Chapter 5
Kyouya walked into the homeroom class, early as usual. But she was there first. Mari's hair was tied up in a low ponytail, her eyes looked fine despite shedding a few tears earlier in the morning. She had her arms crossed with her baggy hoodie that hid her body into a giant lump of apathy towards the world. Mari made eye contact with the Shadow King and nodded politely.
He had so many questions.
"Good morning," he cleared his throat.
Mari raised an eyebrow at him, confused at the greeting. They held a delicate balance between tolerating one another and wanting to rip each other apart.
"Morning," Mari cautiously answered back. She reached for her travel mug with her coffee and took a sip. They were not here to make small talk. It was weird enough that he was talking to her outside of what was necessary.
The two sat in silence, with Kyouya pretending to be occupied with his laptop and Mari reaching for her earbuds in her bag.
"Harvard," the Ootori spoke up, trying to stop Mari from ignoring him completely with the earbuds. He brought up the first topic that he could think of, one that was appropriate to talk about. He had to admit, the execution of his plan was rather awkward. Mari looked at him strangely.
"Yeah, what about it?" the teenager looked at him suspiciously.
"You've accepted your offer?" Kyouya perched up his glasses against his nose bridge.
Mari blinked at him. "Yes…" she nodded slowly. She did it a few days ago, after Toudai had given her an offer as well. Ultimately, Mari decided to follow in her brother's footsteps. "D-did you?" She stuttered because she was unsure of what the Ootori was trying to get at.
"Yes," Kyouya answered stoically.
The girl nodded. "Um, congratulations, I guess."
"Why?" the Ootori pried.
"Why… am I congratulating you?" Mari blinked. "Actually yeah, that's a good question… it's not like you nee—"
"No," the Shadow King huffed. "Why Harvard?"
The girl narrowed her eyes in confusion. "Why not?"
"What are you going to say to your… friends?"
Mari rolled her eyes. "I'm not telling them anything unless they ask."
"Lying by omission?"
"What? No, I—"
They were interrupted the door sliding open. The two reverted back to their regular selves, ignoring each other. He could feel her anger boil over as she violently placed her travel mug against the desk, shooting him a glance that only made the Shadow King pretend he was not affected by the slightest bit.
By the afternoon, Mari sat with her arms crossed obviously still annoyed by the Ootori. He hadn't even done anything during the class to annoy her, much less even say a word. But here she was, scowling at him for no reason. He rolled his eyes at her, unamused by her immaturity.
The teenage girl angrily threw a pair of nitrile gloves at him for their last lab of their high school years. He caught them coolly, slipping them onto his fingertips with ease.
"I was just trying to make small talk," the Ootori tried to explain himself from the morning.
"Your small talk is always an attack on my character and my self-worth," Mari grumbled. She flipped open the lab manual with the prelab already finished. She skimmed over the instructions and began gathering the glassware required, ignoring his presence and continuing on with her usual routine of beginning the experiment.
Kyouya easily caught onto her pace, quickly moving onto the next step by weighing out reagents. The two sat patiently for their experiment to react, casually sitting on the bench stools and observing carefully.
"You know, if you wanted to talk – you could just do it normally," Mari mumbled.
"You're the one who refuses to converse," the Ootori whispered back.
"I refuse to talk with someone who thinks my friendships are based on pure lies," the girl coldly replied. "What's your problem anyway? Do you hate my friends because they're not on the same level of social standing?"
The Ootori rolled his eyes. "No."
"Then why do you keep reminding me that I don't deserve to be friends with them?" she frowned. "They are such wonderful and kind people to me. And I…" Mari trailed off. "Maybe I do feel guilty that I have opportunities that they may not ever be able to experience." Kyouya always seemed to remind her that she was privileged beyond what her friends could ever imagine. Mari was unsure what to do with all of the privilege that she held except to keep quiet about it, a stark difference from the rest of the elite population of the school.
He left the conversation at that. Why did he feel so guilty? He watched as the girl took apart her ponytail at the end of class and hung her oversized lab coat on the hook. She grabbed her textbook and her notebooks, only to roughly stuff it into her backpack. It made him cringe at her lack of care towards her belongings.
The Ootori wondered why it mattered that he always managed to set off her fuse. It was good, right? Finding her weaknesses. Attacking at where it hurt the most. But she wasn't the enemy – she never was a rival to begin with. Not with her lacklustre lineage, her boring career as a musician, or her academic record.
Mari rubbed him the wrong way because she too, attacked him in ways he didn't realize would hurt. Kyouya wondered how much longer it would take for her to notice that she held the same power as he did to her.
"Am I a bad person?" Mari asked.
"Why do you think so?"
The teenager fidgeted with the sleeve of her sweater.
"I feel guilty," the girl sighed. "And the feeling never goes away. I feel like I've always done something wrong. I'm letting people down."
"Who are you letting down?"
Mari sighed. "Louise. My friends. My family."
"Let's try to break down each group. Why Louise?"
The teenager shrugged. "Obvious reasons, right? I'll never know if I was the cause. Or if I wasn't enough to save her. Zero-sum game on that one. I'll carry that for the rest of my life, I suppose."
The counsellor nodded. They had talked about that for hours on end. Mari was slow to accept the reality of the sudden death and the teenager made strides in progress in talking about Louise. The therapist decided not to delve into that topic for too long.
"And your friends?"
"I come from a lot of privilege," the girl looked out the window, almost ashamed to say the word. "My friends don't know that. But I am guilty for being unable to share the same opportunities that I have with them. Like going overseas for university." A headache formed when she thought of the words that the Ootori said in the morning. Mari rubbed her temples in an attempt to soothe the pressure building in her skull.
"I'll miss them, a lot. I don't know if they'll be mad at me for... everything, really. Not telling them that I was privileged. Not telling them that I'll leave in a few months time. I wonder if they'll accept me for who I am."
"You seem to be under a lot of stress," the counsellor noted. "Were you thinking of telling your friends about it?"
Mari shrugged. "I don't know what would be the right thing to do."
"Mari," the adult's voice was soothing. "Do what you feel is right. You will bear whatever consequences that follow. You are a capable young woman and you certainly can handle what comes your way."
"Well, I'm glad one person thinks so," the teenager sarcastically replied.
"What do you mean?"
The teenager looked at the adult who she had grown to open up to since the beginning of the academic term. The counsellor knew her well enough than most adults, or really, more than anyone at this point.
"I feel like I'll never amount to much," Mari admitted. "Not that my family has many expectations for me to begin with but… as a pianist, at least that was my defining quality. Kanda is the heir. My sister Yuki is the baby of the family."
"Was your family disappointed that you stopped playing?"
The former pianist blinked. "I don't think they know."
"Why not?"
Mari chuckled. "Well, I never told them. They never asked. We're on a need-to-know basis."
"Does that bother you?"
"Not really," the teenager admitted. "I like the freedom of having no expectations. But I wonder if… I was supposed to… honour the family, somehow. Like the rest of my peers, I guess. Strange that I'm not on the same boat as them, you know?"
"Well, what expectations do you have for yourself?" the counsellor shifted the topic.
The teenager shook her head.
"I have no idea."
The cold rain was an indication that the snow was soon to melt and that the trees would begin to bud. Another school year in passing, only this time – Mari would never have to return back. She walked the halls after her counselling session in reminiscence, remembering the small little corners that her friends used to eat lunch at. They moved every year to appreciate different parts of the school.
Mari hoisted open her umbrella against the rain, waiting for her ride as per usual. Her slim fingers tried to push open the apparatus, only to break the plastic handle of the device. Mari sighed to herself. Whatever, she'll wear her hood. It was only a few more minutes of waiting, after all.
The pitter pattering of the rain against her hooded head subsided when a shadow casted over her head. All Mari could see was the blue blazer that fitted their shoulder, their long arm holding the large umbrella over the two of them. She lifted her head up in surprise, noting the Ootori whose right shoulder was getting wet.
"You don't have to," Mari softly told him. "Chiaki-san will be around in a few minutes, I think. A little rain won't hurt anyone."
"I don't want you getting sick," the Ootori muttered. "We still share that lab bench."
The former pianist rolled her eyes. Of course, the Ootori would be looking out for himself.
"We did our last lab today. You don't ever have to see me again."
"We're going to the same university," Kyouya pointed out.
"Different programs," Mari shrugged. "Campus is large. We'll probably have different social circles too, you know."
"What program?"
"Undeclared," Mari murmured. "Something in the sciences, maybe. Business for you, I guess."
The Ootori narrowed his eyes.
"I could also be in the sciences," he reminded.
"Yeah, but – you'd have to see my face so… hard pass for you right?" Mari shrugged.
"I mean, I've survived this long…" Kyouya grumbled. He glanced over at her. She was dressed in her regular outfit, baggy sweater with jeans. Black running shoes. Backpack slung over one shoulder. Hair tied in a loose ponytail. Mari certainly did not dress to impress. He had seen her when she did dress like a woman of higher class – and it was a stark difference.
They let the silence settle in. A comfortable one, for the first time in who knew how long.
"You were a good lab partner," she admitted. "Thanks for being tolerable when I needed it the most."
"It's mutual," the Ootori responded. After a few minutes of contemplating, Kyouya quickly spat out the words. "I'm sorry."
Mari blinked. It would be too much for him to ask him to repeat his last sentence. She turned to look at him, and he shifted his gaze uncomfortably away from her. She wanted to ask what for. But Mari knew better than to dig deeper. It was hard enough for him to apologize, and Mari gave him the benefit of assuming that he was apologizing for every dumb thing he had said to her over the years.
The girl sighed. "For someone as incredibly smart as you are on paper, you really are horrific at emotional intelligence."
The Ootori opened his mouth to argue, but a vehicle pulled up to the curb. He recognized it as Mari's car. He did the gentlemanly thing and opened the door for her which only earned him a look of confusion. She nodded in thanks and stepped into the car.
"Why can't you be more like this?" Mari poked her head out before shutting the door, her eyes softened when she looked up at him. It took him by surprise. Kyouya quickly reverted back to his usual self before he showed any more weakness.
"Like what?" The Ootori narrowed his eyes.
Mari rolled her eyes and shut the car door, shaking her head. He was such an idiot.
"Mari, what about you?"
Her friends looked at her with excitement. They were all discussing their future plans at Toudai and Mari blinked. This was a good as time as any.
"I… I'm going overseas," she shyly admitted. Mari pulled up the admissions email on her phone and slid it over the table they all ate lunch at.
Her friends stared at the email wide-eyed. At first in disbelief, and then everything seemed to sink in. Mari was an intelligent girl. No one ever questioned that.
"You're going to America?"
Mari nodded.
"Did you apply for scholarships?"
Mari nodded again. It wasn't enough to cover all of tuition, but it was helpful to a degree. Was this a good time to break it to her friends that she was rich? She wanted to just blurt it out.
"That's amazing, Mari!" Everyone congratulated her. "We should all go celebrate!"
The girl shook her head. "No, it's fine, really. No need for anything over the top, guys. Everyone made it to their program of choice. You are all amazing!"
Her friends laughed. "When did Harvard ever become your program of choice?"
The teenager shrugged. "My brother went there."
"You have a brother?"
Mari blinked. "Oh." She didn't realize she never mentioned that. "I have a sister too."
"Huh?"
"Yeah… my family is… pretty affluent.." She admitted. Mari looked at each of her friends cautiously, afraid to find all of them upset for keeping such a secret from them.
"Huh," Misaki tilted her head and looked at Mari. "You know, you don't act like them."
"Hm?" Mari raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
"Well, you…" Aki pointed at Mari's outfit. "You really dress like you've rolled out of bed." Everyone else in their friend group tried to at least look put together. "And you hardly ever talk about the same things they talk about."
"Yeah," Kiyoko agreed. "Don't you have a business to inherit?"
"Well, no. It's my brother's," Mari explained. Her friends nodded in understanding. "And I'm on a scholarship for music."
"Oh," Aki laughed. "Gosh, and this whole time we all just thought you were on a scholarship for science!"
Mari smiled. "Yeah. I'm a pianist. I used to play at the Tokyo Symphony Orchestra over the summer."
"Oh!" Misaki excitedly chirped up. "That make sense now! That was your summer job! Ah, I would've loved to see you perform! How come you never told us anything?"
Mari shook her head. "I thought… it was too late to tell you the truth… I mean, we all just ended up as friends by proximity. No one really asked. No one seemed to realize… that, well, I was actually just as spoiled as everyone else here."
Aki shook her head in disagreement. "No, you're far from these dimwits." Everyone laughed.
"Yeah, Mari. You're still our friend, you'll always be."
Mari breathed a sigh of relief.
"I'm going to miss all of you."
Kyouya could hear them laughing in the corner of their homeroom class. Mari laughed along with them, and for a while he always thought that they were annoying. But over the past year, he hardly saw Mari laugh until now. He wondered what changed.
Perhaps it was the stress of the academic year. Their graduation ceremony was within a month. Finals were to begin in a few days. He scrolled through his inbox.
From: Mari Takuya
Subject: Lab #10 Final Copy
See attached.
Good luck on your finals.
Mari
Her messages were efficient. But then again, Kyouya was likely the last person she ever wanted to converse with given their track record. Kyouya opened up the message again and typed out a reply.
You too.
That seemed like a measly response. He pressed the backspace button.
Best of luck.
He tried again.
Thank you. You too.
Still didn't seem right.
He wondered why it was so difficult to craft a stupid email to her. It seemed like the polite thing to do. But it was obvious that she didn't care about him, especially as she laughed with her own group of commoner friends. Why did it matter to him so much? Her opinion of him was insignificant. Not when she had no merit to him.
Kyouya hit the delete button.
He waited a few minutes before going back into the Trash folder and dragging her email back into his inbox.
Why was he so damn stupid?
Graduation was bittersweet as the whole club gathered to wish Tamaki and Kyouya the best. Pictures were taken. Shenanigans ensued. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom, with petals falling gently with the wind. It was a beautiful day of joy.
Kyouya looked over the crowd to find Mari and her friends taking photos with their gowns. Mari voluntarily took photos for her friends and their respective families. Not one member of her own family seemed to be present. He could relate. Fuyumi was probably the only one who would have shown up, but she had to go to an event with her husband overseas.
The Ootori slipped away from his friends and approached Mari when she was finally left alone. She was in the midst of waving her goodbye to her friend Misaki, after politely denying their invitation to eat with her family to celebrate the end of their high school years.
"Where's your family?" Kyouya asked. Mari jumped in shock, losing balance on her platform heels. The Ootori quickly reached out to grab her by the arm, his other hand balancing on her waist naturally. He could smell the whiff of her shampoo as her curled hair swayed with the rest of her body.
Mari looked up at him and narrowed her eyes.
"Let go of me," she ordered. The Shadow King did as told, gently loosening his grip on her body. Mari huffed and straightened herself out.
"Do you enjoy seeing everyone jump in fear?" the girl crossed her arms.
Kyouya perched up his glasses. "It was not my intent."
"God, even on the very last day of Ouran – you still manage to be annoying," Mari grumbled. She turned around and began walking towards the building, unzipping the graduation gown and revealed a white dress that she wore beneath. It was perfect for the spring.
Kyouya was quick to catch up with the girl, especially given the slow pace she walked with her heels. Mari noticed his presence beside her this time and rolled her eyes at him.
"It's not like your family is here, either," she muttered. "Middle child, remember? Always forgotten."
"You sound disappointed," the Ootori noted.
"I'm not," Mari responded, almost a little too quickly.
"Are you sure?"
The girl stopped walking and turned to him.
"Like you can be so high and mighty because you're the Shadow King who is cold and aloof," Her voice was sharp. "Yeah. I'm a little disappointed because I had to take photos for all my friends and their own respective families. I have feelings too and unlike you, I can admit to them."
Mari threw the gown over her arm and began walking again, leaving Kyouya behind. The Ootori blinked. He didn't think she would be so upset. He caught up to her again, this time also taking off his gown. He was dressed in a casual tie and white dress shirt.
"Sorry," he softly said.
Mari shot him a glare. It only lasted 5 seconds at most before she sighed and shook her head. God, how she wished to just stay mad at him forever but she was too weak. Mari knew better than to take his words to be sincere and still, the look in his eyes just couldn't stop her from relenting.
"You're so annoying," Mari grumbled. "Like, truly the most annoying thing about this school. Besides the frilly yellow dresses that I've had to stare at over the entire course of the academy."
The Ootori smirked. "So, you'd prefer staring at me?"
The girl threw her gown at the boy in retaliation. He caught it just in time, flinching at her sudden attack. Mari frowned at him and darted her eyes towards the office that took back their graduation gowns. The Ootori rolled his eyes and did her the favour of returning both their gowns in apology.
Mari waited quietly, her back against one of the large Grecian pillars that upheld the academy. She looked nice today, with her off-shoulder lace dress that pinched her waist. The fabric weaned off into an A-line skirt that stopped just before her knees. Mari tied her curled hair back into a low ponytail while she waited for him.
"Don't you have plans with the Host Club?" she asked him as he came closer.
Kyouya shrugged. "There's a dinner later. Tamaki booked a place at some commoner restaurant that serves toro."
Mari chuckled. "Haruhi likes toro? That's cute."
Kyouya rolled his eyes, pretending not to enjoy seeing the smile on her face. "Commoner taste."
"I like toro," the girl muttered, unamused by his backhanded comment. "Commoner things are great, you know."
"Wouldn't you prefer caviar?" Kyouya suggested.
Mari frowned in disgust. "Just because it's expensive doesn't always mean it's good. Salty fish eggs are just overrated."
"Your tastes aren't refined, I see," the Ootori rolled his eyes.
Mari crossed her arms and rolled her eyes at him. "This is why you're insufferable."
"I'm merely speaking the truth," Kyouya pointed out.
"Refinement isn't defined by expensive taste," Mari pointed out. "Refinement is the ability to appreciate the details in everything."
Kyouya blinked. He couldn't argue against that. She looked at him as though she expected a response, one that would get her riled up enough to walk away. But it never came. And she never made any comment about his speechlessness, even though they both knew it should have been coming.
Mari opened her mouth to speak but closed it after giving it a little more thought.
"What?" the Ootori narrowed his eyes. He was expecting something snarky to come out of her mouth.
"Nothing," Mari shrugged. "Not important."
"Not much of what you say is important—"
"And yet you still listen," Mari smirked. "Why is that?"
Kyouya rolled his eyes, trying to mask his lack of response.
"Do I humour you?" the girl wondered. "I suppose I'm just another form of amusement to you," she brushed off. Mari looked to him for confirmation, but the Ootori only blinked at her.
She wasn't just a form of amusement. He had to admit that he enjoyed her company over the past year as his lab partner. They were abrasive, chaotic, and an absolute worst nightmare for anyone to listen to with their constant bickering. And yet somehow, over the months – he had eroded down to feel impressed by the girl's academic track record.
He respected her.
"Do you think we'll ever cross paths?" Mari changed the topic before Kyouya could even tell her what he truly thought of her.
The Ootori perched up his glasses. "I suppose we would." They were heading to the same university, after all.
Mari chuckled. "I guess this is the part where you tell me to steer clear of you, hm." She looked away from him, crossing her arms. She imagined what life would be like over in America. The culture must have been so different from their own. How nice it would be to have... a friend, she thought to herself. But they were far from friends. Acquaintances at best, if anything.
Kyouya wanted to shake his head. But that would have been an admittance of weakness and he knew better than that. His pride refused to let him succumb to such a level.
"It's fine," she shrugged. "I understand. Can't really be seen with a peasant," Mari rolled her eyes.
"You aren't a peasant."
"I just look like one," she finished his thought for him.
"No," Kyouya interjected. "Not today."
Her hair fell loosely to frame her face, curled just slightly. Her large eyes accentuated by a coat of mascara and sharp eyeliner. Her cheekbones were highlighted underneath the sun, the hollows of her cheeks sharply defined. Mari looked fit to play the part of a socialite only a handful of times that he could remember. Her collarbones were sharp as she shifted her arms to cross more comfortably. Her lips were coloured a deep maroon colour balancing the rest of her plain faced makeup.
Mari took a moment to take in his words.
"Was that a compliment from Hades?" Mari feigned shock, placing a hand over her heart.
"Why am I Hades?" Kyouya grumbled while he narrowed his eyes at her.
"Being a Shadow King is much too lame," the teenager explained. "If you truly wanted to be great, why not take the title of being the King of the Underworld?"
"Then who would be Persephone?" Kyouya raised an eyebrow.
"Renge?" Mari smirked. "She is your fiancée," she teased. It was the talk of the school last year and Mari knew how much the Ootori loved being associated with the young lady.
Kyouya exhaled, closing his eyes as he pinched his nose. "I would take anyone else to be Persephone – even you."
"You'd have to kidnap me, as per the legend. I don't think I'd be as easy as Renge to kidnap. She would just fall into your arms," Mari pointed out.
"Then it wouldn't be kidnapping, Mari. Kidnapping would imply that I would take someone against their will. Renge would come along if I said we were going to a landfill."
"You can't kidnap me," she shook her head.
"I have a whole private police force," the Ootori deadpanned. "I certainly could."
"Is that a threat?" Mari narrowed her eyes.
"You started it," Kyouya shrugged.
Her mouth gaped at how childish he could be sometimes. She shut her mouth instead and muttered something about how ridiculously rich he was. The tension slowly dissipated as the two took a walk through the courtyard of Ouran, likely for the last time.
"it would be nice though," Mari softly told him. "To have someone you'd know… new school, new people, new country… it's a lot."
"Are you afraid?" the Ootori taunted.
Mari shook her head. "I'm excited, mostly."
"Mostly?" he repeated.
"You would be lying if you said you weren't apprehensive about being so far away from home," Mari rolled her eyes. "As if you have everything sorted out already. Where are you living? What classes are you taking? Have you gotten your visa paperwork done?"
"It's just all administrative things," the Ootori reasoned. "Not difficult. Just tedious."
Mari blinked. "Yeah, sure. I mean, you're not wrong there. Maybe I'm just more worried about the cultural barrier and fitting in."
"Why does it matter?"
Mari tilted her head at him in confusion. "For someone who is heavily reliant on their network, wouldn't you think fitting in would be a good step to take for business connections?"
The Ootori had to admit that the girl had a point. "But you're there to study. Not to make friends."
The girl raised an eyebrow at him. "Of course. It would be a lonely 4 years without any company though. Aren't we all evolutionary creatures that survive better with a herd than on our own? It's just a fact." Mari could have gone without her friends at Ouran, but it sure would have been a bleak journey. She made memories in the courtyard as she ate lunch beneath the gazebo with her friends. Mari would always remember how the light flitted through the stained windows in the library, with all the dust particles that settled over the books.
The pair navigated their way through the maze, letting the tall hedges hide them away from the rest of the crowds that had gathered from the ceremony. Kyouya let Mari set the pace, giving her room to balance and take comfortable strides with her heels. He trailed behind her slightly.
"You must think I'm naïve," Mari turned to lock eyes with him over her bare shoulder. She smiled at him. Kyouya blinked at the sight. A part of him didn't know what to do. He froze immediately, standing on the gravel. Mari stopped along with him, not looking where she was going ahead of her.
Mari found herself in front of the green shrub, far too close for comfort. A wasp flew right in front of her causing her to tip her whole body backwards to avoid the insect. A strong hand held her upright before she could fall over. He caught her for the second time of the day. This was becoming a habit he was unsure how he felt about.
Now he became too close for comfort.
Kyouya didn't know she had freckles on her cheeks. Her lips parted in surprise while her eyes widened when she realized how close he was. His hand naturally gravitated to her back when he noticed her falling against him. Mari stood to find her balance again, still too short to meet his eyes.
"I'm alright, thank you," Mari stuttered.
"Didn't seem like it," he removed his hand before Mari could comment on it. The girl crossed her arms at his response and huffed.
"A simple 'you're welcome' would have sufficed, you know."
"You're welcome," the Ootori repeated in a patronizing tone.
"Ugh," Mari groaned. "Maybe it's best we never cross paths at university."
"Not unlikely," the Ootori shrugged. "Best of luck to you, Mari."
She blinked. Well, perhaps that was the most she would ever get out of the Ootori after a year of academic rivalry.
"You too," Mari held out her hand. A truce.
Kyouya stared at the gesture and gripped her hand in his usual business fashion.
"And to you," he reluctantly responded.
He still had so many unanswered questions for her. But instead, he watched as she turned from him to exit the maze with impeccable posture. Her ponytail waved from side to side as her heels clacked against the pavement.
It never made sense to him why his heart skipped a beat watching her sneak a glance back at him. Mari smiled coyly and gave a small wave goodbye.
