Roni Malum had had a lot of heartbreak in her life. Lucy's outburst that morning, the "Regina bomb" as Henry termed it, had sent her down memory lane, thinking about all of her disappointments, which there were many. While she doesn't actually believe she was an Evil Queen, she must have done something wrong in a past life to be stuck with the hand she's been dealt, committed some atrocity that made it so nothing ever goes right for her. This has to be some kind of karmic balancing for past sins. Her life is filled with disappointments, mistakes, losses and what ifs. Many of the big what ifs were also the biggest losses in her life: what if the agency hadn't backed out the adoption, what if Damien hadn't died, what if her mother hadn't married that rat bastard of a stepfather who used and abused her until the day she ran away, and what if she hadn't let Archer Locke get away? Those were her biggest heartbreaks and only one of them she had been able to do something about, but she didn't.
She told Belfry regrets aren't really her thing, and they aren't, but she does have one, she regrets how things went down with Archer. She had loved him more than any other person in her whole life, might even still love him. It was an instant attraction, one she had fought initially, preferring to stay on her own and independent. But he had broken down her walls, and for the first time in her life, she felt like someone really saw her, not her persona, her past or her mistakes. He saw and wanted Roni, all of her, and it had absolutely terrified her to let him in, but some strong encouragement, she went for it. For a while, it was everything, she had never felt so supported, loved and cherished than in those moments with Archer. But she was Roni, and life always came and kicked her in the ass. So, she wasn't that surprised when a woman showed up out of the blue claiming he was the father of her son.
After verifying it with a DNA test, Archer had become a father to a son that lived in New York. He was a good man, and he loved his son so much. It was heartbreaking to see how the distance, expense and travel were preventing him from having the relationship he really wanted with Robert, one that he needed after missing so much of his life. She saw how it killed Archer to only see his son in person every other month, and she started seeing him less as he worked more and more overtime to raise money to visit him. His life became all about Robert, as it should have been, but it was painful to watch as he worked himself to death just to experience a few short days with him. It wasn't enough, and it was never going to be enough.
It broke her when Archer confided in her how he had always wanted a child and that for a while he thought that she was going to be his chance. It was then Roni knew she couldn't give Archer what he needed and what he deserved. She can't have children, something she'd begrudgingly made peace with. Though she wanted children, she knew it was best that she wasn't able to have them, that there was no one in her life for her to fuck up. The only one was Archer, and she knew it would be selfish to keep him around when he already had a child and she would never be able to give him another one, a reason to stay. He was staying for her, and it was not enough, so though it broke her heart—a wound that never healed no matter how hard she tried—she convinced him to move to New York to be with his son. She knew that she was the thing that was holding him back, and so she ended it. Telling him to go was the hardest thing she had ever had to do, but she knew him going to New York was the best thing for him and his son. That was what propelled her to stick with radio silence even as her heart ached for him. He gave her his New York phone number and address and begged her to call or visit if she changed her mind. To this day, fifteen years later, she still wonders what would have happened if she had fought harder for him.
She would never have wanted to take him away from his son, but she could have tried harder, saw where it went, maybe moved to New York eventually if they'd been able to make it work long distance. She had loved him enough, she knows that much by the way it still burns, by the way she still cares so much for him, but she had been too scared to take that risk. Too scared to leave the only family she had left, her best friend Kelly and her daughter Margot. She and Kelly had just opened the bar when Maria had shown up, and it was far easier to make excuses why it wouldn't work than to fully commit to a future with Archer. She had tried that once before and had her heart trampled on when her fiancée, Damien Equus, had died suddenly of a heart attack. As much as she loved Archer, she'd been too scared to take that risk.
And here she is over a decade later still hung up on Archer Locke. The family she had once used as an excuse to stay had abandoned her years ago, and she was alone yet again. It seemed to be her destiny, always alone, never having someone in her corner. Relationships with people who actually cared about her were fleeting, they never stuck around once they knew the real her. She's never been enough, but she was to Archer.
She still has his number saved in her phone. Every once in a while she thinks about calling. It's silly, what would she even say to him after all these years? Would he even remember who she is? Would he care? There's a real possibility that he's changed his number, it has been a decade and a half, but she just can't bring herself to delete it. Every time she tries, something holds her back. The same thing happens every time she thinks about calling him, she opens up his contact in her phone, then chickens out.
Tonight is turning out to be one of those nights where she stares at his contact in her phone, one that's complete with an adorable picture of him and his son she snapped the last time he visited, when she realized she had to end it. She sits and stares, thinking of happier times, that really was the happiest she had ever been, so of course it had to end. She lets herself imagine calling him. Does he still sound the same? Would he even want to talk to her? Does he hate her? Can he ever forgive her? Those and a million other questions swirl around in her brain as she sips at a glass of whiskey, alone with her thoughts and what ifs. It's not a good combination, but it's par for the course for her, and that conversation with Henry had opened up old wounds, reminding her how truly alone in the world she is. No family, no friends, so lonely that she tries to befriend young, similarly lonely patrons of her bar and help them avoid a life like hers, one that's barely worth living.
She thinks about it sometimes, about ending it, there would be no one to miss her, no one would care, life would go on. But she can't go through with it, too scared to do anything it seems. Her one saving grace is the bar, the place that barely makes enough to pay the rent, but it's hers and she built it from the ground up, it's the one thing she's gotten right—well, ish given how poorly it's doing. It provides her with an opportunity for socializing that she desperately needs, though many of her patrons are not people she'd willingly associate with outside of the joint, there's a comfort in having someone to talk to every now and then. Even with how solitary she is, how much she likes to be alone, and how much she often hates people, going more than a few days without seeing or talking to another person drives her absolutely mad. She's learned the hard way that too much alone time is far more dangerous than too little, is a breeding ground for all of her demons to come out to play and drive her deeper and deeper into despair.
Without her bar she'd have nothing and that had sort of been the point when she agreed to sell it to Belfry, she'd have nothing tying her down, no reason to keep going. Belfry caught her at a low point, and she is so grateful she found her fight again. Things had seemed hopeless, then Jacinda started to fight against Belfry and inspired her to stand up to her, to not give that awful woman what she wanted. It's a struggle, and she can barely afford to keep the bar going, but it's worth the financial precarity to shove it to Belfry.
At one time she was always brave like that, stood up against the bullies of the world and actually went after what she wanted. She's not sure when she lost that, but she wants it back, wants to be able to finally make this damn phone call and settle this Archer thing once and for all.
Maybe she can, all she has to do is hit the button…
Her heart races as the phone rings, once, then a second time. This is probably the stupidest thing she has ever done, and she's done a lot of dumb things. Who calls someone after fifteen years of silence? It's crazy, but she is and she's committed now. Her heart is racing as it rings again and time seems to be passing at an exceptionally slow rate. Everything has slowed to nearly a stop and as it rings a fourth time she realizes she hadn't checked the time in New York. It's eight in Seattle, too early to have drank as much as she has, but oh well. That makes it eleven in New York, so it's not exactly a middle of the night call, but still the timing is not ideal. She's just about to hang up when she hears a, "Roni?" in that sensual voice that always makes her heart race.
"Hi," she stammers out breathlessly, "I know it's been a long time, I hope it's not too late to call."
"It's not, though I must admit I was very shocked when I saw the caller ID, I didn't think I would ever hear from you again."
That's a fair observation. "I didn't think I'd ever call again," she admits as her hand tugs at her hair nervously.
"So what changed?" he asks curiously and somehow without judgment.
She's not really sure how to answer that question but settles on, "I met someone."
"Oh, I see," he says darkly.
Oh god, that's not what she meant at all. This is not going how she wanted it, not even a minute in and she's already fucking it up, because she's Roni and that's what she does. His tone tells her that he thinks she's seeing someone romantically (and she was referring to Henry, which just no) but the fact that it bothers him thrills her more than it should.
"It's not like that, just a kid who's been hanging out at the bar, he got me thinking about the past is all."
"I've also found myself thinking about the past lately," he replies softly, and god she's missed that lovely voice. "I've often wondered how you were doing, but I didn't think you ever wanted to speak to me again."
She knows where he got that impression. She had been quite harsh when she broke up with him in order to convince him to go, and to let her go. She winces remembering how he had said she was his future and she told him she had never loved him.
"I always wanted to say I'm sorry, I just…" thinking about that night brings up too many emotions and her throat goes tight. She's torn between wanting to hide her emotions, and that impulse she's always had with him to be completely honest. "I just needed you to go, you needed to be with your son. I was holding you back, and I couldn't do that to you." With that she chokes back a sob remembering how awful it had been to do that, how much it hurt to break both of their hearts.
"I understand why you did what you did, and moving to New York to be Robert's father was and is amazing, but I never got over you." His voice begins to rise in anger, "I would have died for you, Roni, and we could have made it work. If you had just been honest with me, things would have been so different. We could have been a family, me, you and Robert. But you, you took that chance away from us when you lied to me."
He's right, and she can't stop the tears from welling in her eyes. She lets out a shaky breath in response, trying to collect herself before speaking. "I couldn't give you what you needed, and you deserved so much better than me."
"You shouldn't have decided that for me," he spits out bitterly, adding, "I would have done anything to make us work, and it would have worked. I found out later the reason Maria found me was because she was dying, Roni. She died six months after you broke my heart. If you had just hung on for six months, everything would have been different. Why couldn't you do that, Roni? Why couldn't you let yourself be happy?"
"I don't know, I'm just destined to keep making mistakes, to keep ending up alone."
"You know I've never been able to love anyone after you. And god knows, I've tried."
"Me too," she whispers pitifully, knowing exactly what he means. She gave up on love after realizing no one was ever going to make her feel the way he had.
"I kept your number this whole time, and I'm glad you called, I'm glad to know you are sorry, but please don't ever contact me again. You ruined my chances at love, and I cannot forgive you for that."
Roni hears the click and knows that he hung up. In all the times she had imagined how that conversation would go, him crushing her heart like that wasn't one of them. She thought the worst she could hear was that he was with someone else, but now, she would give anything for that to be the case, to take away the knowledge that she ruined Archer Locke's life.
The next day is rough, Weaver brings her the adoption papers that have her thinking crazy things, that turn out not to be so crazy when Ivy wakes her up. She wants to kill that bitch for what she did to Henry, but she is not that person anymore. But god, she wants to wipe that stupid smirk off of Ivy's face. Her head is pounding and she's disoriented as hell as her brain sorts out what's real and what's not. Roni's life is swirling in her head with Regina's and it's all too much, far too much pain for two lifetimes, one of which is fake, but Ivy is here talking, gloating, and she can't have that.
She pushes through the storm in her head, forcing the words out, unable to control the anger she asks, "What do you want, huh? A gold star, or did you just wake me to gloat?"
There are so many things, and she should be doing more, should be getting answers, but she doesn't yet know the questions.
The world is still spinning and she can't quite focus in on Drizella, who's talking, and she needs to listen, wills her brain to stop screaming at her so she can hear these words over the onslaught of memories, fears and confusion. "As much fun as that is, no. I woke you up because I need your help, I am on the verge of showing my mother what true suffering is, and I can't have anyone breaking the curse now."
It takes a minute, her brain too full of information to sort out what's happening, what Drizella means. She knows it's important, her body is reacting and she can feel a well of sorrow, knows that something is terribly wrong, just not what.
Her stomach pitches so hard she nearly gags as she realizes in horror that she's been pushing Henry toward Jacinda, unintentionally endangering her son. The thudding in her head couples with the grief over what's happened to Henry and she's consumed by pain, frozen by it. The rest of Drizella's visit is a haze, passes by in blur, leaving her with a feeling of loss so strong she breaks down as soon as she's alone in the bar. She blames it all on a migraine when she gets someone to cover for her, though this pain is far far worse than that.
She leaves the bar distraught, broken and hopeless. The pain swallows her whole, an endless spiral, until it finally spits her out, leaving her with an emotional hangover worse than she's ever had. Everything hurts, her body, mind, heart and soul. She's known earth-shattering pain before, but this hits harder than almost anything else because of what's at stake: Henry and her role in it all.
That last line Drizella left her with, "breaking hearts is kind of what you're good at," sticks with her as she processes, and eventually, it triggers that conversation she had with Archer yesterday. He had sounded just like Robin, but that couldn't be, and though she wants to know who that was, a weak part of her hoping it was somehow Robin, she is a mother first. She calls Henry back with shaky hands, pretending to be Roni once she's regained some control over her emotions, and arranges to meet up with him. It's pure torture knowing the pain the curse caused him, especially given her role in its enactment. She did this to save him, couldn't bear losing him, but she knows that having no one is the worst curse imaginable, perhaps worse than death. The curse was to protect his life, but he's been barley living under the curse, and it kills her that his happiness is so close, but she cannot let him have it. She has to actively work against it, and what kind of mother is she for doing that? Is it really the right thing to leave him like this, all alone and in the dark, unaware of how much he is loved, letting him believe he doesn't have anyone who cares about him? She has been there before and wouldn't wish that on her worst enemy, let alone her poor son.
She loves him too much to let him go, but she's made mistakes with that before, and it's selfish but she won't let go, can't let go. Henry would have made a different choice, would have told her to let him die rather than cast this curse, but she did it anyway, couldn't not. And now he's paying the price for that, they all are, and it's all her fault.
God, she wishes there was magic here, wishes she could rip her damn heart out and escape the weight of all these emotions which are bogging her down, preventing her from figuring out how to fix this mess she's made.
She did one thing right today at least. She didn't finish the drink Ivy had poured for her, and somehow amidst the chaos in her brain, she'd saved it. A part of her must have known it would be useful, and she's hoping there is enough magic left in that drink to wake another person. It's too risky to wake Henry—no matter how much she longs for it, to ease his pain—because contact with magic may jumpstart the magic poison that's flooded his veins. Though she doesn't have someone to wake up yet, she's smart enough to save this bit of magic, knows it will be useful to her later on. For now though, she needs to see her son. She saw him the day before as Roni, but she has to see him now that she's awake.
She stares at their picture as she waits for him and wills herself not to cry, she's better than that, needs to be better than that for Henry. She smiles and fights off a flood of tears as he walks up to her, healthy, alive, but unknowing. She desperately needs a hug right now, but that won't happen, can't happen. She will not add to his suffering, cannot have him concerned about her.
Soon he's telling her how well things went with Jacinda, and she wants him to be happy so badly, wants for them to be together again, but she knows she has to interfere and stop it. It's far too dangerous. It breaks her heart all over again because this Henry is so miserable, and Jacinda and Lucy have been taking parts of that away, not all of it because the curse is cruel, bestowing deep rooted grief that can only be plucked by its undoing. She cannot fix it, they cannot fix it. All she wants is to hold him in her arms, comfort him, but she can't. She is not this person for him, he doesn't have that person. There is no one to truly comfort him.
She can't help herself and she asks him about his family, about who his mother is, praying the curse gave him some decent memories, but her prayers go unanswered. He tells her he has no one, that he was born in prison and grew up in the system. Of course that's what it gave him, made him lost and alone, like Emma. She hadn't meant to vocalize that last part, or any of it, but she did, and now she's forced to make up an excuse. To explain how she knows who Emma is. Thank god there's a book in this curse too, or she would be screwed. She needs to be more careful, she cannot let herself lose her focus, even to relief as strong as seeing Henry again.
All this Henry ever dreamt of was having a mom, which he does, and she is aching to tell him he does have two, but she can't. She can't do a fucking thing to help him, and it's pure torment because she was never one to sit by and watch her baby suffer. She hopes that her grabbing his hand isn't weird to him, because she needs to touch him, needs to offer the slightest bit of comfort, one that's actually for the both of them. She wants more, so much more, but tries to content herself with what she does have, which is a bit of a relationship with her son. At least they aren't strangers, she can see him and talk to him, knows where he is. She can't do much else, but that's going to have to be enough. She has to accept what she has and be strong for him, so she can start to right the wrongs.
It's when she gets home that she thinks again about Archer, Roni's version of Robin. She wouldn't think twice about it, knowing that the curse modified their memories, even has cursed memories of Daniel and Mal that aren't real. Except with Archer, she spoke to him the day before, and that can't be a part of the curse. Whoever he is, he sounded like her Robin, not Locksley, which is impossible, but she doesn't think the curse could manufacture that conversation. It can't, she knows it can't, knows more about the curse than almost anyone, but if it can't, then what the hell was that?
Snow has definitely rubbed off on her because she lets herself hope that somehow, some way, he is her Robin. She's just lonely, clinging to unrealistic hopes and dreams to keep her head above water. God, she really wishes she could reach her friend right now, could hear Snow's voice, have her support in fixing this trainwreck. She'd take Charming or even Grumpy, someone, anyone to talk to about what to do, but she's all alone, the curse's favourite state. The only way to answer her question about Archer, is to see him for herself. She has to see him, and find out who he is. It will inevitably cause her heartbreak, but she has to know, but she's swimming it in anyway, what's one more?
She can't help herself and she calls Archer again. She is blatantly ignoring his request from not even twenty-four hours ago that she never contact him again. It rings once, then goes to voicemail, and she knows that he's ignored her call. She doesn't leave a message because well, what would she even say? But she vows to herself to figure out who he is, and get him back where he belongs. She owes it to whomever it is, and it has to be Locksley, it must be. This damn curse shouldn't be making both versions of her miserable. She owes it to the Queen to try and send him back, or better yet, to get her here to help sort out this mess.
She's not sure how long she was cursed, but it couldn't have been more than two years because it was cast just after Lucy's eighth birthday and Lucy is nine. She knows time isn't frozen here like it was in Storybrooke. She remembers celebrating birthdays and bemoaning her own all alone. Those are real memories, not hazy curse ones, not the twisted versions of her own reality that once felt so real.
She goes to Rumple for help, but infuriatingly, he won't stop pretending that he's not awake. She uses every weapon she can think of, even pulls the Belle card to get him to admit it, but he won't. He's picked his side and it's not hers, which is a problem, but one for another day. She's desperate to have someone on her side, to use this potion to wake someone so she's not in this hell alone, but no one here is right, waking them would cause them more pain than good and she will not do that.
Archer isn't Robin, deep down she does know that, even though she's clinging to ridiculous and crazy hopes, but he is the only one she wouldn't harm by waking them up.
She was counting on Rumple to help her out (how naive of her) or at least use his skills to help find Archer for her. Luckily, he's not the only person she knows at the police station. She brings Hook a cake, in part to make up for the one from Gothel she threw out, one she ends up making at the bar because the oven in her apartment can't hold a temperature. Jesus fuck, nothing can go right for her, can it? Her place is a dump, rundown and messy, but she doesn't have the time or the money to deal with that. One thing does go right for her, the cake (and probably the unsubtle crush on her the curse gave Rogers) works, and he finds her Archer Locke's address.
By some miracle, Jacinda is busy with Nick, Henry's best friend and Lucy's supposed father, which means Henry is safe for the time being, so Regina racks up a credit card debt she has no real way to pay, (things were so much easier when she was rich) and hops on the next flight to New York.
She's nervous and jittery the entire flight. This man hates her (or at least his cursed self does) and she has to somehow convince him to have a drink with her, so she can slip him the last of the potion from Drizella.
She knocks on what had better be his door or she's going to kill Hook, and hopes he doesn't use the peephole to see that it's her. She doesn't know what she will do if he doesn't open the door. She has no real plan, is going on instinct at a time when she's completely frazzled. It's not smart, but somehow she gets lucky.
He opens the door and glares down at her, as he bites off a bitter, "Roni, what are you doing here? I thought I made myself perfectly clear."
She cannot stop staring; it really is him, or Locksley. He looks incredible, he's barely aged but the subtle ways he has are so nice. That silver tinge in his hair just makes him that much more handsome, as do the crinkles around his eyes. She should be hurt by how he's talking to her, but she can't be when she's seeing her soulmate again for the first time in almost twenty years.
She finds her voice amidst all the staring at him, "You did, but please just have a drink with me. You will soon see that all of this is meaningless."
"Meaningless?" he asks incredulously, and she regrets her word choice, but she's distracted by him and his presence, that forest smell she's only been able to recreate in dreams. Her distracted bubble pops when he says, "You ruined my life."
She needs to focus, needs to get him to have this drink, then she can stare at how much more handsome he's become. This is going horribly, as expected, and she should have been better prepared. She wasn't counting on being quite so thrown by him, though she should have, considering how starved she's been of his presence, how she no longer has anything left of his, no mementos of their time together.
She simply says, "I'm not leaving until you have a drink with me," pulling out the bottle and taking a chance as she knows he could easily slam the door in her face, then she'd be screwed. She's counting on there being just enough of Robin in there to prevent that. If there's not, she doesn't know what she'll do.
"Fine, one drink, and then you're leaving," he says, letting her step in the door. An even stronger whiff of his forest scent hits her, and it feels like coming home. She missed it, and him, so much, but she can't let herself get too caught up in fantasies of this being her Robin, because she knows that can't be (maybe it can, please somehow let it be true). With him here in front of her, it's so hard, and she hates that she has to keep fighting her body's instincts for physical contact with the people she loves. Unlike Henry, Robin hates her, but it doesn't deter her from drinking him in hungrily, she cannot stop herself. He really looks like he could be her Robin, and she's setting herself up for a whole new well of pain with these ridiculous thoughts.
She looks around to stop gawking at him as he makes his way off into another room, his place is not bad, definitely not the worst she's ever seen (for sure better than hers as Roni). It's a bit sparse, but she wouldn't really expect otherwise from a man who lived most of life in a tent in the woods. Robin had been a man of few possessions, and it seems that aspect of his personality stayed with Archer.
He comes back from what must be the kitchen with glasses that he sets down on the coffee table, clearly wanting to avoid touching her. It pains her, and she has to remind herself that will remain when she wakes up Locksley, that this isn't her Robin, no matter how much she wants it to be.
He sits back in silence and waits as she grabs the glasses.
"The bottle is in my purse, I'll, uh, be right back," she says awkwardly, having purposefully dropped it in the hall, so she could pour his special drink without him seeing.
Okay, here goes nothing. This the last moment of pretending she gets her soulmate back, even though she knows better and that that will never happen. His entire soul was destroyed, he can never come back, there is nothing to come back.
She pours with a shaky hand as nerves overtake her. She's not ready to let go of the fantasy, but has to. She strides back into the living room, and sets his drink on the table for him.
He grabs it quickly, downing it before saying, "Alright, well, time for you to go."
She's barely sat down and he stands up, gesturing for her to go. In another circumstance, she would laugh, but no, she's waiting anxiously. It's been almost thirty seconds and his face hasn't changed. And oh no, shit, it wasn't enough, it's not working. This cannot happen. This has to work, she has to know who he is. She doesn't know what to do, but maybe he just needs a little push. He's going to kick her out anyway, so what does it matter if he thinks she's crazy?
She stands up too, and tells him, "We're cursed, you don't remember it, but you're Robin Hood."
He looks at her curiously for a second, then his face screws up in confusion and he sinks back onto the couch, eyes open but not looking at anything. They squeeze shut and his hands fly to his temples, groaning in pain. It takes a few minutes, then he's blinking, before he looks at her with recognition.
This is the moment that crushes her dreams, she steels herself for it and then…
"Regina," he says reverently, in a way Locksley never had, and it is music to her ears. She doesn't have a chance to say anything, because he's up, grabbing her and kissing her passionately.
Sparks fly out and her shattered heart pieces back together as he kisses her. Somehow, some way, this is her Robin. She can feel it, kissing Locksley, kissing anyone else, never felt like this. There's this sense of rightness, of connection that she's never had with anyone but Robin. She melts into the kiss, pulling him tightly to her, never wanting to let him go. She revels in the feeling of him here, alive. She never wants to stop kissing him, doesn't think she will ever be able to stop touching him, feeling that he is here and real, but she also needs to know how this is possible. She searched for years before she gave up, and god, she shouldn't have. She's missed him so much.
They break apart, both breathing heavily, arms still wrapped around each other, neither wanting to have any space between them now that they've been reunited. One of them says I love you first and she's honestly not sure who because they say it over and over, a refrain between soft, intimate kisses, making her heart squeeze as she's enveloped by a tenderness she thought she'd never have again. Nothing has ever felt so right, even with everything that's going on. For the first time in a long time, she's free of the weight of that pit of grief, guilt and longing that took residence when he died for her.
She presses her face into his chest as she asks, "Robin, how did this happen?"
She feels so much, such relief and happiness, which vastly outweigh the twinge of guilt for not trying harder to get him back and the curiosity. She's never leaving his arms again.
She protests as he steps back and away, because they have spent too many years apart and she's not willing to spend another moment that way. But he's pulling her down onto the couch beside him, and soon she's back in his arms, sighing as she cuddles back up into his chest and listens to the sound of his heart beating.
He strokes her hair as he tells her, "That, my love, is a long story. But first, Robyn, is she… is she here?"
She shakes her head guiltily, should have been texting her niece as soon as she was woken up. Robin deserves to see his daughter, and for all Regina knows, she's still an ocean away. "She's on a trip to see the world, I hear from her every few weeks, but it's been a while. I'm so sorry, I should have…"
"No, my love, you shouldn't have done anything. I just wanted to know that she was okay. The last I saw Roland, he was in Storybrooke, so he should be free of this curse. Can we contact them, in Storybrooke?"
She shrugs, "I'm not sure, it's not on any map and it's protected." This is embarrassing to admit but, "I don't know any of their phone numbers."
She curses herself for being so reliant on technology, on contacts and not having to know people's numbers. The only one she knows is the mayor's office, and she'd called it the other night only to discover it was not in service. She's not sure if it changed, if that's the curse or Storybrooke protecting itself, but it makes for a problem.
"We'll figure something out."
She sighs, hoping he's right but not convinced, there are too many things working against them.
"As for how I got here," he continues, "unlike Killian, Zeus gave me a choice. He told me that returning me to the world at that time would change the future significantly and put our children at risk. Henry would die and Robyn's soulmate would never exist."
"What, how did he know that and why now?" She has so many questions, but she also can't stop staring at him and touching him, her hand running up and down his arm before he grabs her hand with his own. She's overwhelmed in the best of ways by how much she loves him, and how happy she is that he's here now.
"He showed me the future and how you would split yourself, which created the Wish Realm. If I came back right away, then you wouldn't have split yourself and Alice would never be wished into existence. I thought I could return after the wish happened, and in a way a part of me did, but that would have meant Henry's death and I couldn't allow that. You see, if I had been around, you wouldn't have followed Henry on his adventure and his heart would have been taken to wake Anastasia."
Regina is flabbergasted, she can't believe Robin gave up his life for her and then waited twenty years to come back to save her son. She always knew he was incredible but this is… wow. It's too much, and she doesn't deserve it, not at all, not with what she's done in her life, but her heart practically bursts with love for this extraordinary man. She doesn't notice the tear that falls down her face until Robin gently brushes it away.
"Don't cry, darling, we are together again, and our children are safe. They will be happy again soon."
She didn't think it was possible for her to feel anymore, but hearing him say 'our children' makes her ache with love, longing and regret. "But you lost so much time because of me, and I don't deserve it."
"Regina, love, that was my choice, I could have come back right away, but I didn't." He caresses her face as he tells her, "I'm here now, and I'm not leaving you."
His other hand is running up and down her back, gently soothing her. It strikes her that she should be the one comforting him, he was the one who lost all of that time to protect her son, and she loves him so much for it, but she can't stop the feelings of guilt, grief and loss. It's not fair that he had to give up so much. He's such a good man, he didn't deserve this. He's missed so much of Robyn's, of Roland's life, it's cruel and unfair. She doesn't even know how much of Roland's life he missed, the differences in the passage of time across realms messing everything up.
She looks up into Robin's eyes, those gorgeous blues that she loves so much, then she's kissing him, this time more intensely and with purpose. He is here now, and she can't keep talking, can't handle it—her soulmate is back and she is going to reclaim what is hers. She pulls herself on top of him, desperate to feel him again, and soon her only thoughts are of being with Robin, her mind and body flooded with him, with his scent, with the feel of him against her, his lips on her skin, hands on her body. They try to savour the moment but it's been far too long, and they need each other much too desperately. Within minutes, she is naked on top of him on the floor, his hands full of her breasts as she lines them up and sinks onto him, throwing her head back at the feeling of him, and how he fits within her perfectly. That delicious stretch amplifies the ache inside of her, and she starts moving greedily, soaking up every ounce of pleasure from the feel of his cock hitting that spot inside her as his hands and mouth rile her up even more.
She hadn't had a man inside her in years, swore off men because it was never going to be as good as with her soulmate, but this, this is so much better than she remembered. It's about the best damn thing she's ever felt as their lips connect and his one hand grips at her ass, urging her to go faster while the other wedges between them, providing friction where she needs it the most. They've barely started and she's already so so close. All the emotions of their reunion making it all that much more intense. She needs him desperately, is trembling, needy, whispers I love you in the space between them, before claiming his lips again as currents of pleasure run through her. She can't stop saying his name, that she loves him, and he's the same. Every pant of Regina and I love you brings her even closer to the edge. She almost doesn't want to fall over, because the feeling is so strong and addictive, she doesn't want it to end. But her body is thrumming, on edge, so close to falling over and the tension is nearly unbearable. She needs to come, the need more acute than it has ever been before.
Robin isn't far behind, is urging her on between words of affection, is telling her how much he's missed her like this, how hot it is to be with her again, how many times he has wished for this, how much he wants her, and begging her to come for him. She lights up under the praise, her body going aflame above his as she surrenders to the vast waves of pleasure that rock through her again and again. For how fast it comes, it's a surprisingly intense orgasm that has her crying out loudly, and she's shaking from the sheer force of it when Robin follows her over the edge.
She's still shaky when his lips meet hers as they cuddle together on the floor, his hands growing bold as he flips her over, showing her just how good he still is with his hands.
She wakes up the next morning naked in his bed, curled up against him, and lets out an mmm as she remembers their passion filled night. Something about him being back after so long had put both of them in frenzy, their bodies somehow able to go again and again, until they were both too exhausted to continue.
She watches him sleep, tempted to spend all day in bed with him. It's very tempting, him being back has made her insatiable, and she wants him again, but she knows she has to return to Hyperion Heights and reality to figure out how to break the curse without killing Henry. She reaches for her phone to text Robyn but it's not up here, is still with her bag in the front entry.
Robin stirs, waking up, and she moves away so he can stretch out, and so she can get her hormones in check. As soon as he finishes stretching, he pulls her back into his arms, placing a chaste kiss on her lips.
"G'morning, love, did you sleep okay?"
"Better than okay, that was the best sleep I've had in a long time," she says, a perfect echo of what he said to her after their other first time. He smiles down at her, clearly recognizing the words. He needs to be like this forever, smiley and lovesick. He's earned happiness after everything that's happened. She needs to ensure he sees his children again, needs to find out where they are, if Roland is even in this realm, and get them back here.
It reminds her of something else, and she asks hesitantly, "Robin, if you're back, does that mean Henry's safe then? Do you know what happens if the curse breaks?"
"No, my love, when Zeus gave me the choice, when he showed me the future, he told me that I would only remember things that happened before I returned. It was so I couldn't use what he told me to alter the timeline. If I had returned initially, I wouldn't have known any of this." Her face falls and so does his in response, which is not what she wants. She wants him to be happy, not to drag him down, because she is happy he's here, so happy.
He looks deeply into her eyes as he tells her, "I know you'll figure it out my love, or I wouldn't be here."
He's always had incredible faith in her, faith she hasn't earned and didn't appreciate like she should have. She's going to start now, is not going to take any moment or any piece of him for granted ever again.
"No," she says, "we will figure it out, together," before she pulls him into another heated embrace, determined to come together with him in as many ways as possible before they return to Hyperion Heights.
