Author's Note: Thank you again for the much-needed and never-ending support! Every view, favourite, and alert makes me so happy – though the comments, in particular, mean the world to me. Thank you so much, absolutely everyone.

Also, thank you to those of you who gave me some guidance! It sounds as though shorter, more numerous chapters are preferred. As such, I decided (once again) to split this chapter into two when it was approaching the 10,000-word mark. The benefit, of course, is that it means that most of the next chapter is already written. So, resolution to follow shortly :)

OooooOooooOooooOooooO

Lily took slow, deep breaths, thoroughly enjoying the smell of fresh air. She was lying flat on her back with her arms cradling her head as she looked up at the beautiful bright blue sky, just barely visible between the leaves of the giant sycamore that stretched overhead, engulfing her in shade. Lily usually didn't care too much for summer weather (after all, wasn't the sun the sworn enemy of redheads everywhere?), but even she had to admit that this current experience was sublime. All of the students had been blessed with a week of unusually dry and warm weather, providing them with a much-needed reprieve before they headed into exams. Lily spotted a few cherry blossoms floating through the air and making their way over to the lake. She almost felt like they were carrying her troubles and strife away with them.

"Hey girls," she heard Mary shout. Lily propped herself up on her elbows to see Mary and Marlene making their way over to the sycamore tree as well. She and Alice – who currently appeared to be imitating a pancake right beside her – had ventured out to enjoy a rare afternoon off. They had a sneaking suspicion that Mary and Marlene would join them after Divinations. In point of fact, there didn't seem to be a single student who hadn't had the same thought.

"Hey you two," Alice greeted. "How was Divinations?"

"Oh, fabulous," Marlene said sarcastically. "Apparently I'm destined for spinsterhood."

"Well now, we all knew that already, didn't we?" Alice teased. "Hardly need your inner eye for that one."

"Hence my objection," Marlene replied easily. "Did you girls enjoy your luxurious and indulgent afternoon off?"

"Very much so," Alice said happily as she sat up and picked a cherry blossom out of her wavy blonde hair. Lily almost wanted to take a photograph she looked so idyllic. "Lily was just telling me that Slughorn invited her to his party this weekend."

"Congrats Lily!" Mary said with a smile. "I know you were hoping that would happen."

"I hardly would have needed my inner eye for that one either," Marlene commented. "Imagine him snubbing you after you perfectly brewed a love potion in an afternoon and invented a completely original potion a month later."

"Thanks guys," Lily replied, beaming.

"So what are the details?" Mary asked as she sat down. "What kind of party? And who else is going?"

"I think it's a dinner party," Lily told them. "Or a wine and cheese, cocktail, mixer thingy." She shrugged. "Something rich and fancy, I'm sure. He told me it was dressy."

"Oooh, dressy," Mary observed excitingly. "What are you going to wear?"

"Shit," Lily said quickly as she sat up fully. "I don't... I have no idea."

Marlene just chuckled. "What do you wear to parties when you're home?"

"I don't really, er... go to any?" she supplied meekly. "It's just, I'm not home for that many months of the year..."

"But you must have to go to the odd wedding or funeral or something, no?" Alice asked.

"Oh," Lily replied, thinking. "I guess I went to a Christmas party over the holidays. I didn't have anything to wear, though. I had to borrow one of Tuney's dresses."

"Maybe you could borrow it again?" Alice suggested. "We could go send an owl now."

"I'd rather not," Lily said quickly. "Tuney would be furious. And besides, it was a horrible fit." Despite being four years older than her, Petunia was a complete rake of a human being. She had actually been quite vicious over the break and accused Lily of stretching out the dress in the hips.

"Okay... sounds like we need some help," Marlene commented. Then she put her fingers up to her lips and gave a shrill whistle. Lily looked to see that she had beckoned the Marauders.

Lily shifted uncomfortably as the four boys approached. She already felt so conflicted any time she talked to them these days – and talking to them about her apparel was not her idea of a good time.

"McKinnon, Evans... and friends," Sirius greeted, clearly struggling to remember the others' surnames.

"Black et al.," Lily responded in turn. "I see you had the same idea as us," she commented, gesturing to the four girls sitting on the grass.

"Yeah, us and every other student," he agreed. The boys joined them underneath their sycamore tree but, due to the number of other nature-appreciators, they had to sit up close and personal.

"Are any of you going to the Slug Club party?" Alice asked them once they were settled.

Much to her surprise, the boys started howling with laughter. "Absolutely not," Sirius remarked once he had calmed down.

"Not if I could possibly avoid it," Remus agreed. "Which I can. So that's a firm no."

"Not that I'm invited," Peter complained. "But also no."

"So... that's a 'no' then?" Marlene joked.

"Well, not completely," Sirius observed. "Prongs is too good of a Quidditch player. Slughorn practically accosts him every time."

"Ahh, I see," Marlene said knowingly with a glance at Lily. She blushed and flopped back down on the ground to avoid eye contact.

"It sounds like you've been before though?" Alice asked.

Remus groaned. "He asked me twice last year because of my grades... but every time since I've managed to make up an excuse."

Everyone looked to Sirius. "I went as a date back in September. It was a drag and a half. Would not recommend. Why are you asking?"

"Lily's going," Alice told him happily.

"Ooh," Sirius responded. "Look at you, climbing the social ladder. Who are you bringing?" he asked with a wink.

"Er," Lily stumbled. It hadn't occurred to her that she was even allowed to bring a date – but all the same, there wasn't anyone she could think of who she would feel comfortable bringing. "Nobody," she told them. "I'm 'going stag,' as it were." As soon as she said this, Remus, Peter, and Sirius began looking at each other and sniggering. Then a few of them gave in and guffawed. "I really didn't think that was that funny. Or funny at all, for that matter," she huffed.

"We're not laughing at you," Peter explained. "We're just laughing at something you said."

"Oh well if that's all!" Lily exclaimed sarcastically.

"It's an inside joke," Sirius said, wiping his eyes.

"Evidently."

"Alright, enough of this," Marlene interrupted. "We called you over for information. What's the dress code for these parties?"

"They're fancy," Remus replied. "People dress up."

"But... how much do they dress up?" Mary asked, confused by his vague answer. No one offered any additional information. "What do the girls wear?" she tried instead.

"Dresses," Sirius told them.

"Yes, but what kind of dresses?" Mary pried.

Sirius shrugged. "Nice ones?"

All of the girls sighed in unison. "This was so helpful, Marlene," Lily said in jest.

"It's semi-formal," James told them at last with an air of finality.

Lily felt a wave of discomfort, but she tried to swallow her feelings. "Alright," she forced out, turning back to the girls. "Now I know which one of my imaginary dresses would be most appropriate," she joked.

"We'll figure something out for you, Lily," Alice told her. "Don't worry," she assured with a smile.

"Congrats Lily," James said spontaneously. "Can't say I'm surprised."

"Oh thanks," Lily stammered back. She was surprised at this point that James would even remember to say anything to directly to her at all.

"I haven't heard of any other fourth-years getting invited," Mary bragged on Lily's behalf.

"No," James agreed. "It's usually just upper years."

"But Evans is an honorary upper year," Sirius added.

"A great honour indeed," she agreed gravely. The conversation moved to idle pleasantries and after a few more minutes, Lily decided to head back inside to study.

OooooOooooOooooOooooO

As Lily entered her dorm a few nights later, she was greeted with all sorts of excited cheers. "I didn't realize you guys were that lonely with me gone," she joked.

"Of course we were! It was torture without you," Mary joked back.

"We couldn't bear it," Alice agreed. "But also, we solved your problem!"

"What problem?" Lily asked, confused. The only thing that had been on her mind all day was Ancient Runes.

"Your dress," Marlene told her emphatically. "For the Slug Club."

"Oh," Lily acknowledged. "How did you solve that? Don't tell me you bought me a dress," she implored them, filled at once with guilt.

"No, no, nothing like that," Alice assured her. "But we did spend all day studying, and we've figured out charms so that we can alter one of Mary's!"

Lily was positively floored. "You spent all day studying something totally unrelated to the exams we have next week?"

"Yes, and thank goodness for the distraction! Now, try this on," Mary instructed as she gave her a dress on a hanger.

"Where did you get this?" Lily asked awkwardly, mostly as a stalling tactic.

"It was the dress I wore when I was a bridesmaid for my cousin over the summer," Mary replied. "I owled my mum and asked her to send it."

"You had this specially delivered?" Lily asked, feeling even more guilt.

"Yes, and it was nothing. Now go change."

Lily slipped into the washroom so she could change in privacy. She prayed silently that the dress wouldn't be too small as she unzipped it and stepped in. Fortunately, the dress turned out to be too big, which was preferable, as far as she was concerned. Lily stepped back and tried to look in the small mirror to get a sneak peek before having to play model for the girls. The dress was light pink and went down to the floor – and then some, as Mary had several inches on Lily. It had a high waist (tied with a belt of the same colour) and the main skirt was quite flowy. The neckline was by far the most distinct feature. The main neckline was a V-neck and there was a ruffle of fabric cascading down from it that functioned as cap-sleeves over her shoulders. Above the V-neck, there was white lace extending up to her collar bones. It was a dynamite pick for Mary and unfortunately looked considerably worse on Lily; it was also the prettiest garment she'd ever worn. After a moment of turning this way and that, the girls in the other room started to demand that she return.

Lily bunched up the bottom of the dress and hesitantly stepped out of the bathroom. She was sure that she was flushing head-to-toe as she watched the girls appraise her body. After an awkward shuffle to the middle of the room, she dropped the edge of the dress, which fell to a heap on the floor. All three girls ran up and began looking at her from different angles.

"Lily!" Alice practically cried. "I've never seen you dressed up before!"

"Who knew you were this much smaller than me," Mary remarked as she gathered fabric at her waist.

"Alright, alright," Marlene told the other two. "We're going to make her pass out from all the attention."

And so the three of them set to work. Alice had apparently been the best when they had practiced, so she primarily led the show. The spell they had discovered allowed them to pinch fabric, press down the excess, and create a new seam out of nowhere. It was so quick that all of the alterations were finished in only half an hour. More than anything, Lily wished that she could show these spells to her mother, who had always been her family's unofficial seamstress. She knew she would positively squeal in excitement – but that will have to wait three more years, she reminded herself.

"What do you think, Lily?" Mary asked with a big smile.

"Honestly? I'm speechless," she said simply.

"What do you mean?" Alice pried.

"I don't think I've ever worn a dress that's actually fit in my life," Lily explained with a chuckle. "But I'm so sorry it had to come at the expense of ruining one of yours!" she exclaimed, turning to Mary.

"Don't think twice about it," she assured her. "I'm sure we can revert it back. Or I'll just use it as an excuse to buy another one." Lily couldn't ever imagine her parents having such a flippant attitude toward buying expensive dresses.

"Is there anything you want us to change?" Alice asked, wand at the ready.

"Er..." Lily trailed off. She didn't feel entitled to ask for anything else.

"Just tell us, Lily," Marlene instructed.

"The dress looks just fine as is," Lily hastily assured. "It's just... I've never worn a floor-length dress before. I'm a bit worried I'm going to trip over myself. And also I think it makes my hips look a bit large," she muttered at the end, blushing.

"Oh, let's hem it," Alice replied easily. "Where do you want it? Knees?"

"I don't want to completely change Mary's dress," Lily whined, wishing she'd just kept her mouth shut.

"It'll be better this way," Mary told her with a laugh. "Now it'll look like a totally different dress! Besides, James said it was semi-formal, so knee-length would be a better fit."

"Oh," she said simply. Lily had never understood what any of those official dress codes meant. She also got a weird feeling in her gut when she remembered that James was going to be seeing her in something other than her uniform or the odd casual outfit.

In just a few minutes, the girls transformed the dress so it now stopped at her knees. Then Alice donated a pair of white ballet flats (as Lily had never worn heels before in her life). Once they were finished, they all sat on Marlene's bed and looked her over head-to-toe.

"Something's not right," Marlene observed. Lily's heart sank. She knew she looked like an imposter.

"Yeah, but what?" Mary asked.

"I think it's the colour," Marlene argued. "It clashes with her hair."

"Mmm," Alice agreed. "Plus with the shoes it looks to... I don't know, 'young girl in ballet class.'"

"But the colour was half the reason I bought that dress," Mary argued. "I thought it was a really classy choice."

Without a moment more of consideration, Marlene brandished her wand. "Colovaria," she said confidently, pointing her wand straight at Lily. The dress glowed for a brief second and then stopped. When Lily looked down, she saw that she was now donning a dark, emerald green gown.

"Oh Marlene," Alice sighed. "That's perfect. Look at how it matches her eyes!"

Mary got up and slowly circled Lily, making her feel very uncomfortable. "Ignoring the fact that Lily's hair and face are making the whole ensemble very Christmas-coloured," she joked, "you're right. This is much better."

Alice popped over to her trunk and returned with a hand-held mirror. Although it hadn't even occurred to Lily that there was anything wrong with previous colour, she could tell immediately that this colour was far more flattering and mature. She took a long sigh as she twisted this way and that to try and see more. "I think I'm in love," she told her three friends.

OooooOooooOooooOooooO

Come Saturday, Lily found herself struggling to study. Not only had she been studying daily at this point for several weeks, but every time she tried to work through her Arithmancy problems, her mind kept drifting to the party she was going to later that night. Lily could probably count the number of formal events she'd been to in her life on one hand, and she had certainly never been to one without her family. The idea that this invitation was something she had earned – through her own right, and not simply because of her family connections, like many of the other invitees – made her feel deeply proud and accomplished. More than anything, however, Lily found herself ruminating on the dress she had waiting for her in her room. When she had it on the other night, she felt as though she were one of the princesses in the books her mum had read to her as a child. It was also bespoke at the hands of three girls that had donated an entire day to making her feel special. Of course, against her better judgement, she wondered what James would think of her in the dress... probably nothing, she reminded herself. He'll be looking at his gorgeous girlfriend all night.

At half past four, Lily finally surrendered and snapped her Arithmancy book shut. She made her way up to her dorm and, feeling somewhat girly and excited, put on an Elton John record. She started excitedly fiddling with the makeup Marlene had offered to share – it wasn't really something Lily ever did for herself, but Marlene had given her a few tips.

Alice was the first to appear in the dorm. "Oh hi Lily," she greeted with a smile. "I didn't think you'd be back from the library yet."

Lily sighed. "I'm glad I came back early," she told her friend. "I cannot get a handle on this makeup. It looks horrible."

"I'm sure it's not that bad. Let me – oh." Without discussing it further, Alice took out her wand and charmed all of the makeup away. "We'll just try this again."

"I never thought it would be this hard," Lily remarked, slightly embarrassed.

"It's not, really," Alice assured her. "It's just tricky the first few times. Close your eyes." Lily obliged. "Are you excited for tonight? Look up to the sky."

"Yeah, I am," she answered, trying not to move her face too much.

"That's great Lily! I'm so happy for you – you really deserve this. Hmmm," she muttered to herself. "I've never really done make up for a redhead before." She marked her hands with various shades of lipstick and then held her hand up next to Lily's face.

"Me neither," Lily joked.

"We'll try this one," Alice said, mostly to herself. "What time does the party start?" Alice asked. Then she brought a tissue up to Lily's lips. "Blot," she instructed.

"Six," Lily answered.

"Hey girls."

"Oh, Mary, thank Merlin," Alice greeted. "Come help me."

"What are we doing here?" Mary asked as she shrugged off the light jacket she had been wearing.

"Lily's make-up for tonight," Alice said. "It's not going well."

"Oh, good to hear," Lily remarked.

"Whoa," Mary said simply as she came closer to look.

"Hi," Lily greeted.

"What were you thinking?" Mary asked Alice. "She's 14. You made her look 30." Mary assumed Alice's position and started removing some of the makeup.

"Why don't we try some green eye shadow?" Alice suggested. "It'll match her eyes. And her dress."

"Marlene doesn't have any," Mary pointed out.

"I do, though!" Alice exclaimed. She returned with the eye shadow.

"Close your eyes, Lils," Mary instructed. She closed them again.

"Oh yikes," she heard someone say.

"Marlene?" she asked, looking around.

"Lily!" Mary scolded. "I said close your eyes."

"Sorry," she yelped, shutting them once again.

"Don't you think the green eye shadow looks a little forced?" Marlene asked.

"But her eyes," Mary pointed out.

"And her dress," Alice reminded.

"Exactly," Marlene commented. "You don't want to be too matchy."

"Fine," Mary sighed. "Take it off."

"That looks better," Marlene said proudly after a moment. "What does she have on now?"

"Next to nothing," Mary told her. "Just mascara."

"Oh," Marlene said. "Well that's a bit sad. We should get her some eyeliner."

"I had eyeliner on earlier," Alice told her. "She looked like a bit of a tart."

"What?"

"Sorry Lily," she apologized. "You're just so pale. And your eyelashes and eyebrows are so light in colour too. The eyeliner's just too stark."

"Oh," Mary said, snapping her fingers. "I have some light brown eyeliner somewhere in my trunk."

"Why on earth would you have that?" Alice asked with a laugh.

"I don't know, my dad bought it for me. He's obviously clueless. Here we go!"

"For the love of Merlin, Lily, close your eyes."

"Sorry, sorry," Lily squeaked.

"Now look up," Marlene told her. "Look at me," she instructed.

"There we go," Alice said with a sigh of relief. "That looks much better."

"She basically looks the same as every other day," Mary pointed out.

"Exactly! Just ever-so-slightly embellished."

They went and fetched Lily a mirror. She gave a huge sigh of relief. "I don't know what I would do without you three," she said, meaning every word.

"Don't mention it!" Mary assured her. "You can keep the eyeliner too."

"Oh Mary," Lily whined. "I already usurped your dress."

"Just say thank you and go change." Lily went at did just that. When she returned, Marlene took a stab at her hair – which was as frizzy and defiant as ever. However, Marlene managed to twist the top layer up and out of the way, so the frizz was more contained. When that was finished, Lily went and daintily sat on the side of her bed. "What are you doing?" Marlene asked suspiciously.

"I... I'm just sitting," Lily said defensively.

"This is the part where you go to your party," Marlene told her. "See, the hair and the make-up, and all that jazz – that was all just preparatory work."

"I don't want to be too early," Lily complained.

Marlene quirked an eyebrow. "You do know it's already quarter past six, don't you?"

"She told me it starts at six!" Alice called out from the washroom.

"Why are you stalling?" Marlene asked accusatorily.

"Er," Lily faltered. "It's just suddenly donning on me that I won't really know anybody there."

"Oh Lily," Marlene said affectionately. "Let's go." She walked over to Lily's bed, put her hands on both of her shoulders and pulled her up.

"I suddenly don't want to go," Lily whined as she was steered out of her room. She had no idea why she hadn't been filled with dread any earlier at the thought of going to this party – she could only assume that she had been distracted by the pride of being invited, her fixation on what to wear, and the ever-looming threat of exams. Nevertheless, now that it was time to actually go and boldly enter a room full of students who were all older, and none of whom she knew, her entire body was yelling at her to abort. "This is going to be terrible, isn't it?" she asked Marlene after a few minutes of walking.

"Yes, of course it is," Marlene said as though she were calming a small child. "But then you'll come back and tell us about how awful it was. And you'll still be proud you were invited. And you'll still know that you looked amazing in this dress. And you'll know that James thought that too."

"Oh, I see. You're lying," Lily groaned. "You actually had me there for a moment."

"Lying is a bit strong. I would have gone with 'optimistically asserting.' Anyways, you're here."

OooooOooooOooooOooooO

Whatever amount of dread Lily had felt as she was leaving her room, it was a hundred times worse when she stepped into the party. Since she arrived late, the affair was already underway and students were scattered throughout the room holding cocktails. Lily immediately flushed and felt extremely uncomfortable. Although she recognized a handful of people, they were all upper-years from other houses – and she had never spoken to any of them. After standing on her own for several minutes, Lily realized there was a bar in the corner of the room, so she set to work getting herself a drink. She tried to draw the process out as much as humanly possible, so that by the time she returned to the party (a glass of pumpkin fizz in hand), she had successfully wasted a full five minutes. Still lacking a conversation partner, Lily set to work on her drink in order to keep her hands and mouth busy. Thankfully, by the time she secured her second glass of pumpkin fizz, Slughorn called all the students to sit for dinner.

Lily was so relieved at the prospect of any excuse not to stand by herself, she hurriedly made her way over to the group of small tables and sat down on the first chair she encountered. Seeing as how she didn't know any of the students anyhow, she figured she would just take her chances and chat with whoever sat beside her.

"Hey, it's 'Lily,' right?" Lily looked up to see a fifth-year Gryffindor girl.

"Yeah, it's Lily," she answered awkwardly. "And you're Siobhan," she supplied. It was mildly embarrassing that Siobhan had to clarify her name, given that they were just a year apart.

"Putting me to shame!" Siobhan said with a smile. "Sorry to ask, but I was just wondering if you would mind moving to a different table so my friends and I can sit together?"

"Oh," Lily stammered, feeling quite warm. "Yeah, of course," she muttered as she stood up and straightened her dress. That was so embarrassing, her mind kept (unhelpfully) reminding her. Lily looked around, frantically trying to appraise the situation. Unfortunately, she seemed to have lost the upper hand, as almost all of the tables were full of boisterous groups. She spied James and Candice, sitting with several people she didn't recognize, but their table was already at capacity. Accepting her fate, Lily made her way to the only open chair she saw: the one next to Slughorn.

If possible, dinner proved to be an even more grueling experience than the cocktails had been. Professor Slughorn, who had clearly had one too many cocktails, tended to talk over Lily and focus on the students whose parents had illustrious careers. "What do your parents do, Ms. Evans?" he had asked as the students started on their soup.

"My mum's a teacher and my dad works for a bank," Lily told him. She didn't really want any follow-up questions, as her father had a fairly low-level position.

Everyone at the table looked confused. "Like... a muggle bank?" one girl asked.

"Er, yeah," Lily replied with a shrug. She made a show of bending over her bowl of soup as an excuse to end the conversation.

The student who was sitting on her other side, she learned, was Huntly Harris, a sixth-year Ravenclaw who Lily quickly grew to despise. She spent most of the main course pretending to listen to his poorly-rationalized political opinions while secretly fantasizing about watching him trip, fall, and break his nose.

"...So you're seeing some good movements with the hiring legislation, but it was too slow and too reactionary," Huntly said with an air of self-confidence.

"What?" Lily asked, coughing slightly on her water.

"The hiring practices?" Huntly asked. "Do you even read the news?" He gave a small laugh while looking at his friends beside him.

"The ones that won't let muggle-borns work anywhere?" Lily clarified, still not believing her ears.

"Only at a handful of major businesses."

"And you thought these restrictions were 'good movements'?" Calm yourself. He's just an arse.

"Of course," Huntly replied with another arrogant laugh.

"They don't strike you as discriminatory?" she asked, trying to choose her words carefully.

"Oh, I see. We're going to be debating with our emotions now." Huntly put down his flute of champagne and turned to face Lily. Oh no, she groaned internally. Now you've done it. "These businesses have all been threatened by Death Eaters. You have to protect the rights of employers; otherwise the notion of the Free Market and Neoliberalism will just go right out the window." He laughed again.

"I refuse to believe that the Death Eaters are really going to come and kill everyone at the Prophet and the Ministry because of a few muggle-born employees. There would be no wizards left at that point." She was clipping her words and getting dangerously close to an all-out argument.

"What a juvenile way to look at it!" Huntly accused. "There are any number of ways you can take a business down – you don't just have to fly in and kill everybody." The laugh returned. "And ultimately, the downstream economic consequences if these businesses close will be devastating for all of society. So it's actually better for muggle-borns in the long-run if we preserve the magical economy."

Lily was one second away from snapping. "You think it's better for me if I graduate completely unemployable?"

"Well obviously you can't see that now – you're too involved to see rationally. This is why you can't have these conversations with muggle-borns," he said, turning back to his friends.

Lily snapped. In one fell swoop, she slammed her drink down on the table (which promptly broke) and leapt to her feet, causing her chair to make a large, scraping sound behind her. "I'm going to the bathroom," she said sharply to the inquiring looks she got from the students at her own table, as well as the adjoining tables. With that, she turned on her heels and marched out of the room.

Once she made it to the lavatory, Lily leaned on the counter, stared at her reflection, and took a few deep, calming breaths. "Why is everyone such a prat?" she asked her reflection. She idly wished that she had selected Myrtle's bathroom – the pair might actually have something in common tonight.

Absent anything else to do, Lily did actually make use of the lavatory. Quite quickly, she felt her anger melt away. By the time she was finished washing her hands, the only thought on her mind was how desperately she wanted to do anything but return to the party. She leaned against the wall of the bathroom (which was disgusting, but she was beyond caring), and spent several minutes with her thoughts. Every bone in her body wanted her to walk back to her dorm, take off her uncomfortable flats, return Mary's dress, and hide under the blankets of her bed. But then her mind drifted to the potions exam she had on Tuesday morning. Could she really show her face and brew a potion in front of her professor if she had stormed out halfway through dinner and never returned? Begrudgingly, after several minutes, she shifted her weight off the wall and made her way out of the lavatory.

Lily's heart was beating very quickly as she made her way back to the party in the slowest way humanly possible. She paused for an extra few breaths righto outside the door, annoyed by every fragment of conversation she was overhearing. When she thoroughly out of excuses, she finally forced herself to return to the party and headed back to her table. Much to her delight, she seemed to have been gone for such an embarrassingly long amount of time that she had missed not only the end of supper, but dessert as well. Just as she sat down, Lily saw all of the dessert plates disappear with a small popping sound. She revelled in the knowledge that she would surely soon be dismissed.

But, as it turned out, she had celebrated too soon. Slughorn stood up and tapped a spoon against the side of his wine glass to get everyone's attention. "Students, esteemed alumni," he said with a nod to various tables. "It was my honour to host this end-of-term celebration for you all! You're certainly an impressive and well-connected group of young witches and wizards." I'm so glad I was able to regale you with stories of my mother, the school teacher, Lily replied sarcastically in her head. "If you'll all kindly stand up and move to the corners of the room, the dining area will transform into a lounge so we can all enjoy a nightcap!"

No, no, no, Lily thought rapidly as she went to go stand in the nearest corner. She watched in horror as the chairs turned into (admittedly, very cozy) loveseats and sofas, while the dining tables turned into coffee tables and end-tables. The atmosphere of the lounge was actually fantastic – the lights dimmed, some jazz music started playing, students started relaxing. But, for Lily, it meant that she was doomed to another hour or more of this torture. She desperately scanned the group of students, hoping that anyone was leaving, but there were none to be found. Most of them seemed delighted at any opportunity for free alcohol.

And so, feeling forced to stay, Lily found herself sitting on a couch in this make-shift jazz club. She sat alone for the first few minutes, which was both a blessing and a curse. After checking her watch for the tenth time, she started just full-on staring at it. "Is your watch that interesting?"

"Hmm?" Lily asked, looking up. She watched a boy from Slytherin sit next to her on the couch. Without knowing his baseline, Lily was fair certain he was inebriated.

"Events like this are so awkward," he said.

Lily gave a perfunctory laugh. "A little," she said, just to say something.

"Alcohol helps," he told her, raising his glass. Lily didn't know what to say to this and watched him take a sip of his drink. "If it weren't for alcohol, I'd probably be sitting alone on the couch staring at my watch."

"Oh," Lily said simply. She gave him a forced laugh. It irked her to be called out for being antisocial, but it wasn't as excruciating as Huntly Harris telling her to be thankful for not having a job. At this point, Lily was willing to accept any social contact, just as something with which to occupy the time.

"This party is alright," the boy continued with a long drawl. He passed his drink over to his left hand and then moved his right arm to rest on the couch behind Lily. "I think last term's was better, though," he told her. Lily wiggled into the corner of the couch as much as she could, trying to send a clear message that she was not interested.

"I wasn't there," she told him.

"Oh, this is the first party you were invited to?" Lily nodded. "You're losing your Slug Club virginity," he told her with a smug expression.

"Er," Lily mumbled. "Yeah, I guess." Lily was enjoying next to nothing about this interaction.

"So how are you enjoying it?" he asked as he inched closer to her on the couch.

"It's not the best," Lily said lightly. "Really it's not too fun if you're muggle-born," she finished pointedly. Lily wasn't too sure why she was getting so much attention from this Slytherin, but it occurred to her that it might stop abruptly if he knew about her blood status.

"Like I said," he replied smoothly. "Alcohol. Here, you can take mine," he said, thrusting his glass in her hand.

"Oh, uh, no thanks," Lily stammered. "I don't really drink."

"You've never had a drink before?" he asked, amazed. She hadn't actually said as much and his assumption was incorrect, but she wasn't in the mood to correct him. She just shook her head. "I can be your first," he teased. Lily groaned internally at another thinly-veiled innuendo. She wasn't above just giving up and leaving the party (again), but she hoped it wouldn't come to that.

"Schulman," Lily heard. She looked up to see James looming over the pair of them. "She's not interested." She could almost feel her heart roll over in her chest.

"How do you know?" her couch-mate asked calmly. He didn't seem at all bothered at being confronted.

"Her body language," James replied with a small chuckle. "She's clearly uncomfortable." Lily felt a little unusual at being addressed in the third-person.

"She was uncomfortable before I came," the boy insisted. "She was sitting all alone."

"Jeff, buzz off!" James instructed with a laugh. "I know her. I'll sit with her."

"Fine, fine," he said, putting his hands up as though he were surrendering. Then he stood up and sauntered off. James sat down beside Lily, leaving a much more appropriate amount of space.

Lily toyed with thanking him, but didn't pursue it. "Bold assumption," she said instead.

"What, about Jeff?"

"Mhmm," Lily said with a nod. "Maybe he would have been my future husband." She tried to deliver it straight, but could feel her pursed lips twist into a smile. Before she knew it, the pair of them were sharing a hearty laugh.

"He's pretty harmless," James told her. "As far as Slytherins go, anyway." Lily gave him a slow nod. She felt at once uncomfortable and at ease. She wasn't yet sure which feeling would predominate. "So, how's your first Slug Club party going?"

"Ah, what's not to love?" Lily asked wryly. She started talking as though she were enumerating a long list: "Fine food, libations, overgrown babies bragging about their parents..."

James gave a very genuine laugh and Lily assumed that his table, too, had been centred on parental achievements. "I see you've availed yourself of the libations," James commented, his eyes lingering on her hand.

"What? Oh, it's that guy's. Jeff?" She clarified. "He gave it to me... somewhat forcefully." Lily leaned over to put it on one of the nearby coffee tables. She wasn't sure if she was hurt that James thought she was drinking hard alcohol alone by herself or honoured that he viewed her as old enough for that to be possible.

"Whoa," James said simply. "He comes on a bit strong."

"Uh, yeah," Lily agreed emphatically. "You could say that. I practically screamed at him that I was muggle-born and he didn't seem at all put-off."

James frowned. "That really shouldn't change anything. For anyone. But now I'm defending the bloke who was clearly going to try and shag you whether you wanted to or not. So let's change the subject."

"Sure," Lily agreed. She didn't have the time or energy required to unpack his comments. "How's your night going?" she asked to make conversation.

James shrugged. "It's a good excuse to dust off my dress robes. Speaking of, you clean up well."

"Oh, er, thanks," Lily stammered. She felt warm and awkward. "The dress is Mary's," she admitted. "Otherwise I probably would have come in my uniform. Or in pyjamas." She sighed. "So I guess I don't really clean up all that well. But you do," she told him. And it was true. Lily had never seen him in anything fancy before and the sight was absolutely breathtaking. She could almost imagine the two of them were on a date. Then, it struck her that she had been too intimate. "Except the hair," she joked, hoping to lighten the mood. His hair was indeed styled in the patented James Potter manner, in that it was pointing in every direction.

As if on cue, James brought a hand up and ruffled his hair. "It never behaves," he agreed.

"Where's Candice?" Lily asked. She wasn't sure why she asked. It was just the only thing she could think of to say.

"Off schmoozing," James told her.

"Not your thing?" Lily suggested.

"Definitely not." James reclined on the couch. "What do you think they're talking about?" he asked, pointing at a group of students.

Lily looked at where he was pointing. There were four students grouped together – one of whom was Siobhan. The other three Lily didn't know. At present, there was a tall man with dark brown hair talking, drink in hand. "Well my father," Lily said with a grandiose tone of voice. "Who, as you all know, invented the discipline of cosmetic charms and potions as we know it, thinks that I'm the 'one to watch' from my graduation year." James gave a deep, genuine laugh, and Lily couldn't help but smile. She was going to stop, but then she saw that Siobhan was now talking. "What a coincidence," Lily said, raising the pitch of her voice. "My father is also a prick with too much money and ego." James started laughing even harder, clearly not expecting her to use such crude language.

"That's a really interesting point, Siobhan," James said once he had calmed down. They could see that a different student was talking. "See, my parents were inheritors who never lifted a finger in their lives. That's because all four of my grandparents served as Minister of Magic, one after the other. But I don't think that I was any less advantaged just because my parents didn't amount to anything." Lily couldn't help but giggle throughout his fake speech. Possibly against her better judgement, she could feel her tension and stress dissipate. She couldn't even put into words how amazing it felt to have someone come and validate all of her opinions about this silly exercise of flaunting one's privilege.

The pair of them continued in this fashion for some time, with their speculative dialogue becoming progressively more ridiculous. "Did you know that I received nine 'Outstanding' O.W.L.s last year?" James asked Lily while watching Huntly Harris speak to Slughorn across the room.

"Is that so?" Lily asked back, doing her best to impersonate her professor. "I could have sworn I heard Professor Flitwick tell me you received seven 'Dreadful's and two 'Troll's." After her dinner conversation, she just couldn't resist the opportunity to make her version of Huntly extremely dim-witted.

James laughed at her suggestion. "Now that you mention it, that does sound familiar," he – as Huntly – agreed. "But my father assured me he'd get me a job at the Ministry no matter what grades I get. So this whole 'school' thing is really just an elaborate vacation." The pair giggled like a couple of toddlers. "I'm going to go grab a drink," James told her as he stood up. "I'll be back in a second."

Lily took a deep breath in and a long, audible exhale. What are you doing, Lily? a small voice asked in her head. Aren't you supposed to be mad at him? Lily thought about this for a few seconds. And then she groaned. It's so hard to stay mad at him, she whined internally. And it's not like it was doing me any good anyhow. She thought about this for a few more minutes, but wasn't able to reach a conclusion. Finally, as she saw that James was heading back, she told the small voice simply to go away. Can't I have fun, just this once?

James returned with two pints of butterbeer. "For you," he said handing her one. Lily was sure she was beaming as she accepted.

"Where did you even get these?" Lily asked. "I've been guzzling pumpkin fizz all night because that was the only drink on the kids' menu," she said, making fun of herself.

James chuckled. "I have my ways," he said, tapping the side of his nose. Lily rolled her eyes in response. "So," James started, but stopped to take a sip of his drink. "Exams next week," he said simply as he wiped the foam of his lips. "How are you feeling?"

"Oh," Lily said with a sigh, not enjoying the sobering reminder of the unpleasant week she had before her. "I mean, I'm always my worst critic. But even I have to admit that after doing nothing but studying for a full month, it would be unlikely for me to fail." She briefly wondered if it was a bad idea to hint at how they'd been avoiding each other, but it was too late.

"So I won't find you crying in the common room again?" James teased.

"Oh, no, you definitely will," Lily replied immediately. "But it will be less justified this year."

"It was never justified," James said as he threw an arm around her shoulders. Lily's entire body was instantly on fire, but she tried to act nonchalant. Her thoughts started spiraling out of control. This can't mean nothing, right? Lily desperately asked herself. On the other hand, Sirius does this all the time, she reminded herself. Heart sinking, Lily unfortunately remembered that Candice was at this event and could easily see the two of them at any moment. There was no way James had forgotten about this, and so... it must be completely platonic.

Lily quickly realized she had been silent for too long and would be about to make things awkward (if they weren't already). "What about you?" she asked, in order to keep the conversation going.

James laughed. "After O.W.L.s? These will be a breeze."

"Oh, true. I'm not looking forward to those."

"Don't worry. You're going to get nine 'Outstanding's, unlike our dear friend Huntly."

Lily chuckled. "Seems unlikely," she deflected. His arm is still around you, she reminded herself unhelpfully. "Any plans for the summer?" she asked quickly.

"Oh, the usual," he replied easily. "Sirius is staying with us. We'll no doubt drive my parents crazy. You?"

"You know I do summer school," Lily reminded him. "So... more of the same. Worse dorm-mates." James chuckled. "Actually, scratch that. My parents are lovely. It's just the one annoying dorm-mate, really."

"Ah, and how is our dear friend Petunia?" James asked.

"Apparently she has a boyfriend," Lily told him, referencing her most recent correspondence with her parents.

James gasped as though he had just heard some excellent gossip. "Tell me everything," he demanded.

"I don't know much," Lily told him. "I've never met the man. I imagine he's quite boring – that really turns her on."

"Ooh," James said as he removed his arm so that he could rub his hands together excitedly. Lily couldn't remember ever having missed something so emphatically. She almost wanted to reach over and put it back. "Do you know anything else about him?"

"Uhh," Lily said, thinking. "His name is Vernon."

"Vernon?"

"I know. I think he's a year or two older than Tuney. Also I think he works in an office or something? But now I can't remember if I read that or just assumed."

"Hmm. And that's all we have to go on?" Lily nodded. "Okay, a boring man named Vernon who may or may not work in an office. And who, for some reason, is interested in dating your sister."

"Hey!" Lily cried, playfully swatting his arm. The little voice in her head reminded her to be careful, but she again told it to go away.

"What? You think your sister would make a great girlfriend?"

"I, er..." Lily trailed off. "For the right person..."

"Exactly!" James exclaimed happily. "So now we get to muse about who that 'right person' is. I'll start things off. I reckon... he's trying – and failing – to grow a mustache." Lily couldn't help but smile. "Now it's your turn," he prompted.

What would Tuney want in a boyfriend? Lily asked herself. "I bet he has a car," Lily answered. That wasn't funny, she chided. "I bet it's a really modest, entry-level car that he brags about every ten seconds," she elaborated, hoping that came off funny.

James laughed and Lily cheered internally. "You muggles and your cars," he said, shaking his head.

"Us muggles?" she questioned.

"Oh. Uh. You're sort of an honorary muggle?" he suggested lamely.

"I'm a lot of 'honorary' things these days," Lily observed with a frown.

But her frown soon melted away as she and James continued suggesting silly physical and personality traits for Vernon – who, as it turned out, was six inches shorter than Petunia, had hobbies ranging from bird-watching to stamp, and couldn't name a single country in Africa or South America.

Lily sighed after her giggling subsided. "I bet Tuney's already coached him to hate me," she said more seriously.

"No," James objected.

"Oh, not directly," Lily added quickly. "I doubt he even knows she has a sister. But they will have agreed amongst themselves that people should have sensible hair that's straight and brown. Or that you can't trust people who eat candy, because they're clearly too capricious."

"Your sister doesn't eat candy?" James asked as though that were the most shocking piece of news he'd ever heard.

Lily shook her head slowly. "'Fraid not," she replied. "She chews my mum out too if she buys too much for me. So I basically don't get any all summer long."

James raised his eyebrows to show his surprise. "I'm not going to lie, if we weren't allowed to eat candy all year, I think we would both starve."

Lily nodded in agreement. "How was the dessert tonight?" she asked him. "I didn't get any."

James gasped quite melodramatically. "Why not? Are you ill?"

Lily smiled and shook her head. "I wanted some, believe me," she said as though she had just suffered an affront to her character. "But I missed it."

"Where were you?"

"I, er..." she was about to answer with 'the lavatory,' but realized that might send the wrong message. "I couldn't take any more of the conversation so I... excused myself."

"Hmm," James said, obviously debating whether or not to pry further. Then he evidently decided against it. "Well, I can't do anything about these horrible conversationalists. But I can do something about this no-dessert situation." He stood up from the couch and held out an outstretched hand. Lily was briefly reminded (as she so often was) of that day at the Quidditch pitch. Blinking it away, she grabbed James' hand and allowed him to pull her to her feet. She had expected him to drop her hand immediately but he actually dragged her all the way across the room.

"Where are we going?" Lily asked with a small laugh. She was shushed in response. James stopped in front of the bar.

"O'Brien," James greeted the bartender – a student Lily vaguely recognized as an older Gryffindor boy.

"Don't make me get you more butterbeer," the student groaned in response.

"No, we're well beyond that!" James cried happily. "We need some dessert."

"What?" the boy protested. "Read the sign – this is a bar. We serve drinks here."

"What sign?" Lily asked, bemused.

"The—" the student cut himself off to lean over the front of the table. "I thought there was a sign there," he admitted lamely. "Anyways, it's a bar."

Lily and James sniggered. "It seems to me like it's just a place to get refreshments amidst a good-natured party. Dessert would certainly fit with the theme." James gave Lily a dashing wink as he said it.

The boy sighed, clearly resigned. "Are you going to blackmail me again?" he asked apathetically.

"Absolutely," James responded. "Just like Slughorn presumably did. How did he force you to do this?"

"By allowing me to take potions at all," he sighed. "I only got an 'A' on my O.W.L."

"Ahh," James said as though he were piecing together an intricate puzzle. "It all starts to make sense." Rather than carry on any more conversation, the boy walked away.

"Blackmail him with what?" Lily asked, smiling.

"Quidditch," James told her. "I threatened to bench him if he didn't get us butterbeer." Lily realized as he said it that she had seen the boy on the Gryffindor team before.

Lily wasn't sure what to say to that. "It was good butterbeer," she settled on eventually.

"I try," James replied easily. Neither said anything for a moment, and it was heavenly. It wasn't the tense silence that had consumed them for weeks; it also wasn't awkward like it would have been months ago. The conversation had come easily, and the silence that followed came equally easily. They stood there, young and dressed up, engaging in minor antics, perfectly content. After all the turmoil Lily had been through, she would have been completely content to exist solely in this moment forever.

Of course, the moment was improved when the bartender returned with a bag of cupcakes. "This was all I could find," he droned as he handed it over. James immediately turned and gave it to Lily.

"Thanks Adam!" James called merrily as he and Lily walked away. After picking a random spot at the edge of the room, the pair of them leaned back, opened their bag, and each ate a cupcake. Lily suspected they were inspired by Bertie Botts, as she was reasonably certain hers was candyfloss flavoured. Mid-cupcake, James froze as though he had just seen something very unusual. "Is your dress changing colour?" he asked her, clearly staring at her chest.

Lily looked down, and was able to see that ruffle at the top was indeed starting to return to its previous pink colour. "Oh," she told him, mildly embarrassed. "I guess Marlene's charm wasn't very good," she mused. James didn't say anything and continued to stare at her dress, as though he were transfixed. "It's kind of like Cinderella," Lily joked. She realized that reference wasn't likely to go very far as soon as she said it. "Er, which is a muggle thing," she added. "Don't worry about it."

James blinked and tore his eyes away. "It's mesmerizing," he said, mostly to himself. He finished the last bite of his cupcake.

And then he made Lily feel like Cinderella in more ways than one. "Well," he said as he rolled up his cupcake liner, "I should get back to Candice."

"What?" Lily asked immediately, without thinking. She was filled at once with rage, disappointment, and a tremendous sense of abandonment.

"Candice?" James joked. "My girlfriend?"

"Yeah, I think I've met her once or twice," Lily replied darkly. She brought her hands up and covered her face for a few seconds. When she looked back at James, she was already starting to slowly back away from him. "I've had enough of this," she told him simply. "I'm out." Then Lily marched out of the party for the second time in one night.

Once Lily had fled, she only made it a few determined steps before she gave in, slowed her pace, and felt tears in the corners of her eyes.

"Lily," she heard James' voice. She turned around to see that he had followed her.

"What?" she asked him, raising her hands a little and letting them fall back to her hips with an audible smack. She looked up at the ceiling and blinked a few times to try and keep herself from crying.

"What was all that about?" he asked. She practically wanted to slap his beautiful face for being so unbelievably thick.

"I don't know, James," she said, shaking her head. "Maybe you should run back to your girlfriend. You can figure it out together." Lily turned around and started to leave again; this time, she couldn't keep her tears from falling.

"You're being unreasonable."

"What?" Lily cried, seemingly for the hundredth time. She turned around so fast her hair whipped into her other shoulder. Some of the portraits lining the hallway woke up and started complaining about the noise. They must have had quite the sight looking at a 14-year old girl in a multi-coloured dress holding large bag of cupcakes and yelling like a lunatic. "I'm being unreasonable?" she asked loudly, ignoring the paintings' protestations.

"Yes," James replied. "I just spent half the night with you!"

"Oh," Lily said quietly, nodding her head. She took a few steps closer. "So now you've finished with your charity work for the evening?" she spat. Her anger was building up so fast, she wouldn't have been surprised if she burst a blood vessel in her face.

"Don't be like that," James complained. "I'm just saying that you can't be upset about me going back to Candice after sitting with you for hours." Lily doubted that they had even spent so much as a single hour together, but that was hardly the most objectionable part of his statement.

"Oh, I get it," Lily continued. "Everyone gets their fair share of 'James' time, right? So you ignore me for a month and then spend an hour with me at a party. How does that work out on your ledger James? All balanced out?" Her voice was rising and, combined with the portraits (some of whom were now taking sides), there was a resounding cacophony of sound. They were egging her on, and Lily was egging herself on.

James looked taken aback. "Lily," he said simply.

She ignored him and carried on. "Or how does this one add up, James?" she asked viciously. "I saved your life, and you... I don't know," she had spoken too quickly and desperately looked around for something with which to finish her thought. Her eyes landed on the cupcakes. "Got me desert?" she asked. "Yeah," she told herself, nodding. "I gave you your life; you gave me a cupcake. Fair trade?"

"Lily," James repeated. He was staring right at her, practically begging her to stop. But it was too late.

"Oh, sorry, it's not just the cupcake. Not sure how I forgot. It's a whole bag of cupcakes plus one ortwo hours of your very valuable time. Does that sound right?"

"Lily for Merlin's sake!" James called, his composure breaking. "You're not my girlfriend!" he shouted. "You don't have any claims to my time."

Lily froze. She could feel his words cut right through her chest and into her heart. Never in her years of knowing him would she ever have imagined she would actually hear James scream the words 'you're not my girlfriend.' She took a deep breath in and out. Neither one of them said anything for a few pregnant seconds – though many of the portraits gasped and muttered amongst themselves. After another second, Lily actually smiled. It felt like a dark, sadistic smile that she wasn't at all used to wearing. "You're right," she said, resigned. "I'm not your girlfriend. Always good to touch base about that sort of thing," she joked, filled with malice. "So what am I?" she asked with a provocative sort of shrug. "Because I'm not your friend either."

"What are you talking about?" he whined.

"Well, James, I've seen you with your friends," she told him. "You're supportive. And friendly. You spend all your time together. You have your pacts and your stories and your inside jokes. Hell, you even have stupid names for each other that you won't explain to me. You go off for boys' nights and have secret hideouts. And then," she paused and took a breath. "You have me. I get none of that. And I don't feel like your friend so much as your little sister who you occasionally let tag along." James's face was unreadable. "And then," she added with a dark chuckle. "I'm supposed to be grateful for the opportunity to tag along."

James took in her words and looked somewhat like a deer in headlights. "It's not like that," he said quietly. He didn't look too convinced.

"Oh? So what's it like?" Lily asked. He didn't offer up an answer. "Do you want to know why Candice thought I was in love with Sirius?" she asked after a moment. She waited for him to make eye contact. "That was the only explanation she could produce as to why I was always hanging around like an awkward fifth-wheel." She gave him another moment to respond, but he was silent again. "Even your girlfriend," Lily went on. "Your confidante – I assume. The person who presumably knows you best in the world. Even she didn't know why I was there or who I was to you. And if your girlfriend doesn't think I'm your friend, I'm going to have to go and assume it's because I'm not your friend," she finished firmly. "So, what am I?" she repeated again, bitterly.

"I," James started, but stopped. "Lily," he tried again.

Lily shook her head back and forth. "Feel free to come find me if you ever figure it out," she told him as she turned again to leave. This time he let her go.