Holy moley I got a bunch of requests. I'd like to thank all of you who've read and reviewed my story. This topic was requested by many and it's quite popular in the fandom. Sorry for the lateness I've just been having a shitty weekend.

Fanfiction Trauma


Chapter 19: De-aged Reid

Garcia sighed. "So now what?"

"Since Derek chickened out then one of us has to read." Will replied.

"Whoa don't even go there man!" Morgan countered with crossed arms. "You forget that I'm a profiler so any tricks you try to make me read again won't work."

"You do realize that the reason you read this time around was because Emily pulled a fast one on ya, right?"

"What?!" Morgan shouted in disbelief. "That does it Emily, I want a divorce."

Emily rolled her eyes. "Would you give it a rest?"

"We could vote on it again." Kevin suggested.

Morgan was quick to reject the idea. "No way! Last time I was unanimously nominated for reading."

"Then what do you suggest?" Will said.

"I suggest that you read."

"Like hell I read already, twice."

"And I've read three times, what's your point?"

"Enough you two, can't you see we have a situation here?" Seaver cut in.

"Ashley's right." Hotch stated. "We clearly aren't going to get a volunteer, to which I don't blame anyone, but someone has to read."

"I know!" Kevin jumped in before snickering at what he was about to suggest. "Not it!"

The room stood silent and glances were exchanged amongst one another before it finally sunk in.

"Not it!" Multiple shouts echoed the room.

The only one who hadn't taken the hint was a poor clueless Reid. "What, I don't get it? Were we supposed to repeat that? Wait... I demand a do-over."

"Tough turkey kid." Morgan replied as he beckoned the chair. "It's your turn to read."

"This is so unfair." He mumbled to himself before dragging his feet to the chair.

"I'll be right by your side Reid." Garcia assured him. "Just like when we started this whole thing."

And it was true. Garcia and Reid had been here since the very beginning.

Reid smiled. "Thanks."

"So um... I hate to be a bother but," Seaver started with a slight blush. "Is anyone else hungry?"

"Now that you mention it... I'm a bit hungry." Emily said. "I haven't eaten squat."

"And we have been here for hours now." Blake exclaimed.

"Totally, I wouldn't mind some food." Kevin added.

"Yeah me too," JJ said as she shot Morgan a glare. "Thanks to a certain someone I skipped my entire day."

"Now if you recall JJ I did tell you that if you were disappointed in any way then Reid would spend his entire life making it up to you."

"I heard that!" Reid retorted while he scanned the stories.

"Hey Spencer, you mind if we order some grub?" Kevin asked.

"Not at all. Go ahead."

"I'll order guys," Morgan said. "What do you want to eat?"

"I want Chinese." Will replied.

"Are you crazy Will? With the amount of people here plus the specific orders I'll be on the phone with the guy for hours."

"How about a pizza?" Hotch chimed in.

"Good thinking Hotch. Are we all in agreement?" Seeing no protests he took it as his answer. "Good, I'm gonna go order now."

"Hey, tell them to add sausages on one of the orders." Garcia said before he exited the room.

"Sure thing babygirl!"

"Alright everyone, I found one." Reid said before pausing. "Should we wait for Morgan?"

"He'll thank us later." Rossi replied.

Reversing Time

"Sounds interesting..." Blake murmured before shaking her head. "Oh right, it's fanfiction."

By SSAKileyHotchner

"Hey boss man it looks like you have a fangirl." Garcia joked.

"I'm not interested." Hotch calmly said.

Summary: The BAU team is in for a major surprise when a case in Wyoming leads to one of their agents getting their life altered. Surprising consequences are in stored for Reid.

"Aaahh!"

"And we are back to dodging the yelling." Rossi said.

"Sorry guys, I wish I could control it."

Rossi smiled. "Don't worry Reid; you know not one of us blames you."

"I hope your symptoms don't worsen though." Blake said as she eyed Reid with concern.

"You and me both."

"So we have some sick dude who experiments on his victims?" Derek said.

The team was currently in the conference room while Penelope briefed them.

"The markings on their bodies indicate uses of syringes." JJ added.

"Darn it, I was looking forward to not being in this one as well."

"Guess your luck has officially run out." Rossi chuckled.

"I'm back guys, what I miss?" Morgan said before laughing. "Just kidding guys I don't think I could care any less. Anyways, pizza guy says he'll be here in about thirty minutes."

"Awww!" They groaned.

"Wheels up in twenty."

The team quickly arrived in Wyoming with the help of the jet.

(An - Okay everyone since I don't want to go through the boring process of motives and profiles etc... I'll just be cutting to the part where they find the guy.)

"Wow, seriously?" Garcia exclaimed with a frown. "Way to suck me into your story."

"Well that's a fun way in getting my attention." Seaver added dryly. "I definitely want to read now."

"What kind of an author cuts their story like that?" Blake said.

"Not a good one." Rossi answered.

When they arrived at his house Hotch gave the order to split up. "Rossi and Prentiss take the back, JJ and I will take the back, you two go and check his garage. Whesker is here somewhere."

"Isn't Whesker that guy from the zombie movie?" Emily asked.

"Yeah he's from the Resident Evil franchise." Kevin answered

Derek and Spencer—

"Aaahh!"

rushed inside the garage to check it out. They had no idea that the garage was set to blow up. In seconds an explosion tore through the area. The rest of the team rushed towards the them.

"Guys!" Rossi shouted.

Derek came out holding a bundle wrapped in his friend's clothes.

"Oh no they vaporized Reid!" Garcia said.

"The guy is a scientist after all, so it could be." Rossi added. "Although no such thing exists."

"Where is he?" JJ said.

Derek pulled the clothes away to reveal a very young boy.

"So... were there hostages?" Seaver asked. "I thought for sure that house would be empty."

"This is him." He replied.

"Huh?" The entire group said.

"Iths me Spenzer."

Due to the misspelling of his name Reid hadn't yelled, but that didn't mean he wasn't freaked out. "What? How am I a baby?"

"Wait, all I got is that they entered the garage and it exploded." Emily said. "Was it the explosion that did it?"

"If that was the case then shouldn't Morgan have shrunk in age as well?" Blake added.

Hotch placed his hand over his face in exasperation. "How an explosion leads to a man shrinking in age is beyond me."

"I'm sure the story has an explanation." Kevin said only to receive blank looks. "Or not."

"How did this happen?" Hotch shouted.

"I don't know. One minute we're checking out the garage and the next we hear a ticking, then we're sent flying." Derek said as he clutched the young genius. "Next thing I know he's like this."

"We have to get him to a hospital." Emily said.

"Hospital?" Morgan repeated with a laugh. "I'd take him to a daycare or a nanny."

"Haha very funny." Reid replied.

"No. I shall take care of him." Hotch said. "I'll watch over him at my house."

"Why would it be me who takes care of him?" Hotch said in disbelief. "It's hard enough trying to find time for Jack; and if I could barely make time for my son then how am I possibly going to make time for Reid?"

"Well, then the same pretty much goes for all of us." Blake added. "Hence why majority of us are children-less."

"It'd make more sense for Garcia to watch over Reid." Seaver exclaimed before shaking her head and sighing. "Wait, why are we even discussing this? This is never going to happen."

"Thank goodness." Morgan said. "Because I'd die before I'd ever change Reid's diapers." He cringed at the statement. "Seriously, I'll feel like a damn pedophile."

"And I'd feel very violated." Reid replied.

"He's so cute though," Emily exclaimed as she ruffled his hair. "I might just take him off your hands and take him with me."

"If my friend were to ever shrink in age, which I remind you doesn't happen every day, believe me that I will not find it adorable in any way." Emily stated. "I'd find it extremely weird and be scared crapless."

"Tell me about it." JJ agreed.

"We have to check the area; maybe Whesker has a cure somewhere." Rossi said.

"You guys check and I'll get him to the hotel." Hotch replied.

(One month later)

"Really? A time skip?" Garcia said. "No, go right ahead it isn't like there aren't enough plot holes in your junk story."

"This is exactly why I only read Vonnegut books." Emily exclaimed.

"Hey I said the exact same thing." Morgan replied and the two shared a high five.

"It's time to eat!" Hotch shouted and in seconds a small four year old appeared. He'd become accustomed to this. He was glad Jessica was taking care of Jack because he couldn't raise two kids.

Hotch could actually feel the vein throbbing in his head. "This is just beyond stupid."

"Can anyone explain why he hasn't been taken to a hospital or a freaking super scientist?" Kevin wondered aloud. "He could have some serious side effects or it could be contagious."

"I am so glad we live in reality." Rossi groaned.

"This is like that fountain of youth thing I use to read about when I was a kid." Seaver said.

"You know there really isn't any quantifiable proof that the fountain of youth exists, although tales of such a fountain have been recounted across the world for thousands of years." Reid stated and continued on to explain the theories to it.

And soon everyone began tuning him out

"I'm here!"

Hotch chuckled at the boy. "Time for school Spencer."

Had Reid not paused to rant about Spanish explorer Juan Ponce de León and his attempt to search for the fountain of youth, and had noticed he'd just read his name he'd of shouted.

"Is he really being taken into school?" Will asked. "There's no point and it makes no sense."

"They never have a point." Blake answered before chuckling at how Reid had somehow tied his rant to the number 4 and how it couldn't possibly be the ultimate answer since it made no logical sense.

Things had turned like this. They had never found the cure and we're still searching for Whesker. Everyone had grown accustomed to this life and Hotch was feeling like a father all over again.

"I'm already a father." Hotch growled as he tried futilely to maintain his spite.

Will yawned at how terribly boring the story was. He walked over to the bed where Henry and Jack were playing and crashed onto the unoccupied side of it. "Guys do me a favor and let me know when it's done."

Henry immediately climbed onto his dad. "Hey Jack, dad's entewing' our castle!"

"Intruder!" Jack shouted playfully before poking Will's cheek with his hand. "Off with his head!"

Will laughed and decided that humoring the young boys was infinitely better than hearing the boring story.

Rumors had been spreading that the man was now in Wisconsin so the team we're doing their best to keep up with him, but it was difficult to do so when they got cases. Due to his age now, their resident genius had to give in his badge and gun and permanently stay with Hotch until they found Whesker.

At this point everyone had begun tuning out the story.

Emily had gotten into a lively conversation with JJ about her days in London. Rossi began entertaining Seaver about a new book he was thinking of publishing while Blake half listened and half wondered if it had been thirty minutes yet.

Morgan leaned his back lazily against Blake's and begun dozing off. Garcia and Kevin found better entertainment in Will playing with the boys.

Hotch merely closed his eyes.

But he had to admit that living with his boss had its perks. Expect he could do without the spanks to his rear.

"Jesus Christ," Emily gasped upon hearing that line. "What is wrong with these authors?"

"Aahh!" Morgan groaned. "This is like that horrible spanking story we read!"

"I had all but forgotten that..." Rossi grumbled as he buried his face in his hands. "Goodness the mental images will be the death of me."

"Oh curse my eidetic memory," Reid sighed sadly. "These horrible experiences will follow me for a long time."

"Garcia," Hotch called. "When we finally find a good story you are to shut down this site immediately afterwards; I never want to see it again."

"It'll be my pleasure sir."

"No way!" Kevin protested. "Just because this section sucks doesn't mean the ones I read suck too."

"Fine," Hotch tried again. "Garcia once we find a good story you are to shut down only this section of this website."

"It'll still be my pleasure sir."

"I have to go to work now." Hotch said. "I'll drive you to school and have the nanny pick you up."

Despite being half-asleep on Blake's back Morgan chuckled at the mention of a nanny.

"Okay." He replied excitedly. Inwardly he was glad to be going to school as there was a girl in his pre K that he had a huge crush on.

"That's gross." Kevin said.

Reid felt bile fill up his throat. "I may be a child but I'm still a man in the inside; attraction towards a little girl would be impossible and yes, also very gross."

JJ approached Hotch at work. "I think we have a lead."

"Where?"

"Whesker has been spotted in Wisconsin, it's official now."

"Get the team and prepare the jet. We're going Wisconsin."

"Wouldn't it be great if we could prepare the jet for our own personal use whenever we wanted," Rossi joked.

An - That's it for chapter one guys. If you review Hotch will come to your house and talk nasty to you ;)

Much to Hotch's displeasure the room exploded with laughter.

"Are we sure this isn't the same author that wrote the whump story?" Hotch asked as he recalled the similar obscene line used in that story.

Reid hopped off the chair with a genuine smile etched in his face. "Well that was my turn."

And the part everyone dreaded was back again.


Author's Notes

I have never read a de-aged story about Reid so I pretty much improvised in this chapter. Anyway, bring in those requests my friends.