Ransa no Moribito

Guardian of the Spear-wielders


Rated: T to M

Genre: Family, Friendship, General

Main Characters: Balsa Yonsa, Tanda, Chagum, OFC, Torogai


Complete Summary

GrandMa says I'm an 'oops' baby, 'an accident'.

I wasn't expected, but both of my parents love me and I'm happy. And now, there's that boy with us, five-years-older than me; his name's Chagum… Is it normal that I'm scared to lose my place in this family? What if... Mom likes Chagum better than me? I have to show my parents that I'm better than him. I have to make sure he doesn't replace me.


Update 2022 - Note:

When I discovered Seirei no Moribito for the first time, back in 2012, I remember having searched some fanfics about a "possible child" for Tanda and Balsa. When I saw no one dared to write it – with a complete fanfic, with chapters and prequel/sequel – I decided to take the duty of, and do it.

This is how my Alika's born.

She has a lot of Alter Ego – at least ten – keeping the same name, but in different context. But, the main one belongs to my "no Moribito" saga. My main series begin Ransa no Moribito (1), followed by Kurasa no Moribito (2), Kazoku no Moribito (3) to conclude with Tamashi no Moribito (4).

This version is the translation (from the original French version) and the third try – and third version – of Ransa no Moribito, written first in 2012. As my English evolved, improved and matured over time – with the tips and advices given to me by my beta-readers – here the result. For now, it's an unbeta-read version (because I'm impatient and my beta-readers are busy, too – and I need to be confident with my English) but when the time's right, the fixed version will eventually come.

The prologue and the two first chapters are two prequels following the original plot of the anime (and somehow inspired by Nahoko Uehashi's first novel). There's also a "twin" One-Shot related to Ransa no Moribito, titled Crossroad, if you're curious; it's the prequel of Ransa no Moribito.


* The prologue and the two first chapters are written at the singular third person (she/he), while the rest of the fanfic, from the third chapter until the epilogue will be written at the singular first person (I). The main purpose of this use is to make easy the integration of my OC (original character) to the main plot of the anime and the "Moribito" books; so that readers might feel more familiar with.

Okay, okay, I stopped with my specification. If you've got some time, don't hesitate and leave a reviews. You'll make my day; and I'll make yours :3 Have a good read!


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Prologue

A Life Choice

It had been two years since Jiguro had died of illness. Balsa, now twenty-three year old, stepped in a meadow through the mountain. It was afternoon and the forest had started slowly to change its color for the fall season. Balsa was glad for having switched her dress for her red kimono. By seeing the hut, her chest tightened. Normally, she wouldn't have had that fear, but it'd been three months now since she left Tanda. She chose to jump in a new adventure and she didn't expect it to take an end so quickly. She knocked to the wooden door and opened it.

"I'm back—" She was about to says, before cutting herself.

The hut was empty; Tanda was probably out into the mountains, picking herbs and humming carelessly to himself. Balsa felt suddenly a bit nervous. She'd hoped to be able to talk with him, but she had to be patient. Once inside, after closing the door of a small cabinet, she sat down on the floor and chose to do something to change her mind; polishing her spear. Her spear was as precious as the apple of her eye and she couldn't be separate of it. She didn't see the time flies as she was deep in her thoughts.

Tanda came back; his bag and his arms were filled with plants and flower. He was quite surprised to see Balsa in the dim light of the single room.

"Balsa?! Is that you?!" he asked.

"Hey, Tanda," she smiled softly.

"I didn't expect to see you here right away. How was your last travel?"

"Breathing new air helped to change my mind. It went great!"

They continued to exchange their news during a long time. Balsa watched Tanda preparing his wild vegetable stew and looked the bubbles bursting on the surface. He gently peeled off the thin layer of skin that had formed on top of the liquid. Maybe it was the time to tell him?

"Tanda, I..."

"Yes Balsa?"

The words died in her throat. She froze instantly and changed the topic quickly.

"... Where's Master Torogai?" she asked finally.

"Oh, she's still strolling around, here and there. I don't know when she'll be back."

"Ah..."

He looked at her, carefully, "You seem exhausted, Balsa."

"I just need to get some sleep. So, after eating, I'm going to bed."

"It's okay."

He gave her a bowl and chopsticks. Once her stomach was full to burst, Balsa wrapped herself in a shiruya – she didn't even change for the night – and fall into a non-restorative sleep. Normally, she fell asleep very quickly, but this time, she took a good hour to do. When she opened her eyes, the room was plunged into the semi-darkness and Tanda was sleeping beside her. The night was about to let it place to the morning. Balsa stood up quietly and took her spear before stepping outside of the hut for her daily workout. The sun wasn't in the sky yet, but the faint pinkish glow in the horizon showed it was dawn. Balsa came back to the hut an hour later and sat down in front of the unlit foyer. She was watching Tanda sleep and wondered how she could talk to him about her decision. When he rolled over in his shiruya and opened his sleepy eyes on her, he slowly lifted his head.

"Good morning," he smiled, yawning.

"Good morning," she replied.

"Have you been watching me sleep for a while?"

"Hmm... I don't know."

Tanda straightened up slowly, avoiding a pressure drop. He hadn't changed for the night either. Leaving the blanket on the ground, he crawled on his knees to get closer of Balsa.

"Tanda, can we talk?" Balsa suddenly asked. She was no longer able to contain the stress's pressure inside her.

"Of course... Were you nervous about it?"

"I think…"

"Don't worry, you can tell me anything. You know it, right?"

She didn't answer him.

"... How many months or weeks had passed since I left you for my last adventure?"

"Three months and a few weeks, I would say," he replied.

"Indeed, that fits with my calculation."

"Your 'calculations'?" he repeated, definitively lost.

Unable to contain herself anymore, Balsa looked deeply into Tanda's eyes. Tanda understood that she was serious; she seemed to be disturbed by something.

"Are you ready to be a father?" she asked quickly.

"Eh... what?!" he exclaimed.

It wasn't the question per se that confused him so much; it was the way she had asked it. She hadn't asked him to know his opinion or his feelings. She had asked him with the purpose of having a clear answer with only two options: by "yes" or by "no". Seeing he was silent, probably in shock, Balsa repeated her question impatiently.

"Are you ready to be a father?"

"Uh... you're not asking me if I want to be a father, but if I'm ready, is that it?" he asked more clearly.

"Yes."

"I'm ready to be a father since I'm fourteen, Balsa. So my answer is 'yes'."

Balsa fled his stare in panic.

"Balsa," Tanda began softly, reaching for her hand, but the young woman pulled it away from his. "Are you... pregnant?"

Not knowing how to react emotionally, Balsa's body betrayed her and a flood of tears rolled down on her cheeks. She didn't understand why she was crying in the first place. Unable to calm down as she was shaken by violent sobs, Tanda moved closer and began to rub her back gently. He whispered to her ears comforting words.

"Hey, Balsa... calm down, it'll be fine..."

"No… I...," she said, "I know that... you're the baby's father…"

"I never doubted for a second, don't worry. I'm ready, but the other half of the answer has to come from you. Are you ready to be a mom?"

"This is exactly what turns me upside down!" she answered. "I don't feel like a mother!..."

It was the first time ever he had seen Balsa so undecided; she was so confused. She was the one who threw herself into the danger without thinking. As soon as a decision was made in her mind, she didn't change it. Choosing to help her with the best way he could, Tanda started digging to find the "pin" that was making her so worried.

"What are you afraid of, Balsa?"

"I'm not afraid!" she said sharply, too proud as her usual habit.

"Balsa, please," he said softly. "Did you ever think about being a mom when you were younger?"

"Maybe, but I don't remember... I don't want to be a wife."

"No one mentioned marriage," Tanda laughed softly. "Right now, we're talking about this."

He pointed her belly with his finger.

"This is precisely the problem..." she whispered.

"Is the baby a problem to you?" he asked.

"... I haven't had, for a very long time, wishes for such a life; to be a mother... I'm too aware about the smell of the blood printed deeply in my flesh... I'm aware about the intense and nasty desire to fight in the depths of my heart! I don't trust my maternal instinct. My hands are more suited to holding a weapon than a child."

As to prove her point of view, Balsa raised her hands in front of her and watched them, despite her tears blurring her vision.

"I know you always wanted to have a family by our own," Balsa replied, quietly. "But... for me... I don't know. It's too early... I promised Jiguro that I would save eight lives and I only saved two. I can't set until I've fulfilled my promise..."

"I don't think there's a deadline to honor your promise, right?"

"If I have a baby, I won't have any freedom... this place's going to be like a jail..."

"Don't think like that. You're afraid, Balsa."

"But I'm a warrior! I love to fight, Tanda!" she replied.

"And you'll always be able to. I know this is part of you and I don't want you to lose your freedom. If you're unhappy, then, it's useless."

"I didn't want to follow this routine path that all women in this world follow: being born, growing up, getting married, having kids and getting old and dying... I didn't want to go through all of that!"

"What if I tell you that you won't live like that?" Tanda tried. "Yes, you're pregnant, but you'll not stay here, locked up, by doing nothing of your life. You won't be alone, everything will be fine, I promise."

"... Despite everything you can tell me, to be honest, I keep thinking about my first choice... but now, I don't know anymore! Everything's so confuse in my head right now!"

"A choice? Which choice?"

Balsa turned her back to him, unable to stand his look any longer.

"I'll confess you a thing… If I'm telling it to you, Tanda, you need to promise me that you'll not get angry," Balsa said nervously.

"I promise. Go ahead."

There was a silence. Then, Balsa inhaled and got right to the point.

"To be honest, I thought, first to… to… abort that child."

Balsa had her head down, like if she was ashamed by her confession. But she had to tell him. She could no longer hold that secret, now her final choice was made. He had the right to know the truth about this thought of her. He was the father, after all. Tanda's heart skipped a beat. And despite he promised her to not get angry, he couldn't help but feel that way… at least, a little. Balsa burst a new river of tears. The sight of her big tears reminds him that she wasn't in her normal state. Even two years after Jiguro's death, Balsa was still grieving him. When he passed away, to overcome the excruciating pain that torn her heart apart, Balsa and Tanda had sex for the very first time. Over time, it's became a force of habit. Each time that Torogai wasn't at the hut, or when Balsa came back from a travel, they were doing it. And this time, he got her pregnant. She was pregnant, exhausted, engulfed by the hormones and the baby's energy could be felt. But above all of that, Tanda knew she was a human being; a hardened warrior, yes, but a human being first. He rubbed her back.

"But you didn't," he said gently. "You're still pregnant to this very day. I'm curious about the reason that changed your mind."

Balsa stiffened, and her look seems froze.

"I had doubt. I was repeating to myself again and over again that I could have lost them before the three first months. Even when I fell down the side of the hill during a fight; they were still holding on to me…"

"A though little one," Tanda smiled. "They definitively inherit this personality trait from you, for sure."

Balsa stopped to cry, less tense.

"When I noticed nothing could remove them from my womb, I've panicked… You'll feel betrayed, but…"

"Keep going. Tell me, I want to know."

"I went to see a magic-weaver. She was also a doctor… well, just like you. She didn't look like to these awkward and scary magic-weavers like Torogai-Shi. She looked very young, maybe younger than me, and was very pretty in her pale pink kimono. She would've passed for a normal commoner outside her hut. I told her about the baby. She'd been totally respectful to me. I've been touched by her kindness. Most of the women would've been guilt tripped by their relatives, their friends, or strangers, but not her. She told me about all the steps and the risk related to taking the medicine. I might have lost a lot of blood. To prevent a deadly infection, she suggested keeping me safe in her hut until the bleeding stopped naturally. I was sure about my decision. Nothing could have changed my mind, but…"

"Something happened, right?" Tanda guessed.

"Yeah… She was about to stand up to get the medicine when she froze. I asked her if something's wrong. She told me that a spirit just entered the room."

"A spirit?" Tanda asked as Balsa nodded.

"Yes… I frowned. She told me the spirit had a message for me and asked if I was inclined to listen. I accepted."

There was a new silence in the hut.

"She told me the spirit was a man. He told me – using the magic-weaver as a messenger – that he understood my current mental state and my reasons. But if I really didn't want to keep the baby, I should, at least, tell the truth first to the father…" Balsa said.

"He's a nice spirit," Tanda smiled. "Did you manage to know his name?"

"When I tried to ask her, she told me the man didn't want me to know… but clearly, this spirit man knew about the baby and… you."

"Is it possible that… Jiguro's still watching over you as a spiritual guardian?" he asked.

Balsa shrugged, "In all case, the magic-weaver told me I could take all my time to think about my decision. Whatever what I'll choose, she'll support me. I cried about the compassion she showed to me. I was a perfect stranger woman to her, and despite all, she stayed gentle, kind and compassionate all the time."

"She's a true healer, a true doctor and a magic-weaver with a golden heart. I'm glad to see you've been able to cross path with her. Do you know her name?"

"No. I didn't ask her. I didn't thought about it, either. I was really focused about… about my decision… before leaving her hut, I asked her if the spirit man was still with me. She told me 'yes'. That's all I needed to know. Two weeks had passed since I saw the magic-weaver. Except for Jiguro's death, I think I never cried that much within two weeks… I was torn by the decision. I was about to make something in your back; you would've never known."

Balsa breathed and let the silence fill the room again.

"Damn it!" she cried, wiping her eyes. "I don't know what to think about all of this!"

"I understand," Tanda said gently. "This is a very big decision and a long term responsibility... So, I'll help you by asking you the same question, at my turn: are you ready to be a mother?"

"That's the problem!... I... I don't know if I'm ready!... A part of me wants to experience motherhood, but another part of me is pushing back... I'm lost, Tanda, I don't know what to do, now..."

"It's okay, Balsa, I understand," Tanda said. "Therefore, we can make compromises."

"Compromises? I can't do it..." she sobbed, wiping her eyes with her hands.

"You're right."

Balsa looked down.

"You can't do it... and you'll not be able to…"

Tanda straightened up and placed himself behind Balsa. Knowing that he would never hurt her, Balsa didn't push him away when she felt him hugging her from behind. He placed his head in the crook of her shoulder, and then, put a hand on her belly.

"You can't do it… if you're alone. But you're not and there are no magic formulas."

"What if I failed as a mom?"

"Is Jiguro failed as a father?"

"He didn't want me, first... at the beginning..."

She stopped suddenly when she noticed that Tanda had tricked her at her own game.

"His choice was made," Tanda said amusing.

"It's not funny, Tanda!" Balsa replied, crying again, this time with a thin smile on her lips. "You prank me up!"

"You won't fail, Balsa. I'll be there with you, and Master Torogai, too. We'll raise the child, together. We'll do it and I can promise you that this baby will be the happiest child in the world. Don't worry about the superficial details. Give yourself a chance and give our child the same... please."

"I… I will… I will try…"

Balsa took another breath and surprised herself by putting her own hands on Tanda's. She put her ego aside.

"I need you..." she managed to says, after a while.

"I'll be there with you. Everything will be fine. Are you ready to be a mother?"

"... I think... I'm—" she was about to say before sighing, "Yes. I'm ready."

Finally, maybe this child has their chance...