He shouldn't have ever thought anything about Rin's appearance because his inner self did not at all still itself. It continued probing and prodding until Sesshomaru would quiet it but that would never last. Some days it was silent and some days it was vocal and there were other days where it was an even amount of both. Today there wasn't much of the noise inside his head which was good, it was becoming taxing to listen to his own voice but deeper argue with him. Rin was fluttering around the compounds in a butter cream colored kimono and blue diamond print, enjoying the springtime air but life wasn't all just fun and games for her. There was work to be done of which included learning bigger words, history lessons, and other such things.
At dawn she would play the shamisen for her lord and tell him all that she had learned. Whether or not he was truly interested didn't matter to her, she wanted to tell someone. He always was listening in depth to her go on even if it didn't seem like it was important to him. She was lying down on her stomach in the vast library after finding a particularly interesting book. She held her head up with one curled fist and looked at it, caught deep in the work. It fascinated her because it was a documentation about demonic wars and though she seemed not to be the type to like that sort of thing it was concerning Lord Inutaisho. She didn't know much about her lord's father and she yearned to know more since he might never tell her.
Rin thumbed through the text, never taking her eyes off of it. There were illustrations painted upon the pages of the powerful and ever feared Inutaisho. She had to admit he was a fearsome beast when in his true form but as himself she noted that Inuyasha took after his father in a lot of ways physically. She took out maps that she found and placed them on the floor, studying them as she was trying to figure out just where these battles took place. She was also interested in broadening her spectrum in all ways and so she took great care to look upon the maps and remember each place. Her finger ran across the pages marking each place that she knew of and each place she wished she could go. Rin wanted to have another adventure out in the world but she was also fine with just staying here. As long as she was with Sesshomaru then nothing else mattered.
Speaking of him he was in one or more of these battles, by his father's side. This was before they had a rift between them because of Izayoi and Inuyasha. There were depictions of Sesshomaru there painted beautifully for her to admire. She took her free hand and stroked the picture of him with a loving smile. Even in the heat of war he looked terribly handsome, fangs bared, eyes glowing red. It was so dangerous and yet so chillingly evocative. She was not frightened of his transformation in the least, he was still outstanding in the looks department. She sighed with love just looking at him, imagining those long claws trailing her skin again. She shuddered with unrestrained want.
"What are you doing?" Sesshomaru's voice asked causing her to jump somewhat and squeak.
"My lord! I didn't hear you come in. I'm just brushing up on different wars. I found one you were in!"
"So I see. Does this truly interest you?"
"In a way yes because you are in it and your family. I want to know as much as I can about everyone."
"You could ask me."
"I didn't think you'd be willing to tell me about your father," She explained, rising from her laying down position. "You don't seem to like him very much."
"The past has passed. Things have changed."
"Alright then," Rin sat criss crossed on the floor and pat the spot right next to her, "come sit and we can talk about it...if you want to..."
He sat down next to her even though there were chairs but he preferred this. He looked over at what she was looking at so intently. He remembered every time he went into battle, every fight he had ever been in, each loss and each win and most of all he remembered the kind of fighter his father was. There were days where he felt he'd never measure up to him. He looked up to him, respected him, wanted to be like him but once he back stabbed them by choosing a mortal woman all of that went down the drain quickly. That and the horrible affront to his dignity caused by giving him what he once felt was a weak sword. He knew better now. Once he let go of his revenge and his desire to have Inuyasha's sword his became more powerful and his father did that on purpose. He wanted him to appreciate what a gift he was given for he already had the might of one hundred men and could protect himself even without a sword. His half-brother had nothing, he needed something to protect those he cared for and himself.
Sesshomaru for a long time had no one to protect other than himself and he could do that just fine even if all he had was a stick. Now, though, he did have someone to protect...the woman who was sitting right next to him. He was her protector and now that he was more powerful than ever he felt he could do that job far better than before. Briefly he discussed with her that very battle he was in but he also answered any questions burning in her mind about his father. He told her about what kind of man he truly was, the face he saved for when he was in the privacy of his home or around close friends. There were many who adored him, worshiped him, his name was hailed around the world as one of the greats. Sesshomaru dreamed of having such status but if he never acquired it then it wouldn't bother him. Fame wasn't everything but honor, that was something else entirely.
He had people who honored him and bowed to him, the trees even swayed for him when he walked past and even those that didn't know him at all felt his regal presence, his power, his demonage. Rin was different in the sense that she held in the highest regard but not because of his name or his prowess but just because he saved her life. That was enough for her to tail him for eternity, to cherish him, to smile for him, to never leave his side. That feeling she gave him was like none other, he could not compare it with any person on the planet. It wasn't just reverence, it was something more, something he almost couldn't grasp but he figured it was deep, deeper than he could fathom. That she felt that way about him when he had done one simple act of kindness was moving and so was her smile. He lived to see it.
She was enraptured by his story telling even if he was a man of few words if he simply said one word it would draw her in and keep her there, hanging onto it. He didn't say much to her, he wasn't a story telling kind of person, but he informed her as best he knew how. The way she looked at him, the way she always looked at him, it gave him the strangest sensation. He wasn't used to people looking at him that way. He could be reciting the alphabet to her and she would continue to look at him like he was speaking the gospel. She stayed quiet if he was talking, only to ask a question soon after he stopped. It was peaceful with her, he could say that, they could pass the time in the others presence without much of a word and hours would fly by.
It interested him that she was so interested in whatever he was telling her. She seemed rapt to his every word about demon lore and his own lineage, it was like some incredible tale to her being told. To her he had the richest voice, silky and deep, full of the mystery and beauty he carried about him. His father was both literally and figuratively larger than life, casting his darkened shadow over his two sons and it seemed they would forever live in it even after his death. Not to Rin though, she felt he had become a worthy successor to his father's title.
"Do you miss him?"
"No. His spirit is always there."
"I think of mine sometimes but it's as you said, they don't really leave us, do they? Their spirits linger on in our hearts and minds. I think, no I know, he is looking down upon you and smiling because he is so proud of the man you are."
"...You really feel that is so?"
She nodded her head. "Hai, of course. What father wouldn't be having a son like you? You're strong both inside and out, in here," she touched her chest, "I know you have succeeded him, no matter what you say."
"...Hn."
His eyes never moved from hers but instead of shying away she looked back into those fierce golden eyes only to look down at her hand when he touched it. He didn't say how those words made him feel, those words he had waited to hear since he couldn't even remember when, hundreds of years ago. His father, rest his soul, could not speak from beyond the grave to tell him what he truly felt of his son. It may seem that Sesshomaru was a bit arrogant at times but he knew he was nothing in comparison to someone that legendary. How could he ever hope to measure up to such greatness? That man left behind a legacy and it lived on in his offspring but as to how he saw them, Sesshomaru would never know. Even though it was from Rin, a human who never knew his father, it meant a lot more than he was willing to admit aloud. This moment between them, whatever it was, was broken by Rin's stomach growling.
"You haven't eaten yet?"
"I was so invested in the books that I forgot about lunch. I'll take it now though."
Rin and Sesshomaru both got up from the floor with Rin making sure to put away all that she had taken out. He had servants for that, in fact he told her to just leave it, but she had made this mess and she wanted to clean it up. She wasn't used to people doing everything for her and there was something rewarding about cleaning, seeing your hard work pay off. Rin ate her lunch the same way she ate it every day, in Sesshomaru's presence with his eerie silence and haunting stare. She slipped a piece of edamame in her mouth and after that last bite she was finished. Her plate was taken away and Sesshomaru went back to business as usual with Rin playing her instrument for him and singing too. She sung a sad song about a princess mourning her lost love who was a peasant, watching him be sent to death for being with her. It was so sad in fact that Rin started to cry which made her stop and wipe her eyes.
"Sorry my lord. Perhaps I should have sung something happier."
He looked at her then handed her a napkin to dry her eyes off with. She thanked him and consoled herself. Though the song was somber Sesshomaru liked the way she sang it, so deep with emotion as if she was the princess experiencing that grief. Every chord she strummed was laden with sorrow and her voice echoed that. It was truly like he was there in the story and it was the first time in a long time he had been touched like that, to the point of almost showing an emotion other than his straight face. The next song she sang for him was much less depressing. As time rolled on Rin started thinking of something as she was playing another song about the sea.
"My lord...can we go today? To the ocean?"
"If you want that."
"I do! Oh I'm so excited! I'll go right away and get A-Un, oh and I'll wake up Jaken from his nap too."
Rin got up hurriedly and scrambled to get everything in order. Jaken was surly about having to get up from his slumber to go look at a mere body of water. However he was not going to complain too much, at least not around his lord because he knew the moment he whined even slightly he would get a smack to the back of the head. Rin wanted to go and she wanted him to be with her so he had to deal with it. Secretly he was glad to be included in anything, usually he felt he needed to tag along just to be kept relevant. He knew that Sesshomaru didn't exactly need him for anything besides watching after Rin. If he was invited that made him feel somewhat important even if the one who invited him was Rin and not the lord he worshiped.
"Come on Jaken, hop on," Rin cried from atop A-Un. She had to help him up because of how short he was. He hated that, it made him look so foolish. The three of them headed towards the sea, Rin enthralled about it the whole time. As soon as they landed upon the sandy shores Rin kicked off her wooden sandals, rolled up her sleeves, pinned up her kimono and started to run about. She loved the feeling of the sand between her toes, it was fantastic. It was squishy, warm, soft, a little grainy, but pleasant. Some of it was dry, some of it was wet. She noticed little burrowing creatures in the sand and bent down to look at them. She pointed at them with wonder.
"What are they?"
"Those are hermit crabs, Rin," Jaken explained, feeling bored beyond belief. It was because he already knew these things and it was tiring having to tell her but it was his duty and Sesshomaru's eyes were piercing through the back of him right now. "The shells are their homes."
"Oooooh and what are these?" She exclaimed, pointing at the red scuttling creatures.
"Just normal crabs. They are rather tasty when boiled."
"Oh I'd love to try some. My lord is it possible we can have some?"
"I'll ask the servants to catch them for you."
"I can catch them myself," She proudly proclaimed, chasing after them giddily, seemingly not caring she could get pinched by them. She soon learned that by picking one up and releasing it quickly once it snapped its claws on her. "Ouch!"
"You should be more careful, Rin. Goodness use your senses next time," he grumbled, muttering under his breath, "the little that you have."
He regretted saying that because he got a whack on the back of his head, a hard one at that causing him to fall down in the sand and the wave to crash over him. Sesshomaru smelled her blood and came to her aid. When he asked her what hurt she held up her pointer finger. On it was a small cut but it was leaking out blood onto the sand, dying it red. He took her hand in his own and brought her finger to his lips, licking the wound slowly and with gentleness. He had done this before when she was smaller and thought nothing of it, it was almost expected of him yet it was different somehow. The taste of Rin was like it always was but there was something lingering on her skin and in her bloodstream that like her scent was different. This was the taste of a woman. He continued to lick her finger even after it stopped bleeding, her flavor was something indescribable and for a small fracture of his time he nearly forgot what he was doing and who they both were.
Rin just stood there, breathing sharply and getting flustered but told herself to stay calm. Once he let go of her finger she thanked him and he told her that she should leave the wild life alone, at least the ones that looked like they could harm her. He also remarked about sea water being good for cuts, at least he heard so, something about the high salt content. She first tested out the water with her foot, it was nothing like the spring water she was used to, warmer and not as clear but still lovely to look at. She kicked up the water playfully then ran her hand across it creating a small wave. With her kimono pinned up her legs were on display, all the way to her knees. The water slid down her legs as she played in it.
Jaken finally got up from the ground and spit out the sea water and sand that had gotten into his mouth. He wrung his clothing, trying to make himself dry. A demon such as himself disdained saltwater, dried up the skin far too much. Just when he thought he was about to dry himself off Rin splashed him and giggled as she did so. He shook his staff at her, calling her wretched for getting him wet again but then he flinched knowing what was going to happen now that he said something like that. Rin saved his behind by telling Sesshomaru not to hit him, that it was her fault anyways for doing that to him. He was mercifully spared thanks to her, which made him feel like he wronged her in calling her wretched. She did that sometimes, looked out for him like he had to do for her.
Rin tasted the water and did not like it in the least. The sun was setting behind her as she splashed around. The water droplets sparkled in the air about her like diamonds. Sesshomaru just watched her, trying to forget that taste that was lingering in his mouth. He wasn't hungry but he might actually eat tonight just to wash it out. Not that it was disgusting or anything, the reason he wanted to get it out was because it was delicious. He did not like thinking that any part of Rin tasted good to him and he didn't want to even figure out if it was her skin or her blood that he favored. He didn't want it to be either but if he had to pick he'd rather it not be her blood because the scent of it caused bad memories. Also it just wasn't right, none of this was.
"Lord Sesshomaru look!" She shouted, holding up a fish in her hands. It squirmed around some but she bit into it and it stopped squirming so much. He looked at her stunned a bit that she did that, it wasn't at all what a human would do, it was like a demon, a huntress. She strolled up to him and showed him the fish closer which had her bite mark still in its scaly flesh. She had bitten it hard enough to cause it to bleed and the red was on her lips and dripping from her. Yes she wasn't a human as he looked at her, it was as his mother said. A mortal demon woman child. She was all of that.
"Lady Akino taught me how to do this. Since I caught it I'm going to cook it too. I don't like biting it because raw fish is nasty but that's how the lady does it to stop them from flopping around."
That explained it then, that explained everything actually. She spent so much time around the company of demons and demonesses that she acted like one at times, even as a little one she did so. She had to become adept to hunting and foraging when in the woods with him, her sense of smell had to be sharpened. Indeed she had the best sense of smell of any human he had met, able to whiff out things no human could. She was able to recognize the scent of wolves before one even showed up or which berries were toxic merely by the way they smelled. He knew of no other human with such a pronounced ability to smell things out. She even knew his scent for she was able to find him even when he was far away from her and knew exactly when he was coming back to her because she smelled him.
Rin gathered the wood and began to start a fire to roast her catch. Once the fire was started she sat beside it and began to cook the fish. She listened to the sounds of the waves, the gulls crying, the sea life coming alive. It was almost magical and with the fire here and her dearest companions by her side it was like old times. She called Jaken to come sit with her and though he'd rather not sit in the sand, having finally cleaned off every grain from him, he did so anyways. Once the fish was properly cooked she took it on its stick, blew on it, and handed it to Jaken with a big smile.
"Aren't you going to eat it?"
"I got it for you, actually."
"M-m-me? Rin there was no reason to do that, I'm fine."
"But Lord Jaken, please? I want you to have it."
"Well...I guess since its already done," he shrugged, trying to be as aloof as his master but it wasn't working. He took the fish and started to eat it, it was cooked perfectly. "It's not half bad."
"I'm so glad you enjoy it! Oh look the sun has almost entirely set. Isn't it pretty?"
"I suppose so," Jaken remarked with a mouth full of fish, looking at the sun set and all the colors of the sky. "but I've seen it a thousand times."
"It doesn't matter how many times I see it, it still amazes me. What about you my lord?"
He wasn't looking at the sunset at all he was focused on her, her eyes were not just brown in the light, they were like amber and the look on her face was so serene. All the colors of the setting sun were displayed all over her, shards of broken light and color played on her skin and clothes. The gentle sea breeze hit her face and she closed her eyes, breathing in deeply.
"It's just a sunset to me, I've seen prettier things."
"I have too but I can't help but be wowed by this every time. It's like how every day I see you I still get taken aback at how you look despite having seen you so much."
"I understand then...I suppose there are everyday things that hold some splendor to them."
The trio enjoyed the surrounding area to their heart's content. Rin was right, despite having seen it every time the sunset was rather nice to look at but he could not recall one more lovely than this one as Rin's skin turned gold in the lighting. After they went home Sesshomaru told his kitchen staff about the crustaceans on the sea shore and how Rin was apt to try them. Quick on their feet they procured a whole bucket full of jittery pinching creatures and boiled them until they were ready to consume. They presented her with her meal causing her to poke the thing with chopsticks to see if it was indeed dead. When assured that it was she figured out how to eat it and enjoyed it fully. Her stomach was full and her heart was happy with all that she had experienced today. She slept well that night and arose looking forward to whatever would come next. A few days after that Sesshomaru was in a room which housed many scrolls but wasn't the library and as he slid one out he could see through the window that Rin was outside.
She was wearing a powder blue kimono and kneeling in the grass. She had one hand cupped and the other hand was taking from it and spreading whatever was in it around. It appeared that she was feeding the birds as they were all around her, tweeting and pecking at the ground. She was in her element, in harmony with nature, and it seemed to be at harmony with her as the birds were unafraid to be on her. She was able to even use her finger to pet one on the chest. She spread out more crumbs another way, facing him now and they were now locked in each other's sight. As she saw him standing there she waved at him cheerily. He didn't wave back but she still kept her grin as if not deterred by his lack of common greetings.
Today he had another trip he had to make to the cherry blossom village and he thought he'd take her with him again. The people there seemed to like her and she liked them. Later on in the day that's what he did and once more she was left with the children of the leader. Rin had brought a basket of food with her and shared it with them. Once it was all done she told them about her trip to the ocean and she also played more games with them. When her lord came to get her once more he found her sitting down with Erity in her lap and she was putting flowers in her hair. There were also flowers in Mei's hair too, the little bit of hair she had. As Rin was walking home with Sesshomaru she noticed he had a bag in one of his hands and inquired about it.
"It's for you," he told her, handing it over. "Daichi thought you might want it."
"Oh a gift for me? How thoughtful of him. I should do him a kindness back," She stated, opening the bag up to see what was inside. She pulled out a small rectangle wrapped in bright colored paper. She opened it up and took an experimental taste of it. "Oh it's ginger candy! There's a lot of it too. Did you know that's what it was?"
"He didn't tell me what was in the bag, only that it was meant for you."
"It tastes fresh, like he made it himself. He really didn't have to do all that but it's kind of him. So how did everything go?"
"It went as well as could be expected. It was only a trade deal."
"Interesting," she mused with a piece of candy in her mouth. "My lord is so busy. It must be taxing being in charge of so much."
"It can be, sometimes, but it's not like I can't handle it."
"I know. You can take on any challenge, my lord."
She believed he could do anything even if it seemed too big a task for him. She wasn't wrong, it was a lot of work doing his actual duties and a big mess too but it had to be done. Rin would never understand, how could she? But she was understanding at least and supportive. Sesshomaru offhandedly asked her what she was going to do with the rest of her time today, acting as though what she said held no interest to him. It was still early in the day yet and she had a lot of options out there for her but right now what she wanted to do was go into the woods again with Lady Akino.
"You seem to favor the woodlands here."
"I love your forest so much, it's so peaceful especially in the glade and by the ponds. When I'm in there I lose track of time and feel like I am part of it, like I'm just another animal but not aggressively wild."
"The forest here has been protected by my forefather's, it has a barrier around it. This is why I let you roam there unsupervised. It is safe but there are demons there. Be wary, even if you were to tell them my name some would not believe you."
"I understand my lord, that's why I will now only leave when Lady Akino leaves. If I stay close to her I shouldn't come across much trouble, right?"
"Even if I don't tell her, she will keep you under her watch."
Rin knew that much, Lady Akino had not threatened her when they first met. She was pleasant and not at all human hating. She was only curious but she would not harm her. Rin found herself soon enough back in the woods she adored so much, greeting the kitsune. She rolled around in the grasses with the kits and chased them about. After so much play she began to get tired and she did not even notice as she was sitting there, her body slowly lowering to the floor and her eyes shutting. All the sudden she was fast asleep on the forest floor. Lady Akino did not move from that spot only watched her sleep as her children slept close to her, like she was just another one of them but bigger. Sesshomaru had to come get her this time, secretly fretting over the fact that she was in there so long. When he arrived he saw her sleeping soundly like the grassy floor was as comfortable as a normal bed.
"She's all tuckered out," Lady Akino told him, stretching from her spot still in her normal fox form. "But I stayed here to keep an eye on her. I knew you would want that since she means so much to you."
He ignored that last bit of her statement and awoke Rin. She got up rubbing her eyes sleepily and yawning. After she was all the way awake they went home. The whole way there he wondered just how much Rin meant to him really. He wouldn't dare say she meant nothing to him but he also wasn't going to dive into territory unknown. All he knew for sure was Rin was very important to him and he could not fathom life without her. They walked as they always did side by side but something seemed to catch Rin's eye. She grabbed his hand and enclosed it in her own then pointed at the sky with her other hand. Streaking across it was a shooting star. She closed her eyes and stood there silently as she held his hand. He looked at their hands, his eyes having widened a fraction at her grabbing it the way they did.
She had not released it yet. Perhaps she forgot. He looked at their hands for a prolonged time then slowly his held hers back. His eyes then went to the sky, looking at the stars, there were so many shooting that night. She opened her eyes and turned to him then noticed his hand holding hers. She blushed and wasn't sure what to do, so she just kept it there. She was not at all counting on him to do that and indeed she had forgotten she was still holding his. She couldn't think of why he was doing this but it was making her heart speed up some of which he could feel flowing from her veins through her hand into his. They both were looking at each other now, the way her eyes twinkled made the stars look ordinary and boring. He was pondering why her heart was beating like it was and tried to attribute it to the fact that the stars were exciting to her.
"I...I made a wish...," She clarified, their eyes still affixed to the other's eyes.
"What did you wish for?" He pondered softly, genuinely wanting to know for if she desired something he wanted to give it to her.
"I wished...to be forever at your side...together with Lord Sesshomaru."
"Rin..."
"I know it's silly. I suppose...I should have wished for my health or for prosperity towards my friends."
"No...it's not," he gently stated, a warmth in his eyes and voice. She held his hand tighter and he griped hers back. They stayed there for a long time, just they two, under a sea of stars.
