"It's Griblig day today and it's dragging. Mallymkun, the dormouse, was busy so she didn't stop by for tea. I like being by myself sometimes. It always gave me some time to think. Oh dear, my mind wondered back to the day I met Alice.
Alice, such a sweet girl; a girl who was lost, stumbled upon our mad tea party. It's been far too long since she's been away, and the madness; oh, the madness, it took me over! I haven't been the same since she left. I don't understand why. What did this girl mean to me?
I looked over at Thackery, the March Hare, and he was fast asleep. I felt better knowing he was asleep so that he wouldn't catch me in deep thought. I was spinning my tea cup when Mallymkun scurried up to us and leapt onto the table. Thackery was still asleep and didn't hear her approach.
She, out of breath, started to explain why, "Tarrant…Nivens returned… and …he said… he found Alice. Well…when she walked into the garden… I wasn't convinced."
I interrupted her, "Alice is here in Underland? Why aren't you convinced? Does she not look like Alice?"
Mallymkun continued and imitated Alice's actions, "We showed Alice the Oraculum and she backed away as if she was frightened by what she did to the Jabberwocky. She said she wasn't the slaying type. Well, the Bandersnatch came and everyone ran like mad. Alice just stood there and repeated to herself, 'he can't hurt me…he can't hurt me."
Thackery finally woke up and joined me in laughing with delight at the way Mally performed her imitations of Alice.
She continued, "He was about to do her in. So I had to go in there and pop out his eye. I think I'll keep it with me for good luck."
When she showed us the eye, it smelled horrific and looked atrocious. I wrinkled my nose and closed my eyes. Thackery placed an empty tea cup to his nose to block out the smell.
I told her, "Put it away, Mally. It's frumious!"
She obligingly tucked the eye in a pocket. Then, her ears perked up as if she suddenly heard something. Thackery and I turned in the direction she was looking and saw the Chesire Cat. Behind him was a blonde-haired girl in a periwinkle short-sleeved dress.
Mallymkun placed her paws on her hips and sarcastically stated, "Well, look what the cat dragged in."
I added my two bits in, "The very Alice in question."
Thackery was being polite at the moment and asked, "Join us for tea? Are you free for tea? Tea, anyone?"
Chessur rolled his eyes at us and replied, "I'm not staying." He disappeared.
I shook my head at him and Alice commented, "He's always doing that."
Mallymkun stated the obvious, "Don't we know it."
I chuckled and added in, "Chessur lives to please himself."
Thackery skipped in with a full teapot and started singing, "Only himself, always himself. Just him, his own self."
Chessur reappeared in one of the chairs and held out an empty tea cup, apparently intending to take up Thackery on his invitation. "Fine, a cup of tea then."
I rolled up my eyes and turned to Alice. Oh dear, those blue eyes; how they looked like the sky on a clear Spring day! I caught myself and pulled out a chair for her. After all, I was a gentleman and she a lady.
"Have a seat," I said to her, gesturing for her to make herself comfortable. All too soon, however, we reverted to our typical tea party habits.
"There's no room," Mallymkun rudely told Alice.
Alice fired back, "There's plenty of room."
Alice sat down and I pushed the chair in. Thackery screamed and scared the living daylights out of me.
"Not there! Can't you see the dishes are dirty? And there's no time to wash them! We're already late for tea! Move down! Move down!" Thackery yelled at us and we all moved down a chair.
Thackery poured tea for us. I pulled out a new chair for Alice, again being a proper gentleman. My _mathair_ had taught me well. As she sat down, I couldn't help but examine her from head to toe. Could this be the same Little Alice from her first visit to Underland? She didn't look the same. I decided to say something about it. After all, someone has to say something!
I bluntly told her, "You don't look anything like yourself."
She looked up at me and there seemed to be a flicker of recognition in her eyes. "Have we met?"
I smiled at her. She _**was **_the same Alice from all those years ago! I was absolutely certain of it.
Chessur sipped his tea and placed his cup in its saucer. "Well, now that I've brought Alice to you, you can't say that I've done nothing for the Cause."
I couldn't believe he had just said that. Oh, how he could make my blood boil! I could feel my eyes change color.
I sarcastically retorted, "Yes, thank you for the heroic effort. We'll take the rest of the revolution from here."
Chessur, who always denounced any interest in politics, then said something that really got my blood up. "You'll pardon me if I don't give a scuddler's gut who wears the crown. The Red Queen has never bothered me."
I slammed my fist down on the table and my eyes were probably yellow-orange with fury. "No matter that she's enslaved half the population?" I bellowed.
"I don't know any of them personally," he replied blandly. Oh, he was really testing my patience!
My eyes must have changed to another color, probably orange. "No matter that she stole the crown from her own sister?" I fired back.
Then he pushed me to my limit. "The White Queen should have put up a better fight."
My eyes were probably red with rage and I stood up quickly when I yelled, "No matter the Red Queen rules with fear, terror, and torture!"
I suddenly feared that Alice might be frightened of my changing eyes, but it seemed that I was wrong. She was worried about me, I supposed, and sipped her tea and continued to watch as Chessur and I argued.
Chessur gave in, "I fail to see what any of that has to do with me."
Thackery retaliated, "He failed! He must be punished!" He turned to me and like a child asked me, "Shall we butter his ears?"
He picked up a butter knife and headed toward the cat.
I placed my hand on his arm and spoke to him in Outlandish. "Naught fer usal, Thackery. Chessur's being slurvish..."
Chessur nearly choked on his tea. "Slurvish?!" he spat, insulted.
I calmly sat down, sipped some tea, and merely stated the truth. "You are, Chessur. You always have been. You'll never change."
Then he said something that almost made me spit out my tea. "And you're always so angry, Tarrant. I remember when you used to enjoy life. You used to do the best Futterwacken in all of Witzend."
I smiled wanly at him and noticed that Alice was interested in knowing what the Futterwacken was. The expression she wore touched me like no other woman's ever has. Of course Queen Mirana has quirky expressions, but the one Alice was wearing was very becoming. Then I remembered that Chessur had spoken to me.
After taking a sip of my tea, I placed my cup down and made an agreement with him, "On the Frabjous day, when the White Queen wears the crown again. On that day, I'll Futterwacken," and I leaned back in my green winged back chair.
That evaporating feline and I glared at each other like feuding brothers even though I have no brothers who are still alive. Chessur finished his tea and set down the empty cup.
Chessur bowed to Alice. "Take care of that arm, Alice," he said. He disappeared.
Alice drank some tea, set her cup down, and turned toward us. "I want you to know, right now, that I'm not slaying anything!"
Mallymkun giggled and spoke her mind, "As if you could."
Alice looked as if she was getting annoyed and retaliated, "There must be another way for
me to get back to where I came from."
Poor Alice, I could tell all of this was overwhelming her; however, there was no other way out and I guess it was up to me to tell her.
"There is no other way. You have to slay the Jabberwocky with the Vorpal Sword at Brillig on the Frabjous Day," I told her after finishing my tea and setting down my cup.
Alice stood up and shouted, "I'm not that Alice!"
Thackery shouted at us, "RED KNIGHTS!"
I immediately checked my pockets for the potion. I finally found it in my right coat pocket and pulled off the top.
I turned to Alice. "Drink this," I told her.
Alice looked at me angrily. "No!"
I looked at Thackery and saw the panic in his eyes. We grabbed Alice by her arms and put her on the table. We forced her to drink the potion. I hadn't wanted to do that to her, but since she wouldn't drink it on her own, she left us with no other choice. I hoped she would forgive me later. When she had shrunk down to about three inches, I gently picked her up and placed her in the empty tea pot, stuffing her dress in after her.
She looked up at me and the nicest thing I could tell her was, "Watch your head," then placed the lid on top the teapot.
I turned to Mallymkun, "Gallymoggers," and I did a handstand on my chair.
Thackery laid down on the tables and Mallymkun climbed into a soup tureen. Bayard, the Bloodhound, ran in with his nose to the ground with Stayne, the Knave of hearts, and the Red Knights.
I decided to be polite. "Greetings, gentlemen."
Stayne, walking tall and proud, snickered, "Well, if it's not my favorite trio of lunatics."
Thackery picked up a teapot, thank goodness it wasn't the one with Alice in it, yelled, "You are late for tea," and threw it at him.
Stayne neatly ducked and the tea pot flew over his head and smashed somewhere behind him. I released my handstand and sat on my chair.
Why did I ask this, I still don't have an answer for, "How fares the Red Queen? Or is it White? Who is sitting on the throne these days?"
I couldn't stand this fellow. I bet that eye patch was fake. I wouldn't mind making it a permanent fixture on that face of his. My opinion, he's a bottom kisser. What made my heart sink was who he told me he was looking for.
"We're looking for the girl called Alice." I tried to pretend that I had no idea of whom he was speaking, but sometimes my expressions are all too easily read. I did my best to assume an air of seriousness and hoped that I didn't look foolish.
Bayard sniffed around the table and Mallymkun kept one eye on him even though it looked as if she was sleeping. Stayne wanted to wrap up his visit. I could tell we were making him uneasy.
Thackery, being his funny self, told him, "Speaking of the Queen, here's a song I sang at her concert; Twinkle, twinkle little bat! How I wonder where you're at!"
When Thackery said that, Stayne reached out and seized him by the throat, effectively cutting off the song. I reached for my sword, and then thought better of it. It was best to not start a fight before the Frabjous Day.
Stayne, having lost his patience with us, raised his voice, "The Alice! Have you seen her?"
I decided to play with him, "Before we answer that, you'll have to answer a riddle. Why is a raven like a writing desk? Oh my, that's a good one. Can you answer that?"
One of the Red Knights hit me with his weapon and I fell to the ground. _Gonadh_, I was knocked out my favorite chair. Stayne threw Thackery aside and walked up to where I was.
He asked me the question again stressing each word, "Have you seen her?"
Since I enjoyed playing with him, I decided to do it again after standing up, "Have you guessed the riddle?"
I'll be darned if a Red Knight didn't knock me down again! I felt my madness try to gain control of me, but to shake it off, I laughed madly. Thackery joined me and we both cackled insanely.
Mallymkun woke up and sleepily stated, "Thank you, just what I needed," then fell back to sleep.
Stayne really got frustrated and shouted, "If you are hiding an enemy of the Queen, you'll lose your heads."
Thackery corrected him. "Already lost them! Sing all together now!"
Thackery, Mallymkun, and I sang as loud as we could and on cue believe it or not, "Up above the world you fly, like a tea tray in the sky."
That bloody Red Knight struck me again, Stayne choked Thackery again, and Mally got her head dunked into a cup of tea by yet another Red Knight. Stayne was furious, let me tell you, but we were having so much fun! We still sang even though we were struck, choked, and being dunked in tea.
The three of us continued to sing, "Twinkle, Twinkle, Twinkle!"
I realized that we had pushed them past mere anger, but I didn't care. I had fun. Suddenly, Bayard reared up onto the tables and sniffed the tea pots. Oh dear, he had caught Alice's scent! I had to do something or we would get caught. He sniffed at Alice's pot.
I whispered to him, "Downal wyth Bluddy Behg Hid."
He looked at me and I gave a sharp glance to the teapot Alice was in. He understood and pretended to find a new trail. He bayed and ran out the gate.
Stayne ordered the knights, "Follow him."
The Red Knights dropped Mallymkun and Thackery then ran after the Bloodhound. Stayne stared at us and lingered a little while. I thought he caught what I did to the Bloodhound. I almost laughed at what he told us.
"You're all mad," and he turned away to follow the knights.
When they left, I ran up to the teapot with Alice in it and took off the lid.
I told her, "You're safe now. The Bloodhound will lead them away."
I helped her out the teapot and she noticed that I was bleeding. I wiped the blood away; Mallymkun spat out tea, Thackery rubbed his neck, and coughed. I looked down at Alice, and her expression said it all; guilt. It was not her fault, but ours. We wanted to keep her safe so she could slay the Jabberwocky, and the White Queen will have the throne again.
Alice, still feeling guilty, said wistfully, "I wish I could help you, but I'm not who you think I am."
I picked her up in my hand, and looked into her eyes, "You'll need to speak to Absolem. He'll know who you are."
There was hope in her eyes, and then she cried out, "But can he tell me how to get home?"
Gallymoggers, there's that sinking feeling again. What can this mean? It's a good thing Thackery said something so I could clear my mind from this feeling.
"He's wise, he's absolute, he's Absolem," Thackery said, pretending to be a court announcer.
I took off my hat, and placed it on the table next to Alice. I could see that she was wondering what I was doing. She looked at me, and smiled. It was the most beautiful smile I had ever seen! Oh dear, my mind was off wandering again.
"Your carriage awaits, mademoiselle," I, being a gentleman, acted like a footman.
She looked at me with suspicion, "You mean… the hat?"
I reassured her, "Anyone can travel by horse or rail. But only the best people travel by hat."
She trusted me, the delightfully silly girl, and climbed on. She sat on the brim, and held on tightly as I placed it back on my head. I turned, and we bid Thackery and Mally fairfarren. I walked toward the Tulgey Woods. We travelled in silence for some time before Alice decided to break the silence.
"Your name is Tarrant?"
"Hightopp. I was a hatter by trade in the White Queen's court until the Horunvendush Day."
"What happened on that day?"
She had to ask that question. The day everything was taken away from me, and the crown was taken away from the White Queen. She asked so I swallowed hard, and told her everything.
"White fell to Red. It was here in Tulgey Wood. The mood was festive. The Queen was very confident in her Champion. But when the Jabberwocky showed up, fear overcame him, and he dropped the Vorpal sword. The Champion began to run off but the Jabberwocky picked him up with his horns, and dropped him to his death. Fire was blazing everywhere, many people burned to death, houses burned, those who were still alive were forced into slavery by the Red Queen. My family burned in the fire. It was then that the madness started to take over. However, I had to get the White Queen to safety. I grabbed the reins of her horse, and we fled to safety. I missed the rest of it. The Red Knights captured the sword, and the Jabberwocky finished the job of burning everything in sight. The massacre was so terrible; Thackery went mad from the sight of it. On that day, I swore I would not stop until the Red Queen falls."
Poor Alice was quiet. I didn't know if she was deeply moved by what happened or she was saddened. Finally she spoke to me.
"And the White Queen?"
I answered her, "She's in exile in Marmoreal waiting for her champion to kill the Jabberwocky, and return her crown. In the meantime, Thackery, Mallymkun, and others like us work secretly for her cause."
We entered a clearing, and I suddenly realized where we were; Iplam. The once fertile fields were now a scorched wasteland. I was relieved that Alice didn't question me or speak about it because I don't know how I would have responded. We passed through the deserted village and out onto another scorched field. It was then that I saw a storm approaching. I ducked under a large tree with wide branches.
Of course Alice questioned, "Why are we stopping?"
I replied, "Red storm is coming."
After I said that, red hail stones fell from the sky. I could tell she was panicking because my hat brim was bouncing. I sat down, took off my hat, and got her to come into my hand. I put my hat back on and put Alice on my knee.
"It won't last long," I reassured her by smiling at her, and that got her to calm down.
She looked up at me, and her expression almost sent me into hysterical laughter; but I was able to keep my laughter to myself. She must have been trying to figure out why I was so familiar to her because she kept studying me from head to toe. Suddenly, she remembered.
She confirmed, "I know why you're so familiar to me. You're in my dream. I've had the same dream all my life. There's an egg man on a wall, you in your hat, and a blue caterpillar."
I smiled because she was beginning to remember. But why was she calling her memories a dream? I had to find out. She had to realize that all of this wasn't a dream.
"Blue caterpillar... Did you ever think that this 'dream' was trying to tell you something?" I asked her, but only after I had satisfied my longing to admire her.
Oh dear, my heart was the voice that has been nagging me all these years! Alice was more to me than a mere acquaintance, but...what? Then I saw that she was speaking.
Alice shrugged, "I don't know what it could be."
I sighed sadly, but then perked up almost at once. "Perhaps it's something you already know!"
Alice nodded and said, "Possibly. My father used to say…dreams are the way we whisper into our ears."
What a clever man her father was! I knew that even though I had never met him.
I complimented, "An excellent way of putting it. Your father is saganistute!"
She corrected me, "Was saganistute…and that better be a compliment."
I chuckled and answered her, "It means a wise man of poetry and vision."
She smiled at me, and I returned the smile. We just sat in silence for a while waiting for this hail to stop. As it hailed, I would glance at her every now and then. I caught her looking at me a few times, and we both blushed when we caught each other looking. My heart was pounding, and it was a wonder she didn't hear it. It was that moment when we caught each other again that I realized; I'm in love with Alice. The hail stopped, and I couldn't wait to bring her to Absolem so he could get her to realize that this was not a dream, but reality. I held out my hand to her.
"Shall we continue on our way to see Absolem?" I was being a perfect gentleman to her, and she willingly climbed onto my palm.
I placed her back on my hat, stood up, and continued walking across the scorched field where the Jabberwocky burned everything. Finally, it seemed like forever I walked. We reached the mushroom fields. I stopped, bent down, and took off my hat. I placed my hat down and she got off.
"You're on your own from here," I told her remembering Absolem's temper.
Alice looked at me sadly. "You're not coming with me?"
I smiled, "Absolem can be very temperamental. I'll wait here."
I paced back, and forth trying to think of how I could tell her of my feelings for her. Suddenly, Stayne and three Red Knights approached. I drew my claymore, and the Red Knights charged me. The sound of clanging swords filled the air. I then heard a slight rustling sound from the grass, and hoped that it wasn't Alice. I couldn't let the Red Knights capture her! One of the knights knocked me to the ground, and bound my hands. My hat fell as they hauled me to my feet, and made me face Stayne. I wanted to spit in his face, but held myself in check. I had to control myself for Alice's sake.
Stayne ordered his knights, "Take him to Salazen Grum."
They pushed me forward, and all I could think was Downal wyth Bluddy Behg Hid. Apparently, I mumbled it, and the Red Knight looked at me with anger.
"Oh, I can't wait to see the Red Queen. Perhaps we could have tea together," I fibbed, and a Red Knight struck me on my head with his weapon.
If I was hit one more time, I would let my madness take over, and kill them! Thank goodness that my mind then turned to Alice. The poor dear was left all alone, and lost. I hope someone would find her, and take her to the White Queen safely. Hopefully my death wouldn't be in vain. Goodness, I was already anticipating hearing the Red Queen order my head off, which I was more than positive would happen since I was hiding Alice.
We arrived at the Red Queen's castle. The drawbridge lowered and I was lead across it into the court yard. The drawbridge was raised once more. The Red Queen was playing croquet with her flamingo and hedgehog. Those poor creatures, I thought. I wished I could help them. The Queen stopped her game and walked up to me.
"You brought me the hatter. Why him, Stayne?" she asked wondering why I'm here.
I decided to play along. "Oh well, since nobody knows, I guess I'll just be on my way. Good day..."
The Red Knight on my left hit me and I just laughed.
"Silence, you fool!" the Queen shouted. She then calmed down and continued speaking to the Knave. "Throw him in the dungeons and get him to talk. I want to know where Alice is."
Stayne bowed to her , and lead the knights , and me to the dungeons. I hate to tell them. I won't budge. They will have to kill me before I tell them anything about where Alice was.
The dungeons were horrible. It was almost dark; the place was damp, and the smell was revolting. The knights walked me past Bielle, and her pups. Poor Bayard; I would likely do the same as he if it were my family trapped here. I detest blackmail. They opened my cell, and cuffed my feet to the floor in long shackles. They cuffed my hands to shackles suspended from the ceiling in the middle of the cell. I knew what was about to happen. They'll try to get me to talk, and it won't be pretty. The knights started punching me in the face.
"Where is Alice, Hatter?" Stayne asked me, and grabbed the whip from the hook off the wall from outside the cell.
Why I deliberately tested his patience, I still don't know. "Did you figure out why a raven is like a writing desk?"
He swung the whip, and it struck me in my ribs. I let out a groan of discomfort. He walked up to me, and pressed his face close to mine.
He threatened me this time, "You're making my patience run thin. You either tell me where Alice is or it will get a lot worse for you."
I looked at him and sounding very serious, asked, "Who are you looking for again?"
He cracked the whip again, and it struck my ribs on my other side. I looked at him, and decided that since I was likely going to die regardless, I may as well be playful, and silly.
"Hatter, you will tell me where I can find Alice even if I have to beat or strangle it out of you!" he warned.
I smiled, and the silliness took over from here, "I think a raven is like a writing desk because…"
He cracked the whip on my back, and felt the skin slice open. A gasp of pain escaped me, and I bit my lower lip. I started to laugh a little.
I continued with the silliness by singing, "I've got the lovely bunch of coconuts…"
Stayne cracked the whip, and I felt my left butt cheek slice open. I was in pain, and my arms were tired from being held up for so long.
He was practically shouting at me now. "Where is she, Hatter?!"
I thought for a little bit, and still played with him, "She could be here. She could be there. She could be anywhere. What's behind door number two lass?"
He cracked the whip, and he got me on my left hip. I let out a yelp because I was in so much pain now. He didn't ask again; he just flung that whip into my other hip. I yelped again the pain was too unbearable for me to hide anymore. He grabbed my throat, and strangled me. I tried to grasp for air.
One of the knights must have felt sorry for me, and pleaded, "Stayne, he's not going to budge. Let's leave him for a while, and then come back for him later."
He finally removed his hand from my neck. "Take him down, and chain him to that wall over there."
They removed the shackles from my hands, and shoved me to the wall. I hit the wall with a loud thud, and collapsed to the floor unable to move. I tried to pick myself up, but failed. I fell back down due to the intense pain I felt all over.
"I'll be back for you, Hatter. You had better talk next time or you will lose your head." Stayne smirked, and left the cell.
I couldn't retaliate because I was trying to breathe normally. The knights closed my cell, and locked it.
They walked away, and I called out, "Be sure to have an answer for the riddle I've asked."
The door slammed closed, and I chuckled. Ooh...that hurt very badly! I finally summoned enough strength to sit up, and OUCH my gut! I'd probably have to sit awkwardly against this wall for awhile.
Alice, my dear, sweet Alice, you will live to slay the Jabberwocky even if I have to die for you. How does one tell someone that you love her? The proving part would be easy, but how do you say it? Should I simply flat out tell her or should I kiss her? No, don't kiss her or you'll most certainly frighten her. If I wasn't in so much pain I could think more clearly. I'm in so much pain that I imagined I heard Alice asking Bielle where I was, and she told Alice how badly I've been beaten. I couldn't take the throbbing in my buttocks anymore, so I lay on my side. I saw my reflection in a puddle, and goodness gracious, I looked horrible! Suddenly, I heard a voice I had only recently realized I was in love with.
"Tarrant?"
I looked up, and there was Alice. _Gonadh, _she was too tall.
I groaned, "You've grown."
She replied, "Blame it on the overindulgence of upelkuchen."
I smiled, and laughed to myself, but goodness the pain. It needed to go away. She smiled at me, and I almost forgot what I was sworn to do. She reached to grab something, and then I caught sight of something.
She tried to make me feel better. "I've brought you something."
When I stood up, and looked at her through the bars, she passed something through them. It was my hat. I limped to the bars, and carefully took it. I was bent, and stooped with pain, but I managed to put it back on my head nonetheless.
She touched my heart when she told me, "There you are. You look like yourself again."
My heart leapt but I sadly asked, "I should wear it to my execution, don't you think?"
Alice looked at me as if I was mad, and protested, "We're going to get you out before that!"
I walked up to the bars, and looked up at her pleading, "You must not worry about me. The Vorpal Sword is here in the castle. Retrieve it and…"
She didn't let me finish. "I came here to help you."
I tried to reassure her. "You _**will **_be helping me, by helping everyone in Underland."
She tried to get me to see sense. "Tarrant, they want to execute you! Don't you want to live?"
I spoke truthfully. "Not in a world of her making."
What she told me made me realize that she felt something for me as well, "But this world won't be the same without you in it."
My Alice, she couldn't have said that, and not have any feelings for me. My heart yelled at me to tell her my love, and my head told me to wait until Frabjous Day. I reached through the bars, and my hand touched her cheek.
I, lovingly, told her, "You could almost make me forget what I have sworn to do."
She smiled at me, and just when I started to lean forward, I heard Nivens clear his throat. I looked his way, and so did Alice. I nodded at him, and returned to business.
I finished telling her what to do, "Retrieve the sword, Alice. Return it to the White Queen in Marmoreal. It's the only chance we have."
She asked, "Where do they keep it?"
I looked at Nivens, and nodded in his direction, "Nivens will take you."
Alice touched my hand, "When I come back, we'll all go to Marmoreal together."
I got up, and adjusted my hat. I walked back to the wall and turned back to her.
All I could tell her was, "Thank you for my hat."
She rushed off with Nivens, and I was left alone. This time my body must have forced me to sleep to ease the pain because the darkness took me within moments.
It must have been hours later when I heard someone call my name. I opened my eyes, and looked toward the door of my cell. It was Mally.
"What are you doing here?" I asked her being curious.
"Busting you out what do you think?" she said sarcastically trying to open the door.
Suddenly I heard footsteps, I saw Alice running up to us. _Click_, my door opened and I walked out. _Gonadh,_ she's too small again.
I inquired, "Do you have the sword?"
She placed her hands on her hips and raised her voice, "You didn't tell me it was guarded by the Bandersnatch!"
I backed up into the cell, and closed the door. Mally threw up her hands to signal she quit trying to help me. Alice remembered Mallymkun had the Bandersnatch's eye.
She looked at Mally. "I need the eye."
Mally upright refused. "No! It's my good luck charm."
"We don't have much time," Alice said, trying to reason with her.
Alice tried to take it from her. Mallymkun swatted her hand away from it.
Mallymkun told her again, "It's mine."
Alice got angry, and raised her voice, "I need that eye!"
Mallymkun drew her hatpin sword, "Then come and get it," she noticed the poker in the corner, "Wait, you take this," went up to the poker and picked it up, "I'll take this."
They both got into the sword fighting stance. Poor Alice, she was a wee bit shorter than Mally, and had a smaller weapon. Mally wasn't being fair, and Alice knew it.
She informed Mally, "Well, it's hardly fair."
Mallymkun conveyed, "Do you want the eye or don't you?"
Alice clumsily went after Mally with the sword. What Alice didn't know, Mally was adept with a sword and very quick. Since Alice wasn't adept with the sword, I decided to coach her in Outlandish; why I have no idea. It's the madness I tell you.
"Alice…orgal!" I alerted her and she looked at me in confusion.
She inquired, "What?"
I repeated, "Orgal!"
Alice informed me, "I don't know what that means!"
She got knocked sideways by Mallymkun's weapon.
Then I cautioned her, "Watch your left."
Mally came after her again, and I advised, "Noge! Noge!" showing her duck.
The weapon just missed her head. Thank goodness, my brave Alice wanting to learn to fight for the Jabberwocky. I continued to instruct her in Outlandish, and she started picking up the words by learning the actions. Now Mally was starting to get a run for the money. She fought fairly this time.
I continued to instruct her, "Orgal (left) again! Now stang (right). Slothish (slowly)…nunz (not yet). Zounder (behind you)!"
Alice sliced the thin rope around Mallymkun's waist which held the leather bag containing the eye. The bag dropped to the ground. Alice caught it and ran back to go get the sword. Mally didn't budge. I nodded at her.
"Well done," I told her but Alice fought beautifully if I do say so myself.
Not much longer after Alice left, Stayne and four Red Knights opened the cell door. Mally hid herself in the darkest corner of my cell. They walked in, and Stayne motioned the knights to me. They picked me up, and of course I was still feeling the pain from our last hitting session. Stayne motioned for them to punch me in the stomach. They did, and I bent over from the pain. I inhaled through enclosed teeth to signal I still hurt.
Stayne demanded, "Where is she?"
The silliness took over again, and it would get me in trouble, "Did you ever figure out why a raven is like a writing desk?"
Stayne kicked me in my side, and I was sure I heard something break. I yelled out in pain but Stayne knew I wasn't going to talk. He ordered the knights to show me who was in charge. They each took turns kicking me in my sides, stomach, and even punched my face. I thought they would have given up by now, but Stayne was still certain that I would break. Not in his lifetime. Downal wyth bluddy behg hid!
Stayne threatened me, "Tell me where she is and this will stop. Where…is…Alice?"
As soon as he said her name, Alice came running back with the sword. "I have the sword!" she shouted.
We all looked at each other, and Mallymkun threw me a weapon then yelled, "Klotchyn!"
I caught the weapon, and started fighting the Knights. Alice picked up the sword, of course, it was too big for her.
I called out to her, "Not yet! Take it and run!"
She stressed, "I'm not leaving…"
I knew she didn't want to leave without me but she had no choice.
Mally made matters worse when she yelled at her, "Alice run!"
Stayne turned his gaze to Alice. I wanted to punch the daylights out of that man. What I'm talking about, he's not a man at all. He's an _asal_ kisser.
Stayne had a revelation, "Alice?"
Mally and I yelled, "RUN!"
Alice ran, and I continued to fight the knights as much as I could tolerate the pain. The knights hit me in my side, and I fell to the floor yelling from the pain that shot through my body. They cuffed Mallymkun, and threw her into the cell across from mine. They cuffed my feet in the shackles, and threw me against the wall. I fell to the floor not able to get up. Mallymkun looked into my cell, and I could tell she wanted to help me. I tried getting up again, and with difficultly got to where I was sitting against the wall.
"Tarrant, why are you doing this to yourself? She's not worth it!" Mally was trying to get me to see things her way. It didn't work.
I looked at her, and countered, "She means more to me than my life. If she was the one captured, I would have done the same thing she did for me. I love her, Mallymkun. I would die for her."
Mally smiled at me, and shook her head. "You're mad."
I chuckled but then winced in pain. "Thank you."
"It wasn't a compliment," she corrected me, and curled up on the floor to sleep.
I smiled, looked up at the window, and the sun had set. My dear Alice, I hoped she made it to Marmoreal safely. I don't want my death to be in vain. Just when I was almost asleep a familiar voice startled me.
"I've always admired that hat."
I smiled, and greeted him. "Hello, Chessur."
He appeared in my cell, and pleaded with me, "Would you consider bequeathing it to me, since you won't be needing it anymore?"
I let him down gently as possible, "Wither my head goes, that way goes my hat."
"Tell me, Tarrant, is it worth it?" Chessur asked me.
"Alice holds the Vorpal Sword. If she has the courage to use it, then yes, it's worth it," I replied.
Chessur made the tisk tisk sound, and musingly stated, "One life lost for a world set free. I'm serious about the hat."
"You want my hat," I said to him, a question in my eyes.
Chessur answered me, "It's an excellent hat. I'll wear it to all the finest occasions."
I then had an idea of epic proportions. I smiled in a way that let Chessur know that I had a brilliant plan.
"You have a plan, don't you?" he surmised.
I nodded. "Yes, I do. How would you like to wear my hat tomorrow at my execution...as me?"
Chessur had a questionable expression on his face, and he too smiled wickedly, "Do tell?"
I smiled, and continued, "You will pose as me tomorrow and when they go to behead me…"
Chessur smiled, and excitingly stated, "Then I can disappear and the hat will float away."
I clapped my hands, and said, "Brilliant. Now here is what we do."
I took off my hat, and Chessur looked at it. He picked it up, and placed it on his head. He walked up to a puddle of water, and looked in it admiring himself in my hat.
"I want you to listen well. Do you see the keys on the wall by my cell?" I asked him watching him disappear, and reappear in the cell.
He nodded at me, and I continued, "Good, you will release me, and I will cuff you posing as me in the shackles. I will hide myself inside the huge crack by my cell. I will be deep in there so no one will find me. When they take you to the courtyard, I will be here freeing those for the resistance and will come for Mally, and the rest after you fly off with my hat."
Chessur loved it. He disappeared, grabbed the keys, appeared back in the cell, and relieved me from the shackles. I got up, he made himself look like me, and I cuffed him. I opened the cell door quietly, walked out, closed it, and quietly locked it. I hung the keys back up, and hid in the crack. I hope this plan will work. Alice, my love, hopefully I'll see you soon. I closed my eyes, and apparently fell asleep.
It's the dawn of the Frabjous Day. I was awaken by the guards walking to the cell. I listened very carefully, and I heard them push Mally out. I heard them take Chessur, and push him out.
"Alright you two mad ones. Off you go. We'll enjoy watching the madness go away with one swift thrust to the neck," one Red Knight laughed, and the other chimed in after.
The footsteps got quieter, and quieter as they reached the door. The keeper left with them so I was back here by myself with the other supporters of the White Queen. I came out of hiding, and grabbed the keys. I released some cats, Bielle and the puppies, some other people who supported the White Queen that I didn't know, some frogs, and some turtles. We ran out the dungeons, and toward the courtyard. We blended into the crowds, and watched the executioner sling down the sword, and my whole body disappeared. The hat floated up toward the sky, and everyone gasped. I made my way through the crowd.
Mally looked up at the hat, and Chessur's face appeared, smiling smugly. "Chessur, you dog!"
Chessur winked at her, and tossed my hat to my right when I leapt up on the balustrade.
I pulled out my sword, and shouted to the crowd, "To the abused and enslaved of the Red Queen's court, stand, and fight with us! Downal wyth Bluddy Behg Hid!"
The billed animals untied their bounded beaks, and tossed down their trays. Foot Frogs, Fish Butlers, Cat maids, and Human floor sweepers yelled out the slogan then followed us. We ran out the execution courtyard, and into the other courtyard where the Red Queen would play her croquet. Nivens, the White Rabbit, Mallymkun, the Tweedles, Chessur, and I tried to catch our breath.
Nivens congratulated Chessur on his act, "Well done, Chessur! Well done!"
I too congratulated him, "Congratulations. You just committed your first noble act."
Chessur smiled, and commented, "It was just this one time. And I got to wear the hat."
I adjusted my hat, and there was a bloodcurdling screech that filled the air. I knew that scream from anywhere; the JubJub bird. I gathered everyone up including the ones I helped break out, and we ran toward the drawbridge. We ran out the castle, and on to Marmoreal. We reached the castle entrance, and walked since I was in pain again not as much as yesterday. Alice ran out the entrance toward me.
"Tarrant!" she yelled out my name, and ran right into my arms.
Gracious, it felt so right for her to be in my arms, but she squeezed almost too tightly. She let go of me, and I saw Bayard with his wife and puppies. He was so happy with them.
He looked up at me, and smiled, "Forgive me."
I returned the smile, "Nothing to forgive."
Chessur's head appeared, and Alice picked at him, "Is that Chessur?"
He appeared on his back feet, and kissed her hand, "Lovely to see you again. How's the arm?"
Alice smiled, and filled him in, "All healed."
The White Queen still looked on for her Champion. She sighed in disappointment, and sounded as if she had given up.
Mirana, the White Queen, stated the obvious, "I don't believe anyone is coming."
Alice began to apologize, "I am sorry. But why don't you kill the Jabberwocky yourself? You must have the power."
"I specialize in the healing arts. It is against my vows to bring harm to any living thing," the White Queen informed her.
I inhaled, and stepped forward, "I will slay the Jabberwocky."
Chessur started laughing, "You would hardly last a minute. You have poor evaporating skills. I should be the one."
TweedleDum added in, "No, I should."
Dee pushed him and started arguing, "No I!"
They started arguing, and Alice looked warmed to the bone that one of us would take her place. I could tell this was working on her. _Gonadh_, I wanted to help her through this, and there was only one way to do it; help her slay the Jabberwocky. Nivens held the Oraculum then showed everyone that Alice was the only one to battle the Jabberwocky, and kill it. Everyone got quiet.
TweedleDum spoke, "No other slayer, nohow."
TweedleDee added, "If it ain't Alice, it ain't dead."
We all looked at Alice. She was plainly overwhelmed by all of this. She turned, and ran off. I called after her, but Nivens placed a paw on my arm, and shook his head for me to not follow her; to give her some time. I decided to clean up before the battle. The Queen showed me to a room where there was a bathroom. I drew a bath, undressed myself, and climbed in. I carefully cleaned my arms, chest, legs, stomach, and other places I don't care to discuss. When I was finished the water was a brownish-red form all the torture I had endured to keep Alice's whereabouts secret. To be truthful, I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I drained the water, and dried myself off. I changed into my battle clothes. The bath had rejuvenated me, and now it was time for the White Queen to regain control of the crown. I picked up my claymore, its sheath, and attached it to my belt. I walked out of my room, and outside beyond the castle walls. We all gathered to wait for Alice's decision. Gah...it was taking her forever to make up her mind. Perhaps she was donning the armor. I hoped desperately that she would fight with us.
Nivens looked toward the castle. "She's coming," he said.** **
I turned around, and smiled. She was dressed in the White Knight's armor riding the Bandersnatch with her hair worn down grasping the Vorpal Sword. _Gonadh_, she looked amazing in the armor. Everyone cheered her on, and she looked at me. She smiled at me, and I smiled at her. My heart was screaming out for me to tell her I love her. I vowed right there to wait until the battle was over. The cheers faded, and looked off in the distance. The Red Queen and her army were gathering in Tulgey Wood.
Alice raised the sword, and declared, "To the Tulgey Wood! Downal wyth Bluddy Behg Hid!"
Everyone joined in to say the chant, the Bandersnatch took off at a run, and we all followed behind at running speed. We reached Tulgey Wood, and the Red Queen was there with all her Red Knights and the Knave, Stayne, right by her side. After we arrived in the clearing, everyone fell silent.
The Red Queen greeted her sister sounding like she tasted something terrible, "Greetings Mirana."
The White Queen returned the greeting, "Iracebeth."
Nivens walked into the middle of the battlefield, and blew his trumpet. Everyone looked at him. He unrolled a parchment.
He began to read from the parchment, "On this Frabjous Day, the queens, Red and White, shall send forth their champions to do battle on their behalf…"
The White Queen added, "To the Victor, goes the Crown."
The Red Queen antagonized her, "But it looks so much better on my head than yours."
Nivens continued, "No one shall intervene until one of the combatants signals defeat."
The Red Queen added grinning, "Or dies a gruesome death."
Nivens ended it, "Call forth your champion."
Red Queen made an angry face toward everyone, and yelled out, "Jabberwocky!"
From behind her, the beast stirred. It's wingspan darkened the field. He lifted up his reptilian head, whipped his tail, and adjusted his vest. I looked at Alice, and she couldn't hide her fear. I took her hand in mine.
I leaned in to her, and whispered, "Listen for my voice."
She whispered back at me, "But this is impossible."
I countered, "Only if you believe it is."
I could tell I hit a nerve there but by the look on her face it was a good one.
She disclosed some childhood information to me, "Sometimes I believe as many as six impossible things before breakfast."
I smiled, and then brought her back to reality, "An excellent practice, but just for the moment, you should focus on the Jabberwocky."
She smiled at me.
The Red Queen teased the White Queen, "Where's your champion, little sister?"
Alice let go of my hand, walked out into the clearing, and declared, "Here."
She looked up at the Jabberwocky and she started mumbling something. I couldn't make out what she was saying; probably those six impossible things. Poor dear, she was trembling because I have to admit the Jabberwocky is not a beautiful creature. She drew the sword and the Jabberwocky hissed at it. There was a pause for a moment and then the Jabberwocky struck at her with its tongue but Alice sliced it off. Bravo, my dear Alice. The Jabberwocky whipped its tail and knocked her to the ground. He tried to stab Alice with its spiked tail but she barely moved out the way in time. She got up.
I yelled at her, "Zounder (behind you)!"
She ducked in time to escape his jaws. He tried to swat at her with his claws.
I yelled again, "Stang (right)!"
She dodged to her right to avoid the claws. Suddenly, I noticed a change in her expression; confidence. There she was full of relentless intent, and bloodlust in her eyes. She turned her head to the creature. She swung the sword at the Jabberwocky, and attacked with fury. The Jabberwocky was stunned, and I couldn't help but smile at her.
I warned her, "Ezel! Sloth now!"
She turned around, and asked, "What?"
She was distracted, and claws scrape down the back of the armor.
I said it slowly this time, "I said…sloth."
She backed up toward me fending off the Jabberwocky, and reassured me, "I can manage. Thank you."
The Red Queen was too eager to realize what I did, "The Hatter's interfering! Off with his head!"
Ah, my opportunity had arrived. Stayne ran up to me charging at me. I drew my sword, and the fight began. All you could hear was the clinging and clanging of swords, the snarling of dogs and panthers, the Bandersnatch and the JubJub bird fought fiercely, and Chessur appearing and disappearing to confuse the Red Knights. Stayne lunged at me, and I parried his thrust. We fought until I heard Alice yell something the Red Queen was famous for yelling.
"Off with your head!" Alice yelled at the creature and I hear the sword swing.
There was a thud, and I knocked Stayne down catching his sword in my hand. My sword, and his sword crisscrossed holding his neck in place. Finally, he looked at me with fear. I heard another thud, and looked into the clearing. There was the head of the Jabberwocky. Alice stood up from her fall, and she picked up the head. She dropped it in front of the Red Queen.
The Red Queen was furious, and she attempted to order the Red Knights, "Kill her!"
One of the Red Knights threw down his weapon, and told her, "We follow you no more…bloody big head."
The Red Queen got offended, and ordered, "How dare you! Off with his head!"
No one listened to her. All the knights threw down their weapons. Suddenly, the crown floated off the Red Queen's head, and flew over to the White Queen were it landed gently on her head.
The White Queen declared, "Iracebeth of Crims, your crimes against Underland are worthy of death. But that is against my vows. Therefore, you are banished to the Outlands. No one is to show you kindness or ever speak a word to you. You will have no one to speak to…not a friend in the world."
I let Stayne go, and he walked up to the queen, and bowed down before her, "Majesty, I hope you bear me no ill will."
The White Queen continued, "Except this one. Ilosovic Stayne you will join Iracebeth in banishment in the Outlands from this day until the end of Underland," and motioned for the White Guards to cuff them.
The Red Queen passionately told Stayne, "At least we have each other."
Stayne pulled out a knife, and tried to stab her. I knocked the knife out his hand, and Stayne tried to plead with the queen.
"Kill me...please!" he begged her.
The queen didn't even think about it, "But I don't owe you kindness. Take them."
The White Guards dragged them off, and all you could hear from the Red Queen was, "You tried to kill me!"
I smiled, rejoicing. "Oh, Frabjous Day! Callou! Callay!" I began the Futterwacken.
I danced like I've never danced before. I was filled to the brim with joy, love, and happiness.
I heard Alice ask Chessur, "What's he doing?"
Chessur told her, "Futterwacken."
At the end of my dance, I grabbed Alice, and passionately kissed her. It felt right. She was there with me kissing me the same way I kissed her. I knew she felt the same for me ever since I took her to go see Absolem. We finally parted to get air. We looked at each other, and we both knew what would happen next. I just didn't want it to happen.
The White Queen approached us, "Alice, you have our everlasting gratitude. And for your efforts on our behalf," and handed her a vial of the Jabberwocky blood.
She took the vial and asked, "Is this the way home?"
The queen nodded, and told her, "Drink."
Finally I let my heart speak, "Don't!"
She turned to me, and couldn't believe I said that, "What?"
I finally spoke with my whole heart, "Stay with us."
She gasped at what I said, and looked around at all of us. Then her face saddened. I knew she would leave us. I wanted to say it so bad.
With sadness in her voice, she told me, "I wish I could. But there are questions I have to answer."
She looked at Nivens, and smiled at him, "And things I'm late for doing."
I shook my head, and raised my voice, "You won't remember me."
She took the cork off the bottle, "I will."
She tilted her head back, and I took the vial from her, "I want you to stay because I love you!"
She looked at me with an expression of revelation. I couldn't believe I just said that. Finally after the past two days, I told her how I felt. If only it would change the situation.
She took my face in her hands, and made me look at her in the eyes, "You love me?"
I confessed, "I put myself through torture to save you. I would have died for you, and that is still an option if I have to take it. I don't think I could live on without you."
Tears filled her eyes, and she told me, "Tarrant, my brave hatter, I almost died for Underland, and I would do it for you in a heartbeat. I want you to kiss me like you did earlier because I love you so much."
I closed my eyes, and very gentlemanlike replied, "My pleasure, mademoiselle."
We both leaned forward, and passionately kissed each other. She ran her fingers through my hair, and I pulled her closer to me. Goodness this felt so right to be near her this way, and to have her in my arms. I couldn't breathe, and I'm sure she couldn't either. We broke the kiss, and smiled at each other.
She stroked my cheek, and turned to the queen, "Is there a way for me to go back and then to return after I say some farewells?"
I smiled knowing I won her. The Queen thought about it, and then had a realization. She took another vial of blood and gave it to me. I was shocked.
The White Queen explained, "You will return to the Otherland, but you will need someone from this land to help you come back. Since you and Tarrant are now a couple, I think he will be the right one to accompany you back to your homeland."
