Elend was honestly unsure as to whether he should feel safe in Marsh's presence or not. On the one hand, when he'd been on their side, he'd been a valuable ally. On the other hand, betrayal ran deep, and they still didn't know why he had.
Or... well, Elend could guess now that he had those remnants of Vin's memories. Hemalergy was definitely something she would have wanted him to know about. Hemalergy belonged to Ruin. Or, at least it was tied to Ruin just as much as Allamancy was tied to the mists and Preservation (he had no idea what feralchemy was tied to). Only mistings could use Allamancy, but anyone with the proper knowledge could use Hemalergy. Hemalergy had a much higher cost, though. At least, in Elend's opinion.
It also put one directly under Ruin's influence.
Well, that would have been nice to know when he'd been king the first time.
But how far did 'influence' go? Especially when it comes to Steel Inquisitors. Elend knew that Marsh had, at the fall of the Lord Ruler, had no less than eight separate spikes in his body. If one spike could put a person under Ruin's influence, would eight make the effect worse? Did Marsh even have a choice?
Part of him hoped so because Elend could think of few things worse than being trapped inside their own body. Part of Elend hoped not because the very real possibility that Marsh had never betrayed them put his mind at ease.
He'd never really quite forgiven Marsh for his part in... well, everything. Was that why he felt so uneasy around this man who had, as of this moment, done nothing to Elend?
Apparently his thoughts had shown more on his face than he would have liked.
"You know me," the deep voice of the very subject of Elend's thoughts brought him out of his reverie. "More than what you said before."
Elend didn't know how to answer. If he gave an affirmative, it could give the impression that the aristocracy was far more aware of him than they really were, which could send Marsh into hiding or away from Luthadel completely. If that happened, they would be lacking a seeker for their little coup when Kelsier came in a little under a year. But he couldn't exactly tell his 'escort' that he was from the future right now either. Even if he wanted to, it was still too open and other people – or even Ruin himself – could hear. He'd have to write everything down on metal if he wanted to tell anyone about his future memories.
That would take... a very long time.
Elend didn't bite his lip, but it was a near thing. He still hadn't answered and still wasn't completely sure of what to say? What would he have said as a king? Maybe... a half-truth?
"I... know of you," the house heir responded carefully.
"How?" Apparently terseness wasn't something he'd gained from becoming a Steel Inquisitor.
And he couldn't come up with any answer that would potentially help him or his cause without a price too high to bear.
"I... cannot say."
A frown. "Why not?"
He wanted to bite his lip or wring his hands, but he didn't. "The wrong ears may hear."
"No one is around."
Elend shook his head. "I cannot take that chance. But I can tell you this: my source is not utilized by any noble. That, I can guarantee."
"Other than you?"
"Other than myself."
Marsh didn't look happy, but he simply grunted and walked on in silence for several more blocks. Then:
"Why do I frighten you?" the larger man asked, sounding curious and puzzled.
That took Elend back a bit. "Frighten? You don't frighten me." Even as he said it, he realized how weak that sounded. And from the dry expression Marsh shot him over his shoulder, he didn't miss it. He practically heard Tindwell's exasperated sigh of utter frustration in his head.
"Most things don't frighten nobles. You're out here, running around in the mists like it's nothing, without a guard, without backup, rather more obviously reckless than most nobles I've met. You had no problem with a thug when he was about to beat you into the ground or one of the most talented soothers when he set a trap for you. But not me – probably the least overtly threatening of the lot," he sounded a touch annoyed as he said that, but he wasn't wrong. "So why?"
He'd stopped and now towered over Elend, who automatically straightened his back and looked the taller, broader man in the eyes, showing that he would not be cowed. Then he realized what he was doing – standing up to a threat, not a potential ally. Taking a deep breath, he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck with one gloved hand.
"You remind me of someone I met, once." It was the only thing he could really come up with that sounded remotely plausible. It had the side benefit of actually being true.
"Oh?" Marsh wasn't buying it. He folded his arms and just sat there, staring at Elend, expecting him to come clean.
Elend looked away. "He was a Steel Inquisitor." Still not technically untrue.
Apparently Marsh hadn't been expecting that. "How?" he asked incredulously.
The house heir breathed out before meeting the man's eyes (still strange) again. "The way you carry yourself, and your voice. I mean no offense. It just threw me off a little when I first saw you."
"Hmm," he responded, looking his young companion up and down. He wasn't buying it – knew Elend was keeping something back. And apparently he was done putting up with it. "What exactly are you hiding, Elend Venture?"
A younger Elend would have stumbled back and away from Marsh leaning into his personal space. The current Elend still had to swallow, but he also decided to channel his inner king, and set his jaw firmly.
"You cannot possibly tell me that you have no secrets that you are keeping from me."
Marsh didn't look impressed. "Why shouldn't I? I don't know you like you seem to know me."
"I don't know you," Elend responded, and if he sounded a little exasperated, who could blame him. "I know of you and you remind me of an inquisitor. Should that make me feel at ease somehow?"
More silence, then the man said slowly, "I find it interesting that you seem to know the inquisitors well enough to differentiate between them. I've never known anyone who could do that before."
Elend refused to let his own surprise and then frustration with himself show.
"I'm the heir to one of the most prestigious men in the government. That paints a large target on my back. I am not, to my knowledge, a misting. I have to have some way to keep myself alive, wouldn't you say? I'm observant and I put clues together quickly. I have to. If I don't have an edge, I die." Which was probably more true than he'd wanted to admit, even to himself, the first time around.
Marsh didn't seem to know what to say to that. Either that, or he didn't care to say anything.
"You can guarantee that no one knows what I look like?" He probably believed that because Elend himself hadn't known – quite obviously – initially.
Elend nodded.
"How sure are you?"
"Completely." He'd gone into the Obligator force in the previous timeline after all. "No one outside of whoever you have told knows of your continued existence, let alone anything else about you. If anyone does know anything, it would be vague at best and not from my source."
More silence and scrutiny. That seemed to be Marsh's natural state.
Then he turned and hurried down the street. "Come," was all he said.
They walked the rest of the way in silence.
Once they got there, Elend asked Marsh to be a distraction. He didn't look too happy about it, but he did nod and walk away. A couple of minutes later, Elend heard shouting. With a nod, he threw his make-shift rope up. Was it just him or was it actually harder to get it looped around something this time?
Eventually he was able to get it secure, and he climbed back over the wall – this time without landing on his backside, thank Preservation.
He hurried back to his room, found the bottom of the rope he'd hooked back and around some of the brown shrubs in a meager (but his best) effort to hide it, and then forced his aching arms to climb back into his quarters. Exhausted, he thoroughly searched the room before he allowed himself to relax.
Then he went to get the skaa who had come back on his orders. He'd even thanked him with a payment of bread before sending him on his way.
Then, and only then, did Elend allow himself to crash.
He was asleep moments after his head hit the pillow.
xXx
The next few days passed like normal. He ate with his father, tried not to attract too much attention and studied a lot. The only real difference was when he went to dueling practice a couple of mornings later. He didn't even have to try and hold back much in the lessons because he really, really needed more upper body strength to pull off any decent moves. And as much as he remembered how to duel, his body didn't. His trainer seemed to be happy that he was picking up on it very quickly, though.
At night, he would practically collapse into bed and hope he slept through to morning.
He rarely remembered his actual dreams. Well, when he'd initially been this age, he hadn't. Once he'd been dethroned, the nightmares had crept in. After they'd found the Well of Ascension, he'd found sleeping through the night difficult. He'd still tried, determined to get the rest his body needed. Having Vin there with him helped.
Since he'd come back in time, he found that his nightmares had become less frequent again, but more intense somehow. He'd wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and more or less claw his way to the balcony and then the mists. Much to his dismay, that had become his comfort, at least in part because it reminded him of Vin. Of course, that sense of paranoia was never happy with him sitting on his balcony in the mists like that, but compared to the heart-stopping horror of some of his dreams, it often felt muted or distant.
He didn't think he'd ever grow used to the nightmares, many of which he remembered vividly, but he still rarely remembered dreams. He certainly didn't remember ever being cognizant of being asleep while dreaming. Which was why he couldn't help but be surprised when one night, about a week after he'd initially spoken with Breeze, he found himself staring at a table set in front of him. Someone had filled it with more food of different varieties and colors than he'd ever thought possible, and yet, he knew it wasn't real.
For the first time, he felt he truly understood the term 'surreal'.
Blinking, he turned his head, taking in an otherwise bare room, large and bright, but not in the way that the Luthadel house ballrooms were. For one, the light came from outside, and for another, it wasn't light filtered through the clouds and ash in the air. No, this was full-on sunlight, warm and bright and welcoming. It poured in through a wall of windows behind him. They weren't even the stained glass windows that more or less all nobles aspired to have in their keeps and mansions, but clear glass that one would normally find on a private balcony. He'd never seen a wall of windows like that. Who would want a view of nothing but ash falling from the sky?
Feeling his eyes grow even wider, he got up to look more closely, but the landscape beyond the window drew his attention away from the masterfully crafted wall of glass.
"It's... green," he heard himself gasp out and felt his jaw drop because the air beyond the window was not only completely clear – as in he could see for leagues – but a calm, blue sky with only a few wisps of white clouds (they looked so... clean... and fluffy) filled the view, stretching over rolling hills covered in some sort of green plant that swayed in the soft breeze. He could see little flashes of other colors nestled into the green as they too danced in the air. Beyond that, he could see a line of trees with the typical brown bark of various shades, and foliage of even darker green...
Behind that, in the distance, he could see a low row of mountains, almost disappearing into the atmosphere. He'd never seen such an alien – but welcoming – sight in his life. 'Breathtaking' didn't begin to describe it.
"It is quite lovely, isn't it, Your Majesty," a familiar voice had Elend whipping around to find Sazed... well, he thought it was Sazed. He looked and sounded like the terrisman, with the exception that he did not have the veritable hoard of earrings and bracelets Elend remembered him wearing, but he also seemed... more somehow. His head remained bald and he wore no shoes, so no differences there, but his clothing... He wore robes of terrisman cut, but the stripes looked as if they carried vast spaces full of... were those stars? His future self had only seen them a couple of times, but they'd never looked quite like that, bunched together in clumps that moved and swirled lethargically.
Then his words registered to Elend and he frowned.
"I am a king no more," he said.
"It seems we will have to agree to disagree," the other replied, showing that small, placating smile of his.
Elend snorted softly, but didn't press the subject. Instead he glanced at the strange world outside the room as Sazed came to stand beside him.
"This... isn't me, is it."
The terrisman raised an eyebrow in question, so Elend clarified.
"This... dream. I know it's a dream, but it can't have come from me. I... could never imagine that," he waved his hand out to the rolling landscape. "Is the ground covered in plants? Green plants? Are those the flowers from the drawing?"
"Yes," Sazed said. He didn't expand, but Elend knew he'd answered affirmative to everything he'd asked.
"If... this isn't my dream, then what are you doing here? Not that I'm unhappy to see you." He paused for a moment as a realization came to his mind, "You are the Sazed I know from the future, correct?"
"Yes... and no."
Elend's frown deepened. "I think you'll need to explain that."
Sazed smiled and then gestured to the table behind them. Elend took one last look at the landscape before turning and retaking his chair. The food smelled delicious... but he knew he shouldn't be able to smell it. Dreams didn't work like that. Did they?
"This," Sazed said, "is a dream, but it is also a vision of sorts."
"A vision?"
The terrisman sat with his usual straight back as he tapped his chin thoughtfully. "I should give some context, I think. Just before the future Elend died, Vin, who had taken the power of Preservation into herself, sent a copy of your memories back to your younger self."
Elend nodded slowly. He'd figured something along those lines.
"Then you died. Out of a sense of duty, while also filled with grief, she turned and attacked Ruin. She joined you in death."
The breath caught in Elend's throat and his own heart clenched. He knew he didn't really know Vin right now, but the future memories... He did know her. He loved her. And knowing she'd died...
"I... watched. Ruin and Preservation both dying in one place, bodies separated from their powers as they left this realm. I was right there. The world burned and I saw the powers of the gods at my fingertips..."
"You took them," Elend concluded, eyebrows rising. "Both of them?"
"I had to," Sazed said wearily. "To save our world."
"But... wouldn't Ruin want to destroy it?"
"I am not Ruin."
"But you have his powers."
Sazed conceded with a slow nod. Then he looked at the table in front of them pointedly and back up at Elend. "You haven't eaten."
"This is a dream."
"Vision."
Elend opened his mouth to argue, but then paused at Sazed's amused expression before shrugging and reaching out to pick up a loaf of bread. It was the lightest colored bread he'd ever seen. He took a bite and froze as he realized he could taste it. Then he looked down at it and blinked.
"This... may just ruin my taste of food forever." He'd never tasted anything like that.
"It is rather good, isn't it."
The house heir's eyes narrowed. "You meant to do that."
Sazed shrugged, a little mischievous. "As you said, I hold Ruin's power too. But something Ruin never seemed to understand was that only existing matter could be ruined. He wanted to destroy everything, but then he would have had nothing left to Ruin. That would have driven him mad. Well, madder, I think."
"A thousand years of imprisonment isn't really good for anyone's mental state," Elend commented with a small shudder.
"No," Sazed said with a sigh. Somehow the world seemed to shift with it. Clouds gathered outside, gray and heavy, but still cleaner than anything Elend had ever seen in his world.
"This... is what our world should look like, isn't it," he asked softly as he watched changing weather.
The terrisman-turned-god nodded as fat drops of clear water began to splash against the window glass. Rain fell like a curtain then, loud and staccato as each drop pounded down on the building.
"Yes. This is very similar to the world as it was before the rise of the Lord Ruler."
Elend fell silent then, setting the bread down and simply looking out at the now gray world. Somehow, he still found it just as lovely as the bright sunlight. Just, different.
"If you're from the future," he finally said, his voice quiet, "that means Ruin is still alive in my younger self's time."
Sazed nodded. "And Preservation."
"And the Lord Ruler." It was obvious, and he'd known... but somehow, saying it made the knowledge heavier.
The god sighed again and the rain became hard. Ice balls began to pound on the glass. "Rashik wasn't... isn't a cruel or mean man. At the Well of Ascension, he was bitter and full of rage, but he cared about the world in general. He still does."
Elend snorted and sat back, gaze focused back on Sazed. "Then he doesn't really understand the state of the world right now. He's holding it – us – back."
"Erring on the side of caution," Sazed said with a sad nod. "Yes. And by doing so, he has indeed preserved the world, as the power he used would have encouraged him to do."
More silence as Elend contemplated that, frowning again. "He was also corrupted by Ruin," he finally pointed out.
The god nodded. "Yes, he was – is in your time. Evil sneaks in so easily, sometimes. But you, of all people, know how difficult it can be to see – let alone address – all of one's faults."
"Is Ruin evil then?"
The former terrisman looked away. "Ruin's powers of themselves are not evil, I think. Ruin himself liked to cause pain – liked to hurt people for the sake of hurting people. He likes to break people," Sazed looked back at Elend, who realized that the man's eyes were different as well. Instead of brown, they too seemed to hold a vast space inside them, filled with power and knowledge, and Elend realized he'd changed from past tense to present tense on purpose. "Hurting and breaking others and uncaring as to why – or even seeking to do so – that is evil, I think."
They sat there, staring at each other for what could have been seconds or years. Elend wasn't quite sure. Then, he felt himself opening his mouth.
"If you become a god in the future, but the others who held your power are still alive now, how are you here? Are you more powerful than them?"
Sazed rubbed his chin. "To an extent, you could say yes. But... I have no power over this world."
Elend couldn't help if his face twisted in puzzlement. "That makes no sense. This is your world."
"No, it isn't." He took a deep breath. The hail outside softened back into rain. "When Vin sent your memories back in time, she created a new world – a new universe, if you would." Elend's confusion must have shown plainly on his face because Sazed paused thoughtfully before starting again.
"Think of time as if it were a tree," he waved his hand and a tree literally grew from the center of the table. Elend blinked in surprise. "For now, think of this," Sazed pointed to the base of the tree, "as when the Lord Ruler took Preservation's powers and changed the world in his attempt to save humanity." The table expanded somehow to accommodate for the room the growing tree took.
"This," Sazed said, pointing to where the tree split into two main branches, "is where the Lord Ruler is killed. On this side," he put his hand on the left, "Vin succeeds and everything progresses as you remember. On this side, though," he pointed to the right branch, "Vin doesn't succeed and the Lord Ruler continues to reign. He will go to the Well of Ascension and take the power for himself again. He will renew Ruin's prison and life will continue largely as it has for the last thousand years – although he will likely change the planet to be more accommodating. Or, well, he will try."
"But... that didn't happen," Elend said slowly, not really liking where this seemed to be going.
Sazed nodded. "It didn't, because your memories come from this side of the tree of time," he said, patting the branch that was now as large as his arm. It grew green leaves as well, Elend noted, but pushed that thought out of his mind. Now wasn't the time.
"So... you're saying that somewhere out there in some time, the Lord Ruler survived?"
"Yes," Sazed nodded again. Then he lifted from the ground, floating to another split in of the branch. "And this is where you took the crown. On this hand," he patted the leftmost one again, "you took it and created the same government you tried to implement in your memories, while on this hand, you decided to be a little more traditional," he patted the right branch.
Elend frowned. "There are more branches on that one."
The god shrugged. "This decision would given you more options. That doesn't necessarily make it the right one... or the wrong one."
The scholar conceded with a nod of his head and gestured for Sazed to continue his explanation.
"Each split into new branches represents a choice. Sometimes there are only two choices, sometimes," he pointed to a branch that split into four separate ones, "there are more. Either way, each choice represents a new timeline. But when Vin sent you back," Sazed floated back down to the ground, the tree now large and sprawling over their heads, "she essentially created an entirely new branch."
With a wave of his hand, a new branch sprouted just below the first V shape, snaking out and shaping itself.
"I come into play up there," Sazed said as he pointed to the top of the tree. "There are branches that I watch over. Any decisions made there in those timelines fall under my jurisdiction. But what Vin did, by sending you back here falls beyond that."
"Then how are you even here?"
Sazed smiled. "Because your future memories come from the world where I was created, I have a link to you, but it is difficult for me to be here. I had to, essentially, jump branches and may have had to metaphorically 'step' on a couple of other branches to get here. I have yet to know if any interference on my part, witting or unwitting, will make a difference in the timelines, but you see, this is the timeline where I make the effort to come," he patted a branch that rose and spread, popping out leaves. "And this is the one where I didn't."
The branch was small, with few splits and they all seemed to taper off quickly. Elend gulped. If he was reading the analogy correctly, his presence alone could have destroyed the world – done Ruin's job for him. Somehow, he didn't think Vin had meant to do that...
Just as the Lord Ruler hadn't meant to nearly destroy the world by moving it...
Suddenly, it struck Elend as to just how much more powerful and knowledgeable Sazed and Ruin and the Lord Ruler were. It was... humbling and rather terrifying in all truth.
He swallowed. Sazed just smiled warmly at him.
"Humans have the potential to reach the level I stand in now some day. Which may be part of the reason why Ruin wanted to destroy them."
"But... there's so much we don't know..."
Sazed shrugged. "It won't be for a while yet, but it is still possible."
And that, more than anything else, seemed to just break Elend's thought process. So he decided to shake that off – along with the fact that Sazed seemed able to read his mind – and focused back on the tree that had apparently reached its full size, as it had stopped growing.
"So, what about your visit saves the world, then?"
Sazed floated over the table and then down to sit in a chair next to Elend. "I have a couple of things to tell you: First, Ruin. If you make it to the Well of Ascension, you will have a choice. On one hand, you may free him and force a confrontation, thus creating the possibility to create another Harmony – like myself. Think of this as a more permanent solution if you succeed."
"That sounds like it has quite a few risks," Elend pointed out. Like what had happened in their world. So many people had been killed...
Sazed nodded. "Indeed. Thus, I can understand why you may want to look at the next choice, which will be to let someone take the power and use it as the Lord Ruler did. Someone who is attuned to Preservation."
"And, in a thousand years, we will have another choice just like this one," Elend concluded.
"Yes," Sazed said, looking pleased that Elend had caught on quickly.
"But... if we chose to just take the power – if Vin chose to just take the power..."
"She would remain on the physical plain, as the Lord Ruler did."
"And if she didn't... if she chose to give it up..."
"Ruin would be freed," Sazed reaffirmed.
"And... someone would have to take those powers on again later to destroy Ruin, wouldn't they."
Vin... just like she had in their future.
Sazed's gaze saddened, and he suddenly didn't seem like he was there at all. For several seconds, he stared off into the distance through the rain outside. "Yes."
More silence before the god spoke again, voice quiet and meek.
"I thought I was the precursor to Vin – convinced she was the hero of ages and I was there to prepare the world. It seems that she was the precursor to me, and she had to prepare the world. I... would have preferred for it to have gone the other way, I think."
Elend didn't say, "Me too," aloud, but it was there nonetheless.
"I am... not even sure the original Preservation knew exactly what would happen. Even now, I can guess what will come, but I do not know. I have not seen all possibilities play out. In that way, despite what I know now, I do not feel like a true God, but a paltry copy – a child playing dress up."
He turned to Elend. "There is something more powerful out there. Something bigger than even I, right now, can comprehend." He almost glowed as he said that, gaze taking in more than what a mere mortal could see, Elend was sure of it. He found it unnerving.
Then Sazed blinked and he seemed to remember where he was. He looked back at Elend, smiling kindly.
"I have two more pieces of information to give you. First: You are a misting."
Elend felt his heart stop and his breath freeze in his chest. Then he let it out in a large whoosh. "Of course I would be a misting of one of the lost or useless metals."
The other man just smiled knowingly. "Not so useless as you may assume, I think."
Elend just snorted sardonically. "And the other piece of information?" he asked.
Sazed nodded in acknowledgment before speaking. "Aluminum doesn't work only on people. While Ruin is contained, it will work on him too. Once he is not contained, though..."
The god faded off, but he didn't need to finish.
Elend frowned. "But, he cannot enter our minds anyway. Why is that important?"
"If you are entirely surrounded by aluminum, he cannot hear you," Sazed said. "You will need allies – you will need to tell those you trust the truth, eventually."
Elend blinked. "Are you telling me to make an aluminum room? Before the Well of Ascension?"
Sazed simply shrugged nonchalantly. Then he looked around at the room again and clapped his hands. The tree vanished and the light returned outside the windows, somehow making the scene look fresher and newer than it had.
"I have a connection to you," the taller figure said, "but it is tenuous at best. I do not know if I will be able to speak with you again."
Elend considered him for several seconds before he sighed. "You came all the way here to help me – to help this world that isn't even under your jurisdiction. Why?"
Sazed smiled sadly. "Because we are friends... and you needed it, I think."
That touched Elend, deeply. So he reached over and drew the god – the man – into a hug. He didn't even know why. It wasn't something anyone he knew would do (including himself), but... it seemed right at the moment. As powerful as Sazed was, he'd looked so fragile when he'd spoken. He didn't really feel like a human, even in Elend's arms, but somehow, the house heir thought his friend still needed the human connection and wondered when the last time he could even touch someone was.
Even gods required love and support, he supposed. What a strange concept, but he could accept it.
"Thank you," Elend said as he stepped back. "Sincerely and from the depths of my soul, thank you."
He didn't think he'd ever seen such a real smile on the bald man's face before. "You and Vin will be sorely missed in my worlds. In a way, I will always be a little jealous of Preservation, Ruin and the Lord Ruler, as their world birthed those I hold most dear, even now."
Elend returned the man's expression. "Your worlds will be amazing, Sazed."
"Harmony."
The younger man blinked. "What?"
"That's what I go by, now: Harmony."
Elend snorted. "You'll always be Sazed to me."
And that smile somehow grew larger.
"Farewell, Elend Venture. You have my best wishes and my blessing, whatever good it may do for you."
Elend nodded. "Thank you," he said again.
And then the world began to fade.
"You will remember this," Sazed's voice came to him one final time, "and that is the only gift I can give you without announcing my presence to the gods in this time."
"Then I will use it well," Elend promised.
"I know you will."
And then the world faded away.
xXx
AN: Aaaaand that's it. Sorry.
If you'd like to come yell at me on Discord: discord. gg/2acAymzqku (no spaces)
