A/N: A swift update while I have the chance ... Thanks for sticking with this through the darkness - we're not out of it yet, but I promise there is light ahead. And more twists and turns. And probably more darkness. But also light lol. Do feel free to share your thoughts, it's always great to hear from you. T x


Thirty-One

Although they were both worried about the shell-shocked prospect, both Chibs and Eden felt they needed to give Charlie some time alone with his mom to try to come to terms with what had happened and say his goodbyes in private. That left them sat in uncomfortable silence at opposite ends of the small couch in one of the ICU relatives' rooms, each of them lost in their own head.

As much as Charlie was their priority now, the loss of a loved one would always stir up difficult memories for them both – Eden having been devastated to have lost her dad as a child and still finding herself haunted from time to time by thoughts of the family torn apart by the crash that would end up doing so much to shatter her own life too, and Chibs painfully reminded of the young woman who had been ripped from him while carrying a child they'd known nothing about and the long years he had spent in exile away from his wife and daughter.

"I'm glad you're here, sweetheart," Chibs said finally, not looking up from where he was sat hunched over with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands, although he did reach tentatively for Eden's hand.

But she pulled away when his fingers grazed hers. "I'm here for Charlie."

"I know," Chibs sighed, something in her choked voice making him suspect that news of April's passing wasn't all that had reached her ears. "Eden …"

"Don't," she managed, in an order that would have sounded sharper if it hadn't been so much like a plea. "I can't do this here."

The biker raked a hand through his hair and nodded in understanding. It wasn't the time or the place, he knew that. But he also knew how much she was hurting and not just for Charlie. He hated that he was the cause of that. He wanted to at least try to explain, to—

"Lisa though, seriously?" Eden blurted out, rounding on him despite her own reluctance, her green eyes bright with tears and hurt and disbelief. "All the women at your disposal and you have to sleep with the one who works for my brother – the one I have to see all the time, the one I thought was my friend!"

He had to force himself not to look away guiltily. Whether they were together or not, he knew it had been a dick move, albeit a largely unintentional one. She deserved better than excuses. She deserved better than him running from his mistakes. He met her gaze with nothing but sincere regret etched all over his scarred face.

"I'm sorry, darlin', truly," he said roughly. "I ain't gonna fill your head wi' bullshit, but I need you to know I never meant to hurt you. I know it ain't an excuse, but I was so fucking drunk. This whole horrific mess wi' April … I weren't thinking straight. Or at all. It was nothing. She could have been anyone. Except you. She could never be you and that was all I wanted. Just you."

Eden shook her head tearfully, torn between wanting to believe him and wanting to slap him for saying that when he was the one who had pushed her away in the first place.

"You don't get to say that when you were the one who ended it," she said, swiping at the tears staining her cheeks as she got up to pace the room in her distress. "Saying you wanted me, it's like it's somehow my fault for not being there! Maybe you just want what you can't have – because you did have me, Filip, so what happened? Was I not good enough? Did you just get bored?"

Chibs jumped to his feet at that, his jaw tense as he grabbed her by the arms, refusing to let her pull away from him when she tried. "You know that ain't it," he growled. "I know I fucked up and that's on me, but don't turn this into something it ain't. I love you, Eden."

"You've got a fucking funny way of showing it!" she bit out, wrenching out of his grasp and heading for the door. "I need some air."


"You doing okay, sweetheart?"

Trying to focus on the paperwork piling on her desk in the Sam's Yard office, despite the tears blurring her vision, Lyla tried to nod. "Mm-hmm, fine."

"Hate to break it to you, doll, but for an actress, that needed work," Tig said, pushing away from the doorframe he'd been leaning against and coming into the office.

"I just thought if I could at least get ahead of things here – I mean, we're going to be busy with organising the funeral and sorting out April's house and …"

Hushing her mid-flow, Tig simply pulled her out of her seat and into his arms for a hug, petting her hair softly as she finally turned her face into his chest and gave into the tears that had been threatening.

"I can't stop thinking about poor Charlie," Lyla wept. "And April, oh my god, she must have been so scared. Why does this keep happening to our family, Tig? Why do we keep losing people like this?"

Amid a fresh wave of long-standing remorse for his own deadly actions against that very family and guilt that it should be Opie's widow of all people in his arms asking that question, the VP didn't trust himself to speak and instead just held her tighter, pressing a little kiss to the top of her head.

"Is Chibs still at the hospital with Charlie?"

"Yeah," Tig managed. "They'll probably head back here soon."

"They'll be exhausted," Lyla said, pulling back to wipe her eyes and take a deep breath. It was easier to keep going if she had someone else to focus on, something practical to do. "Are you all right to finish up here if I go and check their rooms are clean? Eden might be able to get hold of something to help Charlie sleep if the hospital doesn't think to give him something …"

"You go," he nodded. "Get some of the girls to help if anything needs done though. You do too much for us already, baby. And Vee's gonna come round with some food later, so don't worry about that."

Kissing his cheek with a weak smile, Lyla headed across the yard and into the main clubhouse, finding it quieter than usual, despite a few familiar faces milling around. News of April's brutal death had clearly hit hard, especially among those who had been around long enough to remember her being much closer to the heart of the club family. She went to check Charlie's room first, determined to do everything she could to make sure the young man was at least comfortable when he returned.

Her nose crinkled at the pile of laundry on the floor and crumpled sheets on the unmade bed, sweeping everything into the basket like she might for her own kids and making a mental note to ask someone to collect it. Tidying a few other bits and pieces, the photos pinned to the wall by the window caught her attention and her eyes welled up again at one in particular of Charlie and his mom, their arms wrapped around each other and both of them beaming for the camera. It had been just the two of them for so long and now …

Sniffing back tears, Lyla let her fingers trace over the photo gently before forcing herself to keep busy, heading to check on Chibs' room. It wasn't anywhere near as messy as Charlie's, but she thought he might appreciate fresh sheets after a long night and she made a mental note to have his added to the laundry pile while again setting about straightening out the room. She frowned at the sight of the nearly empty whiskey bottle on the nightstand and moved to grab it, only to stop in her tracks at the sight of the crumpled foil packet beside it.

An empty condom wrapper.

Fuck.

She headed back out to the bar with the remains of the whiskey, considering for a moment before dumping it into a glass and taking a long swig.

"Bit early for you, ain't it, babe?"

Turning to see Knox looking at her bemused, Lyla just banged the empty glass down on the counter. "Did Chibs stay here last night?"

"Uh, who's asking?" the visiting sergeant asked, sensing trouble.

"Don't do that," Lyla glared at him. "Don't cover for him."

"He was here," Knox conceded. "Went with Charlie when the sheriff arrived, came back for a bit when the hospital sent him home. What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing," Lyla said, now tinged with more than a little anger and frustration. "Just the usual – you lot always thinking with your goddamn dicks!"

"Whoa, bit harsh, sweetheart," the biker tried, wide-eyed. "Don't go tarring us all with the same brush. Is this about that blonde chick trying to sneak outta Chibs' room this morning? He is turning into a greedy bastard in his old age …"

"Who was she?" Lyla immediately demanded, now wishing she had asked her mom to have the kids so she could have stuck around and maybe talked some sense into the club's president. "One of the usual bitches?"

"Pretty sure it was that broad Koz used to bang sometimes, although she looked a bit worse for wear …"

Lyla, her own experiences with Ima and betrayal now rearing their ugly head along with everything else, closed her eyes in despair. "Lisa. Oh, Chibs, you fucking idiot."


Listening with one ear to the sheriff's account of what they knew so far, more of Chibs' attention was actually focused on watching over his young charge through a crack in the blinds over the window between April's room and the hallway. Eden had gone to join Charlie, sitting beside him at his mother's bedside, his hand clutched tightly in hers and her head resting lightly on his shoulder.

"You think we need to look into contacting Kyle Hobart?" Collins asked, finally cutting through the biker's thoughts and making him shake his head.

"Huh? Oh, Kyle … Nah. He's a piece o' work, but he ain't involved in this," Chibs said.

"He should be told though surely?"

"Why? Him and April divorced years ago."

"He's still Charlie's father …"

"Charlie's twenty-one and he don't need that feckless arsehole in his life. He weren't there for the kid when he needed him, why should now be any different?"

"Way I hear it, that wasn't entirely exactly through choice," Collins shrugged coolly.

It hit a nerve, taking a second for Chibs to recover himself enough to jab a finger in the sheriff's face. "Maybe he should have thought o' that before he did what he did," he snapped. "Don't stick your nose in what you don't understand or what don't concern you."

"That young man's welfare concerns me. Finding out who killed his mother concerns me."

"You think it don't concern me too?"

"Maybe that's what I'm afraid of. Where Samcro's concern might lead."

"How about you just focus on doing your job then?" Chibs suggested, a dark look on his face. "That way, we won't have to … express our concerns. And leave Charlie to me. His ma asked me to look after him – I ain't gonna let her down twice."


"How can I leave her here? She doesn't belong here – I want to take her h-home …"

Trying to coax Charlie into finally leaving the hospital was nothing short of heart-breaking, the realisation that he would never see his mom again finally hitting him with enough force to almost rob him of breath.

"I know, sweetie, I know," Eden whispered, unable to hide her own tears in the face of his grief as she pleaded with him. "I know it's hard, the hardest thing you'll ever have to do, but you can't stay here. I'm worried about you, Charlie. Please, let us look after you."

"Aye, come on, son," Chibs added, sympathy in his brown eyes and in the hand on the young man's shoulder. "We need to get you home …"

But his well-intentioned words only sparked fresh panic in his prospect, his head jerking up. "Home … I don't have a home anymore. I can't go back there – I can't go where she … Where they … Where will I go?"

"Oi, easy now, ya wee daftie," Chibs tried, pulling him into a warm hug to try to sooth him. "You'll come back wi' me where you belong, o' course. I told you, Charlie-Boy, we're family. I love you, kid. Now, Eden's going to drive you and I'll be right behind, okay? There's a good lad. Kiss your ma …"

Eden dashed away more tears as they watched Charlie press a soft kiss with trembling lips to his mother's pale forehead, agony on his crumpled face as he had to turn away from her.

"I love you, mom. Sleep tight."

His heartfelt little whisper made Eden press a shaky hand to her mouth to keep from sobbing and, despite the earlier tension between them, Chibs couldn't help reaching out to lay a gentle hand on her arm.

"Hey, you good to drive, pet?" he murmured, in obvious concern. "I can leave the bike here, take your car …"

But she shook her head, taking a deep breath and trying to pull herself together. "I'm good," she insisted, but at least there was no animosity in her soft tone. "Come on, Charlie, honey – this way."

Left alone in the stillness of the room, his former brother's old lady a terrible reminder of the violent chaos that existed in their world, Chibs' shoulders sagged and his hand shook as he wiped it over his face, crossing himself and then kissing his fingers before touching them lightly to her cold cheek.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you, April," he murmured. "I promise you, I'll look after your boy. And I'll make the fuckers who did this pay. On my life, darlin', I promise."