'Cause you know the truth hurts
But secrets kill
Can't help thinkin' that I love it still
Still here, there must be something real
'Cause you know the good die young
But so did this
And so it must be better than I think it is
Gimme those eyes it´s easy to forgive
- Hopeless
The first week went by without another disaster, fast but somehow dragging at the same time. My days always looked the same: get up early, take a shower after Marcus left the house, then breakfast at the headquarters. After doing the dishes, we´d get our assignment for the day, the boys performing physically more demanding tasks like helping a member build a new house or shelter for the factionless while we girls helped the woman do their laundry in huge tubs, rubbing until our hands were raw or patching up clothes until my fingers were bleeding. At least I learned now how to sew.
My favorite task by far was watching the little children when their parents had to leave. Of course, I liked the little ones most, the toddlers and infants who were still child enough to be allowed to laugh and cry – not like the older ones that liked to stare at walls for fun.
They honestly frightened me.
After lunch came the time I dreaded most, hurrying back to the house, having less than an hour to make sure it was immaculate before reporting to Marcus´ office where I served the worst part of my punishment – spending time with him.
Luckily, we weren't alone most of the time, the other members of the council sitting together with him in a slightly larger conference room while I was either taking notes or was sent away, the topic not meant for my ears. Every time this happened I was torn between the happiness of leaving the stifling room and regret that I wouldn't be able to hear what they were discussing.
Even when Marcus let me participate he sent me home over an hour earlier to prepare dinner, a huge disaster for someone who had never even laid hand on a spatula, claiming that he wanted to have at least one meal at home, with my company of course. This half an hour was the worst of the day, sitting opposite of him with no topic to talk about. I was relieved every time he dismissed me, letting me do the dishes before I was allowed to go to bed, staring up at the ceiling until sleep took me, completely exhausted from the day.
The next morning everything started again and again and again…
An endless, tiring circle of hard work and sleep.
But not today.
Today, it was Sunday and like all good stiffs, Marcus insisted I would accompany him to the early service, starting at 6 am followed by a big breakfast, which surprisingly for once included fresh fruits from the Amity farm.
The worship was strange, having never attended one, all the kneeling, standing up and reciting lines confused me and by the time it was over, I was literally starving. To my astonishment, Benjamin fit right in here, maybe a little too cheerful to be Abnegation but it seemed that the peace serum had finally worn off leaving him as happy but more conservative.
Susan and most of the other initiates were also here. I had neither spoken to her nor accepted her apology, my nature wasn't to forgive easily. Especially if her betrayal could have made me factionless – something I´m sure would have blown up my deal with Max.
Not wanting to appear as a loner, which I had never been, but also wary of the people around me I took a seat beside Benjamin who chatted lightly with the other boys mostly staying quiet, just enjoying the for once not tasteless fruit as I piled my plate with apples and strawberries.
I was barely finished when Marcus approached and told me to follow him. I complied an uneasy feeling in my guts, quietly fearing I had done something wrong again.
Turns out I hadn't.
It was worse.
Ushering me into the one car that was owned by abnegation, only a little notebook and pen in my hand we were chauffeured through the city, towards the hub where a leader meeting would be held as Marcus informed me gratefully. Staring at him, I felt myself pale. This wasn't a meeting more like my personal hell. Not even Andrew Prior´s comforting smile managed to make me feel calmer, my heartbeat racing uncomfortably in my chest.
Two leaders who condemned me to a life as an outcast, one who despised me so badly he kept me under his watch for 24/7 to make sure I didn't fuck his faction up and my Ex-boyfriend who I´d left without any warning before literally running away from him.
One week wasn't nearly enough to face him again.
But like always, I had no choice.
The driver held my door opened and I hesitated before catching Marcus agitated gaze, scrambling out of the vehicle almost tripping over the hem of my dress. Brushing it off, I didn't realize that Marcus had already stepped into the building not even bothering to wait up. Rolling my eyes, I followed him through the first story of the hub with quick steps the notepad securely tucked against my chest, doubling as a shield as I stepped into the room, keeping to the wall to not draw attention to myself.
But it didn't work as planned since I was the only person in the room that had absolutely nothing to do with being a leader of the five factions. And they knew too.
"Don´t mind my assistant. She´s just here to take notes." Marcus addressed the room lightly, thankfully drawing the attention away from my figure. I never really had a problem being the center of attention, dressed in my black uniform I basically reveled in it, blossoming, thriving, but somehow now I felt indefinitely small. If it was the grey sack I was wearing, I didn't know, the feeling of not being comfortable in my own skin so new, so raw that for the first time in my life I wished to have mastered the art of making myself disappear, to not be seen. I guess Marcus lectures were already working.
"Assistant? How… interesting." Jeanine stated, her icy blue eyes full of morbid curiosity and… satisfaction as she basically devoured my appearance, searching for something only she knew. Her forehead furrowed as she concentrated, pretending she didn't know exactly who I was. "Aren't you the Dauntless transfer?"
"Yes, ma'am." I gave her a tight smile, already tired of this make-believe. Not to mention that I despised her, the well-hidden threats behind the facts she had given me branded into my memory.
"Well… this year certainly was an interesting one, wasn't it?" Jeanine smiled, her lips curling up to show her abnormally white teeth. The gesture reminded of a snarling dog, not less threatening than one, too. "I myself, too, have found an assistant from the rows of our transfers. Caleb is doing well, Andrew. He is extraordinarily intelligent if you take into regard that he… didn't have the time to deepen his lessons in his former faction." The small pause wasn't because Jeanine didn't know to say, she just chose not to speak it out loud but we all knew what she implied. He must be smart despite coming from Abnegation. As if erudite had a monopole on being smart.
Bitch.
"Let´s just hope yours will be as accommodating, Marcus. She must be impeccable if you choose her to work for you."
"Quite the contrary, Jeanine." Marcus countered and I felt my expression slip for a moment, narrowing my eyes at him. "I just thought that it would be the perfect opportunity for her to learn more about our way of life since it seems to be quite hard for her still. Isn´t that right, Casey?"
Avoiding the one gaze that had rested on me since I stepped into the room, I slowly lifted my eyes from the floor and met Max´s eyes how merely raised one eyebrow at me, regarding my reaction closely. Faking a smile so they wouldn't see my gritted jaw, I looked over to my tormentor and bowed my head slightly.
"Of course."
"Great." Marcus clasped his hand in front of him, looking patronizingly at the people surrounding the huge, round table but all I could concentrate was the not-so-quiet huff leaving his chest before he got up from his seat, walking past me so close that I just had to move one finger forward to touch his black uniform. Balling them into fists, I refrained but inhaled deeply, his familiar aftershave easing the anxiety tightly stuck in my chest for the first time in over a week.
Eric was busying himself at the buffet that was lined up against one wall in case one of the leaders would get hungry or if the meeting should run longer than excepted. I had just gotten a glimpse of his face but it was enough to see that the bags under his eyes were more prominent than usual meaning he was either tired or hungover and knowing that the first weekend of initiation was always widely celebrated, I guessed it was the latter.
Dauntless parties were always the wildest and I asked myself if he found someone to take home – not that it was any of my business any longer, I just wondered if...
Lost in thought, the bowl shattering against the tiles had me flinch and I whirled around to stare at Eric who looked at the glass shards with disdain before his glinting eyes flitted from the mess to me and back. A clear demand I couldn't ignore.
Swallowing down my dismay for being treated like stuff I made my way over to him and crouched down to pick up the shards of glass. Eric remained standing beside me, his huge form towering over me, watching, observing.
Groveling to his feet had never been something I would have willingly done but here I was, in the middle of a situation I could have never even dreamed of, my new life.
By straightening up as soon as I had the glass in my hand I tried to keep what little was left of my dignity. Not that it felt as if I had any left but I had learned from early on that it was better to fake it than to admit weakness.
Raising my head to meet his gaze, I wasn't surprised that his was already resting on me, scrutinizing me from head to toe, not bothering to hide the disgust at what they called dress, making me all fidgety.
"Don´t look at me like that," I muttered, no longer able to keep eye contact. "I would say I know how I look but I haven't even seen a mirror in over a week, less been allowed to use it."
"Clearly." Was all he answered, voice curt but I thought to detect a hint of malicious glee at my misery as if he wanted to say 'I told you so'. Narrowing my eyes at him, my fists instantly tightened but a sharp prick had me open them again with the hiss, having forgotten all about the glass.
"Well, it´s not like you look any better," I remarked dryly, wiping away at the small cut in my hand that was oozing blood, the glass shards discarded into the trash can to my right. "Long night, huh?"
Even though I tried to sound uninterested the small, humorless huff leaving his chest told me I had failed. But instead of poking fun at me, like he usually would he just grabbed a sandwich and stared at it before scrunching up his face in disgust, throwing it back on the platter.
"You know how we Dauntless are. No need to sleep when there´s booze… or someone who´s willing to warm your bed."
While he didn't even spare me a glance, I stared at with raised eyebrows, incredulous of his audacity. I knew it was his way to cope… but rubbing it into my face that he hadn't even bothered to wait one week until he took the nearest skank into his bed – it hurt.
Shaking my head at him, the chuckle leaving my mouth was bitter, rivaling the jealousy bubbling in my chest.
"God… you´re such an asshole."
This got his attention. Whipping his head towards me, Eric´s eyes narrowed into slips and he took a threatening step forward, his next words equally chilling and riling me up, something only he ever managed.
"What was that, stiff?"
"Go fuck yourself," Cocking my head, I plastered a sarcastic smile on my face to hide the burning in the back of my throat. The vein on his neck started pulsing dangerously as I added a sarcastic "Sir".
With one big step, he was right in front of me, his fingers digging into the flesh of my arm, no doubt leaving bruises as he stared down at me with fire-blazing eyes into my defiant ones. Riling Eric up had always been a favorite past time of mine but I knew when his cold eyes started to light up like a flame, or more likely an inferno, you had gone too far.
Just where I wanted him after he refused to even look at me.
"Watch yourself, Casey." He hissed, his voice venomous, his grip like a vice tightening further. "Or I will do it for you."
Before I could respond, a throat clearing beside us had me rushing back but Eric was unfazed as always, our close proximity posing no obvious problem as he turned to face Marcus, lazily raising one eyebrow.
"Is there a problem here?"
"No, Sir." Averting my eyes to the floor I quickly yanked my arm out of Eric´s grasp, which he allowed, too busy studying my sudden change in behavior.
"Except –" Eric started and my head whipped towards him in panic, the sinking feeling in my guts growing as I met his once again emotionless eyes, sure that whatever he would say would cause my certain doom, a misstep this big nothing Marcus would overlook. When he noticed the pleading expression on my face, he didn't show just turned towards Marcus, voice cold as he went on. "She won´t be able to pick up all the glass shards without a dustpan and brush. You should tell her where she gets these things because I don´t give a shit."
While speaking the first part, his gaze flitted from Marcus to me and back but to show that he really didn't care, he started to walk away, mumbling over his shoulder while I stayed put, following him with my eyes as he took his seat right beside Max who, which I now realized, had been watching us the whole time.
"Third door to the right. Hurry up, we need someone who takes notes." Was all Marcus said before he too made his way towards the large table. Turning around, I scrunched my face up, the obedience I had to display profoundly repugnant but like the good little stiff I had to be now, I did just as he said.
Taking a second to just breathe before I had to enter the conference room again, I wondered what wrong I had done to deserve not only Eric´s hate but also Marcus´ hovering over my every move like a hawk ready to strike.
After everything was clean, I took a seat a little away from the table, notebook in hand keeping the minutes, scribbling down every word of unnecessary banter coming from their mouth. But whatever topics were being discussed bypassed me because Eric did not once look in my direction. Not even when they closed up and the Dauntless had to walk by me to get to the door, his eyes not straying once.
That´s when I knew it… I had lost him.
In Marcus Eaton´s house was a door that was always locked. It was grey, almost dull just like every other one in this faction, not letting on that there could be something hidden behind it that could change the fate of our whole city. This totally unassuming piece of wood could possibly be the gates of hell, to my own, personal hell.
It was the door of Marcus Eaton´s study.
That night, after my disastrous run-in with Eric, I decided to not give a fuck anymore. Marcus was gone, out to eat at some council members house, the bland one-course meal no doubt prepared by another perfect little housewife. There seemed to be too much of them here.
Knowing this was my chance, Marcus gone for the night without the threat of him suddenly arriving like he usually did throughout the day, most likely to check up on me.
But not tonight.
Tonight Marcus would spend wholly at Alice Brewster´s house, not coming back before eleven pm which he told me with a stern face when he ordered me to cut up fruit for him to take as a present. After all, he had a reputation to uphold.
And that meant I had to stay home.
It didn't bother me in the slightest to spend one of my nights away from him, finally able to relax a little in a house where I had to tiptoe around but preparing stuff for a party I wasn't invited to? That sucked.
Ultimately, I decided to get rid of Marcus was worth to spend half an hour arranging wrinkly apple slices, my mood only getting better the closer his departure came.
And the best thing about it wasn't my temporary freedom. After grabbing a folder from his desk, Marcus had to hurry to not arrive late and make a bad impression – and forgot to lock the door in the process.
After he was gone and I made my way to my room, quietly humming to myself as I conquered the steps, only sparing the damn door a glance until I realized it was ajar. Immediately my heart rate spiked and I looked around widely, almost anticipating that Marcus came back solely to lock the door. But he didn't.
Standing there with a pounding heart, I contemplated what to do even though there was no doubt what I must do. Frozen on my spot, I listened closely, suddenly more than paranoid, highly aware of my surroundings. But after several minutes of utter silence, I realized that this wasn't a trap – it was the possibility I hadn't dared to dream of.
Hurrying into my room to retrieve the little notebook Marcus gave me, I hesitated in front of the door, just for a split second imagining what may lie behind it, my fantasy wreaking havoc. Pushing open the door with one burst of confidence, I expected rows upon rows of shelves, all full of binders containing every secret one should know about abnegation, maybe even a few pictures hanging on the wall – but nothing. Just an old, sturdy desk with a few binders and a chair.
Everything you would expect from abnegations leader.
Good for him, bad for me.
Stepping into the room, I stopped in front of the desk picking up one of the folders, carefully remembering just how they had sat there. Skimming through it, I realized it contained information of current members, a few of the pictures familiar. Since it wasn't what I was searching for, I grabbed the next one and interestedly thumbed through the pages. It contained the people who deflected in the last five years, judging by the dates of birth. I just wanted to put it down when I stumbled over the information of someone I knew.
Mouth hanging open, I stared at Four´s profile not believing what I was seeing.
Sure, I knew he was from Abnegation… but that he was Marcus´ son?!
Still outraged, I clasped a hand over my mouth, the gnarly eighteen-year-old with the pained eyes such a far cry from the warrior I came to know, even just by passing him in the pit. But now I realized he had always looked as if the weight of the whole world rested on his shoulders and living with Marcus, his every demand and constantly worsening mood, I developed a new found understanding for him.
Maybe Eric wasn't as right about him as he thought to be…
Shaking my head, I tried clearing my thoughts from everything unimportant to my mission because if I failed, there might not be a faction system to come home to after all. Gulping heavily, the image of dauntless raiding the streets, pushing Abnegation members to the ground, I alongside them, had a shiver racking my spine and I hurriedly grabbed the next folder, all breath leaving my body as I realized it was what I´ve been searching for.
Numbers.
So many numbers.
Whipping my notebook out, I started copying them to the T, making sure I got them all right to avoid unnecessary conflict. I wrote down over five pages filled with stocktaking from food to bales of cloth, cement to give the factionless workers to repair the streets, to the amount of wood we stocked to make furniture, all the while hearing Jeanine Matthew´s cold voice speaking into my ear as if she was right behind me.
"You see, dear Casey," Jeanine started, trying to fool me with her inviting expression that was just supposed to hide the real threats she spoke as she sat there on the couch with perfect composure, hands folded in her lap. As if she wasn't talking about destroying our whole system. "the abnegation aren't as selfless as they want us to believe. No, not at all." Ruefully she shook her head. "Not only do they hoard supplies that are vital for the thriving of our city, they also try to undermine our authority, claiming they are the most suited faction to run our government just because they are not corrupt. But they are, oh they are."
"That might be…" I relented a little confused as to why she was telling me this. Everyone knew erudite hated abnegation and that the loathing was mutual, not even her accusations were new to me I just didn't understand why she told me that. "but what has that to do with me? I´m neither erudite, nor abnegation so, no disrespect, ma'am, but… it has nothing to do with me." Speaking carefully to not offend her, I cast a quick glance at Max who sat there emotionless, just seizing me up.
"That´s where you are wrong, Casey," Jeanine exclaimed, the maniac expression slowly starting to frighten me. "We are all affected by this, we will all be involved, you maybe more than others but nonetheless. Because hoarding vital supplies and therefore withholding them from others that need them most is an act of war Casey. And war there will be if you don´t help us to diffuse the situation.
That´s why you will help us, functioning as our eyes and ears. You, Casey, are the key to everything."
Shivering, I remembered everything. How her icy eyes burned into mine with malicious intent, promising agony if I didn't follow her orders.
Or how her eyebrows had shut up when I decided to be brave, stand up for myself and dared to interrupt her, telling her in kinder words that she was bat-shit crazy and that there was no way I would get out of this as a grey. Or how Max in not so subtle words told me that if I went against their orders, I wouldn't even make it back into the compound, his eyes burning into mine, promising that he would keep his words.
For the way to our compound is dark and full of terrors.
Closing my eyes for a moment, I tried to chase these haunting images away, realizing that I was done writing down numbers. Thumbing through the last folder, just to make sure I didn't miss anything, I came across my own initiation class, greedily burning the information into my mind.
I found out that Susan, the traitor had a brother – a twin to be exact – who deflected. Maybe he couldn't stand her traitorous ways?
Chuckling over my bad joke, I went on.
It seemed that Jacob´s mother died when he was a little child, leaving him with an older sister that was still here and a father that had to raise them on his own.
Benjamin, the Amity transfer had five siblings, while Jael´s father had been made factionless after he committed a crime that wasn't listed in here.
The rest of them were fairly normal, no more juicy details and I decided to not try my luck any further, stacking the folders in the right order.
The one about us initiates at the bottom, then the stokeholds followed by the ones who deflected and lastly the current members.
Making sure everything was in their place, I grabbed notepad and pencil, closing the door behind me as I left the room. My mind reeling with thoughts, I let myself fall onto the bed, suddenly not able to stop wondering if this was Four´s old room he had counted the days until he could leave, just like I did.
If he laid in this bed, weary of the powerful man he shared the house with, as he stared at the ceiling wishing to be anywhere but here.
If he had things that were considered luxury somewhere hidden in this room, in a hiding place…
Bolting upright, my eyes flew wide open and I scampered from the bed, knowing I had to be right. No teenage boy would live like this – not at least without somewhere to hide things like chocolate or… porn magazines. Scrunching up my face, I imagined the woman Four must have found attractive. Maybe abnegation had a special edition of the calendar they made with dauntless woman – just in stiff style.
Maybe the women on their showed their ankles – how scandalous!
Cackling to myself, I couldn't decide if Four jacking off to feet was disgusting or funny as I made my way through the room, careful of the sound changing when I knocked on the walls. Luckily, I thought of an appropriate hiding place before Marcus came back, the knocking surely would have told him that I was up to something. I didn't find anything behind the walls but as I stepped up to the small window the change in sound of the floor creaking had me on my knees faster than ever and I crawled around, searching for a small indent or somewhere where the pattern of wood planks was disrupted.
And I found it.
Guiding my nail under it, I pulled the small slat out, revealing a hollow that was maybe 7 inches wide, 25 long and 10 deep – the perfect place to hide something where even the possession of books was a crime. Blowing the dust away, I realized that Tobias had forgotten something. Slowly reaching inside, I gripped the blue figure and pulled it out, revealing a beautiful glass sculpture formed like a dolphin rising from the waters.
Brushing the dust away, I traced ever line with my finger finding tranquility and inner calmness just knowing that there was someone who most likely felt the same emotions, sitting in the exact the same place I was now.
Knowing he had made it out, meant I could too.
It gave me hope.
Reluctantly, I put the stunning sculpture back into the confinements of its concrete grave trying to hide its beauty from the rest of the world – not unlike the whole faction here did it with its members.
But from now on, it wouldn't be alone.
Folding the five pages I had managed to copy, I made a make-shift envelope to protect them from the dust before placing it inside and putting the plank back into its place.
When I laid in bed twenty minutes later, staring at the dark ceiling, waiting for Marcus to come home, my mind still reeled with all the intel it has gotten, Four being on the front of all my thoughts. Or maybe I should call him Tobias from now on, living in his childhood bedroom somehow made all of it way more intimate – way more than I would have liked.
Even though I agreed with Eric, I was now asking myself if he wasn't right about everything. Four survived living like this for eighteen years while I was going crazy after one week and that earned him in some strange and twisted way my respect.
Closing my eyes, I realized that the only way I would get out of here was to enmesh myself deeper – but only so deep I could pull myself out of the time had come.
And I intended just that.
A few days after my successful mission I found myself alone in the kitchen – with Susan. We had both been selected to prepare food we´d hand out to the factionless later, some sort of curry consisting of whatever vegetable and little of meat we had, sliced and mixed together.
Though she had tried talking to me a few times since that night, I had always shut her down. Maybe I was too proud, too conceited, but who lost my trust and respect had lost it forever. With no exception.
Scrunching up my face in disgust, I continued turning the minced meat until the red turned brown, somehow being nauseous from the sight alone like I had been a lot of times over the last week. As if my body was rejecting the unfamiliar diet.
Paired with insomnia caused by a hauntingly quiet house and the seemingly endless tiring labor had my mood drop low. The mere thought of choking down another steamed piece of broccoli had my mouth water in the most disgusting way.
Pushing all these thoughts away, I almost managed to get my gag reflex under control. That was until a cloud of steam from the pan I was standing over hit me right in the face, the smell of grease and half-raw meat finally tipping me over the edge.
Not hesitating a second, I let the spatula fall and burst through the door towards the community bathroom, not paying Susan´s calls for me any mind as I fell to my knees and threw up into the toilet.
Though I hadn't eaten much these last few days, it felt like I gagged forever, dry-heaves shaking my body painfully preventing me from doing anything against the hands laying themselves on my shoulder, heavenly cold hands brushing the hair out of my face that was coated in a small sheen of sweat.
The urge to rid my body of the undigested food only slowly subsided after several minutes and the moment I felt like I didn't have anything left inside me, I slowly sank back on my calves, taking in a few deep breaths of air, eyes closed in agony.
"Casey, are you alright?" Came a soft voice from behind, Susan's hands still resting on my shoulders. I shrugged them off.
"Leave me alone." My voice was hoarse, throat sore from the acid leaving a putrid taste in my mouth. Leaning forward, I spit into the toilet to rid myself of it.
"Casey, please…" Rolling my eyes weakly, I ignored her pleading and slowly got up, swaying slightly. Her hands were instantly on me with the intent of preventing me from falling but I moved away as if they were burning me, staggering over to the sink, fingers turning white from my grip on the stone.
"I´m fine!" I snapped, turning my head slightly to glare at her. "Go back into the kitchen. I´ll – I´ll be there shortly."
Just the thought of food had my stomach roll again and I tightly closed my eyes, breathing through my nose.
"No." This time Susan's voice was strong, unapologetic. "You look like you pass out any minute. Just… just go outside for a few minutes until it gets better, okay?"
"Whatever." Turning the tap, I held my hands under the cold water capturing it in my palms to wash my face. The coolness felt heavenly on my heated skin and I let out a sigh, already feeling a bit better. But since Susan had proposed that I stay away from the kitchen, I would take advantage of it.
Still feeling her stare on my back, I didn't bother to turn around as I addressed her. "I won´t pass out, so you can go now."
All I got in reply was an 'alright' before she closed the door behind her. Instantly dropping my façade, I let myself slump against the sink, hands shaky as I closed my eyes and tried to level my erratic heartbeat. It took me a few moments but when I finally felt like staying upright by myself, I redid my hair, several strands had come loose while I felt like my body was trying to rid itself from my stomach. I hadn't felt this bad in a long time – not since I thought with fifteen it would be a good idea to break into my brother´s hidden liquor stash with my crush at the time. He was already seventeen, a good friend of Zeke´s, and one of the hottest guys I knew… well until Eric, who I didn't want to think about, not after the disaster that was last Sunday´s meeting.
Instead, I focused on the memories that hurt less.
Gathering all my brother's hidden vodka bottles in one of his training bags, I met up with Greg in an abandoned part of the living quarters where we all went to smoke pot and drink. That night, we were alone, managed to both drink until I passed out and had the worst headache of my life.
It was also the night I lost my virginity.
Scrunching up my nose, I only remembered some awkward groping, a dull pain that was amplified by the friction and a heavy body slumping on me, almost crushing me in the process.
Maybe I was better off not remembering after all.
I crossed the bathroom with shaky legs, making my way out of the headquarters through a side door. Pushing open the door, the light breeze and warming sun rays made me feel a lot better after spending the whole day in the stale building that seemed to suck the happiness out of everyone.
Outside, with the birds chirping I felt like a whole another person, cynically asking myself why they couldn't have made me go to amity… Everything was better than this bland existence they called life.
Sighing, I leaned back against the wall of the headquarters, glad that the nausea and dizziness had subsided. But now I had a bigger problem than my deteriorating health. Speaking with a soldier that was running patrols through the Abnegation sector, Max had delivered me a message – that if I had reliable information already I could hand them over later when we would give food to the factionless. The whole ordeal would be overseen by dauntless, their initiates, to my grief, and their instructors. The soldier would approach me and I would slip him whatever I already had in form of a note.
Exhaling deeply again, I got up, deciding that it would be better to get the notes now before I attracted Marcus attention, especially now that his mood seemed to get gradually worse with every passing day.
Max said he had everything planned out and that I shouldn't worry my pretty little head too much.
A foolproof plan is what he called it.
I thought it was the plan of a fool.
The downside of reading so many fics is not remembering what really happened.. I know Four still had the glass sculpture & I just read that Marcus found it but here it´s still hidden… maybe he was able to put it back before Marcus destroyed it..?
Next chapter another run in with dauntless and an unpleasant outcome.
I´ll try to update ptp in the next few days! It´s been too long..
Thank you for reading & reviewing! :)
