The Twilight Saga belongs to Stephenie Meyer, Summit Entertainment and anyone else who may legally claim ownership. No copyright infringement is intended.
Chapter 5: Injury
Charlie impatiently drummed his fingers on the counter. A nurse had gone to find out if it was okay for him to see Bella now. He noticed two hospital workers several feet down the hall from where he stood. His police training kicked in and he began listening to their gossip.
"You should see it," a female voice said in awe.
"When did they do it?" a second woman asked.
"A crew finished it a few hours ago. There were dozens of them. They stripped the whole conference room. They super-sanitized and disinfected absolutely everything. They did the whole nine yards and they did it in that short amount of time too. You could do surgery on that new floor in there. Then they brought in all sorts of new furniture and equipment. It's all brand new, right out of the packaging. And the bed." The worker gave a low whistle. "Not only has no one died in it before, but it's a lot nicer than any bed I've slept in. And if you remember, I spent a night at the Beverly Wiltshire when my cousin won the lotto. This room looks like the penthouse of a five-star hotel."
"The woman in there must be someone really famous."
"That's what's so weird, she's not. She's just someone from out in Forks. I heard her boyfriend on the phone. You must have seen him, the Greek God that won't leave her side. I think I heard someone call him Carlisle."
"The one that's a bit taller than six feet, the svelte, gorgeous blond haired guy that looks like he should be on the cover of GQ?"
"That's the one, anyway-"
Her companion cut her off. "You're wrong. He's not her boyfriend, he's her doctor."
"Like in personal physician? No way, really?"
"I'm sure. He's her doctor."
"Well, that explains why he's been given access to everywhere she's been in the hospital."
"I wonder if he's single."
"I don't care if he's married."
The women giggled.
"Ladies," an older masculine voice greeted the two women.
"How are you, sir?" the first who had spoken asked, obviously deferring to authority.
"I couldn't help but overhear your conversation. You really should get the facts straight if you are going to gossip. Our new V.I.P. Suite has been in the planning stages for over a year. The patient currently occupying it was just the first one that got here when it was finished. We aren't going to leave it unoccupied just because there isn't currently a V.I.P. admitted to the hospital."
"Oh," she replied, clearly disappointed that the rumor mill had ground to a halt.
"Your speculations are much more interesting, but then, real life isn't really as intriguing as it ought to be. If you value your jobs you..."
The nurse reappeared, and Charlie shifted his attention from the conversation down the hall to her. "Go straight down there, your daughter is in a room on the right, the fourth door. The plaque on the door says 'authorized persons only'. Dr. Cullen is expecting you."
"I told you I was expected," Charlie griped.
Bella woke to the sound of a soft knock and a door opening. "How's she doing?" She heard her father ask apprehensively.
"Dad," she said, "I'm awake."
"Aw, Bells, what'd you do to yourself?"
Bella tried to sound completely healthy and normal. "I'm fine, Dad, really."
"Sure doesn't look that way," Charlie said gruffly.
"She'll make a full recovery, Charlie," Carlisle assured him. "There's no lasting damage." He gave Charlie a bracing smile.
"Well, that's something. I think I must have you to thank for that."
"Not at all," Carlisle said with aplomb. "I was in the room, but I didn't perform her surgery. Why don't I give you two some privacy and I'll fill you in on the specifics later?"
Carlisle smiled at Bella. "I'll be right over there, just across the room."
Charlie, although clearly uncomfortable, took Bella's hand and gave it a squeeze. His voice was rough. "I got here as soon as I could. I had to wait for someone to come in that could stay long enough for me to get out here."
"I'm okay, really. You didn't have to do that. I'm being taken care of."
Charlie glanced around the immense room. "As long as the doctors are as good as the building, you must be. You sure lucked out, Bells. I hear you're the first patient to stay in this room. It really does look like a five-star hotel."
"Yeah, Dad, if your hotel is equipped with all sorts of sinks, sanitizers, and beeping machinery."
"Well, I've never seen anything like this in a hospital before. It does have some pretty high tech stuff, though, doesn't it? This place looks like a combination of luxury hotel and something out of a medical scene from a science fiction movie."
"Yeah, no super germs in here." Bella grimaced in pain.
Carlisle was instantly by her side. "Isabella, where?" he asked simply.
Charlie thought it seemed like they'd had this conversation before.
"My side, it's nothing."
"On a scale of one to ten?"
"Manageable."
Carlisle looked at her pointedly.
She sighed. "An eight, maybe."
"Will you allow me to give you some medicine, now?"
"No. I want to be clear-headed."
"Bells," Charlie chastised gently. "If the doc thinks you need something, you should take it."
Charlie looked to Carlisle for confirmation. Bella looked down at her hands.
Carlisle spoke softly. "Charlie, it's Bella's body. She is in control of what she wants to do." At Charlie's skeptical look, he hastened to address Charlie's unspoken concern. "You don't need to worry. I was only asking about pain medication, her refusal will in no way slow her recovery."
Charlie's misgivings were apparent on his face. "I don't want you hurting, Bells."
"Don't worry, Dad, I'll take the medication if it gets to be too much."
"See that you do."
Noticing how haggard Charlie looked, Carlisle moved a plush armchair to the side of Bella's bed. "Please, Charlie, sit down."
Charlie settled into the oversized chair gratefully.
Carlisle flipped open his cell phone and pushed a single button.
Before any conversation could begin again, Alice came into the room, her demeanor unusually subdued.
Carlisle spoke softly. "Alice, the Chief has had a difficult drive and a long night of worrying before that, can you bring him something to eat and drink, please?"
Alice nodded to Carlisle. "Hi, Charlie."
"Hey, Alice." He turned to Carlisle. "That's nice of you, but I'm fine."
"Dad, you need to eat. Don't make me worry about you." Bella tried to smile again, but it was pained.
Carlisle's voice became beseeching as he approached Bella's side. "Isabella, please allow me to give you some pain medication. It sounds like your father has his work covered. I'm sure he'll be here when you wake up."
Charlie smiled at Bella. "That I will, kiddo. Come on now, you do what the doc says, and I'll let Alice get me something to eat."
Bella looked around Carlisle. "Alice! I saw that."
Alice had pushed the button on Bella's Morphine pump.
"Charlie has seen you, so he's satisfied that you'll live. You need pain medication. Even I can see that. You can make your own decisions when they're the right ones," Alice pronounced with a triumphant smile. "Now close your eyes and get some rest. You know Carlisle will be right here with you. He won't leave you." She turned and smiled at Charlie. "And, while you rest, I'll take Charlie somewhere nicer than a hospital room to eat. When you wake up, we'll both be back."
"Alice," Carlisle admonished, his voice quiet but nonetheless authoritative. "Do not ever presume to take Isabella's choices from her again." He didn't elaborate. The look he gave Alice was enough.
"Oh! I'm sorry, Carlisle. I thought I was helping."
"I know you did," Carlisle said gently. "But I find it distressing to think that you could so easily disregard another's freedom of choice."
"I didn't think of it like that." Alice sounded honestly contrite. "I won't do it again." She turned her attention to Bella. "I'm so sorry, Bella."
"It's okay, Alice," Bella smiled weakly.
Charlie spoke up, "You're a good girl, Alice."
Alice beamed at him and took his arm. Bella was asleep before the door closed behind them.
Alice and Charlie returned to find a nurse hovering by Bella's door. "Why don't you both wait in here until the doctor is finished," she ordered, opening a door beside Bella's room for them.
Charlie and Alice both stared in amazement. One wall held a large rectangle of one-way glass. They could clearly see into Bella's room. "Doesn't Bella get any privacy?" Charlie grumbled.
Alice was clearly annoyed by the work crew's oversight. "I didn't know this was here. I'll cover it as soon as we can get into Bella's room."
"I'm sure she'll appreciate that, Alice."
Alice could hear Carlisle consulting with another doctor while Bella slept. The doctor was asking Carlisle's advice about the treatment of one of his patients. Charlie's worried expression prompted Alice to volunteer some information. "Don't worry, Charlie, they aren't talking about Bella. Dr. Clinton is getting Carlisle's advice about how to treat one of his patients. He's not Bella's doctor. Carlisle's advising him in Bella's room because when emergency services were called she asked Carlisle not to leave her. He promised her that he wouldn't leave her. He takes his promises very seriously. He won't leave her, not for a minute, so Dr. Clinton came to him here."
"Huh." Charlie's expression was contemplative. "Carlisle does a lot of that, helping other doctors?"
Alice answered absently. "Yeah, all over the country, sometimes in other parts of the world."
Carlisle was in the outfit he wore to go skating instead of his usual work clothes. Charlie studied Carlisle silently. "He looks awfully young."
Everyone usually believed Carlisle's presumed age without question. His clothes, mannerisms, degrees, and experience all added to the illusion. Recently, Alice had seen a vision where some people at Forks Community Hospital overheard Emmett teasing Carlisle about his age, his human age of twenty-three. After that vision, she and Jasper had preemptively changed all of Carlisle's records and documents to make him twenty-three. She thought that if her vision came to pass, and the hospital administration tried to verify any of Carlisle's information, it would be best if they didn't find anything amiss. If that vision failed to happen no one would look at his records, so it didn't matter.
Alice realized she needed to respond to Charlie's comment about Carlisle's youth. After all, as the chief of police, even in a small town like Forks, he had access to everyone's records. "Carlisle graduated from Medical school at sixteen. After his internship, they realized he was a true prodigy. His residency was accelerated. He was made an attending at nineteen, as well as becoming a full member of the American College of Surgeons and The American College of Emergency Physicians too." She paused and smiled thoughtfully. "He's a bit of a medical genius. He tries to look older. He's sensitive about his age. Normally, he won't set foot in a hospital without trying to appear older. But he came here in the ambulance with Bella, right from the skating rink. He didn't have time to change into his old man clothes."
Charlie's brow furrowed. "He's such a good doctor. Alice, how old is he? How much experience does he really have?"
"Well, we started this conversation discussing what a well-respected doctor he is, and you've known him for a couple of years. How many lives do you know of that Carlisle has saved?"
Charlie was thoughtful. "He's saved a lot of lives in Forks."
"Being a fair-minded man, I bet you'll judge him by his abilities and not his age," Alice smiled beguilingly.
"You don't need to give me that look, Alice. You know how much I respect Dr. Cullen. I'm just curious."
"Since when is the Chief of Police ever just curious?"
Charlie laughed ruefully. "This time."
Alice smiled. "Carlisle is twenty-three."
Charlie couldn't hide his amazement. "Twenty-three?"
"Yes, but please, Charlie, don't spread that around. It makes him extremely uncomfortable. Everyone assumes he's older, and he just has a baby face." Alice's next words were spoken slowly and with emphasis. "His age doesn't make him any less competent."
"Yeah, I guess not. I can see for myself that older doctors come to him for help. He certainly acts more mature than twenty-three, I would never have guessed his age. I'm like everyone else, I just assumed that he was older because he's such a good doctor." Charlie scratched his chin in thought. "How does a guy that young parent kids that are almost the same age he is?"
"He doesn't parent us. He provides for us. He cares for us like we care for him. He does his best for us. Like a big brother. But our real parental figure is Esme."
"He married an older woman."
"No!" Alice laughed. "Carlisle isn't married. That's just the assumption some people in a small town made. Esme is Carlisle's older sister. She doesn't have a family of her own; but, she's a natural mother. She just took us in. Because she and Carlisle have the same last name, and they're both our emergency contacts at school. I suppose that's why some people assumed they were married. They are definitely not married. They are brother and sister. You can feel to correct people on that one." Alice winked cheekily at Charlie.
"Any more skeletons in the Cullen closet?" Charlie joked.
"I think that's enough for now, don't you?" Alice's openness and ready laughter put Charlie's mind at ease.
Charlie nodded. "Carlisle's a good doctor. He's a good man. It must have been hard on him."
"His life has been hard at times." Alice's genuine fondness for Carlisle was obvious. "But he loves helping people so much. He focuses on that. I'm pretty sure he must have been that way even as a small child."
"It shows."
They watched as Dr. Clinton shook Carlisle's hand, obviously grateful for his input. When the other doctor was gone, they watched as Carlisle sat beside a sleeping Bella. They saw him take her hand in his while his other hand gently smoothed the hair off her forehead. Their quiet observation was interrupted by the nurse appearing in the doorway and telling them that they could go into Bella's room now.
When Bella woke she saw Carlisle, Alice and Charlie seated together on a leather sectional, talking quietly. They were discussing taxes. It was a common topic at this time of year, there were only six days left to get them in on time. Her eavesdropping was interrupted by a knock on her door. Alice rose to open it. She watched as Jacob pushed Billy's wheelchair into the room.
Bella looked at Carlisle who caught her eye. He knew that she was awake. She tried desperately to send him an unspoken message, to go along with her pretense of sleep. His eyes sparkled as he gave her a small secret smile, which she returned before closing her eyes.
Alice pretended not to notice their byplay and wrinkled her nose at the newcomers who were now asking Charlie about Bella's health.
Bella heard Charlie tell the Blacks about her broken forearm, partial splenectomy, and subdural hematoma. Carlisle had already explained her condition to her upon her first post-surgical awakening. She knew her subdural hematoma was not serious. It was just being watched to make sure it remained that way. She knew she'd make a full recovery from the exploratory surgery that had resulted in the removal of a portion of her spleen, which would regenerate with time. Her cracked ribs were no real concern; they hadn't punctured any of her organs. Her broken arm would mend and all her lacerations and contusions would heal.
Everyone who hadn't been at the ice skating rink assumed she had managed to cause this harm to herself. She had convinced Carlisle and the family not to tell anyone that Edward had been the cause. They acquiesced only after she explained that she really couldn't handle dealing with the fallout if people, especially Charlie, knew Edward had hurt her, even accidentally. Considering her vast medical history, everyone she had encountered so far had assumed the skating accident had been the result of her own clumsiness. Had that not been true, she knew Billy Black would try to find some way to blame the Cullens. She didn't have the energy to deal with him now, so she continued to feign sleep. After about half an hour, she heard Billy and her dad head to the cafeteria for coffee.
Jacob laughed. "You can open your eyes now, Bella."
She opened her eyes to find Jacob hovering near her head. "You knew I was faking?"
"Yeah, it was obvious, you know you're a terrible actress. Don't worry, though, you were good enough to fool our dads."
"I can't be that bad if it's only your werewolf senses that can't be fooled."
Jacob's voice was teasingly solemn. "I'm a shapeshifter, Bella, not a werewolf. Get it straight." They laughed as Carlisle and Alice seated themselves across the room and began going over some paperwork.
Jacob turned serious. "So, Bella, you gonna tell me what happened?"
"You know me, Jake." She smiled a bit too brightly.
"Yeah, I do. So, I know when there's something you're trying to avoid telling me."
"I was at the ice rink, and I was skating really well for a beginner." Her pride in her skating was obvious in her eyes.
"Yeah, you on ice, huh? I wish I'd seen that. So, if you were doing so good, how'd you end up in here?"
"I decided to become acquainted with the wall." She gave Jake a look that she hoped would end his line of inquiry.
"Who introduced you to the wall?"
Bella hedged. "Oh, we're old friends. That wall and I go way back."
"You're not gonna tell me?"
They engaged in a silent, albeit brief, battle of wills.
Jacob huffed in annoyance. "Okay, I'll tell you. Your bloodsucker boyfriend-"
Bella cut across Jacob. "Edward isn't my boyfriend." Her tone was sharp with finality. "We decided that we want to be friends but nothing more."
"Yeah? Like you and me, friends, good friends, but no romantic stuff?" Jake asked bitterly.
Bella's voice was soft with understanding. "Yeah, like that."
"Hmm. So, is that why he threw you into a wall?"
"Jake, no! It was an accident!"
Jacob's voice deepened with fury. "That leech caused this. He put you in here." It wasn't a question.
"Jake, show some respect," Bella admonished.
"Don't worry about us, Bella," Alice's bell-like voice quipped. "He's all bark."
"I wasn't talking to you, Leechette." Jacob reigned in his fury, his full attention back on Bella. "Dad and I stopped by to see how you were earlier. We didn't want to interrupt. We were in that room, waiting to see you." Jacob pointed to the glass square on the wall.
"Oh!" Alice exclaimed. "I need to cover that." She moved quickly out of the room.
"What's Alice doing?" Bella asked.
Jacob answered. "That's a one-way mirror, you can see into this room from the room beyond it, and if you're not simply human, you can hear everything too. We were here...earlier."
Carlisle looked up at Jacob. "I knew you were there but I didn't notice when you arrived. I was a bit preoccupied."
"Yeah, I didn't think you guys ever missed anything."
"Not usually, but if we become focused on something, it's possible."
"Good to know, I'll remember that," Jacob smirked.
Carlisle's tone was soft and sad. "What did you hear, Jacob?"
Jacob's jovial taunting immediately ceased. "I heard everything you said to the filthy leech that did this to her!" Jacob's anger at Edward was undisguised. "No offense, Dr. Fang, you defended Bella. You took good care of her. Even my dad was impressed with you. He never thought he'd see one of you take the side of a human over one of your own."
"Then in that, Billy Black and I are in accord. Edward's actions are inexcusable."
Bella's voice was soft. "Carlisle, we need to talk about Edward."
"Can it wait until you are better?" Carlisle asked gently.
Bella sighed.
Carlisle hurried to add, "Of course, if waiting will cause you stress, then we should talk now. I don't want you to put any more stress on your healing body than is absolutely necessary. Although, it would be best if you could put it out of your mind, just until you have healed."
"There's nothing to talk about, " Jacob interrupted. He looked at Carlisle. "It's just too bad you're such a pacifist. But don't worry, if I ever see..." Jacob stopped mid-sentence. "Our dads are back."
Billy and Charlie entered the room side by side, with Billy trying to run over Charlie's feet. "Bells, you're awake," Charlie observed.
Carlisle never left Bella's side. Rumors were averted because she had such a posh private suite. The staff assumed that anyone would rather eat in there than the cafeteria. The room's bathroom had been the topic of a lot of hospital gossip; it wasn't like any other facility in the whole building, possibly even all of Seattle. Any staff member would have been happy to care for Bella and never venture into the bleak utilitarianism of the rest of the hospital. They couldn't blame Dr. Cullen for taking advantage of the situation.
A nurse entered the room without knocking. Carlisle gave her a stern look as he accepted blood from her.
Bella groaned. "More blood?"
Carlisle hung the blood and smiled mischievously. "Someone must be pilfering yours when you're asleep."
She laughed. "Seriously, Carlisle, how much do I need?"
"Hopefully, this will be the last transfusion you will need." He sat on the edge of her oversized bed, near her waist, and spoke seriously. "You will need immunizations before you are released. You'll be prone to catching anything that comes along for a while. Right now you have no sign of a bacterial infection, so that's good."
"This is pretty serious, then?"
"Not overly, they didn't have to take that much of your spleen. In a while, it should compensate on its own. Until then, we just need to take precautions. If you should catch the flu," he said with a devastating smile, "you have your own personal physician to care for you night and day."
She smiled. "Thank you, Carlisle, for all you're doing."
He leaned towards her and spoke in a long-suffering tone. "Well, I am reduced to performing the menial tasks that should be done by a mere nurse."
"Carlisle!" Bella laughed. "I'm serious. You took time off from the hospital, you-"
He covered her lips with his fingers and whispered, "I know you were serious, Isabella." Her heart stuttered at the way his voice seemed to cherish her name. Coming from his lips it was almost a caress. His British vowels made themselves known in his soft tone as he continued speaking. "There is no need to thank me. I wish I could change what happened. I would do anything to keep you from being hurt in any way. But caring for you, that is a singular pleasure. There is no need for thanks. I am here because I want to be. You mean so much to me... to us. His hand slid to cup her jaw affectionately and his thumb began softly brushing back and forth over her cheekbone. She unconsciously leaned into the contact and closed her eyes. "Sleep now," he said, his voice blanketing her in its warmth. "I will be right here with you."
Bella opened her eyes to the whirlwind that was Alice, accompanied by Jasper. Only this time the wind smelled like food. The tantalizing aroma of chocolate wafted to her.
Alice started taking food out of a bag. "So, now that you can eat solid food, I've brought you some award winning offerings from one of Seattle's best. We have a tarte flambée to start."
Jasper's smile was a bit strained as he drawled, "For us Americans, that's a bacon, onion and cheese tart."
Alice glared at him playfully before continuing. "Salade aux betteraves et noissetes-"
"Salad with beets, hazelnuts, and blue cheese." Jasper interpreted helpfully.
"Coq au vin." Alice continued quickly before Jasper could interrupt her again. "And for dessert, terrine au chocolat followed by assiétte de fromages." Alice looked very pleased with herself.
"And that's, chicken, some sort of chocolate dessert and a cheese course." Jasper ducked as Alice swatted at him teasingly.
Carlisle smiled at Alice indulgently. "That sounds lovely, Alice, but I think Bella's system might do better with something a little less sophisticated, to begin with."
Alice looked crestfallen. Jasper put his arm around her and pulled her to his side. "Now darlin', you know she'd love it if Carlisle would let her eat it."
Bella mustered an enthusiastic expression. "I really would, Alice, it smells wonderful. Maybe you could get it again when I'm well enough?"
Alice brightened, "Yes! As soon as you're given the medical okay to eat real food, I'll bring you everything again. I'm so sorry I tempted you with it before Carlisle would let you eat it."
Bella smiled. "That's okay, Alice. I'll have something to look forward to."
Jasper began putting the food back into the bag. "We brought enough for everyone on this floor. We left it in the hall. We'll just add yours to it, and Alice can feed the staff."
"See, Jazz," Alice chirped as they made their way out. "I told you that you'd be fine in a hospital."
When they were alone again, Carlisle sat on the edge of Bella's bed his eyes dancing with mirth. "You know you're going to have to eat that another day."
During one of Bella's last visits to the Cullen home she and Carlisle had gone for a long walk in the woods. They had discussed a wide range of topics, and somehow her dislike of French food had come up.
Bella sighed. "Do you think I can go back on a liquid diet?"
Carlisle chuckled. "I don't think that would be wise. Why don't I send Alice to get some vanilla yogurt and soft fruit for you?"
"Thanks, Carlisle," Bella smiled shyly. She was thoughtful for a moment. "Won't Alice feeding haute cuisine to the whole hospital floor draw unwanted attention to you?"
"Not really. They'll be thankful, perhaps there will be a little inter-hospital gossip about Alice's choice of food, but it won't be anything to be concerned about. Patient's families are always feeding the staff. It's how they express their gratitude."
"Charlie never did that, and I've been in the hospital a lot."
"Not to worry, it's usually a female family member who brings food. Speaking of your father, I talked to him while you were sleeping. How do you feel about getting out of here?"
"Really?" Bella's face shone with eagerness.
"You certainly aren't ready to be on your own yet or to navigate your father's house. However, under my supervision, and with Alice's help, I think you'd be fine at our house."
"I don't want to impose."
"It would be no imposition.
"I suppose I already am imposing, with you and Alice being here all the time."
"You know that you are no imposition, either here or at home," Carlisle assured her sincerely. "I know you, Isabella Swan, you have a kind heart to a fault. You plan to force French food down so that Alice's feelings won't be hurt." His smile was knowing. "That's how I know you would never crush Emmett's feelings by not using the room he just built for you."
"Emmett built a room for me, at your house?"
"Of course, and Esme decorated it. Everyone wants to contribute to your recovery."
"Does Charlie know Emmett built a room for me?"
"He knows that a room was made ready for you, yes. You may be an adult, and you certainly don't need your father's permission, but I wanted to make sure he was included. Esme is giving him the grand tour now, I'm sure he'll be happier having you back in Forks, so he can spend more time with you. It's hard for him to get to Seattle and keep up with his work."
Bella bit her bottom lip. "I don't want to make things more difficult for Jasper. It isn't fair to him to have a human in the house for all that time."
"It won't be a problem for Jasper. His control has vastly improved. You just saw him in a hospital full of bleeding humans. It doesn't get much more tempting than that. However, if he feels challenged, he'll just go for a run and have a bite to eat in the forest."
"I can't put him out like that."
"Isabella, you will not be imposing or putting anyone out. Understand?"
"If you're sure?"
"I am."
The room's landline rang, ending their discussion. Carlisle smiled, lifted the receiver and handed it to Bella.
"Hello. I'm fine, Mom, really... Charlie was right, you don't need to come all the way out here. No. It's nothing serious..."
Carlisle rose to give Bella privacy to speak with her mother, but he was stopped by Bella grasping his hand. She gave him an apologetic look. He gave her a tender smile and allowed her to pull him back down beside her.
Bella woke slowly. She turned her head to face the window. It was twilight. Her room was insulated from the sounds of the rest of the hospital and Carlisle had turned the sounds off on all the medical machinery. A vampire doctor was much more aware of what was going on without the need of alarms than a human doctor with the aid of all the finest technology. At first, she thought all was quiet and then she realized there were voices in the distance. No, there were voices in her bathroom. She listened intently.
"There is absolutely no way-"
"Carlisle, she didn't mean it literally."
"I do not break my word. I promised Isabella that I won't leave her alone." There was a pause in their conversation. "She's awake."
Alice put her hand on Carlisle's arm to stop him from going immediately to Bella.
"What's this about, Carlisle? She knows you won't leave her. If what Edward did gave her abandonment issues she still won't expect you to stay glued to her side. You can go help Dr.-"
"No, Alice."
"She asked you not to leave her when she was in an ambulance. Don't you think she meant until she was out of danger?"
"This discussion is over."
"Fine. Let some inconsequential patient of Dr. Clinton's die. Why should you help them when Bella might need some Jello?"
Carlisle's tone was clearly upbraiding. "Alice!"
"I won't say anything more about it." Alice's tone was not pleased. "But there is something else, I think you need to think some things through, Carlisle."
Carlisle sighed. "What now, Alice?"
"Edward."
Carlisle's response was a feral growl.
"Exactly." Alice sounded triumphant.
Carlisle immediately looked abashed.
"I'm not criticizing you," Alice spoke with affection. "I just think you should figure out why you are reacting so strongly." She spoke cryptically before Carlisle could respond. "Not that there's anything wrong with it, there isn't. I, for one, am very happy about it!" She hopped up and kissed Carlisle on the cheek. In a voice, so quiet Bella could barely make it out she added, "And I'm not the only one who is happy about it."
"Alice, what are you talking..." Carlisle trailed off as Alice had already left the bathroom.
"Bella," Alice's voice was all innocence. "You don't mind if Jazz and I sit with you while Carlisle scrubs in on a delicate surgery, do you?"
"Of course not." Bella caught Carlisle's eye. "Go save lives. I'm not an excuse for you to skive off."
Carlisle looked doubtful.
"Seriously, Carlisle, I can't be responsible for someone's death just because I want your company."
He crossed the room and was at her side with vampire speed. "Isabella, I can't be everywhere at once, and I can't save everyone. That's something I learned to live with a long time ago. I have to do what I can and walk away at the end of the day. Even I will burn out if I don't take time for myself, then I'll be no good to anyone."
"But you aren't burnt out right now, are you?"
Carlisle smiled. "No, I'm not."
She returned his smile. "Well then, that's good for the patient who needs your skill, Dr. Cullen."
"It is."
"When are you needed in surgery?" Bella asked as Alice slipped out of the room.
"Not for an hour at least. The patient has to be stabilized."
"Tell me."
Carlisle smiled and sat on the edge of Bella's bed.
"Tell you what?" he asked teasingly.
"Tell me about when you had a burnout."
Carlisle smiled. "It was during a Cholera epidemic in New York. I wanted to save as many as I could, but of course, I couldn't work twenty-four hours a day without attracting notice. I decided that I could be my own twin brother. I knew I couldn't get away with it in the same city. So, I took work in hospitals in both New York City and Boston. I ran back and forth between my two positions. I'd work as long as I could without raising suspicion at one place, and then I'd run to the next and do it all over again." Carlisle's smile was self-deprecating. "I was foolish and arrogant. With the Cholera in New York, I'd push fluids and Oral Rehydrating Salts on patients. I'd take vitals and declare deaths. In Boston, I was working mostly as I do now. I treated some illnesses but most of my work was caring for accidents and emergencies.
"I ran from city to city through the trees, deep enough in the forests that no human eyes could detect me, but I could still hear the road. On one of my commutes, there was a terrible carriage accident. I had to help. It was bad. There had been heavy rains and the roadside had given way under the vehicle. The carriage and horses were at the bottom of a ravine. One young man, who I presumed to be the driver, had been thrown. One of his legs was crushed under a dead horse. The other horse was injured and thrashing next to him. I had to break its neck to keep it from killing him. Then, I saw another man, who was already lost, his head was split open on a boulder, brain matter was evident. I was sure he died almost on impact. There was a little girl, no more than three or four, wandering and in shock. She seemed to have no more than a dislocated shoulder and broken arm. Then I saw a woman who had to be her mother. Her condition was quite grave. Not only was she seriously injured, but the accident had sent her into labor.
"For the man under the horse, the best I could do was an on-site amputation and cauterization. I had my bag but I had no medications left in it. I had planned to restock when I arrived in Boston. I built a fire and set to work. Fortunately, he passed out rather quickly. When that was done, I checked the woman. There was not much I could do for her, she had internal injuries. If I attempted a crude operation, it would have killed her. Those kinds of operations, especially back then, often did more harm than good in the best of circumstances. Being in labor there was no chance she would survive it. I did all that I could to stabilize the woman and I made her as comfortable as possible. I popped the little girl's shoulder in and set her arm with strips of fabric that I tore from my overcoat and a wooden splint made from the wreckage. The woman's labor was progressing, I helped her through it, I did all that could be done under those conditions. She gave birth to an uninjured girl. She barely saw her baby before she succumbed to her blood loss. During all the time that took, no one passed on the road above.
"There was a lot less traffic in those days. There were two good wheels and an axel that were undamaged. I was forced to craft a two-wheeled cart for the injured man. I knew the principle but I'm no craftsman. By the time it was ready, he had regained consciousness. I discovered that he was not the driver, he was the little girl's older brother. The two dead were their parents, his father had been driving. I found a stream, luckily my enhanced senses could tell that the water was clean. I gave them water and then we began the trek to Boston. I carried the cart and then them in turn to the top of the ravine. I pulled the cart with one hand and carried the baby. The young man held and comforted his sister on the long road to Boston."
Carlisle paused in thought for a few moments. "I thought I was doing good. I thought I was helping. When I got to the hospital with my patients from the road, I was congratulated. I had saved the young man's and the infant's lives. Of that, there was no doubt. Untreated the little girl would probably have died as well, from shock and exposure. I saved her too. But at what price? A patient I'd been caring for at the Boston hospital had died. If I had been there, I could have saved her. When I was in my office holding her death certificate, I realized that it wasn't my stop at the carriage accident that had caused her death. She died while I was ending my shift in New York. If I hadn't tried to hold both positions, she would have lived. My arrogance caused her death. But, it also saved the lives of others." Carlisle laughed bitterly. "How could I choose where to be, who to save? I left the hospital in a daze. I wandered north. After a few hours, the emotional pain and confusion got to be too much. I lashed out. I took out almost a whole forest with my undirected rage. When I was spent, I sat in the middle of the wreckage. I blamed God. I blamed the vampire race. Mostly, I blamed myself. If only I were smarter, more dedicated, less flawed..."
Carlisle looked down as Bella took his hand in hers. He was temporarily mesmerized by the sight of their joined hands. He twined his fingers with hers and studied the perfection of their joining.
He continued looking at their hands as he began to speak again. "It was a long time later that my friend Eleazar tracked me. He brought me game, he forced me to drink it. He sat with me and talked me back from the brink."
Carlisle looked into Bella's eyes. "I came out of that personal crisis knowing that even a vampire has to take the time to take care of himself in order to care for others. If I give everything away, then I have nothing left to give. I won't even be able to make sense of myself, and if I can't make sense of myself, then I can't make sense of others or the world around me."
"What did you do, after Eleazar fed you physically and spiritually?"
"We burnt the forest I had destroyed. I was lucky that no human had happened upon it. That suspicious phenomenon would have alerted the Volturi. With the burning, the depletion looked natural, and the forest was able to revive."
Bella withdrew her hand from Carlisle's and moved it up his arm to rest on his neck. He bowed his head at her touch.
Their moment of silent commune was interrupted by Alice entering the room, towing Jasper in her wake. "Carlisle, they'll be looking for you soon. Dr. Clinton's patient is stabilized and ready for surgery. He'll need to know if you're going to assist."
Bella spoke for him. "He will."
Carlisle smiled into Bella's eyes as Alice continued. "We'll stay here with Bella until you get back."
Bella gave Alice a stern look. "I'm fine on my own, Alice."
"I know you would be." Alice tapped her head. "But we want to stay."
Carlisle looked meaningfully at Alice. "I think just you should stay. Let Jasper do something else." Alice was taken aback by the fierce protectiveness coming from Carlisle.
"Jasper's fine. The blood isn't bothering him."
"I'm in complete control, and I'd like to talk to you, Bella, it's been a while since we've talked."
Only Jasper and Alice heard the growl beginning in Carlisle's throat. Alice watched as Carlisle realized the growl was coming from him. She stared intently at him as his expression became one of pure self-castigation. He had clearly startled himself with his actions.
Jasper spoke slowly and deliberately. "But, I think I'll head on home to Forks, see if I can be any help there. Why don't I give you a call and we can talk over the phone?"
Alice didn't try to mask her irritation. "Is that okay, Carlisle?"
Carlisle nodded to her, then turned and spoke to Bella. "I'll be back as soon as this surgery is through."
