Aww you guys are too kind with your reviews. They always make my day. So I appreciate all your reviews.
Fanfiction Trauma
Wow and thanks castle1773 for being my 400th review. I can't believe this; it's so cool.
And LoveHotch-CM, I just read that story you mentioned and I'm mentally scarred now.
Chapter 18: Enter Demily
Will walked over to Kevin and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Easy bud, it's over now."
"Remind me again why we don't just high tail it out of here?" Seaver asked as she eyed the defeated form of Kevin with concern.
"Because," Garcia answered with a sigh. "I believe that under all this pile of bad fanfiction stories there's at least one good one."
"I agree with Garcia." Blake said. "And if Kevin says he's read good ones then that's enough for me to believe that there is at least one good story hidden in this site."
The technical analyst peered up from where he was hunched over. "You really mean that?"
Blake smiled at him. "Why wouldn't I? It isn't like you're some crazy unsub, right?"
That served to cheer the man up. "Yep."
"Is is even worth the risk?" JJ exclaimed.
Rossi shrugged. "We're already neck deep in this pothole, might as well find something valuable to make it not seem like a complete waste of time."
"We should just find another category to check out." Reid suggested.
Morgan shot him a glare. "No way man! I wanna at least read one story where I'm not OOC or in some nasty ass slash story."
"Well since you're so eager Derek why don't you read?" Emily replied.
"You know what? I will." Morgan said before marching over to the laptop. "I'll find a good story Emily, just you wait."
Emily shook her head as he'd just fallen right into her trap.
Reid chuckled. "Nice one."
Henry shot his hand in the air abruptly. "Um?"
"Yeah, what is it?" Reid said as he approached his beloved godson.
"Uncle Spencer do you have candy?"
"Well... I have some yogurt in the fridge would you like one?"
"Yeah yeah!"
Reid turned to Jack. "How about you Jack?"
"Yeah!"
After getting Hotch and JJ's approval he headed for the kitchen, but Morgan's voice halted him.
"Hey kid, fetch me one too."
Reid glared at him but headed to go get one nonetheless.
"Darn," Seaver muttered as he left. "I should've asked him for one." A second later and she darted towards him. "Hey Reid hang on!"
"Hey Derek," Kevin said. "Make sure you don't pick out a story written by the same username as one of the stories we've read before."
"Well I don't have an eidetic memory like pretty boy but I'll try my best." Morgan replied as he continued scanning the stories.
"Guys what genre would you prefer my story to be, adventure or mystery?" Will asked as he jotted notes onto his notepad.
JJ gave him a blank stare. "Don't tell me you were actually serious about that?"
"Dead serious," he assured her. He then turned to Reid and Seaver, whom had returned and we're holding yogurts. "Guys, adventure or mystery?"
Seaver and Reid paused and glanced at each other before replying in unison. "Both."
"Both?" Will repeated before grinning. "Yeah, I like that. You guys are definitely gonna love my story."
Reid tossed a yogurt to Morgan. "Catch."
"Thanks pal." Morgan replied as he caught it.
The genius then handed Jack and Henry one.
"Jack," Hotch scolded. "What do you say to Spencer?"
"Oh Yeah!" Jack said as it sunk in. He swung his feet off the bed and rushed over to embrace Reid. "Thanks Spencer! You're the best."
Henry followed in suit and clamped onto Reid as well. "I love you Uncle Spencer!"
Reid grinned sheepishly and ruffled their heads before smiling. "And I love you guys as well."
"Aww..." Garcia cooed at their adorableness.
Blake chuckled. "You're great with kids Reid."
The doctor blushed and lightly scratched his head. "Oh y-you think so?"
"Okay," Morgan cut in. "Found one!"
"And let the mental torture commence." Rossi grumbled as he headed to his spot.
The Connected Links
By BiggestKevinFan
Everyone's jaw dropped.
"I... have fans?" Kevin murmured in sheer disbelief. "I can't believe it... I have fans." He wiped a tear away. "Awesome! I can't believe there's someone who likes me."
"I like you." Jack said from where he was eating yogurt.
"Me too, me too!" Henry added eager to join in with his friend Jack. "I like you."
Kevin gave them a thumbs up. "Thanks, you kids totally rock."
Summary: Someone in the BAU doesn't like the attention that Derek is giving Jordan Todd.
Morgan raised a brow before turning to the ladies and smirking. "So, who was jealous of the attention I was giving Jordan?"
Everyone shot him a pointed look.
"Get over yourself Derek, none of us were." Emily said dryly.
"Sure you weren't."
Watch as they finally take things into their own hands and make him realize that their the one he belongs with.
"Hmm... this author is using words like 'their' and 'they'," Blake pointed out. "They haven't made any specification on whether it's a woman they're talking about or a man."
"Noooo!" Morgan cried out. "Please don't let it be slash! Why am I always in a slash pairing?! I'm not the only man in the team! Use Hotch or Rossi!"
"I would rather they didn't." Hotch said.
"Likewise." Rossi added.
It was going on again. Ever since Agent Todd entered the team it had been the same. This had been quite the routine now. It all happened when JJ had gone on maternity leave.
"Thank God, yet again I have been spared from appearing in these stories." JJ said.
"So it isn't JJ," Morgan muttered before eying the rest of the ladies of his team. "That leaves one of you."
"You're so certain it's one of us." Seaver replied with a raised brow. "It could be slash again."
"Well, then, you guys better pray it isn't, because if it is I'm gonna be swimming with the fishes."
JJ rolled her eyes at his implication. "Don't you think you're being a bit dramatic?"
He gave her a serious face, which reminded her of Hotch's numerous serious looks. "No."
Those two would always be together. It was getting on her nerves.
"Sweet," Morgan cheered. "There's my confirmation. Now it leaves me back to my previous theory and you guys get to see me live another day."
Why couldn't it be her? God it probably could've been her if she weren't so boring. And maybe if she were a bit more adventurous.
"Someone has low self esteem." Kevin joked.
She watched angrily as Jordan shuffled closer to whisper something in his ear. She was most likely complimenting him. She didn't understand what Jordan had that she didn't. What if it was everything?
"Is anyone else sick of these guessing games that these stories seem to so commonly have?" Garcia said.
Seaver yawned in response. "I'm tired of the sleepiness they induce."
Emily chuckled. "They sure do suck don't they?"
But today that was going to change. No more will she just stand by and let that girl do as she pleases. Derek belonged to her. Just because Derek didn't find her at all pretty or stunning didn't mean she was any less of a person.
Morgan frowned. "Hold the phone."
"What's up?" Kevin asked.
"Since I haven't seen any mention of an OC then that means this story's referring to one of the women on the team."
"Right, and?" Will added.
"Well it irritates me when they state that I don't find the person attractive. I find all of the ladies I work with to be special and unique. And I certainly don't think Jordan is more of a woman than any of you."
The women smiled in flattery and each sent him a heartwarming smile.
But honestly, what did Derek see in her? Emily—
"What?!" Emily shouted, adjacent to her in the chair, Morgan held the biggest smirk.
"Well, well, well what do we have here?" Morgan said with a smug smile. "Prentiss I didn't know you we're jealous of the attention I was giving Jordan."
Emily gritted her teeth. "That's because I wasn't jealous."
"The story sure thinks otherwise." Rossi joked.
just couldn't pinpoint it. If you asked her Jordan was nothing but a horrible agent with horrible tactics. Her ways of getting things done were reckless and stupid. She didn't compare to JJ's level of expertise. She was so incompetent.
"Why am I being written as a jealous high school girl?" Emily growled. "I never once thought that Jordan was a nuisance in any way. She was my friend."
And she looked like she was just thriving off of Emily's dislike towards her.
"Hey Emily." She greeted with a smirk. It was as if she'd noticed that Emily had been witnessing her encounter with Derek.
"Oh hey," Emily quickly replied before walking over to her desk. She watched as Jordan entered her office (JJ's office) sluttily—
"Is that even a word?" Kevin asked. "How in the world do you even enter an office 'sluttily'?"
"Granted I didn't know who she was but I'm sure she is nothing like how the story is depicting her." Blake said.
"Yeah I feel the same way." Seaver added. The young agent didn't have a clue who they were talking about in the story; but even she knew that she didn't have to meet Jordan to know she wasn't how they we're portraying her.
and scowled in disgust.
"What's up with you?" Derek said.
"Nothing." She replied icily.
"Let me guess... you just walked in on someone getting nasty in the bathroom."
"If you ever walk in on someone doing that please inform me immediately." Hotch said with a serious tone. "I will not tolerate any crude or obscene behavior such as that. We work in an environment of rules and justice not the playboy mansion."
Although it wasn't his intention at all the group broke out into laughter.
"Dude you made a joke!" Morgan said.
"I wasn't joking."
"More like in front of me..." she muttered before facing him. "So what's up with you and Jordan?"
He cringed instantly. "Nothing! That girl is nuts and clingy as hell. You know at first I thought she was hot but her personality is a major turn off."
"Her personality seemed fine to me." Reid said.
Garcia scowled in disgust. "Do ANY of these authors know anything about us, or did they just watch one episode of our supposed show and go 'hey, this is awesome; Imma write a horrible OOC story to satisfy my needs'?"
"Something tells me it's the latter." Blake replied.
"Really?"
Totally. I mean just look at her." Derek replied before nodding in her direction.
And it honestly didn't surprise her that Jordan was already whoring herself out to some guy.
"She's not here, right?" Reid murmured as he frantically scanned his cramped room. "I mean, she didn't arrive at one point, right? Right?"
"Hurry, finish before she randomly appears!" Kevin said.
Emily laughed as poor Anderson tried running away from her. "Wow what was I thinking?"
The day had gone more smoothly and Emily had no clue it was about to get a thousand times better. When she reached the parking lot she caught Derek approaching her.
"Hey, glad you're still here." He said.
"Why what's up?" Emily asked trying her best to contain her butterflies.
"Oh please," Emily grumbled. "I'm not some elementary schoolgirl with a crush."
Suddenly Jack and Henry approached Emily, wearing what she profiled as sinister grins. They were peering bashfully up at her.
"What is it guys?" She humored them anyway.
Jack glanced at Henry excitedly before facing her and smiling. "Are you and Derek married in real life?"
Emily's jaw dropped, more surprised by his lack of beating around the bush than the question itself. Oh yeah, he was definitely Hotch's son.
The laughter that followed the question though, brought her out of her thoughts.
"Yes Jack, we are married." Morgan joked only to be jabbed in the ribs.
"Well cause I want to tell you something and it can't wait anymore."
His declaration made her blush.
This line further heightened the two young boys' excitement.
"Derek and Emily sitting in a tree," Jack sang.
"K-I-S-S..." Henry stopped mid-sentence having no clue how the rest of the word was spelled.
Fortunately for him and unfortunately for Emily Jack knew.
"I-N-G," he finished and soon picked up where his partner Henry had left off.
The others we're getting quite a laugh out of the display, even the usually uptight unit chief was smiling.
"What is it Derek?"
"I didn't get to tell you what I really wanted to tell you; as in the real reason why I'd never get involved with Jordan."
"And that reason would be?"
"Because... you're the one I like."
Seaver chuckled as the boys furthered teased Emily. "I swear Jack and Henry must be the most adorable kids I've ever seen."
"I know right," Garcia agreed as she pulled both boys into a hug.
She gasped lightly. "Wow... I've been crazy about you since the first time we met."
That was all it took for Derek to lean in and press his lips to her.
And now Emily felt like a kid back in elementary school as the children began making kissing noises. It also didn't help that Morgan was making his own mock kissing gestures.
"I can't wait to rub this in Jordan's face tomorrow." She joked.
"Oh definitely, we're most certainly gonna show her that I'm not interested."
And so the next day they did. As everyone had expected Jordan came to terms with it quickly and moved on to the next poor guy.
Fin.
"So was anyone else glad for their lack of appearance?" Reid asked.
Everyone but Morgan and Emily raised their hands.
"Aah good, thought it was just me."
"That wasn't a completely horrible story you know," Morgan said. "Though, I could do without all the hate on Jordan."
"Why don't you search for another one since you're having such a good time?" Reid suggested.
"Nice try kid, but I'm done with risking my mental stability. It's someone else's turn now."
The rest sighed at the prospect of having to read again.
Author's Notes
Derek and Emily *nods head* oh yeah, I definitely support it.
Okay guys, announcement time!
I just want to say that if you have any story requests then feel free in letting them out. I'll make your request come true and use my magic to turn it into a shitty plot for our loveable cast to read.
