Chapter 66

Before he could leave the room—not that he wanted to leave, but he did feel the need to touch base with everyone out in the waiting room—Bellamy had to have a wristband put on. Clarke got one, too, as did Avery, except hers was on her ankle. They all said the same thing: Blake, Baby girl, Avery, as well as the date, doctor's name, and some identification numbers of some sort.

Bellamy walked out into the waiting room proudly wearing that wristband, beaming as he looked down at the name a few times. Blake. Avery was a Blake.

There were more people there than he remembered. Lexa and Miller and some other people had shown up. Some people were walking around, some were stretching in their seats, and some were taking to each other or watching TV. But when he showed up, they all stood, stared at him with wide, expectant eyes, and looked as if they were holding their breath.

"She had the baby," he announced.

It was a whole mixture of sounds after that, some delighted gasps, some cheers, and of course some happy crying. People started hugging each other and hugging him, and it was a lot going on. But it was all good. All so good. He hugged his mom and Octavia the longest, naturally, and was surprised that Octavia was actually one of the people who was crying. She didn't shed many tears.

"Congratulations," she said.

"Thanks." He felt himself grinning from ear to ear, because he was just so damn happy.

"Are they doing okay?" Clarke's mom asked.

"Yeah, they're good," he assured her. "She did so good. She . . . she didn't even have an epidural. She just . . ." He felt tears sting his eyes as he thought about how hard that had been, how much Clarke had just had to go through, and he was so proud of her. "And Avery's beautiful," he said, his voice wavering with emotion. "I mean, when you guys see her . . ."

"When can we?" Octavia asked eagerly.

"Not yet, honey," his mother told her.

"Yeah, we're still kinda . . . there's a lot goin' on," he said, "but I just wanted to let you guys know." Right now, the priorities were getting Avery to feed for the first time and then getting her through her first exams and check-ups.

"Well, just go back there," Raven urged him. "Don't worry about us."

"Yeah, go be with her," Murphy agreed.

"Okay." He was glad they didn't expect much more out of him right now, because he didn't want to leave his girls for too long. "Thanks, guys," he said before he headed back down the hall to Clarke's room, feeling overwhelmed in the best way possible to have all of them there, to feel support from so many people.

When he got back to the room, he saw that Clarke was holding Avery to her breast, and one of the nurses, the designated lactation consultant, was working with her to get the baby feeding while the other one checked her vitals. "There you go," the lactation nurse said softly. "That's a good latch."

Clarke smiled down at Avery in awe, then glanced up at him and said, "Bellamy, come look. I'm actually doing this."

He wasn't sure he'd ever actually seen a woman breastfeed before. If it had been anyone but Clarke, he would have tried to be polite and look away. "Wow," he said, making his way towards the bed. It was pretty amazing seeing her doing that and making it look so natural. It was natural, he supposed, but for her to be doing it for the first time . . . she didn't seem hesitant or unsure at all.

"Now you won't actually produce any milk for another day or two," the nurse told her.

"Why not?" Clarke asked.

"Because your body needs to trigger the hormones that tell it to make milk," the nurse explained. "That's what's happening right now. But don't worry, you're still nourishing her. What she's getting right now is called colostrum. It's sort of the step before breastmilk."

Crazy, Bellamy thought. Clarke could nourish another human being. Moms were . . . fucking awesome, honestly.

"Well, as long as that's normal," Clarke said.

"It is," the nurse assured her.

As Avery continued to suckle away—another thing that amazed Bellamy, because she wasn't even an hour old, yet she still had this incredible instinct—Clarke asked, "So she's gonna need to do this every couple hours?"

"Most likely," the nurse said.

Clarke wasn't going to be getting much uninterrupted sleep then. Bellamy worried about that a bit, but she didn't seem concerned in the slightest. "Isn't this surreal, Bellamy?" she said, beaming a smile at him.

"Yeah." It felt like a very vivid dream in some ways, but when he touched Avery's soft little head, he knew it was real. "I love you," he said, not just to Clarke, not just to Avery, but to both of them.

"I love you, too," Clarke said.

He leaned in and kissed her, just a quick kiss, but it felt pretty meaningful in its own way.

"So did you tell everyone?" she asked him.

"Yeah. They were really happy," he said. "Lexa's here now, too. And Miller and Jasper and Lincoln. Everyone."

"That's nice," Clarke said. "But I don't think I'm ready for them all to come back here yet."

"No, me, neither." He wasn't going to rush through these moments with Clarke and . . . well, with his family. They needed a little bit of time that was just for them.

"Plus, I still have to deliver the placenta." Clarke made a face of disgust.

"Oh, no, you already did that," the other nurse in the room informed her.

"I did?"

"Yep. You were just so wrapped up in your new baby that you didn't even notice."

Clarke laughed a little. "Works for me."

Bellamy was relieved for her, because he just wanted her to be able to relax now. She deserved that much.

"Look at her," he said when Avery tried to grab onto one of his massive fingers. "She's already trying to grab onto things."

"She's amazing," Clarke said. "Look how tiny her hands are. Granted, yours are really big."

"She's just tiny all over," he said. Little head, little hands, little feet. "How much does she weigh?" he asked the nurses.

"Seven pounds, two ounces," one of them replied.

"So I just lost seven pounds, two ounces," Clarke declared.

"Oh, more than that," the lactation consultant informed her. "You lost blood, fluids, amniotic fluid. Most moms lose around twelve pounds."

"That's fantastic," Clarke said excitedly. "Oh, this was all worth it. All the hormones and mood swings and even all the pain . . . I wouldn't trade this for anything."

Me, neither, Bellamy thought. Not that he'd had to go through anywhere near as much as she had to get to this point.

Avery made a little gurgling sound, stopped suckling, and Clarke said, "Oh, I think she's done."

"You can go ahead and wipe her mouth off," the lactation nurse said, handing Clarke a towel so she could do so. "There you go. Good job."

Clarke kept Avery close to her chest—skin to skin contact promoting that bonding and everything—and asked, "What happens next?"

"Well, now she gets all her traditional newborn care," the nurse said.

"Like shots and stuff?"

The nurse nodded. "There are a couple of shots. They usually don't like those very much. And we'll give her a full medical exam, and then she'll get a nice sponge bath once she can maintain her temperature."

"Where does that happen?" Clarke asked.

"We can do that all here in this room if that's what you prefer, or we can take her to the nursery."

Clarke looked at Bellamy and asked, "What do you think?"

"It's up to you," he said. He was fine with whatever she preferred right now.

She thought about it for a moment, then said, "I don't wanna sound like a bad mom, but . . . I'm so tired."

"Of course you are," the nurse said. "Think of everything you've just gone through."

"Sending her to the nursery doesn't make you a bad mom at all, if that's what you choose," the other nurse added. "You need time to recover on your own, too."

Clarke still looked a bit torn over the decision and reluctant to even let go of Avery, so Bellamy put his hand on her shoulder and reassured her, "It's okay." She didn't have to feel bad about feeling tired.

"Okay," she echoed, blinking back tears. "Can he go with her?" she asked shakily.

"Absolutely."

"Will you do that?" she asked him.

"Yeah." Hell, he wanted to go with her, just to see everything that was going on, ask questions if he had them.

"Just go be with her then," Clarke said, carefully handing Avery over to him. "I just have to rest for a minute. But don't leave her."

"Don't worry, I won't," he promised, holding the tiny little blanket-swaddled girl close to his chest. He wanted to try some skin to skin contact later, too. He'd heard about dads who took their shirts off when holding babies because it promoted bonding with them, too. And since he wasn't actually biologically bonded with her . . . yeah, he wanted to do that.

"Okay," Clarke said, her sleepy eyes never leaving Avery as he carried her towards the door.

It was the lactation nurse that came to the door with him and said, "She says, 'I'll see you soon, Mommy.'"

"See you soon," Clarke said, her eyes starting to fall closed despite how hard she appeared to be trying to keep them open.

"Follow me," the nurse said as she opened the door. Bellamy headed out into the hall with her, where some sort of transporter crib was waiting for her. "You can put her right in here," she said.

He didn't really want to let go of her, either, but he figured he'd just do whatever the hospital staffers told him to do. They were pros at this; he was the newbie.

"And off we go," the nurse said after he set her down.

The nursery wasn't far away, but Bellamy did have to put on some scrubs and wash his hands thoroughly before he could enter. Which made sense. That required him to take his eyes off of Avery for a couple of minutes, though, which he felt bad about. When he got in the nursery, he saw a couple of other babies, two of whom were sleeping, and one that was being bottle-fed by a nurse. But Avery had both a new nurse and a doctor—not Dr. Jackson but an older man, a pediatrician—with her. He approached her little table to see that they had un-swaddled her and placed a little metallic-looking heart on her stomach.

"What's that?" he asked.

"A thermometer," the nurse said. "Cute, isn't it? We're constantly monitoring her temperature, and she's laying on a warmer. Right now, her body's taking heat away from her feet and hands to supply warm blood to her heart, her lungs, her brain, all that good stuff."

He couldn't even wrap his mind around all the things that were happening with her right now. How did someone go from being inside a womb to being pushed through a birthing canal to existing in the outside world in such a short amount of time? (Well, it probably hadn't felt short to Clarke, but . . .)

"And what about this thing?" he asked, pointing to what remained of the umbilical cord. "It'll fall off on its own, right?"

"Yes."

It was a little bit strange to see a stump coming from a baby's bellybutton, not the kind of thing people actually pictured when they pictured newborns. "Sorry, I have a lot of questions," he said.

"That's fine," the nurse said. "We have a lot of answers."

The doctor tapped the machine displaying Avery's temperature and said, "Even though she's only at ninety-seven right now, it's nothing to be concerned about. We should start to see that go up soon. And I'll be examining her while it does."

Bellamy nodded, but when the doctor took out a needle, he stiffened in alarm. "Wait, what's that?"

"We have to draw her blood to check her glucose level," the doctor explained. "Among other things. A blood test is the best indicator of a baby's overall health."

Blood test? he thought. Already? But she wasn't even an hour old yet. More like forty-five minutes. And she already had to have her blood drawn? "Okay," he said. Even though he didn't like the thought of it, he knew it had to be done. God forbid, if something was wrong with her, something that they couldn't see and Bellamy couldn't even pronounce, they needed to find out.

The doctor poked the bottom of Avery's foot to draw blood, which caused her to cry out. "I know, that doesn't feel good, does it?" he said.

Sorry, Princess, Bellamy thought, wishing he could make it painless for her.

"It can be hard to see your baby get poked like that," the nurse said, "but just remember, it's all for her own good."

He nodded, knowing there were reasons—and maybe even laws, in some instances—for them doing whatever it was they did. Avery was in good hands. And when this exam was done, she could be back in his hands again.

"Now I'm gonna do a full body exam," the nurse said, "just to make sure nothing's broken or functioning improperly." She started to feel Avery all over, pressing down in some spots, and doing things like circling her legs out from her hips. She must have been checking to see if everything was aligned properly or something. She looked perfect to Bellamy, so he hoped nothing was wrong. He held his breath through what felt like the entire physical exam, but the nurse talked him through it and explained things like how all the creases on her skin were equal, which apparently was a good thing, and how her hips checked out as aligned, and how it was normal for her to be a little swollen.

"Her feet are really . . . wrinkled," he commented, wondering if that was normal, too. "And dry." He hadn't pictured that when he pictured a newborn, either, because people always talked about how soft the skin of babies was.

"That's the sign of a full-term infant," the nurse said.

"Well, almost full-term." She'd still surprised them by coming a little bit early. But he didn't mind. May 9 was the perfect day to be Avery's birthday.

From what Bellamy observed, the nurse was the one who did most of the work, but the doctor remained to give some more shots. He gave her a vitamin K shot in her thigh, which apparently all babies got, but Avery cried upon getting pricked with that one, too, but at least it was quick and didn't seem to hurt for too long. There was also a Hepatitis B shot, which Bellamy had to grant them permission to give her. He had to look away for that one, because he just hated having to stand there and watch her cry and not be able to do anything about it.

Thankfully, once the shots were done, it was onto something less painful: eye drops. Luckily, Avery had her eyes open, so that went smoothly enough.

"She's really lookin' around a lot," Bellamy noted. He hadn't imagined that she would be so alert right away.

"Yeah, she wants to see the world for the first time," the nurse said.

He wondered what the world looked like to her. Or did it look like anything? "Can she?" he asked. Puppies and kittens were basically born blind and deaf, so were babies different?

"It's blurry for her right now," the nurse said, "but yes, she can see you."

She can see me? He let that sink in as he looked down at her and smiled. She stopped squirming and making noises and instead just looked right back at him through puffy eyes. He wondered if she knew him, if she knew that he was the same guy who'd talked to her while she was in her mother's stomach.

Once Avery's temperature was up to ninety-eight degrees and the pediatrician had already left, the nurse sat her up and said, "Okay, you're warm enough for your little bath now. Yes, you are. You're gonna be so clean when you go back to your mommy." She proceeded to wipe her off with a warm washcloth, which Avery didn't seem to particularly enjoy, but Bellamy kind of got a kick out of it. His mom had told him that he never really liked getting baths when he was little, either.

"Are you two wanting her to stay in the room with you or stay here in the nursery?" the nurse asked once she was done with the bath and had begun to put a diaper on Avery.

"Uh, in the room, I think," he said, slightly distracted as he tried to pay attention to the diapering process. Yeah, he was gonna need some help on that before he left the hospital, because everything he'd learned about it in Lamaze had left his head. "I mean, it's really up to Clarke. I know she's tired."

"As are you, I'm sure," the nurse said.

"Nah, I'm alright." He'd probably crash out at some point, but not yet. "I just wanna watch her." He stared down at the little girl, still in awe, pretty sure that he'd never stop being in awe of her. Avery Blake was . . . pretty special.

Once the baby's temperature reached that perfect 98.6, she was swaddled in two blankets, and the nurse put a little pink knit cap on her to help keep her warm. Everything had checked out as normal, so that meant the exam was over, and Bellamy was able to take her back to the hospital room. The nurse accompanied him and held open the door as he pushed the transport crib inside. Clarke must not have been sleeping very deeply, or maybe she just sensed that her newborn daughter was near, because she opened her eyes and asked, "Is she done?"

"Yeah. They said everything looks good." He pushed the crib close to her bed and asked her, "Did you get a little sleep?"

"A little," she said.

He wanted her to get some more, especially since Avery was going to need to be fed again in a couple more hours. But he could read the look on Clarke's weary face clearly: She wanted to hold her again. He picked her up out of the crib an handed her over. As much as he wanted to be greedy and hold her himself, there would be plenty of time for that while Clarke was sleeping.

"I can't believe she's finally here," Clarke said. "It's her birthday."

"Happy birthday, Avery," he said, stroking her little cheek with his index finger.

"Yeah, happy birthday," Clarke said, resting her head back against the pillow. "I wish I had more energy."

"You deserve to rest," he said. He could stay awake, no problem.

"Mmm," Clarke moaned, her eyes momentarily falling shut. It looked to take a great deal of what little energy she had just to open them again. "Maybe you should hold her," she suggested. "Here."

He took the baby back from her, surprised how natural this all felt for him, too. Had he ever even held a baby before, besides Octavia? He couldn't remember.

"I like her middle name," he said. His sister would like it, too.

"I knew you would." She managed a sleepy smile.

"And her last name," he added. "I wasn't sure . . . well, you know."

"Yeah," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I probably should've asked if that was okay."

"No, I'm glad you didn't," he said. "Hearing you say her name like that was . . ." He swallowed hard, feeling like he could get emotional just thinking about it again, because it really made him feel . . . proud wasn't even a strong enough word. Morel like honored. "It means a lot," he said, unable to say more without crying.

"Good," she said, closing her eyes again. "I can't stay awake, Bellamy," she said, all of her words blending together.

"That's okay," he said. "Sleep while you can. I got her."

"You got her," Clarke breathed out as sleep took hold of her. She'd probably be drifting in and out of it a lot, and she was going to be on whatever Avery wanted her feeding schedule to be. Maybe once she slept for a couple of hours, though, she'd feel up to having some people come into the room. Her parents, at the very least. Hopefully his mom and Octavia, too.

There he sat next to her hospital bed, with a baby in his arms, one who had fallen asleep just like her mother had. And despite how tired he actually was, too, he'd never felt more awake in his entire life.

...

Clarke knew she was going to have to sleep whenever Avery slept. And that was how it was going to be for months, unless she got lucky and somehow had a baby who could sleep through the night. It made her feel better to know that Bellamy was staying awake and watching over her, even though he had to be exhausted, too.

She woke up instinctively—and was proud of herself for that—when she heard Avery just beginning to cry. Figuring she needed to be fed again, she tried it on her own this time without the help of the nurse. And it actually worked. At first, Avery didn't have a good latch, so she stayed calm, started over, and that time, it worked. It wasn't Avery's fault, either. She was a natural, but Clarke was kind of the one who was fumbling.

Bellamy reminded her to drink some water while she was feeding, because he didn't want her getting dehydrated. Unfortunately, that only made it so she had to go to the bathroom. Which was an experience. It involved two nurses helping her stand and walk in there, warning her that there would be a lot of blood and other fluids. She chose not to look, because just feeling it was enough. They gave her sanitary supplies, of course, but overall, it was just really gross.

Since she was definitely still recovering, she didn't feel the slightest bit bad about not allowing visitors in to see the baby until she was ready for them; so she fell back asleep after Avery's second feeding, dozed for a while, and awoke again when she heard a gurgle. False alarm, though. Avery wasn't getting fussy or needing to be fed again. She was just making sounds here and there while Bellamy carried her around the room.

"Hey," he said when she saw she was awake again.

"Hey." She looked to the window, unable to tell if it was sunny or not outside since the curtains were pulled. "What time is it?" she asked him.

"6:00," he replied.

"At night?"

"Yeah." He sat down in the chair next to her hospital bed, and she noticed that Avery was trying to keep her eyes open, trying to pay attention and look at the world around her. But it'd been a big, tiring day for her, too, and her little eyes were closing once again.

"I told Raven and Murphy and everyone to just go home for the night," Bellamy revealed. "But they're gonna come back tomorrow. Everyone, all our friends."

"Good." That took a little pressure off tonight. Besides, they'd all been hanging out there long enough. Over twenty-four hours. They were pretty damn good friends. "Are my parents still here?" she asked, having a harder time picturing them leaving without seeing the baby first.

"Yeah," he said, "just them and Alyssa and Kane, and my mom and Octavia."

So the family members then. Not that Raven and Murphy and all those guys weren't family, but . . . a different kind of family. "They probably wanna see her," she said.

"I think so. You feel up to it?" he asked.

Now was probably about as good of a time as any, with Avery snoozing and her not feeling the urge to pee. "Yeah."

"Alright." He carefully handed Avery over to her, setting her on her chest, and said, "I'll go get 'em."

"Not everyone at once, okay?" She didn't want things to get too chaotic.

"Okay," he agreed as he left the room. He must have been so ready to sleep, but he still had this bounce in his step. Adrenaline or something.

"You hear that?" she said to Avery, gently patting her back. "You're about to meet your grandparents." She was really curious how her mom and dad would react to her, just given . . . everything. Given the fact that they'd almost been grandparents once before. "They're gonna love you," she said, "just like Daddy and I do." There might have been a time when they didn't love the idea of her being a mom, but now, things were different.

...

Clarke smelled breakfast before she even left her bedroom. Various aromas drifted upstairs and floated underneath the crack in her door. When she ventured downstairs, she saw that her mom had prepared an abundance of pancakes, eggs, and hash browns. None of that really sounded appetizing, though. Her stomach felt a bit too precarious to shovel down any of that, but she didn't want to be rude and turn it down. So she took a seat at the table and allowed her mom to set plate after plate of food in front of her, even though a simple banana would have sufficed.

"Mom, I don't need so much breakfast," she said.

"Sure you do," her mother said. She didn't crack a smile or even look Clarke in the eye, and her voice was sort of a grumble when she added, "You're eating for two now."

Clarke looked down at her stomach, wondering when that would start to become obvious. So far, she didn't look pregnant. But what if she started to show soon? Then everyone would know. And she'd have to tell Bellamy.

"Did Dad already leave for the day?" she asked as her mother wiped off the mess she'd made on the kitchen counter.

"No," her mom replied. "He's in his study."

Clarke glanced that way, noting the closed double doors. She usually tried not to bother him when he was working in there, but . . . it didn't seem likely that he was getting any work done. "I should go talk to him," she decided, standing up from the table.

"No," he mother said sharply. "I think . . . I think he'd just like a little time alone right now."

Clarke frowned. What did that mean? He didn't want to talk to her? He didn't even want to see her?

"He's still figuring out how to handle everything," her mom said. "We both are."

Slowly, sadly, Clarke sat back down. So am I, she thought. Her mind was still racing with worry, too, even though she'd had a few more days to think about this. She could give her dad space for now, but eventually, she was going to need his advice. And his support. "I didn't do this on purpose, you know," she said weakly. "It was an accident."

Her mom turned around, back towards her, shoulders tense, and pressed her hands onto the kitchen counter. "I know," she said, sounding a little . . . angry. Or maybe just stressed. It was hard to tell the difference. "I've seen accidents like this happen before," she said. "And I've seen what happens to girls who . . . grow up too fast."

Clarke could only imagine what fears were running through her head. If it was anything like the things she'd seen in movies, then yeah, it was scary stuff. But she wasn't going to drop out of school or get hooked on drugs or anything else extreme like that. "Nothing's gonna happen to me," she said.

"Oh, nothing?" Her mom spun around, a challenging look on her face. "You think nothing will change?"

"Well . . . no." She wasn't that naïve.

"You have no idea how hard this is gonna be for you, Clarke, even with your father and me helping out," her mother warned her. "Instead of going out with your friends, you'll be at home with your baby. Instead of going to school, you'll be going to doctor's appointments. I wouldn't be surprised if you end up having to take online classes instead of . . ."

Clarke tensed. Instead of what? she thought. Going to high school? No, things wouldn't change that drastically. Would they?

"And what about college?" her mom asked. "Have you even though about that?"

She really hadn't, because right now, that just seemed so far away, something to worry about when she got closer to it. "I'm just taking it one day at a time," she said. That felt like the only way she could manage right now, the only way she could avoid a complete emotional breakdown.

"Fine, you do that," her mom muttered, turning back around to continue cleaning up the kitchen. "I'll think about the future."

Clarke opened up her mouth to say something, to try to stick up for herself, in a way, but no words came out. Because she feared her mom was right. She wasn't thinking about the future. Not really. Because the future scared her.

...

Clarke's mom was the first visitor to come into the hospital room when Bellamy opened up the door for them. Her dad was right behind her, and the minute they saw Avery, they both got teary-eyed. Alyssa and Kane came in with them, both of them hanging back a bit.

"Oh . . . Clarke," her mom gasped quietly, coming towards the bed. She bent down close to Avery, clasped one hand over her mouth as if to keep from crying too loudly, and instead just let a few happy tears fall. "Look at her," she said. "She's beautiful."

"Yeah," Clarke agreed. "She's a little sleepy right now."

"I bet you both are," her father said.

"Kinda." Part of her had a little bit of an adrenaline rush going on, though, too. As tired as she was, she also felt this rush of energy when she was awake and holding her baby in her arms. After such a long time waiting around, she was sure her parents wanted to feel that rush, too, so she offered, "Here, you wanna hold her?"

"Oh, yes," her mother answered eagerly. Clarke handed her over, making sure her mom was cradling her neck and head and everything, even though the woman was a doctor and knew way more about handling babies than either she or Bellamy did. "Hi, sweetie," she cooed. "You're so precious."

So precious, Clarke thought. Maybe she was biased, but Avery was the cutest little baby she'd ever seen.

"So everything went well?" her dad asked.

"Yeah," she said. "It was endless, but . . . Bellamy got me through it." She smiled at her boyfriend, so grateful that he'd shown up, because there was no one else in the world she could have gone through this with.

"I didn't do much," he said modestly.

"Yes, you did." She doubted he even understood the strength he'd given her, how just hearing him say that she was doing great and having his hand to hold onto had gotten her through the most demanding experience of her life.

Kane walked to the other side of her bed, told her, "We're all very proud of you," and bent down to give her a kiss on the top of her head.

"Thanks," she said. It meant a lot that he was there, because even though he wasn't technically her stepfather yet, he already felt like one. It was nice to know that, even though her dad lived in Baltimore, Avery would always have one of her grandpas very close by.

"Congratulations, Clarke," Alyssa said, standing at the foot of the bed. "I hope it's okay I came back here."

"Of course." Despite their shaky start, Clarke's opinion of her dad's girlfriend had really changed, especially with the bonding they'd done a couple days ago. "You're kind of a grandma now, you know," she pointed out.

Bellamy made a face. "Oh, that's weird."

Alyssa laughed a little. "I'll take it."

It wasn't surprising that everyone wanted to hold the baby, or that everyone wanted pictures taken of them holding the baby. Gradually, Avery did start to wake up and get fussy, perhaps because she was seeing all sorts of new faces for the first time, or maybe because she was hungry again. That was everyone's unofficial cue to leave so Clarke could try to feed her again, but she asked her mom to stay behind and help her out with that. Just to make sure she was doing it right. And she was. So once Avery was latched back on, her mom left the room, and Bellamy left again, too, this time to go get his mom and sister.

"We got this," Clarke said to her daughter as she suckled away. They were already finding their rhythm, making a pretty good team.

...

Back in waiting room, Bellamy saw some things he'd never seen before or thought he'd never see again: His mom and Abby hugging. A big, long embrace. Abby and Jake actually hugging again for the first time in years. Abby hugging Alyssa. Basically, Abby hugging everyone. She wasn't the most tactile or affectionate person, but her granddaughter's birth seemed to have brought out a softer side of her.

Clearly she didn't want to leave, but Kane talked her into it. He practically had to drag her out the door, but he managed it. Alyssa didn't have to drag Jake, but Jake did make sure to let Bellamy know that they were staying in a hotel that was only three minutes away, and to call if they needed anything.

Once it was just his mom and his sister left, he felt . . . really relaxed. Because with Abby and Jake, he knew there were still conversations he needed to have with them someday, issues they'd all have to work through. But he was issue-free with his family, and he was so excited for them to see . . . his daughter. Because that was what Avery was to him.

"Thanks for waiting," he said as he led them down the hall. "Clarke just didn't want too many people back there at once."

"Oh, it's fine," his mom said. "I understand."

"I'm so ready," Octavia, doing a little skip of excitement. "I get to meet my niece."

"You're gonna like her," he told her.

"You think she'll like me?"

"Ah, she'll tolerate you," he joked, "like the rest of us do."

She whacked his arm playfully, and he just smirked.

When they got to the room, he first checked with Clarke to make sure it was okay to come in. When he got the all-clear, he said, mostly to Octavia, "Okay, don't be too loud now. She just woke up."

"Who?" Octavia asked. "Clarke or Avery?"

"Both of 'em." He opened the door, almost grandly gesturing inside, and said, "Come on in."

Almost immediately, Octavia ignored his request to not be too loud, because she squealed—the highest-pitched sound he'd ever heard her make—and went scampering towards Clarke and the baby. "Oh my god, she's so small!" she exclaimed.

"She's normal-sized," Clarke assured her.

"But she still looks so small. And cute. Like abnormally cute," Octavia babbled. "I have to be honest, I don't think most babies are cute. I think they're kinda weird-looking. I mean, I was cute, of course, but . . ."

"Do you wanna hold her?" Clarke cut in.

Octavia's whole face lit up. "Yes!"

Since Bellamy was pretty sure his little sister had even less experience with babies than he did, he made sure to keep a careful eye on her, to make sure she was holding Avery the right way and not letting her head dangle or anything.

"Aww . . ." Octavia cooed. "She's looking right at me."

"Probably thinks you look pretty funny," Bellamy joked.

"Or . . ." Clarke said. "Maybe she wants to see the person she's named after."

Octavia was so absorbed in the baby that she didn't even catch onto that at first. "Yeah," she said. Bellamy's mom heard it, though, because she gave him a curious look. Finally, the words seemed to resonate with Octavia, too, because she looked at Clarke confusedly and asked, "Wait, what do you mean?"

"Her name," Clarke said. "It's Avery Octavia Blake."

Octavia's mouth dropped open in shock. "Are you serious?" she said in disbelief. "Oh my god, that totally makes up for not being her godmother." She smiled from ear to ear and looked down at Avery again. "Hey, baby girl," she said. "You have a really awesome name. And a really awesome aunt."

Bellamy rolled his eyes, but he couldn't help but smile. It was kind of cool to see that his sister actually did like kids, because someday, she'd probably have a couple of her own.

"Blake, huh?" his mother said quietly, putting her hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah." He wasn't about to burst Octavia's bubble or anything, but Avery's last name was even more awesome than her middle one.

"Come here," his mom said, opening her arms and pulling him into a hug. Her body shook gently as he hugged her and she cried a bit. But they were a different kind of happy tears than the kind Abby had shed. Because she knew how much it meant to him for Avery to have his last name. He didn't have to say anything, because she was his mom, and she just knew.

Just as he'd expected, there were a lot more pictures taken as both Avery's grandmother and her aunt alternated holding her. Clarke, although she insisted she looked awful—she didn't—agreed to be in some of the pictures, only to help commemorate this huge day in all their lives. His mom took a lot, some on her phone, some on his, of the three of them, with Avery in her mother's arms and him kneeling down next to the hospital bed. Tired as he was, he couldn't stop smiling, because he was so damn happy. In fact, he couldn't remember ever feeling so happy before. He was a dad now, and that was the best feeling in the world.