Let's Build on This
Hello, Hello! Here's another Zutara story that I've been working on. I actually started this months ago, if not even last year but, I couldn't really work it out properly and where I wanted to go with it but now that I'm in my Zutara feels again, I had some ideas and started writing this again. Hope you enjoy it.
Disclaimer: Avatar: The Last Airbender doesn't belong to me.
Chapter 1: Closure
Katara was seething when she'd seen Zuko outside her tent but his admission that he wanted to help her find her mother's killer stopped her in her tracks. How could he possibly know anything about that but, she decided to hear him out and he told her everything he knew based on what Sokka had told him. She was almost trembling with the news, could it really be true? With Zuko's help, that man would be in reach. She didn't want to get her hopes up too high but at the same time she knew how resourceful Zuko was. He'd already done this twice with Aang and Sokka, he'd even managed to help Sokka bring their father back.
But then their plan hit a snag. When Aang and Sokka, her own brother, tried to stop her, she used every ounce of strength within her to keep herself from losing it. How could they not understand how important this was to her? Why would Sokka try to stop her? Her mind couldn't fathom it. She could very vividly remember how broken and completely devastated their family was after that day. She was never the same after hearing her father cry so painfully and watching him try to be brave for his children. She remembered how many times Sokka would sneak out at night and throw his boomerang around for hours until he exhausted himself so he could sleep a dreamless sleep.
And she remembered her own nightmares of constantly seeing that man and hearing him shout at her. The way her mother calmly told her to go find her father and the pain of realising it was her last time seeing her mother.
So why?
Why wouldn't they let her do this? Couldn't they see that she was barely holding on at that moment?
And to dare suggest forgiveness, it wasn't an option. Not for someone like him.
She may have ended the conversation but things were far from over. She and Zuko went back to her tent, if they wouldn't willingly let her leave then she'd sneak off without permission when it was too late to stop her. She told this idea to Zuko, half expecting him to try talk her out of it, that taking Appa without Aang's approval would be going too far but, he agreed no questions asked. When she made her thoughts known he responded that he was going with her no matter what, she couldn't read his expression but part of her was grateful to him.
It was the following morning when Zuko finally convinced Katara to get some rest. For the next few hours Zuko was alone with his thoughts yet focused on getting to their destination as fast as possible. It wasn't just about doing this mission with Katara to make up for his betrayal but also about helping her get the closure she deserved.
A closure he hadn't known until quite recently.
The very thing that connected them in the first place brought them together again. He would get her to her mother's killer no matter what it took. Even though his life had been difficult at best, he at least had confirmation from his father that his mother was still alive. This situation was completely different with Katara but he was still able to help her.
Throughout the journey and as they inched closer and closer to the island he would look back to check on her, still fast asleep.
After confirming that he wasn't the man, they flew to the quiet countryside village in the Fire Nation. The information the leader on the ship gave them was legit.
They'd found the monster.
Just seeing his face sickened her and all the rage she'd been holding back for the entire journey was fighting to break out. She could feel her heart racing in her chest as she approached him. She didn't know which answer made her angrier: his first one when he said he didn't remember her or the second when he realised exactly who she was. She didn't even get the satisfaction she thought she would when he swallowed hard, the fear painfully visible on his face. Even if she didn't feel particularly better, she was glad it was there, she was glad he was afraid of her. In the middle of the rain, his pitiful life was in her hands. Her element raining down on her, rinsing her fury off her skin and into the droplets she was now controlling.
The water dome enveloped them, a brief period of relief from getting drenched. Everything else around her was completely blocked out. The only things that mattered were her, the water she was holding and the man cowering in front of her.
The longer she held, the more her inner voice told her to do it, finish it, finish him.
Kill him, Katara!
He more than deserves it!
He's the reason your life changed so drastically, the reason your family was hurt and broken.
He stole your mother from you!
She was so close to doing it.
She was about to do it but…
Ultimately, she didn't do it.
The ice shards hit the ground as water and he begged for his life and grovelled at her feet. She felt nothing anymore, closed her eyes then left, Zuko close behind her.
Their journey home was silent save for the occasional grunt from Appa. Zuko in the front while Katara sat in the back reeling and going over everything that had just happened. She hugged her knees to her chest, stray tears gliding down her face. Just a moment ago she was burning with rage and wanting to let it all out and now she was almost numb.
"Could you have done it…?" she started after such a long silence. "If you were in my shoes would you have done it? Could you do it?" she looked up at the sky before looking at him.
"I'm not sure," he answered honestly.
They were approaching his old family home on Ember Island.
"Could you drop me off here before you go fetch the others? I just need some time alone."
Appa set down on the shore and Zuko watched her walk straight to the pier and sit down, watching the sun set.
Xxx
After finally forgiving Zuko and hugging him in a friendly embrace, Katara walked back to Appa where Sokka was waiting for her. She stopped in front of him but didn't look him in the eyes. He put his hand on her shoulder and she finally looked up. He was slightly teary eyed and pulled her into a hug.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"I will be." she slowly pulled away and wiped her eyes. "Sokka, I'm really sorry for what I said earlier. I just—
"You don't have to apologise, I get it. I miss mom too and I know that you had to go on this journey. I'm glad you're safe. I had no idea just how much this was weighing you down." they started walking towards the house.
"I didn't want you to because then you'd worry about me" she admitted.
"You've been taking care of us for so long, would it really have been so bad if someone took care of you for once, if I returned the favour?" they were in the courtyard when he posed his question. He gave her one last comforting look before going over to Aang and the others to help unload their stuff from the saddle.
After dinner everyone was headed to their rooms to call it a night. Katara was on her way to her room as well but there was something she had to do first. She walked over to his door and knocked three times.
"Katara, is everything alright?" Zuko answered the door
"Yeah it's just, can we go for a walk?"
The two of them walked out the house as quietly as they could as to not disturb the others. Once by the beach Katara stopped and looked up at the moon. The sound of the rhythmic crashing waves calming her.
"I just wanted to say thank you, for today." she took a seat in the sand and crossed her legs and he joined her. She sighed before continuing. "I honestly thought I'd be sitting with this unresolved pain forever; that I'd just have to somehow move on from this but, now I feel lighter than I've ever felt. I finally feel like I can start healing thanks to you helping me. I was a bit surprised you didn't say anything when I didn't kill him."
"It was your mission. Whatever decision you made I was going to go along with it. One of the things I learned after leaving home to join you guys was that I had to get to that answer on my own. Being told the answer as opposed to finding the answer for yourself leaves room for doubt. So speaking from experience I knew whatever answer you needed, it had to be your choice to get there and to make." He looked down at the sand in front of him.
Katara silently agreed with him. She'd come to the same conclusion Aang and Sokka had mentioned, she didn't kill Yon Rha but, that didn't mean that confronting him was unnecessary. They sat in silence for a while, only the sound of the waves surrounding them. Katara hugged her knees to her chest. Tears left her eyes as she put her forehead on her knees, trying to hide her tears.
"It's strange, I was feeling numb for most of the day but now…" she spoke with her head still pressed to her knees. Zuko could hear that she was crying.
"You don't have to hold back." He put his hand on her shoulder. The sudden contact of his warm hand on her was enough for her to lean against him, letting out her tears and pain in full force. She'd kept the hurt and the memories of her mother deep within her for so long that feeling them again overwhelmed her as she cried and cried and cried. She was glad that she wasn't alone, glad that he was rubbing her back as she cried, glad that he was with her.
After ten minutes she'd calmed down and wiped away the last of her tears, her head still resting on his shoulder and looking out into the ocean. She closed her eyes and focused on her breathing, not realising how tired she was, and fell asleep. Zuko was starting to feel tired as well and when he suggested they head back, silence answered him. He looked to his side to see Katara fast asleep against him. A small smile graced his face as he carefully picked her up and carried her back to the house.
He carried her to her room, gently placed her on the bed and covered her with the blanket before leaving.
The following morning Katara woke up in bed. She stretched and looked around the room confused. How did she get here? The last thing she remembered was being on the beach with Zuko and their conversation. As she got out and went to the balcony to try gather her thoughts, she saw Zuko training in the courtyard. And then it clicked. She face-palmed. I fell asleep.
She left her room and headed to the courtyard where Zuko was. As soon as he saw her watching him train he'd stopped and walked over to her, a towel around his neck.
"Sleep well?" he asked and sat next to her, the slight mocking in his voice wasn't lost to her.
"Apparently so well that I didn't even notice you carrying me back." She gave a playful nudge in his arm.
The air between them had shifted and they both knew it. Ever since he'd earned her trust again, they were talking more casually and spending more time together. Now that things had been cleared between them, a genuine friendship began to grow and they were both happy about it.
And there you have it, ch1 is done! Starting with the great Southern Raiders moments but with some added inner thoughts and feelings from Katara and Zuko and just how I saw a type of "afterwards" moment with them going, and also between her and Sokka. Hope you enjoyed, and lemme know what you think. Ch2 (which I'm almost done with) was so much fun for me to write and I can't wait to share it!
Anyways that's it from me-
Until the next chapter:
Ketsui Tasogare :-)
