A few weeks have passed since Gina's mom died. Her aunt had organized all the funeral plans for her mother and made sure it would be over spring break so the girl wouldn't miss school. The body was shipped from Washington, where she died to Louisiana, where her aunt and the rest of her extended family is living and where they would have the funeral service. After the funeral service her mom would be cremated like her father was and Gina would be given the woman's cremated remains.

While her aunt, Beth had originally said that she would be too busy to have another kid. Gina had convinced her to let her stay there while she was in Louisiana for the funeral and if that went well Beth would think about adopting the girl. Gina knows her aunt isn't the nicest and will probably expect her to act like a third parent for the twins she really just wants a home, she wanted to be able to stay in a house that was her's. She has been staying in a foster home in Salt lake for the past few weeks and she constantly felt like a guest. Though there was a certain comfort in the familiarity of moving again.

But all that was to deal with later, now she just has to wait until the plane she's on takes off then lands in Louisiana where she'll have to search for her aunt. She's old enough to choose to not fly as an unaccompanied minor and she had been travelling alone for a long time now. There were a lot of family gatherings that her mom couldn't make it to so she had to go alone, or times where her mom had to leave only a few weeks before the end of the school year. She always hated the unaccompanied minor programs, they would treat her like a baby and never trust her to do anything alone. Though as soon as you turn 14 you can fly alone without the program so she chose that option as soon as she could.

Though without the program she would have to sit next to someone on the flight, normally they just mind their business but sometimes it could get pretty uncomfortable. As she waits for whoever was in the seat next to hers to come as she brings out her knitting needles and some yarn.

"Have I met you before, cause you look super familiar?" She lifts her head up to find that it was one of the first friends she had ever made "Yeah, Jack right, don't you remember me from Mary Grey Elementary School. My name's Gina Porter, I left after 3rd grade cause my mom started working for FEMA"

She knew him before her dad died and he was basically her best friend from kindergarten to grade 3. Leaving him behind was the hardest thing she had ever had to do and after that she gave up on forming real connections until she came to East High. But she knew that it wasn't nearly as hard for him to leave her, he got to keep the rest of his friends and not move houses. But she still hopes that he had missed her as much as she missed him.

"Ah, I knew it, I could never forget your face, I guess I'm sitting next to you on this flight" he says as he sits down. "What a lucky coincidence, so why are you in Salt Lake and why are you going to Louisiana?"

"Me and my parents just moved here, we're just taking a trip to Louisiana to visit family. and I assume that I just missed you in Salt Lake and now you and your mom are moving again"

"Close, but I'm actually going to Louisiana for my mother's funeral and maybe to be adopted by my aunt, maybe I'll go into the foster care system near Salt Lake, so I might see you around"

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry I didn't know your mom had died" He puts a hand over his mouth in shock.

"Don't worry it's fine"

Jake for a minute thought about the logistics of Gina going to her mother's funeral in a different town than the one she was living in, but figured that they had talked enough about the girl's dead mom. "So you like knitting" Jake says while pointing at her yarn and knitting needles.

"Yeah it's really fun, good way to pass the time"

"Really? I always thought that crochet was a superior yarn craft" he jokingly teases her while taking out a ball of yarn and crochet hook.

"Seriously crocheting is stupid," she returns the teasing "like you think you're so better than us because you only have 1 stick"

"Okay, first it's not a stick, it's a hook. And second how do you knitters do anything with only the control of 2 sticks"

"Ohh, so are you admitting that you don't have the hand-eye coordination skills it takes to knit?"

"No, I'm saying that crochet is much more accessible and easier to learn. Plus crochet has a much prettier pattern than knitted things"

"No way, knitting is so much easier to learn, crocheting takes likes double the amount of yarn in order to make anything"

"Well, knitting takes way longer than crocheting"

"Really, do you want to have a race?" Jake challenges her.

"I would never say no to a race, one scarf, 6 inches by 55 inches" They get their yarn ready and start to make their scarves.

They talk to each other as they do it, trying to sike the other one out or just talking about what they've done since elementary school. While Jake was in the lead for most of it he ran out of yarn just a few inches from the finish.

"I think now we know what the better yarn craft is," Gina says victoriously.

"That doesn't count, if I had packed enough yarn I would've totally beaten you"

"But ya didn't"

"Ughh, what happened to make you so competitive now?"

She thought about that question for a while. After her dad had died her mom was a lot more in control of raising her and she was always really mad whenever Gina had failed at something. She didn't really realize how much her mother had affected her. She always assumed that the reason she was happier when her father was alive was because she had a father. But it also could've been because her mother had so much more of an effect on the girl without her father there to help with raising her. She was so happy in 3rd grade, while her mother would still yell at her and put way too much pressure on her the bulk of it happened after then. She missed who she was before everything happened, she used to be so much happier. Even though she probably wouldn't have been half as good at dancing as she is now, maybe she would enjoy it more. She loved dancing but there was always a pressure to it. If she messed up too much her mother might've pulled her out of her dance classes so she always had to make sure she didn't mess up.

"I guess I've changed since spending 8 years constantly changing schools and both of my parents dying"

"Oh yeah, I remember how much you changed before you left, you became so much quieter and sadder. You were always complaining about your mother, how you didn't want to be with her. Hey, I'm sorry for asking this but was she abusing you?"

"No, no. Don't worry I mean she was kinda yelling at me a lot and calling me a burden but it wasn't like abuse"

"You know that emotional abuse is abuse"

"Yeah, but... " Gina looks out the window, "I don't want to talk about it okay"

"Okay but just know that you deserve better than that" he puts his hand on her shoulder to try to comfort her.

Gina thought about that, at that point she had kinda given up on being a part of a healthy family. She was expecting to go and live with her aunt where she would continue to be berated and expected to do way too much. And she fears that staying in the foster care system would be even worse than that but maybe she would go into a home where everything would be okay.

"Yeah, thanks, I really hope we get to see each other again in Salt Lake. What school are you in?"

"I'm not sure yet, if you give me your phone number I'll text you when I find out"

"Okay, try to go to East High, it's the school I'm in right now"

"I'll see if I can"

They make more small talk until the plane lands and before they leave they exchange the scarves they made.


As Beth and Gina drive to the woman's house they make small talk about how much they miss Terri, Gina's mother. Gina had been thinking a lot about her mother and the last emotion she would describe her feelings as would be missing her. Maybe she missed her just a bit, but she knew her mother didn't deserve it. Though she couldn't say that to her aunt who had just lost the sister that she loved so very much, so she just lied. "Yeah she was such an amazing mother"

"I know, you must miss her so much"

"It must be so hard for you too, losing your little sister"

"Yeah, I remember how we would make mud cakes in the backyard while our parents were busy. When we were done we would always try to destroy each other's cake. I always got to her's first but she would start crying and make a bigger mess of mine"

Wow, what a nice story Gina sarcastically thought to herself. "You must have so many stories about her. What was my mom like as a kid?"

Her aunt goes back to telling semi-flattering stories of her mother until they arrive.

"Gosh I've been talking the entire way home, so what have you been up to dear? Still dancing?" Beth gets out of the car and goes to the truck to grab the girl's suitcase.

"Yeah, I'm playing Evan in my school's production of Dear Evan Hansen"

"Oh, that's nice. Aren't you going to miss it if we adopt you"

"Yeah, but it should be fine. I'm used to leaving schools before the big show" She notices the woman once again trying to discourage her from wanting to be adopted but continues to try to convince her aunt.

"Are you really sure you want to be adopted?"

"Yes"

"It's just, how could you try to replace your mother like that"

"I'm not trying to replace you with her, I just want to not be an orphan"

"You should be loyal to your mother!"

"My mother would have wanted me to have a home" Gina tries to plead with her as they go inside.


As they arrive at the funeral a couple days later Gina goes to take a seat in the front row but is stopped by someone who probably had worked with her mother somewhere saying how sorry he was. She just said that she was handling it well and tried to find her seat but was stopped by 3 other people saying the exact same thing.

Once it's her turn she goes up to the casket. Her mother looks just like she did when she was alive, her cheeks still plump and her hair still voluminous. The body had been embalmed in order to not have too much trouble while transporting it to Louisiana. Her eyebrows even still conveyed the feelings of disappointment that Gina received from her too often. It was strange with Terri laying there not moving or reacting to her daughter. The girl knew that her mother was dead and wouldn't move. But it was still a surprising sight to see, her mother was always a light sleeper and would get up whenever she saw her daughter doing something.

Gina reaches out her hand and grabs the corpse's, it was cold and rigid. Gina holds onto it, thinking about when her mother would walk her to school as a little kid and Gina would insist on holding her mother's hand so it wouldn't get cold. She had a lot of good memories with her mom, probably more good ones than bad ones. But the bad memories still tainted the good. But maybe she's just forcing herself to think that, maybe if she wanted to she could love her mother.

She had been away from her mother for quite a while and had grown self respect and learned that she shouldn't let her mother treat her that way. But right in front of her dead, helpless body she felt like things were back as they always were. Her mother being upset that the girl no longer loved her. Gina went back to feeling like loving her mother was a responsibility she had as an orphan.

But she couldn't love her mother, not after all that the woman did. She wasn't going to love a woman who had hurt her so badly. So Gina let go of the woman's hand and sat back at her seat without having shed a single tear.


Gina was going to go home a few days after the funeral so she had some time to spend with her extended family. But after all the "I'm so sorry your mom died"s there really wasn't much else to say other than please adopt me. Her aunt was still open to the idea despite feeling like it would be Gina replacing her mother.

Though as Gina stays at her aunt's house she realizes that her foster home was probably better than that. Her aunt's kids spend most of their time at home and she often has the responsibility of keeping them out of trouble by taking them to the park or a pool. They're easy to take care of for kids but it's still a lot of work to make sure they don't get lost or cause trouble. It's pretty much what Gina had expected it to be, she's supposed to help with dinner and do a lot of cleaning. She was at least hoping that she would get a little less work because her mom had died but it was as much work as she had gotten when she visited them before or more. Even though she wasn't happy with it she still did her best at everything Beth asked her to do. She hopes that if she is good enough she'll be adopted and maybe her aunt will lessen her work load because then she'll be the woman's daughter.

Though even after the 4 days of Gina putting all her time into helping the woman, her aunt was no more open to the idea of adopting the girl than before the funeral. So Gina went home without a mother, while she did have her mother's ashes but she wants a mother that's alive.


As Gina steps into the general area of the airport she quickly spots Dana who agreed to pick her up since the Caswell's are out of town for vacation. The woman's face lights up as soon as she spots the girl and runs up to her to grab her suitcase.

"Do you mind if I take you bags? How was your flight? How was the funeral?"

"Uhh, no, good, and okay"

"Sorry I guess I'm a bit too excited to see you"

As they walk to the car Gina thinks about why the woman was so excited, the two weren't that close so it probably wasn't because Gina had come back. Maybe something else was happening in her life or she just felt really energetic today.

"Oh, don't worry I'm probably just tired from the flight, jet lag you know?"

"Oh it's fine, so how was your trip, you were gonna ask your aunt to adopt you right? How did that go?"

"She might but I don't really like living at her house, I have too many chores to do there. But I guess it would be better than staying at my foster home"

"Hm, that's too bad"

They arrive at the car and get into it.

"So why didn't Nini come with you?" Gina asks.

"Oh, she was having trouble with Ricky or something. They have so many arguments that I no longer ask"

"Yeah, half of rehearsals are spent just making sure we can all get along with each other"

"Really, are they that much of a mess?"

"It's kind of everyone, I can't really say I'm not also part of the problem"

"Don't worry about it, it's your job as a teenager to cause issues"

"Really?"

"That's all I did as a teenager"

"I can't imagine you as causing trouble"

"People change as they get older, trust me you're gonna forget about everything that's happening," The woman glances over at the urn Gina has in her lap "Or at least most of it"

"Yeah, I hope so. I don't want the most memorable part of my life to be spent in foster homes"

"How do you know you'll spend it all in foster homes, you-" She gets cut off by Gina.

"Could get adopted, or maybe they'll let you stay with Ashlyn again" She says irritated, "Sorry it's just that so many people have been telling me that when realistically black teenagers aren't really wanted by families looking to adopt and my aunt doesn't want to adopt me so who's supposed to do it huh?"

Dana takes a deep breath then shyly looks over at the girl "... We could"

"huh"

"We were planning on telling you this over dinner but now seems like a pretty good time" Dana says, "Me and Carol have been talking and we feel like our family isn't really finished without you. Nini also thinks it's a really good idea, she's always wanted a sister. And we've already started talking to Katherine about it, she says you might be able to move in with us in just a month. But if you don't want us to that's also fine"

"wow" Gina shrinks into her seat, bringing her knees to her chest as her eyes tear up.

"You don't have to agreed to it now and I totally understand if you don't want us to adopt you but I just wanted to let you know that we do want to adopt you"

"... no one has ever wanted me," Gina quietly says.

"Oh sweetie, I'm sure your mom wanted you, she just also wanted you to be with your friends"

"No, she would yell at me, call me a burden, and never let me do anything like playing violin because that would be wasting her money. And I just don't really think she wanted me"

"Ohh, well I'm really sorry she treated you like that. You're a really amazing girl and I don't know why she wouldn't want you"

"Thank you," she put her head into her knees to think about what the woman had just told her. All she wanted was a home but now being offered it, it felt a bit restraining. She was used to being free and constantly moving around, now having to stay in the same place for the rest of high school. To be fair it would only be a couple years but that's much longer than she would normally stay at a school. If she were to stay at East High for another 2 years would they learn about who she really was. It was always easy to pretend to be whoever she wanted to be since she wouldn't have to hold it for less than half a year. But now she would have to let them know about who she really is, let them know her weaknesses and insecurities. And if it went wrong she wouldn't be able to run away, she only had one chance with this. But she also knew that running away wouldn't help her and that she couldn't continue to live like that. It certainly wouldn't help her heal from her trauma, but was she really ready to let someone in again.

They drive for a bit until they come up to an ice cream place.

"Oh hey, I love that ice cream place, do you wanna get some?" Dana breaks the silence, feeling that Gina has probably had enough time to think about the conversation they had.

"Yeah, I'd love to" she perks up, letting her knees off of her chest with a small, calm smile.

"Great, lets go" She parks at the ice cream place and they go into it.

"What's your favorite flavor from here?" Gina asks.

"They have an amazing gold medal ribbon!"

"I guess I'll have that then"

"So will I!"

They get their ice cream and sit down on a bench outside of the store.

"So about what you said earlier," Gina starts, "I would love for you to adopt me." She had thought about cutting herself off from people again but she decided that now was the best time to start opening up to people.

"I'm so glad, Gina,'' She gives the girl a big hug "This is gonna be amazing. We have a room set out for you, but if you don't like it there are a few other rooms you can have. We still have to prepare it for you, we didn't know how you would like it to look so we can go shopping for stuff over the next few days. And I'm probably getting way too into this way too quickly. Since you're gonna stay with us for the next few days, if you don't like living with us you can change our mind and it'll be fine!"

"Nonono, don't worry about it. I'm really excited about this too, I'll get to decorate a room without worrying about when I'll leave it. I don't think I'll be against you adopting me, I just have to learn to open up to people"

"Ok, don't worry if it takes you a long time to open up to us, I can totally understand why that'll be hard. So, we'll go to Home Sense tomorrow, do you have any ideas for what you want it to look like''

"I dunno, I've always wanted the kind of room you see on Pinterest but I also want it to be personal. I guess I could put up posters of all my favorite musicals, could I paint a design on one of my walls?!"

"Of course! What do you think you'll want to paint on it?"

"I dunno, but I've just always wanted to paint something on my walls. My mom never allowed me to"

"Well, don't worry about it. Just don't paint a bunch of dicks on you walls"

"I won't" She chuckles.

"Good"