rosalie on set, kissing. He looked so in love as he was about to kiss her. He was in character. He's not with her. I smiled again then a disturbing thought hit me. But those photos were taken a few days before I went to Forks. Was he remembering his love for Tanya when he kissed Rosalie?
Those unsettling feelings started welling up inside me again.
He said he could separate his personal life and professional life. But he also said the song wasn't the reason he wanted to take things slowly. He's stalling going further because he's waiting for the song to be signed, or maybe, no he's not being Nicholas; he's not being a character. It's me that Edward wants; he loves me.
A ringing sound startled me. I turned to see Edward, his brow furrowed, place his guitar down and move the throw cushions off the sofa to find his phone. When he saw the display he didn't look happy.
"Hey, what's up? Everything's fine…Oh…I understand…Hang on." He lowered the phone and looked across to me.
"We have to leave here tomorrow at midday to make the ferry on time. Emmett wants to know if he should book you on it as well. I'll have to travel with him, but, we'd get back to Vancouver at the same time. If that works for you?"
I hadn't even thought about leaving. All I had to do was place the keys in the little pot on the porch, where my confirmation email told me they would be. I knew Edward couldn't drive back in my rental car with me, and that made me feel anxious.
Midday? That leaves me less than twenty-four hours to be here alone with him.
"OK," I said. The anxiety I was feeling began to consume me. As Edward kept talking to Emmett I kind of switched off.
I turned back to my laptop, but now the text on the screen looked like a jumbled mess. I felt an ache in my chest.
Everything will be fine when we get back to the hotel. Everything will be OK. He'll still want me.
~0~
~~Edward~~
Bella and I made dinner together. It was fun, light-hearted and easy. In fact, it was too easy being with her. So many times I'd unconsciously reach for her, or found myself staring at her lips, wanting to taste them when she licked the wooden spoon.
So, to distract myself from any inappropriate behavior, I questioned everything she told me to do in the kitchen. She took the bait, laughing and joking with me, so casual and funny. This was the girl who had taken me to Laurent's, she was here again and more alluring than ever.
I was more than excited that we were making lasagne, my favorite.
We sat opposite each other when we ate. We drank the last of the wine. Everything was casual and I'd been elated that we'd finally gotten back to that easy friendship that we'd established at the hotel. Bella asked me about each song on the playlist, about why I'd chosen them and what they meant to me.
I washed the dishes as she dried them and put them away.
The music stopped.
It wasn't late, but suddenly it felt like last night. Awkwardness swallowed up the easy banter once the music was no longer playing.
"I suppose we should get ready for bed?" she said, biting her bottom lip nervously.
As soon as I comprehended that I would be lying in bed with her, I was instantly hard.
Fuck!
I'll just hold her and sleep, no big deal.
"Sure, I'll see you in there then." I turned away and proceeded to pack my guitar in its case.
I'll keep my dick in my pants. I can make love to her back at the hotel after I get some condoms.
I heard the bathroom door close. I sat heavily on the sofa. I should have just asked Emmett for some.
Fucking hell, how am I going to get through until morning?
Fuck it, I haven't had intercourse in two years, I can wait another night.
This is going to be the ultimate test of strength.
I waited until I heard Bella come out of the bathroom and I took a pair of clean boxers into the bathroom with me, chanting to myself to stay calm, which wasn't really working.
I brushed my teeth, three times. I found her perfume bottle, memorising the name, inhaling it, stupidly. The smell made me rock hard within an instant. I thought about having a shower and jerking off, but I couldn't, not while she was just across the hall.
Man the fuck up! Stop thinking with your dick.
I opened the bathroom door and walked with purpose into the bedroom. Bella had left the lamp on. I scurried to get as quickly as possible under the cool sheets. I switched off the lamp. It didn't really make much difference, Bella hadn't lowered the blinds and moonlight lit up the whole room, just like last night.
I pulled her against me and kissed her forehead.
"Goodnight Bella," I said, hoping to God she didn't accidently brush any part of her warm body near my aching dick.
She snuggled into me, her hand curled around my waist.
"Aren't you going to give me a proper kiss goodnight?"
Jesus fuck!
I felt her shift up to me, and her lips found mine. She kissed me softly then opened her mouth. Her tongue; her taste. I kissed her back. Then I stopped.
"Goodnight," I said.
She didn't say anything for a minute and I could feel my body tense.
"Goodnight, Edward."
As soon as the words left her lips I felt my body relax enough to sense the soft mattress underneath my back. I was so relieved that she seemed to want to sleep as well that I pulled her closer and closed my eyes.
Bella shifted her body until I could feel her lips at my neck. Her breath was a soft caress over my skin. Then I felt it, the lightest of kisses, over my neck and under my ear.
"Bella, we need to sleep." I said, rather unconvincingly.
"I want you to make love to me." She whispered.
I froze. My body ached all over, ached for her.
"We can't, Bella."
Then I felt her hand run down my stomach. I grabbed it, before it reached my straining dick.
"Please, let's just sleep." My voice came out all wrong. I sounded frustrated.
"You don't…want me?"
I thought my heart would split open in my chest, she sounded so hurt.
"What? Of course I want you," I said quickly, my hand cradled her face. "How could you think that I don't?"
"Then what are we waiting for? I need you Edward, please, make love to me." She rolled on top of me, pressing her body fully against me. Her hands went to my hair and she kissed me, hungrily, passionately and desperately. Feeling her warm body on me was about to completely undo all the feigned control.
"Bella, I don't have any condoms," I said as soon as I was able to pull her away from my lips. "You said you're not taking precautions…we can't…I want to, but we just can't…"
She looked at me with confusion. I saw her face fall.
"You didn't bring any with you?"
"No, God, I didn't plan to…well, I didn't think. I just left the hotel with one thought and that was to get to you before you saw those pap pics."
"Last night…I thought…"
"I wasn't thinking practically last night. I was just so relieved that I finally told you how I felt, that you let me tell you that I love you, Bella."
I kissed her, overcome with emotion. I knew I was an idiot. Of course she wouldn't have known I didn't have any protection with me! No wonder she thought I didn't want to be with her.
"I'm sorry," I said in between kisses. "When we get back to the hotel, I promise you, there's nothing I want more than to make love to you."
I kissed her; her body weight on me was once again, a sweet torture.
Then Bella's lips and body started moving down, slowly kissing my chest and then nipples, driving me insane with lust. It wasn't until her lips reached my navel that I realised what she was doing.
God yes, yes!
I was visualizing Bella's lips and how plump and full and erotic they were, and how they always aroused me when she did something as simple as take a sip from her wine glass. I'd lost count of how many times I'd imagined her lips on my dick as I got myself off, alone.
Her nose skimmed along the waistband of my boxers. She was straddling my knees now.
Don't look, do not fucking look.
When her hand lightly ran over the outline of my throbbing dick I could feel myself tense. Her fingers curled against my skin, she pulled, lifted and dragged down the waistband.
I should stop her.
This is third base, third base!
"Tell me to stop, if you….don't want me to…" she whispered.
Oh Jesus, Bella. Don't stop, don't stop!
I couldn't speak. I couldn't look. It was taking all my restraint, all my control not to pull her to me. Instead, I lay as stiff and unmoving as a corpse, too afraid and expectant to do anything else.
Breath. Hot
Fingers. Cool.
Tongue. Wet.
Tasting.
Consuming.
Fuck!
I opened my eyes.
The sight of Bella with me in her mouth as she lazily glided up and down, her small hand wrapped firmly around the base of my dick, squeezing, pulling, tugging; I had fucking died and gone to heaven.
Then another sensation in addition to the wet heat of her mouth that surrounded me; Bella's other hand cupped me, slowly rolling me over her fingers.
I moaned and chanted incoherently.
"Bell-argh. Bell-ahhhh!"
She opened her eyes. She looked up at me through her lashes, and I was gone. Even though I'd already climaxed twice that day, nothing could have stopped me when she had me in her mouth.
"I'm gonna…" I warned and watched as she lost suction for a split second. She smiled at my words; the look of pride on her face was unmistakable.
She sunk down and pulled me deeper into her mouth just as I couldn't hold it anymore.
I cried out with my release, the sound echoing around us.
Bella's lips stayed on me as she swallowed down all that I had.
~0~
~~Bella~~
It was like an out of body experience. One minute he was telling me he didn't have any condoms and then I was taking him out of his boxers and pulling him into my mouth.
So hard, yet silken soft and slick and filling; big and long.
When he indicted he would come, I felt so elated, so happy and anxious to taste him.
He swelled and twitched and his hips jerked off the bed as I pulled him in as deep as I could without gagging.
"BELLAHHHHH!" he shouted. I felt the warm pulse of his ejaculate glide down my throat as I swallowed, and I kept my lips around him until he had nothing left.
I opened my eyes to see Edward, spent, his chest rising and falling with each rapid breath. He was beautiful and his face so relaxed, he looked so young. He looked like the photograph Eric had shown me from his yearbook; Edward at sixteen, relaxed, alive and without a care in the world. I tried to absorb the look; I wanted it in my memories forever.
Slowly, I extracted him from my mouth, wiping saliva off my lips and chin with the back of my hand and trying to catch my breath. I tucked him back into his boxers, and slid up his body to rest my head against his chest; I could hear his heart thumping wildly, his arms surrounded me.
Even though the ache between my legs didn't dissipate, I knew all I needed was the comfort of his embrace to feel satisfied.
"I'm so in love with you," I said.
It was true and I wanted to shout it, but my voice was soft. Only for him; words only for him. No one else mattered. As long as I'm his and he's mine, I don't care.
Hide me in the hotel, love me; I will cherish you until you're ready to be with me publicly.
I knew there wasn't really a choice in the matter for me, but I owned it. I just want Edward. If it has to be a secret, so be it.
We lay in silence. I would have assumed Edward was asleep except for the constant soothing stokes of his fingers through my ponytail. I wasn't going to break the moment. I had no idea what was going on his mind then I wanted to know.
I used the words he had spoken to me in the lake. "Tell me what you're thinking," I whispered.
He didn't speak straight away and when he did, he sounded as though his mind was far away.
"You don't know how many times I've imagined you doing that to me," he said softly.
"Really?" I asked. "How many times?" I asked playfully.
"You've heard that men think about sex an average of thirteen times a day?" he asked.
"Um, no," I laughed. "I thought that was an old wives tale," I joked.
"It's not. Since you took me to Laurent's, that's all I…I mean, it's not all I've thought about, but it's dominated my thoughts."
"Laurent's?" I asked, confused.
I shifted my body so I could look up to his eyes. Even in moonlight they were intense, so warm and expressive.
"That was the night that I let myself admit that I was in love with you," he said, kissing me softly.
My head was reeling. That was the night I knew I was in love with him too. I felt my skin flush when I remembered the look on his face as he sang Episode and what the two older ladies had said. 'That boy is in love with you.'
If he was in love with me then, maybe he was thinking about me when he was in that scene, filming the kiss with Rosalie? I felt my love for him sweep through my body. Tears came, my heart beat so fast. Edward loves me.
"I love you," I said. The pulsing between my legs burned and I rocked into this thigh.
The playfulness was now heavy again, serious and crackling with desire.
He kissed me then suddenly he glided himself from underneath me and positioned me on my back. His hand tugged on my undies, he started yanking them down with one hand.
"Edward!" I said, anxiously. "You don't—" he cut me off with his tongue in my mouth, kissing me frantically.
Then he pulled away. He looked so dangerously sexy in the moonlight. His eyes were dark, the thick black roughness of his three days' growth a stark contrast to his pale, almost luminescent skin. He was staring at my mouth then I felt his long warm fingers over my thighs as he lowered the fabric. I easily shimmied and used my foot to push my undies all the way off.
He pushed the jersey of my tank top up, until my breasts were exposed. I reached down to lift it all the way off.
"I can't be inside you," he said in a breathy whisper, "not yet, but I can still show you my love. I can give you pleasure now, Bella. I wanna make you cum."
I couldn't help but moan. His words sent a shiver through my body.
When he lowered his hand, it was embarrassing to know that he could feel how aroused I was.
"Your desire for me is beautiful," he said softly. "Please don't ever be ashamed of it."
It wasn't the first time I'd been convinced he could read minds. I sucked in a deep breath. The anticipation of his touch made me dizzy.
We're connected somehow…like he said, destiny or something?
His lips attached to my neck as his fingers started exploring.
Swirling and pushing.
Stroking and plunging.
All the while he sucked my neck, or kissed my cheek, or jaw. He skimmed his nose along my ear, sending blissful shivers up and down my spine and over my scalp.
"Edward," I whispered. I was so close and so euphoric. He lowered his head then his lips found my breast and he nuzzled and kissed and licked. Is hand kept plunging, circling.
His head lowered as he kissed his way down my body. I knew where he was headed, but I wanted his lips on mine.
"Edward," I panted, and touched his jaw. "Please kiss me," it sounded like I was begging. He slid his body back up, his fingers never breaking contact with me.
He kissed me, his tongue, long and forceful, plunged into my mouth. He grunted.
I was so, so close. I pushed my hand down to his and when his long sensual fingers hit the right spot, I wrapped my hand around his and guided him precisely where I needed the pressure.
The sound that escaped my throat was indescribably embarrassing. The orgasm radiated low as my limbs tingled. I sucked in a lungful of air, panting it out again with a whimper. I held his fingers where I needed them, the sensation continued, going and going, in a never ending vibration of pleasure.
When the orgasm petered out, I opened my eyes. Edward was staring at me.
"You're so beautiful," he whispered.
I knew he meant it. I knew he wanted me as much as I wanted and needed him. He loves me.
Edward only removed his hand when I let go of my tight hold on it.
"I love you," we said in unison.
~0~
A/N: As always, I love to read your thoughts and I know I've been slack with review replies, but I'll try harder this time. Thank you for reading. Luv BBxx
